Issue 113 / April-May 2021
April-May 2021 issue of Bido Lito! magazine. Featuring: PIXEY, AYSTAR, SARA WOLFF, DIALECT, AMBER JAY, JANE WEAVER, TATE COLLECTIVE, DEAD PIGEON GALLERY, DAVID ZINK YI, SAM BATLEY, FURRY HUG, FELIX MUFTI-WRIGHT, STEALING SHEEP and much more.
April-May 2021 issue of Bido Lito! magazine. Featuring: PIXEY, AYSTAR, SARA WOLFF, DIALECT, AMBER JAY, JANE WEAVER, TATE COLLECTIVE, DEAD PIGEON GALLERY, DAVID ZINK YI, SAM BATLEY, FURRY HUG, FELIX MUFTI-WRIGHT, STEALING SHEEP and much more.
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ARTISTIC<br />
LICENCE<br />
This issue’s selection of creative<br />
writing is by Lyndsay Price, a<br />
collection of works that channel<br />
the discovery in loss.<br />
Lyndsay Price is a co-host of A Lovely Word and curator<br />
of Salt Water Poetry.<br />
@lyndsaywritespoems<br />
lost things<br />
have you ever loved someone so much you let them leave?<br />
let them sidestep out of your life ever so seamlessly?<br />
i wish i could quote emily dickenson and say i wish you a kinder sea<br />
but, like leather and teeth,<br />
some things in this world just aren’t meant to be that sweet<br />
ultimately we’re both worthy of being loved properly<br />
but i’ll tell you this, you could have had all of my poetry<br />
for now i’ll remember you howling with wine in your blood<br />
and a full moon in your heartbeat<br />
in many ways i feel like you saw the woman i could be<br />
but we’re on different pages, books, bookcases<br />
even different libraries<br />
i’m a mile up in the sky and you’re a thousand kisses deep<br />
ultimately we’re just superheroes with a lot of anxiety<br />
so it’s time to move on, take advice from the animal kingdom<br />
and snap the necks of the young who won’t make it<br />
cause our situation is certainly not the time for us to be squeamish<br />
so today i took a breath, today i divorced my ghosts,<br />
today i performed an exorcism on the very depths of my soul<br />
but because of you, i’m learning to leave myself love notes<br />
because of you i no longer see my body as a hand grenade<br />
despite the fire that’s in your eyes, you taught me to feel safe<br />
to move forwards, i’d say to get your hands dirty with life and<br />
consume more of the things that fill you<br />
but to close up wounds that cut this deep,<br />
well that’s not something you can rush through<br />
my mother tells that i need to know this world is tough<br />
now i look both ways when i cross the road because darling,<br />
this was dangerous enough<br />
and does anyone know the exact difference in which two magnets<br />
can no longer feel an attraction?<br />
because i’ve tried trains and hotel rooms and i can still feel you<br />
i’ve tried not talking on the telephone but i can still hear you<br />
i know when you’ve had a bad day<br />
because the sky looks dark and thundery<br />
and i know when you’ve had a good day<br />
because the trees genuinely smile at me<br />
i’m not entirely sure how you’re controlling the weather around me,<br />
but i don’t question it because i know this life is full of mystery<br />
i’ve tried salt baths for days<br />
but my bones won’t stop repeating your name<br />
teaching my body to forget about you is a full time job these days<br />
tell me this:<br />
does your car sometimes circle my house<br />
the way my thoughts trace the outline of your name?<br />
does your finger hover over the bell<br />
the way mine hovers over deleting your name from my phone book?<br />
when you give in and drive back home,<br />
tell me darling, do you feel lonesome?<br />
last night i went to bed with artificial feelings,<br />
woke up with a coca-cola heart<br />
but despite me lying to myself,<br />
the truth is that i love you and i’m sorry if it seemed like i forgot<br />
for now, i want to say goodbye in the sweetest way<br />
because i can be good at staying gone<br />
i wish you a lifetime of butterflies<br />
i’ll forever have a sunshine heart<br />
to quote aa. milne,<br />
how lucky i am to have something<br />
that makes saying goodbye so hard<br />
the search<br />
i overturned stones,<br />
moss side facing up<br />
i shouted your name into the creek<br />
i lit a cigarette<br />
and let the smoke curl into the sky<br />
leaving me to wonder<br />
if you had ever even been<br />
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