mummiez & daddiez magazine

In this issue of
6 Is Early Schooling Too Academic for Our
Children?
8 Real Life Story
11 Competition
16+18 New—Mummiez in
Business
22 Diary of a Bedtime
Routine
24 Are You a Slave to the
Scales?
25 Celebrity : Match the
Babies to their Celebrity Parents
26 Fashion
28 Beauty
32 Magical Mummy
34 How to Eat with a Fussy Toddler
36 Temper Tantrums
Welcome
Valentines day is on it's
way. Are you all feeling
the love?
Come on ladies and you
guys too, where‘s the
romance for the other
364 days of the
year? The nights out
together, the cosy nights
in together and the just
being plain silly
together. lets not just
limit ourselves to one
night of romance a
year.
Make time and show you
care.
Claire
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The mummiez & daddiez team:
Claire Philcox - Director
Leroy Robinson - Marketing Publicity
Aaron Ali - Graphic Designer
Accredentials
Our writers this issue:
Claire Philcox
Leroy Robinson
Kate Beddow
Hannah Aldwinckle
Romina Mua
Joanna Swan
Sharon Mercieca
Jennifer Shroff Pendley, PhD
Photographers:
Coloniera 2
Joana Jablo
alesia17
George Hodan
Petr Kratochvil
Belovodchenko Anton
With thanks to flickr, Stock.XCHNG,
publicdomainpictures.net

This simple sponge can be eaten on its own, but is
made a more sumptuous with a few delicious
additions: vanilla and chocolate. This recipe
makes two sponges, both of which are covered in
chocolate-vanilla icing.
PREPARATION TIME: 20 MINUTES
COOKING TIME: 25 MINUTES
Serves 6-8
Ingredients:
Easy Vanilla & Chocolate Cake
SPONGE
225g (8oz) self-raising flour
225g (8oz) butter/spread, at room
temperature
225g (8oz) caster sugar
4 medium eggs
1 teaspoon baking powder
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
ICING:
1-2 tablespoons butter/spread
100g milk chocolate, broken into squares
100g plain chocolate, broken into squares
4-5 tablespoons milk (whole or semi-skimmed)
ICING:
1 tablespoon vanilla
culinary flavouring
2-4 tablespoons icing
sugar
Preparation:
SPONGE:
Preheat the oven to 180
degrees C / gas mark 4.
Measure and sift all the
dry ingredients into a
large bowl.
Whilst the sponge cools on a wire rack, place
butter in a saucepan and melt on a low heat.
Add the chocolate and stir. As it begins to melt
add the milk and vanilla culinary flavouring.
Once the mixture is smooth and silky, add the
icing sugar and stir thoroughly. It should
thicken into a spreadable paste. If not, add a
little more icing sugar.
Spread the chocolate-vanilla icing over the
exterior of each sponge.
Can be eaten warm or allowed to cool.
MONEY-SAVING TIP 1: Use basic supermarket, self-raising
flour and basic spread (as long as it is suitable for baking).
MONEY-SAVING TIP 2: Try using granulated sugar if caster
sugar is too pricey. The cake may not be as light though.
MONEY-SAVING TIP 3: Use two tablespoons of vanilla
culinary flavouring in the sponge if you don’t want to buy
vanilla extract.
Leroy Robinson

Happy Valentine’s Day
to My Grandma
Dear Grandma, you’re so special
You do such nice things for me;
You love me just the way I am;
You make me happy as can be!
I’ve got the best grandma in the world!
I love you.

Is Early Schooling too
Academic for Children?
PARENTS often hear the words "I don‘t
want to go to school! " or "I want to play
with my toys instead" during their child‘s
first few years of school, but do we here
in England push children into education
too soon potentially causing long term
academic harm? I had a chat with a few
parents and a Nursery teacher to see what
their thoughts were.
Children need to be taken into school as
early as possible in order to start
interacting with other children and to get
a heads up on any valuable life skills.
Reading to her children at home is a
normal activity for Lianne Matthews of
Hertfordshire, but she strongly feels that
her children are too young to be dealing
with the stress of trying to academically
learn, and that fun is more important than
homework at their young age. The
importance of school for Lianne is that of
socialising and learning the skills that the
children can use in later life, rather than
an academic lesson for things such as
English or Maths.
Dr Richard House, a co-founder of the
Open Eye and Early Childhood Action
movements, argues that there is sufficient
proof that starting school earlier does
more bad than good for our children. He claims that
children should follow the Early Years Foundation
Stage; this is a statutory framework that sets the
standard in which all early year care providers must
provide in order to ensure that children learn and
develop well, whilst also being prepared for school.
The three prime areas that the EYFS looks at are:
communication and language, physical, social and
emotional development. The EYFS is extremely
play based and aims to prepare a child for school
rather than helping them to get a heads up. Once
children have been given this opportunity they will
be ready to tackle the academic schooling that faces
them.
What harm can starting school early do? Those were
the words of Nursery teacher, Claire Punter. In her
own words "I personally don‘t see any problem with
a child becoming academically developed at a
younger age. Surely the sooner you start the better?
"The children that Claire teaches and looks after
learn via playing games, whilst also using academic
methods and were described by her and other mums
at the nursery as "bright and on-the-ball". Wouldn‘t
we all like our children to be described as that?
Hannah Aldwinckle

As children are our future, the mummiez & daddiez team thought it
would be a great idea if you could you to send us your cute/funny
pictures for us to feature here! If you would like your child’s photo
featured, please email photos to claire@mummiezanddaddiez.co.uk
together with their names.

