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5 - <strong>11</strong> <strong>February</strong>, <strong>2018</strong> 13<br />

Think - Tanks<br />

“A<br />

T<br />

India’s only International Newspaper<br />

NEW DELHI TIMES<br />

Domestic Abuse : Let’s start a Conversation<br />

◆◆<br />

By Dr. Pramila Srivastava<br />

@PramilaBK<br />

ps.a@iins.org<br />

ll too often women believe it is a sign<br />

of commitment, an expression of love,<br />

to endure unkindness or cruelty, to forgive<br />

and forget. In actuality, when we love rightly<br />

we know that the healthy, loving response to<br />

cruelty and abuse is putting ourselves out of<br />

harm’s way.”<br />

Bell Hooks<br />

So today let’s talk about a topic that is<br />

calling out for our attention, I know it’s<br />

a heavy topic and usually we talk about<br />

lighter thing but I feel that in order for our<br />

spiritual growth dealing with abuse that has<br />

happened personally or in someone else’s<br />

life is essential. Abuse comes in many forms;<br />

◆◆<br />

By International Institute<br />

for Non - Aligned Studies<br />

@iinsNAM<br />

iins@iins.org<br />

all over the world millions face domestic or<br />

intimate partner violence (IPV) this statistic<br />

includes both men and women.<br />

A shocking statistic was that in America, 20<br />

people per <strong>min</strong>ute are abused by an intimate<br />

partner, one would think that the rate in a<br />

developed country would be less.<br />

That’s our first mistake as a society to think<br />

that only people of lower economic strata<br />

face domestic violence, it is present in all<br />

strata’s of economy and all countries be it<br />

third world or a highly developed country.<br />

We are all at risk for being abused or<br />

beco<strong>min</strong>g an abuser in this aspect of human<br />

psychology we are all alike.<br />

The abuser<br />

Well If you think that abuse means<br />

to hit the other person and break<br />

things you are right but that is not<br />

the only form, abuse means to crave<br />

control and do<strong>min</strong>ate and this can<br />

be done in various ways, besides<br />

the obvious and very damaging<br />

physical abuse there is verbal abuse,<br />

emotional abuse etc.<br />

Verbal abuse is so tricky, so you<br />

think I’m not hitting that person,<br />

but you are still damaging another<br />

person by being selfish, impatient,<br />

highly critical, showing lack of empathy etc.<br />

Emotional abuse is similar, when the person<br />

manipulates you using strategies like<br />

isolating you from your friends which is<br />

called ‘taking hostages’, because by the time<br />

you need to talk to someone, you have no<br />

friends and you’re completely emotionally<br />

dependent on that person. Because none<br />

of them were ‘good enough’ or they are<br />

‘the worst things for you’ ‘they’re jealous<br />

of us’. Emotional abuse also means that<br />

the victim is being treated to hot and cold<br />

moods, they can go from fun loving to angry<br />

to completely silent as a way to punish the<br />

other person, so the victim is constantly<br />

walking on eggshells trying to figure out that<br />

person’s mood.<br />

How to emerge as a survivor<br />

The first thing to know is that there is<br />

no shame, most abusers take years of<br />

emotionally manipulating you to the point<br />

where whatever they do you feel like you<br />

have no other choice but to stay. Maybe<br />

you’re financially dependent on the person,<br />

or emotionally whatever may be the scenario<br />

know that you are the one in control, stop<br />

bla<strong>min</strong>g yourself because you are not<br />

responsible for his/her moods, you are not<br />

his/her punching bag, there is nothing that<br />

you could do to make them stop being an<br />

abuser except leaving them.<br />

Because of the way the relationship has been<br />

built in your <strong>min</strong>d, the abuser’s first trick is<br />

to make you feel worthless and small.<br />

By picking up on your smallest mistake or<br />

imagined mistakes, by calling you worthless,<br />

by telling you repeatedly that you are not<br />

good enough and that they are putting up<br />

with you. An intimate relationship is so<br />

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sacred so there is a lot of trust that we place<br />

