ding if you're stressed! - The Retriever Weekly

volume 45 issue 24 TuesDAY APRil 26, 2011
News 01 opiNioN 06 arts 10 sports 18
retrieverweekly.com
Former student imprisoned by Qaddafi's government
FBI continues search for Matt VanDyke—missing since March 12
TRW Editorial Staff
UMBC alumnus Matthew VanDyke,
who is a freelance journalist, flew to Libya
earlier last month. He has been missing
since March 12. He is among the 15 reporters
either missing or in government
custody.
VanDyke graduated from UMBC in
2002 with a degree in political science,
and received his graduate degree in security
studies from Georgetown University
in 2004. He has written for several news
organizations and has worked an inde-
Integrity of story in Three Cups of Tea challenged
Memoir chosen for the 2009 New Student Book Experience takes a hit on 60 Minutes
Olivia Ignacio
Senior Staff Writer
The popular memoir Three Cups
of Tea has been under heavy fire after
a shocking 60 Minutes broadcast
reported that key parts of the book
might have been fabricated.
The memoir, co-authored by
Greg Mortenson and David Oliver
Relin, follows the exploits of philanthropist
and U.S. military adviser
pendent foreign correspondent and filmmaker
as well.
The 32-year-old arrived in Libya on
March 6, and had been in daily contact
with his mother Sharon VanDyke until
March 12. During that phone conversation,
VanDyke said to his mother, “Mom,
I can’t talk now; it’s noisy. I can’t talk now.
Can you call me tomorrow?”
When she tried to call back the next
day, he did not answer his phone. However,
he transmitted GPS coordinates that
pointed to the city of Brega. VanDyke has
not been heard from since. On April 4, a
Libyan friend of VanDyke's contacted his
Mortenson. It tracks Mortenson’s
mountain climbing and establishing
schools for girls in Pakistan and
Afghanistan. Over 14 million copies
of the book have been sold since its
1996 publication.
The book helped spawn Mortenson’s
charity, the Central Asia Institute
(CAI), and has earned him
millions of dollars to date, as well
as two Nobel Peace Prize nominations
and status as a world renown
mother and informed her that VanDyke
is believed to be captured by Qaddafi’s
forces.
According to Sharon VanDyke, someone
else is in possession of her son’s
cell phone. She has repeatedly called
his phone and often an Arabic man has
answered, denying that the phone is
VanDyke’s. He says that she has dialed
the wrong number and refuses to give
any more information. Yet, according to
phone company records, that phone is in
fact, VanDyke’s.
The Baltimore native, who can speak
Arabic, had entered Libya with press
courtesy sharon vandyke
VanDyke graduated in 2002 with a degree in political science. He served as the Business
Manager of, and a writer for, The Retriever Weekly.
humanitarian folk hero.
The 60 Minutes report questioned
in particular a significant anecdote
in the book where Mortenson gotlost
while scaling the mountain K2
and was subsequently saved by villagers
in Korphe, Pakistan. Mortenson
vowed to repay their kindness
by building them a school, but was
then kidnapped by the Taliban for
eight days.
Jon Krakauer, best-selling author
credentials hoping to write a book on the
conflict in the Middle East. However, he
is not new to that part of the world.Van-
Dyke has traveled to 13 Middle Eastern
countries in the past, including Afghanistan,
Turkey, and Libya. In fact, he believes
he is the first American to enter Libya via
motorcycle (in 2006) after Qaddafi came
to power.
Political Science Professor Tom Schaller
who had VanDyke in three of his courses
noted, “Matt was a great student and is a
fantastic writer...He stopped by my office
during the holiday season in late 2010 to
check in. He's very smart, very adventur-
and Mortenson’s former financial
supporter, denounced this story as a
lie, and told 60 Minutes that Mortenson
had not even heard about a
village called Korphe until a year
afterward.
Mortenson denied the accusations
in an interview with Outside magazine,
though he did acknowledge
that some of the events in the memoir
were compressed for the sake of
an easy-to-follow narrative for read-
ous and will, I'm sure, return home safely
soon.”
VanDyke graduated summa cum laude
from UMBC. He was a columnist for, and
the Business Manager of The Retriever
Weekly.
Richard Byrne, Editor of UMBC Magazine,
has brought this to the attention
of the Committee to Protect Journalists
(CPJ).
“When I alerted the committee to Matthew
VanDyke's case, they issued an alert
within a single day. The CPJ really is an
> see VANDYKe [3]
courtesy chocolateheaven-online.com
Co-author Greg Mortenson denied accusations of fabricating the events in the
memoir, Three Cups of Tea.
ers.
“If indeed [the accusations] are
true, it challenges academic integrity,”
said Jill Randles, Assisstant
Vice Provost for Undergraduate Education
and coordinator of the New
Student Book Experience at UMBC.
The memoir was chosen as the Fall
2009 New Student Book Experience
for incoming classes after receiving
several nominations from both fac-
“Fat Bottom Girls...” Why used books can umBC senior gets Retrievers get ready to men’s lax wins it for
be strangely smelly. book published
go 1-2 in decathlon the seniors
> see memoir [4]

2 News APRil 26, 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
Put to shame by your host momma while dancing
Courtney Ring
editorial Staff
The temperature in the city
continued to drop after our return
from our tour to Finland and
Sweden. December was now fairly
upon us. Classes were beginning to
wind towards their end, and we began
to hold our breath in anticipation
of final exams. Oddly enough,
homesickness only really started to
set in (at least in my case) at this
point. We had been out of the United
States for almost four months,
and as the holidays approached, I
wanted to be home preparing with
my family.
Some of this was in part helped,
I think, by the difference between
the Russian and American holiday
timetable. Most of the western
world switched to the Gregorian
calendar in the seventeenth and
eighteenth centuries. Up until
1917, however, Russia remained
on the Julian calendar and the
Russian Orthodox Church still
uses the Julian calendar to reckon
the dates for religious holidays
like Christmas. Because there is a
13-day discrepancy between the
two calendars, Russians celebrate
Christmas on 25 December Julian,
which is actually 7 January Gregorian.
Thus, Russians technically
celebrate New Year before Christmas,
and although my brain knew
that this wasn’t a problem, it still
made me vaguely anxious that
somehow Christmas would get lost
in the rush to the New Year. This
anxiety was perhaps not altogether
irrational, as we had already had to
fend for ourselves for Thanksgiving
Day.
Thanksgiving Day is not a Russian
holiday, and the concept of
buying and preparing a whole
turkey, along with the copious
amounts of stuffing, cranberries,
pies, and vegetables is also pretty
alien. Turkey, in fact, was pretty
scarce. In most grocery stores, the
best you could do was a cut of duck
meat or perhaps chicken. Despite
this lack of encouragement, most
of us still felt the need to celebrate
somehow. Oliver did so by bringing
home a whole pumpkin that he
bought on a whim at a market and
making pumpkin pie from scratch.
His host family wasn’t too keen on
the idea until after they had tasted
it. “What was their reaction?” we
all wanted to know. “They wanted
me to make another,” he laughed.
Those of us who felt particularly in
the mood went out for dinner on
the evening of Thanksgiving. So
there we were, six Americans celebrating
Thanksgiving in Russia at
a Chinese restaurant.
New Year and Christmas, on the
other hand, are a big deal and the
streets everywhere reflected this
reality. Colored and flashing lights
arched over almost every major
thoroughfare in the city. Strings of
colored lights outlined the length of
the bridges between the mainland
and the islands. Giant trees covered
in lights appeared in front of most
of the cathedrals and in the massive
expanse before the Winter Palace.
Out in front of Smolniy Institute,
workers erected a tree around
whose base Father Christmas piloted
a ship pulled by Rudolph.
Anticipation of the holidays was
rising in our group as we counted
off the days until leaving for home.
As the temperatures dropped, snow
filtered down over the city, temporarily
hiding the mud.
Our very last expedition as a
group was to the Yusupov Palace
on the Moika River in St. Petersburg.
Not only was this palace a
grand museum, but it was also the
site of the murder of Rasputin. Our
guides walked us through the main
part of the house before leading
us through a small corridor into a
separate suite of rooms. Here, supposedly,
the murder took place.
A group of nobles, led by Felix
Yusupov, worried that the peasantmonk
Grigory Rasputin was threatening
the stability of the Russian
state, lured him to this separate
part of the house. There they fed
him cakes laced with cyanide, and
then, when that failed to kill him,
shot him three to four times before
dumping his body into the Moika.
Apparently, however, the autopsy
concluded that he had merely died
of hypothermia and found neither
gunshot wounds nor traces of cyanide.
On that haunted house note,
we were whisked away to have
lunch with our host families. As
we walked, we passed an abandoned
shipyard situated on a small
island in the Moika. There is talk
about turning it into a community
center or a park. However, as Irina
Borisovna dryly remarked, “They
have to make sure no one steals
all the money and supplies in the
process.” During lunch, a group
of performers entered and began
teaching us traditional games and
dances. When it came to the dancing,
our little Russian host mothers
put us all sadly to shame! As these
dances involved a lot of jumping
up and down and back and forth,
most of us ended up on our rearends,
laughing helplessly and gasping
for breath.
Our last week before the end of
term we spent roaming the city, saying
goodbye to our favorite places
and racing to buy last minute gifts
for family and friends. Marija and
I made a pilgrimage to St. Isaacs
Cathedral to say goodbye. In contrast
to the dim stone and marble
interior of Kazanskiy, or the heavy
gilt of Peter and Paul Cathedral, the
interior of St. Isaacs is a fireburst
of blazing color. Brilliant frescoes
adorn the walls and ceiling, and
only as you approach the iconostasis
do you encounter the more
somber tones of the icons. Tracy,
Marija, Eva, and I also met up one
afternoon at the big department
store on Nevsky Prospect, Gostinniy
Dvor. Its the closest thing I saw
there to an American-style mall.
Eva, however, took us behind Gostinniy
Dvor to a hole-in-the-wall
store. Ducking through a dim door,
we found ourselves in the middle
of a jostling crowd at what might
have been an indoor bazaar. “Hold
on tight to your wallets,” Eva cautioned
us before we threaded our
way through another door and out
into an icy courtyard full of crazy
little stores piled higgledy-piggledy
on top of one another. Here were
souvenirs and all sorts of other
goods at knock-off prices, and the
place was bustling with customers
and people loading and unloading
boxes from dirty trucks. We stuck
close together, as the place has a
pretty sketchy reputation, but were
able to find a few things that we
wanted to take home for family and
friends.
The city that last week was heartbreakingly
beautiful. It had snowed
at the beginning of the week and
the temperature had dropped so
fast that it did not melt, leaving a
lacy veneer of ice over the city. It
got cold enough, in fact, that the
Neva even froze over, the currents
beneath the surface shoving the ice
floes up over and underneath one
another, resembling nothing so
much as a jagged moonscape. The
sun even appeared during those
last five days, and the city sparkled
under its cold, diamond light.
Our exams finished, and we said
goodbye. The sun set one last time
over the city, and we prepared to
go.
Comments may be sent to
me@retrieverweekly.com.
courtesy courtney ring

Journalist captured in Libya
April 18:
> from VANDYKE [1]
amazing voice for journalists who are
placed in danger simply by doing their
jobs,” explained Byrne.
According to Byrne, the conflict zones
in Libya are fluid with rebels taking over
large swaths and then the government
snatching them back: “It all happened
retriever Act Center
Theft from Buildings
Three UMBC students reported that
someone had removed their personal
property from the locker area.
Fine Arts Bldg
Theft from Buildings
A UMBC student reported that camera
equipment belonging to the university was
taken from a secured storage-type locker.
Fine Arts Bldg
Destruction of Property
A UMBC student reported that his combination
lock on a locker in the same area
as reported above was damaged in what
is believed to be an attempt to enter the
locker.
April 19:
Admin Bldg 1st Floor
Theft from Coin Oper Machine
A UMBC police officer on routine patrol
found a soda machine that had been
forced open and drinks were removed.
The ReTRieveR Weekly
SGA Election Results: UMBC
sets new voter turnout record
Molly Bradtke
contributing writer
You voted, and the results are in: Catie
Collins and Dylan Cook will take over as
SGA President and Executive Vice President
for next year.
Collins and Cook, also known as
“Team Coco,” took the election after a
vigorous campaign with 876 votes. Matthew
McNey and Charles Mason III,
Team Coco’s closest contenders, received
759 votes.
Speaking on the campaign trail, Collins
says, “It was wonderfully challenging.
It definitely kept us on our game,
and it was inspiring to see just how many
students care about their campus enough
to pour that much time and effort into
campaigning.”
Cook is looking forward to the coming
year: “I am fully confident that we
will approach this upcoming year with
the same amount of positive energy that
fueled our campaign.”
Collins echoed the same emphasis on
the team effort that went into their campaign
and what is to come next year.
With 2,521 votes from students this
year, UMBC set a new record. With a
voter turnout of 24.7%, UMBC beat
College Park’s turnout of 14.55%. Vot-
quickly and created even greater uncertainties
for VanDyke and all other reporters
in the area.”
In addition to the CPJ, Maryland Senators
Cardin and Mikulski, the FBI, and
the United States Federal Government
are aware of VanDyke’s situation and
working to find him.
ing was held Monday, April 18 through
Wednesday, April 20, with candidates
working to promote themselves and encourage
students to vote online.
David Hoffman, Assistant Director of
Student Life for Civic Agency and the
advisor to the SGA, is very proud of the
candidates and the campaigns they ran.
“I think the key ingredients in UMBC’s
run of great turnout in recent yearshave
been the diversity of both SGA and the
student body, and SGA’s seriousness of
purpose,” he says.
Joining Collins and Cook, Damani
Lewis is next year’s Vice President for
Student Organizations, while Kayleswari
Ramu will resume her role as Treasurer.
The SGA Senate for next year will
comprise Chisom Ebinama, Hamza Siddiqui,
Obie Chinemere, Gift Jayakar, Ben
Ofori, Kaitlyn Snyder, Justin Lane, Mike
Jones, Amday Wolde, Alex Gaines, and
Fialelei Matthews.
Siddiqui, a freshman, wants to build
on UMBC’s reputation. “Our influence
is growing,” he says, “and I want to continue
to build on that in our community
and within the state.”
Among other initiatives, the SGA intends
to take on plans to maintain free
hour and increase health and safety for
students on campus.
courtesy sharon vandyke
“We are asking everyone to keep Matthew
and his family in their thoughts and
prayers,” said President Hrabowski.
Additional reporting by Alethea Paul.
Comments may be sent to
news@retrieverweekly.com.
The Finance Board will be led by Rosy
Chirayath, Samy Rabb, Joshua Day, Michelle
Kuah, and Morgan Russo.
Both Referendum A and B received
approval from students and will be
implemented next year. Approval of Referendum
A eliminates the Chief of Staff
position from the list of permanent SGA
positions, allowing for the President to
decide whether to include a Chief of Staff
among his cabinet appointments.
Referendum B, supported by 61.4%
of the vote, removes the minimum GPA
requirements for officers not in formal
leadership positions; requires that officers
in formal positions not be under
disciplinary suspension; and increases
the minimum GPA for the SGA Treasurer
to 2.5.
A public inauguration ceremony will
take place at noon on May 11 on the
Commons Terrace. The winners’ term
as the newly elected leaders of SGA will
commence May 15.
Additional reporting by Editorial Staff.
Comments may be sent to
bmolly1@umbc.edu.
April 21:
Hilltop Cir. & Hilltop rd.
CDS, Possession (Marijuana)
CDS Paraphernalia Possession
During a routine traffic stop, a UMBC
officer detected an odor of marijuana
coming from the vehicle. The operator
was found to be possessing CDS and CDS
paraphernalia. A 20-year-old UMBC student
was arrested and charged with CDS
violations.
21.4%
19.0%
19.0%
11.9%
11.9%
9.50%
7.10%
APRIL 26, 2011 News 3
If you had the space to
build anything on UMBC’s
campus regardless of size,
what would it be?
A legit movie theater
A Quidditch stadium
An ice-skating rink on
top of Math/Psych
An igloo on the Quad
A monument for
Hrabowski
A cowbell (ding if you’re
stressed!)
A casino in the Admin
building
Vote in next week’s poll at retrieverweekly.com
April 22:
Hilltop Cir. & Walker Ave.
Destruction of Property
False Statement to Officer
A UMBC student flagged down a UMBC
police officer to report damage to his vehicle.
The student reported he parked his
vehicle on campus, and when he returned
to the vehicle, the rear window had been
smashed out. While this officer was investigating
this case, another UMBC police officer
was checking with Baltimore County
Police Department to see if they had had
any similar cases. This investigation determined
that the same UMBC student was
involved in an incident in Baltimore County
where he had fueled his vehicle but forgot
to remove the nozzle before driving away.
This caused the hose to snap, breaking
out the rear window of the vehicle. As a
result, a 20-year-old UMBC student was
arrested and charged with False Statement
to a Police Officer.

