October 2023 - Volume 08 Issue 02

Spark
The
at ASU
O c t o b e r 2 0 2 3
V o l u m e 0 8
I s s u e 0 2
A J o u r n a l i s t i c C o l l a b o r a t i o n o f t h e
A r i z o n a S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y O n l i n e C o m m u n i t y
ASU Traditions: Fall
Edition
Written by Leslie Madrid
Whether it be bobbing for apples or carving
pumpkins, we all have traditions when starting the
fall season. Arizona State University happens to
have a couple of their own that welcome students
into their fall semester. Usually starting near the
end of October, the university hosts ‘Homecoming
week,’ where students, alumni, faculty, and even
fans are invited to show their Sun Devil spirit.
Continued on Page 24
In This Issue
The Reading Nook 02
The New World 08
Pass/Fail 12
Not Your Usual Love Story
Ch. 7: The Proposal 18
ASU Traditions 24
Rising from the Ashes: Healing
from Sexual Assault 28

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
The Reading
Nook
Reviews, What’s Next, and More
By: Natasha Geiger
Currently Reading:
“The Love Scribe” by Amy Meyerson
I absolutely love Amy Meyerson, so this was a nobrainer
to pick up and read. The story follows the
life of Alice who writes love stories - literally. So far,
this storyline is a perfect mix of magic and real life.
The Reading Nook 02

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Reviews:
“Strangers in the Night” by Heather Webb
Time it took to read: 3 days
“For a moment, I smiled, knowing she would feel my love again
somehow, and that she’d feel it for always.” This quote says it all.
“Strangers in the Night” was more a love story than a history
lesson about Frank Sinatra and Ava Gardner. The book walks you
through their lives together as friends, lovers, and even enemies. I
had no idea about the scope of their relationship, so I was glued to
this book immediately. The writing was raw and beautiful like each
conversation truly happened and could be felt throughout the
entire book. While it was a great book, I gave it four out of five
stars because there were moments that the storyline became
repetitive. For example, I could predict what would happen at
certain points because they happened before. However, I would
highly recommend this book to anyone interested in music and
entertainment history!
I had such high hopes for this next book… But wow…
The Reading Nook 03

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
“Mercury Pictures Presents”
by Anthony Marra
Time it took to read: 1 week
“Beverly Hills tasted of orange blossoms, Chanel No. 5, and tailpipe.” I loved how
descriptive this quote was, it was like I could really smell all of it. “Mercury
Pictures Presents” is a story about Maria Lagana who immigrated from Italy to
the United States before World War II and worked her way up at a movie
production company called Mercury Pictures. Another storyline running parallel is
a story about Maria’s father who is still in Italy and is not allowed to leave. I’ll be
honest, this was a rough book. It took everything in me not to quit reading halfway
through, especially after reading sentences like this: “Every day the war in
Europe produced melodrama to rival Hollywood’s most indolent imaginations.” This
sentence alone felt like there were just too many words. I struggled with trying
to find an overarching theme, a problem to solve, anything, and I couldn’t find one!
I think the biggest pain point for me was both storylines were just so busy it was
hard to keep up and understand the reason for the book at all. I’m sorry to say,
but I can’t recommend this book - unless you’re a glutton for punishment.
*Deep breath*
A much-needed cleanse was in order. Are we surprised by this next book?
The Reading Nook 04

