The Inkling Volume 1

When you go to the movie theatre, what do you expect? The
rustling of over-priced popcorn snacks? The smell of sweaty coach
potatoes who have lugged themselves to the cinema to watch Star
Wars for the seventeenth time? Or do you expect to be blown out
of your seats, witnessing something you’ve never seen before, with
characters you adore and a story you relate to…?
Now I think about it, that’s exactly what I hope for. Perhaps not
every time, but I do hope that every film will tell a unique story and
say something different to me. I’m not going to walk into ‘My Little
Pony: The Movie’, sadly an actual film coming out soon, expecting
an Oscar Best Picture winner (although that would be amazing to
see).
If you don’t walk into a film expecting the best possible thing that
film could be, then why bother? Why pay the £10 fortune to go and
see something that you don’t believe in? Why is it not okay to ask
that of a film?
Surely it is?
If you look back on this year, what films do you think of?
Personally, I think of ‘La La Land’, my favourite film to be released
in the UK this year. That film did blow me out of seat. I instantly fell
in love with the setting, the characters and the story, and to date I
have watched ‘La La Land’ five times since release - twice in
cinema and three times at home on Blu-Ray.
So my question to you is why can’t every film be like that? If ‘La La
Land’ did it, then why can’t ‘My Little Pony’? Okay, I do now feel ill
having posed that question, but I just need to prove my point.
But in all honesty...why can’t it? Do Hollywood executives know
which films are going to make the money and win the awards, so
they just don’t bother with the others? If so, why?
Now I know since the beginning I have just been throwing
questions at you and ranting about La La Land (but then if you
know me then I never really do stop ranting about ‘La La Land’, so
we don’t have to worry about that). Question after question and all
this article is now is like an angry protest at Hollywood and it’s
dumb movies. But that’s not what this is. I’m merely here to open
your eyes further, so that the next time you slide on to the
uncomfortable leather of a cinema chair with popcorn in hand and
an empty wallet, you can ask yourself if it was all worth it.
We have now entered a rocky age of cinema: the rise of the guilty
pleasure. Everyone has at least one: a film that they pretend to
hate spitefully but, behind closed doors, they adore to the bottom
of their heart. Mine is ‘Alvin and the Chipmunks’. 1...2... and 3. Not
4. ‘The Road Chip’ is the worst thing I’ve ever seen. However, the
rest are superb in my mind. I could very comfortably sit and watch
all back to back just as much as I could watch ‘Star Wars’.
So then what do we do now? This article has been about trying to
get Hollywood to stop making bad movies but now I’ve openly said
that I love three awful films - awful films that are quite
frankly embarrassing to love.
I guess what I am trying to say is that movies deserve a certain
image, a vision, a crew that love what they are doing and want to
do it in their own way. If we look at recent cinema however, it’s
evident that Hollywood isn’t allowing this to happen.
Take ‘Star Wars’. Everybody’s heard of it - if not, then I don’t think
I want to know you. But that’s besides the point: ‘Star Wars’ is a
multi-billion pound franchise which stretches over forty years. In
2012, when Disney bought out Lucasfilm and announced to the
world that the Force had returned (the ‘magic powers’ in ‘Star
Wars’. Again, if you didn’t know that then I don’t want to see you
ever) everybody in the world went absolutely ballistic with
excitement. “‘Star Wars’ is back!” was all over Twitter; “The Force
is with me!” covered Facebook “I love you Disney!” was constantly
popping up on Instagram.
When this juggernaut of a franchise space-warped into cinemas in
December 2015, fans everywhere were over-the-moon. Most
people had a great time, thrilled to see Han Solo, Princess Leia
and Luke Skywalker (for literally less than a minute) on the big
screen for another adventure. Some fans, however, went
supernova as the film was ‘too nostalgic’ and ‘too alike the original
trilogy’. This resulted in Disney filming extensive reshoots on
‘Rogue One: A Star Wars Story’ which, when it came out the
following year, was one of the most unique and out-there Star Wars
movies to date.
However, when the film garnered worse reviews than the
previously mentioned ‘The Force Awakens’, Disney were left with
some questions: ‘Why have we done this?’ They must have
thought. ‘We had a formula, so why may something different?’ This
resulted in two directors of Star Wars sequels being let go because
of ‘differing visions’...Absolute rubbish if you ask me!
I think that Lucasfilm are too scared to take a risk. With their
blockbuster franchise, they’ve stuck to the formula and now
coming soon to theatres are two ‘Star Wars’ movies with some
different numbers in front of them but still the same old characters
waving their lightsabers round for two more hours.
So what can happen to change this? In my mind, it’s actually quite
simple: allow films to made how the filmmakers want to them to be.
Film companies hire world-renowned directors and
cinematographers and so on to make interesting and unique films -
so let them do so.
The biggest problem in modern day Hollywood is not the box office
and how much money a film makes, it is what has the longest
lasting legacy as a ground-breaking film or a guilty pleasure in the
back of people’s minds. The highest grossing movie of all time,
‘Avatar’, came out in 2009 and since then, the buzz has died down
and I barely ever hear people talk about it. I hear people talk of
‘Toy Story 3’, ‘Inception’ and ‘Iron Man’ - movies out around the
same time. Legacy is more important than money because the
more money a film makes, the more Hollywood thinks that they can
pump out endless numbers of them which all make the same
amount. Take Avatar: which has 4 more sequels in production
before 2025. Seriously!
So, (I really have to stop starting these paragraphs with so) the
next time you walk into the cinema and book your tickets, maybe
pick a film with a little bit of character - he oddball. Not the next
‘Transformers’ or ‘Despicable Me’. Someone in the crowd will be
just like you, looking for a lovely night at the cinema - instead of out
making their own adventure in the city of stars. If you didn’t notice I
just made three ‘La La Land’ references in that last sentence.
I really do have to get a life.