4 News APRil 26, 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
SGA NEWS
Initiative will help students in financial emergencies
Richard Blissett
Sga correSpondent
Since October of 2010, members of
SGA have been working with administrators
from the Office of Institutional
Advancement and other various offices
to implement a fund to help students,
who are going through emergency situations
and thus are unable to continue
their studies at UMBC.
In 2009-2010, more than 61% of fulltime
undergraduate students applied for
need-based federal aid, and only 76%
of them received what they had asked.
These numbers are from a presentation
by Monique Armstrong from the Office
of Institutional Advancement, and they
show that the average student needs
help paying for school. Throughout the
“Fat bottom girls, you make the rockin’ world go ‘round!”
Emily Jackson
health correSpondent
As another school year comes to a
close and the seniors leave, allowing for
the freshman to move up a grade level,
it is nothing out of the ordinary to reflect
upon the past year.
Freshmen: was college as scary as you
imagined it to be? If one of the things
you were worried about was gaining the
much dreaded freshman 15, and obsessively
watched your weight, you could
have possibly developed an eating disorder.
Dr. Mary Boggiano from the University
of Alabama at Birmingham, says warnings
from parents, college personnel,
and peers may cause students to adopt
dangerous management techniques to
lose weight. These include binging and
purging their food or simply not eating.
86% of all women are diagnosed with
an eating disorder by age 20.
Boggiano believes that eating disorders
are more of a type of mental illness
than they are physical: “People who
last semester, the SGA has been collecting
stories from students who would
have benefited from a fund like this to
better understand the situations people
are going through. Submitters have cited
reasons ranging from health to family,
and it is hoped that the way in which
the fund is administered will account for
these kinds of situations. Additional stories
are still appreciated and can be submitted
at http://tinyurl.com/share-a-story.
The idea originated from a campaign
at the University of Maryland, College
Park that appeared to have to same goal.
This program, called Keep Me Maryland,
is a donation-based fund that raises
additional financial aid dollars to help
meet the urgent needs of students hit
so hard by the economic downturn that
they may not be able to stay in school
develop anorexia often have family histories
of anxiety disorders.”
When people suffer from anorexia,
for example, they try to control their
own weight by weighing themselves and
exercising obsessively, and eating very
small portions. Over time, anorexia not
only shows itself in physical symptoms,
low blood pressure, malnourished appearance,
irregular menstruation cycles
in women, thinning of the bones, hair,
and nails, but in mental symptoms.
These include depression, anxiety, and
obsessive behavior.
On the other hand, bulimics constantly
feel out of control with their portion
size. In addition to physical abuse
of the body, such as tooth decay, kidney
problems, and inflammation of the
throat, bulimics also suffer depression
and anxiety.
Because of these circumstances, these
disorders are impossible to overcome
quickly. While there are anti-depressants
can help with the psychological effects,
Boggiano also recommends what she
calls a team approach to treating eat-
(according to the Keep Me Maryland
website). The UMBC team working on
this initiative met with College Park
representatives in December to discuss
their implementation, but soon discovered
that the details of how that program
worked would not fit the ideals of the
UMBC program. With that, the group
moved forward to create UMBC’s own
program.
The team has also been in communication
with the Office of Financial Aid
and Scholarships. One of the biggest
questions that this project raises, besides
the question of where the money
is coming from, is whether or not it will
be used by students. There are already
many scholarship opportunities available
to students that need them; however,
many go underused. The SGA is
Health and Wellness Fair opens
to students for the first time
Corey Johns
editorial Staff
For the first time, the UMBC Health
and Wellness Initiative opened their
Health and Wellness Fair for the student
population to better spread the message
of both physical and mental health to
UMBC's entire community.
What started out as Wellness in the
Workplace, a program to help UMBC
faculty and staff members ease the stress
of their lives, the program evolved and
added a student aspect in 2008 after discovering
that the UMBC SGA had a chapter
called health and wellness. The SGA
wanted to join together, and have since
created the UMBC Health and Wellness
Initiative. Last Tuesday, the group held a
fair in the University Center Ballroom to
stress the importance of being stress free.
The fair highlighted various student
organizations that focus on health, including
Students for Ballistic Health,
which hopes to be recognized as a student
organization next fall and hope to
increase campus spirit as a byproduct
of physical health, as well as campus organizations
such as UMBC athletics, the
UMBC police, Chartwells, UMBC health
services, and other organizations that
focus on the health and wellness of the
UMBC community.
But more than just focusing on the
physical and mental health of UMBC
students and faculty the Health and
Wellness Initiative invited various banks
from around the campus community to
show shot both student and faculty deals
on loans and bank around because they
wanted to also focus on financial wellness
on people as money is one of the biggest
reasons for stress in both adults and students.
At the fair Chartwells Executive Chef
Allison Trinkle spoke about the future
plans that Chartwells has to improve student
health. Fresh Fusions has moved to
a vegan and vegetarian menu primarily
featuring Indian food while Salsarita’s has
created a rice bowl meal deal and Mondo
Subs’ has created a deal that allows any
sub to be made into a salad. The gelato
counter is also going to be transitioning
from their sugar-based dessert to more
fruit and yogurt-based smoothies. These
changes have occurred because Trinkle
said she has listened to the requests from
the students and is open to any new requests
students may have. Students can
send any new ideas or request to Trinkle
via email at atrinkle@umbc.edu.
Comments can be sent to
cjohns2@umbc.edu.
ing disorders like anorexia. Term approaches
involve urgent medical care,
therapy, and advice from professional
nutritionists.
While the seriousness of eating disorders
is understood, many aren’t aware of
their exact severity. According to Boggiano,
eating disorders are more dangerous
to its sufferers than major depression or
schizophrenia.
Dr. Kimberly Dennis, medical director
of a residential treatment facility in
Illinois says, “Anorexia nervosa has the
highest mortality rate of any mental illness
up to 20%.”
If you’re not going to smoke Marlboro’s,
torture your liver with Jack
Daniels every other night, or jump off
the Brooklyn Bridge, there’s no reason to
starve yourself. Because it’ll kill you. Or
at least, kill your figure and good looks.
And we dont want to look like we’ve
been deprived of food for the past three
years. We want to look hot.
Comments can be sent to
emjacks1@umbc.edu.
reaching out to students to figure out
why this happens and how to possibly
encourage students to take advantage of
the resources available to them. This has
evolved to include efforts to inform students
of the current scholarship opportunities,
especially through the advising
system.
The fundraising campaign for this
program will kick off on Wednesday,
April 17, and students (and alumni)
may donate until June 30. The Resident
Student Association has worked with
the team and is organizing a campaign
challenge for residential communities.
The winning community will receive
recognition at RSA’s annual Midnight
Dessert on May 12.
In addition, Dylan Cook is working
with administration in the Campus Card
Office to allow students to donate using
campus cash. Currently, it costs $15.00
to take campus cash off of a campus
card, so the team hopes that students,
especially graduating seniors, will consider
donating to this fund. The goal for
this year is to raise $1,000 and attract
200 donors.
More information about this initiative
can be found online at this website: http://
alumni.umbc.edu/studentgivinghome.
Questions about giving can be directed
to Dayna Carpenter at dayna@
umbc.edu.
Comments may be sent to
am32283@gmail.com.
Critics contest
validity of memoir
> from memoir [1]
ulty and students. On November 10,
2009 co-author David Oliver Relin
came to UMBC to discuss Mortenson’s
story and to sign books.
“In terms of our process of selecting
the book, we didn’t have any of
this recent information at the time.
Everything was glowing and positive,”
said Randles. “In the future we
certainly will play close attention.”
“It would be scandalous if he
made parts of it up, especially for all
of the students who read the book,”
said senior Media and Communica-
tion Studies major Sad Brown.
In addition to fabricating stories,
Mortenson is accused of mishandling
his charity’s money. Krakauer
told 60 Minutes that he uses the CAI,
which has attracted $60 million in
donations since the memoir came
out, as his private ATM.
Comments may be sent
to oliviai1@umbc.edu.
courtesy targetwoman.com

A crowd of supporters (above) gather the National Aquarium at Baltimore’s Inner Harbor to
honor William Schaefer on Monday afternoon. Mrs. Schaefer (below) addresses the aquarium’s
curator in front of the spectators. Mr. Schaefer was a major supporter of the city as well as the
aquarium itself.
The ReTRieveR Weekly
Abnet shiferAw — trw
SUMMER
S E S S I O N 2 0 1 1
Summer Session I
May 31 – August 19
4, 6, 8 and 12 week courses
Register through May 30
See the schedule of classes at:
umbc.edu/summer
NOW
Stay on track to graduate on time! In-person,
online, and hybrid courses are available this
summer to best meet your needs and move
you towards graduation. Courses are offered
on campus and at The Universities at Shady
Grove in Rockville.
Summer Session II
July 11 – August 19
4 and 6 week courses
Register through July 10
Receive last minute updates by texting
“UMBC1” to 70359
APRIL 26, 2011 News 5
HIRING: Good Comics,
Illustrators,
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6 APRIL 26, 2011
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The ReTRieveR Weekly
opinion
Is it the food, or the people who serve it?
I ordered a quesadilla the other day.
After frying it for a few minutes, the
server silently plopped it down in front
of me, spilling my side of chips and
salsa, and veered away before I could
say thank you.
I guess she didn’t really like me. Either
that, or she was having a bad day.
I have been at UMBC for three years
and eat at the Commons on a regular
basis. This happens all the time. And if
you ask other people who eat on campus,
most of them will agree.
For example, if the listed hours state
that something opens at 7:30 a.m., and
I get there at 7:45 a.m., I expect that I
can order a cup of coffee. Not that I’ll
be told to wait, and another 10 minutes
later, they’re still not ready. Every day.
I also find it rude when I’m reciting
my order for a latte and in the middle
of my sentence, you turn around and
start talking to your colleague. For six
minutes. I’ve counted.
This is not to argue that everyone acts
this way. A lot of dining service workers
are very nice; you sing Rihanna to
me when I come to the dining hall for
breakfast. On a serious note, there are
some of you who are unquestionably
professional and can serve as models
for your colleagues.
But it’s a bit creepy when you leer at
me (or peer down the other girl’s shirt)
when I’m trying to give you my order.
And please, don’t make up nicknames
for me. I’m not your babe, love, or
sweetheart.
The unfortunate thing is that I’ve
mentioned this to a lot of my friends
and classmates in hopes that they’ll say
something along the lines of “What?
Really?” Instead, their eyes widen,
heads bobble like one of those batteryoperated
dolls, and they agree with my
observations.
A few years ago, my English Comp
professor told us to eat somewhere
and then write a review. My classmate
convinced me to order a veggie burger
at the Grill. Since there weren’t any on
hand, a worker snatched one out of the
freezer, and popped it in the microwave
for about a minute before dumping it
on top of my fries. I spent that night
hurling up everything I’d eaten. That
wasn’t the only time that happened,
either.
And it’s exasperating when we hear
phrases such as, “May I help you?” or
“We don’t got that!” or “What!” every
day.
We understand that serving rambunctious
college students all day can
get tedious. But the thing is, after a long
day of classes and work, we’re tired too,
and we don’t want to play Katie-Couric-interviews-Sarah-Palin.
We politely
tell you our choices, make changes if
something isn’t available, pay for our
meal, and remember to thank you for
the hard work that you do.
In return, all we ask for is a little respect,
please. With all deliberate speed.
Thanks.
The magic & mystery of used book stores
Used book stores are full of old treasures--and super low prices.
Julie Meier
staff writer
Over the weekend, I went home and
went shopping with my mom. It’s the
same shopping center I’ve been going to
since the age of five, but on this visit, we
went to the used book store. It’s a tiny
store with cramped shelves filled from
top to bottom. Strips of tape labeled
what sections held which books. There
were sections labeled anthologies and
courtesy of www.thegeminigeeks.com
oversized books, and even manga. Now,
I have to admit, even though this store
has been around since I was little, I have
hardly ever gone into it. I can’t get over
the weird smell used books have. That’s
why I don’t rent library books very of-
ten. You rent it and then flip through
the book and get a huge blast of an old,
musty smell. How am I supposed to enjoy
putting my nose in a book to read if
I have to keep a good distance from the
stench?
So that is why I could count the number
of times I’ve been in there: the smell,
and of course, the limited selection that
is incomparable to big stores like Barnes
& Noble and Borders. But now that I am
in college, I started realizing how many
of these books I could actually use in
my studies. I originally went in there for
a quick peek to see if they had a book
mentioned as secondary reading in my
literature class. Unfortunately, I was out
of luck that day. They did not have the
one book I wanted.
I started in the oversized book sections.
It’s something about those books
that make me feel like a kid again: huge
pages, glossy text, not to mention the
pretty pictures. Immediately I found
three books I could have used this semester.
Specifically, two for background
reading, and one that would have been
really helpful for a presentation I gave in
February. And it didn’t stop there. I con-
The Retriever Weekly welcomes your comments. Letters to the editor must be submitted before 5 p.m. Friday via e-mail to eic@retrieverweekly.com
or delivered to The Retriever Weekly office, UC 214. Please limit letters to 300 words and include your full name, year and major. The Retriever Weeky
retains the right to edit submissions for content and length.
Correction: In last week’s issue of The Retriever Weekly in “Corey’s Corner” a line stated that at the 2008 America East Championships
the RAC was at maximun capacity at under 3,000 people. It should have read under 4,000 people.
> see Books [9]
The Retriever Weekly staff editorials reflect the views of the editorial board; signed columns and advertisements represent the opinions of the individual writers
and advertisers, respectively, and do not necessarily reflect those of The Retriever Weekly or the University of Maryland Baltimore County. The Retriever Weekly
publishes weekly on Tuesdays during the regular school year. Editors can be reached at (410) 455-1260 during normal business hours or at University Center 214;
1000 Hilltop Circle; UMBC; Baltimore, MD 21250. The Retriever Weekly is an equal opportunity employer.