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
“The 5th Horseman” by James Patterson
Time it took to read: 3 days
“Keep your expectations low,” Jacobi growled. “Okay, Warren. They’re subterranean.” Who doesn’t
like a good chuckle in a murder mystery? The 5th installment of the Women’s Murder Club series is
about the four women of the murder club - a police detective, medical examiner, journalist, and
lawyer - trying to solve several murders. But the murders have a twist. They are all happening in a
hospital. The victim is admitted to the emergency room, is almost better, and is then given a drug
that essentially gives them a stroke or heart attack. I always say it and I’ll say it again: you can’t
go wrong with these books. I was instantly sucked into the storyline, and I thoroughly enjoyed how
much of this book was centered around a court case while the police case was almost like a sidebar.
One of the best parts for me was not being able to solve the case and being in utter shock at the
end. I had to put the book down and pick it back up because I didn’t believe it!
“The 6th Target” by James Patterson
Time it took to read: 3 days
“He stopped signing and said in a loud stage whisper, “Hey Lindsay, you really think you’ve got me?”
Chills. The 6th Target tells the story of two different crimes, both of which the Women’s Murder
Club is trying to solve quickly. After a shooting on a ferry leaves several dead, Detective Lindsay
Boxer and her team need to find the alleged killer before they hurt anyone else. Then at another
turn, children are being kidnapped right off the streets of San Francisco, but there are little to no
patterns to follow up on to understand why these kids are being kidnapped. Somehow these
storylines with the same characters continue to get better and better each time. Neither of the
crimes were connected and I enjoyed how they needed solving at the same time. Even though they
were happening simultaneously, it was still easy to follow.
The Reading Nook 05

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October 2023
“The Princess Spy” by Larry Loftis
Time it took to read: 1 week
“Come, Divina, let’s tango while our ship is sinking.” This quote was
quirky, cute, and flirtatious, how perfect! This book is about a woman
named Aline Griffith who was recruited to be a spy during World War
II in the ‘neutral’ country of Spain. Through the months she grows into
one of the top spies in the organization and even continues working
after getting married, which typically doesn’t happen. This is a true
story and I found it interesting how Loftis molded facts with fiction.
However, there were moments when it was hard to read because it was
so thick with facts. I would definitely recommend this book for any
historical fiction nerd or someone interested in the espionage world.
What’s Next:
“Got Your Number”
by Mike Greenberg
“The Uncommon Reader”
by Alan Bennett
While I may not have enjoyed each book to its fullest
- there’s always the next one!
See you next month for more reviews!
The Reading Nook 06

Graduation Countdown
8
Months
Graduation Countdown 07

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
THE NEW WORLD
By: Annelise
When it was still years away, I was excited for my consciousness to be
uploaded to the virtual world. I counted down the days until I would
join the rest of my family and friends who had already been uploaded.
Maybe Earth had been beautiful at some point. My grandparents used
to tell me stories about the Old World that their grandparents had
passed down to them. The beaches of Hawaii had clear waves you
could surf on, and the mountains of Norway used to jut into the sea.
My grandma said that people used to live in houses big enough to keep
animals in! That part always amazed me. I saw a cat once before cats
went extinct. It was running across the street while I was looking out
our only window. Oh, and apparently there was a tower in Italy that
everyone thought would be leaning forever. I wasn’t surprised to hear
that it eventually fell. What did everyone think was so cool about an
architectural mistake anyway?
The New World 08

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October 2023
When you grew up in the New World like me, stories of the Old
World are especially hard to believe. Natural disasters like fires
and earthquakes have destroyed much of the Earth’s beauty. Birds
are one of the few animals left, who my dad used to call “the rats
of the air.” That’s another animal that’s left: rats. The world has
become overcrowded and full of pollution, and I want to escape it.
Plus, who wouldn’t want to experience life in a virtual world where
anything is possible? Where everyone is beautiful (who would
include their imperfections when designing their avatar)? Where
you can travel to any place at any point in time? All you would
have to do is think of Paris in the 1920s in the rain to be in the
same room as Ernest Hemingway and Pablo Picasso. Where you
can run with the cheetahs, fly with the eagles, and swim with the
sea turtles? None of those animals even exist in the New World!
But as I approached the age of transition, my excitement turned to anxiety
and fear. What about the people staying in the New World? What if I
regret leaving this body behind? It’s all I’ve ever known. What if something
happens to the virtual world and it’s destroyed with me in it? How am I
supposed to trust the creators? They could very well turn out to be one of
the many groups trying to solve the overpopulation crisis.
The New World 09

