Group-Analytic Contexts, Issue 81, September 2018

Newsletter – Autumn 2018 13
I felt so nurtured ....a quiet maternal presence making sure
we had food and drinks at regular intervals in a home perfect for the
purpose of our meeting together. I came with some excitement and
some trepidation; I surprised myself by feeling drawn to some people
I hadn’t expected to and slightly annoyed by others! This was all fine
as it shifted and evolved over time and was a great experience in
difference.
We could all relate to the usual old patterns of fears and
anxieties we bring into any new setting and how a group can provoke
such primitive behaviours and emotions but somehow the strength and
power of these wonderful women felt containing and safe enough to
speak and feel freely and know that whatever came up would be
managed and accepted and wanted as well as taken care of and
processed. I have missed being in a group for myself.
The paper was perfect to trigger off such a torrent of thinking
and feeling around the fluidity or rigidity of sex in the widest sense
and our sense of ourselves as alive changing people who wade through
the storms of our instincts and needs and endeavour to find sense and
relationships to shore us up.
I realised I am probably the least tolerant and the older I get
the more I am unable to bear some aspects of some people I don’t want
to understand anymore! Not sure what that means but it is something
I will contemplate.
I also came away grateful for knowing these people and
being part of something so special – what a privilege in the best sense
of the word!
I also realised I am a lucky person with a good life and
vibrant relationships which mean everything to me and nothing else
matters. Not only luck though – I have worked damn hard in therapy
for which I owe it my lifelong gratitude.
Here’s to the power of the Group and Thank you to the
wonder of the women!
***
Forethought: nine white middle-class, middle-aged women but
there’ll be differences.
Of course there were...... in our backgrounds, in how and
from where we’d started; in our families, from where they’d come.
We nine women knew each other well, some better than others. This
was the 4 th time together for most – in Kerry* (2014), Wiltshire (2015),
Hertfordshire (2017) and now here in London. In Wiltshire our