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SINCE 1916<br />

VOLUME 81, NUMBER 25 ENIGMA SUCKS APRIL 8, 1994<br />

<strong>Abductions</strong> <strong>cause</strong> <strong>students</strong>, <strong>university</strong> <strong>to</strong> <strong>evaluate</strong> <strong>security</strong><br />

by Kate Hallgren<br />

Before last week's violent crimes,<br />

many Rice <strong>students</strong> felt safe within<br />

the hedges, often walking home late<br />

at night without fearing for their safety.<br />

But now many no longer feel safe and<br />

are looking for changes in campus<br />

<strong>security</strong>.<br />

Four <strong>students</strong>, two males and two<br />

females, were returning from a video<br />

s<strong>to</strong>re at 12:45 am. March 31 when<br />

they were approached by two men<br />

with guns in the Jones College parking<br />

lot and forced back in<strong>to</strong> a student's<br />

car, said Robert Hurst of the Hous<strong>to</strong>n<br />

Police Department<br />

The suspects made the <strong>students</strong><br />

drive <strong>to</strong> an au<strong>to</strong>matic teller machine<br />

by the intersection of Kirby and Main<br />

Street. None had an ATM card.<br />

The suspects then forced the four<br />

<strong>to</strong> drive <strong>to</strong> a building at the 4800 block<br />

of Almeda Road.<br />

At this location, Hurst said, all four<br />

were forced <strong>to</strong> disrobe. One woman<br />

was forced in<strong>to</strong> the car and <strong>to</strong> drive the<br />

suspects around. Both suspects sexually<br />

assaulted her and released her at<br />

2800 Barbee by Texas Southern University.<br />

While the suspects fled on foot,<br />

she ran <strong>to</strong> a nearby home, asked the<br />

woman who answered <strong>to</strong> use the telephone<br />

and called the police.<br />

As ofTuesday, HPD was still in the<br />

process of talking <strong>to</strong> the four victims.<br />

"Hopefully we'll havecompositedrawings<br />

after we talk <strong>to</strong> the victims and<br />

get more details," Hurst said.<br />

At about 11:30 p.m. March 29, a<br />

similar crime occurred in the <strong>university</strong><br />

North Ijot when a lone gunman<br />

reportedly forced a male student <strong>to</strong><br />

drive him <strong>to</strong> an ATM machine, where<br />

the student gave him $400.<br />

Then the student drove around<br />

until the suspect demanded <strong>to</strong> be<br />

dropped off.<br />

"As I understand, this incident with<br />

the four is not connected <strong>to</strong> any other<br />

cases," Hurst said. But he said the<br />

police may uncover links <strong>to</strong> other<br />

crimes.<br />

Although <strong>students</strong> have been<br />

speculating that the suspects were<br />

under the influence of drugs, Hurst<br />

could not confirm this.<br />

"Since the suspects are not in cus<strong>to</strong>dy<br />

there's no way of knowing<br />

whether or not they were in<strong>to</strong>xicated<br />

he said.<br />

University response<br />

University spokesman MikeCinelli<br />

said the <strong>university</strong> has responded in<br />

two ways. First, he cited increased<br />

numbers of patrols and vigilance on<br />

the part of campus police officers.<br />

"I can't talk in specifics about what<br />

we've done about <strong>security</strong> on cam-<br />

pus," Cinelli said. That's part of our<br />

safety measures."<br />

Carl MacDowell.assistant<strong>to</strong> President<br />

Malcolm <strong>Gillis</strong>, said the <strong>university</strong><br />

is conducting ongoing reviews of<br />

campus <strong>security</strong>.<br />

"We are continuing <strong>to</strong> review all<br />

<strong>security</strong> steps the <strong>university</strong> takes all<br />

over campus," MacDowell said. "We<br />

do this continually and this incident<br />

makes our review all the more important"<br />

Second, Cinelli also mentioned increasing<br />

student awareness through<br />

posted bulletins, electronic-mail messages<br />

and college-sponsored meetings.<br />

"Be<strong>cause</strong> we advised everyone<br />

about the incident, that should raise<br />

awareness," he said. Doing this should<br />

help <strong>students</strong> protect themselves, he'<br />

said.<br />

Campus Police Chief Mary<br />

Voswinkel did not return phone calls<br />

from the Thresher.<br />

The Board of Governors met on<br />

March 31 in a regularly scheduled<br />

meeting and approved a budget including<br />

increased funds for campus<br />

lighting and other <strong>security</strong> measures.<br />

But Vice President for Finance and<br />

Administration Dean Currie called th is<br />

"a coincidence" as the budget had<br />

already been drawn up and was passed<br />

in committee the day before.<br />

There are six lighting projects in<br />

the budget, at acost of about $290,(XX),<br />

Currie said.<br />

Voswinkel has said in meetings<br />

that lighting improvements may be<br />

delayed until next semester.<br />

The budget for campus police has<br />

also grown.<br />

"In campus police, I'd asked Malcolm<br />

and he'd approved a number of<br />

salary initiatives <strong>to</strong> make it easier <strong>to</strong><br />

keep campus police officers that tire<br />

SEE SECURITY PAGE 7<br />

<strong>Gillis</strong>' decision prevents Willy's Pub from shutting down<br />

Willy's Pub may undergo renovations that could eliminate this wall and the furniture.<br />

Speech, debate teams face<br />

national, world <strong>to</strong>urnaments<br />

by Rebecca L. Corkill<br />

A freshman debate team qualified for the world <strong>to</strong>urnament in<br />

parliamentary debate, making this the first time Rice will be represented<br />

at this <strong>to</strong>urnament<br />

Will Rice College freshman Ryan Levy and Lovett College freshman<br />

Scott Ruthfield qualified for the world <strong>to</strong>urnament by placing fifth at the<br />

National Parliamentary Debate Championships. It was only the third<br />

competition for the team in this event, which is usually dominated by<br />

experienced seniors.<br />

"We knew we were two freshmen who hadn't competed in a while. It<br />

was a surprise <strong>to</strong> us as well as a surprise <strong>to</strong> everyone else who didn't know<br />

who we were," Ruthfield said.<br />

The freshman team was the only one from Rice <strong>to</strong> qualify for the<br />

national championships, which were held from March 25 <strong>to</strong> 27 at<br />

Colorado College.<br />

To qualify for the national <strong>to</strong>urnament they had <strong>to</strong> place among the<br />

<strong>to</strong>p 50 in the nation in earlier <strong>to</strong>urnaments.<br />

Although University of New Mexico won the <strong>to</strong>urnament, Levy and<br />

Ruthfield were the only team <strong>to</strong> defeat the national champions in<br />