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October 2023
That’s why I’ve decided to see Dr. Harper. Supposedly, he will
have the answers to my questions and reassure me that I am
making the right choice. After all, there is no more hope of saving
this planet. What I want is to leave this world behind, right?
Dr. Harper calls my name, and I follow him into his office.
The New World 10

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Find Us
Online!
Find Us Online 11

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Pass/Fail By: Levi Sweeney
It was not unusual for Dr. Walter England III to be late for class. Punctuality
was not a trait he possessed. There were many traits of successful college
professors which he did not possess. Dr. England was not a successful
college professor.
He was late today, not just because he had overslept, but because he was
wading through a mob of student protestors who had assembled on the
pavement outside the student union of the college. He dimly registered the
loud, raucous ranting of somebody talking into a bullhorn while standing on
top of a makeshift podium in the middle of the crowd.
“You gotta speak the truth!” bellowed the young man with the bullhorn. He
was biracial, with a shaved head, and wore a black T-shirt with a colored
picture of the continent of Africa on it. “You gotta stand up and say
something!” The crowd cheered.
“Pass/Fail” 12

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Dr. England stopped just outside the door of his
classroom, and turned to listen to the speaker. Look at
him, thought Dr. England, who was just shy of thirtyyears-old.
That guy? Standing in front of a crowd,
talking about something he’s passionate about?
“You gotta resist! You gotta say to the man, ‘This is
what I think of you and what you did!’”
Dr. England pushed his glasses up his nose. Yeah. He’s
got the right idea.
Dr. England stepped into his classroom, where his students were already assembled, and he
stalked to his desk, plopping his laptop case and backpack onto it. His class was mostly
quiet, with a few people mumbling to themselves.
“Alright,” said Dr. England, stepping out to speak to the class. “This is the last day of class.
I don’t think there’s any need to hide this from you. Some of you might actually already
know, if the administrators who sign my paychecks, and my contract, have done what they
told me they were going to do.”
Dr. England paused for effect. He searched the eyes
of his students, hoping that at least some of them
might feel an uncanny, gnawing sensation in their
stomachs. Like he was about to announce some kind
of horrible, tragic, surprise news.
“You all failed,” said Dr. England. He didn’t smile.
“The final exam for English 101 which you all had to
take in a last-ditch effort to save your collective
grades… well, not a single one of you did better than
forty percent on that thing.”
There was a smattering of muttering and whispers
from among the assembled students. Dr. England
couldn’t help but feel depressed that the students
were surprised at the results he had just announced.
“Pass/Fail” 13

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
“I’ll be frank,” said Dr. England, “this does not reflect well on me as a professor. No, it does
not reflect well on me at all. If you little cusses failed, under my instruction, well… that
means I’m a bad teacher.”
Dr. England paused for effect again. He had some experience in amateur theater.
“Well, guess what?” said Dr. England, taking out a marker to write on the whiteboard. “I’m
not a bad teacher. I’m a pretty smart guy, I think.”
Dr. England went over to the whiteboard, and began writing on it in big, easily read letters.
“No,” he said, “get a doctorate in English, graduate at the top of the class, and then
produce a class of academic bottom-feeders in a community college, because they were
not a good teacher. Not that such a task is a great use of my time anyway.”
Dr. England tapped the word on the whiteboard
he had just written. “M-O-R-O-N-S,” he said out
loud. “That’s what you people are. I’m not one. So
the reason you all failed is pretty evident, I think.”
Just then, one of the students, a young black man
with dreadlocks, who was sitting in the back of
the class, said, “Dude, just… dude. You made us
watch old movies from the eighties, had us discuss
them in small groups, and then gave us some kind
of grammar test at the end of the quarter. What
did you think our final grade would be?”
“Pass/Fail” 14

