Mental Balance Feb 2022 Issue 1

Welcome
to our new
Beginning

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welcome to Mental Balance Magazine Series, this
avant-garde publication is committed to educate, inspire
and encourage you to take care of your wellbeing. With a lot of
research, each issue covered contains accurate, beautifully-presented,
easily assimilated information, about all aspects of mental health. Covering
everything from prevention and diagnosis, treatments and rehabilitation,
to workplace initiatives and financial and legal advice, we
endeavor to be at the forefront of driving forward positive changes in
how we handle our mental wellbeing.
We aim to provide comprehensive health and wellness information
designed to help you navigate the ultra-challenging day to day mental
stressors. This magazine is entertaining and inspiring of course! It will
provide invaluable information, as well as offering a platform for opinion
and discussions, with up-to-date news of research and development,
and a place where you can share your personal experiences with
others.
Our objective is to provide informative, inspiring and topical stories
about mental health and wellbeing. We aim to break the stigma of
mental health in our society, and shine light on the positivity and
support that should be available for everyone, no matter their situation.
By working together, we will honestly transform the way we think, feel
about mental wellbeing, and give it the status it deserves.
The magazine will be available online and in print on request. Remember
to subscribe to our newsletter to get to know whenever we post
something. More so, you can follow us on all social media handles as
we are there to boost your confidence, self-esteem, and improve social
inclusion through delivering quality content that embraces the core
pillars of living your best life, which is mental health.
Special thanks to all our contributors, local talented photographers
and researchers who came obord to share their incredible knowledge.
Mental Balance Team
A health mind is an assert

Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe
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Editor’s Note
Looking after our mental health and well-being is important at any time, but right
now, it feels more crucial than ever. The past lockdown years have been immensely
challenging to everyone. Every single one of us has been affected by COVID-19 in
some way, and the unprecedented disruption to day-to-day life, as we know it, is
taking its toll — mentally and physically. Adjusting to the new norm of wearing
masks, sanitizing and being vaccinated have not been easy lately with the anxiety
that the social media brought about the vaccine. It has been a trying time for everyone
and still a long way to go as we always ask ourselves questions such as,” will the
world ever return to normalcy or this is the new norm.”
It has been difficult to balance work and home life, as there is not a clear cut line
or distinction between work hours and time to relax, and for those working from
home and having to deal with children at the same time. Not to mention our dear
brothers and sister who are self-employed “Vanongwavha ngwavha” and live from
hand to mouth, not working meant everything stops.
One thing that has helped keep some of us motivated during this challenging time
is our mission: Providing trustworthy, accurate health news and information to help
you, our readers, live your healthiest lives. This is more important than ever. We
need to come out of this pandemic better positioned mentally.
We’ve come up with this mental health magazine to spread awareness and better
ways of dealing with mental challenges. As you will see, everyone’s mental health is
important as we discuss about things that affects our day to day activities, these are
the thigs that are with us all the times.
While uncertainty remains, we will be giving you new things to enrich your mind all
the times, so remember to follow us and subscribe to receive newsletter all the
times.
From all of us here at Mental Balance Series, stay safe and enjoy
your magazine.
Tonderai Masara, Editorial Director

Life Mend
Family Therapy
Improving Your Emotional Well Being.
Quality Care You Can Count On.
Are you struggling with issues related to trauma, grief, addiction, anxiety, or major
life changes? There comes a time when help is needed from a certified professional
to cope with many of life’s challenges. I’m a licensed Mental Health Service
Provider in Harare, Zimbabwe and I’m here to support you on your journey
toward healing and self-discovery.
OUR SERVICES
Family Therapy
Couples Therapy
Individual Therapy
Group Therapy
Teen/ Adolescents Therapy
Corporate Therapy
-Strategic consulting
-Learning and development
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GET IN TOUCH
VISIT US
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CONTENTS
8 Editor’s Note
10 We are not silent about Mental Health,
but are you listening
12 Zeroing in on Mental Health
14 Sustainable Mental Health Provision
Options For Zimbabwe
18 Happy Month of Love
20 BEHAVIOURS THAT SQUASH OUT
ALL THE LOVE (COUPLES)
22 Community Mental Health
Mental
Balance
24 Mental Stressors Associated with Certain
Life Stages and Events
26 Loss & Grief
28 WOMEN’S MENTAL HEALTH
Picture Proudly by
pixelgraphy zimbabwe
30 FAMILY TIME
32 Children’s Mental Health

Visit the leading regulatory authority today to be registered
ALLIED HEALTH PRACTITIONERS' COUNCIL OF ZIMBABWE
The Allied Health Practitioners Council of Zimbabwe (AHPCZ or Council) is a regulatory body
established by the Health Professions Act (Chapter 27:19). Its mandate is to regulate, control and supervise
all matters affecting the training of persons in, and the manner of the exercise of, the professions and
callings specified in the Health Professions Act (Chapter 27.19). Council provides regulatory frameworks
and standards of practice to allied health professionals for quality healthcare delivery in Zimbabwe and
beyond. This is done mainly by issuing practicing certificates to practitioners that have the minimum
requirements to practice. The professions that we regulate are as follows :
1. Ambulance Technicians
2. Clinical Assistants
3. Clinical Social Workers
4. Counsellors
5. Dieticians
6. Electrocardiogram Technicians
(ECG)
7.Electroencephalographic
Technicians (EEG)
8. Emergency Medical Technician (EMT)
9. Health Education Promotion Officers
10.Hospital Equipment Technicians
11.Hospital Food Service Supervisors
12.Medical Physicists
13.Health Information Management
14.Nutritionists
15. Operating Theatre
Technicians
16. Paramedics
17. Psychologists
18. Radiographers
19. X-ray Operators
20. Ultrasonographers
The Council notes of an increase in demand of mental health services in the country. This has however seen
the rise of people who are offering service of registered practitioners yet they are not registered. Therefore,
the Council wishes to advise the public to avoid using these people. This is illegal and warrants either a fine,
imprisonment or both as Health Professionals should be registered.
Feel free to check your practitioners registration status with us on
www.ahpcz.co.zw or contact info@ahpcz.co.zw or call 0242 303027.
AHPCZ, safeguarding the public, regulating professions

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Mental Balance Series

We are not silent about
Mental Health, but are
you Listening?
Remember there is no template for everyone as each
person is different and we all live in varying circumstances.
However, regardless of age, location or gender,
amongst other factors let’s live each day together. Let us
chat / talk about mental health using available media
including physical interaction, social media, telephone
etc. No matter how small the conversation will be, it is a
worth a while step towards “normalizing” mental health
conversation in our society. We have put down some
ways to do it below;
Ways to Normalize the Mental Health
Conversation
1. Talk Openly About Mental Health
It is perfectly normal to talk to friends, family, and
coworkers about seeing a doctor if you have the flu or a
broken leg. Why not do the same when you are going to
visit a therapist because you are depressed? For how
long shall we keep it under wraps and perpetuate the
notion that mental illness is a taboo while we suffer
silently as a society? Just be direct and non-hesitant and
together we can change our narrative.
2. Educate Yourself and Others
Do your own research about mental illness and share
that information with others. Most of us know the
differences between physical ailments such as a cold, a
sprain, cancer, etc. We don't refer to them under
Picture by Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe
Let’s start the conversation about mental health.
We can do this and we should create support-
ive communities by having conversations with family,
friends, or colleagues about mental health. By talking
about it, we can support ourselves and others. Most
people at some point feel worried, stressed or even
down about things that are going on in their lives. There
are a number of factors in life that can have an impact
on our mental health. These factors can either pose a
risk to, or protect, your mental health and wellbeing.
a singular umbrella term "physical illness." Similarly,
there are various types of mental illnesses, each with
their own unique symptoms and behaviors. Sharing
information eliminates misconceptions that contribute
to stigma.
3. Be Conscious of Language
Mental health conditions are often used negatively as
adjectives, which is problematic (for example). Try to
be conscious of the words you use to describe people,
things, and behaviors that you think are different.
4. Symptoms of Mental Illness
Each mental illness is different, though some have overlapping
symptoms. There are some warning signs
10 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022