on our partners, so when they start saying<br />

these things a part of us believes it.<br />

Don’t be scared of confrontation, the worst<br />

thing you can do is believe in the lies he/she<br />

is feeding you. Stand up for yourself, don’t<br />

be scared set your limits.<br />

If you feel like you are in danger, get help;<br />

reach out to someone who can get you out.<br />

If there isn’t danger then find a way and the<br />

strength within you to walk out the door<br />

because you are worth it.<br />

No matter what the other person has told<br />

you don’t forget that you are so special and<br />

deserve a chance at a happy life. So if you<br />

are in an abusive relationship right now, stop<br />

bla<strong>min</strong>g yourself and find a way out and let<br />

the healing begin.<br />

If you have just gotten out of an abusive<br />

relationship, then good on you because<br />

unlike what the outside world will say it<br />

is an extremely difficult thing to leave that<br />

kind of a relationship.<br />

The trick is to never forget who you are and<br />

what you’re worth. Though your abuser<br />

would have attempted to tear down your self<br />

worth don’t fall for it.<br />

You are an amazing person with so much<br />

potential; you are not what your abuser says<br />

you are. So stand up for yourself, fight for<br />

yourself and remember you will emerge as a<br />

victorious survivor not a victim.<br />

NAM reaffirms the importance of Biological Weapons Convention<br />

he Biological Weapons Convention<br />

(BWC), the first multilateral disarmament<br />

treaty banning the development, production<br />

and stockpiling of an entire category of<br />

weapons of mass destruction, was opened<br />

for signature on 10 April 1972. The BWC<br />

entered into force on 26 March 1975. As<br />

mentioned in the text of the Convention,<br />

the States Parties to this Convention are<br />

deter<strong>min</strong>ed to act with a view to achieving<br />

effective progress towards general and complete<br />

disarmament, including the prohibition<br />

and eli<strong>min</strong>ation of all types of weapons of<br />

mass destruction, and convinced that the<br />

prohibition of the development, production and<br />

stockpiling of chemical and bacteriological<br />

(biological) weapons and their eli<strong>min</strong>ation,<br />

through effective measures, will facilitate<br />

the achievement of general and complete<br />

disarmament under strict and effective<br />

international control.”<br />

BWC relies primarily on a network approach<br />

based on coordination with international,<br />

regional, and nongovernmental organizations<br />

and initiatives as well as other nonproliferation<br />

regimes in order to address the<br />

interconnected nature of biological threats<br />

in a holistic manner. Under the framework<br />

of the BWC, improved coordination would<br />

provide positive externalities for managing<br />

disease, whatever the cause. Such an<br />

approach ensures that resources are used<br />

optimally to provide benefits for many.<br />

Disarmament has been a key objective of the<br />

Non-Aligned Movement since its inception,<br />

The Movement has taken cognizance of the<br />

threats posed by biological and toxic weapons<br />

and thus has reiterated the significance of the<br />

BWC. NAM Member States that are party to<br />

BWC have reaffirmed that the possibility of<br />

any use of bacteriological (biological) agents<br />

and toxins as weapons should be completely<br />

excluded, and the conviction that such use<br />

would be repugnant to the conscience of<br />

humankind. They recognized the particular<br />

importance of strengthening the Convention<br />

through the resumption of the multilateral<br />

negotiations for a legally binding Protocol<br />

dealing with all Articles of the Convention,<br />

in a balanced and comprehensive manner,<br />

including through verification measures<br />

bearing in <strong>min</strong>d that the lack of such<br />

verification regime poses a challenge to the<br />

effectiveness of the Convention, and urged<br />

the party rejecting negotiations to reconsider<br />

its policy.<br />

NAM has reiterated the call to promote<br />

international cooperation for peaceful purposes,<br />

including scientific-technical exchange. The<br />

Movement has underlined the importance<br />

to maintain close coordination among the<br />

NAM States Parties to the Convention and<br />

highlighted that the BWC forms a whole and<br />

that, although it is possible to consider certain<br />

aspects separately, it is critical to deal with all<br />

of the issues interrelated to this Convention<br />

in a balanced and comprehensive manner.<br />

NAM Member States have been active<br />

participants in the Review Conferences on<br />

BWC. At the 17th NAM Summit held in<br />

Venezuela in 20<strong>16</strong>, NAM highlighted the<br />

key role of its Member States in the the<br />

adoption of the important decisions related<br />

to the implementation of Article X of the<br />

BWC, especially by emphasizing the need<br />

for enhancing international cooperation,<br />

assistance and exchanges in toxins, biological<br />

agents equipment and technology for<br />

peaceful purposes, bearing in <strong>min</strong>d the<br />

Action Plan on the implementation of<br />

Article X submitted by the NAM States<br />

Parties at the Sixth Review Conference, and<br />

the additional NAM States Parties proposal<br />

on a mechanism for the full, implementation<br />

of Article X of the Convention presented<br />

more recently.<br />

NAM has further encouraged the BWC<br />

States Parties to implement the Article X,<br />

as set forth in paragraphs 50-61 of the Final<br />

Document of the Seventh BTWC Review<br />

Conference. NAM has also welcomed the<br />

outcome of the Seventh Review Conference<br />

and in particular its decision to include<br />

cooperation and assistance as one of the<br />

Standing Agenda Items, with a particular<br />

focus on strengthening cooperation and<br />

assistance under Article X, as well as<br />

the Conference’s decision to establish a<br />

database system to facilitate requests for<br />

and offers of exchange of assistance and<br />

cooperation among States Parties, and the<br />

establishment of a Sponsorship Programme,<br />

funded by voluntary contributions from<br />

States Parties, in order to support and<br />

increase the participation of developing<br />

States Parties in the meetings of the intersessional<br />

programme in the framework of<br />

the BWC.<br />

NAM has reaffirmed that the respective<br />

mandates of this Convention and other<br />

international organizations should be respected,<br />

while utilizing the experiences of the<br />

relevant multilateral organizations dealing<br />

with human and animal health on issues that<br />

are of direct relevance to the Convention,<br />

and that no actions should be taken to<br />

under<strong>min</strong>e the convention and/or interfere<br />

with its mandate.<br />

(in arrangement with<br />

News from Non-Aligned World)<br />

www.iins.org<br />

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