The ReTRieveR Weekly
APRIL 26, 2011 opinion 7
End the foreign language requirement at UMBC
Chris McKinney
editorial staff
With the debate on education expanding
day in and day out, all aspects
of a student’s academic life are being
examined: teacher tenure and pay,
curriculum and emphasis on specific
subtopics, and which subjects should
have a higher importance in a students
schedule.
Now, when I went through school,
the foreign language requirement for
graduation was fairly manageable: take
and pass up to the second level in any
one language. Having taken French in
middle school, I continued for my first
year of high school and then dropped
it (primarily because my teacher was
subpar, to put it politely). But I constantly
found myself asking: what was
the point of taking French?
Even here at UMBC, there is a language
requirement. Even those of us
who are in the STEM majors, where
foreign language skills might be low
on the priority list, are forced to take
a language up to the 201-level. But it
is just like the Physical Education requirement:
what’s the point?
To be blunt, there are plenty of
other issues to address in our deficient
school systems. The U.S. lacks
any sort of competitive nature with
our business partners, particularly
in math, so it sounds absurd to suggest
an emphasis in a field in which
students more than likely will not use
those skills. In a study published by
the Harvard University’s Program on
Education Policy and Governance,
six percent of U.S. public and private
school students performed at an advanced
level in math. In comparison,
Taiwan, Hong Kong, Japan, Australia,
Switzerland, and Canada, among many
other countries, have at least twice the
students performing at the same level.
And science? Well, those statistics are
even worse.
Take it from a math major, math is
used day in and day out, by everyone.
Whether you’re driving, telling time,
or balancing your checkbook, some
form of math is in play. Do you use
your less-than-stellar Spanish-speaking
skills to buy groceries? Didn’t think
so. It just does not make any sense to
require students to waste their time in
foreign language classes. Should students
have the opportunity to try out
a foreign language like French or German?
Absolutely. But mandating the
study of a foreign language is taking
it too far.
Now sure, there are pros to studying
a foreign language: the versatility and
knowledge you gain when entering a
new culture will certainly be of benefit
should the need or want to travel arise.
But unless you continuously utilize
your language skills, your proficiency
will slowly but surely wane into inadequacy.
And, as though there aren’t enough
reasons against compelling students
to study a foreign language, it comes
down to knowing our native tongue.
Even after twelve years of studying
English in the public school system,
many students do not know the proper
usage of a semicolon, cannot identify a
fragment, and overall are poor writers
and speakers of English. Now, if speak-
ing English, the language that most
Americans speak, is too hard to grasp
for students, how in the hell can we
even begin to think of forcing students
into studying a foreign language?
Comments can be sent to
cmck1@umbc.edu.
Language classes don’t deserve the bad reputation
courtesy of www.utexas.edu
Foreign language courses expose students to new traditions, such as Mexico’s Dia de los Muertos.
Ryanne Milani
editorial staff
Of all the graduation requirements
here at UMBC, the foreign language
requirement probably has the worst
reputation. Students don’t want to
waste valuable credits on language
courses that supposedly have nothing
to do with their majors or their futures.
No matter how frustrating language
courses can be, this bad reputation
is undeserved. When I was in eighth
grade, my school rewarded students
that did well in their English classes by
allowing them to start studying a new
language. Instead of looking at foreign
language classes as something to suffer
through, I hope students start looking
at these classes as something fun and
courtesy of www.superiorlearningassociates.com
Instead of sitting through language courses, students could be learning the things they actually want to learn.
rewarding, just like I did back in middle
school. If taught properly, learning a
language shouldn’t be stressful. Foreign
language classes involve a lot more than
memorizing vocabulary words and new
sentence structures. Since languages are
so often influenced by the culture of the
people who speak the language, a really
good foreign language class can expose
students to a completely new culture
or lifestyle. Some of the best language
classes I’ve ever taken dedicated entire
class periods to trying cultural dishes
or learning how to make cultural art. I
don’t think anyone reading this could
ever say that they had these opportunities
in a math class. Besides, like it or not,
the ability to communicate in more than
one language increases one’s likelihood
of getting hired. In a situation where two
otherwise equal candidates are applying
for a job, the candidate with foreign
language skills will generally be the candidate
that gets hired. Why? The ability
to communicate with a large number
of people from diverse backgrounds is
important no matter what the job is.
Imagine you are planning on working
in a hospital, and you are proficient in
Korean. If a Korean patient comes to the
hospital, he or she will probably want
to communicate with a doctor in their
native language. Your language skills
will make you much more valuable in
this situation than a doctor that can
only speak English. Most employers
take this into consideration when hiring
new employees. Some jobs might even
require employees to learn a second language.
In these jobs, such as jobs at the
National Security Agency, someone with
language skills will cost less money to
hire, since the agency won’t have to pay
for their new employee to receive language
training. In this situation, learning
a target language in high school and
college helps students become much
more valuable in the workforce. Even
students that struggle with writing in
English could benefit from foreign language
courses. Generally, in lower level
language courses, students learn a lot
about grammar. Even after three years
of double majoring in English and Applied
Linguistics, I can almost guarantee
that I learned more about grammar in
my high school Spanish classes than I
have learned throughout my entire college
career. This doesn’t mean that my
college courses don’t adequately cover
grammar; it just goes to show how much
more one can learn about grammar
when learning a new language. When
people learn their first language, they
aren’t taught the difference between the
preterite and the past imperfective tenses.
However, these notions are covered
extensively in most language courses. If
these terms don’t mean anything to you,
then you clearly haven’t studied them in
relation to a second language. Learning
a second language opens many doors
and should be viewed as an opportunity,
not a requirement imposed by the
university. Students have so much to
gain from studying a foreign language.
Don’t look at foreign language classes as
something unfortunate standing in your
way of graduation, but as a treat, just
like it was for me way back in middle
school.
Comments can be sent to
milani1@umbc.edu.

8 opinion APRIL 26, 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
A new reason to go vegan: protecting workers’ rights
The Baltimore VegFest will teach students new ways to explore veganism.
Yasmin Radbod
senior staff writer
Typically, we vegans focus on a
three-pronged approach to veganism:
animals, environment, and
health. I’ve written articles before
focusing on how veganism supports
all three; our health is improved, the
environment is healthier, and obviously
it’s cruelty-free. I recently read
an article out of VegNews regarding
the animal-product industry (not
just meat, but all byproducts), and
I was appalled by the injustices humans
are put through because of the
animal-product industry.
This might seem like a no-brainer:
who would want to slit cows’ throats,
cut off their testicles, or keep chickens
pinned into battery cages? Re-
member, the animal-product industry
includes dairy products, meat,
clothing products, and more. Even
in the process of making leather,
people are exposed to all sorts of awful
chemicals, and leather-making is
most prevalent in India, where using
those chemicals is permissible.
But I digress. Who do you think,
demographically speaking, is packing
your meat? Well, impoverished,
undocumented migrants are. For example,
Tyson Fresh Meats, one of the
biggest meat-producing companies,
has actively recruited workers from
Mexico and Central America, while
also encouraging these new employees
to invite friends and family to
apply for work.
And why recruit these people to
pack meat? Because they are un-
Your iPhone is watching and patiently biding its time
courtesy of www.opposingviews.com
Are you paranoid yet? With the iPhone’s latest invasion of privacy, you
should be.
documented. And as undocumented
workers, they are afraid to seek out
their protections as international
migrants. They do not know they
have rights as workers, like workers’
compensation. It is also intimidating
to seek redress to injuries, other
health issues, and fair wages when
all the paperwork is in English. A
worker from Chiapas employed by
Smithfield Foods stated, “I am sick
at work with a cold and breathing
problems, and my arms are always
sore. I have red rashes on my arms
and hands, and the skin between my
fingers is dry and cracked. I think I
have an allergic reaction to the hogs.
But I am afraid to say anything about
this because I’m afraid they will fire
me.” This statement is from a report
that Human Rights Watch released
Josh Palmer
senior staff writer
The room is dark. Jumpy music
plays in the background as the
extremely attractive blond detective
walks into the room. “I know
it’s here,” she says, “There must be
proof of his guilt!”
“But he has the perfect alibi,” says
her equally attractive, but less intelligent,
male counterpart.
“Not according to my gut,” she responds
as she begins to look around
the room. “There must be something
here.” Nothing seems to fit in this
wildly contrived murder mystery.
They search around the room for
a couple more minutes. Finally, the
male says, “I give up; there’s nothing
here.” “Wait!” she says, “I found
his iPhone!” pulling the slim device
from underneath several papers.
Within thirty seconds, they are able
to track everywhere the phone has
been, find the culprit, and end the
episode in a way to frustrate viewers
with the will-they-won’t-they sexual
tension.
Worst TV show ever? Possibly.
Terrible writing and dialogue? Well,
I’d like to give myself a little credit.
Could this be a possible real-life
story? Absolutely.
Earlier last week, the tech world
was shocked when a programmer
revealed that he had discovered
in 2005 regarding the meatpacking
industry.
And let’s not forget that these injustices
go on in agricultural work
as well. I would highly suggest that
you at least buy organic produce,
because the workers in the fields
won’t get exposed to extremely toxic
chemicals. Federal officials estimate
that more than sixty percent of US
farm workers are undocumented
immigrants. The average worker is
male, thirty-three years old, born in
Mexico, and speaks Spanish primarily.
And how much does he earn a
year for his back-breaking work?
$11,000. That’s a disgrace on the
United States.
Shame on all of us for supporting
this, and letting it continue. As consumers,
we hold the key to change. I
that the iPhone, a device beloved by
millions, tracks and stores the GPS
location of everywhere it has been
and stores it within memory. The
data can be accessed if one knows
what he/she is doing, and all of one’s
secrets can be laid out for all to see.
As of this writing, Apple and a certain
employee of Apple I know have
refused to comment on the issue.
What does this mean? Well, if
Mom ever wanted to know who’s
been sneaking cookies from the
cookie jar, she doesn’t have to look
far for the solution. Or, if your girlfriend
wants to know if you’ve been
sneaking other cookies from other
cookie jars, she just has to plug
your phone into the computer, run
the special software, and then you’ll
be looking for a new cookie jar, if
you catch my drift. A stalker wants
to track your whereabouts. The
software and device are used in law
enforcement and court cases. The
possibilities are endless.
Now, when I first heard about
this, the news hit me almost as hard
as the end of the last Harry Potter
movie (RIP Dobby). Although I was
previously a huge fan of Apple and
its products, my adoration of the
mighty company has lessened. It’s
hard to imagine any reasons for the
implementation of the tracker other
than the obvious. It’s Orwellian at
best, as well as downright creepy.
courtesy of www.thehumaneleague.com
already implored you to buy organics.
There are a host of other issues I
didn’t have room to cover in this article.
You need to use your power as
a consumer to end these injustices.
And who ever thought you’d go
vegan for your own species? Now
you know. And what better way to
explore veganism? Come to the First
Annual Baltimore VegFest (www.
vegfestbaltimore.com) on Saturday,
April 30 from 11 am. to 3 pm. on
Erickson Field. Yep, it’s right here at
UMBC. Over fifty vegan vendors will
be there, the Vice President of PETA
will be speaking, and there will be
lots of free vegan food, a raw food
cooking demo, and much more.
Comments can be sent to
radbod1@umbc.edu.
The entire history of where an iPhone
has been is contained within a
couple megabytes. If you take your
phone everywhere, like I do, that
means that your entire life for the
past year or so has been tracked and
stored electronically. Kiss that sense
of privacy goodbye.
This is something that cannot
happen within industry or society
as a whole. Anyone who has read
George Orwell’s classic 1984 has
some taste of what a totalitarian
society entails, and it is not pretty.
The iPhone tracker eliminates an individual’s
privacy to a level unheard
of today.
Hopefully, Apple will eventually
comment on the issue and give a
reason for the program. Even better
will be assurances and proof that
this will not happen without users’
consent. However, until then, I will
have a distrust of new devices that
have half-eaten fruit on them, which
is something many buyers will also
have.
Comments can be sent
to jpa1@umbc.edu.