that could indicate a need to see a medical
or mental health professional. These
early warning signs include:
1. Confused thinking or problems
concentrating
2. Extreme mood changes
3. Avoiding friends and social activities
4. Changes in sleeping habits
5. Multiple physical ailments without
obvious causes
6. Thinking about suicide
7. Inability to handle daily activities
8. Eating or sleeping too much or too
little
9. Abusing alcohol, drugs, or tobacco
10. Fighting more with friends and
family
11. Considering harming yourself or
others
12. Feeling fatigued with low or no
energy
13. Feeling apathetic
14. Feeling hopeless or helpless
15. Feeling sad or irritable for long
periods of time
16. Experiencing excessive amounts of
anger, anxiety, confusion, fear, forgetfulness,
and worry
17. Experiencing extreme mood swings
that negatively impact relationships
18. Experiencing unexplained physical
pain
19. Hearing voices or having delusional
thoughts
21. Withdrawing from other people
and social activities
22. Being unable to do your daily tasks
Feeling Suicidal?
What does it mean to
feel suicidal?
Thoughts of suicide can happen in the context of .mental illness, but
they can also be triggeredby stressors that exceed the capacity of
currently available coping strategies. You are not alone in experiencing
thoughts of suicide. And as hard as it can be to talk about it, silence only
makes it worse.. The current COVID-19 pandemic has led to unprecedented
changes in most people's lives. But there are things that can help.
Suicidal Ideation
Suicidal ideation is the psychiatric term used for thoughts about suicide.
Those kinds of thoughts can show up in a few different ways such as:
1. not wanting to live, but not really thinking about dying
2. feeling like you'd be better off dead, but not thinking about doing
anything to speed that along (also known as passive suicidal ideation)
3. thinking about specifics of how to kill yourself, e.g. how, when, and
where (active suicidal ideation)
Once you get to the point of active suicidal ideation and thinking of specifics,
it's really important to get help.
Where to get help
There are a few different avenues for getting help.
Fanily/friends
These people can offer emotional support, but they may not know how to
deal with suicidality.
Online resources & apps
There are websites and apps that allow you to create safety plans. These
probably won't be enough on their own if you're really in crisis. You'll find
ideas on our website as we have Find a therapist page.
Crisis lines/chats
These are manned by trained volunteers.
Mental health professionals
This may be your treatment team, your GP, Thearpist or the
hospital emergency department.
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 11

Zeroing in on Mental Illness
“Self-care is how you take your power back.”
Caring for our mind is as important as caring for our
body. The first step is understanding that mental health
and wellbeing is important for everyone. Even you!
What is Mental Health?
Mental health is a state of well-being that encompasses the emotional,
psychological, and social aspects of our lives. It affects how we
think, feel, and act as we cope with life. It also determines how we
handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Mental health is
important at every stage of life, from childhood and adolescence
through to adulthood and aging. You should probably be asking
yourself why we need to know about mental health. It is because
mental health is just as essential as physical health. Normalizing the
conversation about mental health empowers you to talk and get the
help they need.
Why mental Illness? Is it spiritual or all about
biology and genes?
From evil spirits, brain abnormalities, genes to chemical imbalances
in the body, numerous factors have been put forward to explain why
people experience mental health challenges. Research on this
subject matter is still underway as the
12 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022
world seeks to fully understand this
phenomenon.
In almost all cases, our genes do nothing
more than carry a slight risk of mental
illness. What really matters is the wide range
of social, economic, family and emotional
factors that interact with our genes and
biology. False beliefs about mental illness
can have serious consequences for affected
individuals. The human psyche is a fragile
thing, and just like the body, it is subject to a
host of malaises. There is plenty of evidence
to suggest that mental disorders are quite
common, affecting one in five adults in any
given year and across the population, in the
UK. Approximately 1 in every 25 adults is
living with a serious mental health problem
such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, or
major depression and these statistical figures
could have doubled given the drastic impact
of the Covid pandemic on lives during the
past two years.
Not being able to share their feelings is one
of the most serious challenges encountered
by mental health patients. The creation of
conducive spaces for people to openly talk
about mental health can go a long way in
breaking down stereotypes, improving
relationships, aiding recovery and eradicating
the stigma surrounding mental health
illness.
What is the Relationship between Mental and
Physical Health?
Mental health and physical health should not be thought
of as separate. There are various ways in which poor
mental health has been shown to be detrimental to physical
health and vice versa. For example, people with
depression have a 40% higher risk of developing heart
diseases than the general population as shown by
research. The second leading cause of death among
individuals between the ages of 10 and 34 is suicide.
Mental illness and substance use disorders result in 1 out
of every 8 emergency room visits by adults.
Why Talk about Mental Health?
Allow me to quickly point out that by not talking about
mental health issues, we add to the stigma that surrounds
this topical issue. Mental illness is treatable, and individuals
suffering from the same can and do live fulfilling,
productive, and happy lives. But the longer the mental
health condition go untreated, the more severe it
becomes. Find below some of the many combined
reasons why we should talk about mental health.

1. To Combat Mental Health Stigma
Despite the growing focus on mental health worldwide,
there is still a lot of stigma associated with
mental illness. The stigma surrounding this form
of illness can prevent us from recognizing when
we need to reach out for help. Talking openly
about mental health issues, including mental
illness, can help break down these barriers.
Discussions help us understand just how common
mental illness is, providing us with opportunities
to correct misconceptions and feel better about
asking for help.
2. To Understand You are Not Alone
It is paradoxical that as the world amplifies its
voice on mental health, it suddenly appears that
recorded cases of mental health illness are spiraling
more than ever. This can be regarded as a sign
that people are now more openly talking about
their mental challenges and it should inspire us to
do the same and confidently seek for assistance
whenever necessary. Watch out you may be the
only one left behind in this race towards the
achievement of good health and well-being in line
with Sustainable Development Goal Number 3.
Remember being mentally sick does not mean
you are weak. If we talk more about mental
health, it could encourage more people to seek
treatment.
3. To Encourage Care and Support
Talking about mental health in general encourages
people to seek treatment, especially once they
realize that they are not alone. Millions of adults
live with mental health issues in Zimbabwe considering
the dire mental health professional, patient
ratio, and the more we talk about it, the more
likely we will begin to feel comfortable to seek
care and support as a society. Just like the country’s
approach to demystifying HIV and AIDS
during the 1990s into the 2000s, let us tackle this
scourge of mental health illness through publicity
and awareness.
breakdown the stigma surrounding mental illness and inform people of
available care and support options. It can even encourage those having
suicidal thoughts or dealing with severe mental illness to reach out to
others for help.
5. To Maintain Good Mental Health
Maintaining one’s mental well-being is an important part of staying
healthy and enjoying an improved quality of life. Discussing mental
health can overally encourage people to maintain their mental well-being
on a regular basis. These formal or informal discussions could include
tips or information on how to boost or care for one’s mental health and
well-being and types of mental health challenges and how to manage
them, amongst other key issues.
Pictures done by Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe, Contact them for
your best exprience
4. To Lower the Risk of Suicide
It is saddening to learn that someone has given up
on life by committing suicide. l always feel that if
someone had quickly reached out to listen to their
problems maybe the outcome could have been
different. It can be observed that more often than
not, interventions are always delayed only to be
offered as an emergency stop-gap measure. Yet
openly discussing mental health at societal level
can help
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 13

