Gifts for all the family - Viva Lewes

Christmas
in a basket
Deliciously
Different Hampers
from
Bill’s Produce Store
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See our
Christmas
newsletter
or ask in
store for more
information

vivaLEWES i s s u e t w e n t y - s e v e n d e c e m b e r 2 0 0 8
e d i t o r i a l
It starts earlier every year, they
say, and they probably always
have. Piped music in the shops,
lights in the streets, large pines
in the streets. Then another in
the house. Getting the presents
in good and early. Buying for
in laws, buying for exes, buying
for ex in-laws. Good intentions,
then a mad rush round the shops
on Christmas Eve. The frenzy
of wrapping. Round the telly
together: The Great Escape, if
you’re lucky. Christmas bloody
Eastenders. Stuck together for a
longer time than you’re used to
with relatives. Interesting booze.
Carol singers at the door, old acquaintances
turning up. Haven’t
seen you for ages! Must have
been last Christmas.
Then it arrives. The look of excitement
on the littl’uns faces
when they wake you up at 6am.
Doesn’t seem long ago that was
you. Terry’s Chocolate Oranges;
why’s there always a tangerine in
the stocking? The mess of paper
on the floor; the face you put on
to hide that you think it’s a duff
present. Turkey’s a bit bland.
Next year, it’s settled, we’ll get a
goose. Christmas crackers. Daft
jokes. Who’s the last at the table
to take off the paper hat? Christmas
pud, followed closely by excruciating
heartburn. Then it’s
everyone round the telly. Again.
It’s a Wonderful Life. Bing Crosby.
‘Actually,’ somebody says,
‘we’re statistically more likely
to get a white Easter.’ Which is
about when you hoover up the
last pine needle. Christmas is on
its way: here we go again. Enjoy
the month.
c o n t e n t s
7. My Lewes: Postman Mick Sains’s hands-on Christmas
8. Murder mystery: Has anyone seen Lord Lucan?
13. Christmas quiz: Have you lot been paying attention?
17. Literature: Katharine Whitehorn cooks us up a G&T
19. Cinema: Son of Rambow, surreal rites-of-passage at the All Saints
21. Art and About: Rooks fan Andrew Fitchett and much more
23. Diary dates: The best of the rest of what’s on in December
25. Carol services: ‘Tis the season to be jolly, after all
27. Gig guide: Hip hop, reggae and gypsy jazz
29. Food: A new lick of paint at the Lewes Arms... and a new menu, too
32. Bill Collison gets all festive with cranberries
35. The Nibbler. Foodie gossip from our spy in the Xmas kitchen
37. Boxing Day Hunt: Essence of fox hunt at the White Hart
39. Bricks and Mortar: Is it D-day for the ugliest building in town?
41. New Year’s Eve: Wig out at the Big Wig Ball
43. Late Night Shopping: Reclaim the streets, till you drop
45. Christmas shopping special. Who we bought what, where
59. Viva Villages: Our man in Iford wears the wrong shoes
61. Viva Kids: Rinky dink dink
65. Football: The Rooks are swooping low
67. Literary Lewes: Thomas Turner’s incredible 18th century diary
69. Local history: Why the Snowdrop’s called The Snowdrop
71. Norman Baker: Our local MP gets his Easter greetings in early
73. We try out... golf: Rob Read gets into the swing of it
83. Trade Secrets: Bill Bruce’s timing is spot on
98: Inside left: Railway Jack, the three-legged travelling dog
Yuletide cover designed by the ever-talented Mr Neil Gower.
Editor: Alex Leith alex@vivalewes.com Deputy Editor: Emma Chaplin emmachaplin@vivalewes.com Sub-editor: David Jarman
Designer: Katie Moorman katie@vivalewes.com
Advertising Manager: Steve Watts steve@vivalewes.com Publisher: Nick Williams nick@vivalewes.com.
Viva Lewes is based at Pipe Passage, 151b High Street, Lewes, BN7 1XU
For information about advertising or events you would like to see publicised, call 01273 488882 or e-mail info@vivalewes.com
Every care has been taken to ensure the accuracy of our content. The Viva Lewes Handbook cannot be held responsible for any omissions,
errors or alterations.
3

THIS MONTH’S COVER
VIVALEWES QUIZ
We have been offered some fantastic
prizes, worth over £300, to four winners
of our Christmas Quiz (page 13). Kilim
have donated a handmade Turkish stool
(£175) Bill’s have provided a big Christmas
hamper (£75), Artisan are offering a
meal for two to the value of £50 and Harveys
have chipped in with a bottle of Gosset
champagne worth £30. Thanks to all
those companies for their generosity.
Send your answers to our office (Xmas
Quiz competition, Viva Lewes, 151b High
St, Lewes BN71XU) or e-mail them to
competitions@vivalewes.com by draw date
December 12th,. The more questions you
get right, the more chance you have of
winning a prize. The Judges’ decision will
be final; usual competition rules apply.
SEASONAL VEG IN DECEMBER
The Christmas cover is always
quite a challenge. In
our first year, before Neil
Gower came on board, we
commissioned Amy Williams
to paint a portrait of
a turkey, looking atcha. Last
year we asked Neil to design
us up some Lewes wrapping
paper, and we created a
torn-off bit in the corner, to
make it look like the magazine
was a present which had
just come through your letterbox.
This time we’ve gone
for a more romantic view of
the festive season: a view up
early-morning Keere Street,
LEWES STREET NAMES #5
as the postman goes about
his rounds. Don’t forget
that, until December 17th,
Neil’s wonderful artwork
will be on display in Pelham
House: not just his previous
covers for Viva Lewes, but
also commissions he’s had
from the likes of Conde Nast
and Faber & Faber, too. You
can also buy replica A4-plus
prints of Neil’s previous Viva
Lewes covers on canvas, for
as little as £30 each. Neil has
a website, www.neilgower.
co.uk, which is well worth
checking out.
LS Davey, in his excellent book ‘The Street Names of Lewes’
dispels the myth that Fisher Street was so named because it
was the site of the market for the fish brought over by the
‘Juggs’ (fisherwomen) from Brighton in early medieval days.
It is much more likely to have been named after William
Fyssher, a local landowner in the 14th century – the name
was recorded in deeds as early as 1383.
Brussels sprouts; red, green, white and savoy cabbages; cauliflower; celeriac; celery; Jerusalem artichokes; leeks; parsn
Cook of the Farmers’ Market and to the producers who help her compile this list. There are two markets in Decemb
pick it up at the second.

COMPETITION
WIN a signed limited edition
Peter Messer print
worth £159.95
YOURS FOR A FIVER
If you’re looking for an unknockoverable,
triangular,
wooden, hand-painted Santa, we
know just the place. This one set
us back £2.99 from BB Designs
on Fisher Street, and there are
plenty more idiosyncratic decorations
to choose from, too.
Hyper-local Lewes artist Peter
Messer, famous for his slightly
offbeat tempera-on-gesso paintings
of central Lewes, has teamed
up with the internet gallery Fine
Art Company (based in Malling
Street) to produce a series of limited
edition prints, which retail at
£69.95 (or £159.95, when handsomely
presented in environmentally
friendly frames).
The Fine Art Company has generously
offered one framed copy
of this print to a lucky Viva Lewes
reader. All you have to do to stand
a chance of being that person, is
WHAT’S ON TONIGHT?
HEY, ISN’T THAT ME?
If you’re the chap in a hurry with the
cool shades and the long shadow on
Wednesday 19th November, come
into our offices to claim your £10 book
token, usable in any High Street bookshop,
including the one which forms
the erudite filling for a Viva Lewes office
sandwich in Pipe Passage. Give us
a ring beforehand on 488882 to let us
know you’re coming.
b i t s a n d b o b s
to answer the following question:
Which Lewes Bonfire Society’s
colours are black and gold? The
winning answer will be drawn
from all correct responses received
by 12th December. Please
send the answer to: Messer Comp,
151b High St, Lewes BN71XU or
to competitions@vivalewes.com.
Usual rules apply.
For more information about the
Peter Messer prints, or others by
a wide range of local and international
artists, check out www.fineartcompany.co.uk
or call 01273
897355.
Every week we produce a web
magazine letting you know what
events are happening in and
around Lewes. There’s plenty
more in it besides: old photos
of Lewes, issues and columns.
Check out www.vivalewes.com,
because the hills are alive, and we
know it.
ips; carrots; swede; shallots; onions; spinach; chard; kale; apples; pears; cobnuts and chestnuts. Thanks to Deb
er in the Cliffe Precinct: the first is on Dec 6th, the second on Dec 21st. You can order your bird at the first, and

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MYLEWES
Name: Mickey Sains.
Profession: Postman.
How long have you been a postman? For over twelve
years now.
Are you local? Yes, I was born and bred in Lewes and
have two daughters and two grandchildren. Because of
what I do, I have a mental map of Lewes, and know lots
of people’s names.
Which is your area? I’ve covered the Number 12, Winterbourne
‘walk’, for the past four years. We all have an
area to cover, but can choose our own route. I have about
470 houses on my walk, which includes Keere Street (I
go down, not up!), Rotten Row and Grange Road.
Tell me about your job? There are about 75 people
who work for the Royal Mail in Lewes, postmen and
ladies as well as drivers. It’s a very hands-on job. We start
work at 6am, segregating our own post into pigeonholes
at the sorting office, then we head off to deliver them,
finishing by 2pm. We work Monday to Saturday with
one day off in rotation. I’m 55 now and it definitely
keeps me fit.
Which is your favourite street? I like Keere Street because
it doesn’t take long to deliver to those houses.
Least favourite? If there was somewhere I could choose
not to deliver to it would be St Pancras Gardens flats.
There’s nothing wrong with the people, they are very
nice, it’s just the number of steps you have to climb!
Ever been bitten by a dog? A couple of times. The
weather can be the most difficult part of our job, especially
the wind and heavy rain. Lewes letterboxes can
be tricky too – some are low down, some go upwards
instead of across, and some are tiny.
What do you think about the closure of so many
local post offices? It’s a crying shame, especially for
Photograph: Katie Moorman
pensioners. I hated seeing it happen.
What’s the Christmas period like? We have a lot
more cards and parcels, which means more time sorting
and delivering. We need to use a trolley for deliveries
rather than a bag. At work, we always give each other
Christmas cards and have a mini party with mince pies.
What do you like about Lewes? I like most things
about it. I enjoy living and working here, and meeting
a lot of people.
What do you dislike about it? Perhaps I’m old-fashioned
but I don’t like the way the supermarkets have
taken business from small shops. But my wife Jill likes
Tesco so we go there anyway.
What’s your favourite view? I like looking over Lewes
from the golf course.
What’s your local? The Tally-ho.
What’s your poison? Guinness.
Which paper do you read? The local and the Sun.
What did you have for breakfast? I don’t have time
for breakfast. We take turns buying each other coffee
from the machine at the sorting office, then I’ll meet the
wife or my daughter after work and we often go to the
Bus Station Café for dinner.
How would you spend a perfect Sunday afternoon?
I’m Match Secretary of Spring Barn Angling
Club and a member of Lewes Angling Club, and I
often have fishing competitions Sunday mornings.
The biggest fish I’ve ever caught was a 19lb common
carp. We throw them all back, they are far too muddy
to eat anyway, and I only like sea fish. Anyway, after
fishing, I like a good Sunday dinner with the wife.
Can you recommend a good film? Titanic and Zulu.
And somewhere to eat? The John Harvey Tavern do
great ham, egg and chips. V Emma Chaplin
7