The ReTRieveR Weekly
Why is there no water in our machines?
courtesy of harish trivedi
Whatever happened to pure, delicious, sugar-free water?
Don’t fall
asleep on
the beach.
Just don’t
do it.
Corey Johns
editorial staff
Do you remember the good old
days when water tasted like water? I
miss those days. Now, anytime I ask
somebody for water they follow up
with stupid questions, like do you
want lemon in it? Or which flavor?
How about water-flavored water,
does that still exist?
I think maybe my most devastating
moment of this semester came
on a Tuesday night, probably about
three weeks into classes. I was in the
middle of my 15-minute break in my
MLL 305 class, and walked over to
the Administration building, hoping
to get a nice bottle of Aquafina out
of the Aquafina vending machine. To
my surprise, there was not even one
single option for regular water in a
water machine. Who knew? I could
get either some sort of tea, flavored
water, or workout drink, but I could
not get plain, good ‘ol fashioned
water. Right next to the huge vending
machine labeled Aquafina was a
Pepsi Machine, and it had one single
option that was for water. So this
isn't a complete lost cause, I thought
to myself. I can still get some refreshing
water. I put in my $1.50,
pushed the button, and waited for it
to drop my bottle of water so I could
get my drink on. But to my dismay
it wasn't water that dropped out, it
was a blue-labeled Pepsi.
"Seriously!" I yelled out. "Is getting
a simple water, the liquid that is
the essence of life, just too much to
ask for now-a-days?"
I absolutely love water-flavored
water. Anybody who says they don't
like it because it doesn't have a taste
just doesn't know what they're talking
about. I can taste the difference
between water and Pepsi or Sierra
Mist, no problem. Heck, I can taste
the difference between bottled water
and tap water. My brother consistently
says I can't, but every single
time he has tested me I've guessed
which was which. But finding regular
water just is not easy anymore.
What is this flavored water stuff?
If I want water, why would I want
something with sugar in it to give it
a flavor? Or why would I want something
that isn't flavored like water?
Personally, I rather enjoy the fact
that water is one of the few things
that I can consume that won't have
a single effect on me. It has no calories,
no saturated fat, nothing in it
except good and refreshing liquid
that keeps me hydrated when I'm
playing soccer or quenches my
thirst while I'm eating lunch. I can't
say that for any sort of soda, diet or
not.
Soda dehydrates you; it does not
quench your thirst at all. It also
makes people feel bloated and full
even when they are not. It is not a
healthy alternative to water. Asking
for water in a vending machine
with a giant bottle of Aquafina on it
should not too much to ask because
tap water, even though it may be the
healthier and cheaper option, just
plain tastes bad.
Comments can be sent to
cjohns2@umbc.edu.
APRIL 26, 2011 opinion 9
Commons’ Sense By: Anonymous
Buy your
books
used > from Books [6]
tinued to gloss over the titles, my head
leaning on my shoulder, trying to read
the spines. I just kept finding more and
more books that I could have been using
all semester. I made my way through
the science fiction section, which could
not have helped me in my studies, sadly,
Ithenmade my way to the anthology section
and the classics. One of the perks I
have as an English major is that many of
our textbooks are here on the shelves!
I suddenly saw how many of my textbooks
I could have bought there, instead
of at the bookstore or online. I picked a
couple up, opened the flap, and looked
at the price in the upper right hand corner,
written lightly in pencil. I nearly
fainted in the store. I would gladly put
up with the awful stench of used books
if it meant I could get them for that price.
Anything to keep the extra change in my
pocket. That’s why I plan on, and why I
am suggesting to everyone, to try looking
at your neighborhood used book store
for books. Whether they are for school,
although you’re obviously not going to
find math books there, or if they are for
pleasure reading, and you don’t mind
the smell, these books are sitting on the
shelves, waiting for a home. If that doesn’t
make you feel guilty enough, think of all
the money you could save.
Comments can be sent to
jmeier1@umbc.edu.
Do you have an opinion about something going on in
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Email your thoughts to opinion@retrieverweekly.com
and they may just appear in Commons’ Sense!
It will make you friends! It looks great on a resume! Its
what all the cool kids are doing!

10 APRIL 26, 2011
Ashley Morrow
Contributing writer
As I took a seat in the back row
of the library gallery on Wednesday,
having already braved the numerous
macabre photographs eerily lining
the gallery walls from the lingering
Paranormal Photographs exhibit,
I took in the crowd around me.
The gallery rang with lively chatter
and everyone seemed to know
each other. The screen at the front
of the gallery projected the lecture
title: “Citizens of the World, and an
Archive Mouse,” given by UMBC
Renaissance History professor Dr.
James S. Grubb. I was among a coterie
of academic society I had always
admired at UMBC: the historians, a
well-dressed, largely bespectacled,
and slightly eccentric faction of the
UMBC Arts and Humanities community.
I listened eagerly to the
conversations around me, feeling
very undergrad and conspicuous in
my t-shirt and flip-flops. Dr. Grubb
conversed with a silver-haired woman
near the front about Aruba. Several
students to my right discussed
extra credit for one of their history
classes. A group of women in front
of me casually bandied about paper
topics and new areas of study.
During this school year the academic
year of 2010-2011, the College
of Arts, Humanities, and Social
Sciences honored Dr. Grubb by
naming him the Lipitz professor, a
relatively new professorship supported
by an endowment created
by Roger C. Lipitz and the Lipitz
Family Foundation, "to recognize
and support innovative and distinguished
teaching and research
in the Arts, Humanities and Social
Sciences at UMBC," according to the
College of Arts, Humanities, and Social
Sciences website. Dr. Grubb has
generated a rather impressive body
of work since he joined the UMBC
Department of History in 1983. A
well-known scholar of the Italian
Renaissance, he is the author and a
editor of seven books and the author
of over twenty articles.
From the beginning, Dr. Grubb
admitted his lecture might be rather
scattered. As only the fourth Lipitz
professor, he had no clear precedent
to tell him how to proceed, and there
were numerous topics he wished to
address.
After a brief discussion of his philosophy
of teaching creating citizens
of the world and of his work in the
archives of Venice exploring the social
relationships of Italians during
the Renaissance, Dr. Grubb moved
on to discuss a point which would
become the central focus of his
lecture: the future of the Arts and
Humanities in the universities of the
world.
We are all aware that the ways of
the world are changing. Whispered
The ReTRieveR Weekly
ARTS
Grubb explores mediocrity of the arts in our society
Dr. James Grubb’s “Citizens of the World, and an Archive Mouse” lecture at the Humanities Forum on April 20 analyzed the decline of the Humanities in academics.
about in academic circles and even
in the broader culture are the issues
of what digitalization is doing
to the printed book, the newspaper,
the libraries, the psyches of the next
generation. Less discussed are the
effects that these moves forward
in technology, and subsequently
in ways of thinking, are having on
the university system, on the ways
in which we learn, and on what we
learn.
In this age, when getting a degree
in English, or, worse, history, is seen
as a life sentence to poverty and destitution,
it should be no wonder that
the Arts and Humanities departments
at universities are suffering
budget cuts so severe they threaten
the survival of the curriculum. So
far, the College of Arts, Humanities,
and Social Sciences at UMBC has
been mostly sheltered from these
cuts. While Dr. Grubb admitted
that some departments have had to
become more entrepreneurial with
funding for teaching assistants and
other programs, he also pointed out
that the college would soon benefit
from the Performing Arts and Humanities
Building currently under
construction, while departments
elsewhere have not been so lucky.
Dr. Grubb indicated a societywide
attitude shift as the culprit
behind the decline of the Arts and
Humanities in education. To citizens
of this modern age, Dr. Grubb re-
minded us, Wikipedia and HBO, despite
their obvious failings, are often
seen as "good enough" sources of
historical knowledge. History is no
longer revered as it once was; there
is no drive to return to an earlier,
seemingly better age. For the first
time in centuries, we are satisfied
that the world in which we live is
good enough, that we do not need
to look back toward the wisdom of
the classical ages for guidance and
instruction. In the eyes of the public,
perhaps history itself is becoming
obsolete.
At this point in the lecture, it was
apparent that Dr. Grubb had hit on
some of the biggest anxieties and
fears of his audience, largely made
up of professors and graduate students
in the College of Arts, Humanities,
and Social Sciences. The
silence deepened, and tension filled
the room.
Dr. Grubb pressed on. The arts
and humanities had only come to
be part of the university curriculum
in recent years. Historically, the university
mainly taught law, medicine,
and theology. For most of their considerable
history, the arts and humanities
had operated outside of the
university system, and Dr. Grubb
called our attention to the emergence
of the arts, in particular, outside the
universities again. Numerous amateur
theatre groups have sprung up
in the Baltimore area recently. All
Julian Brezon — TrW
signs point to a flourishing of the
arts in the amateur sector.
Dr. Grubb pointed out the difficult
facts that academia and the
academics, with their codified prose
indecipherable to those without a
graduate degree, deserted the public
before the public deserted academia.
Additionally, Dr. Grubb emphasized
that those who studied the arts and
humanities would have to become
more entrepreneurial in the coming
years, looking for work and collaborations
outside of the university system.
They would have to make their
work more accessible to the general
public.
Nevertheless, his message also
served as a beacon of hope: the arts
and humanities, he assured his audience,
would not die in the face of
this digital age. They would grow
and change and adapt, as they always
had. If there were no change,
he pointed out, the field wouldn't be
very interesting, would it?
Comments may be sent to
morrowa1@umbc.edu

The ReTRieveR Weekly
APRIL 26, 2011 arts 11
Tina Fey puts a funny spin on motherhood in new book
Michelle Sumpter
Contributing writer
In Tina Fey's new book Bossypants,
we get a bundled-up batch of
comedy that is sure to please fans of
Fey's work. However, for those who
do not like Fey, I would say leave
this one at the bookstore.
I've been an on-again, off-again
fan of Tina Fey's show 30 Rock, but
I've always liked her work on SNL
(especially her Sarah Palin sketch).
While reading this book, I found
myself actually laughing out loud at
many parts. I also have a new appreciation
for her show because of
it. But what was it really about? Not
much, really. When you look at the
cover, you think you'll get the story
of Tina Fey's life, a memoir of sorts,
largely dealing with her work in
television. And I guess that is sort
of what this is, but really it is a compilation
of anecdotes that Fey could
make humorous. She did talk about
her childhood for a bit and almost
tells the reader how she got her scar.
She was slashed in the face, but we
never know the circumstances (I
was very disappointed about this
lack of information). We learn about
Carell is leaving The Office...is Ferrell up to the task?
Morey Rosner
staff writer
Seven years ago, The Office made its
debut on NBC as a satire series on paper
merchant office jobs. This sitcom
was born out of the British show, also
known as The Office, which starred
Ricky Gervais. Gervais portrayed
David Brent, a self-absorbed middle
manager who earned the series fame
for his contradictory and self-aggrandizing
personality.
Enter Steve Carell. In 2005, NBC
released a new version of The Office.
Located in the United States, the series
followed the British version, especially
through the creation of a character
designed off of David Brent. Like Da-
her father and who he was as a person,
and we also learn about her
husband, but when she first introduces
him, she's iffy about using his
name.
The majority of this book is about
Fey's newfound job: motherhood.
She had her child in 2005, and talks
about how difficult it was to be pregnant,
have a new-born, then have a
toddler, while working in the ever
demanding field of show business.
She contemplates giving up her job
and being a full time mom when her
nanny doesn't live up to mothering
standards. But she sees her show 30
Rock as her other baby.
She was called on to create a show
by Lorne Michaels (producer of SNL
and 30 Rock), and 30 Rock was the
result. Even after having been on
the air for five seasons, Fey still says
her show gets low ratings, but she
loves the work. There are also many
people depending on her for their
livelihoods, so for their sake, she
couldn't give it up.
My favorite part of the book is
the story of her honeymoon cruise.
There is a fire in one of the engine
rooms and they are nearly evacuated
to the lifeboats, women and children
vid, the new office manager, Michael
Scott, became as inept and flawed as
his counterpart from the older sitcom.
Carell carried this role, appearing as
an incompetent, immature, and often
tactless leader of the Scranton branch
of his company.
Carell epitomized humor on the
show, specifically through the ridiculousness
of Michael. Throughout the
past seven seasons, Michael begins
to strengthen his relationship with
his workers, even with his ludicrous
ideology and personality. His branch
of the company rises to success, even
with his questionable management
,such as, "You may look around and
see two groups here; white collar, blue
collar. But I don't see it that way, and
first (they still do that). When she
and her husband are walking towards
the lifeboats, she is thinking
about how sad it will be to leave her
husband on a doomed ship. After the
crisis is over and everyone is okay,
she finds out that he was thinking
how sad it would be for her to stay
on the ship with him. This kind of
story is found all throughout Fey's
new book, with her witty humor
helping to make it comical.
I wouldn't necessarily recommend
this book to anyone, but for
those of us who do enjoy Tina Fey's
sense of humor, this one shouldn't
be missed. It will have you chuckling
to yourself or even laughing,
so I would recommend not reading
it when you're out in public, or in
the hallway waiting for your class
to start--the looks you'll get can be
embarrassing.
Comments may be sent to
miche2@umbc.edu
After seven seasons, The Office writers search for a replacement for seasoned boss Michael Scott.
you know why not? Because I'm collarblind"
("Boys and Girls").
For whatever flaws Michael displays
throughout the show, his workers still
stand by him. However frustrated or
exasperated they become, they always
remain with him in the end, regardless
of each episode's cataclysmic events,
usually caused by Michael himself.
Carell deserves much credit for Michael's
erratic, ignorant, and laughable
actions. He excellently evokes vanity,
particularly through his expressions
and emphases when speaking. His
honest and straight face when saying
something like "I don't want somebody
sucking up to me because they
think I am going to help their career. I
want them sucking up to me because
CourTeSY reagan arThur BookS
Tina Fey gives a comical and witty explanation of how to be a Bossypants
while raisings a family.
CourTeSY nBC
they genuinely love me," attests to his
skill and brilliance as an actor.
However, The Office is about to encounter
a true test this coming season.
Last June, NBC announced that Steve
Carell's contract would be expiring
mid-season. Such a moment determines
the future success or failure of a
sitcom. Only several years ago, the hitseries
Scrubs was faced with a similar
dilemma. When Dr. Kelso, the Chief of
Medicine at Sacred Heart Hospital was
forced to retire, Scrubs writers chose to
hire Dr. Maddox, a newcomer, to fill in
the boss' position. However, Maddox's
failing popularity led to her removal.
Instead, Scrubs veteran John McGinley,
who portrayed Dr. Perry Cox for eight
seasons, was elevated to the new posi-
tion--an old friendly face that viewers
could relate to.
What The Office writers are doing
for the seventh season is an improved
strategy where others have failed. While
debating who to cast as Michael's true
successor for future seasons, the writers
have decided on a transition period.
Instead of using someone that no
one has ever heard of, they have hired
celebrated actor Will Ferrell to act as
Michael's temporary replacement. Following
the plot, Michael is leaving at
the end of the season for Colorado
with his girlfriend, requiring a successor
as branch manager. With this,
Deangelo Jeremitrius Vickers enters
the show, played by Ferrell. The writers'
plan is to model Deangelo off of
Michael, and have to Ferrell portray a
man even more inept and disconcerting
than Carell's character. Their hope
is that by using an acclaimed and beloved
actor like Ferrell, Office fans will
stand by the show until a new boss is
found.
True, casting Ferrell as a temporary
replacement is an excellent choice. He
has worked with Carell before in the
celebrated comedy Anchorman, which
earned them both considerable popularity.
However, there is a flaw to the
writers' move. Ferrell has only been
cast for four episodes. He may be able
to hold the show until the end of the
season, but then a new boss must be
found. With such a plan, having so
many intermediary bosses may lose
the viewers' interest. although, with
the current situation, Ferrell is definitely
the best choice for this period
of transition.
Comments may be sent
to morey1@umbc.edu

12 aDVertisement APRIL 26, 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
!
!

