XQQ SPRING 17

SPRING 17 

VOLUME VII 

CROSS QUEER QUARTERLY 

This Quarter’s Cover

Group Ads are free! 

Any LGBTQ2 group who provides peer or community support can request a group ad 

Getting your group ad in print makes it easier to get additional sponsors (and $$) 

Each ad lists up to three sponsors 

100% of $$ from group ads go directly to the group—it’s our way of saying Thanks! 

Details 

Group Ads are 1/8 page display ads that run for one year. 

The rate for this type of ad is $500. 100% of ad revenue 

funds are passed through to the group. Each ad lists up to 3 

sponsors, so a group can earn up to $1500 / year / ad. A 

group may have more than one ad. 

Any LGBTQ2 group can request a group ad by becoming a 

Rainbow Health Co-op group member ($5). Further details 

about the co-op and group membership are found on the 

membership application. http://xqq.ca/membership. Look for 

regular members and select the group option. 

Group ads are a great marketing investment for businesses 

and service providers 

They are affordable and sponsors get a 50% discount on 

any other ad! 

Get Started Today! 

Registration as a group is simple— 

do it online or email us today! 

http://xqq.ca/membership 

groups@rainbowhealth.coop 

Group ads are offered as a simple way for small groups to raise 

core operating funds from local businesses and organizations in 

their communities and are not intended for other purposes.

XQQ, Cross Queer Quarterly 

is published by the XQQ collective 

and covers BC and the Salish 

Sea. 

XQQ is printed in four editions: 

Islands, Coast, Valley and Interior. 

Each edition has unique regional 

information pages. 

XQQ is distributed directly to 

more than 250 locations across 

BC and the Salish Sea. These 

include: Pride events, shops, 

clinics, libraries and community 

centres. 

XQQ is published 8 times a year 

and updated online in between. 

Edition Format Deadline Publish 

Imbolc Digital Jan 30 Feb 6 

Spring Digital Mar 13 Mar 21 

Beltane Print Apr 17 May 1 

Summer Print Jun 5 Jun 21 

Lammas Digital Jul 25 Aug 1 

Autumn Print Sep 4 Sep 21 

Samhain Digital Oct 16 Oct 31 

Winter Print Dec 4 Dec 21 

We welcome submissions and listings 

from community members wherever 

they reside 

Our focus is BC and the Salish Sea 

Our Blue Sky 

Imagine a place where 

queerness is not just tolerated 

– it is celebrated. 

Think of the Vancouver’s 

Gastown in the 70’s, or the 

Castro district in SF. 

Services and culture develop 

to match the neighborhood. 

People are attracted to areas 

that match who they are. 

350 million North Americans 

choose where to live. 

That is a lot of queers no 

matter how you count 

them. Join with us and 

build a community near to 

you. 

XQQ thanks our primary sponsor for 

their ongoing support. 

Rainbow Health Co-operative 

#107—1208 Wharf Street 

Victoria, BC V8W 3B9 

Tel (888) 241-9992 

3 This Issue 

4 Editor's Note 

5 Letters 

6 Trans News 

7 Health News 

8 Livelihood New 

9 Queer News 

10-11 Ramblings 

12-13 Pride & Joy 

14-15 TransVine 

16 First Circle 

17 Conversations 

18 Present as you Intend 

19 N2Q 

20-21 ooT & abooT 

22-23 N2Q 

24-25 HK4T – Core 

26-27 HK4T – Change 

28-29 Our Stories 

30-33 Rainbow 

Resources 

34-37 Horoscope 

38 Pepper & Pearl 

SPRING 17 

XQQ is produced by 

Atley Jonas – Editor in Chief 

ChrŸs Tei – Production Editor 

and 

Issa Mistake – Proofing 

Noah Onearound – Layout 

CONTRIBUTORS IN THIS ISSUE 

Barry Perlman – Horoscope

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nisi ut aliquip ex ea commo- 

JOIN CHEF ALEXANDRA AS SHE SHOWS US HOW TO PREPARE CHEAP AND NUTRITOUS 

VEGETABLE STOCK FROM LEFTOVERS AND USE IT TO MAKE A FABULOUS MEAL WITH 

BEANS – OR SIMPLY JOIN US FOR DINNER! 