SEE DEBATE PAGE 6<br />

by Ryan Koopmans<br />

After reviewing two proposals from<br />

the Willy's Pub Committee, President<br />

Malcolm <strong>Gillis</strong> decided last week <strong>to</strong><br />

waive distributive charges for this year<br />

and reduce the charges for next year,<br />

keeping the Pub from closing down.<br />

Pub Manager Antroy Arreoja was<br />

happy with the decision. "It was generous<br />

of him <strong>to</strong> waive the distribution<br />

charges," Arreola said. "Thatwillgive<br />

us more money for our capital improvement<br />

program."<br />

The Pub has lost money in the<br />

past, but it possessed a cushion of<br />

money that kept it operating. The Pub<br />

was in danger of closing this year<br />

when that surplus ran out<br />

The Pub has not made a profit for<br />

several years be<strong>cause</strong>ofthedecrease<br />

in alcohol sales <strong>cause</strong>d by the change<br />

in the drinking age from 19 <strong>to</strong> 21 and<br />

the <strong>university</strong> enforcement of the alcohol<br />

policy.<br />

To lower distributive charges, o nly<br />

the bar itself and its immediate area<br />

will be considered part of the Pub<br />

beginning next year. The official size<br />

ec of the Pub will be reduced by 80 per-<br />

I cent<br />

| As a result, the distributive<br />

| charges, which arc based roughly on<br />

« the amount of the Pub floor space,<br />

| have been lowered from $13,221 this<br />

s 'year <strong>to</strong> $4,080 next year.<br />

Despite the changes in the floor<br />

space, the same alcohol restrictions<br />

will apply* No alcohol will be allowed<br />

beyond the basement of the Rice<br />

Memorial Center.<br />

<strong>Gillis</strong> said he would see how the<br />

new system works before considering<br />

waiving fees in future years.<br />

"1 mean <strong>to</strong> be supportive of the<br />

Pub," <strong>Gillis</strong> said. "I have read the report<br />

and have tried <strong>to</strong> respond positively."<br />

Arreola said, "If we have the same<br />

revenue as this year, we'll be able <strong>to</strong><br />

meet the costs [of distribution]."<br />

The committee presented two proposals<br />

<strong>to</strong> the president on Feb. l.The<br />

first proposal asked that the <strong>university</strong><br />

waive all distributive charges. The<br />

second asked <strong>to</strong> restructure the Pub<br />

floor space, which would reduce distributive<br />

charges.<br />

In a report presented <strong>to</strong> the president<br />

Feb. 1, the committee suggested<br />

opening a new entrance <strong>to</strong> the Pub<br />

from the under-utilized stairwell next<br />

<strong>to</strong> Sammy's and the Coffeehouse. The<br />

committee also suggested putting up<br />

a neon sign <strong>to</strong> attract cus<strong>to</strong>mers.<br />

<strong>Gillis</strong> rejected the idea of a neon<br />

sign and <strong>to</strong>ld the committee there was<br />

no money available for major renovations.<br />

But Associate Dean of Student Affairs<br />

and committee member Bob Sanborn<br />

said the Rice Memorial Center<br />

basement may be renovated later this<br />

summer or the beginning of the next<br />

academic year after the Marchi ng Owl<br />

Band moves in<strong>to</strong> the Central Kitchen<br />

basement<br />

The committee would also like <strong>to</strong><br />

have better lighting <strong>to</strong> make the l\ib<br />

moreconducive <strong>to</strong> studying and meeting.<br />

Other plans include adding a<br />

lounge for off-campus <strong>students</strong> with<br />

lockers and a refrigera<strong>to</strong>r.<br />

The Pub management is planning<br />

<strong>to</strong> replace some of the Pub furniture.<br />

The Pub is currently soliciting bids for<br />

the improvements.<br />

<strong>Gillis</strong> has asked the I\ib not <strong>to</strong><br />

encourage patrons from outside Rice.<br />

"The Pub is designed <strong>to</strong> support the<br />

interests of the <strong>students</strong>," he said.<br />

<strong>Gillis</strong> also requested that the Pub not<br />

advertise off campus.<br />

The only circumstances in which<br />

the Pub might be closed down by the<br />

<strong>university</strong> is if non-Rice patrons begin<br />

causing disturbances there, <strong>Gillis</strong> said.<br />

Pub staffers didn't have any definite<br />

plans <strong>to</strong> advertise off-campu s. "We<br />

have a strong enough base on-campus<br />

that we don't have <strong>to</strong> look off," l\i b<br />

officer Randy Block said.<br />

Willy's Pub is owned by V & W<br />

Permits, which also owns Valhalla. It<br />

is a non-profit company composed<br />

entirely of Rice <strong>students</strong> and faculty.<br />

The <strong>university</strong> is not legally responsible<br />

for any sale of alcohol on<br />

campus.<br />

Allegations prompt investigation<br />

By Lisa Ann Robertson<br />

Campus police continue <strong>to</strong> investigate<br />

charges that Sgt. Clarence<br />

Veltman manhandled a drunken student<br />

at Rondelet<br />

Will Rice College Master Dennis<br />

Shirley requested an investigation after<br />

several <strong>students</strong> <strong>to</strong>ld him they were<br />

concerned about Veltman's behavior<br />

when he transported a passed out Will<br />

Rice freshman from Rondelet <strong>to</strong> Park<br />

Plaza Hospital last month. ,<br />

An internal police investiga<strong>to</strong>r has<br />

interviewed the <strong>students</strong> and Veltman<br />

and is currently processing the information.<br />

The freshman involved in the situation<br />

has not pressed charges or requested<br />

an investigation. "I didn't file<br />

the complaint I think [my treatment]<br />

was justified.This is an issue between<br />

me, Officer Veltman, and thead ministration,"<br />

he said, requesting his name<br />

not be used.<br />

Will Rice junior David Maas and<br />

Sid Richardson College junior Thomas<br />

Fowlkes said they pressed for an<br />

investigation be<strong>cause</strong> as <strong>students</strong> they<br />

fear receiving such treatment themselves<br />

in the future.<br />

"When you call the police, you expect<br />

<strong>to</strong> get help," Maas said. "What we<br />

got wasn't necessarily help."<br />

Fowlkes agreed. "My biggest concern<br />

was for the kid's life. There is a<br />

risk of inducing vomiting and Sgt.<br />

Veltman showed no concern for the<br />

<strong>students</strong>. That incident gives a message<br />

<strong>to</strong> me that campos don't care<br />

about <strong>students</strong>.<br />

"Foraweekafterwards I didn't like<br />

the thought of having <strong>to</strong> call them if I<br />

needed help. They had proven themselves<br />

<strong>to</strong>tally incompetent I realize<br />

that's a generalization, but you judge<br />

an institution by its parts," Fowlkes<br />

said.<br />

Veltman declined <strong>to</strong> comment on<br />

the incident or the investigation and<br />

referred all questions <strong>to</strong> Police Chief<br />

Mary Voswinkel. Voswinkel did not<br />

return repeated phone calls from the<br />

IJtresher.Campus police policy prohibits<br />

any officer except Voswinkel <strong>to</strong><br />

answer questions about the department.<br />

staff members said.<br />

SPORTS<br />

SEE OFFICER PAGE t-<br />

Crazing <strong>to</strong><br />

theSWC<br />

crown<br />

11


2 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER OPINION<br />

An honest examination of Rice's<br />

<strong>security</strong> needs benifits all<br />

Recent crimes around the campus have raised great concern among<br />

the community about safety here at Rice. Despite these crimes, however,<br />

Rice has not suddenly become a more dangerous place, it is only<br />

that we finally bothered <strong>to</strong> notice.<br />

The administration and Campus Police have tried hard <strong>to</strong> suppress<br />

news of crime on campus, pretending that by ignoring crime it will go<br />

away, or at least that no one would notice.<br />

It is common knowledge that the Jones College parking lot is more<br />

dangerous than others, but little was done about it. In April 1993, the<br />

Thresherreporied four car thefts out of the Jones lot in one year (two from<br />

one person). Comments were made at the time about the lower level of<br />

safety in the Jones lot. But not much, if anything, wasdone, and certainly<br />

not enough was done.<br />

In the recent cases, the administration is so unwilling <strong>to</strong> give out<br />

information that it seems as if it is trying <strong>to</strong> hide the situation, a very<br />

dangerous attitude. The incident happened. Everyone knows it happened.<br />

People have the right <strong>to</strong> know what, if anything, is being done in<br />

reaction <strong>to</strong> it.<br />

But fault lies not only with the administration's reaction <strong>to</strong> the<br />

abductions.<br />

Students have also ignored the dangers that they face here at Rice,<br />

despite repeated warnings from multitudes of sources. By living here, or<br />

even just by living, one assumes a certain amount of risk of being a victim<br />

of violent crime. While this does<br />

On j n ; n n W notlessen the tragedy if one is struck<br />

by crime, itissomething<strong>to</strong>beaware<br />

n o ° f -<br />

- i-t Crime is a problem everywhere<br />

p* in this nation, not just in the inner<br />

5T cities of New York or I>os Angeles.<br />

Just be<strong>cause</strong> we happen <strong>to</strong> be <strong>students</strong><br />

at a <strong>university</strong> does not mean that we are less of a target than those<br />

who live outside the hedges. If anything, the tendency of young people<br />

<strong>to</strong> ignore personal safety makes <strong>students</strong> more likely <strong>to</strong> be targets. Also,<br />

being in the fourth largest city in the United States means that there are<br />

thousands of criminals out there who could easily choose <strong>to</strong> make Rice<br />

the site of future activity.<br />

Still, most <strong>students</strong> do not normally feel unsafe in the middle of<br />

campus, and so relax their guard <strong>to</strong> a much lower level than they might<br />

anywhere else. Perhaps before calling for fences <strong>to</strong> keep all of Hous<strong>to</strong>n<br />

out (and all of us in), we should reexamine our own expectations.<br />

Ult imately, however, even the best of care will not prevent all crime.<br />

Kven with four times as many Campus Police patrolling and giant brick<br />

walls and manned <strong>security</strong> gates, the abduction of five <strong>students</strong> over two<br />

clays still could have happened.<br />

I^ast week's incident proved that Rice isn't the safest place in the<br />

world, but <strong>students</strong> should not lose sight of the fact that it certainly is not<br />

one of the most dangerous. Crime is a significant concern at practically<br />

all universities in the nation.<br />

We can't deter all of those criminals, but we can at least make a strong<br />

effort.<br />

Rice<br />

This means The that the a<br />

Thresher<br />

| administration a I and <strong>students</strong> 1 must »incei»i« be more<br />

responsible when it comes <strong>to</strong> matters of <strong>security</strong>.<br />

Sei Chong<br />

Kate Hallgren<br />

Vivek Rao<br />

Chris<strong>to</strong>f Spieler<br />

Amy Jeter<br />

Joanna Winters<br />

Tony Tran<br />

Grant A. Flowers<br />

Peter S<strong>to</strong>kes<br />

Rachel Dornhelm<br />

Amy Ferranti<br />

Adam Richardson<br />

Bemie Yoo<br />

Charles Klein<br />

Haley S. Robertson<br />

David Hale<br />

Edi<strong>to</strong>r-in-Chief<br />

George E. Ha<strong>to</strong>un<br />

Business Manager<br />

News Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Asst. News Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Opinion Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Opinion Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Arts & Entertainment Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Asst. Arts& Entertainment Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Sports Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

AssL Sports Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Asst. Sports Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Features Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Backpage Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Backpage Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Pho<strong>to</strong>graphy Edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

IVoduction Manager<br />

Ads Manager<br />

The Rice Thresher, the official student newspaper at Rice University<br />

since 1916, is published each Eriday during the school year, except during<br />

examination periods and holidays, by the <strong>students</strong> of Rice University.<br />

Edi<strong>to</strong>rial and business offices arc located on the second floor of the Ijcy<br />

Student Center, P.O. Box 1892, Hous<strong>to</strong>n, Texas, 77251. Phone 527-4801. r<br />

Eax 285-5238. e-mail: thresher® riccvm 1 .ricc.edu. Advertising in formation 1 *<br />

availablcon request. Mail subscription rate per semester: $20.00 domestic,<br />

$40.00 international via first class mail. Non-subscription rate: first copy<br />

free, second copy $1.(X).<br />

Unsigned edi<strong>to</strong>rials represent the majority opinion of the Thresher<br />

Edi<strong>to</strong>rial Staff. All other pieces represent solely the opinion of the author.<br />

Obviously. © COPYRKyfr 1.994<br />

YBTANflmOF<br />

TEUEM&<br />

1QQ0QIKE&,,.<br />

IwtWWW WrWJ<br />

9<br />

rretWW<br />

WWif-fVE SEEN<br />

TOO MUCH SOWS<br />

ourtAreoNT/"<br />

Honor Code, Division I<br />

athletics not compatible<br />

To the edi<strong>to</strong>r:<br />

Ask yourselfi if you could make<br />

one change <strong>to</strong> this <strong>university</strong> <strong>to</strong> make<br />

