5-11 February 2018 - 16-min
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5 - <strong>11</strong> <strong>February</strong>, <strong>2018</strong> 13<br />
Think - Tanks<br />
“A<br />
T<br />
India’s only International Newspaper<br />
NEW DELHI TIMES<br />
Domestic Abuse : Let’s start a Conversation<br />
◆◆<br />
By Dr. Pramila Srivastava<br />
@PramilaBK<br />
ps.a@iins.org<br />
ll too often women believe it is a sign<br />
of commitment, an expression of love,<br />
to endure unkindness or cruelty, to forgive<br />
and forget. In actuality, when we love rightly<br />
we know that the healthy, loving response to<br />
cruelty and abuse is putting ourselves out of<br />
harm’s way.”<br />
Bell Hooks<br />
So today let’s talk about a topic that is<br />
calling out for our attention, I know it’s<br />
a heavy topic and usually we talk about<br />
lighter thing but I feel that in order for our<br />
spiritual growth dealing with abuse that has<br />
happened personally or in someone else’s<br />
life is essential. Abuse comes in many forms;<br />
◆◆<br />
By International Institute<br />
for Non - Aligned Studies<br />
@iinsNAM<br />
iins@iins.org<br />
all over the world millions face domestic or<br />
intimate partner violence (IPV) this statistic<br />
includes both men and women.<br />
A shocking statistic was that in America, 20<br />
people per <strong>min</strong>ute are abused by an intimate<br />
partner, one would think that the rate in a<br />
developed country would be less.<br />
That’s our first mistake as a society to think<br />
that only people of lower economic strata<br />
face domestic violence, it is present in all<br />
strata’s of economy and all countries be it<br />
third world or a highly developed country.<br />
We are all at risk for being abused or<br />
beco<strong>min</strong>g an abuser in this aspect of human<br />
psychology we are all alike.<br />
The abuser<br />
Well If you think that abuse means<br />
to hit the other person and break<br />
things you are right but that is not<br />
the only form, abuse means to crave<br />
control and do<strong>min</strong>ate and this can<br />
be done in various ways, besides<br />
the obvious and very damaging<br />
physical abuse there is verbal abuse,<br />
emotional abuse etc.<br />
Verbal abuse is so tricky, so you<br />
think I’m not hitting that person,<br />
but you are still damaging another<br />
person by being selfish, impatient,<br />
highly critical, showing lack of empathy etc.<br />
Emotional abuse is similar, when the person<br />
manipulates you using strategies like<br />
isolating you from your friends which is<br />
called ‘taking hostages’, because by the time<br />
you need to talk to someone, you have no<br />
friends and you’re completely emotionally<br />
dependent on that person. Because none<br />
of them were ‘good enough’ or they are<br />
‘the worst things for you’ ‘they’re jealous<br />
of us’. Emotional abuse also means that<br />
the victim is being treated to hot and cold<br />
moods, they can go from fun loving to angry<br />
to completely silent as a way to punish the<br />
other person, so the victim is constantly<br />
walking on eggshells trying to figure out that<br />
person’s mood.<br />
How to emerge as a survivor<br />
The first thing to know is that there is<br />
no shame, most abusers take years of<br />
emotionally manipulating you to the point<br />
where whatever they do you feel like you<br />
have no other choice but to stay. Maybe<br />
you’re financially dependent on the person,<br />
or emotionally whatever may be the scenario<br />
know that you are the one in control, stop<br />
bla<strong>min</strong>g yourself because you are not<br />
responsible for his/her moods, you are not<br />
his/her punching bag, there is nothing that<br />
you could do to make them stop being an<br />
abuser except leaving them.<br />
Because of the way the relationship has been<br />
built in your <strong>min</strong>d, the abuser’s first trick is<br />
to make you feel worthless and small.<br />
By picking up on your smallest mistake or<br />
imagined mistakes, by calling you worthless,<br />
by telling you repeatedly that you are not<br />
good enough and that they are putting up<br />
with you. An intimate relationship is so<br />
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sacred so there is a lot of trust that we place<br />
on our partners, so when they start saying<br />
these things a part of us believes it.<br />
Don’t be scared of confrontation, the worst<br />
thing you can do is believe in the lies he/she<br />
is feeding you. Stand up for yourself, don’t<br />
be scared set your limits.<br />
If you feel like you are in danger, get help;<br />
reach out to someone who can get you out.<br />
If there isn’t danger then find a way and the<br />
strength within you to walk out the door<br />
because you are worth it.<br />
No matter what the other person has told<br />
you don’t forget that you are so special and<br />
deserve a chance at a happy life. So if you<br />
are in an abusive relationship right now, stop<br />
bla<strong>min</strong>g yourself and find a way out and let<br />
the healing begin.<br />
If you have just gotten out of an abusive<br />
relationship, then good on you because<br />
unlike what the outside world will say it<br />
is an extremely difficult thing to leave that<br />
kind of a relationship.<br />
The trick is to never forget who you are and<br />
what you’re worth. Though your abuser<br />
would have attempted to tear down your self<br />
worth don’t fall for it.<br />
You are an amazing person with so much<br />
potential; you are not what your abuser says<br />
you are. So stand up for yourself, fight for<br />
yourself and remember you will emerge as a<br />
