7 Up

been enough time, I can understand and see where he was coming from. It makes sense. It’s just
hard to lose someone like him in one single conversation.”
Ellis pulls at the threadwork on the duvet. “What did you say when he told you he wanted a
break?”
“I told him that wasn’t a real thing. Either you break up or you don’t.”
“What was his response?”
“He just repeated that he didn’t want to lose me completely, but he wanted a break for now. I told
him he was selfish. And he said probably.”
“When did you decide you wanted to go from ‘break’ to ‘break-up’?”
Harry huffs out a laugh. “We didn’t. I just… Haven’t spoken to him since.”
“Oh, Harry…”
“No, I don’t want, like, your sympathy. Or have you think he’s a bad person. Because he isn’t.”
Harry rolls his shoulders, squinting at the sunlight pouring through the slit in the curtains, wishing
his head would stop pounding. “Louis broke my heart. It’s getting easier, but.” He shrugs. “Thanks
for listening,” he says, not knowing how else to finish the conversation.
Ellis scoots closer to Harry on the bed, puts his head on his shoulder, and murmurs, “You’re a
smoke show, Styles. We can find you a new man in no time at all.”
Harry laughs. “I appreciate it.”
“No, but seriously, Hazza. I’m sorry. That’s a shit thing to have to go through.”
“Yeah, it is. But I’m doing okay. At the time it was a lot worse. And during the interview a few
months ago, it felt like I was taking a few steps backward. Wish I didn't let it affect me as much.”
Ellis hums in agreement. “Do you think about calling him?”
Harry answers without hesitation. “Everyday.”
“Maybe you can meet up with him over winter hols.”
“Yeah.” He sighs. “Maybe.”
---
Harry’s sat at home in between his mum and Gemma on the couch watching a film two days
before Christmas when he snaps. He’d been teetering back and forth between contacting Louis
since he got home earlier in the week, but now, he’s so jittery, he feels like he’s on fire. He needs
to talk to him.
He excuses himself and makes his way to his bedroom, clutching his phone against his chest,
telling his heart to shut up and quit beating so fucking fast.
It takes him about 20 minutes to finally dial Louis’ entire number, and when it starts ringing, he
thinks he might vomit.