BY DANIEL SUPANICK
FAST Five [PG-13]
Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, and everyone who’s ever been in a Fast
and the Furious movie and hasn’t died has come back for one last
job in this fifth film in the series. Also stars the Rock as a police
officer. Let’s put this movie into perspective: In the trailer, Paul
Walker and Vin Diesel run a car off a cliff, only to begin falling into
a body of water below. Their first instinct is to jump out of the car,
despite the fact that there’s nowhere to go, and they make little to
no facial expressions while jumping several hundred feet into the
air. Essentially, what I’m trying to say is that it’ll be like the other
films: majestically stupid, and not as badass as it thinks it is.
Hoodwinked Too! Hood vS. evil [PG]
Hayden Panetierre voices Little Red Riding Hood in this sequel to
that other Hoodwinked movie, which was supposed to be really
bad. I’ve only heard it was bad, because I didn’t watch it, because
I choose not to watch movies I know will be bad. Like this one. No,
thank you. And by the way, the animation looks atrocious.
PRom [PG]
Set in a universe where high school is a PG-rated culture, a bunch
of kids get ready for and go to prom, where they will meet the
loves of their lives and end up happy and together forever. I hate
you, Disney.
The ReTRieveR Weekly
APRIL 26, 2011 arts 13
Water for Elephants loses itself in its static characters
Jacob (Pattinson) finds a new life of love and purpose in the circus after leaving home.
Daniel Supanick
senior staff writer
If it weren't such a gorgeouslooking
movie, Water for Elephants
probably wouldn't be worth the
price of admission. As achingly slow
as it is beautiful, Water for Elephants
is a melodramatic bore. It takes what
could be an interesting subject and
melds it with a listless love triangle
that is both uninteresting and laughable.
Water for Elephants follows the
story of Jacob Jankowski (Robert
Pattinson), a veterinary student who
finds himself without direction after
his parents die and he misses his
final exams. He falls upon a circus
train, where he quickly rises through
the ranks as a veterinary authority,
and eventually becomes an elephant
trainer. He becomes quick friends
with the circus's temperamental
ringleader (Christophe Waltz), but
finds himself in trouble when he and
the ringleader's wife (Reese Witherspoon)
begin to fall in love.
Not to say that melodrama can't
be done right, but it certainly isn't
The Pakistani Student Association’s Bhangra Night in the UC Ballroom on April 23 generated much attention from
the UMBC community.
here. There's no interesting angle
to the love triangle, as none of the
characters are fleshed-out enough
to be interesting. It's also a highly
improbable relationship. Jacob is
supposed to be around 21 years
old, and the ringleader's wife is well
into her 30's. Looking at this from a
coming-of-age angle, there's no way
that'd work, and there's no way either
of them would learn anything.
The approach to their relationship is
unbelievable, and is so full of overdramatization
that it's hard to take
so it seriously.
CourTeSY 3 arTS
The acting doesn't do the film
many favors, either. While Robert
Pattinson is better in this film than
he has been in the past, and he does
his best with a character who just
isn't that well-written, he still can't
save the film from itself. Christophe
Waltz does a fine job, but probably
has the best-written character in the
film. Reese Witherspoon, however,
seems to be phoning it in. She seems
bored in her role, almost as though
she showed up because it had been
stipulated in her contract that she
do so. She offers nothing to re-
Julian Brezon — TrW
ally take from her character besides
what's already on the page, which
isn't much.
The film is ultimately hurt the
most by its pacing and storytelling.
While it was probably never meant
to be anything besides a story that
took itself in strides, it takes strides
that are too long, and feels longer
than its two-hour runtime. With a
lack of any interesting storytelling
taking place, it's really hard to get
invested when the story is being told
at a haltingly slow rate. The story
itself doesn't offer anything compelling
to latch on to. The romantic
triangle aside, the rest of the story
is pretty formulaic and ridiculous,
highlighting improbable occurrences
and passing them off as acceptable.
It's hard to take seriously.
While the film is aesthetically gorgeous,
and has a great musical score
to boot, Water for Elephants just
can't find anything interesting to say
or do. It's quite boring, and never
really finds a way to make its subject
as interesting as it is in real life.
Slow, repetitive, and dull, Water for
Elephants could be best compared
to a finely-crafted vase: Beautifully
crafted on the outside, hollow on
the inside.
Comments may be sent
to daniels7@umbc.edu

14 arts APRIL 26 , 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
UMBC senior creates magical world out of our qualms
CoreY JohnS — TrW
UMBC student Alina Grisorovitch’s Magic Artinia addresses real-world
problems plaguing every college student through a story of magic and
fantasy.
Corey Johns
editorial staff
It's a problem a lot of college students
have--not knowing what they
are going to do after they graduate-and
it is one that UMBC senior Alina
Grigorovitch has highlighted in her
first book, Magic Artinia.
Don't let the name fool you. Magic
Artinia is more than just a science
fiction novel. It is a story of a recent
college graduate trying to find out
what he is going to do with his life
after he walks across the podium and
Tania Chatterjee
Contributing writer
Every year in India and Bangladesh,
Pohela Boishakh, or the Bengali New
Year, is celebrated with great pomp and
grandeur. The celebrations include singing
and dancing, new clothes, good food,
and a whole lot of color.
Since 2006, local Bengali students
have been celebrating the Bengali New
Year with great success, trying to re-
gets his diploma, that has a little bit
of science fiction wrapped up in it.
The story revolves around John
Hallen, a recent college graduate
searching to do something meaningful
after he becomes disillusioned
with his life, and becomes bored
of his day job. Hallen is a native of
Vandom, Artinia, a fictional city on a
fictional country in a fictional planet
in a universe where everybody possesses
a super power. Super powers
range from everything from immortality
to having a thought bubble appear
above a person's head, reveal-
create the celebrations that go on in their
native countries. The celebration, called
Boishakhi Bang, is a collaboration between
Johns Hopkins' Bengali Organization,
the University of Maryland College
Park's Bangladeshi Students Association,
and UMBC's own Bengali Students
Council. This year, the show was held
in the beautiful Glass Pavilion at Johns
Hopkins.
The pavilion was completely decked
out for the show: the railings were cov-
ing all of their secrets when they get
really emotional about things.
When describing the book, Grigorovitch
never even mentions that
the story is about people with super
powers, because it is not. It is about
"what happens when you graduate
college and you don't really know
what to do with yourself," she said.
Super powers just happen to be part
of it.
One day four years ago, just after
she graduated from Pikesville High
School, Grigorovitch was walking
home and the idea struck her. "It basically
hit me like a train, and for the
next two days, idea after idea bombarded
my mind as the overview, the
characters, and the attitude of the
book took form," she said.
Now, four years later, her 450page
book is on sale on both amazon.com
and barnesandnoble.com as
an e-book download for $4.99, and
she is in the process of getting it
printed, which she expects to happen
over the summer.
Since she was 10-years-old, Grigorovitch
has dabbled in writing stories,
but no story kept her interested
like Magic Artinia, making it the first
story she has actually completed.
"I was working on another story at
the time, but I dropped it in pursuit
of this," she said. "I had never been
ered in twinkling white lights, and miniature
trees around the room were covered
in Chinese lanterns and Christmas
lights. On the side, a table was arranged
with tall glass jars containing floating tea
lights. This year's Boishakhi celebration
was even more special because this year
marks the 150th anniversary of the birth
of Nobel Laureate Rabindranath Tagore,
a poet of Indian origin. Posters featuring
Tagore's beautiful poems, writings, and
epigrams were seen on the walls of the
so passionate about any other projects.
Writing it didn't even feel like a
choice. I couldn't not write it."
Finding time in her college schedule
was hard to do, but Grigorovitch,
a Bio-Chem major with a
desire to go to graduate school for
Neuro-science, worked on the book
in pretty much any free time she
had—mostly during the winter and
summer breaks from school—and
when she finished, she started looking
for publishers.
Finding a publisher that would
get the book printed in a decent
enough time to make her references
to Facebook relevant proved to be
more difficult than she thought.
"I had absolutely no idea how the
publishing industry worked, [but]
I found out I had to find an agent
and they had to represent me, and
maybe in three or five years it will
get published. But there was so
much time-sensitive material that I
couldn't wait three to five years for
people to see it," she said.
So she went the route of self-publishing,
which she discovered while
looking for ways to get publishing
companies to print her book, and
already her book is for sale.
"The really good thing about
Amazon and Barnes & Noble is
that they'll let pretty much anyone
pavilion as a tribute to his contribution
to Indian literature.
The show itself, as usual, started off
with a bang, with a video introducing
what Boishakhi Bang and Pohela
Boishakh is all about. It was followed
by sixteen colorful performances, which
included traditional Bengali songs and
folk dancing, Indian Classical dance, videos,
and singing. The show closed with
a hilarious and colorful fashion show
from each of the three schools. UMBC's
put up their book online for free as
an electronic copy," she said. "This
summer I'm going to print copies of
it. There are plenty of self-publishing
companies where you're paying for
them to print your book but without
having a publisher to get your name
out there."
All that does is make it more work
to promote herself, but on the bright
side, "you retain all the rights to
everything you write and you get a
much bigger cut of the profits," she
said.
On Saturday, September 23rd,
Alina Grigorovitch will be appearing
at the Baltimore Book Festival
to promote her novel. She has also
released a website, www.newtothepublic.com,
named after her self-publishing
company, to promote Magic
Artinia as well as other future works,
like her new project, which is a parody
of the Sisterhood of the Traveling
Pants, where instead of four teenage
girls it's "four cranky men who are
fed up with their lives" and become
friends and find things to do with
themselves.
Comments may be sent
to cjohns2@umbc.edu
UMBC’s Bengali Student Council celebrates New Year
Dressed in traditional Bengali attire, Nafecza Ahmed, Sharmila Das, Julia Luke, Tania Chatterjee, Fahmida Sultana, and Preethy Prasad enjoy the Bengali festival.
Tania ChaTTerJee — TrW
fashion show was themed around Bengali
festivals, and the segments included
festivals like Durga Puja, Diwali, Eid and
Holi.
Next year, Boishakhi Bang will be happening
right here at UMBC, so make sure
you're there!
Comments may be sent
to chat1@umbc.edu

tower of Babel
The ReTRieveR Weekly
OngOing EvEnts
The Imaginary Autopsee
A story of love and ambition directed by Colette
Searls and presented by the UMBC Department
of Theatre in a series of six performances
at the UMBC Theatre.
Wednesday, April 27, 8 pm (preview),Thursday,
April 28, 4 pm (free for the UMBC campus
community),Thursday, April 28, 8
pm,Friday, April 29, 8 pm (talkback and
reception),Saturday, April 30, 2 pm, andSaturday,
April 30, 8 pm
tuEsday, april 26
Homeless in Baltimore
Sportzone. 7p.m-9p.m. Faces of Homeslessness
Speaker’s Bureau will be talking about
Homelessness in Baltimore. Free food along
with live music, donations are welcome and
canned goods.
WEdnEsday, april 27
URCAD 2011
UC. 9:30a.m-5:30p.m. Come and celebrate
Undergraduate Research and Creative Achievement
Day. Poster sessions and oral presentations
along with performances throughout
campus will be held this Wednesday. Come and
support your fellow peers as they have invested
time in their research.
Black and Gold Nominations for:
Half Baked Plan of the Year for 2010 - 2011
Black Light Toga Party
Bring a bed sheet,
we’ll have black lights.
What could go wrong?
Birdland
Operation ® Tournement
at Relay for Life
Failed to Remove
Malignant Tumor
- Lose a Turn -
UMBC Talks
Commons 2B23. Noon. Come and join the
Mosaic Center with this weeks topic: Breaking
down Heterosexism, Homophobia,and
Transphobia. Groups of 10+ please RSVP via
mosaic@umbc.edu.
Say it Loud!
FA 1st floor. Noon. Free hour films by Maryland
Traditions.
Poetry Reading with Joelle Biele.
Library 7th floor. 4:00p.m. Literary Critic and
poet Biele deals with the artistic development
of one of the twentieth centurys most
celebrated poets.
thursday, april 28
Creative Acts: Site Specific Dance and
Music
Joseph Beuys Sculpture Park (behind the
UMBC Commons Garage). 4p.m. A celebration
of visual arts with performances in the UMBC
rock garden inspired by the choice location.
Breaking the Silence Speaker: Yael Shy
LH1. 4p.m. Part of the Relationship Violence
Prevention Speaker Series, learn about the
Circles of Peace Program.This newly developed
program is a group for domestic violence
intervention.
Petition charging
Satirical Cartoonist with
Libel against Greek Life
TRW Lawyer: “I am not
going to waste my time
responding to this shit.”
Scheduling classes
during free hour
without telling anyone
Like transcript fees and
tearing down Hillcrest...
maybe no one will notice
APRIL 26, 2011 arts 15
Program 5: Heremanoko
LH3. 6p.m. Part of the Where do we Migrate
To? series, this film is 90 minutes long.
Bartleby Release Event
Library 7th floor. 5:30p.m. Celebrate UMBCs
own literary magazine come to life. The journal
features fiction, nonfiction, poetry and art
submitted by UMBC students. Free food will be
provided.
Weekly Movie Series: The Rite
LH1. 10p.m . This weeks movie: The Rite. Tickets
are available for $2 at the Commons Front
Desk, popcorn will be provided.
Friday, april 29
Snoop Dogg
RAC. 8:00p.m. Doors open at 7:00p.m. Snoop
will be in the building!!!!!!!
Weekly Movie Series: The Rite
LH1. 8p.m . This weeks movie: The Rite. Tickets
are available for $2 at the Commons Front
Desk, popcorn will be provided.
saturday, april 30
Weekly Movie Series: The Rite
Sportzone. 8p.m . This weeks movie: The Rite.
Tickets are available for $2 at the Commons
Front Desk, popcorn will be provided.
Timb Mantegna
Feminist Bake Sale
Can I make you a
sandwich?
On second thought,
that is genius
man3@umbc.com
Dave Iden
dabe.iden@gmail.com