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October 2023
“I don’t know,” said Dr. England smoothly. “What did you think your
final grade would be?”
The young man in dreadlocks muttered something unprintable, and
then leaned back in his chair, shaking his head.
“That’s what I thought,” said Dr. England. He turned to the class
again. “Look, I just want you all to know,” he said, “that I have
thoroughly hated, just hated, every second of the last quarter here, in
this classroom. I am just… speaking the truth.”
And with that, Dr. England picked up his still bundled-up laptop case
and backpack, and walked out of the classroom. “Have fun with
remedial education, morons,” said Dr. England. “I’m going to go do
something useful with my time.”
Dr. England then walked out of the classroom door, not bothering to
let the door close before he left.
Another one of the students in the classroom, a Vietnamese girl
named Tracy, peered over her desk, slightly confused. The student in
dreadlocks, whose name was Elijah, got up from his desk, and walked
over to one of the windows of the classroom. He pressed his face
against the window to get a clear idea of where Dr. England had gone.
“Pass/Fail” 15

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October 2023
“I’ll be,” said Elijah.
“Where’d the professor go?” said Tracy.
“What do we do now?”
“Uh…” said Elijah. “I think he’s joining
that BLM protest outside.”
The entire class sat there. They were all
eighteen or nineteen years of age.
Elijah, meanwhile, just stood there at
the window. He then turned around to
face the rest of the class, and said,
“So… I don’t know what anybody else
here thinks, but I… uh…”
Elijah walked up to the front of the
class. He cleared his throat.
“Uh, yeah,” he said. “I… uh… I, yeah, I
get the impression that the professor
just… I guess… just don't like learning
very much… you know?”
“Pass/Fail” 16

October 2023
SUN MON TUE WED THU
1 2 3 4 5 6
FRI
Fall
Session A
Ends
7
SAT
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15
Fall
Break
Begins
Fall
Session B
Begins
Fall
Break
Ends
16 17 18 19 20 21
22
23
24
25 26 27
28
29
30 31
01
02
03
04
05
06
07
08
09
10
11
12
13
14
15
- International Coffee Day
- World Farm Animals Day
- Mean Girls Day
- National Cinnamon Roll Day
- National Get Funky Day
- Fall Session A Ends
- International Day of Peaceful Communication
- International Newspaper Carrier Day
- Indigenous People’s Day
- Fall Break Begins
- Fall Session B Begins
- Fall Break Ends
- Ancestor’s Day
- International African Penguin Awareness Day
- Global Handwashing Day
16 - Global Cat Day
17 - Int’l Day for the Eradication of Poverty
18 - National Mashed Potato Day
19 - World Humanitarian Action Day
20 - International Chefs Day
21 - American Frog Day
22 - National Make a Dog’s Day
23 - Maha Navami
24 - World Polio Day
25 - Lung Health Day
26 - National Mule Day
27 - National Breadstick Day
28 - National Immigrants Day
29 - National Oatmeal Day
30 - National Candy Corn Day
31 - Halloween
Calendar
17

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Not Your Usual
Love Story
By: Sayalee
Chapter: 7
The Proposal
I would be lying if I said that my relationship with Oliver was smooth sailing after we got back
together. Like any other couple, we had our differences. Sometimes it seemed like we had a knack
for having huge fights and arguments about the smallest things. We are in August now, which
means we just had our two year anniversary and it’s been two months since we’ve been back
together. So we decided to take it a step further and move in together. It has been amazing and
stressful at the same time. It feels nice to have someone to go home to. But sharing a house means
sharing space. Both of us realized that we are not great at that. And both of us are really stubborn
to ever accept when the other is right. But at the same time, it is nice to have someone who can
help you during those stressful days. Plus, if one of us is going to be late, the other one prepares
dinner. We have also made it a habit to have dinner together whenever our schedule permits.
Chapter 7: The Proposal 18