Real life story
I was 15 years old when I gave birth to my beautiful
daughter Sam in 1989. I found out when I was 4
months pregnant. I told my family when I was 5
months pregnant. My mum was polite when I told her
but I could see was not happy, she was embarrassed
and expressed that this is not how she had imagined life
for me to be. My dad on the other hand was unhappy
and he was not afraid to tell me exactly how much! Our
father daughter relationship broke down from that
point. My sister was the only one who was happy for
me, she was jumping with excitement when I told her I
was pregnant, although this was
down to immaturity as she was only
8 but it still felt good that someone
was happy. I had mixed feelings
and was still at school.
My mum showed she cared by
encouraging me to eat healthy.
I absolutely hated going to the antenatal appointments.
“It was me and my
little girl against the
world.”
I would look at couples in the waiting room looking
excited and giggling away together, then there was me
on my own. I felt lonely and isolated. The fact that I
was only 15 and that I looked young anyway was
another factor, people would look, stare and tut.
I was so petit before falling pregnant then I put on so
much weight, gained so many stretch marks and they
would bleed. I started to feel so low, more than I did
before.
There was not any support around for expectant young
parents back then. I was advised to leave school for
health and safety reasons, this was
upsetting as it meant I did not get to
see my friends much.
I finally went into labour I had never
felt so scared. I was so young and
not knowing what to expect.
Unfortunately there were
complications with the labour. I was in labour for 23
hours and was exhausted I was in a bad
way. Both mine and my baby‘s heartbeat
started to deteriorate.
After having a long drawn out labour I
finally gave birth to my beautiful daughter.
However things were not straight forward,
cord was wrapped around my daughter‘s
neck, her head was out but the shoulders
were stuck. The midwife panicked and
pulled my daughter out as she could not
breathe she was being strangled by the
umbilical cord.
Finally my daughter was born she was
beautiful perfect in each and every way. I
was in hospital for 5 days before being
allowed home. The midwives were
fabulous, kind and helpful.
As time went on I noticed something was
not right so after tests and examinations on
my daughter the results showed as her
having ‗erbs palsey‘ this was all due to the
force of the midwife pulling my daughter
out during labour. I was upset and
shocked. I was worried how this may
affect her in the future.
I took my daughter for intense
physiotherapy sessions. This was a tough
and testing time but we got through it. The
physiotherapy was great.
After being home for a few weeks I started

to feel lonely. One family member came round with
a gift for my daughter. I really appreciated this as no
one else had bothered. My family really down
played the fact I had a baby, my sister was still
excited and loved the thought of having a baby in
house. I guess it was like having a real life dolly
around for her.
My school friends would pop round every now and
then during
“I had a new lease of
life, I felt amazing”
their lunch
hour but
this became
more and
less
frequent as time went on.
I would often sit in my room and just cry, I was
becoming depressed. It got to the point that I would
never leave the house I would stay in all day.
My friend came round and said ―this is ridiculous,
coming out with me‖ she helped get my daughter
ready while I was getting myself together. I was
feeling anxious about going out. My friend wanted
to push the pram. I was given a second hand pram; it
was alright I was grateful otherwise I would have had
nothing!
The outing did me the world of good. We only went
for a long walk but this gave me the confidence to go
out with my baby.
My dad still found the situation difficult and would
not even look at his granddaughter. My mum helped
out with the feeds and said if I needed help I should
ask.
I was given a council flat at the age of 16. It was
what seemed like a million miles away. I became
isolated and more depressed. This was so hard for
me being away from my mum and sister. I moved
more local to my mum but had to live in a bed &
breakfast. It was possibly one of the most awful
experiences of my life. It was me and my little girl
against the world.
My depression was getting worse. It got to the point
where my mum wanted to adopt my daughter.
I was assigned a social worker via the doctor. She was
an amazing positive lady to have in my life. To this
day she has no idea how much of a positive impact she
had on me. She absolutely loved her job and was so
passionate about it. She spent so much time with me,
we talked and talked and this was exactly what I
needed. She built my self esteem, my confidence was
sky high and I felt genuinely happy and content with
my life.
I enrolled for computer courses, helped run a preschool
and started going to church.
I was ready for more, I was ready for the next stage of
my life so I enrolled in a full time college course and
had great child care for my daughter. I had a new lease
of life, I felt amazing.
I have since had two more children and have 2 grand
children. I am thankful and am appreciating them all
and still enjoying life. I am proud of myself and my
children.
I completed my college course, did voluntary work and
went on to complete a university course. I am in a well
paid job working with families which is incredibly
rewarding.
I feel this is all down to my social worker. I would
love to know where she is today so I could thank her.

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Parenting the American Way
I'm getting a little tired of reading how
parents in (or from) other countries are
superior to American parents. First, we
had Tiger mum Amy Chua, the Yale
professor who practically beat her
children on the head with a stick if they
didn't practice piano and violin for five
hours straight every day. Now, we have
Mademoiselle Mama, the American
woman living in Paris who marvels at
the angelic behaviour of French
children, in this Wall Street Journal
article:
“Why was it, for example, that in the
hundreds of hours I'd clocked at French
playgrounds, I'd never seen a child
(except my own) throw a temper
tantrum? Why didn't my French friends
ever need to rush off the phone
because their kids were demanding
something? Why hadn't their living
rooms been taken over by tee pees and
toy kitchens?”
All right, I get the message about
waiting. Americans, and especially
their kids, don’t appear to value this
skill as much as their European
counterparts. Sorry, Parisians. Maybe
this proclivity toward impatience is why
we've had more success in business.
However, whenever I hear a mum
saying that her 18-month-old still wakes
up for a bottle in the middle of the
night, I cringe. That's just not good for
anyone. Please, allow the baby to learn
how to cry it out a little bit so that
both of you can finally sleep through
the night.
Later in the article, the author alludes
to the fact that Americans spend way
too much time playing with and
attending to their kids: "For me, the
evenings are for the parents," one
Parisian mother told me. "My daughter
can be with us if she wants, but it's
adult time."
With all due respect, here is my
rebuttal to this latest assault on
American parenting:
1. Temper tantrums: what's wrong
with these? Frankly, I'm glad my kids
had tantrums, even in public places.
Toddlers are wound-up balls of energy
and if those emotions and erratic
impulses don't come out now, they
surely will later when they're teenagers
driving your car and out of sight doing
God-knows-what. There’s been plenty
of research on the positive benefits of
tantrums. I’d much rather my child
learn how to express their emotions
when they are little, rather than grow
up to be a passive-aggressive adult with
pent-up anger and self-destructive
tendencies.
2. Children who interrupt. Yes,
whenever I get the phone the kids
invariably tug on my sleeve and ask any
number of non-urgent questions. Do I
get off the phone? No. I simply say
“child to wait until I'm done”. Usually,
they actually manage to do so, even if