16 arts APRIL 26 , 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
CRoSSwoRd
ACRoSS
1. Epic
5. Ravines
10. Smack
14. Entice
15. Avoid
16. Stow, as cargo
17. Colored part of an eye
18. Go-between
20. Cougar
down
Queries for Christie
Dear Christie,
I have been a smoker for the past year, and at first it was great,
but now I want to quit and I don't know how. I find myself going on
almost two packs a day, something that is constantly affecting my
pocket as well as my lungs. Whenever I try to go a day without lighting
up, I get cranky, angsty, and jumpy. The longest I've gone without
smoking is five agonizing hours. I've tried nicotine patches and gum,
but they can only get me so far. I know smoking kills you slowly, but I
can't keep my body from craving.
-Smoking in Susquehanna
1. Slide
2. Emanation
3. Smile
4. Connoisseur
5. Plywood layer
6. Affirm
7. Fall behind
8. Ancient Biblical
kingdom
9. Stiff hair
10. Informal language
11. H2O
12. Really love
Sudoku
22. Social deportment
23. Furrow maker
24. Concur
25. Gala
32. Muse of love poetry
33. A literary style
34. Resort
37. Eat
38. Bogus
13. Brusque
19. Silly
21. Vagabond
25. Let go
26. Goddess of discord
27. Alley
28. Marble
29. Blabs
30. Map within a map
31. Refinable rock
34. Slovenly person
35. Gloomy
atmosphere
39. Thick slice
40. East southeast
41. What a book is called
42. Coral island
43. Beyond calculation or
measure
45. Odor
49. Russian fighter
50. Vacation
36. Competent
38. Flipper
39. Exist in a
changeless situation
41. Diacritical mark
42. Dogfish
44. Hinder
45. Bundle
46. Fortitude and
determination
47. Avoid
48. Slander
51. Products of human
Crossword puzzle
for April 25, 2011
Dear Smoking in Susquehanna,
If you have already tried the patch and gum, your next step would
be to join a support group. The people there will help you get to the
bottom of your addiction in order to cure it and help you through
the withdrawal. The campus has resources to help you quit that can
be found on the University Health Services website. However, if you
need an immediate distraction when you consider lighting up, think
about something completely different, like horses (they're completely
underrated). Remember also that you have your friends. Try to hang
out with non-smokers, for it will be easier until you learn to control
your cravings. Find support in your friends because they're there to
help you and they want you to be healthy. And if nothing else stays
with you, look at the cigarette box next time you go stock up; those
boxes usually have some one-liner about how smoking is bad for you.
-Christie
Questions can be sent to arts@retrieverweekly.com
Back to the puzzle.
CRoSSwoRd
Sudoku
Last modified: April 16, 2011
Copyright 2011 Mirroreyes Internet Services Corporation.
mirroreyes.com/crossword
ACROSS
1. Epic 53. A breed of dog
5. Ravines57.
Joyful enthusiasm
10. Smack59.
As well
60. Assistant
14. Entice61.
Step
15. Avoid 62. Canvas dwelling
16. Stow, as 63. cargo Sense
64. Sleep sound
17. Colored part of an eye
65. X X X X
18. Go-between
20. Cougar
22. Social deportment
creativity
23. Furrow 52. maker Tall story
24. Concur 53. Cicatrix
25. Gala 54. Holly
55. Feudal worker
32. Muse of 56. love Parcels poetry of land
33. A literary 58. Prefix stylemeaning
34. Resort“New”
Free Printable Crosswords
37. Eat
Today’s solution Cross-
38. Boguswords
for April 2011
39. Thick slice
40. East southeast
41. What a book is called
DOWN
42. Coral island 1. Slide Solution SoluTionS for 21. Crossword Vagabond TO Puzzle LAST of WEEK’S April 41. Diacritical 18, PUZZLES 2011 mark
43. Beyond krazydad.com/sudoku
calculation or 2. Emanation 25. Let go
42. Dogfish
measure
3. Smile
26. Goddess of discord 44. Hinder
45. Odor
4. Connoisseur 27. Alley
45. Bundle
wHAT To do:
49. Russian fighter 5. Plywood layer 28. Marble
46. Fortitude and
Fill all empty squares
50. Vacation
6. Affirm
29. Blabs
determination
so that the numbers
53. A breed 1 to of 9 dog appear once in
7. Fall behind 30. Map within a map 47. Avoid
57. Joyful each enthusiasm row, column and 8. Ancient Biblical 31. Refinable rock 48. Slander
59. As well 3x3 box. You might kingdom
34. Slovenly person 51. Products of human
60. Assistant want to use a pencil! 9. Stiff hair
35. Gloomy creativity
61. Step
10. Informal language atmosphere
52. Tall story
62. Canvas dwelling 11. H2O
36. Competent 53. Cicatrix
63. Sense
12. Really love 38. Flipper
54. Holly
64. Sleep sound 13. Brusque
39. Exist in a 55. Feudal worker
65. X X X X
19. Silly
changeless situation 56. Parcels of land

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The ReTRieveR Weekly
APRIL 26, 2011 arts 17
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18 APRIL 26, 2011
Battle for
first, pg. 22
The ReTRieveR Weekly
Hartford game
preview, pg. 23
UMBC's toughest competition is itself
Keith Onto and Dominic Devaud have proven to be two of the best multi-performers in the America East
Corey Johns
EDitOriAl stAff
The UMBC men's track and field team
has dominated multiple events in the
America East, and this year is no different.
The only difference is that this time,
UMBC's biggest competition is UMBC.
Keith Onto and Dominic Devaud have
established themselves as two of the top
multi performers in the conference. In
two weeks they'll be going head-to-head
for a gold medal in the decathlon at the
America East outdoor track and field
championships, which the Retrievers
will be hosting from May 7 to May 8.
Last year, Onto won the Decathlon
with 7,239 points, while Devaud was
held out of competition with a redshirt
all of the 2010 outdoor track and field
season.
At the indoor track and field championships
Devaud finished in first place
in the heptathlon, with 5,216 points,
one spot ahead of Onto. That season
exhausted Devaud's eligibility for the
indoor track and field, but between the
end of that season and the start of the
outdoor season, he suffered an injury,
and though it was minor, it was enough
for multis coach Andrew Torge to use a
redshirt on him. This set the Retrievers
up well for a potential one-two finish in
the decathlon this season, as that year
not only let Devaud recover, but also
Courtesy uMBC AthletiC CoMMuniCAtions
Keith Onto won the heptathlon in the winter for the indoor track and field
team and will be defending his decathlon gold he won last year.
allowed him enough time to get better
in some events he was not particularly
strong in, such as the javelin, discus, and
shotput.
"Having 10 events to learn takes time,"
Torge said. "I try to push their redshirt
as long as possible. It just so happened
that it was his senior year; he got injured,
and I thought he had an opportunity to
make a run at the nationals his final year
if he strengthened some of his weaker
events."
Making nationals is the goal for both
UMBC track and field multi runners. To
get to nation as a decathlete has to finish
with a score ranking in the top 24 in the
nationals; usually 7,400 will get a person
there.
"It's a big score," Torge said. "Obviously
they would like to do that, but the
thing about the decathlon is that you're
just trying to progress in what ever way
possible, so you're trying to get your
score total up...If they put a meet together,
they can go."
But even though both guys are competing
for the same team and both have
the same goal to go to the NCAA national
championship meet, they're also
competing with each other. Both want to
wear that gold medal around their neck
when the Decathlon is finished.
The last time the outdoor track and
field championships were held at UMBC
was in 2007, Devaud's freshman season.
That year he saw his brother Charles win
the Decathlon and that has motivated
him to "keep it in the family."
For Onto, he wants to repeat as the
conference champion in the toughest
event in track and field. However, he is
taking a much more modest approach to
the challenge of facing his teammate.
"If he beats me, I'm happy for him,"
Onto said. "I'm not rooting against him.
I'm just going to go out there, do my
best, and that's what's scary about multi
events—anything can happen and anybody
can win in the conference."
The Decathlon is a two-day event
consisting of ten events, including the
100-meter dash, long jump, shot put,
high jump, 400-meter dash, 110-meter
hurdles, discus, pole vault, javelin, and
the 1,500-meter run.
The two competed in the Decathlon
at the Tennessee Sea Ray Invitational
against some of the nation's top Decathletes,
and there Onto finished in fourth
place with 7,025 points and Devaud
finished in seventh place with 6,627
points.
Devaud's specialties in the events include
the hurdles and pole vault, which
were events he took part in while at
Archbishop Curley High School in Baltimore,
MD, but he says he still has a lot
of room to improve in the javelin and
discus. Onto, who transferred to UMBC
after spending his freshman season at St.
Francis (PA), says he still has to work on
the pole vault, but like Devaud, says his
strengths include the hurdles as well as
the high jump.
"When it comes to high jump, I don't
even really practice it anymore because
I've been doing it for so long," he said.
"It's just muscle memory."
With so many events in so many categories,
the two seniors are very likely
the most athletic duo in the conference
in any sport. And while 20 hours of
training a week helps that, their mental
focus has also been a major part of their
success on the track and in the field.
"I say 50 percent of the decathlon is
really mental," Onto said. "You have to
be focused for two days. You're competing
for two days non-stop, and if you
don't do that well in one event you just
have to know how to forget about it or
else it's going to throw your whole score
off and your weekend."
"I think it's as mentally and emotionally
draining as it is physically," Devaud
said. "If you go through a couple of
tough events, it's easy to get down in a
rut and it's hard to get out of it."
Torge, who coached Onto at St.
Francis before accepting a job with the
Retrievers, competed in the decathlon
and heptathlon at Penn State (where
he graduated in 2005) with and against
some of the best track and field athletes
in the nation. But he said that, "these two
guys are easily two of the toughest I've
ever been around. They run workouts
that other people can't even begin thinking
about doing, or that I couldn't do.
It's not because they're so blazing fast,
it's mentally debilitating and they shrug
it off."
Torge recalled one meet where, after
Onto completed the 1,500-meter run,
he saw him shaking, and when he asked
if anything was wrong, Onto's response
was that he wanted to run it again.
"For most decathletes and hepathletes
they fear that all week long. They're like,
'This is going to be awful. But these guys
know it's coming and they don't care,"
he said. "They enjoy it and make it a
strength instead of a weakness."
Also, the two working together each
and every day in practice has helped
them become better athletes.
"We both like to work hard, but, say
you're having a bad day; you come into
practice and you don't want to run hard
but I know Dom is still going to do it. We
kind of push each other and that makes
it a lot easier to train for such an event,"
Onto said. "We train together and push
each other every day and it's the same
thing when we get to the meet. We're not
working against each other. I'm hoping
Dom is in the heat with me for events
because I know he's going to push me to
run faster as well."
With one more meet before the two
will be going head-to-head in the Decathlon
at the 2011 America East Championship
Meet, the two said their goal
now is to stay healthy, but once they
get there the gloves are off and they'll be
competing against each other in the most
grueling track and field event there is.
Devaud said: "As much as I like to see
him [Onto] succeed, I still want to win."
Comments can be sent to
cjohns2@umbc.edu.
Courtesy uMBC AthletiC CoMMuniCAtions
Dominic Devaud is back after redshirting last year and is Keith Onto’s biggest competition for the decathlon this year.

courtesy athletic communications
The ReTRieveR Weekly
Athlete of the week:
Scott JoneS
Chattin’ With: Kim Berghaus
It's not so often that a freshman joins a Division I varsity
tennis program and becomes their top singles player, especially
when they not only have the challenge of transitioning
to the college game on the court, but also to American
life and to the American language off the court. But Kim
Berghaus has not let any of that get in her way and for the
team's last eight games she has been the top singles player
for Rob Hubbard's women's team and since moving into
that spot full time she has gone 6-2
in singles competition. This season
Berghaus started out singles
competition at the No. 2 spot
but her incredible performance
has not only moved
her up, but it has given
the women's tennis
team hope that
Corey Johns
EDitOriAl stAff
With 41 seconds left in the fourth quarter, with the game tied at eight apiece,
Scott Jones cut inside, took a pass from Jos Lustgarten, ran through three defenders,
and bounced the ball into the bottom right of the net to give UMBC a 9-8
victory over the Vermont Catamounts on senior day, giving UMBC their fourthstraight
win and sole possession of second place moving into the final weekend of
regular season competition. When a player scored five goals in a game, as Jones
did against Albany two weeks ago, it is hard to have a repeat performance; defenses
are focusing on stopping them. But Jones had another huge game for UMBC
seven days later, scoring three goals and giving out two assists in the victory. He is
the first Retriever this season to reach the 20-goal plateau.
Comments can be sent to cjohns2@umbc.edu.
they can really contend at the upcoming women's tennis
championship tournament. Berghaus is 11-5 this season
in singles competition and is 9-6 in doubles competition.
The Retriever Weekly: How has this season been going for
you? What does it mean to you to be a freshman playing
No. 1 singles?
Kim Berghaus: It was a great season. It started very well
and I was very happy that I got the honor to play spot
No. 1.
TRW: Did that surprise you at all?
KB: Since I'm a freshman I didn't expect to play one in the
first season but I was really happy about it and I tried to
play as well as I could for this school.
TRW: You played against some great competition in Germany.
How do you think that has helped your out this
year?
KB: Experience in tennis is a lot. It's almost
everything. Without the preparation I
would have never performed as well
as I did.
TRW: How do you think the team
has progressed throughout the year
as the conference championships are coming up
this weekend?
KB: We had ups and down in our season but right now we
are all really pumped up for conference and we're looking
for our best and we're all ready for the most important
part of our season.
TRW: What's the confidence level going into this
weekend?
KB: We're confident. We're not going to
be seeded number one and we're not the
ones expected to win but we have a good
chance to win and if we all play our best
tennis then we can make it.
TRW: Is that just extra motivation for
you all?
KB: Exactly, we have nothing to lose.
We can only win.
Interview conducted by
Corey Johns
hArish trivedi — trW
APRIL 26, 2011 sports 19
LAST WEEK’S RESULTS
M. Lacrosse
UMBC 9, Vermont 8 - Scott Jones scored three goals against Vermont, including
a game-winning goal with 41 seconds in a five-goal game, while Rob
Grimm, Jamie Kimbles, and Connor Finch each scored two goals in UMBC’s
senior-day victory.
M. Track and Field
Morgan State Legacy Meet - UMBC totaled five medals at the eighth annual
Legacy Meet. Martin Nevarez finished with a silver in the pole vault with a
mark of 4.47 meters, while aaron Brooks also has a silver in the discus with a
mark of 46.95 meters. Tim Jones, Shioma Obemeata, and John Rybak all had
bronze medals in the event.
W. Track and Field
Morgan State Legacy Meet - Imani Colbert finished in fifth place in the
100-meter hurdles in 14.41, while Chrissy Robinson finished in sixth place
in the shotput, with a mark of 12.54 meters.
Baseball
UMBC 6, George Washington 3- John Cohn and Samuel Bashion each
pitched three innings in relief and shut out the Colonials as they came back
for a victory after scoring four runs in the eighth inning. Jason Allinder went
3-for-4 from the plate and had an RBI.
Stony Brook 6, UMBC 3 - Max Himmelstein went 3-for-4 and Rich Conlon
went 2-for-4 with a run and RBI but two errors led to all six of Stony Brook’s
runs being unearned.
Stony Brook 11, UMBC 0 - Three more errors set UMBC back, but the
Retrievers managed only five hits and failed to score a run in game two of
their three-game series.
Stony Brook 13, UMBC 2 - The Retrievers were shutout through eight innings
before Brian Klukowicz and D.J. Smith scored in the ninth inning, but
by that point, it was going to take a miracle for a comeback.
Softball
Albany 3, UMBC 0 - Stephanie Weigman shut out the Great Danes through
three innings but allowed one in each of the next three, but UMBC managed
only one hit, which came from Lauren Brummell in the fourth inning.
Albany 10, UMBC 2 - Lauren Brummell and Julie Culotta each scored runs,
but Heather Brown allowed 10 runs off 10 hits, though only four were earned
as UMBC had five errors in the game.
Albany 9, UMBC 0 - UMBC managed only five hits in the game but Stephanie
Weigman had five walks and allowed six runs off five hits while Heather
Brown walked two batters and gave up three runs off two hits.
THIS WEEK IN SPORTS
Tuesday 04/26
Softball at La Salle - 3:00 p.m.
Wednesday 04/27
Baseball vs. Mount St. Mary’s - 6:00 p.m.
Thursday 04/28
M. Track and Field at Penn State Relays - All Day
W. Track and Field at Penn State Relays - All Day
Friday 04/29
M. Tennis at America East Tournament - All Day
W. Tennis at America East Tournament - All Day
M. Track and Field at Penn State Relays - All Day
W. Track and Field at Penn State Relays - All Day
Saturday 04/30
M. Tennis at America East Tournament - All Day
W. Tennis at America East Tournament - All Day
M. Track and Field at Penn State Relays - All Day
W. Track and Field at Penn State Relays - All Day
W. Lacrosse at Albany - 12:00 p.m.
Softball vs. Hartford - 1:00 p.m. (DH)
Baseball at Maine - 1:00 p.m. (DH)
M. Lacrosse at Hartford - 7:00 p.m.
Sunday 05/01
M. Tennis at America East Tournament - All Day
W. Tennis at America East Tournament - All Day
Softball vs. Hartford - 12:00 p.m.
Baseball at Albany - 1:00 p.m.