SUSTAINABLE MENTAL HEALTH PROVISION
OPTIONS FOR ZIMBABWE
Dr Herbert Zirima is a practising psychologist and a senior lecturer in the School of Medical & Health Sciences
at Great Zimbabwe University. He writes here in his personal capacity.
There is a surge in the need for
mental health services globally
and locally.This can be partly attributed to
the Covid 19 disturbances and a rise in
drug and substance abuse. The mental
health service provision system in Zimbabwe
is currently under strain as it is not only
largely unavailable, but heavily relies on an
unsustainable pharmacological approach
which is under-staffed and under-resourced.
This article presents sustainable
mental health provision options for Zimbabwe
and other developing countries.
1. Policy reform
There is an urgent need for policy reform
in order to fully integrated mental health
within the primary health care system and
public institutions. Primary health care is
the foundation for high-quality and sustainable
mental health care. According to the
World Health Organisation (2009), the
integration of mental health services into
primary care includes the following: identification
and treatment of mental disorders,
referral to other levels where required,
attention to the mental health needs of
people with physical health problems, and
mental health promotion and prevention.
Where mental health is integrated into
primary care, access is improved, mental
disorders are more likely to be identified
and treated, and comorbid physical and
mental health problems managed in a
seamless way. To be fully effective and
efficient, primary mental health care must
be complemented by additional levels of
care, (WHO, 2009). These include
secondary care components to which
primary health workers can turn for referrals,
support, and supervision. Linkages to
informal and community-based services are
also necessary.
This integration will entail that the training of
counsellors and psychologists is embedded in
the health system. The students should be part
of the system and should get paid during training.
Fully trained psychologists should be
engaged in all health care facilities and public
institutions to offer training and mental health
services. Besides health care facilities,
psychologists, clinical social workers and counsellors
should be engaged in public schools,
district education offices, prisons, colleges and
other public institutions.
The integration of non-pharmacological
mental health options into primary health care
facilities is a sustainable approach to the
prevention, treatment and management of
mental illness as these primary health care
facilities are within reach of most people.
Moreover, currently there is relatively high
number of non-pharmacological practitioners
who are fully trained and some still under
training who can provide the services. The
availability of these practitioners entails that
the approach will be sustainable.
2. Investment in non-pharmacological
mental health service provision
A sustainable approach to provision of mental
health entails the engagement of treatment
plans that are affordable to the government.
Currently, there is an over-reliance on pharmacological
treatment plans which are not
only largely unavailable to the majority of
citizens but also too expensive to both the
government and individuals. Therefore,
government should invest in non-pharmacological
mental health service provision.This
can be partly done by employing psychologists
14 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022

and counsellors within the primary
health care system and public institutions.
Zimbabwe’s mental health
system is currently unsustainable as
it is relying on a poorly resourced
pharmacological approach hinged
on only four psychiatric centres and
very few psychiatrists and psychiatric
nurses. The system currently
does not seem to give any serious
recognition to non-pharmacological
practitioners who include psychologists,
counsellors, occupational
therapists and clinical social workers.
Additionally, the need for
investment in tools of the trade such
as psychometric instruments which
are necessary for screening and
diagnosis of mental disorders
cannot be overemphasised.
3. Absorption of students
at tertiary education level
into the mainstream
health sector
The government should absorb
clinical and counselling psychology
interns into the health sector as a
matter of urgency. The proposal is
that every Psychiatric Hospital
should have at least ten (10) interns,
every Provincial Hospital to have at
least five (5) interns and at least one
intern psychologist for every District
Hospital. This arrangement will
entail the engagement of fully registered
psychologists at all the stated
hospital to ensure proper supervision
of the interns.
4. A Psychologist for every
school
The school system represents a greater
chunk of the population of Zimbabwe
therefore, a point of need for
mental health care services. In that
regard, it is necessary to ensure that
educational psychologists are
engaged at every public school.
Currently, only some private schools
are engaging psychologists at their
schools and public schools access
psychologists at the provincial level.
5. Awareness
There is need to raise awareness on
causes and treatment of mental
illnesses so as to deal with the stigma
currently associated with mental
illnesses in our communities. To this
end, psychologists, counsellors and
social workers should be engaged on
a full-time basis.
You Are
Not
Alone
Because of the stigma attached to
mental illness, it’s often hard for
those struggling and their families
and friends to talk about what they’re
going through. But help is available,
and it works.
Mental Balance is providing a
platform to those who are struggling
with mental challenges to reach out
to us. There are people who can
help if you come out of your shell.
You can write to us today, a short
story you tell can be the difference
that lets someone know that they are
not alone.
YOU ARE NOT
ALONE
We hope that you will join us in giving a
voice to a struggle that millions of
people face every day.
We’re here to inspire people to express
themselves and find help if they need it.
As a result, bad language, violent imagery
and other offensive and explicit material
are off-limits.
yu can use the contact form on website
or info@mentalbalanceseries.com
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 15

SAY NO TO SUBS

TANCE ABUSE

Happy
Month
of
Love
Pictures by
Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe
“I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship.” — Amy March
t is that time of the year again,
soon after dealing with the Ifestive season’s overspending
during the month of January, you
now have to celebrate recovery in
style with your loved ones. Yes,
February, the month of love epitomized
by the 14th day of the
month, the Valentine’s Day is here.
But will this year’s Valentine’s Day
be the same again after celebrating
this conspicuous occasion under
the Covid pandemic induced lockdowns
during the past two years.
Your guess is as good as mine!
There is no way you can ignore this
day given the high level of attention
it receives from both the mainstream
and social media. This year
we have already witnessed Tiktok
videos in circulation wherein
people are singing, “Valentines is
coming, who is your boyfriend or
girlfriend.” It is pertinent to note
that love is not the only emotion
18 Mental Balance Feb 2022 issue 1
amplified around Valentine’s Day. To
many people the Valentine’s Day
brings up feelings of depression, low
self-esteem /self-worth and loneliness.
The media’s hype around the
Valentine’s Day makes it difficult to
escape these feelings. At Mental
Balance we believe that your mental
health is your greatest assert and looking
after your mental health is of
critical importance.
Love greatly affects our mental health.
The Mental Balance Series has decided
to give you a run-down of the
impact of love on your life as a
Valentine’s Day present. This is dedicated
to those in marriage, relationships
and the no-strings-attached
relationship types. Additionally,
individuals who have openly shared
their mental struggles and those that
are still gathering enough courage to
do so are welcome to partake in this
special gift.
A healthy and loving relationship is
not only a cushion against poor
mental health, but can also be a
major source of support to those
undergoing treatment for mental
illness. Love and positive social
support increase feelings of happiness
and reduce stress, anxiety, and
depression. Being loved improves
self-worth and feelings of being
valued, which in turn expedites the
healing process. Involvement of
loved ones during treatment can also
help strengthen relationships and
improve adherence and outcomes of
mental health patients. Let us keep
this in mind and always try to be
there for our loved ones and people
we care about.
1. Love + a Healthy
Relationship = Happiness
While love is not an all-round cure
for mental illness, it is true that being
in love and having a supportive