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
It was the morning of August 18th when my alarm woke me up at 7 a.m. Like usual, I tried to find
Oliver to give him a hug before starting my day. To my surprise, his side of the bed was empty. I
got up and checked my phone to see a text message from him. Apparently he had some work he
needed to get to so he left early. I just sent an “okay” and got ready for my day. It was a busy day
but a routine one. Later in the day, it was 7:30 p.m when someone knocked on my door. I said
“come in” without looking.
“Hey” Oliver said.
“Hey! What are you doing here?”
“Come on. I am taking you out for some dinner. Want to have some sushi?”
“Yes please.”
“Let’s go.” We held hands and then walked out of the office together.
We reached the restaurant and ordered our food. We talked about
our respective days as we ate. It was something both of us were used
to: eating together and talking about our days.
As we got up he said “Come on, let’s take a walk.”
“You’ll see.”
“Sure. Where are we going?”
We walked for a good ten minutes and then we
stopped near the Somerset House fountains. He
knew the fountain was my favorite place. I went
inside but the water was turned off. I gave a
confused look to Oliver and he replied with a
shrug as if he was saying “I don't know why the
fountain is off.”
Chapter 7: The Proposal 19

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
I was about to ask him again when I heard music. It took me a few seconds but I
recognized the song. It was “Dancing With a Stranger!” I pulled Oliver to dance with me,
in the dry fountain plaza. He refused but I wasn’t taking no as an answer. I practically
dragged him and made him dance. After a few seconds, I lost track of what Oliver was
doing. I was just lost in the music. Just swaying and dancing, with a huge smile on my
face. As the song ended, I heard fireworks. So I looked up and sure enough, I could see
various colored fireworks. They looked spectacular. I called Oliver by saying “Hey look at
the…” I stopped short as I realized that he was exactly behind me, down on one knee.
I just stared at him with eyes wide open. He said, "Sara, from the moment I met you, you
drove me crazy. You filled a void in me that I didn’t even realize was there. From our first
date where we almost ran into my ex, to you meeting my friend, I fell in love with the way
you always have to have the bed sheet without wrinkles, your hundred different playlists
for everything, your unhealthy passion and obsession for Bollywood actors and your
ability to clean any dirty place, no matter how tired you are. You make me laugh, you
make me cry, but most of all you make me a better man. After our breakup, I realized
that I never wanted to be apart from you and I have been waiting for the right moment to
do this. I love you Sara. Will you marry me?"
Chapter 7: The Proposal 20

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
And I started crying. He looked at me with an amused expression which made me laugh. I
said yes and told him to get up. He slipped the ring on my finger, got up, kissed me, and
then I gave him the biggest hug. And I whispered in his ear, "I love you." And that's when the
water started gushing from the fountain and we got soaked to the bone. But we didn’t care
and we just basked in the glow of being newly engaged and stayed in each other's embrace.
Both of us were insanely happy as we started our journey home. I had a bounce in my step
and I kept on giving him random hugs or pecks and dancing in the street. I didn’t care who
saw us being crazy. We were fools in love, who just got engaged.
Once we got home we immediately changed into dry clothes.
“We need to call our parents.” I said.
“Mine already know. I requested their advice about the ring.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah.”
“Well they have good taste.”
“Really? I spent money to buy that ring and got
down on one knee for you and they get the credit?”
I just laughed at his pathetic attempt at being mad. “Okay fine. Thank
you my dear fiancé for proposing to me. Happy?”
He came near me and wrapped his arms around my waist and replied
“Yes, very much. Now let’s call your parents.”
“Okay let’s do it.”
“And my best friend.”
Chapter 7: The Proposal 21