NEWHAVEN PEER
Does our local ferry port hold the key to solving the Lord Lucan mystery?
One way of getting rid of a freshly murdered
corpse in the sixties and seventies was, apparently,
to drive it out to the West Quay in
Newhaven in the dead of night. The body
would be taken out to sea in a fishing boat,
by a skipper well versed in the grisly art of
dropping it overboard, weighed down in such
a manner that it would never reappear.
This is, it’s been said, how the Krays disposed
of the body of ‘Mad Axeman’ Frank Mitchell.
And this is very likely why there’s a very local
bent to the enduring Lord Lucan mystery.
The last place anyone has ever admitted to seeing
Lucan was in Uckfield, about four hours
after the murder of his children’s nanny in the
basement of his former home in London, and
the attempted murder of his wife. He left the
house of his good friend Susan Maxwell-Scott
at around 1am, on Friday 9th November,
1974, in a borrowed Ford Corsair.
It is logical to assume that the half-crazed Lucan,
with the blood of two women spattered
on his clothes, subsequently drove through
Lewes. Then past Iford, Rodmell and Piddinghoe,
and finally to Newhaven, where he
parked his car in Norman Road. And disappeared.
For good.
The car was found there by police three days
later, with bloodstains on the interior, and a
near replica of the murder weapon he’d left
on the scene – a length of lead piping – in
the boot.
Of the many books written about the case, it
is that of Kingston-based John Pearson – The
Gamblers – that posits the most plausible answer
to the mystery that continues to intrigue
the world.
Thursday, the night of the murder, was meant
to be nanny Sandra Rivett’s night off. Lucan’s
plan was simple: he knew that his wife was in
the habit of making a cup of tea in the kitchen
basement of her Belgravia house at around
nine in the evening.
It had been their family home until their splitup
a year earlier, and Lucan still had a key. He
would let himself in shortly before nine, take
out the light bulb to help conceal himself, and
kill her when she appeared.
His idea was to carry her body, in a US Mail
sack, to his borrowed car, then go to the Clermont
Club to enjoy an alibi-ensuring dinner
with friends. Afterwards to drive down
to Newhaven, haul her body onto the fishing
boat, and dump it in the Channel, never to
emerge again.
His motive is also clear. He had earlier in the
year lost a court case over who was to have custody
of the couple’s three children. If his wife
disappeared, the police would assume she had
done so of her own volition, given that she had
a history of mental problems. It would be days
before an investigation were launched. If he
left no trace of the murder in the basement,
the police would have no call to perform forensic
checks in the room. He would then gain
custody of the children.
Unfortunately for him, that week the nanny
changed her night off. It was Sandra Rivett
who went down to make the 9pm cup of tea.
In the dark he mistook her for his wife and
bludgeoned her to death. Then, when his wife
came down to see what was taking her so long,
he attacked her too. Unable to bring himself to
complete the murder, he helped her upstairs,
where he was seen by his 10-year-old daughter,
Frances. When he went to the bathroom
to fetch a cloth to wipe her head wounds, Lady
Lucan escaped from the house, and raised the
alarm in a nearby pub. He fled the house before
the police arrived.
We know that he subsequently went to another
private residence in the neighbourhood
– not his own – from where he made a couple
of phone calls. Then he drove to Uckfield,

and spent two hours with Susan Maxwell-
Scott, who gave him a scotch and water,
and listened to his implausible account
of what had happened, which he called ‘a
night of terrible coincidences’.
So why did he then continue his journey
to Newhaven, even without the body in
the boot of the car? Again, there’s a simple
explanation. Presumably the fisherman
in charge of the body-disposal operation
would still be waiting for him, unaware of
the fact that he had bungled the murder.
And presumably this character could be
persuaded, instead of dumping the body
of Lady Lucan, to take her husband away
in his boat.
After that, it’s anyone’s guess what happened.
Some suggest Lucan ‘did the honourable
thing’, killed himself, and it was
his body that ended up weighted down to
the bottom of the sea. Others have it that,
making good use of his influential contacts
(the ‘Clermont Set’ he belonged to included
the likes of John Aspinall and Jimmy
Goldsmith) he was whisked away to a safe
house somewhere in Europe. Many theorise
that he was subsequently spirited off to
a different continent, with a new identity.
Pearson believes in Susan Maxwell-Scott’s
theory, shared by her (also late) husband
Ian: Lucan became a liability to those who
had rescued him, and was executed and
buried, possibly in Switzerland.
Whatever the case, there is almost certainly
somebody other than Susan Maxwell-Scott
who saw and talked to Lord
Lucan in the small hours of the night of
the murder. And perhaps that person is
still walking around the streets of Newhaven
today. V

There are over £300-worth of prizes up for grabs for four lucky winners of our
Lewes quiz: see page 4 for details. All answers are in 2008 editions of Viva Lewes
1. Boozer: Which Lewes pub has a colony of
white doves that hang out on the roof?
2. Villages: In which nearby village can you
find Shelley’s Folly and Conyboro House?
3. Literature: Who, at the age of four, wrote
‘The Life of Father McSwiney’?
4. Art: Which local artist painted the portrait of
Tom Paine underneath the Market Tower?
5. Architecture: Rubble from which building
was used to build the spectator banks of the
Dripping Pan?
6. Sport: Against which Sussex club did Lewes
FC play their historic first home game in the
Conference National in August?
7. Music: What is the name of the locally based
Bob Dylan tribute band?
8. Music: What was the name of the operetta
Lewes Operatic Society performed a world
première of in September?
9. Literature: Which fictional character intended
to add to his collection at the sweet
counter in the Lewes Woolworth’s?
10. Music: Which Vivaldi-influenced Baroque
chamber quartet are fronted by recorder-playing
Lewesian Piers Adams?
11. Villages: In which East Sussex village
would you find ‘Rope Walk’, once known as
‘Shithouse Lane’?
12. Literature: Which Sussex seaside resort did
Douglas Percy Bliss, honeymooning in Lewes,
describe as a ‘triple-promenaded Sodom?’
13. Food: Which village off the C7 hosts a
chilli nursery? (more overleaf)
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M

KEVIN.MURPHY
mop ®
154 High Street
Lewes
East Sussex
BN7 1XU
Tel: 01273 487788
Large Format Printing
Laminating
Banners
Vinyl Lettering
Mounting
Digital Wallpaper
Interior Graphics
Signage
Window Graphics
Exhibition Panels
Tel: +44 (0)1273 488 339
email: +info@inkmill.co.uk
H A I R D R E S S I N G
im
inkmill.co.uk

14. Villages: In which local village can you find
Ashurst Organics?
15. Food: In which Lewes restaurant can you enjoy
Zuppa Mamma Mia?
16. Bonfire: What is the name of Commercial
Square’s annual brass-band-and-fireworks fundraising
event?
17. Villages: What is the name of Ringmer’s historic
tortoise?
18. Literature: Which literary figure did a Mrs
Hawkesford complain to about the lack of tennis parties
in Lewes?
19. Issues: Which fictional hackette has lent her
name to a local pressure group?
20. Villages: In which nearby village has a nursery
been growing orchids since 1879?
21. Art: What was the collective nickname of the artloving
Lewes-based sisters Frances Byng-Stamper
and Caroline Lucas?
1 5
22. Architecture: Which Lewes building was constructed
in 1805 with voluntary contributions from
the Citizens of Zion?
23. Villages: In which parish were the remains of a
Roman Villa recently discovered?
24. Dance: What is the name of the Lewes-based
female Morris team?
25. Architecture: What is the name of the massive
bell housed in the Market Tower?
26. People: Which local author rocked the world of
journalism earlier this year with his book Flat Earth
News?
27. Architecture: In which year was the Pells Pool
opened?
28. Literature: Which WW1 poet spent the first two
nights of the war in Lewes?
29. Villages: What is the name of the river that runs
through Glynde?
30. History: Where the Town Hall now stands, there
used to be a famous old inn. What was its name? V
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M

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KATHARINE WHITEHORN
Emma Chaplin explores a veteran journalist’s selective memories
I knock a little nervously at the door of the north London home of
Katharine Whitehorn. I have come to discuss her forthcoming visit to
Lewes’ Monday Literary Club, talking about her autobiography, Selective
Memory. She greets me with her distinctly deep voice, and as I follow her
into the living room, I admire her elegant outfit. Appropriate, as she was
once Fashion Editor of the Observer (on a mission ‘to get women out of
dreary cardigans’). The current photograph of her in the autobiography
does not, I suggest, do her justice. She laughs: “There’s a lot to be said
for a photograph that looks worse than you do.” Still writing at 80, she
has always had a sharp and delicious wit. Domestic inadequates like me
relish lines like: ‘Have you ever taken something out of the clothes basket
because it had become, relatively, the cleanest thing?’ As she lights a fire
and pours coffee, I ask about her experiences as a Roedean pupil, evacuated
to Cumberland in the war. “I regard it as a dark chapter. The ethos
back then was atrocious. Snobbish and games-mad. I’d have never lived
it down on Fleet Street if I hadn’t run away.” Writer of the entertainingly
practical book, Cooking in a Bedsitter, published in 1963 and still in print,
Katharine was an Observer columnist for forty years, and is now Saga
Magazine’s Agony Aunt. A groundbreaking journalist, her funny, insightful
columns exploded claustrophobic notions of ‘women’s interest’ stories.
She describes her columns as: ‘Light but not, on the whole, lightweight’.
One that caused a furor challenged the inherent sexism in banks. I ask her
about it. “In the late 1960s a woman could still not get a mortgage without
a male guarantor. I think young women now have no idea how much they
take for granted.” How does she like being an Agony Aunt? “I think it’s
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
common sense. I get a lot of letters
from Saga-age women who
worry about the odd behaviour of
their husband after retirement. I
tell them ‘chaps feel awful when
they no longer have the persona of
a male at work - it’s not to do with
you.’” Katharine’s own husband,
crime writer Gavin Lyall, died
in 2003. They had been married
45 years and clearly adored each
other. In her autobiography, she
says about widowhood: ‘You have
to learn to live in another country
in which you’re an unwilling
refugee.’ They have two sons. We
discuss how couples today tend to
give priority to the needs of their
children over keeping their marriage
intact, and she shows me a
passage from her 1972 book, How
to Survive Children where it says:
‘There are few things that you can
think up that will hurt your children
as much as a serious rift between
the two of you; don’t make
a human sacrifice to the great God
child, who won’t be there forever.’
At this point, her door bells rings.
Someone has turned up unexpectedly
for an interview. Katharine’s
pragmatic response is to pour us
all vast G&Ts. As I return to Lewes
by train, I read in her book the
words: ‘a journalist does, first and
last, cross the path of a good many
outstanding people.’ And I feel that
that’s just happened to me.
L i t E R a t U R E
V
Katharine will be the guest speaker
for the Monday Literary Club at 8pm
on the 15th December, in Pelham
House (478512).
1 7

