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Page 8A THE BEACON May 2019 By Merrill Hutchinson It’s dinner time, and you are getting ready to sit down to a nice, peaceful meal with the family. You’ve prepared a delicious meal that took time and effort. As you all sit down, you begin to serve little “Joey” by loading his plate with all this incredible food- pork roast, mashed potatoes, gravy, and corn. Suddenly you notice him rolling his eyes back into his head. “Joey, what’s the problem?” He responds by telling you that he doesn’t like this food because it tastes bad. You respond, “I will put a small amount of each item on your plate. You don’t have to eat a lot; just give it a try.” Joey: “No, I hate this stuff. I can’t eat this!” Mom: “Eat just a little, and you can have some dessert when you are finished.” Joey: “What’s for dessert?” Mom: “If you eat everything, you can have a little ice cream.” Joey: “I want ice cream now. I can’t eat this stuff!” The bickering goes back and forth between Mom and Joey. Mom is getting tired and frustrated and says: “If you just eat your meat you can have some ice cream.” Joey: “I don’t like the meat, can I just eat the potatoes?” Mom gets more frustrated and continues the back and forth with Joey. Finally, things have become so heated that Mom is yelling and Joey is crying. The food is getting cold, and the tension is so thick you could see it in the air. In all of her frustration, Mom throws her arms in the air and says, “I really don’t care what you Negotiating with your Child? eat!” The picture ends with Joey’s plate of food pushed to the side, and Joey holding a half gallon of ice cream as he digs in like a starved vulture. Mom and Dad, whether you realize it or not, if scenarios similar to the above occurs in your house, you are allowing your young child to engage in negotiating! Negotiation is a great thing when it is done correctly. Throughout my years of working with others, I’ve had many opportunities to walk through the negotiation process. I realized early on that for me to even think about entering into the negotiation process, several key understandings and beliefs had to be in place between the involved parties. If the understandings were not clear, it was better not even to entertain the process. Negotiations will only stand a chance at being successful if the process is standing on the following pillars. ● Mutual Respect ● Trust ● Good Faith and Intent ● Understanding and Belief in the Process ● Shared Values Whether purchasing a car or house, interviewing for a job, or settling a business deal, negotiations can be very rewarding and successful when they stand on the pillars mentioned above. Without these, the process will at best, fall short, or at worst, be disastrous and potentially harmful and costly to the involved parties. What does all of this have to do with negotiating with your child? On more than one occasion, I’ve had discussions with parents about negotiating with their children. I’ve even had several cases in which the parents were impressed that their elementary-aged child was becoming a skilled negotiator, and they applauded the process. Often the parents would state something to the effect of, “Hey, in my world, learning to be a strong negotiator is a valuable skill. Someday, it may make them a lot of money!” Yes, some truth can be found in this. However, in my experience, I would never want to negotiate with someone who did not work from the pillars previously mentioned. Mutual Respect, Trust, Good Faith and Intent, Understanding and Belief in the Process, and Shared Values. With that being said, I strongly encourage parents to avoid negotiating with their young children. Why may you ask? Let’s look at the typical child. Our kids are born and quickly develop into selfish beings. If you don’t believe me, hang around a two- or three-yearold for about thirty minutes. The terrible twos are terrible because children have become aware of themselves and how they interact with the world. Their little brains are excited to think about things they want and finding ways to get those things at any cost! Tantrums, crying, sibling rivalry, and attempts at negotiating are just part of a young child’s day. Our young children are not bad or evil for thinking of themselves first, but do not be fooled. Children are selfish by nature. The thought process to step outside of one’s own thoughts and desires and think about what someone else might be feeling or thinking is abstract. This process is slowly learned, and the brain has to develop and mature to be capable of doing such thinking. Why you may ask, don’t you trust your kids? My response is simply that I do not trust them, YET! Trust is something that must develop and grow. Furthermore, trust only occurs when people are working from a respected and shared value system. A child doesn’t know what is of value in a relationship until they are old enough to understand how a relationship works. I’ve had the excellent opportunity to work with thousands of kids. What I know to be true, is that no matter how good children are, they simply are not ready for high level or abstract thinking. An elementary-age child is still learning how to interact with