5:00 - Cooking Class with Alexandra 

6:00 - Snacks and socialize before dinner 

6:30 - Community Dinner 

SATURDAY APRIL 29TH 

FAIRFIELD GONZALES COMMUNITY CENTRE 

MORE INFO AT XQQ.CA/CALENDAR











































































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HORIZONTAL FOOTER

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Section 1.10.32 of 

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written by Cicero in 

45 BC 

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NEWS ABOUT REGIONAL 






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et Malorum", 


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accusantium 






























































































nisi ut aliquid ex ea commodi

PRIDE ORGANIZATIONS 



















et Malorum", 


45 BC 



accusantium 


































































ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE 

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE

TransVine 

Creates connections across regions by helping groups 

connect to each other 

TransVine Binds through: 

Topics — First Circle and Community Conversation channels share 8 topics each year 

Technology — The channels are powered and protected by Discord and Slack 

Tools – Groups get a leg up with revenue, websites, email and promotion 

Teamwork — Join our call for a BC wide Community Council with an equal part in 

policy Go to Change.org and search on the word “TransCare”. 

Go to 

xqq.ca/transvine 

to get started!

Binding Together Homegrown Strengths 

BOTH TOPIC CIRCLES FOLLOW 

First Circle is a way of sharing 

topics of concern to the trans 

community in protected space 

that connects people who get 

together and people online. 

Each discussion lasts 6 weeks. 

Default topic—social transition 

First Circle is powered by Discord 

SIX THINKING HATS FORMAT 

Community Conversations extend 

First Circle discussions 

and broaden them to include 

allies and families of trans people. 

Through discussion—we 

see if we can find consensus 

on a topic. 

First Circle is powered by Slack 

TransVine develops self-sustaining groups. Most small groups are just trying to keep it together enough to meet 

again in a month and have minimal time and resources. We help with the resources through or Group Ad program 

which puts a simple to use fund raising tool into the hands of LGBTQ2 support groups. Groups that participate in our 

sustaining program get help with websites, email and promotions. 

Trans people everywhere need a world that accepts them and grants them equity. Nothing happens without effort 

and the world is not going to change by itself. The trans community needs to remain engaged in systems and programs 

that affect them, including their local Pride organizations and the healthcare system. 

In British Columbia, the TransCare BC provincial wide trans health program needs an effective balance to having 

bureaucrats determine what is best for us. They haven’t done a very good job so far, given the lack of equity in 

healthcare access. Join our call today for a BC wide community council with an equal part in policy at Change.org.

First Round 

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sunt in culpa qui officia 

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laborum." 



et Malorum", 

written by Cicero 

in 45 BC 

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omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem 

accusantium 






















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commodi consequatur? 

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qui in ea voluptate 

velit esse quam nihil molestiae 

consequatur, vel illum qui 

dolorem eum fugiat quo voluptas 























nisi ut aliquid ex ea commodi

Conversations 































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labore et dolore magnam 

aliquam quaerat voluptatem. 

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fugit, sed quia consequuntur 