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PARTERRE
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glass
pottery
clocks
silk flowers
trugs
ceramics
wood
mirrors
gloves
original art & pottery
silk flower arrangements
made to order & ready made
170, High Street, Lewes
www.parterredesign.co.uk
01273 476305 next to the castle
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SON OF RAMBOW
Dexter Lee enjoys a film within a film
Will has to leave his secondary school
classroom because his geography teacher
is putting on an educational video, and,
being from a Plymouth Brethren family,
he’s not allowed to watch it. Tearaway
Lee, who lives in a care home, under
the disruptive wing of his bullying elder
brother, is thrown out of his lesson for
more conventional reasons. These two
dysfunctional ten year olds meet in the
corridor, and, via a number of increasingly
surreal hurdles, an unlikely friendship
is forged.
Son of Rambow is a peculiar film, and a
peculiar choice for the Lewes Film Club,
which has always liked to mix the odd recent
offbeat hit in with old classics, and
art-house and world movies.
Director Garth Jennings was previously
most famous for his rendition of A Hitchhiker’s
Guide to the Galaxy, and cut his
teeth making adverts and pop videos.
His latest (2007) movie is highly unconventional,
and at times, rather excruciatingly
flawed. But a pair of strong central
performances (from Will Poulter and Bill
Milner), and the fact that Son of Ram-
bow’s heart is firmly in the right place,
saves the day.
The two lads’ friendship thrives when
they embark on making a film for a
Screen Test competition – we are in the
early eighties. But when the coolest kids
in school get involved – led by a French
punk exchange student – a conflict brews
between them.
Cue lots of bizarre
situations, in a rather
beautiful semi-rural
setting. Cue a good
deal of meta-cinema,
as the kids create their
film within a film. And
cue a sentimental,
feelgood ending. For
a while, you keep asking
yourself ‘why am I
watching this?’ By the
credits, tears in your
eyes, you feel rather
fond of the whole affair.
8pm, Friday 12th, All
Saints
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
C i n E M a
1 9

art &ABOUT
Focus on… Rooks, by Andrew Fitchett
Name of painting? Rooks.
How long did it take to paint? About two days.
What materials did you use? Oil on canvas
board.
How much is it going for? £380
Any direct influences? No. I’d feel like a fraud
if I knowingly took inspiration from other painters
but literature does sneak in.
What would your detractors say about it? It’s
shite. It doesn’t go with my curtains.
And how about your fans? It’s like a memory I
haven’t quite had.
What are the most common themes and subjects
in your work? Moments of solitude, the everyday
and commonplace, journeys, rooks and crows.
What do you think that says about you? I’m a country boy at heart.
What do you wear to paint? Camouflage cap, shirt, jeans and occasionally a decorator’s apron.
What are some titles of your other paintings? Nine Rooks, Winged shadow, Curiosity, Rookery, Strange
Fruit, The Barn.
Who would you most like to paint a portrait of you? Otto Dix.
What do you think of the Turner prize? It gives me a strange mixture of amusement and depression.
What’s your favourite art gallery? The Ondaatje Wing of The National Portrait Gallery.
If you had to hang one painting from your desert island tree, what would it be? The Beheading of Saint
John the Baptist by Caravaggio, because it is big enough to make into a tent; image on the inside of course.
An exhibition of Andrew Fitchett’s work will be displayed in the bar area of Pelham House from Dec 20th to Feb 17th.
The Hop Gallery, formerly the Star on Castle Ditch Lane, is following
on the tradition of putting on an arts and crafts show in the old brewery
in the run-up to Christmas. All artists will be local and regional, prices
won’t put you too much out of pocket.
Another place to buy affordable artworks for Christmas is the Chalk
Gallery, on North Street. This is a collective of 21 local artists who
all help to fund and run the gallery they exhibit in. The walls are full
of an ever-changing array of artworks, and there are more inexpensive
unframed works on sale too.
Every month the Chalk Gallery chooses a featured artist whose work is
given more prominence than the others. This month, from Nov 30th
to December 24th, the artist in question is Krysia Drury, who produces
figurative monotypes usually featuring animals in a Downsland setting.
Drury is inspired by the Post-Impressionists and German Expressionists,
but also cites Samuel Palmer as a major influence. The work pictured
is entitled Seven Sisters, Two Sisters.
V
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
a R t
2 1

art &ABOUT
Focus on… Rooks, by Andrew Fitchett
Name of painting? Rooks.
How long did it take to paint? About two days.
What materials did you use? Oil on canvas
board.
How much is it going for? £380
Any direct influences? No. I’d feel like a fraud
if I knowingly took inspiration from other painters
but literature does sneak in.
What would your detractors say about it? It’s
shite. It doesn’t go with my curtains.
And how about your fans? It’s like a memory I
haven’t quite had.
What are the most common themes and subjects
in your work? Moments of solitude, the everyday
and commonplace, journeys, rooks and crows.
What do you think that says about you? I’m a country boy at heart.
What do you wear to paint? Camouflage cap, shirt, jeans and occasionally a decorator’s apron.
What are some titles of your other paintings? Nine Rooks, Winged shadow, Curiosity, Rookery, Strange
Fruit, The Barn.
Who would you most like to paint a portrait of you? Otto Dix.
What do you think of the Turner prize? It gives me a strange mixture of amusement and depression.
What’s your favourite art gallery? The Ondaatje Wing of The National Portrait Gallery.
If you had to hang one painting from your desert island tree, what would it be? The Beheading of Saint
John the Baptist by Caravaggio, because it is big enough to make into a tent; image on the inside of course.
An exhibition of Andrew Fitchett’s work will be displayed in the bar area of Pelham House from Dec 20th to Feb 17th.
The Hop Gallery, formerly the Star on Castle Ditch Lane, is following
on the tradition of putting on an arts and crafts show in the old brewery
in the run-up to Christmas. All artists will be local and regional, prices
won’t put you too much out of pocket.
Another place to buy affordable artworks for Christmas is the Chalk
Gallery, on North Street. This is a collective of 21 local artists who
all help to fund and run the gallery they exhibit in. The walls are full
of an ever-changing array of artworks, and there are more inexpensive
unframed works on sale too.
Every month the Chalk Gallery chooses a featured artist whose work is
given more prominence than the others. This month, from Nov 30th
to December 24th, the artist in question is Krysia Drury, who produces
figurative monotypes usually featuring animals in a Downsland setting.
Drury is inspired by the Post-Impressionists and German Expressionists,
but also cites Samuel Palmer as a major influence. The work pictured
is entitled Seven Sisters, Two Sisters.
V
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
a R t
2 1

diary DATES
PICK OF THE MONTH - Sun 14th, The Incredibles
The second event hosted by The Magic Lantern, a group
dedicated to introducing children to the wonderful world of
cinema. An ML session mixes live drama with a screening of
a favourite movie: the movement started in Switzerland and is
spreading round the world. This month’s offering is the wonderful
Pixar classic, featuring the eponymous hero, a superhero
in a cynical post-superhero world, fighting crime with the help
of Elastigirl, Dash and Violet.
All Saints, 11am-12.45pm, £5 one-off taster.
774 770 for more details
HIGHLIGHTS
Tue 2nd: Cinema – Animal Farm
Halas and Batchelor’s stunning full-length animation of George Orwell’s classic novel, introduced by their
daughter, Vivien Halas, who runs their estate from Southerham. Lewes Film Club, All Saints, 8pm, £5
Wed 3rd: Magic Lantern Christmas Show
Plus mulled wine, mince pies and a grand raffle. Anne of Cleves House, 7.30pm, £5
Weekend starting Fri 5th: Cinema - Quantum of Solace
Lewes Cinema screen the latest (22nd) Bond movie. It’s full of action, but bereft of gadgets. Critics panned
it, the public seems to love it. All Saints, times tba in www.vivalewes.com
Sat 6th and 21st: Lewes Farmers’ Market
In December there are two markets, so you can order your bird at the first, and pick it up at the second.
There’s plenty more seasonal fare, too. Cliffe Precinct, 9am, free
Thur 11th: Conversations lunch
Over a two-course meal OperaLite’s Carol Kelly, a repetiteur and wife of international tenor Paul Austin
Kelly, talks about the trials and tribulations of being an opera singer. Shelley’s Hotel, 12.45pm, £16
Thur 11th: Needlewriters reading
Three local writers read from recent publications: Susannah Waters, Clare Best and Irving Weinman.
Needlemakers Cafe, 7pm for 7.45pm, £5/3 from Sky-Lark (Needlemakers) or on door
Mon 22nd: Christmas in the Parlour
Pippa and Karl from Operaplayhouse, both professional singers, present ‘a festive programme of readings,
songs and sing-along carols. Bill’s, 7.30pm, £28 with Xmas meal
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
2 3

Restaurant

Saturday6 th December,9amto1pm.
Sussex Down’s College NVQ students will be
showcasing their handmade products made
from ingredients sourced from wild Sussex,as
wellascookingatthemarket.
Sunday21 st December,9amto1pm.
A festive Christmas Market featuring very
seasonallocalproduce:turkey(preorderonthe
6th), veg, fruit, cheese, preserves, wine, beer,
and Christmas puds, all reared, grown and
made locally with love! Also featuring artists
fromtheStarGallery.
ContactDebCookon01273470900
lewesfarmersmarket@commoncause.org.uk
CHRISTMAS CONCERTS
Sing your hearts out for the Lord
C a R o L s
Wed 3rd December
Pestalozzi Carol Concert, St Michael’s Church,
7.30pm, £6
Sun 7th December
Family Carols, South Malling Church, 10am
Carol Concert with the Ashdown Singers, St Pancras,
Irelands Lane, 3pm
Christingle Service for children, St John’s Church,
Southover 4pm
Christmas service for under 5s and carers, Eastgate
Baptist Church 4pm
Mon 8th December
Carol Concert, East Sussex Bach Choir, St Anne’s,
7pm (League of Friends of Victoria Hospital) £10/£5
Wed 10th Dec
Brighton Orpheus Choir, St John’s Church, Southover
7.30pm t: 474079
Sun 14th December
Family Nativity Service, Eastgate Baptist Church.
10.30am
Carol Singing on Nevill Green, with Glynde & Beddingham
Brass Band. Christchurch, 3pm
Tues 16th December
Singing Round the Parish, St Thomas a Becket,
Cliffe. Meet at the
church at 7pm
Sun 21st December
Nativity, St John’s Southover 10.30am
Carol Service, Christchurch, Prince Edward’s Rd
10.30am
Carol Service, St John’s sub Castro 3pm
Children’s Nativity, St Pancras 3pm
Carol Concert with full choir and violas, Westgate
Chapel, 6pm
Carol Services at: Eastgate Baptist, St Anne’s, St
John’s & Southover 6.30pm
Carols by Candlelight, South Malling, Church Lane,
6.30pm
V

gigGUIDE W i t h g R a h a M d E n M a n ( g i g s @ V i V a L E W E s . C o M )
PICK OF THE MONTH
HIGHLIGHTS
David Celia
‘Roots-rock with hints of folk, wrapped up in a pop package’, all the way from Toronto.
Three and four-part harmonies, with intelligent street-wise lyrics. David Celia is embarking
on his 13th annual European tour and as he did last year, rather remarkably, he’s taking
in the Pelham Arms. Radio 2’s Bob Harris is a big fan: he’s recently opened for the likes of
the Divine Comedy, Fairport Convention, Elvis Costello and Badly Drawn Boy. Check out
his idiosyncratic sound on www.davidcelia.com.
Pelham Arms, 8pm, free
Tue 2nd: Helen Glavin and Dirk Campbell. Classy Celtic/jazz/world music. Pelham House, 7.30pm, £10/8
Thur 4th: Folk. Open Night upstairs at the Royal Oak to celebrate Late Night Shopping. 8pm, free
Fri 5th: Nil by Mouth. Energetic covers from Bon Jovi to the Kaiser Chiefs. Con Club, 8pm, £3 non-members
Fri 5th: The Varlies. Rock, funk… and tango from Tunbridge Wells. John Harvey Tavern, 8pm, free
Fri 5th: Mr Finn. ‘Religious, glam, German pop’. Brighton-based hip-hop. Lansdown, 8pm, free
Sat 6th: Roland Chadwick. Amazing ‘guitarist’s guitar’ from the hirsute Aussie. Lansdown, 8pm, free
Thur 11th: Pepper’s Ghost Christmas Show. Magic Lantern Victoriana, and folk. Royal Oak, 8pm, £5
Thur 11th: Nuri Koseoglu and Ben Strelley-Jones. Gypsy jazz with fiddle and guitar. Pelham Arms, 8pm, free
Fri 12th: Ital and Vital. Reggae tunes and ting with Ras Ric. Lansdown, 8pm, free
Sat 13th: Dani Wilde. Soulful blues singer and guitarist, supported by Sonny Black. All Saints, 8pm, £8/£10
Sun 14th: Nikolas Barrel. Singer/songwriter of GinClub fame. Blackboys Inn, 2.15, fiver in the hat
Thur 18th: Folk Club Christmas Party Night. Annual song and dance bash. Royal Oak, 8pm, free
Fri 19th: Zen House. Punky covers featuring ex Lambretta Doug Saunders. Con Club, 8pm, £3 non-members
Fri 19th: DJ Joolsy P’s Britpop Experience. Says it on the tin: Oasis, Blur, Jam. Lansdown, 8pm, free
Wed 24th: Phil Light. Christmas Eve with solo covers merchant. John Harvey Tavern, 8pm, free
Sat 27th. Alter Ego. Female-fronted covers band from the 60s to today. John Harvey Tavern, 8pm, free
Wed 31st. Firebird. Rock and pop from 1970 to see the new year in. John Harvey Tavern, 8pm-1am, £5 in advance
Wed 31st: Hot Club of Belleville. ‘Speakeasy’ night of hot swing. Pelham Arms, 8pm, £10 in advance
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
2 7

