“I think many years ago an advanced civilization intervened with us genetically and gave us just enough intelligence to develop dangerous technology but not enough to use it wisely. Then they sat back to watch the fun. Kind of like a human zoo. And you know what? They’re getting their money’s worth.” - George Carlin * * * Riddles for the Kids A farmer’s cows disappeared and he found them together in his cornfield. One was facing north and the other was facing south yet they could see each other. How? - They were facing each other. What often strikes you in the face, yet you can never see it? - The wind. What can speak every language in the world? - An echo. * * * In case you were wondering... For Jell-O wrestling fans: Pour 2,347 boxes of Jell-O into an eightfoot-square padded box, add boiling water, and chill for two days. Weight lifting: Make dumbbells by filling two empty, clean Clorox Bleach bottles with sand. Fishing: Lure fish with SPAM which makes excellent bait, according to Ann Kondo Corum, author of Hawaii’s SPAM Cookbook. - Offbeat Uses for Everyday Things by Joey Green Politics * * * “The trouble with politicians is they see, but they don’t see far. They wear The Paso High FFA Livestock Judging Team recently placed first place in the State of California and will compete at the Nationals in October, from left: Coach Mark Clement, Nathanael Bourgault, Branson Medieros, Jake Dilger, and Kaitlyn Bedell. reading glasses when they are looking into the future; they got their putter in their hand, when they ought to have their driver.” “Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with nowadays.” - Will Rogers * * * “A gorilla walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The bartender was amazed to hear the gorilla speak, but brought him a beer anyway. The gorilla finished the beer and handed the bartender a twenty dollar bill. The bartender just couldn’t believe that a gorilla knew anything about money, so In a unique business relationship, Shoreline Awning, 13th and Paso Robles Street in Paso Robles, has opened a Micro store offering indoor and outdoor furniture from Daylight Home Lighting & Patio in San Luis Obispo. Shoreline has occupied the space for a decade utilizing the walls and overhead space for awning and shade structure display. When the floor space became vacant Russ Meznerich, owner of Shoreline Awning, convinced John Billings, owner of Daylight, to consign merchandise to the Shoreline store. “It’s a great fit for us both,” said Meznerich. “We wanted to fill the showroom with the kind of quality furnishings that John offers and are needed locally.” he only gave back one dollar in change. “Hope you enjoyed your beer,” he said to the gorilla, “We don’t get too many gorillas coming in here.” “At nineteen dollars a beer,” said the gorilla, “it’s no wonder.” * * * Signs of the Apocalypse “Oilers general manager Craig Mac- MacTavish fired coach Ralph Krueger over Skype.” “A school in the West Coast Conference self-reported an extra-benefit violation to the NCAA after one of its golfers washed her car on campus using water from a university garden hose.” - Sports Illustrated Shoreline Awning features Daylight Micro Store Now the North County has immediate access to some of the home furnishings previously offered only in San Luis Obispo at Daylight Home Lighting & Patio. The selection includes the only American-made patio furniture available for more than 100 miles in any direction and both indoor and outdoor furniture from the highest quality manufacturers from around the world. All merchandise is available immediately and at “better than Internet prices.” Daylight began as a street corner flower stand in 1973 and has grown to offer the largest selection of patio furniture in California. It was one of five finalists for Patio Store of the Year in 2012. The Micro Daylight is open Monday-Friday, 9 a.m.- 5 p.m. The El Paso de Robles Area Historical Society Presents North County Community Quilt Exhibit thru <strong>July</strong> 31 FRIDAY NIGHTS MUSIC IN THE PARK Join us for a cocktail and a great dinner while you enjoy the music in the park across the street! D I N N E R S P E C I A L S T H R O U G H M O N T H O F J U LY Mondays Tuesdays Wednesdays Thursdays GRILLED PEACH SALAD with chicken, goat cheese, slivered almonds, dried cranberries and organic greens with a lemon grass vinaigrette Pound of Steamed CLAMS with salad & garlic bread FISH TACOS with Spanish rice and avocado salsa BABY BACK RIBS cole slaw, garlic bread & fries Featuring a Display Celebrating the Life of Francis Bailey Carnegie Historic Library City Park 800 12th St. • Paso Robles FREE TO THE PUBLIC — Open at 11 am 7 Days a Week — 1114 Sunday 11-4 Pine Street, Downtown Paso Robles 238-3929 Tues, Thurs-Sat 10-4 SOUP SPECIALS Contemporary Comfort Food Complete Bar! Enjoy Your Favorite Cocktails Extensive Wine List Friday-Seafood Chowder, Saturday-Sweet Potato Bisque, Sunday- Artichoke Bisque, Monday through Thursday-Chef’s Choice All our desserts are homemade! 12 Paso Robles <strong>Magazine</strong>, <strong>July</strong> <strong>2013</strong>
After 29 Years We are Declaring Our INDEPENDENCE Help us liquidate 4 acres of all your yard and garden needs 2630 Ramada Drive 227-6225 Open 7 Days <strong>July</strong> <strong>2013</strong>, Paso Robles <strong>Magazine</strong> 13
Change language