magni dolores eos 

qui ratione voluptatem sequi 

nesciunt. Neque porro 













eum iure reprehenderit qui in

ONE EIGHTH 

VERTICAL 

EDGE 

PRESENT AS YOU INTEND

NEAR TO QUEERS 

CENTRAL 

SALISH SEA 

Town Name 

Libraries / Centres 

Commonwealth Pool 

4636 Elk Lake Drive 

250-475-7600 

Juan de Fuca Library 

4636 Old Isl Hiway 

250-475-7600 

Food / Drink 

My Coffee shop 


250-475-7600 

My Pub Shelbourn 

4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 

Fashions / Clothing 

WIN Consignment 


250-475-7600 

Salons 

Your name here 


250-475-7600 

Other 

Queer Bike Shop 


250-475-7600 

Town Name 




250-475-7600 

Commonwealth 

Pool 




XQQ 








Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 


Commonwealth 

Pool 




Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 





Commonwealth 

Pool 









Fashions / Cloth- 



250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

XQQ = Magazine Available at 



NORTH 

SALISH SEA 

Town Name 


Commonwealth 

Pool 




Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 



Commonwealth 

Pool 









Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 

this location 


Commonwealth 

Pool 




Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Commonwealth 

Pool 











Town Name 




250-475-7600 



250-475-7600 

Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 




Commonwealth 

Pool 




Commonwealth 

Pool 







XQQ

This Week 

Next Week 

M O N D A Y 

May 

8th—14th 

M O N D A Y 

M O N D A Y 

T U E S D A Y 

Queers Get Wet 

All Bodies Swim 

Esquimalt Rec Centre 

W E D N E S D A Y 

T U E S D A Y 

Healthy Voices 

Mt Tolmie Vancity 

4:00—5:00 

T U E S D A Y 


T H U R S D A Y 

UVIC Transgender Chair 

Grad House Happy Hour—4:00 

S A T U R D A Y 



F R I D A Y 

F R I D A Y 



HANS KAI 4 TRANS + VSLCS 

COMMUNITY DINNER 

S U N D A Y 

S U N D A Y 

S U N D A Y 

WHAT IS GOD’S PRONOUN? 

D E T A I L S A T X Q Q . C A / C A L E N D A R

May 

May 

May 

15th—21st 

22nd—28th 

June 

29th—4th 

M O N D A Y M O N D A Y M O N D A Y 

T U E S D A Y 

T U E S D A Y 

Healthy Voices 

Mt Tolmie Vancity 

4:00—5:00 



T U E S D A Y 

F R I D A Y 






F R I D A Y 

F R I D A Y 



S U N D A Y 

S U N D A Y 

S U N D A Y 

G E T Y O U R E V E N T L I S T E D - e v e n t s @ x q q . c a

Yukon / NWT 

Whitehorse 

Yellowknive 

North Interior 

Fort St John 

Prince George 

North Coast 

Prince Rupert 

Haida Gwaii 

North Salish Sea 

Nanaimo 

Alert Bay 

Central Interior 

Williams Lake 

Kamloops 

Okanagan 

Kelowna 

Penticton 

Southeast BC 

Nelson 

Cranbrook 

Fraser Valley 

Hope 

Abbottsford 

South Mainland 

Vancouver 

New Westminster 

Central Salish Sea 

Victoria 

Saltspring Island 

South Salish Sea 


Rainbow 

Resources 

Near 2 Queers 

Classifieds 

ARE ORGANIZED IN THE 

SAME WAY – REGIONS 

FROM NORTH TO SOUTH 

– THEN BY CITY 

(PARTIAL CITY LIST SHOWN) 

Rainbow Resources 

IS DIVIDED INTO SIX 

SUBCATEGORIES OF 

TRANS INFORMED 

SERVICES 

SUPPORT GROUPS 

Hans Kai 4 Trans 

(888) 241-9992 

www.xqq.ca/hanskai 

Hans Kai happens where 

you live – call today 

PRIDE 

Local Pride Organization 

(888) 555-5555 ? 

www.mylocalpride.org 

PRIMARY CARE 

PARAMEDICAL 

COUNSELLING 

LEGAL 

Near To Queers 

IS DIVIDED INTO SIX 

SUBCATEGORIES OF 

QUEER FRIENDLY 

BUSINESSES 

CULTURE / INFO 

Your Business Name 

(888) 555-1515 

www.yourwebsite.com 

FOOD / DRINK 

FASHIONS 

SALONS 

RECREATION 

ENTERTAINMENT 

Standard listings 

A STANDARD LISTING IS 

THREE LINES DEEP 

NAME, PHONE, WEBSITE 


(888) 555-1515 


Co-op Members 

A COMMUNITY CO-OP 

MEMBER GETS 2 MORE 

LINES WITH THE FIRST 

LINE IN BOLD – SPACE 

TO ADD YOUR MESSAGE 

Ratings 

Each listing is rated 

(888) 555-1515 ? 

