White Light Magazine - Autumn 2018

e Beyond Suffering
were also long periods of exhaustion,
migraine headaches and falling asleep
several times throughout the day. I
would quite often wake up in a massive
sweat, as though I had just come out
of a sweat lodge. And in a true sense,
a purification process was happening,
initiated by the crisis of death followed
by a rebirthing phase. On some level,
however, all I wanted to do was sit in
front of the Television all day, veg out
and forget about everything for a while.
Becoming a couch potato sounded
good to me as an avoidance strategy,
but the Great Mystery had another
plan. So, there I am watching TV for
hours on end every day, and what
began to occur, to my dismay, was a
growing boredom with any TV program
that was showing. So on one particular
afternoon, without any intention, I
began gazing at the wall above the TV,
which very quickly transformed into
a spontaneous state of meditation. A
quality of serene emptiness, stillness
and peacefulness began to arise and
very tangibly so. After a number of
days of watching this, I noticed that it
didn't matter whether I gazed at the
TV or the wall, because this state was
neither dependent upon or deterred by
any external influence.
It became obvious that sitting quietly
with a single-pointed focus, yet relaxed
gaze, was an extraordinary key. The
more that this happened, from day to
day, my dedication to going deeper into
this, also grew. Having passed through
so much trauma and especially seeing
how the whole family was struggling
with different levels of suffering on any
given day, my dedication to understand
the human condition, was deepening
quickly. The "Peace that surpasseth
all understanding" meant more to me
than anything else, from that moment
onwards. Thus began a dedicated
and long winding road of recalibration,
adjustment, integration and devotion to
learning and being of service to others.
Yes, there was still suffering,
sometimes great suffering, but it now
had taken on a different meaning.
Countless insights and processes were
also being revealed for healing and
transformation and sometimes there
were unexpected moments of simple
transcendence. In those instances of
spontaneous deep peace, where was
the suffering?
The phrase "Deep Peace Beyond
Suffering" also implies that the peace
that lies within, arising from the depths
of our being, already is and always
will be 'Beyond Suffering'. More and
more I began to ask the question
"What is suffering, really?" More
and more over the years, I began to
realize that suffering is not necessarily
something to shy away from, but to see
and embrace it as the very bridge to
awakening ones potential. I began to
White Light Magazine
see suffering as meaning "to undergo
a journey".
To be in peace in any given moment,
especially when encountering an
intense conflict or crisis or enduring
severe trauma, maybe it is just a matter
of choosing to be wholeheartedly
devoted to knowing peace. Maybe it is
simply about choosing to be in peace
for the sake of being in peace . . .
now. You never know, but it could also
become an opportunity for dedicating
ones life to being an Ambassador of
Peace. It might just become a love
offering to all sentient beings, who are
either lost, stuck, trapped or imprisoned
by their life-style or living circumstance,
seemingly devoid of peace or little
thereof. We are in such times, that
with the world being in so much strife
on a Global scale, it is unavoidable
to not notice how unstable the world
is. More than ever, inner peace is an
absolute necessity for global peace
and protection of this sacred earth.
Om Shanti, Shivallah
15