THE LEWES ARMS
New landlords, a new lick of paint... and a new menu, too
The Lewes Arms, after the Greene King years, is now
owned by Fuller’s, but the sign above one of the windows
still proclaims it as ‘Formerly a Beard’s House’.
This seems particularly apt during a recent Viva visit,
since some Easy Rider facial hair is being cultivated
by members of staff taking part in the ‘Movember’
moustache-growing Prostate Cancer research fundraising
drive. Anyway, we arrive at the newly managed
and freshly painted Lewes Arms just before the
lunchtime rush, walking past the daily specials menu
on the way in. We sit ourselves near the lovely fire in
the nicest ‘family’ room that I know. I see cream and
brown walls and new red curtains hanging at the window,
and no sign of the old nicotine stains. Some have
mentioned to me that they feel bereft at the changes,
but I rather like it clean and bright. It seems as if it’s
managing to forge ahead after a troubled period. A
flyer on the table offers a shot of Malt of the Month
(Glenmorangie) for £1.45. Controversially, music is
now piped into the family room, something salsa-y
whilst we are there. Not to my taste, but no-one else
even notices, until I mention it. As well as the Fuller’s
range, Harveys remains on tap. We all choose food
from the list of specials. I go for sundried tomato,
broad bean and black olive frittata and salad at £5.95,
Beardy companion No 1 for chicken, leek and ham
pie with chips at £6.95, and BC2, smoked chowder
and baguette at £5.50. The conversation turns to facial
itching, stubble and whether the fierce ban on
the use of mobile phones in the Arms still operates (it
doesn’t, but I didn’t hear anyone in there use one), until
our food arrives. On a grey autumn day, my frittata
looks vibrant and beautiful. Lovely rich yellow of the
egg speckled with the black olives, bright green broad
beans and red tomato. An elegant heap of grated carrot
and courgette salad adds more colour, with the
rest of the plate being taken up by bacon and butterbeans
on crisp lettuce. Very visually appealing and it
tastes lovely too, the honey and orange vinaigrette
packing a powerful, garlicky punch. The only thing I
don’t like are the raisins in the carrot/courgette mixture.
A discussion about the desirability or otherwise
of broad beans ensues, because as a child, I thought
they were the Devils’ work and I’m still suspicious,
especially of the bigger ones. “A much misunderstood
vegetable,” BC1 declares. “Much like the sprout.” His
pie comes with very good, crisp chips, peas and gravy,
and features large, juicy chunks of chicken and ham
under an excellent crust. BC1 looks delighted and
tells us how much he loathes pub pies which are really
stew with a separately cooked pastry lid. “This,”
he says emphatically “is a proper pie”. We heartily
agree, whilst trying to sneak some of his chips.
BC2’s chowder is a fine bowlful of smoked haddock,
prawns, chunks of potato, parsley and cream. He too,
is a happy man. “I hate it when chowder is gruelly
slop.” We take a look at their Christmas Menu, which
offers an impressive array of my favourite bits, the
side dishes, which sound utterly delicious. The Lewes
Arms seems to be back with a bang as a splendid place
to eat, drink or throw peas. V Emma Chaplin
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
F o o d R E V i E W
Photographs: Katie Moorman
2 9

ElEgant tarts
ClassiC Croissants &
traditional frEnCh brEad
high quality
frEnCh patissEriE
wedding cakes and
celebration tarts to order
5 station st, lEwEs
telephone: 01273 483211
open Tue-fri 7am-6pm Sat 9am-6pm Sun 9am-12pm

M A NOR
15% DISCOUNT
on A La Carte Menu (tues - fri)
please bring this ad with you
LUNCH 2 courses (Mon - Sat) £11.00
DINNER 2 courses (Mon - Fri) £15.00
A LA CARTE I BAR MENU I SUNDAY ROASTS
DINNER, BED & BREAKFAST
£145 per couple per night
Edburton, Nr Henfield, West Sussex BN5 9LJ
T: 01903 815757
E: tottingtonmanor1@aol.com
W: www.tottingtonmanor.co.uk
NOW
OPEN
MONDAYS
3 1

Photograph: Toby Smedley at Hudoq.com
CRANBERRY CRUSH
Christmas dinner just wouldn’t be the same without a ruby-red dish of cranberry
relish, says Bill Collison
I grew up in a house where it was normal to have
evaporated milk and four sugars in a cup of tea and
tinned fruit salad and tinned cream for pudding. Imagine
that! Nowadays, what with being all middle
class and what have you, I sip my fresh mint tea (no
sugar) and eating fruit out of a tin would feel like
having a fag round the back of the bike shed.
It’s amazing how what we eat has changed and how
we Brits have absorbed so many other cuisines and
produce into our daily diets: lasagne last night, Thai
this evening, couscous tomorrow.
When I was a kid we didn’t have cranberries. None
of us did. But no Christmas table is complete these
days without a dish of ruby-red cranberry relish
ready to pile onto plates.
Grown mostly in America, cranberries have long
been an essential part of the Thanksgiving Dinner,
along with other dishes made from foods native to
the New World. But it’s really only since the mid-
1990s that cranberries have been popular here, and
that’s mostly down to Delia Smith who used them
in a dish on her television programme and they discovered
overnight fame, with supermarkets falling
over each other to stock enough for the marauding
hoards of cooks.
Nowadays, cranberries are up there with parsnips,
sprouts and chestnuts as must-haves for the Christmas
dinner, but it doesn’t stop there as they can be
added to all sorts of dishes – sweet and savoury – to
brighten up winter days with their tart, sweet, fruity
flavour and magenta colour.
Turkey and cranberry in a sandwich has got to be
one of the best combinations. In the café we sometimes
do a hot sausage, bacon, turkey and cranberry
sandwich. I know, it’s a bit of a meat overload, but it
sells like hot, er, sandwiches because it really hits the
spot and it’s the cranberries that give it that zing.
On the relish front, don’t overcook them. Once
they’re popping, keep an eye so that some cranber-
ries stay whole and add what you like – start with a
splash of orange or apple juice, add orange or lemon
zest, cloves, a tiny piece of star anise and sugar
to taste.
Chocolate and cranberry yule log recipe from
chef Andy Pellegrino
Sponge:
3 eggs
3oz castor sugar
2oz self-raising flour
1oz cocoa
Whisk eggs and sugar together until thick and
creamy. Fold sieved flour and cocoa through until
the mixture is light. Pour into a lined 30 x 20cm
baking tray. Bake for 8 – 10 mins at gas mark 4 until
firm and springy. Turn out on to a tea towel, remove
the lining paper and roll tightly. Leave till cool.
Filling:
250gtub mascarpone
6 tbsps Nutella
One cup cranberries
Scant tbsp sugar
Mix the mascarpone and Nutella together in a bowl.
With no added liquid, gently heat the cranberries
through in a pan with the sugar until the consistency
is jam-like. Set aside to cool.
Ganache:
125 ml whipping cream
200g chocolate buttons
Icing sugar
Heat the cream in a pan until it’s just about to boil.
Take off the heat and stir in the chocolate buttons.
Leave to cool till it’s the consistency of soft butter.
When everything has cooled, gently unroll the
sponge and spread, edge to edge, with the mascarpone
mix and then the cranberries. Roll up. Spread
the semi-set ganache over the sponge and use a fork
to create a log effect. Dust with icing sugar and finish
with a sprig of holly. Ta da! V
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
b i L L C o L L i s o n
3 3

FESTIVE FOOD VENUES

W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
THE NIBBLER
Your local foodie grapevine
There’s nothing like the spicy, alcoholic waft from
steaming Christmas puddings to put you in a festive
mood. May’s and Harveys stock great ingredients,
and with one item, it seems you get spiritual sustenance
too. Traditionally, the mash tun of Harvey’s
Christmas Ale gets blessed by clergy! If eight hours
of (pudding related) steaminess in your house is a
bit much, you can buy ready-made puddings and a
host of other good things at the Christmas Farmers’
Market, held on 21 Dec. Order turkeys in advance
– details of both Ersham and Holmansbridge Farms
at: www.commoncause.org.uk/farmersmarket. To
encourage people to keep Christmas local, Transition
Town Lewes’ food group are producing a leaflet
listing local suppliers. The Nibbler is keeping an
eye out for examples of extra value for your Lewes
Pound, and a pub is leading the way. The Elephant
and Castle are selling half a dozen free-range eggs
for £1.20, or just one Lewes Pound. Beckworth’s
have just started selling cups of fresh, Fairtrade coffee
to take away and have also introduced a sensible
new sandwich system. Another new coffee outlet
in the Cliffe, Moorey’s, should benefit, with all the
other beleaguered traders, from the fact that road
works have gone until the New Year. Hopefully foot
traffic will return in full force. Whilst down there,
take a look at Christmas Hampers both at Bill’s and
the Real Eating Co. And one place the Nibbler has
yet to try, but hears good things about, is the Buttercup
Café in Pastorale Antiques. Expect a review
soon. Happy festive nibbling!
Thenibbler@vivalewes.com
F o o d
3 5

BOXING DAY HUNT
A far cry from Siegfried Sassoon and ‘Soapy’ Sponge
The colourful spectacle of the Boxing Day Hunt
has always been one of the highlights of the traditional
Lewes calendar. Four years after the passing
of the Hunting with Dogs Act, members of
the Southdown and Eridge Hunt, the result of the
amalgamation of the two hunts twenty-eight years
ago, still congregate in all their finery outside The
White Hart. But what form does the hunt actually
take these days, once the stirrup-cups are drained,
the clatter of the horses and hounds fades from
the High Street and open country is attained?
As my ignorance on these matters is profound, I
throw myself on the mercy of Mr Colin Evans of
the Southdown and Eridge Hunt who has forty
years of hunting experience behind him. He explains
that under the provisions of the Hunting
with Dogs Act there are several ways in which it
is still possible to hunt whilst keeping within the
law and without endangering the safety of foxes.
I mention drag hunting but apparently there are
relatively few drag packs. Far more popular is trail
hunting, and it is this variety that the Southdown
and Eridge favours. The principle remains the
same - in both cases a predetermined trail is laid
for the hounds to follow (containing ‘essence of
fox’ as Mr Evans rather charmingly characterises
it). The difference, as I understand it, is that the
drag hunting follows a trail that aims to take in as
many high hedges and large obstacles as possible,
the primary objective being to have the horses and
hounds flying across open country at high speed.
Trail hunting, by contrast, aims to follow a trail
that simulates as closely as possible the course that
might have been taken by a fox in a traditional
day’s hunting. Thus it might take in, for example,
woodland, river crossings or bramble bushes.
Speed is not considered of the essence.
And what if the dogs inadvertently stumble across
the scent of a real fox? How does the hunt remain
within the law? The answer is simple – the hounds
are brought back to the trail. Mr Evans concedes
that this is not always easy –‘like turning round
the Queen Mary’- but insists that it is done. After
all, he points out, even before the legislation was
introduced hounds would have been turned round
if they were heading for lambing ewes.
Apart from the Boxing Day Hunt, Mr Evans estimates
that the hunt would go out sixty to seventy
times in a season. The trails are usually two to
three miles in length. They try to lay a different
trail each time.
The happy outcome of these displacement activities
is that the feared cull of hounds has not proved
necessary. Mr Evans tells me that they breed fewer
hounds than they did but that numbers have been
maintained at between seventy-five and eighty
percent of the levels before the legislation. Foxes
still have to be controlled, of course. Mr Evans
mentions snaring, shooting and trapping as three
of the several methods introduced to replace the
hunting down of foxes. The overall aim, as ever, is
a balanced population of wildlife. V
David Jarman
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
h U n t i n g
3 7