spouse, partner and a healthy
intimate relationship promotes
happiness. A happy, stable relationship,
whether with a spouse or
partner, is connected to better
mental health. It cannot go without
mention that being in a bad relationship
can worsen your mental health.
An unstable or unhealthy relationship
with your partner can destroy
your self-esteem, increase your
stress, anxiety, and depression levels
and even trigger thoughts of suicide.
You are therefore, encouraged to be
happy always and be number one
cheer leaders of your partners for
the benefit of their mental health.
2. Being Loved Promotes
Self-Worth.
It is always normal to seek for
self-validation from other people,
for instance your marriage partner.
Feeling loved indeed adds to one’s
sense of self-worth. Knowing that
someone loves you means that you
matter, that you have value, and that
someone would be devastated if you
were gone. Thus, let us strive to
show each other love everyday
verbally and other actions. Some of
us lost ourselves in the lockdowns
and we are thankful of the partners,
family and children who have been
there for us. We all need encouragement
during “dark” and emotional
times. It can be difficult to see
your value, especially in the despair
of depression or suicidal thoughts.
But having someone who loves you
can be the lifeline you just need.
3. It’s the type of Social
Support not the quantity that
benefits Mental Health
The benefits of relationships are not
restricted to romantic connections.
Social support in any form has been
proven over and over again to be
good for mental health. Studies
show that the quality of social
support is much more important
than quantity. In other words,
it’s better to have one or two strong
social connections than a large
network of acquaintances. Teach
your children to be good companions
so that when you grow old they will
provide you and your grandchildren
good company. Can you imagine
being surrounded by many cold
people in your old age!
Research shows that a good social
support network benefits mental
health in several ways:
1.Better resilience in the face of stress
2. Healthier lifestyle choices
3. Better life-long mental health
4. Improved self-esteem
5. Fewer negative effects of stress
4. A Healthy Relationship
Wires Healthy Habits.
If you are in a healthy and happy
intimate relationship, you are more
likely to adopt and stick with healthy
lifestyle choices. These include
eating well, exercising, and avoiding
substance abuse. All of these physical
health habits promote good
mental health. Your relationship
may even encourage you to engage
in more positive mental health
habits, like opening up about your
feelings and engaging in productive
conflict resolution.
Focus on encouraging healthy habits
in each other for good mental
health. Find areas in which you can
both improve, such as drinking less
alcohol or getting adequate sleep.
Work on improving those habits
together and you will see improvements
in mental health as well.
5.Self-Love
Practicing self-love can improve
your self-esteem, make you aware of
your strengths and allow you to
embrace your weaknesses. While
you might want to do things that feel
good or exciting, practicing self-love
means choosing to do the things that
keep you focused on your goals and
moving towards a healthier, happier
life. Allow yourself to say no to
things that wear you down and harm
you physically or emotionally. This
applies to your work, personal life,
relationships, and recreational activities.
Surround yourself with a
healthy support system that includes
people who respect your boundaries
and who will keep you accountable.
Also remember that, forgiving
ourselves can take a back seat when
we feel low or stressed, but this is a
significant step towards self-love. We
might forget that we need to forgive
ourselves just as much as we need to
forgive others.
issue 1 Feb 2022 Mental Balance 19

BEHAVIOURS THAT SQUASH OUT ALL
THE LOVE (COUPLES)
11 Common Behaviours to
Avoid in Relationships
By Tatenda Chandengenda
Therapist/Counsellor
20 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022
Relationships are not easy to maintain.
It takes a lot of hard work and
endurance for two people to overcome
life’s rough patches together in
order to find common ground for
building a healthy and happy connection.
While this is possible for some,
other couples struggle in this endeavor.
Most people assume the easy and
quick fix approach to an unhappy or
toxic relationship - just leave. However,
it is not always easy to leave someone
you love no matter how difficult
the situation. Because all relationships
have their “highs” and “lows”
we often cling on hoping that it will
get better.
Fortunately, research has shown that
there are some signs of an unhappy
and unhealthy relationship which we
have to be wary of or avoid if we are
determined to preserve the love. This
information is relevant to us all,
regardless of your relationship status
nor future plans in that area these
nuggets of wisdom may become
handy at some point in your life. If
not for your own benefit, you may be
called upon to assist another couple,
perhaps friends when they encounter
bumpy situations in their love
relationships. Find below some signs
of unhappiness or unhealthy couple
love relationships listed in no particular
order of importance:
1. You constantly criticize each
other.
One of the major signs of a failing
relationship is when a couple begins
to constantly criticize each other.
Relationships require a certain level
of compassion for one another.

While some criticism is healthy to a
certain extend if applied in necessary
contexts, it is a bad sign when this
becomes a continuous cycle.
2. You compare your current
relationship to the past.
When a love relationship begins,
everything about your significant
other feels exciting, that is an undeniable
truth. But, when you completely
lose the spark and can only cling to
the past, it’s a sign that something
needs to change. It feels more like a
chore than a pleasure to be around
each other. Relationships are not
supposed to always feel like work. In
between the inevitable struggles that
all relationships face, we are supposed
to have wonderful moments of love
and, at the very least, enjoy each
other’s existence. When it becomes
nothing but struggle, the relationship
is deeply suffering.
4. You are defensive against each
other.
When a relationship becomes a war
zone in which you are both constantly
on defense, it can be an indicator that
communication lines between the
couple has broken down. Without
communication it can becomes
difficulty to keep the relationship
afloat.
5. You stop feeling like partners.
In a relationship, it’s important to feel
like a team. While it’s normal to lose
sight of this, according to some
research, it’s important to get the
partnership back. “Tell and show you
care.” Pause for a moment when
your partner comes home to
welcome and embrace him or her.
Be affectionate. It helps forge
connection and closeness. It’s a
reminder that he or she is your one
and only.”
6. You fantasize about finding
an out.
Almost everyone occasionally imagines
what their life would be likeif
they become single. However, when
those thoughts become a downright
never-ending fantasy, there is a
problem. Oftentimes, these fantasies
are a sign that you don’t feel
loved or connected in your relationship,
but instead, you feel neglected.
7. You stop caring.
While most people assume that an
unhappy relationship is simply
marked by arguments, at least when
you are arguing, you are fighting to
stay together. When both partners
or even one-stop caring enough to
argue, it shows that you are losing
the motivation to work on the
relationship which is a really bad
sign.
8. The relationship grows stale.
In order to keep the spark alive, we
have to do things and be present
with our partners. When time
together turns into watching television,
playing on your phone, and
being completely disengaged, this is
a sign of boredom and disconnection.
9. You are keeping secrets.
Even if it’s not infidelity, harbouring
secrets from each other shows that
you’ve stopped communicating and
working together on issues. In turn,
both parties begin to resent each
other, rather than work as a team.
10. Conversations always end as
arguments.
Communication is everything and
without it, the relationship will inevitably
fall apart. While it’s normal for
conversations to turn into arguments
from time to time, when every
conversation escalates into an argument,
it simply implies that the two
of you no longer want the same
things in life.
11. You are stonewalling each
other.
Stonewalling is what happens when
you shut down. And shutting down
completely makes it impossible to
work through conflict. For example,
if you try to discuss something, and
your partner begins yelling and then
walks away, that is stonewalling.
Tatenda Chandengenda is a
Counsellor from Life Mend
Family Therapy. She holds a
Master of Science in Mental
Health Counselling- Zimbabwe
Open University.
Contact details: +263774134618
tatendachandengenda@gmail.com
3. You stop having sex.
Sex isn’t everything, but it is most
definitely important. At the very least,
intimacy and love-making from time
to time are necessary to keep the
bond strong. However, when intimacy
fades, it can break down that foundation.
https://tatendachandengend.wixsite.com/lifemendfamilyther-3
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 21