20 sports APRIL 26, 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
Good
Call
DAN LEVIN
The Gritty Awards
The end of this sports year at
UMBC not only brings the annual
varsity awards, but this year will
introduce the newest award to Retriever
athletics, The Gritty’s. Theywill
be in ESPY-like awards that all
UMBC fans, students, and athletes
can vote for. You can vote for each
award on the UMBC Dawg Blog at
http://umbcdawgblog.wordpress.
com/gritty-awards or by going onto
umbcretrievers.com and clicking on
Vote for the Gritty Awards. The five
awards are Comeback and Breakthrough
Athlete of the Year, Upset
of the Year, and Record-Breaking
Performance and Play of the Year.
Voting goes up until Thursday, May
5 and the nominees are as follows.
The nominees for Comeback Player
of the year are women’s basketball’s
Erin Brown, men’s basketball’s Justin
Fry, volleyball’s Sabrina Hoeks and
men’s soccer’s Dan Louisignau. Fry
came back as a graduate student this
season for his fifth season at UMBC
after undergoing successful surgery
to repair the medial patellofemoral
ligament in his right knee, in order
to prevent the reoccurrence of dislocation.
The injury occurred during a
workout in September, and he was
unable to play at all last season. This
season, he led UMBC in rebounds
per game while averaging 9.2 ppg.
Brown came back this season after
a number of injuries, including a
concussion and a knee injury, to
nearly win the conference player of
the year award. She finished second
in the AEC in three-pointers made
and also led the first-place Retrievers
in rebounding. Hoeks was finally
able to play a full season for UMBC’s
tourney runner-up volleyball team
after missing time the last two years
after tearing both ACL’s. She finished
tied for fourth in the country with
0.58 aces/set and led the team with
3.05 kills/set. Louisignau came back
this season after not playing last year
as a transfer from Virginia, and led
UMBC into the second round of the
NCAA tournament after winning the
starting job midseason.
My Vote: Sabrina Hoeks
The nominees for Breakthrough
Athlete of the Year are swimming
and diving’s Jennifer Kotonias,
women’s basketball’s Tope Obajolu,
men’s track and field’s Trae Proctor,
women’s lacrosse Natalie Rau and
softball’s Ashley Scroggin. Kotonias
broke the school record and won
gold in the 400 IM this season at
the conference championships for
the champion women’s swimming
and diving team. Obajolu led the
conference in blocks this season
after setting a school record with
56, including a record seven in one
game. She also nearly doubled her
career scoring average with 10.6 ppg
this season. Proctor won gold at the
conference meet in the 60m hurdles
Seniors win on senior day, men’s lax takes
sole possession of second place in AE
Corey Johns
EDitOriAl stAff
After a rough start to the season,
the men's lacrosse team won their
fourth-straight game over Vermont,
9-8, on senior day to clinch a spot
in their eighth-straight conference
tournament.
Prior to the game, three players
were recognized for their time at
UMBC. Those three guys were UM-
BC's three seniors: Jamie Kimbles,
J.D. Harkey, and David Stock.
"Being senior day, it's very emotional,"
said Kimbles, who recorded
two goals and an assist to help
UMBC get past the Catamounts. "In
the beginning of the game you see
your parents, but I tried to put that
behind me as much as I could. It's
not easy to do but we got the win."
UMBC did not exactly play their
best game, turning the ball over a
season-high and failing to clear nine
of their 26 attempts, but nevertheless
they got the win and each senior
played a significant role in the victory.
Four years ago Kimbles broke
onto the scene when he scored a
game-winning goal for UMBC in
the America East championship
game against Albany in 2008. Now
as a senior Kimbles has played in
54 games, starting 21 in his career,
including every game his junior season.
Kimbles started this year with
a hamstring injury that kept him
out of the majority of the preseason
and the first few games but this year
he had scored nine goals with eight
assists, giving him 31 goals and 22
assists in his career to go with 32
ground balls.
While Harkey has not started a
game in his years as a Retriever, he
has seen time in 44 games as either
the team's primary face-off specialist
or as a defensive midfielder. Harkey
in an IC4A-qualifying time of 8.19.
Rau is 9-3 this season as the women’s
lax goalkeeper after playing very
limited time in her first three years.
She leads the team with 82 saves
and a 41% save percentage. Scroggin
leads the softball team this year with
10 homeruns and is second with 25
RBI’s while batting .294.
My Vote: Tope Obajolu
The nominees for Upset of the Year
are men’s soccer over Princeton in
the First Round of the NCAA Tournament,
women’s swimming and
diving over Boston University to win
the America East title, women’s lacrosse
over No. 17 Towson, women’s
basketball over Boston U. on their
way to winning the regular season
crown and men’s basketball winning
an away game at Maine. Men’s soccer
won their first AEC Tournament this
past year and took their talents to
the NCAA tournament. They drew
No. 10 Princeton in the first round
and beat the Tigers 2-1 on goals by
Levi Houapeu and Andrew Bulls.
Women’s swimming and diving re-
began his career in 2007, and in
2009 he became the team's primary
face-off man but suffered an ACL
injury after five games. Last year he
came back and continued his role
as the team's face-off specialist and
won 105 of his chances at the X, becoming
the 21st Retriever to eclipse
the 100 win mark in a season, and
while he started this season with the
job again, he moved to a role as a
short-stick defensive midfielder. In
his career the 2011 co-captain has
scored two goals and has two assists
gained their spot at the top of the
AEC, winning their first title since
2008. They upset Boston U who
was unanimously picked in the preseason
to win the conference. Women’s
lacrosse beat their cross-town
rival Towson by scoring five straight
second-half goals, snapping a streak
of six losses to the Tigers. Women’s
basketball upset the preseason number
one, Boston U, to take the lead
in the regular season standings, one
they would never relinquish. Men’s
basketball picked up their fifth win
of the year at Maine, who was 8-2 in
the conference prior.
My Vote: Men’s Soccer over No.
10 Princeton
The nominees for Best Record-
Breaking Performance are women’s
basketball’s Tope Obajolu, track and
field’s Sara Parkinson, swimming
and diving’s Abbey McKenney and
Brad Reitz, men’s basketball’s Justin
Fry and softball’s Stephanie Weigman.
Obajolu recorded a UMBC
record of seven blocks against Coppin
State on November 16 to help
with 56 ground balls and 155 faceoff
victories in his career.
Stock joined the Retrievers last
season after earning First-Team All-
America accolades at CCBC-Essex,
but became the team's starting close
defender this season and has started
10 of the team's 11 games. This year
Stock has scooped up 15 ground
balls and has caused six turnovers.
"Senior day is not easy," said
UMBC Head Coach Don Zimmerman.
"It's a very emotional day and
sometimes you want something so
the Retrievers get their first win of
the year. Parkinson broke the school
records in both the 5,000m and the
3,000m runs in consecutive weeks.
McKenney broke two individual records
and four relay records at the
conference championships, where
the women won their third AEC
title. Reitz broke the 200 fly and the
200 IM records along with two relay
records at the conference championships
where the team won its 14th
straight title. Fry became the first
Retriever to ever score 20 points and
bring down 20 rebounds in a game
when he did it against Hartford on
February 19. Weigman broke the
all-time UMBC record for wins with
her 58th career victory on April 23
in a victory over Stony Brook.
My Vote: Brad Reitz
The nominees for best play of
the year are tennis’ Gaulthier Berret,
softball’s Lauren Brummell,
men’s lacrosse Scott Jones, women’s
basketball’s Michelle Kurowski and
men’s soccer’s Levi Houapeu and
Dan Louisignau. Berret saved six
hArish trivedi — trW
Jamie Kimbles started his senior year injured and when he came back he was out of position playing on the attack,
but after the moved back to midfield his production went up and he has nine goals with eight assists this year.
bad you end up shooting yourself in
the foot. You want it so bad you can
taste it. I think that happened a little
bit today. I think our seniors obviously
were excited to play; it's an
emotional day. Was it our best game?
No, but they [the seniors] have been
great leaders and they were great
leaders down the stretch today and I
couldn't be happier for them to win
this game on senior day."
Comments can be sent to
cjohns2@umbc.edu.
match points and came back from
one set down to give UMBC the 4-3
win over Temple on April 11. Brummell
hit for the cycle with three RBI’s
in a 14-2 win over Morgan State on
March 12. Jones scored five goals,
including three straight in the second
half, to give UMBC the win
on April 16 over AEC rival Albany.
Kurowski matched her career high
30 points on 12 field goals in a win
against Binghamton on January 12.
Houapeu recorded his third career
hat trick in a 3-1 win against AEC
rival Vermont on October 27. Louisignau
recorded a save against Joe
Corsello of New Hampshire to set
up UMBC’s win in the conference
championship game.
My Vote: Dan Louisignau
The official winners will be announced
at the Varsity Awards Banquet
on Monday, May 9.
Comments can be sent to
daniel23@umbc.edu