COUNTY HALL
“You should see the sunset,” says one of the County
Council employees on the open-plan sixth floor of
the North Block of County Hall. “On a good day
it’s amazing. The whole place turns pink.” I’m being
taken round Lewes’ largest building by the ESCC
communications officer, Martin Fitzgerald, and I’ve
asked specifically to be shown the office with the
best view. And it’s quite something. It’s 3pm, and
the low sun is casting rich light and long shadows.
On one side you can see right into the courtyard of
Lewes prison, and beyond Juggs Hill. On the other
there’s an unspoilt vista over the castle keep and the
higgledy-piggledy rooftops of the town centre. You
can see straight down the Ouse Valley, too.
Sadly, it’s the view of, rather than from, County Hall
that most people have to deal with every day. Has
there been a more unpopular building in Lewes
since the Normans built the castle to assert their
power over the Saxons? A recent conservation area
appraisal puts it rather succinctly. ‘It is accepted
that the County Hall building… is an unattractive,
visually dominant building of no architectural merit
whose demolition would be welcomed by most
Lewes residents’.
So why was it built? In 1964 council workers were
spread around 13 different buildings all over Lewes,
and a single central base was desperately needed.
County Architect Mr J Catchpole was given a million
pound budget and four years to work out an
answer. Working from an on-site prefabricated
building, he came up with a fashionable, functional,
boxy design, and oversaw an army of builders turn
that design into reality.
I’ve long been itching to get into the mindset of the
people who commissioned and designed County
Hall, so I was recently thrilled to get hold of the
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
b R i C k s a n d M o R t a R
quarterly ESCC newsletter that came out soon after
the building was opened, by the Duchess of Kent,
on 31st of October 1968. “In order to preserve the
attractive silhouette of the town and its ancient
castle when viewed from the south,” it reads, “the
County Hall has been designed in the form of three
large blocks of varying heights…” It also tells how
a careful choice of brickwork helps it to ‘harmonise
with other buildings on the skyline, particularly the
nearby church of St Anne.’ Oh, and it mentions
those panoramic views, of course.
It’s almost exactly forty years since County Hall
was opened, and there has recently been a spate of
articles in the local papers about the Tory Council’s
desire to move out of the building, and into a new
centre in Polegate. Any such plans, of course, are
unlikely to be followed through within the next ten
years, but there has been quite a heated debate as to
the pros and cons of such a move being made. Some
can’t wait to see the back of the building and would
welcome any development in its place.
A sizeable number of people, however, are taking
the opposite view, worried about the potential economic
impact of losing County Hall, and its 1,200
workers, and the loss of prestige Lewes would suffer.
My gut feeling puts me firmly in the latter camp.
As we wander through the corridors of local power,
I ask Martin if anyone has ever tried to give County
Hall a listed status. He looks at me quizzically, to
see if I’m joking. I am. The truth is, if it were any
other building, I might now be making a politically
expedient volte-face in my critical appraisal of the
aesthetic qualities of the place. But it’s County Hall,
and no rose coloured glasses are strong enough for
that, however nice the views are.
Alex Leith
V
3 9

THE BIG WIG BALL
How big is your wig? That’s the question Tongue and Groove are asking anyone wanting to go to the brashest
New Year’s Eve bash in town. It’s a dress requirement, you see, to wear a wig to the Ball, and the bigger the better.
Tongue and Groove, of course, are those outrageously dressed psychedelic groovers, led by the manic singer
Phil Rhodes, who perform good-as-the-original covers of the coolest hits from the 60s to the present day, from
Brown Sugar to Champagne Supernova, via Vicious and I Predict a Riot. Rhodes has built a top reputation as
stunt-pulling lead singer who’s guaranteed to make any party go with a bang – often literally. The singer himself
will be modelling what is likely to be the biggest hairpiece of the night, and will be swapping wigs between songs
– there will be prizes for the best wigs in the audience, and a special booth to tart up any under-par rugs.
“Wignormous visuals will illuminate the evening, which promises to be an experience, an adventure, a magical
dream, a veritable feast, a sublime trip through time, a shimmering portal into 2009” says Rhodes, of the night.
“It’s more than just a gig… it’s a big wig gig… the bigger the wig… the more you dig… why would you want to
be anywhere else?”
All Saints, 8pm till late, pizza oven and bar, tickets £25 from Laporte’s (478817) and MG&M (480641).
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
4 1

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THE GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENTS
Opinion is divided in the Viva office about the joys or otherwise of Christmas shopping. Experience
tells me there’s a gender divide – men prefer the last minute dash, whereas women are
more likely to shop in advance. When I asked my beloved why the men in the long queue outside
Harveys on Christmas Eve didn’t nip in to buy their Christmas beer a couple of weeks before,
he scoffed at me. ‘You’re missing the point,’ he said. Apparently there’s a spirit of brotherhood
in that queue, which is all part of the male Christmas experience. I’m trying to write that
without sniggering. But one thing we all agree on is that if you are going to shop, you should do
it locally. Lewes is a fabulous place for it, so long as you’re on foot. Lots of independent traders,
lots of diversity, and most importantly, plenty of cafes or pubs en route for a reviving cuppa or
a swift half. Our writing team were sent off to have a good rummage in the shops, seeing what
delights could be unearthed amongst Lewes traders. Some were asked to spend only Lewes
Pounds, and all had varying amounts of dosh in their pockets. All manner of things were found,
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20 POUNDS... ON MYSELF
David Jarman gets all self indulgent
In last year’s Viva Christmas gift supplement I
trawled the Lewes shops for presents not absolutely
unacceptable to a Goddaughter. This
year I can gratify my own tastes, but only to
the tune of £20.
Always thirsty, I head straight to Market Street
for advice. Oenophiles have been poorly
served in Lewes in recent years so the advent
of the Sussex Wine Company is welcome.
The eclectic choice of wines ranges from as
near to home as Breaky Bottom to as far afield
as India. Argentinian wines are a speciality. A
Malbec from the top of Susana Balbo’s range
is recommended for a memorable Christmas
day lunch (£19.95) and Boxing Day leftover
turkey could easily be mopped up by a bottle
or three of Woollaston’s organic Pinot Noir
from New Zealand (£18.95).
Another addiction is books and my two or
three a day habit is happily supplied by the
town’s second-hand bookshops. New books
are more of a problem, but I do eventually
unearth two gems. The latest ‘Pevsner Architectural
Guide’ is devoted to Brighton
and Hove. The 244 pages of erudite, but
thoroughly readable, text and splendid photographs
are a bargain at £9.99. I find it at the
Barbican bookshop, well worth a visit even
while the castle is closed. Bags of Books in
South Street has The Young Inferno (£12.99).
A new collaboration between our very own
John Agard and the wonderful illustrator
Satoshi Kitamura, it is a radical take on Dante.
Agard’s guide through hell is not Virgil but
Aesop (rhymes with ‘treetop’). I should perhaps
point out that the bouncer guarding the
gateway to the Second Circle is not Frankenstein
as Agard’s text has it, but the monster
created by Victor Frankenstein.
An alternative to books and wine would be
Pen to Paper, quite my favourite shop in
Lewes. On my visit to 170a High Street I
am immediately seduced by the Edward Gorey
Neglected Murderesses calendar (£9.99).
Neglected murderess for May for example
is Lettice Finding who shot Edgar Cutlet,
whose mistress she was, during the interval
of a touring company production of Rosmersholm
in Manchester in 1934. Eventually
I plump for a diary. For over twenty years I
have been an admirer of the diaries produced
by the Redstone Press. The theme for 2009 is
‘Black and White’ (£14.95). Trouble is, writing
in it would just spoil it. As ever Pen to
Paper have the solution – invisible ink (£5.99
a bottle).

25 POUNDS - ON FOOD AND DRINK
The Nibbler goes for Venezuelan Black... and fennel seeds
The Nibbler has a fondness for stockings,
and, of course, for food as well. So a stocking
full of edible and gluggable treats would
create a very merry Christmas in the Nibbler
residence. Where can a girl spend a fistful of
Lewes Pounds for a midnight feast? First
port of call is Bruditz on Station Street.
The posh German chocolate advent calendars
look alluring, but would be naught but
twenty-four empty windows come Christmas
Eve, and anyway, would not fit in even
an outsize stocking without leading to horrendous
ladders. Her attention is drawn to
what look like fat little gold candles priced
£5.99, but turn out to be sticks of Willie’s
Venezuelan Black, which sound deliciously
illicit, but are in fact 100% pure, single bean
cacao. Perfect for grating into a Mexican
mole. The gold-wrapped marzipan sticks at
£1.99 bring to mind oversized cigars, and the
sugar mice and colourful chocolate hearts are
cute and reasonable, at less than a pound. But
after so much sweetness, her thoughts turn
to savoury items, so she heads up to the War
Memorial to gaze at Cheese Please’s condiment-laden
shelves. Some delicious pickles
are to be found, like Victorian Spiced Mar-
row and Whisky Chutney for £3.99 or Gin
and Tonic Turnip at £3.45, and the Smoky
Chilli Nuts look divine too. Then down to
the Riverside to compare what Say Cheese
have in the chutney department. It is tempting
to buy cheese, but she fears, stored in the
foot of a nylon stocking, the elegant reek of
Stinking Bishop might become hellish. But
their mustards, crackers and pickles, including
the addictive Red Chilli jelly from Ouse
Valley foods, are perfect. Then, a trip to
Cliffe to the Harvey’s Brewery Shop seems
advisable for something to wash it all down.
A bottle of Quids In Sussex Golden Ale costs
a perfect Lewes Pound, including 5p deposit,
and a miniature of 10 year old Laphroaig is
£3.55. May’s over the road sells another bottled
local ale, Wizard Wand Waver, for £2,
and a saunter into Bill’s yields a jar of pickled
garlic. Finally, fearing buffalo breath, a trip
to Chaula’s yields a pot of pretty multi-coloured
sugar-coated fennel seeds for £1.29.
They freshen the mouth and are good for the
digestion too apparently, always handy during
the season of over-indulgence. Which for
the Nibbler lasts pretty much all year.

Ten LEWES POUNDS... ON MY DAUGHTER
Adrienne Campbell finds an Aladdin’s cave... in Station Street
‘I’m not getting into Christmas this year,’ my
middle teenage daughter announced over supper
recently. I was intrigued as to why she had made
this decision. ‘It’s just not exciting any more. I
used to look forward to Christmas Day and the
presents for ages beforehand. But I’ve realised
that I have to give as many presents as I get.’ I’m
relieved Anna’s doing the rebellion thing; I mean
what self-respecting teenager wants to hang out
with their parents more than they absolutely have
to? My memories of Christmas Day were of incarceration
in meaningless ‘forced family fun’.
For teenagers, friends bring all the comfort and
joy one could possibly need.
As for presents, these last few years our children
have told us what they wanted for Christmas,
usually followed by complex negotiations, with
the groundrules on my part being no batteries,
no plastic crap or clothes from China and no
screens. This year Anna wants us to help her get
to a music festival in France next summer. I also
want to buy her a little present for Christmas
Day, something special to remind her that I still
love her, in this period when she’s making the
transition away from home.
With a budget of ten Lewes Pounds, Margarita
Hale’s shop, Punzi, on Station Street seems a
good choice. Margarita has a plate of exquisite
handmade pendants for a tenner each in her window.
But a necklace made from 2,000-year-old
beads from Afghanistan catches my eye and I buy
it for Anna. ‘Those beads have a story,’ Margarita
tells me. ‘They come from an ancient underground
cave factory that was revealed recently
when there was an earthquake.’
Margarita’s shop is itself an Aladdin’s cave of jewels
and colour, every surface covered with the art
and gemstones of her trade. She works more with
a painter’s eye than that of a craftsperson, she says.
‘Sometimes I spread out the beads and stones
and work with them like a painting.’ Margarita
is passionate about supporting local traders: ‘I do
as much shopping as I can on Station Street; it’s
overlooked as a place to shop,’ she says. ‘I’m concerned
about our small traders. We put so much
time and care in to our businesses. People visit
Lewes or move here because of the wonderful
independent shops and then don’t make the connection
that you have to actually buy things from
them.’ Lewes Pounds were designed to help keep
wealth circulating in Lewes. As our globalised
consumer culture starts to reveal major flaws,
common sense dictates our new year’s resolution:
Slow Down, Buy Less, Buy Local.