Default is question mark 


(888) 555-1515 

member rating shows a 

single rainbow by default 

plus larger listing 


(888) 555-1515 

members recommended by 

other members get a double 

rainbow 

Display Ads 

Members Only 

A recommended member 

(888) 555-1515 

Can upgrade to inline 

display ad like this for a 

small added cost 

Queer Body Work 

We help 

you let it go 

www: yourwebsite.ca 

Getting Started 

Is Very Simple 

Go to xqq.ca/membership 

Do everything online 


Victoria 


Art Gallery of Grtr Victoria 

(888) 241-9992 

www.art museum 

Watch for community days 

Greater Victoria Library - 

1388 Blanshard Street 

www.librarywebsite 

Greater Victoria Library 

9994 McKenzie 

www.librarywebsite 

FOOD / DRINK 

Paparazzi Night Club 

(555) 515-5555 

Paparazziclub.com 

? 

? 

RECREATION 

Commonwealth 

Recreation Centre 

(250) 555-5555 

Website or email address 

Teen Saltspring & Family groups Island 

YMCA 

1322 Langford ParkWay 

www.ymca.langford.ca 

? 

? 

FASHIONS 

WIN Thrift Stores 

1311 Cook Street ? 

Www.womeninneed.org 

Rosie’s Recycled Fashions 

1322 Cook Street ? 

www.rosiesclothes.com 

SALONS 

Island Styles Salon 

Ask for Roberta 

(250) 555-5515 

Juan de Fuca Rec Centre 

? 

Trans Informed Help 

Call us at (888) 241-9992 ENTERTAINMENT 

Intreprid Theatre ? 

Email us at 

Phone # or email address 

members@rainbowhealth.coop Single line of information 

There are three 

types of resource 

pages in each copy 

of XQQ Magazine. 


lists trans informed 

services. 

Near To Queers 

lists businesses 

that are queer 

friendly. 

The Classifieds 

lists job and volunteer 

opportunities 

along with queer 

friendly housing. 

The pages are divided 

by region 

first, then by city. 

Businesses, professionals 

and organizations 

are invited 

to join the co-op as 

community members. 

Ratings shown are : 