victorious survivor not a victim.<br />
NAM reaffirms the importance of Biological Weapons Convention<br />
he Biological Weapons Convention<br />
(BWC), the first multilateral disarmament<br />
treaty banning the development, production<br />
and stockpiling of an entire category of<br />
weapons of mass destruction, was opened<br />
for signature on 10 April 1972. The BWC<br />
entered into force on 26 March 1975. As<br />
mentioned in the text of the Convention,<br />
the States Parties to this Convention are<br />
deter<strong>min</strong>ed to act with a view to achieving<br />
effective progress towards general and complete<br />
disarmament, including the prohibition<br />
and eli<strong>min</strong>ation of all types of weapons of<br />
mass destruction, and convinced that the<br />
prohibition of the development, production and<br />
stockpiling of chemical and bacteriological<br />
(biological) weapons and their eli<strong>min</strong>ation,<br />
through effective measures, will facilitate<br />
the achievement of general and complete<br />
disarmament under strict and effective<br />
international control.”<br />
BWC relies primarily on a network approach<br />
based on coordination with international,<br />
regional, and nongovernmental organizations<br />
and initiatives as well as other nonproliferation<br />
regimes in order to address the<br />
interconnected nature of biological threats<br />
in a holistic manner. Under the framework<br />
of the BWC, improved coordination would<br />
provide positive externalities for managing<br />
disease, whatever the cause. Such an<br />
approach ensures that resources are used<br />
optimally to provide benefits for many.<br />
Disarmament has been a key objective of the<br />
Non-Aligned Movement since its inception,<br />
The Movement has taken cognizance of the<br />
threats posed by biological and toxic weapons<br />
and thus has reiterated the significance of the<br />
BWC. NAM Member States that are party to<br />
BWC have reaffirmed that the possibility of<br />
any use of bacteriological (biological) agents<br />
and toxins as weapons should be completely<br />
excluded, and the conviction that such use<br />
would be repugnant to the conscience of<br />
humankind. They recognized the particular<br />
importance of strengthening the Convention<br />
through the resumption of the multilateral<br />
negotiations for a legally binding Protocol<br />
dealing with all Articles of the Convention,<br />
in a balanced and comprehensive manner,<br />
including through verification measures<br />
bearing in <strong>min</strong>d that the lack of such<br />
verification regime poses a challenge to the<br />
effectiveness of the Convention, and urged<br />
the party rejecting negotiations to reconsider<br />
its policy.<br />
NAM has reiterated the call to promote<br />
international cooperation for peaceful purposes,<br />
including scientific-technical exchange. The<br />
Movement has underlined the importance<br />
to maintain close coordination among the<br />
NAM States Parties to the Convention and<br />
highlighted that the BWC forms a whole and<br />
that, although it is possible to consider certain<br />
aspects separately, it is critical to deal with all<br />
of the issues interrelated to this Convention<br />
in a balanced and comprehensive manner.<br />
NAM Member States have been active<br />
participants in the Review Conferences on<br />
BWC. At the 17th NAM Summit held in<br />
Venezuela in 20<strong>16</strong>, NAM highlighted the<br />
key role of its Member States in the the<br />
adoption of the important decisions related<br />
to the implementation of Article X of the<br />
BWC, especially by emphasizing the need<br />
for enhancing international cooperation,<br />
assistance and exchanges in toxins, biological<br />
agents equipment and technology for<br />
peaceful purposes, bearing in <strong>min</strong>d the<br />
Action Plan on the implementation of<br />
Article X submitted by the NAM States<br />
Parties at the Sixth Review Conference, and<br />
the additional NAM States Parties proposal<br />
on a mechanism for the full, implementation<br />
of Article X of the Convention presented<br />
more recently.<br />
NAM has further encouraged the BWC<br />
States Parties to implement the Article X,<br />
as set forth in paragraphs 50-61 of the Final<br />
Document of the Seventh BTWC Review<br />
Conference. NAM has also welcomed the<br />
outcome of the Seventh Review Conference<br />
and in particular its decision to include<br />
cooperation and assistance as one of the<br />
Standing Agenda Items, with a particular<br />
focus on strengthening cooperation and<br />
assistance under Article X, as well as<br />
the Conference’s decision to establish a<br />
database system to facilitate requests for<br />
and offers of exchange of assistance and<br />
cooperation among States Parties, and the<br />
establishment of a Sponsorship Programme,<br />
funded by voluntary contributions from<br />
States Parties, in order to support and<br />
increase the participation of developing<br />
States Parties in the meetings of the intersessional<br />
programme in the framework of<br />
the BWC.<br />
NAM has reaffirmed that the respective<br />
mandates of this Convention and other<br />
international organizations should be respected,<br />
while utilizing the experiences of the<br />
relevant multilateral organizations dealing<br />
with human and animal health on issues that<br />
are of direct relevance to the Convention,<br />
and that no actions should be taken to<br />
under<strong>min</strong>e the convention and/or interfere<br />
with its mandate.<br />
(in arrangement with<br />
News from Non-Aligned World)<br />
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