FIFTEEN LEWES POUNDS... ON A NEPHEW
Alex Leith subjects his nephew to a life of non-league football
I have 15 Lewes Pounds to spend, and I have
a three-year-old nephew to buy a Christmas
present for.
He hasn’t yet chosen a football team to support
– as far as I know, he is as yet unaware of the notion
of different teams from different towns playing
competitive matches against one another.
So I have an idea. If I buy him a Lewes FC hat
and scarf, will this encourage him to support the
local team? Could it nurture a lifelong emotional
attachment with his hometown club?
The idea fires me. Perfect! If he supports Lewes,
he will understand football in a different way
from most other kids. Instead of watching his
team on the TV, he will go to real matches. Instead
of swapping cards with the image of his
favourite players on them, he will see the players
in the flesh, in the street. His will be a nuts-andbolts,
grass-roots football experience. A genuine
one. Not one that’s fired by the love of glamour
and celebrity.
Then I think again. Would I want him to have
an emotional tie with a smalltown club? Could it
shape his personality in any detrimental way? Is
he likely to become more cynical, or downtrodden
by the experience of tying his emotions to a
team whose chances of success are strictly limited
by the size of the town they play in? Might such
an involvement thwart his sense of ambition?
I wander down to Cliffe with such thoughts in
my mind. I know that they sell football regalia
in Intersport, so I walk in. I ask the guy at the
counter some quickfire questions. Yes, they do
sell Lewes FC hats and scarves, though I’ll have
to wait until the afternoon for the hat. Yes, he will
accept Lewes Pounds (though he finds it an unusual
request).
So I have an hour or so to ponder the issue.
There’s plenty of other stuff on sale in the shop,
after all. Would a Brighton hat not give him more
chance of having a fulfilling football-supporting
life? Why not get him an Arsenal scarf? They
play a beautiful brand of attacking football.
Back in the shop, a couple of hours later, I’ve still
not decided. I think of some of the cold, miserable
afternoons I’ve spent down the Dripping
Pan. I ponder on the poor immediate future of a
club faced with relegation, and in financial crisis.
Is this any way to introduce a kid to the beautiful
game?
Then I remember the pure joy I felt on New
Year’s Day, when we beat Eastbourne away. A
great victory is a great victory and it’s all the more
worth it if you’ve had to work hard for it. “It’ll be
character building,” I think, and the decision is
made. Poor kid.

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FORTY POUNDS... ON A SISTER
Nick Williams caters for his Lewes-loving sibling
My sister loves Christmas and she loves Lewes.
Sadly, she lives in Dorchester. There’s nothing
wrong with the County Town of Dorset - it’s
just not Lewes. And this Christmas her Lewes
cravings will worsen because she can’t visit. I
need to help - I’m going to send her a selection
of gifts from around the town.
Normally at this stage, I’d plump for a Bill’s
hamper and a case of Harveys Christmas ale.
However, those gifts appeal more to me, so I
think again. I wander along the High Street,
admiring gifts in Kilim and The Workshop.
When the pipes in Catlin’s catch my eye, I realise
I need to focus. I head to Kings Framers
where Josh has a great idea. He points towards
‘the foldaway shopper’ - basically a small cotton
bag, which opens up to become a big cotton
bag with the small one inside. It’s flowery,
it’s spotty, it makes me think I’m saving the
planet. It’s a start, I take it. Flushed with success,
I stride to the Town Hall, and swap two
crisp twenties for forty Lewes Pounds. As well
as paying for my bag with five of them, four
more are going inside - one each for Sarah,
Olly, Maisie and Harvey to use on their next
visit to town.
I need things to fill the bag, and Flint’s book
display grabs my attention, I choose two
- Sussex Women - produced in the town by
Snake River Press - handy for someone aspiring
to Sussex life? - and a little book of lullabies
and poems to help get young Harvey to
sleep. Further down Station Street the newly
opened Azure catches my eye. I enter, and reemerge
with Christmas candles, a sequined
purse with a star design and a pack of quirky
post-it notes. I’m in the zone now and I’m virtually
running when I get to Laporte’s. I’m
also shopping strangely, deciding on a packet
of cat biscuits (people forget the cat at Christmas…)
and some Boxing Day Chutney. I’m
becoming mildly obsessed with my shopping
task - but where next? Almost without thinking,
I’m inside Lounge choosing Christmas
decorations, a nice re-cycled notebook and
a great value scarf. The bag is bulging. The
task is done. Hopefully it reminds her a bit of
Lewes, and I can look forward to showing her
family where to spend Lewes’ own currency
in the New Year.

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LATE NIGHT SHOPPING
Late Night Shopping in Lewes is enormous fun, especially if the
weather goddess is in good humour. It’s a treat to be able to wander
about the car-free streets, bumping into friends, sipping mulled
wine, and enjoying the festive atmosphere. The streets may feel like
the South Bank at this year’s event, to be held Thursday December
4th, because the theme is ‘Perform’. Look out for stilt walkers strolling
past, as well as other street performances from the lively folk at
Firecracker Circus. There will be a selection of music, on a trailer I understand,
from the talented Starfish performers. Dance Republic will
be dancing, Priory School children will be singing carols and some
Sussex Downs students will be putting on a Commedia dell’Arte performance.
The evening kicks off at 5.30pm, with the High Street shut
to traffic from the Bottleneck to the end of Cliffe until 9pm. Money
raised will go to projects working with young people in the performing
arts. There will be no fireworks this year, but there is a Treasure Hunt.
You can collect entry forms from the Town Hall. If you get peckish,
lots of hot food is available, including a hog roast, cooked by Glyn
Thomas, as well as fish and chips, burgers and hot doughnuts. Those
whose Christmas is not complete without a ‘Ho ho ho!’ on the lap
of Santa can find him in his grotto from 5.30pm in Lewes House on
School Hill. Look out for Morris Dancers as you mooch around the
Lewes shops at your leisure, without fear of traffic wardens, who will
probably be shopping too. And good news for beleaguered shoppers
and shopkeepers - Cliffe High Street will be clear of roadworks until
the New Year, so you can head down to Harveys, Oxfam, Bags of
Books, May’s and all the splendid Cliffe shops without being deafened
by drills. Don’t forget all the interesting independent shops on Friars
Walk, Station Street and in the Needlemakers. County Hall car park
will be open. Emma Chaplin

s h o p p i n g
5 8
CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS
I miss Elphicks at Christmas. Such a distinctive smell of bulbs when you walked in, and it was a
lovely place to buy decorations. Lots of baubles on our tree were bought there, one or so a year.
But my granddad, Vivien Sidney, was not a man given to buying anything if he could avoid it, so
he made his own eccentric Stig-of-the-Dump type Christmas decorations with various household
items, plus some red and green crepe paper. Then he’d adorn all the picture frames and mirrors with
bunches of holly and ivy transported from somewhere mysterious (best not to ask), in the back of
his Morris Traveller. Sometimes we’d attack random objects with a can of silver or gold spray paint.
For those who want to make their own paper chains or other festive creations, Tash tori, Sussex
Stationers, Woolworths, and WH Smiths all stock craft paraphernalia. And if you want to make your
own wreath – you can go along to workshops put on by Hilary Moore www.hilarymooreflowers.
co.uk They also sell ready-made wreaths, as do Flint, Riverside Flowers and Miss Bloomsbury. As
for buying decorations, lots of Lewes shops have smart ones. Room has dangling fairies, Flint have
delicate glass, Bright Ideas have jolly decorations, Wickle have Danish baubles. Then in Cliffe, lots
of goodies can be found in May’s, Oxfam and Simon David. Emma Chaplin
viva lewes 19/11/2008 22:15 Page 1
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W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M

IFORD
Half farm, half village
John Robinson looks down at my choice
of footwear, and grimaces slightly. He’s
about to take me on a little tour round
his village, from the front yard of his
pink Georgian house. I’m wearing a pair
of black Chelsea boots. He’s wearing
wellies.
As we set off, I ask him how long he’s
been living in Iford. He leads me
through a gate, and we squelch our way
across a waterlogged pasture field. “I was
born here,” he replies. “My grandfather
bought the whole place in 1895, give or
take a few houses.”
Joseph ‘JC’ Robinson, a Quaker, purchased
quite a concern, measuring 2,200
acres, stretching from the outskirts of
Brighton to the Ouse, and employing
over 40 hands, all of whom had cottages
on the estate.
“Iford’s a funny place,” says John. “It’s
a farm which has turned into a village.”
The size of the farm hasn’t shrunk since
his grandfather’s day, but the size of
the team needed to run it certainly has.
“Now we only have four full time workers,”
he says, unwittingly revealing while
sub-vocalising their names to count
them, that half of them are called Brian.
“Such is the way farming has gone.”
Which leaves a lot of former workers’ cottages freed up for rent and
sale. As we walk along the loop of a road the village is built around,
John tells me what’s become of them: “we rent that one; we sold
that one; that’s still one of ours.” Many of the buildings we pass are
still used for farming: there’s a grain store, several barns, a yard for
tractors, a cowshed full of hay-munching cattle, and so on. Others,
standing in between them, are residential houses, with TV aerials,
well-kempt lawns, and cars parked neatly outside. The most surreal
apparition is a buzzing open-plan mortgage brokers’ office built in
what used to be the milking sheds, with ten to fifteen young people
working inside at their computers, who would have looked more in
place in Hoxton Square.
There are plenty more surprises along the way, as John warms to
the task of showing me the village’s idiosyncrasies. A splendid row of
healthy elms, their leaves a patchwork of yellow and green; a plaque
announcing that the Greenwich Meridian runs through the village;
what was once a Victorian boating lake, covered in a lime green carpet
of floating weed.
I haven’t been to Iford since the early eighties, when I hurdled a
number of rites of passage during the teenage parties which were all
the rage in that era in the village hall, built by John’s grandfather in
1931. I’m sad to find it’s locked when we get there, but a chap arrives
on cue with a key, so we explore its interior, which brings back a host
of hazy memories.
And finally to the jewel in the village’s crown, its Norman church.
Again it seems to be locked; again someone breathlessly arrives, as if
by magic, with a key, which is ancient and iron and as big as a tablespoon.
There’s a graceful Romanesque arch announcing what might
generously be described as a transept; the interior is almost all nave,
well lit through tiny stained-glass windows. A beautiful place which
demands we speak in a reverential hush.
The church, of course, is surrounded by a lush graveyard, where a
number of John’s relatives are buried, and where he, he tells me,
is glad to know he will finish up. Then he takes me to a flint wall
overlooking the Ouse Valley, and announces something alarming.
“There is a government agency plan to demolish the western bank
of the lower Ouse, allowing it to flood into the valley,” he says. “This
would turn the whole area in front of us into a tidal salt marsh, which
would, at high tide, probably reach this wall.” He would lose a third
of his farm. There’s little he can do apart from hope they change
their mind.
Iford-on-sea? It wouldn’t be the first time. John tells me that the remains
of fishing vessels have been found near the church, and in the
Domesday Book the annual food production output of the village
included ‘16,000s of herrings’. With that strange thought in mind
we trudge back to his house. He invites me in, to look at some old
photographs, and gently reminds me to leave my sodden, muddy, illchosen,
elastic-sided boots outside the door. V Alex Leith
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
V i V a V i L L a g E s
6 1