it a better place, what would it be?<br />

After four years at Rice, my answer is<br />

clear: get rid of Division I athletics.<br />

The 1984 <strong>university</strong> self-study reported<br />

that over half of all Honor System<br />

violations are <strong>cause</strong>d by scholarship<br />

athletes, who comprise only about<br />

11 per cent of the student population.<br />

1 would hypothesize that the 1994 selfstudy<br />

will have similar results.<br />

' Don't you realize the<br />

sacrifice of academic<br />

integrity Division I<br />

athletics seems <strong>to</strong> <strong>cause</strong>?'<br />

A few years ago, there were rampant<br />

rumors that a large number of<br />

the accused in a 28-person conspiracy<br />

case were athletes. If these rumors<br />

were true, then the athletes should<br />

have been held responsible for their<br />

actions. However, these athletes aren't<br />

the only ones at fault, and I wish the<br />

Council would penalize everyone<br />

who's responsible for the athlete cheating<br />

problems we have had at Rice.<br />

Unfortunately, the Board of Governors<br />

cannot be given an F in the course<br />

and a two-semester suspension.<br />

The reason that so many athletes<br />

cheat is a simple one: many of them<br />

are not academically qualified <strong>to</strong> be at<br />

Rice. Even with majors like Human<br />

Performance and Managerial Studies,<br />

it appears <strong>to</strong> me that many athletes<br />

feel pressured <strong>to</strong> choose between<br />

cheating and failing. According <strong>to</strong> the<br />

1992 Athletic Review Committee report,<br />

in 1990-91 and 1991-92, halfofall<br />

entering athletes had SAT scores between<br />

700 and 1000. In 1991-92, no<br />

entering athlete had an SAT score<br />

above 1310. Generally, only abou<strong>to</strong>nefifth<br />

of Rice athletes are judged by the<br />

admissions office <strong>to</strong> have qualifications<br />

comparable <strong>to</strong> regularly admitted<br />

<strong>students</strong>.<br />

Of course, it is not the fault of the<br />

athletes that they have lower SAT<br />

scores than the average Rice student<br />

The fault lies with those people who<br />

admit athletes who are simply not<br />

academically qualified <strong>to</strong> be here. At<br />

Rice, scholarship athletes are admitted<br />

through the Athletic Department,<br />

not through the Admission Office. As<br />

a result, some of these athletes are not<br />

academically prepared enough <strong>to</strong> be<br />

at Rice, and they might feel pressure<br />

<strong>to</strong> cheat <strong>to</strong> get through.<br />

As a marshal for <strong>Gillis</strong>' inauguration,<br />

I had <strong>to</strong> -line up the Board of<br />

Governors. As they waited <strong>to</strong> walk on<br />

the stage, I listened <strong>to</strong> their conversation.<br />

Were they talking about <strong>Gillis</strong>'<br />

presidency? No. Were they talking<br />

about the academic future of Rice?<br />

No. They were talking about college<br />

football.<br />

rr 'sWTKt<br />

ttUUT" I'VE SEEN<br />

TOO MUCH CARELESS<br />

VmH&OHT/rfsNefltf<br />

MJSMVESEEN<br />

TOO MUCH NOT<br />

stuwin&CNTA<br />

rrsi<strong>to</strong>Htf<br />

SHUT- I'VE SEEM<br />

TOO MUCH<br />

CLUMSINESS ON<br />

SEE HONOR, PAGE 5<br />

We welcome short letters<br />

(150 words or less) on campus<br />

or national issues and on<br />

the Thresher itself sent <strong>to</strong>:<br />

Campus mail:<br />

Rice Thresher<br />

or<br />

thresher@owlnet<br />

for our information, please include<br />

a phone number. See the staff box for<br />

more information.<br />

product of a<br />

sick mind<br />

To the edi<strong>to</strong>r:<br />

Unfortunately — or probably fortunately<br />

— I don't know who Heath<br />

Scott is. "A Tribute <strong>to</strong> Heath Scott,"<br />

which appeared on the Backpage of<br />

the March 25 Thresher, is obviously<br />

the product of a sick mind. Why sick<br />

minds prompt their owners <strong>to</strong> write<br />

such vicious trash seems self-explana<strong>to</strong>ry.<br />

Why the Backpage Edi<strong>to</strong>r prints<br />

it is unfathomable.<br />

Graciela S. Daichman<br />

Dept. of Hispanic &<br />

Classical Studies<br />

and English Department<br />

Foundation revisions merit support<br />

To the edi<strong>to</strong>r.<br />

We wish <strong>to</strong> register our strong and<br />

enthusiastic support for the proposal<br />

by the Undergraduate Curriculum<br />

Committee regarding changes in the<br />

fou ndation course requirements. Th is<br />

proposal, unanimously endorsed by<br />

the committee after two years' study,<br />

will be voted on by the faculty next<br />

week.<br />

The current requirements grew<br />

out of a plan by former president<br />

George Rupp <strong>to</strong> inaugurate an interdisciplinary<br />

general education curriculum<br />

at Rice. Its purpose was <strong>to</strong> introduce<br />

<strong>students</strong> <strong>to</strong> a set of widely influential<br />

works in the humanities and <strong>to</strong><br />

basic theories in the natural and social<br />

sciences that would provide at least a<br />

modicum of intellectual coherence <strong>to</strong><br />

an increasingly diversified and specialized<br />

<strong>university</strong> curriculum.<br />

The humanities foundation<br />

courses, Humanities 101 and 102, have<br />

succeeded beyond everyone's initial<br />

hope and <strong>to</strong>day represent one of the<br />

most exciting ventures in general edu-<br />

cation we know of on an American<br />

campus. In order <strong>to</strong> keep HUMA 101<br />

and 102 intact, <strong>to</strong> develop other interdisciplinary<br />

courses outside the hu-<br />

The humanities<br />

foundation emirses...<br />

represent one of the most<br />

exciting ventures in<br />

general education we<br />

know of on an American<br />

campus. '<br />

manities, and <strong>to</strong> provide new and more<br />

satisfac<strong>to</strong>ry interdisciplinary courses<br />

outside the humanities, the Curriculum<br />

Committee has asked the faculty<br />

<strong>to</strong> approve the creation of a short list of<br />

courses from which <strong>students</strong> may<br />

chose, which would undoubtedly include<br />

Humanities 101 and 102 as well<br />

as certain departmental introduc<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

courses, and a few new ones yet <strong>to</strong> be<br />

developed in the humanities, social<br />

sciences and natural sciences.<br />

This strikes us as an eminently<br />

sound solution. It builds on thecourses<br />

that have proved <strong>to</strong> be highly successful,<br />

and it allows for the creation of<br />

others that will be significant improvementson<br />

theother foundation courses.<br />

In addition, it will for the first time<br />

allow <strong>students</strong> some choice ofgeneral<br />

education courses.<br />

None of us has taught in HUMA<br />

102 or 102, and we have no vested<br />

interest in ex<strong>to</strong>lling the extraordinary<br />

virtues of these courses — virtues<br />

that are corroborated by theverygood<br />

teaching evaluations they have received.<br />

All of us, though, believe in the<br />

philosophy behind a general education<br />

requirement We believe Human i-<br />

SEE COURSES, PAGE 5


OPINION THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY. APRIL 8, 1994 3<br />

Campus safety questioned in wake of Jones abductions<br />

Students must take action Crimes bring in<strong>security</strong>,<br />

hurt public perception<br />

To the edi<strong>to</strong>r:<br />

In discussing the kidnapping of<br />

the four Rice <strong>students</strong> and the rape of<br />

the female, a group of friends and I<br />

decided how lucky we were. We realized<br />

how lucky we were <strong>to</strong> be alive, <strong>to</strong><br />

be healthy, <strong>to</strong> be attending such a<br />

prestigious school, <strong>to</strong> be intelligent.<br />

It's wonderful how tragedy always<br />

seems <strong>to</strong> <strong>cause</strong> a person <strong>to</strong> re<strong>evaluate</strong><br />

his life and draws people <strong>to</strong>gether.<br />

6 Ourfriends were<br />

kidnapped. One friend<br />

was sexually abused. All of<br />

their lives were in danger.<br />

We're lucky that they are<br />

all still alive and that we<br />

can be there for them. '<br />

But can we rest on these laurels?<br />

Can we be satisfied knowing that we<br />

are lucky individuals for this brief<br />

moment? Is this good enough?<br />

We need <strong>to</strong> do something. Perhaps<br />

the magnitude of the problem of<br />

crime intimidates us or <strong>cause</strong>s us <strong>to</strong><br />

think, "God, what can little oP me do <strong>to</strong><br />

so Ive a problem that has plagued society<br />

for so long?" Perhaps it's the feeling<br />

of helplessness that we feel when<br />

we have <strong>to</strong> complete a seemingly impossible<br />

task. Butsomtf/Zj/w^has<strong>to</strong>be<br />

done. We can't let this heinous crime<br />

go without some response.<br />

Our friends were kidnapped. One<br />

friend was sexually abused. All of their<br />

lives were in danger. We're lucky that<br />

they are all still alive and that we can<br />

be there for them.<br />

We can't do anything about what<br />

happened <strong>to</strong> them. It's <strong>to</strong>o late for that.<br />

We just have <strong>to</strong> be there for them and<br />

give them support and, most of all,<br />

show them that we care. This is the<br />

time for friendship.<br />

But more importantly perhaps, this<br />

is the time for action. We can't let this<br />

happen again. Who will be next?<br />

Where will the next crime take place<br />

and what's going <strong>to</strong> happen? We were<br />

<strong>to</strong>o late <strong>to</strong> help the fourvictims, but we<br />

can't let it happen <strong>to</strong> anyone else.<br />

Before any seemingly impossible<br />

task may be completed, there needs<br />

<strong>to</strong>astart,afirststep. IVealways learned<br />

in math class that the first step <strong>to</strong> solve<br />

any word problem is <strong>to</strong> recognize the<br />

problem.<br />

I guess this is the easy step. Rice<br />

does have a problem with crime. Albeit<br />

a small one, it definitely exists. At<br />

*<br />

the Jones parking lot alone, several<br />

cars have been s<strong>to</strong>len, license plates<br />

s<strong>to</strong>len, and now this incident Book<br />

bags have been s<strong>to</strong>len in the colleges<br />

and random acts of violence do occur.<br />

It's the next step that is the hardest<br />

part. We have <strong>to</strong> decide on how we're<br />

going <strong>to</strong> solve the problem. We need<br />

a course of action as <strong>to</strong> how we can<br />

curtail the crime problem at Rice, if<br />

not rid ourselves of it entirely. But we<br />

need <strong>to</strong> do something, although the<br />

task seems quite daunting. Not just<br />

for them, but for all of us, for who<br />

knows who can be next?<br />

This is not a letter <strong>to</strong> complain<br />

about the problems; they're pretty apparent<br />

It's a call <strong>to</strong> action, asking<br />

<strong>students</strong> <strong>to</strong> do whatever they can <strong>to</strong><br />

make sure people can feel safe on our<br />

campus, <strong>to</strong> ensure that every time<br />

someone goes <strong>to</strong> his/her car, he/she<br />

can walk with the confidence that nothing<br />

will happen <strong>to</strong> him/her.<br />

So what can you do <strong>to</strong> help? I don't<br />

know. It depends on how much time<br />

and effort you 're willing <strong>to</strong> put in<strong>to</strong> the<br />

situation.<br />

You can talk <strong>to</strong> your SA Sena<strong>to</strong>r<br />

about getting the administration <strong>to</strong><br />

add extra lighting <strong>to</strong> the parking lots<br />

around the <strong>university</strong>. You could go<br />

straight <strong>to</strong> the administration. You<br />

can write <strong>to</strong> our local Congressman,<br />

Mike Andrews, asking him for <strong>to</strong>ugher<br />

gun laws. You can get involved in<br />

Head Start programs <strong>to</strong> help underprivileged<br />

youths. You can write <strong>to</strong><br />

the media about how they covered the<br />

.entire incident<br />

You can propose some measure<br />

which could help solve the problem<br />

here at Rice. You can get involved in<br />

programs around the campus, such<br />

as SOAR (Students Organized Against<br />

Rape),CAPP (Co liege Assistance Peer<br />

Program) or RSVP (Rice Student Volunteer<br />

Program), designed <strong>to</strong> help<br />

other <strong>students</strong> or people in the community<br />

who aren't as "lucky" as we<br />

are. You can be a leader, inspiring<br />

others <strong>to</strong> action. Or you can do the<br />

blue collar work, doing whatever it<br />

takes <strong>to</strong> ensure that this doesn't happen<br />

again.<br />

But please, do something. We can't<br />

let this incident pass without some<br />

kind of reaction.<br />

We're scared; we're angry; but we<br />

can't let these feelings s<strong>to</strong>p us from<br />

doing what needs <strong>to</strong> be done. We have<br />

<strong>to</strong> face our fears, concerns andanger<br />

by doing what we have <strong>to</strong> in order <strong>to</strong><br />

ensure that it doesn't happen again.<br />

We're not that apathetic, are we? We<br />

do care, don't we?<br />

These are our friends. Don't let<br />

any more friends get hurt. Maybe<br />

they won't come back next time. Or<br />

maybe it'll be you.<br />

PAY FOR<br />

MEDICAL<br />

SCHOOL.<br />

Today's Air Force offers a<br />

scholarship program that can<br />

help pay the cost of medical<br />

school. If selected, you can continue<br />

your present studies — and<br />

s<strong>to</strong>p worrying about how <strong>to</strong> pay<br />

for them. Participation is based on<br />

competitive selection. For information<br />

with no obligation, talk <strong>to</strong> an<br />

Air Force representative. Call<br />

AIR FORCE OPPORTUNITIES<br />

TOLL FREE<br />

1-800-423-USAF<br />

Tony Trail<br />

WRC'96<br />

To the edi<strong>to</strong>r.<br />

1 am concerned about recent<br />

crimes on the Rice campus. On<br />

Mar. 29, after midnight, a<br />

postdoc<strong>to</strong>ral fellow from my labora<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