Community
Mental
Health
“Wisdom is like fire. People take it from others.”
A
community is all about connection.
Can you have good mental health
without considering the environment around
you? No! The community heavily influences
our quality of life. Therefore, mental health
should also be viewed from a community or
societal perspective. A Community is not just
an entity or a group of people - it is a feeling.
It is feeling connected to others, feeling
accepted for who you are and feeling supported.
Having a connection can help us feel
wanted and loved. The only way to maintain
the connection is through finding a sense of
community.
'Mental Health is a state of well-being in
which every individual realizes their own
potential, can cope with the normal stresses
of life, can work productively and fruitfully,
22 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022
"Men
build
society
and
society
builds
men."
B. F.
Skinner.
and is able to make a contribution to their community'
- World Health Organization. Wiseman
and Brasher (2008) reflect this in their interesting
definition of community well-being as “a combination
of social, economic, environmental,
cultural, and political conditions identified by
individuals and their communities as essential for
them to flourish and fulfill their potential.”
This makes one wonder how mental health can
be achieved in the community. Let me take you
back a bit before social media, when we used to
say it takes a village to raise a child, was mental
health not achieved? I am not saying we did not
have people with deviant behaviors but there was
sanity in our society. A lot of currently “glorified”
unruly behaviours were under check. Then why
did we choose to completely change the “software”
instead of just upgrading it. For how long

are we going to change the software and not risk
losing the original forever.
A close look at a community as a whole reveals
three attributes that play an enormous role in
well-being: belonging, support and purpose. Let
me easy your mind by attending to why Community
Mental Health is important? We are social
beings and we are not meant to live in isolation.
Community is critical for us to thrive, especially
with the increase in life stressors we experience
each day, loneliness and isolation will fast track
our exit from the face of earth. Remember to
love people around you, care to know how your
neighbors are doing, love each other in the community
after all we are all in the same bus on this
life journey. Although bus tops differ but we are
all going to disembark from the bus at a certain
time.
A brief look on community elements that are
critical to mental health below gives us the hope
which all what we need.
Belonging
If you’ve ever felt like you don’t fit in, you know
it can be a lonely experience. The community
provides a sense of belonging - a group you identify
as being a part of. This is different from
conforming to be in a group. A true sense of
belonging includes the ability to feel you are a
part of the community as your true self. You do
not have to change anything to be a part of the
community, but instead you are embraced and
appreciated for your unique qualities. Most
children raised in the city fail to grasp this issue
but going back to the rural village will remind you
of the unconditional love and belonging which
puts your mind at easy. Even after a long period
of absence even 10 years, when you return the
local elders will always say “mukomana wakauya,
regai ndimbosvika ndimuone” meaning the
young man has just returned from the city, let me
visit him. The visit is usually characterised by the
elders sharing stories on what happened during
your absence and reminiscence of the better old
days inter-paced by jovial laughter as you share
some beer (typically provided by the young man
who works in the city). After all sharing is caring!
Everyone should have an opportunity to experience
this unrestricted love which heals all life
stressors.
The
minute we
become an
integrated
whole, we
look
through
the same
eyes and
we see a
whole
different
world
together.
For a
community
to be
whole and
healthy, it
must be
based on
people’s
love
and
concern
for each
other.
Support
Who do you turn to when you need something?
Having reliable people to call on when you any
form of help or just to talk can ease difficult situations
that might feel insurmountable if you were
alone. Knowing there are people who are ready to
support you makes you feel cared for and safe. It
can even can improve your outlook on life. This
goes without saying “do unto others what you
would like them to do unto you.”
Purpose
People play different roles in the community.
Perhaps you are the friend who enjoys cooking
and can be counted on to bring a hot meal over
when a member of the community is down with
flu or the great oracle of wisdom who bears the
solutions to all life’s challenges. These roles can
give people a sense of purpose and importance as
they contribute towards the betterment of other
people’s lives. Having a purpose and helping
others gives life meaning.
However, the community can sometimes thrust
an overwhelming role upon one of its members,
for instance you can end up feeling like a punching
bag when friends or neighbors are in the habit
of offloading their stress on you. The solution is
simple - just point them in the right direction
where they can get help! Successfully encouraging
a friend suffering from emotional distress and
anxiety to engage a trained therapist could not
only enable them to overcome their condition,
but will leave room for other enjoyable pursuits in
your friendship.
Taking Responsibility for Community
Mental Health
Every community is responsible for its well-being.
Barack Obama, a former President of the United
States of America noted that “Change will not
come if we wait for some other person or some
other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting
for. We are the change that we seek.” Therefore,
everyone should consider how they can contribute
towards betterment of the community, in
particular finding solutions to community challenges
in view of what you have - knowledge,
resources, positions and level of influence.
Contued to page..............
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 23

Mental Stressors
Associated with Certain
Life Stages and
Events
People are vulnerable to experiencing different
mental health issues at certain stages in life depicted on
the Human Life Cycle above. This may relate to transitioning
from one stage of life to another or major changes
which impose extra stress on you. It is always difficult to
accept and adjust to the new and your mental health is at
risk whenever change happens depending on which life
stage you are. People react differently to changes like
moving to another school, starting or finishing
university, starting a new job, adjusting to chronic
illness, moving away from friends or family
and retirement. This can have a severe
impact on the general health and well-being
of an individual hence the need
for support and information on how
to cope. There is no single "right
way" to react or handle change as
some of may be deeply affected by
events than others. Everyone is different.
Our genes, life experiences, upbringing and environment
all affect our mental health and influence how we think
and respond to situations. It can also depend on how well
other parts of our life are going or how supported we feel.
Being aware of these factors may make it easier to understand
when we or someone we care about are struggling.
Common Mental Stressors by Stage in
Life
1. Pregnancy to becoming a new parent
This stage can as well include postnatal depression.
24 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022
The Human Life Cycle
Becoming a parent can be exciting but also very challenging
and physically demanding. Research has revealed that
a majority of new mothers feel that they are at breaking
point. Commonly experienced issues include anxiety
(36%) and post-natal depression (12%). Nearly two-thirds
(63%) of new mums asked said that their self-esteem had
decreased since becoming a parent, while fewer than one
in 10 (9%) felt more confident following the
birth of their child .
2. Childhood
years – starting
schools,
changing
schools and
the move to
high school
The beginning of school is a time of transition for both
parents and children. Children enter a completely new
environment, the school where they encounter a different
set of expectations to their home life. They have to learn
a whole new set of social skills, such as how to get along
with others and how to be resilient when they don’t get
what they want. In younger kids, psychological distress
might manifest as new or worsening behavioral problems,
difficulty separating from parents or caregivers, or somatic
symptoms such as aches and pains or changes in sleep
routines or appetite. Older kids can also experience
somatic symptoms as well as fear, nervousness, stress,
irritability, and hypervigilance. In the academic context,
symptoms could include difficulty concentrating, motivation,
or school refusal.