GET YOUR SKATES ON
Our winters are so temperate, it’s hard to imagine the
Thames being frozen hard enough for King Henry
VIII to cross it on horseback (poor horse, in more
ways than one). But Britain did experience a mini-ice
age between 1200 and 1850, with the Thames freezing
so often that carnivals, called Frost Fairs, were held
on it, the last one in February 1814. I guess the Ouse
must have frozen too, and I’m sure people skated on
the Pells pond. In the absence, these days, of much
frost and snow (in the south anyway), we can still skate
in the open air. Brighton Marina has a small rink, but
London has a proliferation of temporary outdoor rinks where you can glide gracefully along, looking at
the London sky. Although for some of us, repeatedly tripping over your feet until you end up with sore,
soggy bottom is a more likely outcome. Rinks can be found at: Somerset House, Hyde Park and the
Natural History Museum in central London, although I’ve been told Tower Bridge is less crowded. A
bit further out, you’ve got Greenwich, Hampton Court, Hampstead Heath and the beautiful Temperate
House at Kew Gardens. Advice is – wrap-up warmly, wear gloves, and take a change of clothes. Prices
vary, around £7 for under 12s, £10-£15 for adults, depending on the time of day. Emma Chaplin
More info at www.020.co.uk/c/christmas/ice-rinks/london.shtml
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
V i V a k i d s
6 3

THE GAFFER TAPES
We’re still capable of beating the drop, says Lewes FC manager Kevin Keehan
Rumours about me have been flying around, so I’d
like to use this space to dispel them. I have not at
any time in the last month offered to resign, and I
have not been asked to resign either.
I must say the possibility of doing the former
crossed my mind after we were knocked out of
the FA Cup by Leiston at the Dripping Pan at the
end of October. We should have beaten them at
their place: we missed a penalty and a number of
gilt-edged chances to put them out first time of
asking.
In the replay, we were missing eight regular players,
but that’s no excuse. We handed them easy
goals, they got their tails up, and we were unable
to break them down.
It was the lowpoint of my footballing career, but I
had to put it behind me. I believe that if we put out
our best XI, we still have a chance of staying up.
My main job is to keep us up, and I’m going to go
through with that battle.
Not getting to the next round cost the club at least
£12,000, but it was not that which led to the financial
problems that Lewes FC have been facing this
last month. We never inked any cup runs into the
budget, because we couldn’t be sure we’d progress
further than we did. The problem has come because
of the credit crunch affecting sponsorship,
and because the crowds have been slightly lower
than we estimated they would be. Of course that
money would have helped, but not for long.
Meanwhile, the club is looking at offers of either
investors or takeover bids. I’m fully aware that if a
consortium takes over, I might not be part of their
plans. But I’m not going to waste time worrying
about something that’s not in my control. It’s difficult
enough worrying about what is.
I don’t believe all the speculation is unsettling the
players. I’ve kept them in touch with what’s going
on, and at no point have their wages been at risk.
I’ve just told them to get on with things, and to
their credit, they have.
As I write this we’ve just played against the top
two teams in the league, and we’ve given a good
showing of ourselves, particularly against Burton
Albion, who beat us 1-0 with a dubious penalty.
I’ve got to say, that I think the only person in the
ground who thought it was a penalty was the ref-
eree, but he’s the one who counts. Afterwards their
manager Nigel Clough said that he thinks that
we’re good enough to stay up, and I’ve got to say
I agree with him – if we can keep our best players
fit, and if I can continue to attract good loan signings
to the Pan.
Finally it’s important to remember that Lewes FC
is a community club, and the Under 18 and Ladies
teams are both having fantastic seasons. The kids
qualified for the First Round proper of the Youth
Cup for the first time in their history, and the Ladies
are doing fantastically well in both their major
competitions. The two teams are getting better
and better and all credit to the players, and everybody
behind the scenes for that. V
Home games in December: Stevenage (6th); Woking
(20th); Kettering (28th). Eastbourne Borough visit
on New Year’s Day
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
F o o t b a L L
Photographs by James Boyes
6 5

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THOMAS TURNER’S DIARY
An 18th-century East Hoathly shopkeeper, fond of bubble and squeak
Extracts from the diary that Thomas Turner
of East Hoathly kept between February
1754 and July 1765 were first published
in the Sussex Archaeological Collections
in 1859. These extracts, unrepresentative
of the whole, were marred by mistranscriptions
and tendentious chronological
rearrangements. Subsequent editions perpetuated
these shortcomings and it was not
until 1984 that a reliable text was published
by the Oxford University Press.
Sometimes called ‘The Diary of a Village
Shopkeeper’, this title does scant justice to
the extraordinary range of Thomas Turner’s
activities. For in addition to supplying
the East Hoathly population of some 350
souls with every conceivable retail commodity,
Turner wrote wills, kept accounts
and, at various times, served as church warden,
overseer of the poor, village schoolmaster
and surveyor of the highways.
Some aspects of the diary, Turner’s meticulous
record of his myriad financial dealings
for example, are likely to be of interest only to historians.
Medieval historians may find the account of the Battle of
Hastings, prompted by a visit to Battle Abbey, less useful.
Turner’s assertion that 97,974 ‘common men’ were slain on
the battlefield seems remarkably precise.
And there is considerable repetition, although sometimes the
repetitions acquire a certain charm. While eager to record
what he ate every day, Turner also seems anxious to establish
a reputation for frugality.
‘We dined on the remains of yesterday’s dinner’ is a constant
refrain, once appearing for eleven days in succession. An occasional
modification is ‘We dined on the remains of yesterday’s
dinner with the addition of...’ The Turner household
seems endlessly inventive with leftovers. On 3rd November
1759 the diary reads ‘We dined on the remains of Sunday,
Monday, Tuesday and yesterday’s dinners with the addition of
a light pudding and some turnips’. That, one reflects, might
take some beating. Yet the very next month, on 2nd December,
the reader finds, ‘We dined on the remains of Sunday,
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and yesterday’s dinner with
the addition of some mutton broth and cold rice pie.’
Partly, of course, the diary simply reflects how boring village
life must sometimes have been, partly how much was one
at the mercy of bores. ‘In the even Charles Nebuchar came
in, in his road from Burwash to Lewes; he stayed all night.
Related to me his travels wherein he says he hath been in 26
countries and 15 cathedrals.’
Not that Turner himself was blameless in this regard. One
caller at the Turner household on Christmas Day, 1756 may
have regretted his sociability. ‘In the even Tho. Davy sat with
us about 3 hours and to whom I read 7 of Tillotson’s sermons.’
Visits to Lewes are frequent but not always happy. The diary
covers the years of Turner’s first marriage. Peggy Slater was
a Lewes girl and the couple married in Lewes. The union
was not a happy one. Within five months Turner is writing,
‘John Richards called and told me of the malicious report
at Lewes of my wife’s and my not agreeing. I then hired Elphick’s
house and went to Lewes.’
And like all independent small traders Turner is prone to
self-pity. He often complains of villagers ‘buying nothing of
me that amounts to any value, but every time they want anything
of value, they go to Lewes’. V
David Jarman
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
L i t E R a R y L E W E s
6 7

Picture courtesy of Sussex Archaeological Society
THE LEWES AVALANCHE - CHRISTMAS 1836
‘An awful instance of the uncertainty of human life’
‘The furniture and clothes of the poor sufferers were mixed in
utter confusion with broken roofs, black bricks from chimneys,
and ruined crockery, while occasional pieces of cake and plum
pudding, intermingled with holly and other evergreens, exhibited
bitter memorials of the festivity of Christmas, which had terminated
so fatally to some.’ And indeed – as William Thomson,
a gentleman-brewer residing on School Hill, also narrated – the
day before, on Tuesday December 27th, eight people had died
when an avalanche of frozen snow shattered and buried Boulder
Row, the seven pebble-fronted cottages at the end of South
Street that Malling parish rented to house pauper families. The
Snowdrop Inn now occupies the site.
By Christmas Day 1836 massive snow drifts had already isolated
Lewes, and were balanced fifteen feet high on the brow of the
chalk cliff behind Boulder Row. Ominously, late on Boxing Day,
a ‘considerable fall’ crushed a sawing shed at the timber yard
near these ‘Poor Houses’, causing its owner, Mr Charles Wille,
to urge the forty or so paupers at the Row to quit. Some did. Early
next morning frightening fissures appeared in the drifts above.
So fresh appeals were made, led by Robert Hyam who kept the
Schooner beershop opposite. But some inmates, mostly women
and children, were still there when, just after nine, ‘a huge field
of solid snow’ toppled over the brink. Its children were still there
when, just after nine, ‘a hue field of solid snow’ toppled over
the brink. Its force swept the cottages across South Street and
smashed them against a flint wall above the river Ouse.
Thereupon Mr Thomson took charge, alerted by the solicitor
John Hoper who promised to pay the expenses of rescue.
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
L o C a L h i s t o R y
Gangs of local workmen, many being
sinewy chalk-pit labourers, were
equipped with shovels and well supplied
with beer. Thomson caused
them to dump the chalk, first in the
river, and then against the foot of
the cliff, to cushion any further fall.
This duly occurred, briefly burying
him and several workmen. But
the grim dangerous task of retrieval
resumed till the last buried victim,
Susan Hayward from Firle, aged 34,
was uncovered, ‘dead and cold’.
Susan was visiting her father William
Geer, aged 82, who died amid
the wreckage of his fireplace. Other
victims were Joseph Wood, aged 15,
Mrs Phoebe Barnden, Mrs Maria
Bridgman and her daughter Mary.
A joyful shout greeted the digging
out alive of Mrs Sherlock and
two grandchildren, wedged safely
beneath fallen timber. Sadly, the
corpse of their mother, Mrs Jane
Books, soon followed. And found
crushed against the flint wall was
Mrs Mary Taylor, aged 42, the
mother of eleven children. She had
returned to fetch a shawl for her
infant when the avalanche struck.
The baby, cradled in her arms, survived.
Two bruised and fractured
boys were also extracted, Jeremiah
Rooke and John Bridgman.
Waggons duly conveyed the dead,
except Susan, through deep snow
to a single grave in Malling churchyard.
A heart-felt public subscription
repaid Mr Hoper and funded
‘Assistance to Families and Children’,
also a tablet in the church
warning ‘Be ready also, for the Son
of Man cometh at an Hour when
ye Think not’. Charity and dogged
Labour, Godliness, and intrepid Mr
Thomson – the Victorian Age was
dawning. V Colin Brent
6 9

sy_Viva_128mm x 90mm.qxd 19/12/07 16:35 Page 1
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CHRISTMAS COMES BUT ONCE A YEAR
Have you bought any Easter eggs yet? I only ask
because I received my first Christmas card (actually
from a fellow MP) on November 2nd. It seems that,
just as climate change is playing havoc with our seasons,
so are our shops. For my MP colleague was
not alone. I went into one shop in Lewes, which had
better remain nameless, to buy some kids’ stuff for
Hallowe’en, ahead of October 31st, only to be told
they had “no room” for such products on account of
the space allocated to the Christmas display. Not to
mention the many mince pies weighing down supermarket
shelves, all of which have a sell-by date way
in advance of December 25th.
Surely the whole point of seasonal products is they
are just that – seasonal – and extending the time they
are available from a small window to a gaping period
of months somehow lessens their attractiveness.
They are no longer special.
I don’t want to get too philosophical about all this,
but I do believe that we as humans, and indeed the
same goes for animals, resonate more harmoniously
with a cycle, rather than with an endless repetition of
the same. Strawberries belong to June, mulberries to
August. The idea of having them in December just
jars with me.
...but does it have to start in October?
So each year I try to operate a policy of not buying
anything from a shop which displays Christmas
goods before December 1st, until that date is
reached. And I wonder how the studio audiences feel
when they pre-record all those Xmas TV shows, replete
with holly, sleigh bells, Santas, and mistletoe, in
the middle of a baking hot July?
For my part, Parliament continues up until about a
week before the 25th, and constituency work continues
after that, including the usual round of surgeries.
December is also the time when, every year, I force
myself to get up horribly early to go round to the
sorting offices – I have four in my patch – to thank
our postmen and women for all they do. Getting up
in the middle of the night is not my idea of fun, but
I figure if they do it six times a week in all weathers,
I can’t really complain.
Anyway, by the time you read this, December will
almost certainly be upon us, and Christmas really
will be on the horizon. I do hope, just for a change,
that it snows, and snows heavily for Christmas Day
and beyond.
In the meantime, if it’s not too early (which it is) may
I wish everybody a Happy New Year. V
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
n o R M a n b a k E R
7 1

