TravelWorld International Magazine, Winter 2021 - The Magic of the Holidays

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y day, the ‘A Christmas
Story’ House is a
museum to movie magic,
located in Cleveland’s
Tremont neighborhood.
The mustard-yellow clapboard
house with green trim looks
like many of the modest century
homes on the city’s west side, but
it’s the only one selected as the
Parker family home in the 1983
classic holiday film ‘A Christmas
Story.’ Fans of the film come
from all over the country and
globe armed with every detail of
the film’s plot when they wander
through on a tour. They fire off
its memorable lines as easily as
protagonist Ralph (“Ralphie”)
Parker could have shot an eye out
with his Red Ryder BB gun. Some
of the museum staff and docents
can tell you what they were doing
when the film crew came to town
in the early 1980s. They may have
been extras in the parade scene or
perhaps they waited hours in line
to see Santa Claus at Higbee’s, a
now-defunct department store in
downtown Cleveland.
Few people, however, can say
they’ve spent the night in the
museum surrounded by artifacts
from the 1940s-era movie. When
superfan Brian Jones bought the
house overlooking Cleveland’s steel
mills sight unseen in 2006, he could
not have imagined people lining up
Above: It’s a bit
surreal playing board
games under the
light of the infamous
leg lamp in the
living room of the
‘A Christmas Story’
House. Once the
tours are finished for
the day, overnight
guests have the run
of the place.
Left: The narrator
of the film, ‘A
Christmas Story,’
takes us back to
his childhood in the
late 1930s and his
burning desire for a
Red Ryder Carbine
Action 200-Shot,
Range Model Air
Rifle.
around the block to visit the house,
let alone pay thousands of dollars to
spend the night on Christmas Eve.
But once the holiday spirit strikes,
the house becomes a mecca for
America’s most-watched holiday
movie and the calendar fills up with
overnight bookings.
y family decided to pull the
trigger and book an afterhours
visit to the famous film
location in the off season,
which starts at a much more
reasonable $495 midweek
between April and October. A
third-floor loft with kitchen, living
room, bathroom and one bedroom becomes our
personal refuge during regular museum hours,
but once the tourists leave, we have the full run
of the house. We can even sleep in Ralphie’s and
Randy’s bedroom surrounded by antique toys and
children’s books from a bygone era—all of which
can be played with.
Since my seven-year-old daughter had never seen
‘A Christmas Story’ before, I wondered what she
would think about the strange artifacts throughout
the Parker home. Like the many visitors before her,
she is naturally drawn to the infamous leg lamp
with its “soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the
front window.” She gets a good laugh when she
picks up the rotary-dial phone in the second-floor
hallway to hear Mrs. Schwarz’s verbal assault
on her son whom Ralphie wrongly accused of
teaching him the F-word—the “queen-mother of
dirty words.” In the bathroom, a bar of Lifebuoy
soap stands by to be Ralphie’s punishment for
using said F-word. I discourage Kinley from putting
the soap in her mouth, given it has bite marks on it
from a previous museum visitor.
The surreal experience continues as we hang out
in the living room and play board games under
the light of the leg lamp late that evening. The
Christmas tree gleams year-round in the corner of
the room with the Red Ryder BB gun propped up
by the fireplace. Even though the interior shots of
the Parker home were filmed on a soundstage in
Canada, the home was painstakingly remodeled
to closely match the set’s layout. At any moment,
I expect Ralphie to bound down the stairs like
a “deranged Easter bunny” wearing the pink
pajamas his Aunt Clara bought him. Instead, we’re
interrupted by a few of the film’s fans climbing the
porch stairs and peering in the front window to
get a peek. They are just as surprised as we are
when they realize we were inside looking back at
them. We took that interruption as our cue to head
upstairs to the loft apartment and call it a night.
Top to bottom:
Get an earful from Mrs.
Schwarz when you
pick up the second
floor hallway phone.
Read the hidden
message Ralphie
deciphers with a Little
Orphan Annie Secret
Circle decoder pin in
the bathroom.
Reenact the scene
in which Randy took
refuge under the
sink when he was
sure their father was
going to kill his older
brother.
Sleep in Ralphie
and Randy’s room,
surrounded by vintage
books and old-school
entertainment.
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