others and how to combat the selfishness tendency that is hardwired into all of us. Watching kids on the playground is a perfect example. You will see them argue and bicker back and forth to the point that sometimes seems cruel. This cruelty comes out simply because a child is acting like a child- selfish. They want what they want no matter what you want. As part of the process of becoming a well-adjusted, successful adult, we must learn to temper our selfish hardwiring and learn essential relationship tools such as empathy, understanding, and effective communication. These skills may not seem difficult, but I believe that the lack of these skills is the reason for much of the conflict in our world today- politics, business, marriage, parenting, etc. Trouble comes when we revert to our selfish tendencies and presume our way is the only way. Let me suggest that we don’t negotiate with our children until they have learned and understand these essential pillars of negotiation by first learning the tools of empathy, understanding, and effective communication. These tools can be more difficult for some children to comprehend than others. As the parent, you want to teach these skills and then help them understand how they build strong, healthy relationships. If you want your child to grow up to be a successful, well-adjusted adult, please do not spend your time negotiating with your child. Instead, spend your time teaching and encouraging your children to understand the value of valuing others. Once you begin to have confidence in your child’s ability to value others, you will find yourself being more comfortable entering into the negotiation process. Not only will this help your child, but it will help all of the people your child becomes involved with as an adult. I don’t know about you, but I would call that a Win-Win DEAL! S The Lumin helps CPAP patients stay healthy and sleep better. Introducing CPAP Sanitizing System To learn more, contact: DeVille’s Lawrenceburg Medical Supply Pharmacy 401 W. Eads Parkway Suite 270 and Lawrenceburg, Medical Indiana Supply 47025 Phone 812-537-1798 / Fax 812-537-1837 401 W Eads Parkway, www.devillepharmacies.com Suite 270 Lawrenceburg, IN 47025 812-537-1798 812-537-1837 fax devillepharmacies.com The healthy choice in CPAP accessory disinfection with simple one-touch operation. Lumin is the easiest and fastest way to disinfect a CPAP mask, reservoir and other accessories. The Lumin uses UV-C light to safely sanitize and works with a disinfection cycle time of 5 minutes, no harmful ozone, and 99.9% kill rate for harmful bacteria, viruses, mold and fungus. It is the ideal system for daily sanitizing of your CPAP equipment. THE BEACON - Bringing our Community and Businesses Together.
May 2019 THE BEACON Page 9A A Local Hero, The Greatest Generation, A Small World By Maureen Stenger The bombing of Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941, thrust the United States into World War II. This global war lasted from 1939 to 1945. World War II is the deadliest conflict in history. Marked by The Holocaust, genocide and the bombing of Hiroshima great sacrifices were paid not only on the battlefield but also on the home front. Gas, food, and clothing were all rationed to help support the war effort. As their husbands and sons headed to foreign lands, women headed to the workforce in unprecedented numbers. Americans were resolute in their efforts, and life changed for all. One of those sons that headed to war was Albert Wagner, born and raised in Sunman, Indiana on October 22, 1921. Albert was drafted for World War II and served from 1942 to 1945. He was part of the Eighth Airforce, 446th Bombardment Group and was stationed in Bungay, England. The Eighth Airforce was a United States Army Forces combat air force involved in a vast area of heavy fighting across Europe, also known as the European Theater of World War II. The Eighth Airforce carried out targeted bombing raids and engaged in combat against enemy aircraft. Mr. Wagner served as a ball gunner, the gunner that is under the belly of the plane tasked with shooting down enemy fighters. Mr. Wagner was part of the squadron for the Consolidated B-24 Liberator American heavy bomber, Old-Faithful. The crew for Old-Faithful was manned by Sergeant Melvin Howard, Sergeant Albert Wagner, Sergeant Walter Nye, Sergeant Wayne Back, Sergeant John Keegan, Sergeant William Watkins, Lieutenant Clark Jensen, Lieutenant Henry Kingsbery, Lieutenant Willis Hause, and Lieutenant Edward Hanna. Old-Faithful had flak damage, ground anti-aircraft fire damage, from a prior mission and was being repaired, so the crew was assigned a different B-24 Bomber called Satan’s Sister. On April 27th, 1944 the crew was gearing up for their morning mission, which would be Mr. Wagner’s twenty-seventh mission. Shortly after take-off, an engine exploded. There were eight one thousand pound bombs on board the aircraft which kept them from gaining any altitude or speed. The crew began dumping their bombs. Unfortunately, one of the bombs exploded in the air and blew off the tail turret and damaged the control system. The plane then crashed near Diss, England in a field among a flock of sheep and caught fire. It had