was approached by a man<br />

with a gun on a campus lot and<br />

forced <strong>to</strong> withdraw $400 from an<br />

ATM. Although he was not<br />

harmed, the potential danger was<br />

great indeed, as we have seen<br />

from recent cases elsewhere.<br />

Imagine the fear that this young<br />

man, who is from a foreign country,<br />

must have felt<br />

Late Wednesday night a much<br />

worse incident occurred [at Jones<br />

College.] In view of the similarity<br />

between these incidents, I speculate<br />

that one of the criminals was<br />

involved in both crimes. He may<br />

well have been impressed at how<br />

easy it was <strong>to</strong> enter our campus<br />

and gain $400 in one evening's<br />

work, so he brought a friend <strong>to</strong><br />

Rice for a second try. Perhaps we<br />

shall be hearing from these guys<br />

again. I wonder <strong>to</strong> what extent <strong>security</strong><br />

was tightened based on the<br />

report given by my postdoc<strong>to</strong>ral<br />

fellow before this more serious<br />

crime occurred.<br />

Campus crime has at least two<br />

effects. It makes us insecure and it<br />

creates terribly damaging publicity.<br />

When we recruit <strong>students</strong>, we'd<br />

like <strong>to</strong> tell them that Rice is a safe<br />

place. How can we do so in light of<br />

these recent incidents?<br />

What can we do abou t crime on<br />

campus? Long range social programs<br />

are certainly important<br />

However, we need an immediate<br />

SEE POSTDOC, PAGE 5<br />

Physical modifications<br />

needed for safe campus<br />

To the edi<strong>to</strong>r<br />

The recent attacks on <strong>students</strong> at<br />

Rice have made most of us wonder<br />

what can be done <strong>to</strong> prevent such<br />

atrocities from recurring. I do not claim<br />

<strong>to</strong> be an expert on matters of <strong>security</strong><br />

and crime prevention, but I have studied<br />

matters of this type in depth in<br />

recent months as part of my senior<br />

thesis, and I believe there are things<br />

the administration can do <strong>to</strong> make this<br />

campus safer, in terms of its physical<br />

layout<br />

While it is true that there is no<br />

foolproof defense againstadetermined<br />

criminal, there are measures the <strong>university</strong><br />

can take, measures which have<br />

been proven <strong>to</strong> work elsewhere.<br />

What's more, making the physical layout<br />

more secure also takes in<strong>to</strong> account<br />

the fact that the campus police<br />

cannot be everywhere at once.<br />

Most criminals strike where it is<br />

convenient for them, and this convenience<br />

is based mostly on ease of<br />

entrance and escape, and the number<br />

of hiding places. Criminals generally<br />

do not strike where they think they<br />

will easily be seen or will have a <strong>to</strong>ugh<br />

_ time getting in and out Quite simply,<br />

Rice is <strong>to</strong>o easy <strong>to</strong> enter and leave<br />

unnoticed, and has <strong>to</strong>o many places<br />

for would-be offenders <strong>to</strong> hide. Rice<br />

should take the following steps, all of<br />

which are relatively inexpensive and<br />

not particularly complex, in order <strong>to</strong><br />

. Improve safety at the campus.<br />

The first step is obvious. Floodlights<br />

need <strong>to</strong> be placed in dark areas<br />

all over the <strong>university</strong>, especially<br />

around high traffic areas like the colleges<br />

and Mudd Lab, and excessively<br />

thick foliage should be trimmed. This<br />

would dramatically lower the ability of<br />

criminals <strong>to</strong> hide undetected. Next,<br />

mos<strong>to</strong>fthe entry points at Rice should<br />

have gates placed at them (if they do<br />

not already), and those gates should<br />

be shut and locked at nightfall.<br />

SEE SECURITY, PAGE 5<br />

Fences are<br />

no solution<br />

Chris<strong>to</strong>f<br />

Spieler<br />

Calls for chain link fences, gates<br />

and bright lighting are understandable<br />

and quite rational in the wake of<br />

last week's abduction/rape at Jones.<br />

It saddens me <strong>to</strong> think, though, that<br />

the only way we can be safe is by<br />

locking ourselves behind protective<br />

walls.<br />

If Rice moves <strong>to</strong> a sealed campus,<br />

it will be part of a widespread trend.<br />

Increasingly, apartment complexes,<br />

office parks<br />

Edi<strong>to</strong>r's ' and subdivi sions are be- -<br />

Notes<br />

ing gated off.<br />

Where once<br />

life was centered<br />

around pu blic spaces open <strong>to</strong> all,<br />

it is starting <strong>to</strong> be partitioned off in<strong>to</strong><br />

private enclaves.<br />

This may make life safer for those<br />

within, but society suffers. The first<br />

thing <strong>to</strong> go is a sense of community.<br />

What do the residents of one apartment<br />

complex now have in common<br />

with those in an almost identical compound<br />

nextdoor?Only streets in which<br />

everyone remains cloistered in their<br />

own car.<br />

When we physically separate ourselves<br />

from the outside world, we feel<br />

like we are no longer a part of it, like its<br />

problems are no<strong>to</strong>ur problems. Now<br />

that our home is a fortress, what does<br />

it matter <strong>to</strong> us that other people are<br />

being robbed or murdered? We're safe<br />

behind our gates, and we feel no responsibility<br />

for what it is like outside<br />

them.<br />

1 may well be accused of exaggeration.<br />

No, we will not turn Hous<strong>to</strong>n in<strong>to</strong><br />

(k>tham City by restricting nightime<br />

vehicle access, but we must remember<br />

as we try <strong>to</strong> deal with the problem<br />

of crime within the hedges that barbed<br />

wire and fences are not a solution. In<br />

the short run, they will make campus<br />

safer. But society's problems will only<br />

escalate.<br />

Chris<strong>to</strong>f Spieler, along with VivekRao,<br />

is in his first week as Opinion Edi<strong>to</strong>r.<br />

Student Awards Barbecue<br />

Saturday, April 16, 1994<br />

4:30 p.m.<br />

Engineering Quadrangle<br />

All junior and senior engineering <strong>students</strong> and<br />

faculty are invited.<br />

Short awards presentation at 5:30 p.m.<br />

Rain site: ME cloisters.


