UnCagedPhoenix Magazine: July 2019

FEATURE ARTICLE
onnet 43 from Elizabeth Barrett
Browning’s The Sonnets from the
Portuguese is one of my favorite poems.
Her words capture the power and
strength of true love—all-inclusive and
all embracing. They let the reader know
that true love has no boundaries, is
unconditional and never dies.
“True love has no boundaries, is
unconditional and never dies.”
It was February 1990 and our second
pregnancy. I was pregnant with twin
girls and everybody was so excited.
We were due in June. Every chance my
oldest daughter got, she let everyone
know that she was going to be a big
sister. Everything was going well. My last
checkup was good.
A few days later, I just wasn’t feeling
well. My husband (at the time) was
going out with the guys that night. I
remember asking him to stay home
because I just felt like something wasn’t
right. Several hours into the night, I
went into premature labor. My mother
met us on the way to the hospital so she
could take my then 2-year-old daughter
while we rushed to the hospital. This just
couldn’t be happening. My doctor met
us there and I was immediately placed
on medication to try to stop the labor.
On February 24, 1990, I gave birth to twin
girls at 25 and 6/7th weeks. There were
complications. Baby girl B was born one
hour after baby girl A. I began to feel
myself fading. I heard what I thought
was running water. It wasn’t running
water, I was hemorrhaging. Three days
later, I was planning the graveside
service of baby girl B. My little Brianna.
Any complication that a premature baby
could experience, she did. She passed
away in my arms.
I remember it like it was yesterday...
They wheeled me down, placed her in
my arms and my husband and I said
our goodbyes. No longer hooked up to
monitors and tubes, my little Brianna
looked up at me. As I held her close to
my heart, I told her it was ok to go. I
told her that the angels and my family
that were already there would take care
of her until we could see her again. At
that moment, she smiled at me and took
her last breath…right there in my arms.
No more suffering for my baby girl. My
faith in God let me know she was going
to be just fine. I thanked God for sharing
Brianna with us for those 3 days.
As the years went by, I began to have
a recurring dream. In my dream there
was a picnic set in a beautiful park. My
maternal grandparents were there
along with my baby girl Brianna. She
was crawling around on a blanket. My
grandmother and grandfather would
always look back at me and smile as if to
say, “Don’t worry. She’s good. We’re here
with her.” Upon my husband’s father’s
passing, as well as his grandparents
passing, they too became a part of the
recurring dream.
When my father passed, I would see
shadows in the form of him, especially
during the times I set aside for my
meditation. I would often talk to my Dad
when I was going through. I would say,
“Dad, I know you are interceding for me.
10 UnCagedPhoenix