they aren’t quiet about it. It's just not
normal for Americans to have
conversations with no interruptions. I
don't think it is normal for Italians or
Greeks either and I think that's okay.
Can you imagine if it was unacceptable
to interrupt people who cannot finish a
thought?
3. Living rooms as forts. Kids should
engage in free play. They do not
understand that such activity is
confined to their bedrooms. Really, do
I care that they're building a play
restaurant in the dining room? Or that
every blanket in the house is on the
couch, wrapped around various stuffed
animals for the "animal hospital"? I love
the creativity and it's worth the mess.
My couch pillows aren't too nice to be
used for "hot lava” obstacle courses on
the kitchen floor. It is tiresome that
the house is a disaster more than 50
percent of the time, but at least the
kids are using their brain in a healthy
fashion which is more than I can say
about playing video games all
afternoon.
4. Independent play. I'm a staunch
believer that kids need to learn how to
play independently. In the evenings,
however, when my girls have been at
school and in afterschool activities all
day and I've been working, I'm ready to
hang with them! If my six-year old asks
me to play "Trouble" for the fifth night
in a row, I'll do it. The older they get,
the less time they're going to want to
spend with me, so I’m taking it now. I'll
get a lot more "adult time" when the
girls are in high school.
Parenting is all about setting the right
balance for you and your family. I
disagree with the Tiger mum philosophy
of relentlessly pushing your kids to
excel and not allowing them to engage
in trivial activities such as play dates,
nor the French mother philosophy of
pretending that children are miniadults.
We all have different cultures,
economic backgrounds and societal
challenges which mean that there's no
right way to parent. Most of us do the
best we can. There are days when I
know I've been an unpleasant, easy-toanger
mother. I try to move on and do
better the next day.
Can Americans do better? Well, yes.
Americans are often helicopter parents,
for one. I'm not sure why, perhaps
from our in-bred colonial ambition but
also because our public schools suck. If
we don't stand up for our kids, who
will? We Americans can be a loud,
outspoken bunch, so naturally our kids
may seem like out-of-control, spoiled
brats to parents in other countries.
Maybe some of our kids are just, loud?
Could we push our kids harder and
make them more accountable? Well,
yes.
A little of the French way and a bit of
the Chinese way is fine, here and
there. But I'm an American, and I'll be
damned if I won't parent the American
way whatever that is.
Courtesy of......
Frazzled: Tips and Stories from
Working Moms@Home

Les Misérables by Victor Hugo, the greatest novel
of all time! Set in the early 19th century, the story
Les Misérables followed the lives of many
characters, it focuses primarily on the ex-convict
Jean Valjean and his experience of redemption
having been released from prison after serving 19
years for stealing a loaf of bread. Valjean breaks
his parole and is pursued for years by the
relentless police Inspector Javert. The book
details the history of France in particular the 1832
rebellion in Paris and themes of love, romance,
struggle and justice run deep through the book.
Many of you may know Les Misérables as the
Broadway musical produced by Cameron
Mackintosh and directed by Trevor Nunn. It was
the first production of this musical in English. The
musical is a box office hit worldwide. I sat in the
Point theatre Dublin 20 years ago to watch it and I
have to say nothing I have attended since has
surpassed it. The story, the acting, the music and
the passion were amazing and uplifting. Broadway
musicals are not something I get to see very often,
both because they are expensive and I don’t live
on the doorstep of the West End! So twenty years
have passed and I have missed Les
Misérables and yearned to go back. Recently I
got the opportunity to take a night off from the kids
and head out with a friend to see the newly
released movie of Les Misérables the musical,
directed by Tom Hooper. Could it be as good, not
possible, there is no way I thought, but sure its
worth a look! Off I went with my friend, taking
some Ferrero Rocher with me, I thought I may as
well share the calories with her (both of us
breaking the New year’s diet resolution we
promised).
So the movie..could they really put the most
popular musical of all time on the big screen and
have the same effect? Star studded cast, Hugh
Jackman (Jean Valjean), Russell Crowe (Javert),
Anne Hathaway(Fantine), Amanda Seyfried
(Cosette), Sacha Baron Cohen (Thenardier) and
Les Miserables
the movie, unforgettable!
Helen Bonham Carter (Madame Thenardier). The
movie has been getting good reviews, critics are
suggesting that it may well get nominated for a
few Oscars and it recently won three golden globe
awards. The acting was superb, it had all the
passion of the broadway production and more,
because its big screen there is probably more of
an expectation for high quality acting. It is difficult
to achieve both high quality music/singing and
acting and especially by the same actors. I can’t
say that it was like the musical because of course,
a movie is completely different. It was though, one
of the best movies that I have seen in a long time,
I loved it! The actors delivered not only great
acting but fantastic singing, every conversation is
sung. Russell Crowe’s portrayal of Javert and his
relentless pursuit of Jean Valjean is brilliant and
passionate. Jackman truly does ensure that we
feel Jean Valjean’s pain and redemption. The
close up camera work allowed us to see every
expression in detail. ‘Fantine and Cosette’, we felt
so sorry for them, we were heartbroken for them,
nearly in tears living it with them. Sacha Baron
Cohen is probably the last actor I would have
thought would be in Les Miserables. He did
though, provide light relief and humour in the role
of the Inn Keeper Thenardier. We laughed at his
antics and those of Madame Thenardier ( Helen
Bonham Carter) and so do the rest of the
audience.
All in all I have to say the movie is amazing, an
emotional rollercoaster, the audience feeling every
emotion, Valjean’s redemption and even the
passion of the 1832 rebellion. My friend said she
loved it and is going back for a second viewing
and I am definitely buying the DVD when its
released. If you get a chance do go see it, you
don’t need to have read the book or speak french,
just dig out some Ferrero Rocher and of course
buy some popcorn, be prepared for an emotional
evening though!
reviewed by Meg