4 FRIDAY. APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER OPINION<br />

Playing by new rules would return excitement <strong>to</strong> sports<br />

Jym<br />

Schwartz<br />

1 suggest those of you with weak<br />

hearts should look away now, for I am<br />

about <strong>to</strong> commit blasphemy on a national<br />

scale. It will not be pretty, and I<br />

intend <strong>to</strong> spare no one, so those of you<br />

who intend <strong>to</strong> continue should sit<br />

down.<br />

The vast majority of televised sports<br />

in this country are boring and largely<br />

pointless.<br />

There, I've said it, and most of you<br />

are probably in shock. "What's up his<br />

butt?" you're probably asking yourself.<br />

Well, it's a redwood forest if you<br />

must know, which is why I keep show-<br />

ing up in the paper. But this does not<br />

excuse my sacrilegious position on<br />

the American Sporting Industry.<br />

After all, what could I have against<br />

sports? That which happens in the<br />

fields of play is nothing short of magic:<br />

although all religions hate each other<br />

and any race will slit another's collective<br />

throat before making peace, they<br />

will all sit down <strong>to</strong> watch a basketball<br />

game.<br />

What could be wrong with that?<br />

It's entertainment, and it makes good<br />

ncighborsou<strong>to</strong>fpeopleforafew hours,<br />

after which they go out and smash in<br />

the windshield of your car be<strong>cause</strong><br />

their team won the Super Bowl.<br />

(Which is better than doing it be<strong>cause</strong><br />

their team lost.)<br />

In my own personal experience,<br />

people who make such broad state-<br />

ments as the one I have made do so<br />

based on their own ignorance. Do not<br />

be fooled, for I am not one of these<br />

people. If youVe ever worn a pair of<br />

Chuck Taylor's in your life and don't<br />

know what team he played for, then<br />

I've got a leg up on you. (He played for<br />

the Akron Fires<strong>to</strong>nes during the<br />

1920s.)<br />

The essence of what's wrong with<br />

these sports lies in the lack of variation,<br />

strategy and surprise. Once a<br />

person is over seven feet tall, putting<br />

the ball through a basket becomes a<br />

rather simple procedure .hardly worth<br />

the fanfare it receives. And when the<br />

final score is 113 <strong>to</strong> 116, you wonder if<br />

maybe there isn't something a bit pointless<br />

about the whole affair.<br />

Even if you don't agree with me on<br />

this (perhaps you see the artistry in<br />

each individual move, like my office<br />

mate), you may find the future of televised<br />

sports <strong>to</strong> be a venue you never<br />

could have imagined.<br />

• Basketball: The entire floor of the<br />

court will be zoned for points, with<br />

increasing value further from the basket<br />

For example, a shot from basket<br />

<strong>to</strong> basket will be worth 10 points. This<br />

would not only alter strategy, but the<br />

last ten seconds of every game would<br />

be extremely intense. I am also considering<br />

a "one concealed weapon per<br />

team" rule.<br />

• Baseball: The basic problem here<br />

involves the lack of potential for bodily<br />

injury. It should be not only valid, but<br />

desirable, <strong>to</strong> aim for the pitcher when<br />

batting. In fact, any action which renders<br />

the pitcher unconscious will result<br />

in au<strong>to</strong>matic runs for the batter<br />

and anyone on base.<br />

I've noticed pinball is improved by<br />

an occasional extra ball, and I think<br />

baseball could likewise benefit In order<br />

<strong>to</strong> offset this addition, players<br />

would also be allowed <strong>to</strong> destroy balls<br />

in play. This, naturally, requires at<br />

The Owls<br />

are Coming<br />

For more information<br />

about hosting or<br />

volunteering:<br />

• See your SAC<br />

College Contact<br />

Baker: Ian DeBoer<br />

Brown: Tony Kim<br />

Hanszen: Courtney Cook<br />

Jones: Juiie Markwardt<br />

Lovett: Gary Doughty<br />

Sid Rich: Neely Kaydos<br />

Weiss: Marissa Weitzner<br />

Will Rice: Deborah Lutes<br />

i<br />

least one concealed weapon per team.<br />

• Football: The best idea here is <strong>to</strong><br />

simply throw out the rules entirely,<br />

but only for short periods of time.<br />

At some random moment during a<br />

game (at least once every game) a<br />

horn will sound. For the next three<br />

minutes, the rules cease <strong>to</strong> exist aside<br />

from scoring via carrying a ball in<strong>to</strong><br />

the end zone and propelling the ball<br />

through the goal posts. Any and every<br />

method <strong>to</strong> achieve this end will be<br />

acceptable. This includes as many<br />

concealed weapons as the team deems<br />

necessary.<br />

• Ice Hockey: I have no beef with<br />

' Baseball: The basic<br />

problem here involves the<br />

lack of potential for bodily<br />

injury. It should be not<br />

only valid, but desirable,<br />

<strong>to</strong> aim for the pitcher when<br />

batting. '<br />

hockey since sticks rule out the need<br />

for concealed weapons, although I<br />

think it would be funny <strong>to</strong> pick a random<br />

fan from each side and put him or<br />

heron the ice with the rest of the team.<br />

• Golf: Exploding balls, mobile holes<br />

and lethal hazards. (This will also<br />

shorten the Seniors Circuit)<br />

• Bowling: Hopeless. Will die a lingering<br />

death within 60 years.<br />

• Soccer One of the better sports,<br />

butthe fans really want <strong>to</strong> be involved.<br />

I Lmagineagame between 4,(XX) people<br />

Q<br />

OWL DAY<br />

1 9 9 4<br />

T U D E N T A D M 1 S S I O N c 0 U N C I L<br />

with the goals set three miles apart<br />

That ought <strong>to</strong> make 'em happy.<br />

Of course, these are only suggestions<br />

and may never come <strong>to</strong> pass.<br />

After all, they'll probably have concealed<br />

weapons in soccer before anything<br />

else.<br />

Tempora Bona Volvant and if you<br />

don't wanna play my way I'll just take<br />

my ball and go home. (So nyah.)<br />

Jym Schwartz is a second-year graduate<br />

student in the Department of Geology<br />

and Geophysics.<br />

Relocating <strong>to</strong> Woodlands<br />

would end crime problem<br />

Chris<br />

Thomas<br />

"It'll never happen <strong>to</strong> me." That's<br />

what people always say before disaster<br />

strikes. Well, in consideration of<br />

the recent spate of crimes that plagued<br />

the campus over the Easter break,<br />

that saying is no longer true for <strong>students</strong><br />

at Rice.<br />

It has been shown recently that<br />

network television news programs<br />

have nearly doubled their reporting of<br />

violent crime across the cou ntry, hopefully<br />

<strong>to</strong> rally citizens <strong>to</strong> do something<br />

about crime. It doesn't matter that<br />

crime levels nationwide have kept<br />

steady for the past few years, or that<br />

rates of violent crime in Hous<strong>to</strong>n have<br />

actually dropped, thanks in part <strong>to</strong> the<br />

efforts of Mayor Lanier <strong>to</strong> place more<br />

police on the streets.<br />

All statistics can be thrown out the<br />

door when fate has crystallized events<br />

around you and made you the victim.<br />

The dice fell the wrong.way. Direct<br />

and indirect victimization can make<br />

people irrational about the subject<br />

No, reality for most people is welded<br />

in<strong>to</strong> a "see, here, now" attitude. Things<br />

become more real the closer they are<br />

in our spatial and temporal frame of<br />

reference.<br />

Rape and robbery are pretty abstract<br />

things when you live behind the<br />

hedges. However, when you are the<br />

one that gets accosted, you get pretty<br />

shaken up. When you don't carry<br />

around a cash card or other forms of<br />

money, you wind up perpetuating the<br />

situation that has made you and everybody<br />

else that you know a victim.<br />

Take one thing <strong>to</strong> heart: the one<br />

thing that we absolutely must do is<br />

prevent ourselves from becoming permanently<br />

victimized and scarred by<br />

such events.<br />

In that light, I would like <strong>to</strong> present<br />

a few suggestions about what might<br />

be done <strong>to</strong> help keep Rice a safe environment<br />

Considering my his<strong>to</strong>ry of<br />

having preference for more <strong>to</strong>nguein-cheek<br />

proposals, I will order these<br />

suggestions from most facetious <strong>to</strong><br />

most sincere:<br />

• Sell all properties in the local area<br />

and relocate Rice <strong>to</strong> a spot further out<br />

— maybe the Woodlands. The precedent<br />

for placing the campus out in the<br />

boonies is a sound one: buy cheap<br />

land far outside the city, and by the<br />

time expansion comes again, land values<br />

will have risen, yielding a significant<br />

increase in endowment size.<br />

EDGE<br />

• Consider surrounding the hedges<br />

with a 15-foot hurricane fence <strong>to</strong>pped<br />

with razor wire. The department of<br />

biosciences could breed large, ferocious,<br />

hunter-killer dogs sensitive <strong>to</strong><br />

that particular scent, crack-tainted<br />

sweat<br />

• Campus police could man particularly<br />

dangerous places 24-hours a day.<br />

Jones has been a convenient spot for<br />

criminals (especially car thieves) in<br />

the past, and all signs suggest that it<br />

will remain a favorite for baddies in<br />

the future.<br />

• Considerremovingtheprohibition<br />

on <strong>students</strong> keepinggunson campus.<br />

This policy, if criminals become aware<br />

of it (since most universities have similar<br />

policies, they probably are), gives<br />

them a reason <strong>to</strong> prefer robbing us<br />

instead of somebody that might be<br />

carrying a gun.<br />

If the campus police are afraid that<br />

<strong>students</strong> with guns is dangerous, they<br />

might consider several things: providing<br />

a gun safety course (something<br />

Jones College could sponsor, considering)<br />

and strictly enforcing the prohibition<br />

of firearms in the Pub or<br />

Valhalla or at any college party would<br />

greatly reduce the possibility of accidental<br />

shootings. Opening up this<br />

policy would allow for yet another<br />

option ...<br />

• Creating a student volunteer <strong>security</strong><br />

detail. A militia of sorts could be<br />

SEE MILITIA, PAGE 5<br />

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OPINION THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY, APRIL 8. 1994 5<br />

Honor<br />

FROM PAGE 2<br />

I wanted <strong>to</strong> say <strong>to</strong> them: dont you<br />

realize what you're doing <strong>to</strong> Rice acar<br />

demically? Don't you realize that the<br />

timecommittments placed on athletes<br />

would strain even the most prepared<br />

student? Don't you realize the sacrifice<br />

of academic integrity Division I<br />

Courses<br />

FROM PAGE 2<br />

ties 101 and 102, whose more than<br />

thirty teachers include several winners<br />

of <strong>university</strong>wide teaching<br />

awards, are models of interdisciplinary<br />

general education courses which<br />

the new courses can look <strong>to</strong> as a standard<br />

of success.<br />

We sincerely hope that our colleagues<br />

will join with us in giving<br />

strong support <strong>to</strong> the Undergraduate<br />

Curriculum Committee's proposal at<br />

next Tuesday's faculty meeting.<br />

Militia<br />

FROM PAGE 4<br />

Chandler Davidson<br />

Professor, Sociology<br />

Richard Smith<br />

Professor, His<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

Allen Matusow<br />

Dean of Humanities<br />

Professor, His<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

set up, in cooperation with the campus<br />

police, enabling troublesome<br />

places <strong>to</strong> be patrolled by <strong>students</strong><br />

armed with radios and possibly weapons.<br />

The radios would allow prompt<br />

reporting of situations <strong>to</strong> the police;<br />

weapons might save a situation that<br />

had gone <strong>to</strong>o far.<br />

• Instead of placing <strong>students</strong> in the<br />

position of risking their lives for freedom,<br />

peace and prosperity, colleges<br />

that feel that the campus police aren't<br />

doing their proper duty <strong>to</strong> protect the<br />

<strong>students</strong> should hire outside <strong>security</strong><br />

personnel <strong>to</strong> patrol the areas in question.<br />

The bill could be submitted <strong>to</strong><br />

the Administration, and any refusal<br />

on their part <strong>to</strong> pay for added <strong>security</strong><br />

athletics seems <strong>to</strong> <strong>cause</strong>?<br />

Unfortunately, they refuse <strong>to</strong> realize<br />

these facts. One can only hope,<br />

now that our athletic department will<br />

not longer be able <strong>to</strong> play UTs and<br />

A&M's athletic departments, the<br />

Board of Governors will decide that<br />

Division I athletics is no longer needed<br />

at Rice.<br />

There is a place for athletics at<br />

Rice. However, the people who par-<br />

Walter Isle<br />

Professor, English<br />

Edward Dough tie<br />

Professor, English<br />

Susan Wood<br />

Professor, English<br />

Stephen Baker<br />

Professor, Physics<br />

John Boles<br />

Professor, His<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

King Walters<br />

Professor, Physics<br />

Ira G ruber<br />

Professor, His<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

Stephen Tyler<br />

Professor, Anthropology<br />

Bernard Aresu<br />

French Studies<br />

would surely fac<strong>to</strong>r in<strong>to</strong> any class action<br />

suit filed accusing the <strong>university</strong><br />

of failure <strong>to</strong> provide adequate <strong>security</strong><br />

on campus...<br />

Something must be done <strong>to</strong> prevent"card-jacking"inthefuture.<br />

Banks<br />

must work harder <strong>to</strong> provide safe and<br />

secure facilities for cash withdrawals,<br />

providing better <strong>security</strong> in order <strong>to</strong><br />

prevent somebody from being forced<br />

at gun point <strong>to</strong> remove money.<br />

Wemighthopeforaworld in which<br />

money is not an issue. Remove the<br />

desire of someone for wealth, and the<br />

world is one step closer <strong>to</strong> heaven.<br />

Now, if you have any ideas of how <strong>to</strong><br />

accomplish this, call me and we can<br />

work on the other six deadly sins.<br />

Chris Thomas is a Sid Richardson<br />

College senior.<br />

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ticipate must be academically qualified<br />

<strong>to</strong> be here. This seems <strong>to</strong> be such<br />

an innocuous claim, but the Board of<br />

Governors and the athletic department<br />

are unwilling <strong>to</strong> believe it Until Rice<br />

gets rid of Division I athletics, there<br />

will continue <strong>to</strong> be academic problems<br />

with athletes.<br />

Postdoc<br />

FROM PAGE 3<br />

Bradley Mon<strong>to</strong>n<br />

Jones '94<br />

Rice response. We should improve<br />

campus lighting*, we should be aware<br />

of our surroundings and should not<br />

walk alone. I propose two additional<br />

measures. The first is increasing the<br />

presenceofthecampuspolice. I would<br />

like <strong>to</strong> see them patrolling the campus<br />

very often at n ight and s<strong>to</strong>pping people<br />

at random <strong>to</strong> check I.D's. The word<br />

will get out that Rice is careful about<br />

<strong>security</strong>, just as it has in West University<br />

Place. The second is <strong>to</strong> demonstrate<br />

our outrage by ensuring that<br />

when the present crimi rials are caught,<br />

they receive the minimum sentence<br />

with no parole. This may be accomplished<br />

by writing <strong>to</strong> the judge in the<br />

case and <strong>to</strong> the Hous<strong>to</strong>n newspapers.<br />

1 believe that the Rice community<br />

should present a unified front and<br />

serve notice <strong>to</strong> future criminals that<br />

we are not going <strong>to</strong> put up with crime<br />

on campus.<br />

When Rice was built, an open campus<br />

was no problem; besides, an open<br />

campus presents a nice image <strong>to</strong> the<br />

Hous<strong>to</strong>n community. Be<strong>cause</strong> of<br />

crime, we must now consider closing<br />

the campus. Three miles of fence and<br />

electronic accessgates would create a<br />

huge nuisance <strong>to</strong> everyone here,<br />

would drastically alter our image and<br />

would cost a fortune. If the problems<br />

get worse, though, we'll have <strong>to</strong> face<br />

this possibility.<br />

Paul Engel<br />

Professor, Chemistry<br />

Internships<br />

Security<br />

FROM PAGE 3<br />

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accepting applications for Internships in<br />