narrowly missed crashing into a village church and nearby homes. Villagers and farm laborers who heard the commotion came running and helped to pull four of the men from the wreckage. Satan’s Sister was loaded with ammunition; she could go up in flames at any moment. These brave men and women truly risked their lives helping the crew. Once the plane came to a rest, the right side of the wing had two fires burning. ALUTE TO THE MILITARY Airman Samantha P. Barrett U.S. Air Force Airman 1st Class Samantha P. Barrett graduated from basic military training at Joint Base San Antonio-Lackland, San Antonio, Airman Barrett Texas. The airman completed an intensive program that included training in military discipline and Air Force core values. Airmen who complete basic training also earn credits toward an associate in applied science degree through the Community College of the Air Force. Airman Barrett earned distinction as an honor graduate. Airman Barrett is the daughter of Stephanie Barrett of Brookville, Indiana. She is a 2016 graduate of Franklin County High School, Brookville. Airman Matthew K. Corlett U.S. Air Force Airman Matthew K. Corlett graduated from basic military training at Joint Base San Antonio-Lackland, San Antonio, Texas. Airman Corlett Airman Corlett is the son of Lisa and David Corlett of Harrison, Ohio. He is a 2018 graduate of William Henry Harrison High School, Harrison, Ohio. Airman Casey Schlotman U.S. Air Force Reserve Airman 1st Class Casey Schlotman graduated from basic military training at Joint Base San Antonio-Lackland, San Antonio, Texas. Airman Schlotman is the daughter of Denise and David Schlotman of Harrison, Ohio. She is a 2016 Airman Schlotman graduate of William Henry Harrison High School. Join us for a fun-filled day of great sales, food & live music. Big savings on trees, shrubs, perennials, pottery, garden flags and more. Enter to win a $100 Casey’s Gift Card! Register for our free Birds, Bees, & Butterflies seminar at CaseysOutdoor.com/events. 812-537-3800 • 21481 State Line Rd. Lawrenceburg, IN The Crew of Old-Faithful- standing from left to right: Sergeant Melvin Howard, Sergeant Albert Wagner, Sergeant Walter Nye, Sergeant Wayne Back, Sergeant John Keegan, Sergeant William Watkins. Kneeling: KIA Lieutenant Clark Jensen, KIA Lieutenant Henry Kingsbery, Lieutenant Willis Hause, Lieutenant Edward Hanna. (photo courtesy of Jamie Wagner Roope) Sergeant Walter Nye and Sergeant Wagner were only slightly hurt and immediately began trying to help their fellow crew members. Sergeant Wagner succeeded in pinching the fuel line, thus stopping the gas from flowing until help arrived. Sergeant Watkins, Sergeant Keegan, and Lieutenant Edward Hanna were pinned underneath the wreckage. Sergeant Wagner found Lieutenant and pilot Clark Jensen with his hand still on the wheel slumped over, unconscious. Help arrived, but sadly it was too late to save Lieutenant Jensen and Lieutenant Henry Kingsbery. One month after the crash, Sergeant Wagner was back to active duty. He continued serving his country until 1945. He returned to Indiana, where he and his wife, Evelyn raised five children, and Sergeant Wagner went to work for Hillenbrand for twenty years. Albert and 7247 State Road 46E Batesville, IN 47006 812.932.3300 Evelyn eventually retired and spent their winters in their second home in Port Charlotte, Florida. Albert passed away on December 16, 1992. Albert’s son, Jim, was researching the crew of The Old-Faithful which led him to find Idaho author, Jan Cline. Ms. Cline’s mother was married to pilot Clark Jenson who was killed in the crash. Ms. Cline is writing a series of books called, The American Dream Series. The third book is due out by the end of the year and will mention the plight of Satan’s Sister and all of the crew including Sergeant Wagner. Sgt. Wagner’s granddaughter, Jamie Roope, tells me “My entire family is really excited about this book! We cannot wait to see how Jan brings this story to life.” Perhaps that is how we honor The Greatest Generation, by keeping their stories alive for generations to come. TOPSOIL (Regular and Shredded) SHOP LOCAL and tell our advertisers you saw their ads in The BEACON! 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LEON: Older 2 story home all off Edgewood city utilities, newer high efficiency on Rd. the $75,000 first floor. furnace. Great location to hwy and SUNMAN: Full .87 basement building lot with available in Whitetail garage, deck, Run subdivision. utility schools, laundry summer facilities, kitchen, oversized enclosed attached back porch, other room upstairs $22,000 shed on a corner lot. $199,900 could be 3rd bed. $69,900 HARRISON: Beautiful 2.093 acre BRIGHT: 3 bed, 2.5 bath home lot on private drive off Edgewood on nearly 38 acres with exceptional WEISBURG: views of Tanner Level Valley, 12.31st acers LOGAN: with 2.89 over acre 600 wooded ft of road coun- LAND Rd. $60,000 flr MRB, 1st flr ldry, pond, covered try lot with all utilities available. rear frontage deck, wrap and around city water. front porch, Nearly $59,900 all is tillable. $109,900 We Need Listings! Have buyers for farmland! Dale Lutz Randy Lutz 800-508-9811
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