I am lucky enough to
do the things that I
really enjoy but it has
taken a lot of hard
work to get there! I
am involved with a
number of projects; I
have recently started
to run classes for
children to improve self esteem giving
them some much needed self
awareness around emotional literacy
to manage feelings. This is what I
am passionate about! I also offer
psychotherapy and counselling in
private practice and co run a business
called Creating Change with
a wonderful business
partner, mum of three who
also fosters, her name is
Jacci Jones; (she has a very
supportive husband!) we
have a number of different
training courses covering;
dealing with challenging
behaviour in children and
adolescents, to personal
awareness for mums and
dads too.
I never hide how my
journey into working
therapeutically with adults
and children came about,
Creating Change
as I am proud of the
difficulties I faced and
where I have now got to!
At the age of 25 years,
after working in a
number of very
competitive sales jobs, I
ended up having a
breakdown and spent a
month in the priory hospital (very
posh I know but in reality not great!)
Without going into all the detail as to
what got me there. (As we would be
here all day) With the support of my
husband and family I made some
huge life changes and subsequently

trained in TA psychotherapy.
Although I would not wish the
experience of severe anxiety
and depression on my worst
enemy, it has impacted my
life in a positive way and got
me to where I am now! I
work for myself, I love doing
what I do and I also have a
fantastic five year old little girl
and love being a mum! (Most
of the time)
I believe the key to success in
running any business is work
life balance, and a healthy
mind (hence the name of my
business) as without this, life
gets in the way of your motivation,
determination and hence your
success! I get involved in as many
networking opportunities that I can
and try to surround myself with like
minded people as this always helps! I
think it’s also vital that we also
understand our motives for anything
that we do, why we want to do it, in
order for it to work and so I suppose
being in therapy as a trainee
therapist for over four years has also
helped a lot!
This is also the vision and passion
behind Healthy Minds and Creating
Change, as I believe that self esteem
and self awareness are a huge part of
our success in life not to mention
comfort and stability on our personal
lives too, and so the younger we can
catch our children and develop these
areas, the better their lives will be. If
I had my way it would be a much
bigger part of the school curriculum
than it is currently and we would see
much more prevention rather than
cure and a lot less adults suffering
with things like anxiety and
depression.
I think my daughter Maia will follow
in my footsteps as she has a great
sense of self and has already started
her own little business at the age of
five.
Sarie

FMC Pave the Way
We are students,
a business
women, a
graduate, single
mothers of two,
tutors, and
assessors, an internal verifiers,
educators, advocates, qualified
boxing instructors and organise and
run boxing tuition, alongside
organising, running, coaching and
participating in, football tournaments
and as you can see very busy
women. All of this would not be
possible if not for the educational
journey taken and the kindness
received from others as well as hard
work and dedication of the whole
team.
We are the co-founders of a new,
not for profit, youth and community
organisation called Future M.O.L.D.S
Communities, a mouthful we know
so, FMC for short. We are a social
enterprise and aim to identify and
challenge social injustice and help
others do the same, responding to
the needs of and
run by members
of the local
community. We
work towards
reducing the
numbers of those who are not in
employment, education or training
and providing free positive activities
for young people and support
services for adults, developing
effective partnership work and
challenging inequality and
discrimination. FMC believe that
everyone should have the
opportunity to ‘learn through
experience’ and aim to be
inspirational leaders of change
through innovative and relevant
ways of learning. We support the
challenging of negative labels and
the development of aspirational
futures.
We are triple award winners having
scooped two Barking & Dagenham
Business Awards in 2012 and then
going on to receive the Docklands
Business Awards. Our next aim is to

move up another step and win the
National Business Awards. We are
also working with UEL with the view
of taking FMC global. We are keen
to support and work with other
single and young mums in the
community to show just how
powerful we can be!
We are always looking to develop
innovative ways of learning and new
projects and services. These
services are supported by our
dedicated and hardworking team of
volunteers and apprentices. Central
to our work is community
involvement so if you would like to
join our dynamic and pro-active
team, please do not hesitate to
contact us either through our
website www.futuremc.org.uk or via
telephone 0208 594 1398. Possible
services you could participate in
range from football and boxing to job
club and sofa surfers housing
project. We can also support you in
developing ideas you may have to
improve the community you live in.
We would love to hear your views
and experiences in the community so
please feel free to contact us. Thank
you!

Make 2013 a Happier Year
We all want to live happy and fulfilling
lives and we want the people we love to
be happy too.
So happiness matters to all of us.
Childhood Obesity
.
The story of a Young entrepeneur
Homework Tips for Children
Do Dads Make Better Parents?
Spending on a Want or Need Basis
Would you be a Stay at Home Mum if you Could Afford to?
Action for Happiness is a worldwide movement (founded in
2010) of around 25,000 members committed to building a
happier society.
In summer 2012 the local Barking/East London Action for
Happiness group was started. We are a social enterprise in
the form of a local community charity; we are passionate
about creating connections and strengthening social
innovation. We meet on the first Thursday of every month
from 7-9pm at the Spotted Dog Pub in Barking to share our
creative ideas about creating greater connections, which
leads to greater happiness. We share our ideas and vision
about future events and activities we would like to see taking
place.
Our Mission is through learning, sharing and action we bring
to life the 10 keys to happier living, which latest research has
found tend to make people's lives happier and more fulfilling.
Together they spell "GREAT DREAM".
We are holding our very first event in Barking, which is a
workshop titled ‘Introduction to Practical Meditation’ with
guest speaker Roy Maunder on Thursday February 21 st . The
cost is just £5 to attend the 2.5 hour workshop from 6-
8.30pm.
� Future events will include the screening of a film called
'Happy' - an inspiring documentary about how we can
all be happier and future workshops all relating to the
10 keys and general personal growth & development.
For more information on attending the events or to share
your ideas about contributing to a happier society please call
Sharon on 07947253033 and like our facebook page http://
www.facebook.com/ActionForHappinessBarking
We have no religious, political or commercial affiliations and
welcome people of all faiths (or none) and all parts of
society.