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
We called up my parents and my sister first. My
mom picked the phone up first.
M: All of us are great. How are you, and how’s Oliver?
S : Hey Mom! How are you? How’s dad? And how’s Neha?
S: We are great. Actually, I wanted to talk to you guys. Are dad and Neha around?
M: Yeah, they are here. I’ll get them. Wait.
D: Hey Sara, how are you? Here’s Neha as well.
Them: Yeah.
(We wait for a few minutes)
S: Hey, Dad! Hey, Neha! I am great. I actually had some news to share, so are you ready?
M: Wonderful!! Show me the ring Sara. (I show her my ring). It is so
beautiful! Simple yet elegant. Exactly your style. Good choice, Oliver.
D: That’s amazing!! Congratulations to both of you!!
N: Sucker! Now you are stuck with Sara for your lifetime. Why
would you do that yourself Oliver? I thought you were smart.
S: (I show them the ring) I am engaged!!
S: Thank you Mom and Dad!! And Neha shut up.
O: Thank you Mr. and Mrs. Malhotra. And Neha, I love your sister very much and I
proposed to her because I am smart. And now I am looking forward to being your
brother-in-law. Maybe we can plan something to annoy your sister.
S: (I punch his arm lightly) Excuse me?! Don’t even think about it.
O: Wouldn’t dream of it babe. (He winked at Neha through the screen.)
Chapter 7: The Proposal 22

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October 2023
And then all of us proceeded to talk about every single
thing that had happened.
After hanging up the phone a while later, I said “that
went really well.”
“I know! Okay, you call your best friend. I have an early
morning, so good night, I love you.”
“Good night. I love you too.” He gives me a quick peck
and goes to the bedroom. While I just stare at him,
wondering how I got so damn lucky.
I called up my best friend and told her the whole story,
with every single detail of how he proposed to me. She
swooned at the right moments, and, before I knew it, it
was time for bed. After promising her that I will talk to
her more often and come visit her soon, I snuggled
close to Oliver and let sleep take over.
Chapter 7: The Proposal 23

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Arizona State University Traditions:
Fall Semester Edition
By: Leslie Madrid
Continued From
Cover Story
In honor of homecoming week, here are some ASU traditions to “spark” your excitement:
1. Lantern Walk
Help light up Tempe with one of the most memorable
(and oldest) traditions ASU has where students are
encouraged to climb to the top of the “A” mountain
with lanterns.
This favored tradition allows students, alumni, and
staff to follow in the footsteps of their ancestors
who attended ASU, whether it was back in 1885 when
the university opened its doors, or just last year.
ASU Traditions: Fall Semester Edition 24

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
2. Legends Luncheon
Are you a big football fan? Are you a big
Sun Devil fan? If so, this is the perfect
tradition for you to be involved in!
The Legends Luncheon is an event held
every year by ASU alumni, the Sun Devil
Club, and Sun Devil athletics to
celebrate the football legacy dating all
the way back to 1971.
To join these legacies on October 17 at
the Omni Tempe Hotel, you can
purchase your tickets here.
3. Parade
If you like the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, then
you’ll love this one.
Okay… Well, maybe they don’t actually compare, but
who doesn’t love a parade?! The ASU homecoming
parade is definitely not one to miss, especially since it’s
the one of the biggest events where you can show your
Sun Devil pride. The parade features student
organization floats, the ASU Marching Bands, and even
local celebrities to help this tradition come together.
In case I haven’t convinced you how awesome this
sounds, check out some of the photos from last year’s
homecoming parade.
ASU Traditions: Fall Semester Edition 25

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
Images from the ASU Homecoming Parade
4. Block Party
What better way to show your ASU
pride than enjoying some food,
giveaways and games, all brought to
you by the different departments and
organizations. The Block Party is an
event hosted on Old Main’s lawn going
all the way down University Drive right
after the Parade.
This fun-filled event has something for
everyone to enjoy, all the while making
people of all ages feel like they’re right
at home. It’s the perfect place to
reminisce about past memories with
old friends or make new ones with
someone right around the block!
ASU Traditions: Fall Semester Edition 26