the following departments:<br />

• Finance<br />

• Food Service<br />

• Human Resources<br />

• Retail Merchandising<br />

• Revenue Processing<br />

• Risk Management<br />

• Security<br />

Intern applicants should be able <strong>to</strong> work<br />

full-time during the summer, including<br />

weekends. Apply in person through April<br />

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Revenue Control<br />

Agents<br />

Revenue Control involves au<strong>to</strong>mated<br />

balancing of accounts, auditing tills and<br />

providing accounting support <strong>to</strong> the<br />

revenue departments.<br />

Applicants should be able <strong>to</strong> work<br />

weekends now and full-time in the<br />

summer. Starting pay up <strong>to</strong> $5.25 an<br />

hour.<br />

There is no reason for interconnected<br />

parking lots (such as those<br />

facing the Medical Center) <strong>to</strong> have a<br />

whole host of entry and exit points<br />

through which offenders in cars can<br />

come in and out easily. Forcing traffic<br />

through such choke points may be a<br />

bit of an inconvenience, but it will<br />

make it easier <strong>to</strong> moni<strong>to</strong>r who comes<br />

in and out of the <strong>university</strong>.<br />

More emergency call boxes should<br />

be set up as well. Sirens and noise<br />

attract attention that criminals would<br />

rather avoid (such is the logic of car<br />

and burglar alarms), and would provide<br />

more opportu nities for rapid contact<br />

with the campus police in the<br />

event of an emergency.<br />

All of these measures can be<br />

achieved merely by expanding what<br />

we already have here at Rice in the<br />

way of <strong>security</strong> planning.<br />

The next steps are a bit more costly,<br />

but I believe they <strong>to</strong>o must be done. A<br />

chain-link fence should be built inside<br />

the hedges. Such a fence already exists<br />

on some parts of campus, such as<br />

the area near the baseball field and the<br />

media center. This fence would make<br />

life more difficult for criminals on foot<br />

(such as those who attacked the <strong>students</strong><br />

at Jones), and placing the fence<br />

inside the hedges would, frankly, be<br />

more attractive than a fence on the<br />

street side of the hedges (the fence<br />

near the baseball field can hardly be<br />

seen unless one looks closely).<br />

If Rice wants <strong>to</strong> be really ambitious,<br />

<strong>security</strong> cameras such as those<br />

commonly used in convenience s<strong>to</strong>res<br />

and large parking lots cou Id be placed<br />

at the traffic choke points if all-night<br />

manned guards prove infeasible.<br />

limited access gates controlled<br />

by magnetic cards or punchcodes,<br />

such as those used at the Graduate<br />

House and many apartment complexes,<br />

could also be set up as a longterm<br />

solution, coupled with more connections<br />

between the inner loop and<br />

the parking lots. Again, the more interconnection<br />

there is between the<br />

lots, the less the need for individual<br />

entrances in<strong>to</strong> isolated lots.<br />

All of the steps I am suggesting<br />

have been set up at many residential<br />

universities all over the country. For<br />

example, a friend of mine has informed<br />

me that Bos<strong>to</strong>n College is sealed after<br />

dark except for one or two moni<strong>to</strong>red<br />

entry/exit points. For that matter,<br />

many of the off-campus apartment<br />

complexes where <strong>students</strong> from Rice<br />

live have such <strong>security</strong> arrangements<br />

in one form or another.<br />

The steps I am suggesting will not<br />

absolutely eliminate the possibility of<br />

victimization by criminals, but as I<br />

previously stated, nothing can. However,<br />

by'making life more difficult on<br />

would-be offenders, it is likely that at<br />

6 A chain-link fence<br />

should be built inside the<br />

hedges. '<br />

the very least, the lesser offenses,<br />

which are more common than — and<br />

often precede — more gravely serious<br />

crimes, can be prevented. As a<br />

ru le, criminals go <strong>to</strong> places where they<br />

seethatthecommunity isunwillingor<br />

unable <strong>to</strong> preventeven minor offenses.<br />

Rice has the money <strong>to</strong> do at least<br />

some, if not all, of the things I am<br />

talking about. The price is a pittance<br />

compared <strong>to</strong> the building of a nanotech<br />

center, and the inconveniences are<br />

more than made up for by the increased<br />

safety.<br />

The only question is whether or<br />

not we have the will <strong>to</strong> do what is<br />

needed <strong>to</strong> make the campus safer for<br />

all who live and work here.<br />

Mark R. Yzaguirre<br />

WRC '94<br />

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H O U S T O N


6 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER NEWS<br />

Debate<br />

FROM PAGE 1<br />

preliminary rounds.<br />

Both freshmen also placed individually<br />

among the <strong>to</strong>p 20 speakers in<br />

the country.<br />

At the world <strong>to</strong>urnament, the Wee<br />

duo will compete with nine others<br />

from the United States and 250 teams<br />

from more than 47 countries. It will be<br />

held at Prince<strong>to</strong>n University in January.<br />

While neither team member<br />

wanted <strong>to</strong> set his hopes <strong>to</strong>o high,<br />

Daniel West, speech and debate team<br />

direc<strong>to</strong>r, said a good deal of practice in<br />

several <strong>to</strong>urnaments between now and<br />

January will prepare the <strong>students</strong> <strong>to</strong><br />

perform at the <strong>to</strong>p of their abilities.<br />

"1 f we work hard I don't see why we<br />

can't do well. But as freshmen there's<br />

so much we haven't learned,'' Ruthfield<br />

said. This year even if we don't do<br />

well it will still be a good learning<br />

experience."<br />

Ruthfield attributed their success<br />

<strong>to</strong> their different speaking styles and<br />

backgrounds, which gives the team<br />

an edge in a battle of quick wits.<br />

Parliamentary is a specific style of<br />

debate based on that of most European<br />

countries. In competition, each<br />

team represents either the government<br />

or the opposition in debating a<br />

GSA Business<br />

particular issue, which may be political<br />

or philosophical in nature.<br />

With little time <strong>to</strong> think and much<br />

<strong>to</strong> say, Ruthfield said the event is often<br />

"mentally exhausting and frenetic."<br />

Both teams are given only about 10<br />

minutes before the 40-minute debate<br />

<strong>to</strong> prepare arguments <strong>to</strong> win over<br />

judges.<br />

And despite its rather stuffy-sou nding<br />

name, Ijevy said, parliamentary<br />

debate is usually far from dull.<br />

Teams are encouraged <strong>to</strong> heckle<br />

each other, often resulting in dramatic<br />

yelling and table-rapping from both<br />

sides. Humor also plays an important<br />

part in the competition, which<br />

Ruthfield described as "40 minutes of<br />

craziness."<br />

The goal is <strong>to</strong> win the hearts and<br />

minds of the audience over <strong>to</strong> your<br />

position.<br />

Being s<strong>to</strong>dgy doesn't win hearts<br />

and minds," he said. "Unfortunately,<br />

we're not a very funny team. Butwe're<br />

working in it"<br />

Levy said he hopes <strong>to</strong> learn enough<br />

from debating other good teams over<br />

the next year <strong>to</strong> finish first in the 1995<br />

national <strong>to</strong>urnament, and Ruthfield<br />

said he hopes the freshman team's<br />

recent success will draw more Rice<br />

<strong>students</strong> <strong>to</strong> future parliamentary debate<br />

<strong>to</strong>urnaments.<br />

But for now the speech and debate<br />

team is gearing up for the American<br />

Forensics Association's National<br />

Speech Tournament <strong>to</strong> be held at<br />

Wichita State University April 9 <strong>to</strong> 11.<br />

Nine <strong>students</strong> have qualified for<br />

the <strong>to</strong>urnament at earlier competitions<br />

in 21 events which include persuasive,<br />

extemporaneou s and impromptu<br />

speech, as well as communication<br />

analysis.<br />

Of these nine <strong>students</strong>, four are<br />

first-year members.<br />

Baker College senior Peter Johnson<br />

said Rice has more novices going<br />

<strong>to</strong> the national <strong>to</strong>urnament than it has<br />

had in three years. Many members<br />

said the first-year members are one of<br />

the team's greatest assets.<br />

"I think that shows continued success,"<br />

West said. "I'mgraduating four<br />

people but gaining four good new<br />

people — I've got a lot <strong>to</strong> build on."<br />

"If we continue <strong>to</strong> recruit the same<br />

number of people every year that we<br />

lose, we're going <strong>to</strong> have a very strong<br />

team," he said.<br />

Rice speakers will compete with<br />

more than 400 <strong>students</strong> from about<br />

120 schools across the nation.<br />

West said the team hopes <strong>to</strong> improve<br />

on the 14th place ranking it<br />

received last year when the <strong>to</strong>urnament<br />

was held here.<br />

Johnson said he expects national<br />

competition <strong>to</strong> be fierce due <strong>to</strong> school<br />

and personal rivalries which have<br />

formed during the past year.<br />

The Graduate Student Association met March 24. The following were discussed:<br />

• The results of the GSA elections held March 24 were announced:<br />

President: Chris Oehrlein<br />

Vice president: Cormac Flanagan, Maeve McCarthy<br />

Treasurer: Laurie Feinswog<br />

Secretary: Chris S<strong>to</strong>kes<br />

• The council decided <strong>to</strong> give two service awards <strong>to</strong> graduate <strong>students</strong>, and it also approved three separate<br />

awards <strong>to</strong> faculty and staff. Award recipients will be announced at the next meeting.<br />

• Positions are still available forgraduate <strong>students</strong> on the Affirmative Action committee and the University<br />

Council. The council will also elect a sports representative at the next meeting. Those interested should<br />

contact Chris Oehrlein in the math department or their department representative before the next<br />

meeting.<br />

Next meeting: April 13 at 6:30 p.m. in the Miner Lounge at the Ley Student Center<br />

w<br />

M<br />

=H<br />

<<br />

JUNIOR<br />

Order your 1995<br />

class rings<br />

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April 12th & 13th<br />

9:00 AM—4:00 PM<br />

$25 deposit required.<br />

Must have completedat<br />

least 90 hours.<br />

Opening expected <strong>to</strong>day<br />

The Rice University campus location<br />

of the Copy Club is scheduled <strong>to</strong><br />

open <strong>to</strong>day, although minor electrical<br />

work <strong>to</strong>ok longer than expected.<br />

Joe Woolley, manager of the Rice<br />

franchise, said Copy Club hoped <strong>to</strong><br />

open the location Tuesday, but electrical<br />

problems delayed clean-up.<br />

The builders should be finished<br />

by Wednesday, and after that it's just<br />

clean-up and moving our computers<br />

in," Woolley said.<br />

Copy Club contacted <strong>university</strong><br />

newspapers Monday <strong>to</strong> advertise the<br />

opening.<br />

But Woolley said the opening date<br />

remains negotiable. If it doesn't open<br />

<strong>to</strong>day, Copy Club will open early next<br />

week.<br />

"We can't control acts of God,"<br />

Woolley said, "but we're trying our<br />

hardest <strong>to</strong> get in there and open up."<br />

Copy Club is accepting applications<br />

for employment at the campus<br />

s<strong>to</strong>re. Applications are also available<br />

at the Rice Program Council office<br />

and from Woolley.<br />

— by Patricia Lin<br />

NSF prizes awarded<br />

I^ovett College junior Michelle<br />

Price and freshman Griselda Mani<br />

won $1,000 from the National Science<br />

Foundation Incentive for Excellence<br />

Scholarship Prize. The award will be<br />

presented April 16 at the Engineering<br />

Alumni Picnic.<br />

This prize recognizes academic<br />

excellence and is designed <strong>to</strong> encourage<br />

outstanding minority <strong>students</strong> <strong>to</strong><br />

pursue advanced study in science and<br />

Officer<br />

FROM PAGE 1<br />

Jones College sophomore Emily<br />

Meyer, a drunksitter, <strong>evaluate</strong>d the<br />

19-year-old freshman around 2 a.m.<br />

following Rondelet Be<strong>cause</strong> he had<br />

been passed out for several hours and<br />

people who had said they would return<br />

for him did not show up, she<br />

recommended calling campus police<br />

for assistance.<br />

Lanier, a registered nurse, listed<br />

several steps drunksitters take <strong>to</strong> help<br />

them determine when <strong>to</strong> call for help.<br />

"If a student has been passed out<br />

for an hour or more, you need <strong>to</strong> make<br />

an assessment. Ask if they've had anything<br />

<strong>to</strong> eat, how long they were drinking,<br />

what have they been drinking,<br />

when did they startdrinking, and judge<br />

how big they are <strong>to</strong> determine how<br />

much they've been effected," Lanier<br />

.said.<br />

"If someone doesn't respond,<br />

chances are they're probably unconscious.<br />

At that level, they're probably<br />

entering a serious and possibly lifethreatening<br />

situation."<br />

Lanier said she also teaches <strong>students</strong><br />

how <strong>to</strong> position someone who<br />

has passed out "You put them on<br />

their side and prop them up with a<br />

pillow. You want <strong>to</strong> avoid the student<br />

vomiting. If they're on their back and<br />

then vomit, the chances of asphyxiation<br />

are pretty high."<br />

Contrary <strong>to</strong> popular myth, Lanier<br />

said hospitals don't always inducevomiting<br />

when a drunk person is admitted,<br />

unless other drugs also arc suspected.<br />

"Most of the time the alcohol<br />

is already in the bloodstream so hospitals<br />

start an IV <strong>to</strong> dilute the alcohol<br />

level in the blood," she said.<br />

Meyer relied on her training when<br />

she encouraged others <strong>to</strong> call the campus<br />

police.<br />

NEWS IN BRIEF<br />

engineering.<br />

Rice was awarded two prizes in<br />

recognition of two previous minority<br />

NSF Graduate Fellowship winners.<br />

Professors receive grants<br />

Chemistry Professor Marco A.<br />

Ciufolini and math Professor Richard<br />

A Strong have been selected <strong>to</strong> receive<br />

the Alfred P. Sloan Foundation<br />

Research Fellowships. Candidates<br />

were nominated by their department<br />

chairs.<br />

The fellowships, worth $30,000,<br />

support the recipients' [research for<br />

two years.<br />

A <strong>to</strong>tal of 100 fellowships were<br />

awarded out of 400 nominations.<br />

Science forum <strong>to</strong>morrow<br />

The Scientia conference, titled<br />

The Teaching of Science in a University<br />

Curriculum," will be held <strong>to</strong>morrow<br />

in Sewall Hall Room 301. The<br />

program will begin at 8:30 am.<br />

The conference will feature four<br />

speakers on scientific literacy, and a<br />

panel of Rice faculty will comment on<br />

each speech afterward.<br />

Voting site at Hermann Park<br />

Students can vote in the Texas<br />

General Elections primary runoff on<br />

Tuesday from 7 a.m. <strong>to</strong> 7 p.m. at the<br />

Hermann Park Rose Garden Center<br />

Safety discussion next week<br />

University officials will address student<br />

concerns at the Student Association<br />

Forum on Safety on Thursday at<br />

the Grand Hall in the Rice Memorial<br />

Center from 8 <strong>to</strong> 10 p.m.<br />

The [drunksitterj training says<br />

thatingeneralyoudon'twant<strong>to</strong> move<br />

him. I expected that the police would<br />

move him gently since you don't really<br />

want <strong>to</strong> move him at all," she said.<br />

"But Sgt Veltman was very rough<br />

with him, smacking him on the face<br />

and shouting at him <strong>to</strong> get up. But he<br />

couldn't"<br />

Veltman then picked up the<br />

freshman's arm and placed himself<br />

under it. An officer-in-training assisted<br />

on the other side of the freshman, she<br />

said, and.<strong>to</strong>gether they carried and<br />

dragged the student <strong>to</strong> their patrol<br />

car. Afterwards they <strong>to</strong>ok him.<strong>to</strong> the<br />

hospital. Meyer and Maas rode in the<br />

backseat with the freshman and later<br />

received a ride home from Veltman.<br />

"He was nice <strong>to</strong> us after the incident,"<br />

Maassaid. "But,thewholc thing<br />

was that Veltman didn't understand<br />

the situation [the student] was in.<br />

Veltman originally wanted <strong>to</strong> take him<br />

<strong>to</strong> jail <strong>to</strong> the drunk tank. He didn't<br />

react correctly <strong>to</strong> the situation. He<br />

should have come in, be calm, assess<br />

the situation, but he didn't"<br />

While the Meyer, Maas and<br />

Fowlkes disagree oyer the extent any<br />

disciplinary action against Veltman<br />

should take, they all agree campus<br />

police should receive training similar<br />

<strong>to</strong> the drunksitter classes.<br />

"I'd like <strong>to</strong> see all the campos get<br />

training in how <strong>to</strong> handle a situation<br />

like that so they don't put a student in<br />

more danger than they were before,"<br />

Meyer said. She and Maas said they<br />

do not think Veltman should be fired<br />

for the incident<br />

Fowlkes wants Veltman dismissed.<br />

"I'll be satisfied if he's dismissed from<br />

the force and if any other charges had<br />

been appropriate, like assault, that they<br />

would have been prosecuted. Nothing<br />

short of dismissal will send the<br />

right message that the campus police<br />

are really here <strong>to</strong> protect us," he said.<br />

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SWIM INSTRUCTORS<br />

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NEWS THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 7<br />