3. Teenage years
Transitioning from primary to high school is another big step,
with a new environment and a new set of expectations. In your
teenage years you experience a range of emotions. Events such
as new relationships, studying for exams, starting a new job and
figuring out your friendship group can be challenging. During
this time, following puberty, the brain is also going through a
critical time of development which affects emotions, decision
making, controlling impulses, anticipating consequences of
behaviour and the ability to take-in information and understand
it, then set goals and plan.
4. Adults (18 to 65 years)
Growing up can often be a struggle for many adolescents who
view adulthood with apprehension rather than excitement to
explore. It is no wonder many young adults often develop
depression, anxiety, eating disorders, substance abuse disorders,
and have difficulty meeting developmental milestones. Moving
into the adult world can bring its own set of stresses such as;
deciding what you want to do after leaving school, whether to
pursue tertiary education, what to study or search for a job.
Negotiating the adult world with new freedoms and responsibilities
can be challenging. Similarly, developing relationships, starting
a family, getting married and long hours of work, finding a
job, romantic relationships, social media all bring stresses that
can affect your mental health.
5. Older adults (over 65 years) and retirement
Growing older brings its share of challenges. At this stage in life
you may find it difficult to look after your mental health and
well-being at times. If feelings like sadness or worry are preventing
you from getting the most out of life, help and support is
available for seniors with mental health issues. These effects
include partial identity disruption, decision paralysis, diminished
self-trust, experience of a post retirement void, the search for
meaningful engagement in society, development of a retirement/life
structure, the confluence of aging and retirement and
death anxiety, etc.
continuation from page 23
COMMUNITY MENTAL HEALTH
According to the Ministry of Health and Child
Care, 1 million people in Zimbabwe suffer from
mental health illness, a figure which could have
doubled due to effects of the Covid pandemic. As
a responsible member of your community you
should begin to ponder on the following:
1. What is the prevalence rate of mental
illness in your community?
2. According to Mental Health Experts drug
and substance abuse are leading causes of
mental illness in Zimbabwe. What can you
do to stop drug and substance abuse in your
community?
3. Research shows that mental challenges
can be treated more effectively and in a
more cost-effective manner in community
settings than in the traditional psychiatric
hospitals. What can you do as an individual
or community to push for establishment of
mental health care facilities in your area?
Remember to always check on your family and
neighbors, treat members of your community with
care. Avoid littering the environment counts as
much as taking care of your neighbor. Be a good
companion to others.
Major life events
Everybody experiences ups and downs in life. These could be
due to the stress brought about by major events that occur in life
such as: financial worries, job loss, a death, an accident or
long-term injury and breakdown of a relationship etc. Sometimes
even happy events like the birth of a new baby in the family,
moving interstate or overseas, planning a wedding or retirement
can be stressful and result in you feeling down. Always remember
to talk to a professional psychologist whenever you encounter
these issues.
Happiness is contagious be a carrier!!
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 25

What you need to know about
LOSS & GRIEF
It’s hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember.
What is Loss and Grief?
Grief is a normal response to loss. In simple
routines and ways of life that usually bring us
person loses someone close to
the loss of a loved one,
life. The more significant
most likely to be. A case in
caused so much havoc in our
questions and wounds we hope to
recurrent nature of the pandemic,
to count our losses and some people
“wounds.”
terms, it is some drastic changes to daily
comfort and a feeling of stability. When a
them, it is natural to grieve. It might be
relationship, pregnancy, job or way of
the loss, the more intense the grief is
point is the Covid pandemic which has
lives leaving us grieving with un answered
heal one day. Due to the intrusive and
there has not been time or chance for us
are still struggling to nurse the inflicted
The grieving process can take days,
months or even years. According to
Melinda Smith et.al (2021), accepting
the loss as the end stage of what life
has dealt you is the most challenging
part. In essence this is what the
grieving process is all about. Grief
has no set pattern which
means there are different ways of
expressing it. It can affect
many aspects of one’s life includ- ing; your emotions,
thoughts, behaviour, beliefs,
physical health, sense of
self and identity, and your
relationships with others.
Loss can leave you feeling sad, angry, anxious,
shocked, regretful, relieved,
overwhelmed, isolated,
irritable or numb, but remember it is
normal and everyone goes
through the experience
differently. However,
through this horrifying
phase of life, you
begin to create
new experiences and habits that
work around your loss.
There is no
right or wrong way to
experience
loss. As part of
coming
to terms with a loss, you
have to
allow yourself to feel and
react
in a way that is natural to
you
during this emotional
period. However, always
remember that when your
grief is becoming overwhelming, or
you are having trouble sleeping, talk
to your mental health professional
Picture by Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe
or General Doctor.
26 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022

How to handle oneself during the grieving
process
1. Stay in touch with others
During these lockdowns, you may not be able to be physically
close with your family, try not to become emotionally
isolated. In case of loss of a loved one, allow people
to offer their condolences and support you in different
ways. Phone calls, texts, emails and social media messages
of support from the people closest to you may offer
some comfort. Reach out to them and make sure to
contact someone every day. Try to answer their calls and
reply to their messages to keep conversations going with
the people who care.
2. Eat well
Try not to neglect your basic needs. Eating well
improves your mood, mental abilities, and productivity.
Even though you may not have your usual appetite, try to
eat enough food and drink water adequately in order to
stay hydrated. This will help you to stay physically
healthy while you grieve.
3. Keep a routine
Keeping some routine can be helpful. Try to stick to
your normal routine as much as possible. Maintaining
your usual meal, bed and waking-up times is important.
Get out into the garden or on your balcony for some
fresh air if you can. For those who can take a walk do so,
a walk in the woods, on a local nature trail, or around the
neighborhood will be good exercise. A plus is that you
never know what you will see or who you will meet that
can make you feel better.
4. Take it one day at a time
You will feel OK during some days and the grief would
not be bad as other days - this is normal. Some people
can feel guilty when this happens, but there is no need to
take this route. Be kind to yourself and be aware of your
feelings and emotions, one day at a time. It is all a normal
part of grieving.
times. Never shy away from talking to this group as they
are trained professionals for a reason, they are there to
hold your hand as you navigate through life’s difficult
patches.
Ways to support a person who is grieving
You are encouraged to be there for your grieving friend
or loved one. It may not be physically but you can still
come up with ways to make them feel loved and cared
for. Below are some suggestions on how to offer comfort
without being physically present:
1.text or call - ask your friend how they are doing, ask
what might help and listen carefully
2. drop food or a gift at the door to offer comfort
3. offer practical help, for example with shopping
4. offer help with technology, for example with setting up
video calls, WhatsApp or other ways of keeping in touch
etc.
Caring for children who are grieving
Many people tend to ignore children as if they are
immune to grieving. No, they are not. Because death
could rob them of their father, mother, sibling, grandpa
or granny whom they have created a lot of memories
with. They grieve too and here is how you can handle
children during times of loss:
1. Answer their questions honestly. Children cope better
with sad news when they are told the truth.
2. Let them set their own pace. There is no right or
wrong way for them to experience grief.
3. Try to give honest, age-appropriate information about
the death. Do not worry if you cannot answer all their
questions. Tell them you will find out and try to bring up
the conversation again when you can answer them.
Visit our Find a Therapist section on our website to get
one near you.
5. Listen to your favorite music playlist
Music can have a positive impact on both our physical
and emotional health. This ranges from reducing the
perceived intensity of pain to relieving symptoms of
depression. Make a list of music that uplifts your mood
and take time to listen or always play in the background.
6. Get in touch with your Counselor
It is always advisable to contact your Counselor or
Psychologist so that they help walk you through trying
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 27