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
5. Sun Devil Football
While football games aren’t necessarily considered as
traditions, there’s nothing like this Sun Devil filled event.
Throughout the duration of the game, there are a couple of
different traditions for participants to watch or partake in.
At the start of the game, the ASU community is encouraged
to welcome the team with their pitchforks up, to the song
“Thunderstruck” by AC/DC. Moving on to kick off, Sun Devils
are encouraged to shake their keys and make some noise to
show some team spirit, which is followed by Sparky doing
some push ups for every point on the scoreboard.
And that’s not even
half of it- for more
traditions, check out
the educational
outreach and student
services page.
Being an online student can make participating in
these traditions hard, so with your help Online Sun
Devils, let’s come up with our own!
ASU Traditions: Fall Semester Edition 27

Volume 08 Issue 02
October 2023
How to: Recover from Sexual Assault
Piecing yourself back together after Sexual Assault
Rising from the Ashes:
A Guide to Healing after Sexual Assault
Trigger Warning: This article discusses sexual
assault, and may be triggering for some readers
In the summer of 2021, I was sexually assaulted in the parking lot of my gym. This was
not the first time that I had been sexually assaulted, but it was the most violent and it
ended up leaving the most impact on me. It was also the only time that I chose to go to
the hospital, file a police report, tell someone what had happened and seek help.
Following the assault, I remember feeling hopeless and lost. I knew that I couldn’t heal
on my own so I turned to the internet. I tried to find an article that would tell me exactly
what I needed to do. However, all I found at the time were articles filled with medical
jargon and those were not what I was looking for. I didn’t find comfort or healing in
articles that broke down what happened to me—I already knew what happened to me.
Within this article I have outlined the steps that I took to begin my healing journey. I
have mixed in my own personal experiences as well, to avoid coming off impersonal like
the articles that I had read. It is my hope that you can find solace within this guide as I
have over the years.
Rising From the Ashes 28