The ReTRieveR Weekly
Men’s tennis tourney preview
Dan Levin
EDitOriAl stAff
The America East Championship's is
the only thing currently left on the schedule
for the UMBC men's tennis team. The
tournament is set to kick-off on April 29
at Yale University in New Haven, Connecticut.
UMBC - Against America East opponents
UMBC is 1-1 after they defeated
Hartford 7-0 but fell to Binghamton
6-1. Mwali Phiri is 13-4 on the year at
number six singles in his senior season.
Gaulthier Berret is 12-3 on the year and
is 7-3 at number five singles where he
has spent much of the year. Christian
Hodel has been the number one singles
player this season for the Retrievers and
is 9-9 on the year at that position. Only
one Retriver has been nationally ranked
this season and that is Joe Adewumi who
is 12-6 on the year and 6-3 at number
two singles. Adam Duprat is 6-6 on the
year and is 4-3 and number three singles.
He and Berret also form a formidable
doubles team.
Binghamton - The Bearcats are looking
for the fourth straight AEC title and
were the preseason favorite. They are
led by Sven Vloedgraven at number one
singles where he is 19-2 on the year. Arnav
Jain is 16-2 at number two singles
this season however the team is only
40-44 this year in doubles matches. The
Bearcats are 3-0 against AEC opponents
this year and are a combined 19-1 in
those games with the lone loss coming
when UMBC's Gaulthier Berret defeated
Ruben Haggai at number five singles.
Boston University - The Terriers
proved victorious against Hartford in
their only America East contest of the
year. Josh Friedman is 1-8 at number one
singles this year and Jarred Pendleton is
4-5 this season as well as 2-1 at number
three singles.
Hartford - The Hawks are 0-4 against
other AEC teams this season and are not
likely to come out victorious in the tournament.
No individual or doubles team
has a winning record this season and the
Hawks are 40-118 in singles competition
as well as 24-61 in doubles. They did not
win any matches against AEC opponents
and were a combined 0-27.
Stony Brook - Stony Brook is 1-1
against AEC opponents this year and are
led by their number one singles player
Nikita Fomin who is 10-5 at that slot.
Only two of their doubles teams have
overall winning records and are also 9-7
at the number three singles spot. They
swept Hartford 6-0 but were defeated
6-0 by Binghamton.
Comments can be sent to
daniel23@umbc.edu.
Women’s tennis tourney preview
Dan Levin and Corey Johns
EDitOriAl stAff
UMBC - The Retrievers are 1-1 on
the year against AEC opponents. They
fell 7-0 to Binghamton but were able to
defeat Hartford 7-0. Kim Berghaus has
dominateed competition this season
and though she is only a freshman, she
is 11-5 this year, 7-2 at the team’s No. 1
singles player. Julia Gragera-Cano, who
has primarily played No. 3, has also
gone 11-5 this season.
Albany - It has not been a good sea-
son for the 3-8 Great Danes, who’s top
singles player, Susan Ma, has gone 4-13
this year. Aubrey Brooks has a teambest
11-6 record, primarily at eigther
No. 3 or No. 4 singles.
Binghamton - The Bearcats might
be the team-to-beat in the conference
and are likely going to be the top seed
in the tournament. Anna Edleman has
led the team with a 14-5 record at No.
1 singles while Jillian Santos is 13-6 in
singles. Yulia Sminova, Emma Leibowicz,
and Marina Bykovskaya all have
more than 10 dual singles wins this
hArish trivedi — trW
Despite only being a freshman, Kim Berghaus, a native of Germany, has
moved into the No. 1 singles spot for UMBC and is 11-5 overall.
hArish trivedi — trW
Rasid Winklaar was one of the top junior college players in the nation last
year and has been a great addition to UMBC’s men’s team this season. The
junior has moved up to No. 2 singles this year and is 12-3 overall.
season as well.
Boston University - The reigning
AEC champions fell in their only AEC
match this year to Binghamton 4-3. Stefanie
Nunic has held down the number
one singles spot for the team and is
13-2 on the year including 13 straight
wins going into the tournament. Vivien
Laszloffy is 8-5 on the year at number
two singles and the team of Laszloffy
and Nunic are 11-3 in number one
doubles this year.
Hartford - Hartford has struggled
this season and has been swept by
UMBC. None of their playes have a
winning record but Kaitlyn Lemon
leads the ground with five wins in 12
tries.
Stony Brook - They have a 1-1 record
against AEC opponents with a win
against Hartford and a loss to Binghamton.
Nina Lagvilava is 8-4 this season at
number one singles for the Seawolves
and along with Gayatri Krishnan has a
2-0 record in doubles matches. Lagvilava
is also 4-0 at number two singles
while Aylin Mehter holds a 4-0 record
at that spot. Overall Stony Brook is
67-29 in singles matches and 20-19 in
doubles play.
Comments can be sent to
sports@retrieverweekly.com.
Corey’s
Corner
COREY JOHNS
Men’s lacrosse’s turnaround
can be linked
to Scott Jones getting
in the right position
I'll admit it, coming into this season
I had never even heard of Scott Jones
of the men's lacrosse team. Last year as
a freshman, the 22-year-old from Prot
Coquitlam, British Columbia, Canada
played and only a handful of minutes
in 12 games and took only nine shots at
the goal, with only two of them going in.
But this year, Jones has become the first
Retriever to hit the 20-goal mark and is
having an all-conference worthy season.
Last Saturday, on senior day against
Vermont, Jones scored five points with
three of those being goals, his third being
a game-winning goal with 41 seconds
left in the game. A week before that
performance, Jones scored five goals
against Albany, four of which came in
the fourth quarter as the Retrievers got
a 13-9 road win.
So where did this guy come from? In
the first game this season Jones was part
of the first midfield and scored four goals
with an assist against Presbyterian, but
in the team's next three games, which
were against Rutgers, North Carolina,
and Johns Hopkins, he started to fizzle
out a bit, though he did record a point
in each game with a goal against Rutgers
and assists against both North Carolina
and Johns Hopkins. But the team's fifth
game was really his coming out party.
With the team having lost three
straight games, men's lacrosse coach Don
Zimmerman was looking for a way to
APRIL 26, 2011 sports 21
mix things up and make his team better,
so he moved the 6-foot-4, 215-pound
Jones from midfield up to attack, and
against Maryland he scored three goals,
though it was in a losing effort.
After that game, Zimmerman knew
where Jones had to play, saying "I'm going
to keep him on attack. I'm not going
to take a guy who had three goals and
move him off attack."
Ever since, that decision has really
paid off, as he scored at least two points
in five of the next six games, a span in
which UMBC has gone 5-1 in, the lone
loss being the game where he was shutout.
"He's in the right position now," Zimmerman
said following his five-point
performance against the Catamounts.
"He played in front of the goal; we don't
ask him to carry the ball, and he's starting
to get a real good rhythm and feel
of the other guys on offense, and he's
finishing his shots."
In front of the goal is a position that
Jones is built for. His size lets him push
his way through defenders and his experience
in box lacrosse games, indoor
games in Canada that are played on
smaller fields, taught him how to catch
and shoot in tight spaces.
But more than just a position change,
Jones is figuring out how to play the
game of college lacrosse. He's no longer
rushing his shots; he’s waiting longer for
the best shot instead of just taking the
first shot.
"Scott was trying to get rid of the ball
too quickly for a while," Zimmerman
said. "He had a lot of quick sticks."
Zimmerman told Jones the old John
Wooden saying, "Be quick but don't
hurry."
"Scott was being quick and hurrying
so he's taken the hurrying aspect to it,"
Zimmerman said. "He's holding the ball
a little bit longer and I think it's paid
off."
Comments can be sent to
cjohns2@umbc.edu.
hArish trivedi — trW
Scott Jones is the first Retriever to net 20 goals this season.

22 sports APRIL 26, 2011
The ReTRieveR Weekly
Erika Braerman
Alicia Krause
C.J. Durham
10-5 (4-1 AE) 14-0 (5-0 AE)
The Retrievers’ attack is based around three upperclassmen,
all of whom have been prolific scorers throughout
their entire career. Erika Braerman has been one of the
highest-scoring attackers in the conference the last four
years, totaling 74 goals and 56 assists in her career so
far. This season, she’s already scored 27 goals and has
17 assists. She controls the game from behind the net,
and while she is certainly capable of scoring herself, she
has plenty of weapons to work with on the attack. Emily
Coady may not be having as productive of a season as
she had her first two seasons, but she has still scored
19 goals and has 10 assists. Ashley Stodter, who will
also play in the midfield, is fourth on the team with 25
goals.
The Retrievers have a lot of swing players. Like Stodter,
Alicia Krause and Amanda Pappas will both play up the
field, but wherever those two find themselves, they always
put themselves in positions to score. Krause leads
the team with 49 points, with a team-high 34 goals and
15 assists. Pappas has scored 105 goals in her career, and
ranks second on the team this season with 32 scores.
Also adding some offense to the midfield: is Lindsay
Cox (10 goals) and Kristen Bilney (8 goals). Madi Bell
(3 goals, 4 assists) has plenty of scoring ability, but she
is more used as a defender, and has 17 ground balls and
11 caused turnovers in her first season at UMBC. Meagan
Linkous (9 ground balls, 6 caused turnovers) and
Kristen Milligan (18 ground balls, 3 caused turnovers)
are also defensive midfielders.
UMBC’s defense goes much farther than just the girls that
line up in the back. Stodter (21 ground balls, 9 caused turnovers)
and Krause (26 ground balls, 17 caused turnovers)
are both big offensive threats, but they are also two of the
team’s top defenders, while Bell, Linkous, and Milligan will
all move back on defense when the opposing team has the
ball. C.J. Durham has been one of the team’s top defenders
for four years, causing 70 career turnovers and getting 66
ground balls, 14 and 16 this year, respectfully. She anchors
a group that allows less than 10 goals per game and causes
over seven turnovers per game. Jessica Harkey (11 ground
balls, 6 caused turnovers) and Lauren Mundell (13 ground
balls, 9 caused turnovers) are also key pieces to the league’s
third-ranked defense, while goalkeeper Natalie Rau has
stopped 82 shots this season in 723:09 minutes.
Attack
Midfield
Defense
Overall
With 13.79 goals per game, the Albany women’s lacrosse
team has the best offense in the America East conference,
and much of that has to do with their devastating
duo up front of Taylor Frink (29 goals, 35 assists) and
Jodi Battaglia (38 goals, 13 assists). Frink is second on
her team with 27 ground balls, showing her defensive
awareness, but thanks to so much talent around her, she
also leads the conference in assists. Katheen Lennon and
Persy Sample have each scored seven goals this year.
Arian Parker is one of the conference’s top goal scorers
and is most likely going to be the conference’s Rookie of
the Year after scoring 33 goals, getting 20 ground balls,
and causing 18 turnovers. Nikki Branchini is another
player that is very similar to Parker: somebody that can
score a lot, but can also get back and play well defensively.
Branchini has scored 20 goals this year, scooped
up 29 ground balls, caused 18 turnovers, and also leads
the conference with five draw controls per game. Rachel
Burek (20 goals), Amanda Pollock (16 goals), and Allie
Phelen (11 goals) just add to the high-scoring offense
the Great Danes have.
There’s a reason Albany is undefeated so far this year.
Not only do they have the league’s top offense, but they
also have the league’s top defense, allowing only 6.57
goals per game. Stephanie Kemf anchors the group with
18 ground balls and seven caused turnovers, while Jenn
Primeau has 12 ground balls and seven caused turnovers.
Michelle Primomo is a defensive midfielder that
is playing back and has 13 ground balls and nine caused
turnovers, but she’ll come up the field and has scored
four times this year. Anna Berman has 76 saves in goal
this year.
Taylor Frink
Nikki Branchini
Stephanie Kempf
Albany wants revenge. Last season, UMBC spoiled their perfect conference record in the semifinals of the America East tournament, and while UMBC does not score quite as much as they used to, they are
still very capable of beating them again. The only difference is that Albany is not only undefeated in conference play, but they haven’t been beaten all year. There is a lot at stake in this game; the winner gets
home field advantage throughout the conference tournament and both teams have been very successful on their own turf. With both the best offense and best defense in the conference, Albany is definitely
a challenges, but UMBC has plenty of weapons, has played some great competition this season already to prepare for this game, and knows they have beaten them before and can beat them again.
uMBC heAd shots Courtesy uMBC AthltiC CoMMuniCAtions Content Provided By Corey Johns AlBAny heAd shots Courtesy AlBAny AthletiC CoMMuniCAtions

Scott Jones
Jamie Kimbles
Brian McCullough
The ReTRieveR Weekly
6-5 (3-1 AE) 8-6 (2-2 AE)
Since Scott Jones was removed from the midfield things have
been going well and the team has gone 5-2. Jones leads the
team with 20 goals and is coming off of two huge games in
which he totaled eight goals and two assists. Alongside him
up front is junior Rob Grimm who, despite a tendency to turn
the ball over, leads the team with 15 assists to go along with
12 goals. Of the rest of the unit, a bunch of freshmen and
sophomores have stepped up as the season has progressed. Joe
Lustgartern has seven assists this year, including one to Jones
for a game-winning goal against Vermont with 41 seconds left,
and has scored twice. Matt Gregoire has returned from an eye
injury after scoring four goals with two assists, while Ryan
Johnston (4 goals) and Greg Korvin (3 goals) will mix things
up, up front.
Like the attack with Jones, the midfield has come around ever
since Jamie Kimbles has been moved back to his natural position
after starting the season on attack. But since he's moved
back, Kimbles has not only scored nine goals with eight assists,
but he's moved the ball around well to other guys. Meanwhile,
Dave Brown (12 goals, 10 assists) is in the midst of a breakout
year in which he's started 10 of 11 games while, Zach Linkous
has scored five goals with four assists. Scott Hopmann missed
a few games with injuries, but has provided the Retrievers
with 10 goals in nine games, seven of which he started. Neill
Lewnes has scored six times this year, but also has a team-high
37 ground balls with six caused turnovers. Conor Finch seemingly
came out of nowhere against Vermont, scoring two goals,
after coming back from injuries and being put into the team's
second midfield.
UMBC's defensive effort has really been helped out by junior
goalkeeper Brian McCullough, who has saved 84 shots, which
is over half of what he's been faced with. Zimmerman tends to
go with eight different long sticks in the back. The starting three
on defense have primarily been David Stock (15 ground balls,
6 caused turnovers), Aaron Verardi (14 ground balls, 4 caused
turnovers), and Sam McKelvey (16 ground balls, 4 caused
turnovers). Tim Shaeffer (8 ground balls, 5 caused turnovers)
will see plenty of time as will Riley Hansen (6 ground balls,
3 caused turnovers), Lucas Wood, and long-stick midfielders
Ethan Murphy (20 ground balls, 8 caused turnovers) and Nathan
Klein (7 ground balls, 4 caused turnovers). Breck Merritt
(5 ground balls) is also an option Zimmerman has gone with
on more than one occasion. J.D. Harkey, Tony Spada, Brian
Patton and Jake Zimmerman have all played significant minutes
this season as defensive midfielders.
Attack
Midfield
Defense
Overall
The Hawk's second-ranked offense that averaged 10.31
goals per game is led by the trio of Ryan Compitello (15
goals, 22 assists, 28 ground balls), Rory Numacher (21
goals, 9 assists, 14 ground balls), and Aidan Genik (20
goals, 8 assists, 13 ground balls), all of whom are capable
of having big games on any given night. There is not much
depth up front for Hartford, only Drew Haif (1 goal, 2 assists)
has scored from their bench, but with three guys like
them, depth is not a huge issue.
Carter Bender has been the man for a while in Hartford
and has scored 24 goals and has 16 assists so far this season.
Martin Bowes (12 goals, 11 assists), Jared Franze (19
goals), Tate Klidonas (11 goals), Vinny Pellizzi (3 goals, 2
assists), and Adam Yee (2 goals, 3 assists) have also been
solid compliments to Bender while Tim Fallon (2 goals, 1
assist) has been one of the conference's top face-off specialists,
winning 183 of 291 attempts from the X while scooping
up 123 ground balls.
Scott Bement has been the main reason that UMBC has lost to
the Hawks the last two seasons, but Frank Piechota has surpassed
him as the team's primary goalkeeper, and this season,
in 11 games and 10 started, he has saved 97 shots, which is
53.9 percent of the shots he's been faced with. But Bement
has been back in goal for Hartford the last few games and has
40 saves in five games, four of which he's started. He too has
over a 53 percent save percentage, so no matter who they put
in, UMBC will have their work cut out for them. In the field,
Conor Flynn (66 ground balls, 34 caused turnovers) is one of
the conference’s best long-sticks, while Scott Kessler (8 ground
balls, 8 caused turnovers), Frank Piechota (25 ground balls),
Dan Gillespie (15 ground balls, 7 caused turnovers) and Steven
Groccia (3 ground balls, 4 caused turnovers) have all also
seen significant time, and have been major parts of the Hawk's
defense that allows only 8.57 goals per game.
APRIL 26, 2011 sports 23
Ryan Compitello
Carter Bender
Conner Flynn
Hartford is in an unfamiliar position this year, with the potential to host a conference tournament game if they were to beat UMBC. If UMBC wins, they could host the tournament. The last two years, even
when the Hawks have been a struggling team, they have upset the Retrievers at the very end of the regular season, so this time UMBC is going to be ready. The last two years, UMBC had their spot in the
tournament settled, and Hartford was out of the tournament, making the always dangerous matchup of a team with nothing to play for against a team with nothing to lose. But this year, the Retrievers are the
hunters, even though they are higher in the standings than Hartford. With a different dynamic in the game, UMBC very well may extend their winning-streak to five-straight.
uMBC heAd shots Courtesy uMBC AthltiC CoMMuniCAtions Content Provided By Corey Johns hArtFord heAd shots By steve MClAughlin

The ReTRieveR Weekly
APRIL 26, 2011 sports 24
IT’S TOURNAMENT TIME
The men’s and women’s tennis
teams will be playing in the AE
tournament this weekend
see page 21
PiCtured: MWAli Phiri hArish trivedi — trW
18 Top decathletes
21 Scott Jones finds his spot
WEB M. Lax tops Vermont