Unrated—assigned 

a Question Mark 

Co-op Member— 

Single Rainbow 

Recommended by 

Members— 

Double Rainbow


CENTRAL 

SALISH SEA 

Town Name 




250-475-7600 



250-475-7600 

Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 




250-475-7600 

Commonwealth 

Pool 












Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 


Commonwealth 

Pool 




Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 





Commonwealth 

Pool 












250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 




NORTH 

SALISH SEA 

Town Name 


Commonwealth 

Pool 




Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 



Commonwealth 

Pool 









Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 

this location 


Commonwealth 

Pool 




Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Commonwealth 

Pool 











Town Name 




250-475-7600 



250-475-7600 

Food / Drink 



250-475-7600 


4636 Cook St 

250-475-7600 




250-475-7600 

Salons 



250-475-7600 

Other 



250-475-7600 

Town Name 




Commonwealth 

Pool 




Commonwealth 

Pool 








P H YS ICAL 

ONE EIGHTH 

VERTICAL 

EDGE 

ONE QUARTER 

VERTICAL EDGE 

ONE EIGHTH 

VERTICAL 

EDGE

T R ANSITION 

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE 

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE

S O C I A L

T R A N S I T I O N 

ONE EIGHTH 

VERTICAL 

EDGE 

ONE QUARTER 

VERTICAL EDGE 

ONE EIGHTH 

VERTICAL 

EDGE

Sorted by Region and Town 

SIX CATEGORIES OF 

TRANS INFORMED SERVICES 

SIX CATEGORIES OF 

QUEER FRIENDLY BUSINESSES 

DISPLAY ADS 

STANDARD 

MEMBER 

EACH LISTING SHOWS A RATING 

R A I N B O W 

3 

Editions 

13 

Regions 

Islands 

Coast 

Interior 

26 

Yukon / NWT 

Whit ehorse 

Yel lowkni ve 

North Interior 

Fort St John 

Pri nce George 

North Coast 

Pri nce Rupert 

Haida Gw ai i 

North Salish Sea 

Nanaimo 

Alert Bay 

Central Interior 

Wil liams L ak e 

Kamloops 

O k an ag a n 

Penti cton 

So u th e ast BC 

Nelson 

Fraser Valley 

Abbottsf or d 

South Mainland 

New West minster 


Vict or ia 

Sal tspring Island 

South Salish Sea 

Anacort es 

12 

Categories 



PRIDE 

PRIMARY CARE 

PARAMEDICAL 

COUNSELLING 

LEGAL 

MENTORS 

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R E S O U R C E S

For the week of 

April 24—30 

ARIES (March 21-April 19): A developing conjunction between still-retrograde Mercury and rabblerousing 

Uranus in your sign, Aries, makes you something of a live wire this week—shocking, electrifying, 

creator-of-sparks, and a threat that could burn the whole place down if not handled with care. 

But that portrait I painted isn't entirely off-the-mark in describing your sign in general… if certain 

social mores or protocols of appropriate behavior weren't a productively restraining influence on 

your feral nature. To be clear, 'productively restraining' means I think there are good reasons (which 

I won't detail here) why we mustn't be as uncompromisingly fierce or fiery in every moment as we 

might wish. So, at a moment such as this when your usual self-restraints (i.e., whatever level of selfcontrol 

you typically keep yourself tuned to) aren't buckled quite as safely-and-snugly, you'll be able to experience a much 

greater freedom of expression (which could feel so thrilling that you never want to hold yourself back again!)… and, at the 

same time, you'll be under a greater hazard of recklessly igniting some shit you maybe hadn't meant to set aflame. 

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): During yet another week when accidental utterances, swift reversals, or 

unanticipated newsflashes threaten to significantly alter your viewpoint, Taurus, please do your 

damnedest to make sure it's not your swashbuckling impudence, careless handling, or impatient 

temper which is the source of the jolt. Though none of these traits are especially characteristic of 

you under typical circumstances, your fuse is short right now—and the potential impact from letting 

it burn uncontrolled could be messier than you'd want, since it's unclear exactly what might explode 

in reaction. One way to talk yourself out of any hasty mouthings-off or retaliatory deeds: Think 

about how the possible ripples-of-consequence could hit your pocketbook, your standing in relation 

to a key partner (who might suffer collateral damage), and/or your credibility among anyone watching how you conduct yourself. 

A less-risky way of playing out this astrology is to let someone else commit the startling deed or declaration… and to allow 

it to startle you, whether happily or disappointingly, into a perspective-transforming epiphany. 

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): No matter how you spin your message, Gemini, your attempts to speak 

with the delicate finesse that'll yield the broadest appeal for your ideas still won't come off as diplomatic 

in tone as you might like. The current conditions of communicator-planet Mercury (retrograde 

and conjunct Uranus) make it likelier that any preferences, partialities, or partisan blindspots will 

emanate through your words and into the public arena whether intended to or not. Though this 

isn't especially good news if you're trying to play to the middle or soften your sharpest positions 

beneath a cloak of phrasings-which-pander, such inadvertent revelations of your truest sentiment 

can ultimately work to your benefit (after the initial phase of uneasy vulnerability). Fragile relational bonds which might otherwise 

be predicated on steering clear of certain topics perhaps won't survive this uncensored peek into your mind, but should 

you be censoring yourself to protect a connection not strong enough to weather the truth of your differences? Those worth 

protecting, on the other hand, can surely accommodate further discussion about anything you might've handled indelicately.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Your loose lips may not sink the entire ship, Cancer, but they could well 

ratchet up any underlying tensions between you and those with commanding influence. Mercury 

retrograde joins Uranus in your 10th, a combination that can incite unwitting public blunders, professional 

missteps, and/or the unexpected dissemination of some offhand statement you hadn't 

meant for everyone to hear. Of course, this same astro-influence could instead bring a sudden malfunction, 

rearranging, structural change, or urgent public-relations matter unrelated to anything you 

did wrong… but nonetheless your response will be critical to whether it's ultimately handled with 

panache, or if the 'solution' ends up being worse than the original problem. Whatever the case, 

you'll have to think on your feet, while still keeping them firmly planted on the ground. Though possible fixes or best-waysforward 

may magically pop into your head, you should slow the process between 'brain-flash' and 'outward divulgence' 

enough so that you can properly vet any idea, walking yourself through the steps of how it would actually work. 