My son Jamal is 13 months old. Since Jamal was
born his sleeping pattern has been absolutely
diabolical leaving me totally exhausted. I felt I had
tried every trick in the book but nothing was
working.
Jamal would eventually fall asleep at roughly 1am
every night/early morning. I would still have to
wake up at 6.30am to wake up my 2 other children
A mother’s diary...
A bedtime routine
for school.
I would wake up Jamal at 7.30am to
get him ready. Surprise, surprise he
would end up sleeping the whole of
the journey and then for the majority
of the day too!
I should have woken him up during
the day really in a bid for a better
night‘s sleep however as I worked
form home this was the only
opportunity I had to get any work
done. The bills still need to be paid at
the end of the month.
As the 2013 New Year was
approaching I kept telling myself I
will get Jamal into a normal bedtime
routine. I had tried everything except
for changing my way of thinking.
Changing my negative thoughts of
feeling overwhelmed to ―I can do
this!‖ I knew if I kept telling myself I
could do this in advance it was
mentally preparing me.
Week 1:
The first night was tough for both of
us especially Jamal as he usually had
the run of the house until 1am every
night/morning, but not anymore.
Every night from 8.30pm I bathed
Jamal, put his pyjamas on and gave
him some warm milk and kept
repeating myself to him ―you are
going to go to sleep like a good boy
for mummy honey‖ with a comforting
smile on my face.
We would stay in the bedroom with
the door a jar and the light off. I would then start to
pace the room singing his favourite nursery rhyme,
Twinkle, Twinkle little Star. I knew I could have
been making a rod for my own back with the pacing
up and down but I just could not leave him
screaming in his cot. I know that works for some but
this was not how I wanted it.
Finally after half an hour Jamal fell asleep. I carried

out the same routine during the course of a week and
all was going well. Jamal was having a 2 – 3 hour
nap during the afternoon from around 1.30 onwards.
This was pure bliss for me. I actually was able to
wake up in the mornings refreshed, what a lovely
feeling.
Week 2:
This was still going surprisingly well. Jamal was so
much happier and so was I. I had more time for my
other children as I was not so tired and ratty all the
time. All it took was a change in my mind set.....
Incredible, I wish I had started to do put this routine
in place so much sooner rather than just ‗getting on‘
with things.
Week 3:
I feel I can honestly say that ―this is a mission
accomplished.‖

Following the Festive Season are you battling
with your scales to lose the holiday weight you
gained or pressuring yourself into meeting your
New Year’s Resolution to lose weight?
As a Personal Trainer I find there are two types of
clients; the client who is obsessed with being
weighed and the client that dreads the prospect of
being weighed. My philosophy with most things in
life is about balance and this philosophy also applies
to weighing yourself or being weighed.
The key things to remember when weighing yourself
are;
Weigh at the same time of day, preferably first
thing in the morning.
Consistency - if you weighed yourself naked last
time, and/or before breakfast then do the
same again the next time. Keep your
hydration levels consistent as this influences
what you way on the scales (more on this
later).
Set a specific day and time in the week that you
know you will stick to.
Weighing scales are the most common choice
when measuring personal progress against weight
loss. But are they the most reliable?
After working with hundreds of clients over the
years, I have seen cases where the client‘s
appearance will drastically change; clothing size will
drop, but no immediate weight loss on the scales.
This outcome for some can be an obstacle when
continuing on a weight loss programme as the person
can question ―what is the point‖? For someone
obsessed with weight loss this can be seriously
demotivating.
Our body weight is made up of fat, muscle mass,
bone mass, visceral fat (around our abdomen/organs)
and water content/hydration. When using traditional
weighing scales all we see is our total weight made
up of all of the above. Therefore we cannot see the
breakdown of what is truly important, which is a
drop in body fat and an increase in muscle.
To find out these vital statistics, it is more valuable
to weigh using a body composition monitor. This
retails from around £30 online. I recommend the
omron BF511 which retails for around £40.00 online
If you prefer not to weigh yourself at all or you do
not want to invest in the body composition
scales then it would be beneficial to measure
yourself once a week with a measuring tape, or
your clothing to observe your progress,
depending on how well a specific item of
clothing fits from week to week.
My final tips
It is important to choose a method of
measurement to track your progress that
feels right for you.
On your weight loss journey avoid
comparing your progress with others as
this just adds unnecessary pressure.
Try measuring your success in other ways.
Such as improvement in your energy
levels, improved mood, better
concentration and improved fitness.
Sharon Mercieca

Match these
top celebrity
baby names of
all time with
their parents
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As the cold winter is slowly drifting away let‘s look
ahead to the following months. With the month of
Valentines fast approaching, let‘s spread a little love
by clothing - so better start looking early for the
perfect gift for him, her or the little ones this
February.
This issue all the clothes seen are from H&M with a
touch of ‗amour‘. The shop provides a lot of simple
and affordable clothing as well as stylish. Stores can
be found dotted around the UK.
For the girl (aged 18 months to 8 years)
This outfit is perfect for any little girl. What girl
does not LOVE pink, I certainly do. For mum and
dad, this outfit is good for the wallets and keeps the
daughters happy. The two-top pack is practical and
durable for the busy bees and can be worn to any
occasion. The trousers are also practical and
comfortable for any day in the park whilst looking
like a lil' princess. The bag is a sweet accompliment
to the outfit and allows her to feel like a grow up and
somewhere to put her pocket money. Just make sure
she does not lose it!
For the boy (aged 18 months to 8 years).
For the little boy the outfit has to be pratical, and
these clothes are definitley that. Red is the best
colour to show their happy and cheeky side. Every
little boy needs a polo shirt, this one is smart and
also good for everyday use. The red trousers are bold
and will not restrict any activity they do. Frinally,
the t-shirt. It is long-sleeved so it will keep boys
warm in any season - the badger will be honoured to
be a part of your son's outfit.

For him
Men love shirts - so you will be winning
when you give this to your fella. The
shade of purple is not too bright, so there
is nothing to complain about. It is a good
way to make sure he is smart at all times
without any nagging. The jumper is
perfect to battle the cold winds in
Feburary and stripes are popular amongst
men - so there is nothing to worry about!
These chinos are cheap as well as
practical.
For her
Spring is fast approaching us and this set
of clothes are perfect for women out
there. They are fresh, bright and sutiable
for any stroll in the park. The shoes are
cheap and cheerful and add a splash of
colour to any outfit, from working to
dinner. The rubber material can be easily
cleaned, so no worries about getting
them dirty. The lace-pattern top is girly and trendy
and looks great. To top the set off is the wonderful
blouse. The bold purple colour looks beautiful and is
not tight fitting so
you can walk with
ease. It is
definitley great for
them lazy days in
front of the TV or
even a night on the
town with
girlfriends.
Joanna Swan