WOMEN’S MENTAL HEALTH
Perinatal Mental Health and Well-being of Mothers
TO STRONG WOMEN
MAY WE KNOW THEM
MAY WE BE THEM
MAY WE RAISE THEM
By Mr. Linos Muvhu
28 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022
Just because you don’t understand
it doesn’t mean it isn’t so.
Scientific research has
shown that mental health
problems such as mental
distress, and mental
disorders / illnesses are common
during the perinatal period and can
have devastating effects on the
mother, baby and the family in
general. Maternal mental health is a
global public health concern and
also a human rights issue - all women
and their families deserve maternal
mental health and well-being. It is
one of the most undermined issues
the world over, including in countries
such as Zimbabwe. Of note is
the fact that globally every nation is a
“developing country” in terms
mental health care services.
The World Health Organisation
(WHO) defines maternal mental
health as “a state of well-being in
which a mother realizes her own
abilities, can cope with normal
stresses of life, can work productively
and fruitfully and is able to
contribute in her community. Most
people struggle to identify the difference
between mental illness and
mental health. This is attributable to
the fact that the first voice mainly
focuses on mental illnesses but not
taking into consideration the three
components of mental health
namely; mental distress, mental
health problems, and mental disorders
/ illnesses. According to the
Ministry of Health and Child Care,
Maternal Mortality Report, (2019)
Zimbabwe is one of the countries
where women suffer from
depression and yet very little effort
has been directed towards addressing
the issue. This includes antenatal
depression, post-natal depression,
anxiety, perinatal obsessive-compulsive
disorder, postpartum psychosis
and post-traumatic stress disorder
(PTSD). These illnesses can sometimes
be mild, moderate or severe.
In most countries mental health is
allocated less than 1% of the total
health budget. This has left a huge
gap in the accessibility of mental
health care services. WHO (2020)
notes that “Zimbabwe has a severe
shortage of human resources of
mental health, with an estimated 18
psychiatrists (17 of them in Harare)
or approximately 0.1 per 100000
people. There are 917 psychiatrist
nurses (6.5 per 100 000) and 6 clinical
psychologists (0.4 per 100 000).”
This reinforces the view that
Africans generally perceive mental
health problems as a “white man’s
disease”. Consequently, most mothers
fail to access mental health
services resulting in prenatal and
traumas which again they will not
look for help.
Apparently, some people do not
believe that the mental health of the
mother is directly linked to the fetus’
well-being hence there is need to
note and address the false myths that
people hold on to in relation to
mental disorders in the perinatal and
post-natal period. In addition,
African myths on maternal mental
health are still causing low therapy
seeking behavior as some illnesses
are believed to be spiritual rather
than mental thus people tend to
resort to religious help.

For example, postpartum psychosis
is widely believed to be as a result of
witchcraft and not a mental health
problem. Another myth is that
mental suffering does not affect the
pregnancy, the fetus, or the newborn
baby. However, stress has
been associated with worse gestational
and neonatal outcomes.
Furthermore, some people believe
that pregnancy is a period of
well-being and it protects the expecting
mother from psychological
unease but in reality, it is estimated
that about 20% of expecting mothers
have a psychiatric disorder
during pregnancy or in the postnatal
period.
In a bid to promote maternal
mental health in Zimbabwe, the
government enacted the Mental
Health Act (Chapter 15:12) which is
under the administration of the
Ministry of Health and Child Care.
In terms of this Act every citizen
should get 30 minutes of health
education, including mental health
information before they receive any
physical medical attention. Other
stakeholders play a complimentary
role to the government efforts,
for instance the Society for Pre and
Post Natal Services (SPANS) which
is conducting massive maternal
mental health literacy/education
sessions. In the same vein, SPANS
introduced the International Conference
on Maternal Mental Health
in Africa (ICAMMHA) so as to
provide a platform to share ideas on
Maternal Mental Health. SPANS is
also offering a Diploma in Systematic
Family Therapy and Development
Counselling in Maternal,
Paternal and Child Mental Health
which is centred on the promotion
of sound mental health for all
because there is no health without
mental health.
Efforts to promote maternal mental
health are slowly yielding results
according to SPANS as they witness
people interested to be part of the
mental health movement. However,
successful implementation of
mental health care services will take
time due to lack of funding and the
gap in mental health professionals.
Additionally, a lot still needs to be
done in terms of awareness raising
so as to dislodge established norms
and beliefs of the greater society,
towards maternal mental health and
mental health in general. The
coming out of survivors of maternal
mental distress, mental health problems
and mental disorder/illnesses
to share their experiences could
provide invaluable lessons on the
consequences of maternal mental
illnesses to communities. Finally,
governments should allocate specific
resources in adequate amounts
towards mental health care and
maternal mental health care to facilitate
availability for all.
In short take care of people pre and
post-natal as their mental health will
be at stake. Taking a look back in
the nineteen nighties, our culture
used to have support system to help
relieve pressure from the person
who just gave birth. However, this
21st century is each man for himself
but God for us all. Mental Balance
urges people to love and support
each other always.
Mr. Linos Muvhu is the Secretary
and Chief Talent Team Leader for
SPANS and African Ambassador
International Father’s Mental
Health Day (IFMHD)
Ruwa Clinic Goromonzi District
WhatsApp or call +263715521063
or 0773825288
Pictures by Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 29

FAMILY TIME
Talking about mental health with our children
As parents, we all want our children to have the best possible start in life.
Encouraging children to understand and be open about their feelings can give
them the skills to cope with the ups and downs that life will throw at them as
they grow up. It’s important that our children understand that emotions are normal,
and that they have the confidence to ask for help if they are struggling.
Make An Analogy To A Medical Problem
Children often hear about medical problems and understand that if they have asthma, they know
that the wheezing makes them uncomfortable, so they need to take medications for relief and avoid
situations that may trigger an attack. Similarly, you can let your child know that mental health
concerns, like anxiety, depression, ADHD and OCD, among others, are also physical conditions
that start with their brain. The brain controls feelings, thoughts and behavior — like the “central
headquarters” of the body. Sometimes, the brain gets “knocked off balance,” but, like other medical
problems, they can learn to manage this with treatment, which can include medications and behavioral
support (stress reduction, relaxation, psychotherapies, etc.).
Give Them Concrete Explanations
Children can understand mental health issues better if they have a concrete explanation. e.g “If
you walked across the street and a car was about to hit you, you would jump out of the way, feel
scared, have a racing heart, feel dizzy or hyperventilate (breathe too fast). All of this is a normal
fight-or-flight response to a real threat of danger. A panic attack can include all the same physical
and emotional reactions, except there is no car about to hit you. And while this might seem scary,
there are ways to deal with it. Many times, panic attacks happen in ‘normal’ situations, such as
going to school, riding in a car, going up in elevators, and in other settings that are not actually
dangerous. If you had panic disorder, you would most likely associate those places with
panic. In other words, your brain would react as if something bad is going to happen,
maybe even just from thinking about those situations.”
Listen To Them And Validate Their Experiences
Because there of stigma attached to mental health conditions, children can feel ashamed to
talk about their worries, obsessions, compulsions, impulsivity and other behavioral problems.
Talk with them about what they are experiencing. Listen with curiosity and empathize
with them. Show them that you are listening, sometimes they just need a listerning ear.
Be Sure They Know This Is Not Their Fault
Many children with mental health conditions can feel that their condition is their fault or that
it is an unchangeable feature of their personality or their identity. Stigma and misinformation
often reinforce these feelings. You can help them see that mental health conditions are
common and that it is not a sign that something is wrong with them as a person. Emphasize
their strengths so they don’t see their mental health condition as the most important part of
who they are.
30 Mental Balance Issue 1Feb 2022