LEO (July 23-August 22): Though this whole extended moment may feel like little more than a bunch 

of second-guessing self-doubt, Leo, it's in fact your golden chance to work out any kinks in your current 

life-directional course. I don't necessarily recommend sudden immersion in a far-reaching program 

that promises to 'put everything into perspective', last-minute unplanned-for departures to 

impractical and/or exotic destinations, or any abrupt turn which drops you off the radar that's been 

tracking a certain progress. Yet, the impulse drawing you to such divergences isn't random. That 

hunger for an infusion of re-inspiring determination from some radical rerouting is your clue that 

something about a current activity or involvement is probably sapping your inspiration, or you 

wouldn't be looking for greater meaning elsewhere. Though blindly following this sort of impulse could bring more chaos than 

clarity, paying attention to it might be a good next-step in addressing whatever's creating this undercurrent of discouraging 

discontentment. (Unless your problem is impatience, in which case you'll just have to wait.) 

VIRGO (August 23-September 22): Who can you continue to develop intimacy, trust, depth, and a 

mutually profitable future with, Virgo? Whose psychological tangles or unhealed wounds may be 

obstructing the progress? Before you point either a longing or a blaming finger at anybody else, 

start by assessing how answers to these questions might apply to you. Your subject-position in this 

is not 'observer', but 'co-participant'. I wonder if it's even possible to separate your behavior from 

its interplay with the whole dynamic you're playing out with this person (or entity). However, your 

feelings remain your own… and they alone can expertly guide this latter phase of a process that's 

already been underway for a couple months. The only specific 'outcome' to push towards: to the 

next chapter, conclusively, whatever it may be. This week, notice how any surprise disclosures or sudden turns in the conversation 

rouse a particular feeling in your body (e.g., excitement, dread, shame, relief, hope). Would you want more of what this 

glimpse-of-emotion appears to promise, should you carry on in this arrangement together? 

STARS OUR OURS graciously provided by Barry Pearlman 

Say Hello to Barry at http://www.astrobarry.com

LIBRA (September 23-October 22): If you are faithfully seeing this conversation through, Libra, this 

could be a momentous week in its unfolding… due, specifically, to a pressure having built up to such 

a degree that certain sentiments or pieces of relevant information simply cannot be held back any 

longer, and so they come rolling forth in a single spontaneous blurting-out. Obvious follow-up questions: 

Who's been the one holding something back, the other person or you? Why has this particularity 

been held back until now? And, perhaps most critical to how your week ends up, was the 

'spontaneous blurting-out' a conscious intent (on your or their part) to courageously move forward 

into greater transparency—or did it slip out in anger, fear, panic, or self-defense? This last bit really 

does go far in determining whether the week's momentousness is a breakthrough or a breakdown… mainly because it profoundly 

matters whether you mutually intend to share more about yourselves with each other (even if it happens clumsily 

and/or brings a temporary sting) or if one of you, in a heated moment, gets exposed in your ongoing withholding. 

SCORPIO (October 23-November 21): Roll with the methodological snafus, mechanical breakdowns, 

and/or bodily hiccups, Scorpio, rather than overreacting with a jerky expression of restless insistence, 

accusatory criticism, or brute force. Just because your operative capacity to 'make it work' 

with the technique or timing you'd hoped for may become frazzled or foiled, that's not an invitation 

to jeopardize the whole project or program with a hasty Merc-rx-conjunct-Uranus response. While 

an abrupt departure from the existing approach might indeed prove warranted, it wouldn't be wise 

to seek such a breakthrough by frantically trying out possible fixes under the immediate heat of 

duress… not without a critical few-moments' pause, to consider what else might potentially get forgotten, 

mangled, or destroyed in the process, as an undesired side-effect. It'd be better not to advance quite as quickly or efficiently—despite 

the inconvenience and irritation—than to miscalculate a supposed solution and end up getting knocked back a 

step or four. Even in light of the likely need for improvised innovation, whatever you do shouldn't lose you any solid ground. 

SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21): What sounds attractive, appealing, or enjoyable in an 

excitedly frisky moment, Sagittarius, may or may not be especially well-suited to the person you're 

in the hard-earned process of becoming. Well, is it or isn't it? Just inserting that question into your 

consciousness now—rather than letting a heated impulse, despite its tempting allure, carry you 

away on its jet-propulsive thrust—ought to be enough to at least force a pause in advance of any 

diving-in. And once the question's been asked, you'd be willfully thoughtless not to ponder potential 

answers… including one (or more) which might allow you to somehow moderate or modify an otherwise 

risky behavior or over-the-top pursuit so it doesn't disrupt your longer-term trajectory. Though 

of course your horoscope applies specifically to this week's astrology, there is a more broadly applicable lesson to be learned 

here: You can simultaneously rein yourself in, to a fair degree, and still let loose in celebration of life's in-the-moment pleasures 

and possibilities. It all boils down to learning how to constructively impose that reflective pause at the appropriate moment 

of your decision-making.

"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, 

But in ourselves, that we are underlings." 

William Shakespeare 

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 19): Who knows what exactly might prompt your sudden rethinking, 

Capricorn… but it's a wonder of human perception and sense-making that we could attentively 

gaze at the same situation for so long and then, one day, spontaneously see something about it that 

changes our entire perspective forevermore. That's the sort of private-processing 'eureka!' which 

your week's astrology undeniably favors. However, the very fact of my reporting this to you might 

inspire you to hunt far and wide for a new insight—and that could cause you to miss it, just the way 

some folks have the hardest time forcing their eyes to adjust their focus so it reveals the optical illusion 

they're so desperate for a glimpse of, while others' eyes naturally fall into it. Your best bet for 

'seeing' it will come from a simple commitment to pay close attention, during the week ahead, to any observation (whether 

straight-on or through peripheral vision) which spurs a double-take, a novel inquiry, or a fresh interpretation of the scene. 

Don't cling to it; just notice how it opens a new channel of understanding. Explore this channel on your own first, before discussing 

its potential ramifications with anyone. 

AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18): In any and every situation, please don't forget who you're talking 

to, Aquarius. As authentic as one can possibly be in the world, we still automatically present certain 

angles of our being to certain people based upon who they are to us. That is natural human behavior 

for anybody who is empathetic, responsive, and considerate to others. During a week when 

retrograde Mercury is even more erratic in its unpredictability, however, you could easily become so 

caught up in a lively or stimulating interaction, you hastily overlook the specific traits and/or socialidentity 

qualifiers which characterize the other person(s) you're interacting with… in the process, 

haphazardly stepping on toes or offending sensibilities without the slightest intent to do so, merely 

because you were really into going on and on about your experience, understanding, or opinion. The behavioral possibility I 

just described wouldn't be some horrible transgression, of course, in the right company—in fact, it's just how free selfexpression 

works when you're among friends. With the wrong folks, though, it could altogether demolish that moment's rapport… 

maybe even permanently burn a bridge, depending on who you're talking to. 

PISCES (February 19-March 20): Beware of just jumping in with help, Pisces, before stopping to consider 

how else you would otherwise use those resources. What self-supporting project or purpose 

of yours won't get the time, attention, energy, and/or financial investment you'd instead spend on 

playing the hero? I pose that question to deliberately frame your considerations against the limits of 

earthly reality and the corresponding need to allocate assets wisely: If you put your 'money' (literal 

or proverbial) in one place, it cannot simultaneously be in another place. You could sprinkle small 

bits here and there, of course… but will spreading that contribution around too thinly leave it insufficient for doing much good 

anywhere? Hopefully, by even raising this issue, I'll inspire you to think twice. Please remember, again: You are trying to accomplish 

something of unquestioned personal importance out in the world, while this unanticipated circumstance (whatever it 

may be) might only be a relatively minor blip on the big-picture radar. Devote your valuable resources to what you're now 

proving is most valuable to you, on an ongoing basis. . 