Hair Loss

Something I have come across a lot lately
is people talking about their hair falling
out. Hair loss is completely normal. The
hair constantly renews itself; it has a well
defined life cycle. When a hair dies,
another replaces it and makes it fall. It is
therefore normal that you lose some hair
every day; this can be between 40 and 120
strands a day, depending on how much hair
you have, your age and your hair's growth
cycle. People with fine hair have a
tendency to have more of it and
consequently will lose more than people
with thick hair.
Commonly hair loss is caused by a number
of factors. Season – you will lose more
hair in winter when hair reaches the
maturity in its growth cycle, Anaemia –
having iron deficiency is a common cause
of hair loss, Ageing – as you get older
follicles start to die off, pregnancy –
usually post pregnancy women experience
hair loss, stress and illness – stress,
excessive weight and thyroid problems can
all cause hair loss.
There are so many treatments for hair loss
but it‘s the safest to stick to the natural
way. A few good methods I have come
across are:
Diet - A diet that contains mostly whole
foods, particularly plants such as
cucumbers, potatoes, peppers, and even
bean sprouts are rich in the mineral silica
and add to hair strength. Foods like lean
meats are high in iron and are essential to
the protein based building blocks of hair
growth.
Natural juices - You can use either garlic
juice, onion juice or ginger juice. Apply to
the scalp directly wither twice a day or
leave it on overnight and wash it
thoroughly in the morning.
Hot oil treatment – Heat any natural oil -
olive, coconut, canola - so that it is warm,
making sure it‘s not too hot. Massage it
gently into your scalp. Put on a shower
cap and leave it on for an hour, then
shampoo your hair.
Antioxidants - Put two bags of green tea
in hot water and brew. Once it is warm
apply to your scalp and leave for an hour
before rinsing. Antioxidants are found in
green tea, which prevents hair loss and
boost hair growth.
Practice meditation - The most common
cause of hair loss is stress. Meditation can
help in reducing that and restore hormonal
balance.
Get a head massage – Having a regular
head massage or massaging your scalp for
a few minutes daily will help stimulate
circulation.
Good circulation in the scalp keeps hair
follicles active. Circulation may be
improved through massage by using a few
drops of lavender or bay essential oil in an
almond or sesame oil base.
Romina Mua

New Report says Children
can Recover from Autism
Autistic Spectrum disorders such as autism,
pervasive developmental disorder and Aspergers
Syndrome are a group of disorders that affect
social and communication skills. The spectrum
itself is wide with some forms of autism
showing significant delay in cognitive
development and others such as Aspergers
showing little to no delay.
It is thought that rates of autism in children is
increasing globally with as many as 11 children
in every thousand affected. There may indeed
be an increase or it may be that there are now
better diagnostic methods and criteria that mean
that more children are getting
diagnosed. Support and teacher education in
schools may also mean that children are being
referred for assessment.
Previously it was thought that Autism was a
lifelong disorder with no cure available. A new
report published by the University of
Connecticut has found that children may in fact
outgrow autism. Dr Deborah Fine and her team
studied 34 children who had been diagnosed
with autism in early childhood. They found that
they went on to function just as well as 34 other
children in their classes at school. The study
showed that they now showed no symptoms of
problems with social and communication
skills. The cause of autism is not known,
genetics, environmental exposures, viral
infections and digestive disorders have all been
suggested as possible causes.
Children may not in fact outgrow autism but the
years of intervention therapies undertaken by
parents, caregivers, outside agencies and the
children themselves may in fact have significant
impact and improve the social and
communication skills of children affected by
autism. More research into the long term results
of these therapies needs to be carried out.
A diagnosis of autism can help families
understand and work with their child; it can also
help the children understand themselves. The
NHS in Northern Ireland provides support to
families with autism, children at risk of autism
can be referred to social communication clinics
that can assess for autism. Occupational and
speech therapy is available to help children
improve communication and learn strategies to
overcome the social problems they have.
Often children with autism have sensory
problems such as being sensitive to noise,
certain sounds, smells and textures. These can
impact their everyday lives significantly. Once
they learn strategies to overcome these it helps
them live and learn and achieve along with their
peers. It is also thought that digestive issues and
intolerances to certain foods such as gluten in
wheat, milk and milk products and additives
could have an impact. Sometimes when these
are removed from the diet parents report a
significant improvement in how their child
functions and achieves in their everyday life.
There are two support organisations for Autism
in Northern Ireland. They provide advice and
guidance as well as training courses for parents,
caregivers and professionals working in the
field.
Their contact details are:
National Autistic Society, Belfast Tel: 028 90
687066 http://www.autism.org.uk/
AutismNI Tel: 02890401729 (Mon, Wed, Fri
9am to1pm) http://www.autismni.org/
National Autistic Society, London Tel: 020
7833 2299 http://www.autism.org.uk/
Meg