Security<br />

FROM PAGE 1<br />

outstanding ... and provide opportunities<br />

for promotion," Currie said.<br />

Thedepartmentwas havingaproblem<br />

keeping officers who would give<br />

training programs in the suburbs and<br />

would get recruited by those departments,<br />

Currie said.<br />

Jones and Brown College parking<br />

lots were blocked off onTuesday night<br />

At Jones, the exit <strong>to</strong> Sunset Boulevard<br />

was closed from 11 p.m. <strong>to</strong> sunrise.<br />

The two external entrances <strong>to</strong> the<br />

Brown lot also were chained shut<br />

Brown Master Robert Haymessaid<br />

the administration has come up with a<br />

few solutions, which include closing<br />

the parking lots at night and adding<br />

lights <strong>to</strong> the Jones parking lot<br />

Haymes also said the <strong>university</strong> is<br />

asking Brown members <strong>to</strong> give up<br />

their parking places in the alley near<br />

the master's house so that <strong>students</strong><br />

can use the alley <strong>to</strong> enter the parking<br />

lot at night.<br />

Brown members approved of closing<br />

the lot but didn't want <strong>to</strong> lose the<br />

20 parking spaces in the alley.<br />

Jones has had a guard posted in<br />

the parking lot all night since the incident<br />

Abreo said Voswinkel <strong>to</strong>ld <strong>students</strong><br />

the guard will remain until the<br />

end of classes and maybe until graduation.<br />

Haymes said during a Brown cabinet<br />

meeting Wednesday that one of<br />

the reasons the <strong>university</strong> had rejected<br />

SA Business<br />

the idea of posting <strong>security</strong> guards in<br />

every parking lot was be<strong>cause</strong> it would<br />

cost $12,000 for the rest of the semester.<br />

He said he thought the <strong>university</strong><br />

considered this cost <strong>to</strong>o expensive.<br />

Student response<br />

Brown <strong>students</strong> expressed frustration<br />

ata cabinet meeting about campus<br />

<strong>security</strong> and suggested ways <strong>to</strong><br />

exert pressure on the administration.<br />

Brown freshman Gilber<strong>to</strong> Ortiz<br />

said, "The administration hasn't been<br />

listening <strong>to</strong> us, and we have <strong>to</strong> do<br />

something."<br />

Brown junior Carol Chapman said,<br />

"We pay <strong>to</strong> live here, and we pay a lot,<br />

and we should be safe here. If we<br />

threaten them Iwith media attention J,<br />

they might do something."<br />

The cabinet decided <strong>to</strong> give $3(X)<br />

<strong>to</strong> have <strong>students</strong> set up a Brown lighting<br />

system immediately.<br />

Another group of <strong>students</strong> is posting<br />

petitions <strong>to</strong>day <strong>to</strong> call for increased<br />

<strong>security</strong> measures.<br />

Graduate student Lauren Bernard<br />

said she brought up the idea in her<br />

class.<br />

"[Students'] reactions were 'No<br />

one's going <strong>to</strong> do anything be<strong>cause</strong><br />

the student body is <strong>to</strong>o apathetic.' I<br />

said we can do something <strong>to</strong> change<br />

that," Bernard said.<br />

The petition outlines six measures<br />

for the <strong>university</strong> <strong>to</strong> take: improved<br />

lighting all over campus; permanent<br />

closing of all unused exits <strong>to</strong> campus;<br />

construction of a wall or high <strong>security</strong><br />

fence around campus; installation of<br />

The Student Association met Monday. The following were<br />

discussed:<br />

• The escort cart will run an hour longer. The hours are now<br />

from Sunday through Thursday from 10 p.m. <strong>to</strong> 2 a.m.<br />

• Sena<strong>to</strong>rs will conduct interviews <strong>to</strong> fill the vacant University<br />

Council position.<br />

• Brown College junior Kraettli Epperson and Hanszen<br />

College junior Stephanie Keyeswere unanimously elected<br />

<strong>to</strong> the Executive Cofnmittee as parliamentarian and<br />

executive vice president, respectively.<br />

• A committee was formed <strong>to</strong> oversee cable-television<br />

access on campus.<br />

• This Senate approved an amendment <strong>to</strong> the by-laws that<br />

would require the incoming Senate, rat herthan the outgoing<br />

Senate, <strong>to</strong> interview candidates for standing committees.<br />

• The Senate unanimously approved Hanszen President<br />

Ben Walrath, Jones College President Damian Abreo,<br />

Internal Vice President Becky Almaguer and President<br />

Marty Makulski for the Awards Committee.<br />

Next meeting: Monday at 10 p.m. in the Ley Student Center's<br />

Kelley Lounge<br />

— compiled by Samidha Ghosh<br />

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<strong>security</strong> checkpoints at all entrances<br />

after dark; more campus police officers<br />

and patrols on foot and a better<br />

<strong>security</strong> escort system.<br />

"I've been <strong>to</strong> three universities in<br />

my life and this is the one I've felt most<br />

unsafe at," Hunt said. "That includes<br />

Columbia"<br />

After four car thefts from the Jones<br />

parking lot last year, one of them at<br />

gunpoint, the Jones lot has earned a<br />

reputation for being dangerous and<br />

poorly lit<br />

Students at Jones arc organizing<br />

their own escort committee and organizing<br />

a door watch <strong>to</strong> see that the 2!><br />

or 30-second delay of a card reader<br />

does not endanger <strong>students</strong>, Abreo<br />

said. Similar efforts are being made at<br />

Sid Richardson College.<br />

SA Security Committee<br />

A report from the Student Association<br />

Security Committee labeled the<br />

Jones parking lot a "high priority" for<br />

improved lighting as early as last Oc<strong>to</strong>ber,<br />

Ivovett College representative<br />

Angela Hunt said.<br />

The committee report mentioned<br />

three poorly lit places on campus needing<br />

"immediate action" — the SRC<br />

parking lot, the area between the Will<br />

RPC Notes<br />

Rice College masters' house and the<br />

parking lot and the area between the<br />

inner loop and Rayzor Hall, she said.<br />

The high-priority list, which is less<br />

urgent than the immediate-action list,<br />

included the area near the inner loop,<br />

Herring Hall, Rayzor Hall, the Engineering<br />

Quad, the area east of the<br />

student center behind the chapel and<br />

the area between space physics and<br />

Herring Hall.<br />

The Jones parking lot was on this<br />

list<br />

SRC Master Gordon Wittenburg,<br />

head of the committee, said the committee<br />

thought lighting the area between<br />

SRC and WRC was so important<br />

that it required an immediate response.<br />

Ijghts were installed in that<br />

area, he said.<br />

But other committee members<br />

expressed disappointment with the<br />

slow progress.<br />

"It seems like we keep coming up<br />

against the question 'Is it in the budget?'<br />

and 'Is it in the lighting plan?'"<br />

Hunt said.<br />

WRC representative Alex Cestero<br />

echoed her frustration.<br />

" I felt that it was a paper committee<br />

and it was formed in response <strong>to</strong> the<br />

Brown incident," Cestero said.<br />

The Rice Program Council met March 28. The following were discussed:<br />

• Rondelet made $1,000 and Beer-Bike may have made almost $3,000.<br />

He was referring <strong>to</strong> a Brown student<br />

in her college bathroom five years<br />

ago, which resulted in an out-of-court<br />

settlement<br />

"We've had a lot of feasible suggestions<br />

over the last two years but it<br />

seemed <strong>to</strong> me our suggestions were<br />

not getting past the administration<br />

and were not taken seriously," he said.<br />

Hunt noted it may be difficult for<br />

the people making decisions <strong>to</strong> fully<br />

grasp student concerns.<br />

"You have <strong>to</strong> understand these<br />

people work here nine <strong>to</strong> five who<br />

don't see the campus at night," she<br />

said. Hunt said Facilities and Engineering<br />

employees were surprised by<br />

the 10 <strong>to</strong> 15 burnt out lights they<br />

encountered on a nighttime walk with<br />

the Security Committee last semester.<br />

But last week'sviolentcrimes have<br />

raised questions about campus <strong>security</strong>,<br />

and Cestero hopes that the<br />

committee's concerns will be given<br />

higher priority.<br />

"I think this will enable the committee<br />

<strong>to</strong> be a little bit more empowered<br />

... I thin know the ad ministration<br />

is more responsive <strong>to</strong> <strong>students</strong>, and<br />

we just need support from above," he<br />

said.<br />

• Astroworld College Night will be held April 27. Tickets will be $12.95 and can be purchased at the<br />

campus s<strong>to</strong>re with a student ID.<br />

• The free screening of Backbeatw\W be 8 p.m. Tuesday at the Rice Media Center.<br />

• An amendment <strong>to</strong> the constitution requiringthe treasurer<strong>to</strong> take Accounting305 was rejected. Another<br />

amendment giving the external vice president the power <strong>to</strong> sign checks passed.<br />

• The Formals Committee reported a few problems with the ticket-takers at Rondelet. It was suggested<br />

that Rice <strong>students</strong> should be hired in the future <strong>to</strong> take tickets. Many also complained about the DJ.<br />