STARS OUR OURS graciously provided by Barry Pearlman 

Say Hello to Barry at http://www.astrobarry.com


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Dear P&P: Two years ago I travelled 

to Bangkok on holiday. While I was 

there I met a kathoey. (I don't like 

to use the term ``ladyboy`` because 

people get the wrong idea in their 

heads). Long story short, we fell in 

love, and last year I paid for her to 

come live with me in Canada, with 

the expectation that she would 

eventually get surgery and we'd get 

married. But now, she says she 

doesn't want to go through with the 

transition. She says she still wants 

to be with me, but has changed her 

mind about getting the operation. 

As for me, I consider myself to be a 

straight male, and really don't want 

to marry another male. What 

should I do? 

- One Dick Too Many 

Dear Dick: You ARE one! And while I 

was tempted to end my reply right 

there, I’m afraid you wouldn’t get it, 

and there would still be one dick too 

many… So do read on. 

Starting a relationship with ANY preconceived 

notion that the other person 

will change for you, out of love, or 

simply because you ask them to, is 

pretty stupid. 

Pardon my bluntness, but it IS. You 

don’t even need to bring dicks and 

vagges into it. How many people have 

married a smoker, thinking that the 

other person will quit once they’re 

married? It doesn’t work that way, 

hon. 

These conversations usually take the 

form of “If only (s)he loved me 

enough, (s)he would ___.” But rarely does that ever 

work out to anyone’s advantage. 

Love’s got nothing to do with it, mainly 

because love doesn’t work that way. 

Love must be unconditional (or it’s not 

really love), and as for change… The 

simple fact is, the only person you can 

ever change is yourself. 

As I read your letter, there were just 

so many unanswered questions in my 

mind that I actually wondered whether 

your situation was real, or if it was 

just a put-on. Well, call me gullible, 

but for the time being I’ll actually pretend 

that you ARE for real and asking 

this as a serious question. See what a 

good mood I’m in? 

First of all, just by you using the term 

“kathoey,” it tells me that you know at 

least SOMETHING about Thai culture, 

or in this case, subculture. You, of ALL 

people, should know that the term 

“kathoey” is extremely broad, and is 

by no means limited to trans women. 

Kathoey can refer to themselves as 

male, or even a third gender. In fact, if 

this person actually TOLD you they 

were “kathoey,” I might suspect that 

they see themselves as male, rather 

than trans-female. If they identified as 

female, they would more likely use the 

term “sao praphet song.” So I wonder… 

Did she really even AGREE to surgery? 

Or was that wishful thinking on your 

part? Maybe there was a language barrier. 

Second, let’s assume for a minute that 

everything is exactly as you wrote it. 

My next big glaring question, is: did you 

actually fall in love with HER? Or did 

you fall in love with her body and a 

promise of lady-parts to come? And if 

it’s the latter, (you horndog), how are 

you going to love her when she’s a 75 

year-old Thai grandmother? You DO 

realize that marriage is supposed to last 

a lifetime, right? Or did you think that 

you’d just trade her in for a younger 

model when she was no longer attractive 

to you? 

Finally, your words asserting that 

you’re a straight male rather surprised 

me. Do you really think that a male or 

female is defined by the parts dangling 

between their legs? And even if you 

did, what brought you into this relationship 

in the first place? Assuming 

you were attracted by something OTH- 

ER than her physical features (which 

might be generous here), her femaleness 

(or maleness) did not seem to be 

an issue then. So why is it now? Have 

you considered researching what being 

pansexual means? A pansexual is someone 

who is attracted to a person based 

on their character and regardless of 

their gender. Maybe some time spent 

reflecting on who YOU are is the key 

here, rather than making an issue out 

of what you want someone else to be. 

Pepper & Pearl

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE 

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE 

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE 

ONE 

QUARTER 

SQUARE 

ONE EIGHTH 

HORIZONTAL FOOTER

XQQ SPRING 17

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