When I became a mummy I was
completely prepared! I knew every piece of
equipment I needed, I knew that my life
would be turned upside down, that I needed
to child proof the house, how to care for
her, how she would grow and develop and I
knew I wouldn‘t be able to go out as much
anymore, I was ready... or was I? It took
me until my daughter was about 3 years old
to realise that I hadn‘t been prepared at all
for the biggest change... losing myself into
motherhood.
Don‘t get me wrong I love being a
mummy, it is what I was born to do. I love
the tears, the laughter, the mess, the
development, it doesn‘t faze me and I
embrace most things. But I also love being
Kate, and not just ―Laura and Daniel‘s
Mummy‖. I think I was so determined to be
the best mummy I could be that I immersed myself in
motherhood and lost Kate somewhere in the process. The
irony is it is all the things which make me Kate which
make me a good mummy. I love being creative, I love
singing, I am calm, I love reading and I am patient but I
love time to myself and when I get that time I am
reminded who Kate really is and am much better at being
―Laura and Daniel‘s Mummy‖ again.
I‘m sure most mums have had a day away from the
children and gone back home feeling recharged and
knowing that they have more patience and are just
handling things better so why do we not enable ourselves
to have more times like that?
In my work as a children‘s healer I see many families who
are suffering because the mums have had to deal with
things, maybe a bereavement or illness, but they haven‘t
given themselves the time they needed and this has had a
knock on effect on their child‘s emotional state. It doesn‘t
have to be something so enormous to have an impact on
us either. A bad day at work, traffic jam, someone being
rude to us in a shop, all have an impact on our mood and
as emotional beings we need time to process this and deal
with it. As mums, realistically we don‘t get that time very
often, the knock on effect is that we pass this negativity
onto our children; we tell them off, we lack patience, w
don‘t engage them in the same way we usually would.
Having observed this for many years in parent I decided
to create a workshop where mums could come along, to
Magical Mummy
Workshop
be pampered, meet other mums in the same situation and
discuss what they need help with. Throughout the day
offer advice, tips and encouragement and also remind
them of things which may help them to rediscover what
makes their heart sing. As part of the day we do simple
activities which reinforce our new promises to ourselves
and learn a little about how meditation and relaxation can
actually help us to stay calm during even the most
difficult parenting days.
My Magical Mummy Workshops are always very
popular, I host them at home so numbers are limited, I
could probably fill at least double the places but then it
would change the day and part of what makes it special is
the relationships built during the day, the personal details
(home cooked lunch, goodie bag etc) and everyone having
chance to talk. My last workshop was in April and we had
such a fabulous day, chatting, encouraging,
congratulating, creating and making some wonderful
friends.
My next Magical Mummy Workshop is taking place on
Sunday 7 th October and places are already being booked.
If you are a Mummy who is craving some quality time
and would like to join us you can find out more details on
my website (www.katebeddow.co.uk) or my Facebook
page (GrowingSpiritKids) or follow me on Twitter
(@GrowingSpirit) for more news.

Tracey Hurricks – “To be honest I don't
mind which. I have saved a lot of money by
generous people passing down clothes
particularly when my two were babies. Brand
new is nice but not always accessible ”
Paula Williams - "I had everything brand new as he was
my first and everyone wanted to buy me things. Am keeping
absolutely everything to use again with the next as it's all in
perfect condition and money will be tighter ."
Louisa Harrington - “Pre owned as it a lot cheaper for me having 5
children it costs more if you buy everything brand new .”
Marie Jones – “ It all depends on
what it is and the condition it’s in
really, I would never buy second
hand shoes but would buy and do
sometimes buy pre owned clothes if
they are like new. I have in the
past bought pre owned off ebay
and when arrived not been good so
end up getting rid of them.”
Nadia McClenaghan – “Depends in the quality of pre owned
thing and what it is.... Certain things I would not buy like
clothes, I would take second hand of family etc but would not
buy them. I got the baby a second hand high chair off Ebay a
few months ago, was in excellent condition and was local!! All
my kids have had used things at some point!! As long as they
are clean and in good condition!! Just would not buy clothes.”
Lauren Grodent – “I'm happy
to buy pre owned toys and
games etc but when it came to
buying equipment like buggy
and bottles I wanted new.”

‗Five a day keeps the doctor away‘ is not such a
realistic quote when your child won‘t even so much
as touch a pea, or look at a carrot is it? Now I‘m sure
you will all agree when I say that most parents fear
that time in their lives when their child will say no to
veg. They will dread the day that their child groans
at the mention of dinner and worry about their child
leaving the fruit in their lunch box. Am I right? Well
have no fear, fussy eater tips are here!
These eight tips will keep you on the road to raising
a happy, healthy child with no
issues with fruit or vegetables what
-so-ever.
TIP ONE- The environment that
the child eats in needs to be
relaxed. There is nothing more offputting
for a child than knowing
dinner time means pressure time.
It has been scientifically proven,
that children who face less
obligation to eat their fruit and
vegetables, eat more than that of a
child who is forced and pressured
into doing so. So that‘s tip one,
make dinner time enjoyable and
not a chore.
TIP TWO- You are NOT a
personal chef. The final decision
on what is eaten for dinner should
primarily be down to the parents.
If a child kicks up a fuss about
what is for dinner, this should be
ignored. Dinner should be given to
the child as normal and he/she will
soon learn that they cannot control
the situation.
TIP THREE- Eat together. In this
day and age it has become
increasingly popular to eat dinner
round the television on the sofa.
With parents finishing work at
different times it seems to be more
of an everyday struggle to eat
How to Cope with a
Fussy Eating Toddler
dinner together. However, when a child is sat
around a table with people that he/she trusts then
they will feel more comfortable in eating the same
food as it will look normal. If it is too much of a
struggle to get sat down at the same time, why not
invite some of your child‘s friends round? A child
will be a lot more likely to eat up their greens if they
see their friend doing so across the table!
TIP FOUR- Make an effort to reward good eating
habits. Now this does not mean if your son or

daughter eats a banana then you should give them a
cookie. It is better for the child‘s health and
wellbeing for the reward to be something that is not
material, for example if the child eats all their
vegetables at dinner, or fruit from their lunch box
then the reward will be a trip to the park or
swimming pool. Exercise is always good, and
children just see it as fun! So what better way to
reward them, then with something that keeps them
fit?
TIP FIVE- Less is more. Giving your child a plate
piled to the high hills with carrots is extremely
daunting for a child. One tablespoon of vegetables is
fine at first while you ease the child into the food
that they are refusing to eat. After a while you can
slowly increase the quantity until it is a reasonable
helping.
TIP SIX- Take the kids food shopping! Children
love trips out and what better way to introduce them
to food that‘s in a supermarket? A fun game you
could play is create a mini shopping list for the child
and allow them to partly do the shop for you. Once
they find each object they can tick it off of their list.
Children love games like this as it is like hide and
seek and they feel proud being able to say that they
have completed the challenge. Another reason that
children like to go on the food shop with parents is
because it makes them feel like they have slight
control over the situation. Even though in all
circumstances the parent(s) will be in control, the
child will feel differently. This will lead the child to
believe that the dinner they are eating has been
chosen by them, therefore they do not feel pressured
(this relates to tip one).
TIP SEVEN- Make the food look fun! There are lots
of ways to make food look fun. I‘ll give you a few
examples. How about making a plate of carrot sticks
and celery sticks that look like the sun with a nice
dip in the middle? When giving them food try to
assemble it to look like a face, this way it is more
appealing to the child. Children love to get messy
fingers, so give them meat on the bone and big
chunky carrots to munch on! Just make sure you are
prepared for the mess! Finally, add a bit of colour to
the dish. Make sure it has different colours or it will
look bland to the child and this will not encourage
them to eat it!
TIP EIGHT- Last but definitely not least, get the
children involved with the creation of meals!
Whether it‘s sprinkling the cheese, pouring the flour
or mixing the sauce, children love getting stuck in
and getting their hands messy! Letting the child
make their own food gives them a sense of control
over what they‘re eating whilst also educating them
on how to cook.
Here are a couple of recipes that are fun to
make with the children.
MINI MUFFIN PIZZAS
You will need:
� One English muffin
� Tomato puree -2 tbsp
� Personal choice of meat
� Yellow and green peppers
� 1 Fresh tomato
� Sweet corn
� Red onion sliced
� ½ cup of Mozzarella grated
� Salt and Pepper to season
� Slice the muffin into two halves creating 2
bases for your mini-pizzas
� Toast the muffins until golden brown
� Cook the onions until softened
� Spread the tomato puree on the base
� Layer up with your toppings (can alter to
choice)
� Place under grill four approximately 4
minutes until the mozzarella has melted.
TUCK IN!
BANANA ICE LOLLIES
This one is a perfect summer snack.
You will need:
1/2 banana per person
20g melted milk or dark chocolate
Lolly sticks
� Push the stick inside the halved
banana.
� Roll the banana in the chocolate until
evenly covered.
� Place in freezer until the child is
peckish
ENJOY! Hannah Aldwinkle