Have Frequent Conversations
Many mental health conditions are considered intermittent — the symptoms can come and
go throughout life and may fluctuate in severity depending on age, level of stress or any
number of factors. It helps to have conversations about emotions, thoughts and behaviors
that are a part of your child’s condition from the time it begins. As they grow up, become
more mature and are better able to understand themselves and their condition, your child
will see you as a trusted resource they can consult if they have a relapse or experience new
symptoms. Although it may not always be easy, maintaining an open and understanding
relationship can be critical.
Let Them Ask You Questions
Children will have all sorts of questions about their symptoms and treatment, so being open
and giving them information about the ways therapy and/or medications can help will be
reassuring. If you do not have all the best information, plan to meet with your child and their
mental health clinician together to discuss the problem and their questions. If your child asks
a question you don’t know the answer to, it’s ok to say you don’t know and then work together
to find an answer.
Include The Family
Ideally, a mental health condition should not be a secret. Your child may feel more
secure if their siblings/ grandparents/others in the family know about it, can talk with
them about it and accept it — just as they would accept any other medical problem,
like diabetes. This kind of transparency is incredibly helpful to prevent feelings of
shame or isolation.
Discuss Self-Care And Prevention
Mental health conditions are a complex interaction between biology, psychology and
environmental factors. Teaching your child to practice self-care, including maintaining a
healthy diet, exercising regularly, meditating and getting sufficient sleep, are instrumental
in preventing relapses and diminishing symptoms.
Don’t Be Afraid To Ask About Suicide
In recent years, rates of death by suicide and suicidal thinking have
increased in young people. Many parents and caregivers are wary of asking a
child if they have suicidal thoughts, intentions or plans. They may be afraid
that starting the conversation may cause suicidal behavior, but this connection
has proven to be false. Asking about suicide may be a relief for people
of all ages. If your child has a mental health condition, it’s important to
check-in with them about suicidal thoughts.
Talking with your child about their mental health condition is not easy. However, you
are more than capable of opening a dialogue.
Some ways to start a conversation about feelings might be:
“How are you feeling at the moment?”
“You don’t seem your usual self. Do you want to talk about it?”
“Do you fancy a chat?”
“I’m happy to listen if you need a chat.”
we value your feedback, tell us what you think about this, you can do so on our website
www.mentalbalanceseries.com or facebook, instagram or twitter on mental balance series
Feb 2022 Issue 1Mental Balance 31

Picture by BBC News
Children’s Mental Health
During a State of Emergency:
The Covid 19 Pandemic Era
“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its
children.” Nelson Mandela (8 May, 1995)
It has been over two years now since the outbreak of the Covid 19 pandemic in 2020. While focus
has been on how adults were affected by the endless lockdowns, there as been very little
overage on the effects of the pandemic on children. Are they not human anymore? Have they stopped
existing? In fact, children are one of the worst affected societal groups which suffered in the following
ways; death of parents or family members and disruption of their routines and resources that school
and after-school care ordinarily provide. Additionally, most children were exposed to hazards in the
home, including parental issues such as intimate partner violence and substance abuse.
The United Nations Children’s Fund (2021) notes that at least 27 percent (%) of young people in Zimbabwe
aged 15 to 24 years suffer from depression, which is partly attributable to the Covid pandemic.
These statics are worrisome and gives rise to questions regarding the state of welfare of younger
children and whether there have been any deliberate follow ups in this regard. This specifically refers
to children at primary to secondary school levels of education, that is from grade 1 to form 4 who have
been compelled to do online lessons due to movement and gathering restrictions imposed by the
government in a bid to contain the pandemic. . While some children have access to online lessons,
32 Mental Balance Issue 1 Feb 2022

it remains a pipe dream for others due to financial limitations
amongst other factors. Two years is long time and children may even
forget about what they learnt before the outbreak of Covid 19, especially
those at primary school level whose syllabus had just changed.
If a student had been failing to grasp some of the concepts during face
to face lessons, he or she is most likely to experience worse difficulties
when attending online lesson where they may be unable to directly
interact with the teacher at times. The closure of educational institutions
at all levels has also contributed to weakening of protective
factors, including daily routine and social interactions that help maintain
good mental health. A case in point is that children from abusive
backgrounds had to stay home with the “devil” daily.
A reduction of infections in Zimbabwe resulted in the easing up of
Covid pandemic restrictions in February 2022, including the opening
of schools to face to face lessons. However, this relief was short-lived
as the opening of schools coincided with job action by teachers who
are demanding a salary raise. The question is are we doing our best as
a nation to provide our children with a conducive environment to
learn or simply flushing a whole generation down the drain?
According to American Journal of Emergency Medicine, (2020),
Violence and substance abuse rose by 25-33 percent globally during
the Covid pandemic induced lockdowns. Lee Savio Beers, MD, president
of the American Academy of Pediatrics and Medical Director
for Community health and advocacy at Children’s National Hospital
in Washington, DC observes that the mental health of children and
teens is at a critical tipping point. Some children who were exposed to
these vices have to attend school without receiving any counselling. In
addition, Covid 19 related deaths have robbed some children and
families of bread winners who used to pay for their school fees and no
one has come forward to fill this gap. This uncertainty can lead to
depression and anxiety which may adversely affect a child’s focus in
school and outlook on life. This urgently calls for adequate support
and timely intervention to enable these children to bounce back as we
recover from the COVID 19 crisis. If the mental health dimension is
left unaddressed, the effects of the Covid 19 pandemic will continue
to cast a shadow over the lives of young people and a whole generation
can be lost.
The uncertainties and broad impacts of COVID 19 affected societal
groups differently. young people were 30% to 80% more likely to
report symptoms of depression or anxiety than adults in Belgium,
France and the United States in March 2021. Higher levels of loneliness
have also been reported by young people. This can be accredited
to various factors hence mental health experts are encouraging
people to seek help and even attend family therapy sessions as we live
through this traumatic experience. While some people do not believe
in therapy, bottling up emotions will always affect one’s life.
The government is called upon to improve mental health support
systems for all as the Covid pandemic disrupted lives at all levels of
It is recommended that the government
utilises available psychologists who are in
excess amongst its skilled labour force to
service the people at the above-mentioned
institutions, amongst others. The use of
different platforms such as mental health
hotlines and youth centers enabled by online
tools is also suggested. Additionally, building
the capacity of Village Health Workers on
identifying mental disorders and counselling
could go a long way in improving access to
mental health care services to children and
other populations residing in rural areas.
Picture by Pixelgraphy Zimbabwe
Does mental illness
run in families?
Sometimes there are a few people in a family
who have the same mental illness. Other
times only one person in the family has a
mental illness.
• Some research suggests that mental illness
can run in families.
• We do not fully understand what causes
mental illness , or why it can be passed on in
family members.
• Mental illness may be passed on for different
reasons not just genes.
• Having a family member with a mental
illness doesn’t mean that you or a family
member are also going to become unwell
• There are things you can do to look after
your mental health if you are worried about
mental illness running in your family.
Keep following us as we explain more
about mental illness and how to stay
Feb 2022 Issue 1 Mental Balance 33

Ask the
Experts
You can use any of the following languages, Engilish, Shona or Ndebele to ask
any questions related to your mental health, mental illness, myths and all the
things you wish to know.
A team of trained professionals is waiting for you.
What’s your take on the following statements. You can send your responses to our mail
box info@mentalbalanceseries.com or any of our social media account
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