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October 2023
1: Don’t Blame Yourself.
Following sexual assault you may be met with questions that cause self blame such as;, ”What were
you wearing? Why were you with them? Why didn’t you do more?, etc. These questions may come
from people that you know, those in society and you may even ask them yourself.
Antonieta Rico, army resilience directorate, touches on the prevalence of victim blaming in her article
It really wasn’t your fault: How Understanding the Brain’s Response to Trauma Can Lessen Victim-
Blaming and Self-Blame. “Lack of understanding by fellow… friends, Family… and law enforcement of
the brain’s response to trauma can lead to victim blaming…and impact their ability to get support or
justice. Survivors' own lack of knowledge of these trauma responses leads to shame, guilt, and selfblame”.
You must not blame yourself for what happened to you. The clothes you were wearing, the place
you were at, the people that you were with, and what you did or didn't do does not excuse what
happened to you.
Personally, I felt as though I was to blame for what happened to me because of
the interactions that followed. At the hospital I was met with these questions by
staff and law enforcement. The forensic nurses added onto that sense of shame
with their side conversations, whispers and stares. Certain people that were close
to me at the time chipped away pieces of my remaining self-worth with their
questions and comments as well. Whether these individuals realized it or not,
(whether it was intentional or not) the way they looked at me, the things they
said to or about me, and how they carried themselves around me sent me into
what felt like a never ending cycle of self-blame, shame, disgust and guilt.
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2: Talk about what happened.
When you are ready, talk to someone that you trust about what happened. A professional that
specializes in sexual assault or trauma will be able to equip you with the coping mechanisms, tools
and resources that you will need to recover.
However, if you are hesitant to speak with a professional early on you can always reach out to
someone close to you i.e. friends or a family member. There is a chance that someone you know
may have experienced a traumatic event as well, and can understand what you are going through.
With that being said, at some point I encourage you to reach out to a professional.
Charlie Health Editorial Team discusses the benefits of therapy for sexual assault survivors,“If you are
a survivor…seeking treatment is crucial for your overall mental health and well-being. You do not
have to continue to suffer from flashbacks, distressing emotions, nightmares, shame, guilt, or any
other symptoms you might feel”.
It is important to note that you may have to meet with a few professionals before you find someone
that is right for you (there is nothing wrong with switching professionals until you find someone that
makes you feel comfortable, seen and heard).
I chose to reach out to friends and family members first. I was afraid to reach
out to a therapist because I associated therapy with admitting that I had a
problem. Therapy also meant that I would have to face what happened to me. I
quickly realized that my loved ones would not be able to give me the support
that I needed and I turned to a trauma specialist. Therapy was painful at first
—she had me recount what had happened to me every few sessions, she unlocked
memories that my brain wanted to shield me from. But therapy was also freeing
—she taught me about my brain and what the brain does in response to
trauma, she taught me that my reaction to trauma was ok and it was normal,
she taught me coping mechanisms for my flashbacks and nightmares, and she
diagnosed me. The traumas that I experienced left me with Post-Traumatic
Stress Disorder , and PTSD left me with traits that I don’t particularly like but
I gained the ability to feel and live again.
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3. When you’re ready, let yourself feel.
It can be easy to bottle up all of your feelings and choose to let yourself go numb after a
traumatic event.
You may think, Having experienced sexual assault itself is painful enough, why should I
prolong that pain by reliving what happened to me? Why let myself feel my feelings when I
can occupy myself with things that make the pain go away?
Bottling up your feelings means that you will feel it eventually. Eventually those bottled up
feelings will cause you to explode, which will only prolong your pain. Allowing yourself to
feel your feelingsa little bit here and there will allow you to heal.
Initially, I tried to act as though nothing had happened to me. I bottled up my
feelings which led to emotional outbursts and a short fuse. Then I turned to
negative coping mechanisms such as isolation, eating disorders, suicidal idealation
and self sabotage. Locking myself up in my depression room that was filled with
dirty dishes and clothes, skipping meals, wishing that my assaulter had killed me
and watching my college grade point average dwindle was not the answer. I ended
up feeling everything all at once; I cried and screamed into my pillows until I had
no more tears left to shed, my throat was raw, my voice was gone and I did so for
weeks. After a while I started to feel better—feeling my feelings was painful in the
moment, but it also released my pain bit by bit as well.
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Rape and sexual assault hotlines
U.S: National Sexual Assault Hotline – A confidential, free 24/7
hotline for one-on-one crisis support. Call 1-800-656-HOPE
or chat online. (RAINN)
UK: Find Your Nearest Rape Crisis Services – In England and
Wales, call the rape crisis helpline at 0808-802-9999 or find
your nearest facility (Rape Crisis)
Australia: Services and Support – Call the national helpline at
1800-737-732 or find services near you. (1800RESPECT)
Canada: Canadian Assault Centres and Services – Find a hotline
or crisis centre near you. (Chatelaine)
Sources:
https://www.army.mil/article/241611/it_really_wasnt_your_fault_how_understanding_
the_brains_response_to_trauma_can_lessen_victim_blaming_and_self_blame
https://www.charliehealth.com/post/what-is-the-best-therapy-for-sexual-assault-victims
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Meet the Team
Writers
Editors
Natasha Geiger
Kitana Ford
Sayalee Chivate
Leslie Madrid
Annelise Markussen
Levi Sweeney
Designers
The Spark Board of Directors
Imani Mitchell
Laura
Brittany Christian
Virginia
Savannah Tyk LeDoux
Board of Directors
Leslie Madrid
Editor in Chief
Workshop Team
Sayalee Chivate
Annelise Markussen
Advisory Team
Brianne Frazier
Roxanne Wilcox
Annelise Markussen
Director of Editing
Sayalee Chivate
Director of Writing
April Fan
Director of Graphic Design
Sydne Ware
Director of Communications
The Spark Team
The End