The dreaded temper tantrums......
Your toddler's second temper tantrum of the day shows no
signs of stopping, and supersonic, ear-shattering, teeth-
jarring screams pierce the air. You'd run away and join the
circus if only that were a real option. There must be a
better way.
Temper tantrums
During the kicking-and-screaming chaos of the moment,
tantrums can be downright frustrating. But instead of
looking at them as catastrophes, treat tantrums as
opportunities for education.
Why Kids Have Tantrums:
Temper tantrums range from whining and crying to
screaming, kicking, hitting, and breath holding. They're
equally common in boys and girls and usually occur
between the ages of 1 to 3.
Kids' temperaments vary dramatically — so some kids
may experience regular tantrums, whereas others have
them rarely. They're a normal part of development and
don't have to be seen as something negative.
Unlike adults, kids don't have the same
inhibitions or control.
Imagine how it feels when you're determined to
program your DVD player and aren't able to do
it, no matter how hard you try, because you can't
understand how. It's pretty frustrating — do you
swear, throw the manual, walk away, and slam
the door on your way out? That's the adult
version of a tantrum. Toddlers are also trying to
master their world and when they aren't able to
accomplish a task, they turn to one of the only
tools at their disposal for venting frustration — a
tantrum.
Several basic causes of tantrums are familiar to
parents everywhere: The child is seeking
attention or is tired, hungry, or uncomfortable.
In addition, tantrums are often the result of kids'
frustration with the world — they can't get
something (for example, an object or a parent) to
do what they want. Frustration is an unavoidable
part of their lives as they learn how people,
objects, and their own bodies work.
Tantrums are common during the second year of
life, a time when children are acquiring

language. Toddlers generally understand more than they
can express. Imagine not being able to communicate your
needs to someone — a frustrating experience that may
precipitate a tantrum. As language skills improve,
tantrums tend to decrease.
Another task toddlers are faced with is an increasing need
for autonomy. Toddlers want a sense of independence
and control over the environment — more than they may
be capable of handling. This creates the perfect condition
for power struggles as a child thinks "I can do it myself"
or "I want it, give it to me." When kids discover that they
can't do it and can't have everything they want, the stage is
set for a tantrum.
Tantrum Tactics
The most important thing to keep in mind when you're
faced with a child in the throes of a tantrum, no matter
what the cause, is simple and crucial: Keep cool. Don't
complicate the problem with your own frustration. Kids
can sense when parents are becoming frustrated. This can
just make their frustration worse, and you may have an
escalated tantrum on your hands. Instead, take deep
breaths and try to think clearly.
Your child relies on you to be the example. Hitting and
spanking don't help; physical tactics send the message that
using force and physical punishment is OK and can
actually result in an increase of negative behaviours over
the long run. Instead, have enough self-control for both of
you.
First, try to understand what's going on. Tantrums should
be handled differently depending on the cause. Try to
understand where your child is coming from. For
example, if your little one has just had a great
disappointment, you may need to provide comfort.
It's a different situation when the tantrum follows a child
being refused something. Toddlers have fairly simple
reasoning skills, so you aren't likely to get far with
explanations. Ignoring the outburst is one way to handle it
— if the tantrum poses no threat to your child or others.
Continue your activities, paying no attention to your child
but remaining within sight. Don't leave your little one
alone, though.
Kids who are in danger of hurting themselves or others
during a tantrum should be taken to a quiet, safe place to
calm down. This also applies to tantrums in public places.
Preschoolers and older kids are more likely to use
tantrums to get their way if they've learned that this
behavior works. Once kids have started school, it's
appropriate to send them to their rooms to cool off.
Rather than setting a specific time limit, tell your child to
stay in the room until he or she regains control. This is
empowering — kids can affect the outcome by their own
actions, and thus gain a sense of control that was lost
during the tantrum. However, if the time-out is for
negative behavior (such as hitting) in addition to a
tantrum, set a time limit.
After the Storm
Do not reward your child's tantrum by giving in. This will
only prove to your little one that the tantrum was
effective. Instead, verbally praise a child for regaining
control.
Also, kids may be especially vulnerable after a tantrum
when they know they've been less than adorable. Now
(when your child is calm) is the time for a hug and
reassurance that your child is loved, no matter what.
Make sure your child is getting enough sleep. Sleep is
very important to kids' well-being and can dramatically
reduce tantrums. The link between lack of sleep and a
child's behavior isn't always obvious. When adults are
tired, they can be grumpy or have low energy, but kids
can become hyper, disagreeable, and have extremes in
behavior.
Most kids' sleep requirements fall within a predictable
range of hours based on their age, but each child is a
unique individual with distinct sleep needs.
Jennifer Shroff Pendley, PhD
http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/
tantrums.html#