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Photograph: Katie Moorman
LEWES GOLF COURSE
King of the swingers Rob Read ruins a good walk
I’ve spent many happy hours watching golf on television,
absorbed by the apparent ease with which
the best players powerfully and precisely send a ball
around some of the most beautiful green spaces
across the world. And I’ve secretly always wanted
to be able to do the same.
However, the last time I had a seven iron in my
hand I was nine years old on a pitch and putt course
in Sheffield and my friend Jonathan Parker suffered
a rather nasty injury. The closest I have got since is
crazy golf on Hastings sea-front.
So on a glorious late October day, arriving to try
out a lesson at Lewes golf club, what could I achieve
in just half an hour? Quite a lot, remarkably. It turns
out that having no experience is perfect: I’ve got no
bad habits to undo. Having lessons is the best first
thing you can do.
Club professional, Tony, takes me out to the practice
range which looks along to the Martyrs’ Memorial
and down over Lewes and beyond; a more
beautiful setting I can’t conceive. The first time that
I manage to send the ball up and out over the range
– I gaze after it in wonder, not quite believing that
I did that.
The secret it seems is to ignore the ball and focus
on the swing. The ball just gets in the way and then
is propelled up and out, a magical white dot in the
clear blue sky. I can almost hear the whispered
commentary of Peter Alliss.
A Lewesian, and someone who learnt his golf on this
W E td Ray y o U t
very course 20 years ago as an eight year old, Tony
arrived back as the club professional in April. He
has a calm and steady presence, taking me through
the basic elements of grip and swing. Watching,
advising. Praising and adjusting. He can see what I
need to do before I can sense it. My body shifting
back a little too much. The arm needing extending
more. I feel supported and enthused.
During the half hour many balls go looping off to
the left. Some to the right. A few grub along the
ground. But the ones which fly up and out leave
me feeling serene and amazed. After half an hour I
can send a ball over 100 yards. Not reliably. I can’t
guarantee where it will end up. But maybe that’s the
beauty of it. It’s hard enough to be really challenging,
but that makes the rewards all the sweeter.
Walking back to the clubhouse, looking out over
the fields south to Newhaven, we chat about the
secret of John Daly’s power (flexibility), evolving
golf club design and the apparent microclimate
around the course. Afterwards in the friendly and
welcoming clubhouse, built twelve years ago for
the club’s centenary, gazing out over those same
fine views, I can see why 500 members come here
all year round.
With the club now offering six half-hour lessons,
supplying all the equipment and baskets of balls
plus two rounds of golf, at £120, I know what I
want for Christmas. I hope Santa Claus is reading.
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
V
7 3

OH NO IT ISN’T!
Oh yes it is! It’s pantomime season, and although
Lewes’ own hugely popular traditional
St Mary’s Social Centre panto, Mother Goose
this year, does not start until Saturday 10th
January, tickets sell out quickly, so book early
on 477733. Me, friends of Dorothy and anyone
who’s ever wondered what would happen
‘if I only had a brain?’ will want to head off to
Brighton’s Theatre Royal to see the wonderful
Wizard of Oz, on from 5th Dec-4th Jan.
A seminal experience for me was playing the
Wicked Witch of the West in a primary school
production. If I do say so myself, I did make
the role of evil, cackling old hag very much
my own.
Alternatively, that provoking minx, Snow
White (fairest of them? Fix!) can be found
with the usual crew of strangely named little men at the Devonshire Park Theatre, Eastbourne, from
12th Dec-11th Jan. Frankly I’ve always thought the stepmother gets a really raw deal.
Emma Chaplin
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
p a n t o
7 5

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zeta

Name: Bill Bruce of WF Bruce Antique Clocks.
What do you do? Sell and restore antique clocks.
Why clocks? My father was a general antiques dealer
in Glasgow, and around the age of nine or ten his
clocks captured my imagination. I went on to study
clock restoration at West Dean College (in Chichester)
and set up the business in 1985.
Where are you based? 5, North Street in Lewes -
where we have our showroom and our workshop.
Why Lewes? I was originally introduced to the area
by my wife. But I was also fascinated to discover that
during the eighteenth century Lewes had a thriving
clock-making industry, with makers such as Thomas
Barratt and in particular Richard Comber producing
work that rivalled and often surpassed anything being
produced in London at the time.
Describe a typical day. I arrive around 8.30am and
my day is a mixture of restoration work at my bench
in the basement and showing customers around our
ground floor showrooms. I also liaise with the highly
skilled hand-cutters, engravers and dial restorers
without whom our business wouldn’t exist.
Who buys from you? The majority of our customers
are local, from Sussex and Kent. A small percentage
are collectors, but most are individuals, couples
or families who simply love the idea of owning and
passing on a beautiful clock.
I’m tempted to buy a clock - what will I need
to spend? A quality clock will start at around £500,
whilst our average price is in the £1,500-£3,500
range. A good quality Sussex clock can be bought for
around £2,000.
Will it be a good investment? It’s impossible to
guarantee, but historically, the cost of quality clocks
continues to rise. This is particularly true of early
17th Century lantern clocks. However, I’d beware of
‘bargains’ - they are usually cheaper for a reason, and
that reason is often poor workmanship.
Do you accept Lewes Pounds? I’d be happy to take
them, but as of yet I haven’t been asked to do so.
If I give you 20 Lewes Pounds where would you
spend them? I’d head down to Simon Beer’s Jewellery
shop off the end of Cliffe High Street. His
beautiful hand-crafted pieces have a simple elegance
to them.
Recommend somewhere to eat out. I’d recommend
the café in the Needlemakers for lunch. Roman
always produces delightfully tasty fresh meals.
What do you think about the Lewes parking
scheme? The council needs to decide whether it’s
trying to help the parking or merely trying to raise
revenue. The manner in which it is policed is the real
problem. My customers are often upset by the wardens’
approach. There is little tolerance shown, and
people often leave the town with a bad taste in the
mouth. It’s all very short sighted.
Any expansion plans? No, because we are lucky to
already employ the best craftspeople in Sussex, and
also to work in a fantastic building which suits all of
our needs.
Is there anything you always get asked?
Q - What’s the most expensive clock in the shop?
A - An incredibly rare 1615 Lantern Clock at around
£60,000.
Share a top tip with our readers. If you want to get
your windscreen really clear of the winter’s grease,
rub it down with old newspaper.
And a Christmas thought? A clock is for life, and
not just for Christmas. V
Interview by Nick Williams
W W W. V i V a L E W E s . C o M
t R a d E s E C R E t s
Photograph: Katie Moorman
8 3

LEWES
DIRECTORY
Please note that though we aim to only take advertising from reputable businesses, we cannot guarantee the
quality of any work undertaken, and accept no reponsibility or liability for any issues arising. To advertise in
VivaLewes please call Steve on 01273 488882 or email steve@vivalewes.com
BUSINESS HOME AND GARDEN
L’ASSISTANT
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If so, we can come to your rescue
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BUSINESS, HOME AND GARDEN

HEALTH AND WELLBEING

HEALTH AND WELLBEING
Restore natural
balance to your life
Try our naturally healthy drug-free
treatments, courses & workshops:
Acupuncture Allergy Testing Aromatherapy Baby Massage
Bowen Technique Childrens Clinic Chinese Herbs
Chiropractic Counselling Cranio-sacral Therapy Dr Hauschka
Homeopathy Hypnotherapy Iridology Life Coaching NLP
Massage (Deep Tissue, Holistic, Indian Head, Pregnancy, Thai, Foot)
Nutrition Osteopathy Physiotherapy Refl exology Shiatsu
Spiritual Counselling Yoga Pilates Reiki Tai Chi
...and many more!
To fi nd out more call 01273 470955
16 Station Street, Lewes BN7 2DB
www.equilibrium-clinic.com

HEALTH AND WELLBEING
TOP TIPS TO... Not putting on weight over Christmas
The average Lewesian will put on 7lbs over Christmas.
Here are a few practical tips to keeping a little trimmer.
Walk between meals - Don’t doze over the Queen’s speech - burn off the turkey with a brisk
stroll.
Don’t snack. Think 300 calories in a mince pie, and 250 in a handful of nuts
Drink white wine. There are 60 more calories per glass of mulled wine.
Drink a pint of water before meals. You’ll feel fuller and eat less.
Kiss under the mistletoe - apparently a one-minute smooch burns off 26 calories - that’s
four minutes for a guilt free 2-finger kit kat.
But if you have piled on the pounds in January you could always…
Join a gym - a one-hour low impact exercise class will burn off around about one mince
pie.
Avoid alcohol - which saves 170 calories per pint of Guinness and 221 per can of Stella you
avoid.
Cut out the takeaways - following tip 2 often helps with this.
If you can’t completly follow point 3, just cut out the extras - (an average size naan bread
contains over 500 calories)
And there’s always colonic irrigation…
I managed to lose 8lbs last year following tips 2 & 4 - and in our January issue we’ll be reporting
back on the effectiveness of tip five…Happy Christmas

LESSONS AND COURSES

TAXIS
gM taxis 01273 473737
Lewes district taxis Ltd 01273 483232
Lewes hackney Varriages 01273 474444
Len’s taxis 01273 488000
PHOENIX CARS
now with eight seater
TO BOOK CALL 01273 475 858
s &g taxis 01273 476116
yellow Cars 01273 472727
USEFUL NUMBERS
Emergency/Utilities
Electricity and gas 0800 783 8866
gas Emergency 0800 111 999
Water Emergency 0845 278 0845
Floodline 0845 988 1188
bt Fault Line 0800 800 151
Victoria hospital 01273 474153
sussex police
(non-emergency) 0845 607 0999
Crimestoppers 0800 555 111
Transport
gatwick Enq 0870 000 2468
heathrow Enq 0870 000 0123
national Rail 08457 484950
transport travel line 0870 608 2608
Other
Childline 0800 1111
Citizens’ advice 01273 473082
Chamber of Commerce 01273 488212
Lewes district Council 01273 471600
Lewes Library 01273 474232
Lewes tourist info 01273 483448
the samaritans 08457 90 90 90

i n s i d E L E F t
M Y L E W E S
THREE LEGS GOOD
In the 1880s one of the best-loved celebrities in Lewes – and indeed around the south of England – was a Jack
Russell terrier called Railway Jack. Jack belonged to a Mr FG Moore, master of Lewes railway station when
it was based on Friars Walk. The dog enjoyed making solo trips on trains, going up and down the various
branches, getting off at such stations as Brighton, London Victoria and Eastbourne. Nobody knows why he
chose a particular destination on a particular day – off he’d go, and he’d be back in time for tea. He became a
well-known and popular figure for miles around.
Even a personal catastrophe didn’t stop him. In 1882, he was hit by a train while making a visit to Norwood
Junction, and broke his left foreleg. He was transported back to Lewes, and immediately taken to see a local vet
in Cliffe High Street, a Mr Robert Stock. Stock amputated the injured leg. Jack made a good recovery, and continued
his travels on three legs. It is said that he was patted on the head by the Prince of Wales at Ascot in 1887.
Count Jack’s legs in this picture, and you can work out that it was taken in or before 1882. This makes it one of
photographer Edward John Bedford’s earliest works. Bedford, a grocer’s son, was to become Principal of Lewes
School of Art, and took photographs in and around Lewes for many decades, from the 1880s onwards. He died,
aged 88, in Lewes, in 1953. Thanks to Dr Sally White from the Sussex Archaeological Society for her research
on this piece. The SAS, also known as Sussex Past, have a vast stock of historical pictures taken in and around
town. If you are interested in obtaining prints of this, or other pictures we have published in this space, you can
contact them at 405736. The SS are currently raising money to refurbish the Castle and Barbican House. If you
are interested in making a donation, please call the same number.

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