Next meeting: Sunday at Sid Richardson College<br />

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THE


8 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT<br />

Rachel Rosenthal appears at the<br />

Heinen Theater using her own<br />

aging and disintegrating body as<br />

a metaphor for the Earth. Friday<br />

and Saturday at 8 p.m. at<br />

Hous<strong>to</strong>n Community College<br />

Central, 3715 Austin. Fifteen<br />

big dollars. Call 22S0914 for<br />

information on this disgusting-<br />

sounding thing.<br />

Ezra Charles and the Works will haul<br />

their collective ass <strong>to</strong> the prestigious<br />

Taco Cabana at 6006 Westhetaier<br />

Sunday from 2 <strong>to</strong> S p.m. Come hear<br />

them for free, but don't drink the water<br />

without a notarized receipt and personal<br />

bodyguard.<br />

Art in the Park, featuring jazz and fashion,<br />

two great tastes that taste great<br />

<strong>to</strong>gether, runs <strong>to</strong>day, Saturday and<br />

Sunday from 10 a.m. <strong>to</strong> 6 p.m. on the<br />

SuperBlock in front of George R. Brown<br />

Convention Center. Would you pay for<br />

this? They don't expect you <strong>to</strong>.<br />

Wyndnwyre hits the Mucky Duck with<br />

their mix of Celtic, medieval and<br />

renaissance music. Starting Thursday<br />

at 8:30, the show costs whatever it<br />

takes <strong>to</strong> get in<strong>to</strong> the Mucky Duck on<br />

2425Norfolk. Call 528-5999and ladies,<br />

don't forget <strong>to</strong> wear your corsets.<br />

Wiess College<br />

sponsors mu ttiple Rice<br />

^ ' bands (Stab, Bee<br />

Stung Lips, more) for a TG at 4<br />

p.m. Free, obviously.<br />

Spinning Wheel and The Rooster bring<br />

out the dark side of Korean peasant life.<br />

$4.25 for both films, 7:30 and 9:30 at<br />

the Media Center.<br />

9 Shepherd<br />

School Percussion<br />

Ensemble at 8 p.m. in Stude<br />

^ A T concert Hall. Free. (See<br />

article, p. 9.)<br />

Chilsu and mansu and The Ago of<br />

Success at the Media Center, 7:30 and<br />

9:30. $4.25 for both.<br />

^I Syzygy: New Music at Rice<br />

li " " presents "Serenades and<br />

^ ^ " Symphonies," with music of<br />

Schutz, Mozart, Boicom, more. 8 p.m. in<br />

Stude. Free.<br />

Guest artist Steven<br />

mJLmm Glaser, piano, joins<br />

T U E us from Texas Tech<br />

for a concert of heavy-duty<br />

keyboard pounding<br />

(Liszt, Rachmaninoff,<br />

more.) 8 p.m. In<br />

Duncan Recital<br />

HaH. Free.<br />

ym Raise the Red Lantern, a<br />

•" "provocative parable of Power<br />

^ ^ ^ and its methods of self-<br />

perpetuation," was banned in China in<br />

1992.7:30 at the Media Center, $4.25.<br />

HOLY GOAT<br />

Non-serial monogamy OK in 'Weddings'<br />

BY K R I S T I A N LIN<br />

Direc<strong>to</strong>r Mike Newell's comedy Four Weddings<br />

and a Funeral starts out with El<strong>to</strong>n John's<br />

stylish rendition of Gershwin's "But Not For<br />

Me" on the soundtrack.<br />

Like most of the other joys in this film, it<br />

lingers pleasantly in the brain, unconnected <strong>to</strong><br />

any memory you have of the film as a whole.<br />

Four Weddings is essentially fluff, but it's fluff of<br />

a very high order, and it's one of the funniest<br />

movies in some time.<br />

The pk>t revolves around Charles (Hugh<br />

Grant), a 32-year-old English "serial monogamist"<br />

who loves his girlfriends but can never<br />

commit <strong>to</strong> a single relationship.<br />

Then he meets a beautiful, free-spirited American<br />

named Carrie (Andie MacDowell) at a<br />

friend's wedding and spends the film trying <strong>to</strong><br />

deal with his feelings for her.<br />

The script of Four Weddings and a Funeral is<br />

by Richard Curtis, known for his brilliant British<br />

TV sitcom "Blackadder." The film is loosely<br />

structured and, like a sitcom, relies heavily on<br />

punchlines and funny situations. But Curtis keeps<br />

a coherent s<strong>to</strong>ryline going, and even when he<br />

suddenly reaches for poignance in the middle of<br />

this affair, it's quite within his grasp.<br />

Newell seems <strong>to</strong> have found his niche in light<br />

comedy. He certainly deserves credit not only<br />

for maintaining his light <strong>to</strong>uch, but for a small<br />

army of enjoyable comic performances from his<br />

supporting casL<br />

Even if, like me, you don't number yourself<br />

among Hugh Grant's adoring fans, you have <strong>to</strong><br />

admit that the script is perfectly tailored <strong>to</strong> Grant's<br />

perennial uptightness.<br />

Curtis puts him in all sorts of spots that take<br />

advantage of this quality—at a wedding where,<br />

as best man, he forgets the rings; at a table<br />

comprised of his ex-girlfriends, who start comparing<br />

notes; in a room where a couple, unaware<br />

of his presence, is having sex. Grant's worried<br />

expression and oversized teeth carry him<br />

through.<br />

MacDowell has her share of moments, such<br />

as when she hides from a drunken boor in a<br />

lobby or runs through her sexual his<strong>to</strong>ry for the<br />

benefit of an appalled Grant. But she never<br />

CROW TRACKS<br />

Lydia (Sophie Thompson), Bernard (David Haig) and ah oops grande in Four Weddings and a Funeral.<br />

emerges as a fully realized character.<br />

And here we have the one significant problem<br />

with the film: the casting of the romantic<br />

leads. It's not that we don't like them; we feel<br />

they're very nice people who should be <strong>to</strong>gether.<br />

It's just that Grant and MacDowell come off as<br />

colorless compared with the other ac<strong>to</strong>rs in the<br />

film. There's the nagging sense that a more<br />

interesting film might have been made about<br />

Charles' friends.<br />

That's a small complaint, though. Charles'<br />

friends are played by a fine bunch — Charlotte<br />

Coleman, James Fleet and John Hannah all give<br />

depth <strong>to</strong> their roles.<br />

Simon Callow has a great reaction <strong>to</strong> two folk<br />

singers who butcher "Can't Smile Without You"<br />

even worse than Barry Manilow. But the one<br />

whoU stick out in your mind is Kristin Scott<br />

Thomas, who's about as cool and elegant as<br />

actresses come, and who manages <strong>to</strong> be affecting<br />

when called upon <strong>to</strong> do so.<br />

Corin Redgrave, Jeremy Kemp and Sophie<br />

Thompson (Emma's sister) fill out bit parts, and<br />

Rowan Atkinson hasadevastatingly funny scene<br />

as a nervous clergyman performing his first<br />

wedding (he refers <strong>to</strong> "the Father, the Son, and<br />

the Holy Goat").<br />

One of the magnificent little surprises in this<br />

film is the relationship between Charles and his<br />

deaf brother David (played by deaf ac<strong>to</strong>r David<br />

Bower).<br />

You can imagine most Hollywood movies<br />

dutifully introducing this character and then<br />

shunting him off <strong>to</strong> the margins of the s<strong>to</strong>ry, but<br />

David gets <strong>to</strong> play a pivotal role in this film.<br />

Bower plays with the right amount of amused<br />

detachment, especially in his reaction <strong>to</strong> a woman<br />

who talks <strong>to</strong> him in imperfect sign language.<br />

The film that Four Weddings will probably<br />

remind you of is Kenneth Branagh's Peter's<br />

Friends (1992); but Four Weddings and a Funeral<br />

isn't as aggressively shallow as Branagh's<br />

film, and Newell's ac<strong>to</strong>rs are even better at<br />

fleshing outsitcomroles than Branagh's marvelous<br />

cast<br />

In the final equation, what you get in Four<br />

Weddings and a Funeral is sharp, clever writing<br />

delivered by appealing ac<strong>to</strong>rs you probably<br />

haven't seen before. That's as good a reason <strong>to</strong><br />

see a film as any.<br />

Toon tracks, remix albums not all flops<br />

VARIOUS ARTISTS<br />

B Y J E R E M Y H A R T<br />

THE CROW ORIGINAL MOWN PICTURE SOUNDTRACK<br />

Oh boy. This movie looks like it'll be interesting,<br />

just from what little I've heard of the comic<br />

book it's based on and from the pictures in the<br />

soundtrack liner notes.<br />

I'm still skeptical, though — comics don't<br />

have a great his<strong>to</strong>ry on the big screen. I'm not<br />

talking the Batman-blockbu sters; those were<br />

flukes. I'm thinking more of The Punisher —<br />

stay away from this horrible waste of film—and<br />

Captain America, which was so bad that I don't<br />

think they even released it in this country.<br />

Still, just the pictures for The Crow look gritty<br />

and "dark" enough <strong>to</strong> make me happy. We'll see.<br />

Anyway, if the movie is as good as the soundtrack<br />

(oh yeah, this is a music review), this should be<br />

an interesting movie.<br />

The album starts off with a new Cure tune,<br />

"Burn," and ooh, does it send chills down my<br />

spine. Well, sort of.<br />

I'm not a Gure fan — haven't ever had much<br />

exposure <strong>to</strong> goth music of any kind. From what<br />

I remember, the goth fans in my high school<br />

dyed their hair different colors<br />

every other day, had<br />

strange body parts pierced,<br />

hung around in a pack at the<br />

mall, and were ostracized as<br />

being weirdos be<strong>cause</strong> they<br />

didn't like Metallica, N.WA or<br />

the Pet Shop Boys (don't fret<br />

over this horrid example of high<br />

school closed-minded prejudice<br />

— they probably liked<br />

being outcasts). So I don't<br />

like the Cure.<br />

I do, however, like this.<br />

It's haunting, echoey and melancholy, but still<br />

damn danceable.<br />

Speaking of dark and gloomy, this whole<br />

album has a grim, depressing under<strong>to</strong>ne <strong>to</strong> iL I<br />

mean, one of the coolest songs on here is, Nine<br />

Inch Nails doing a cover of Joy Division's "Dead<br />

Souls," with the subdued-but-threatening snarl<br />

of "they keepcal ling me/they keepcalling me..."<br />

If this song isn't a prelude <strong>to</strong> some kind of<br />

self-destruct sequence, then I don't know what<br />

<strong>to</strong> call iL Machines of Loving Grace tread the<br />

same waters, as well, turning in an unusual, slow<br />

techno-metal grind on "Golgotha Tenement<br />

Blues," complete with orchestral keyboards.<br />

Rage Against The Machine makes only a<br />

mediocre attempt at slamming political protest<br />

— okay, I take it back; it's not mediocre, it's just<br />

nothing really new. Sounds like their whole<br />

album. If that's your thing, go for it—Ijustdon't<br />

think screaming political protest comes across<br />

unless you're playing in front of an actual crowd<br />

of angry youth.<br />

Credit goes <strong>to</strong> the Rollins Band for an appropriate<br />

choice of cover tunes. Our pal Henry and<br />

Company do a bluesy punk-metal rendition of (I<br />

think) a Suicide tune, "Ghostrider." Imagine the<br />

Doors on amphetamines and steroids, singing<br />

about everybody's favorite flameheaded comic<br />

book character and you'll be close.<br />

Fellow heaviness kings Helmet and Pantera<br />

also make appearances here, with "Milk<strong>to</strong>ast"<br />

and "The Badge," respectively. The Helmet tune<br />

just isn't harsh enough for my taste, though still<br />

pretty good (melody from Helmet? Interesting).<br />

Pantera's is an anti-police tirade that sounds<br />

much more punk than metal <strong>to</strong> me.<br />

For Love Not Lisa is new <strong>to</strong> me, but I was<br />

fairly impressed with "Slip Slide Melting," a<br />

ripping, dis<strong>to</strong>rted slam-dance rock gem, the<br />

best dance-thrash this side of Therapy?.<br />

The Jesus and Mary Chain introduce us <strong>to</strong><br />

the surf-rock, what the Beach Boysmight've<br />

written instead of "Good Vibrations" if they'd<br />

grown up on punk and leather rather driving<br />

daddy's car around all the time. A cool highslung<br />

bass groove and screaming feedback, and<br />

bam, damn good driving music.<br />

When I listen <strong>to</strong> movie soundtracks, I try <strong>to</strong><br />

match the movie <strong>to</strong> the music in sequence —<br />

don't ask me why, I just do. In this case, I can see<br />

it working, believe* or not<br />

The final two tracks on the album are a<br />

denouement of sorts, lifting the listener up from<br />

the dark depths of the Cure, Helmet and Nine<br />

Inch Nails for some shivery-sweet guitar, drifting<br />

back and forth in a mist of melodic, beautiful<br />

shoegazerpop, courtesy of Medicinewith Time<br />

Baby III."<br />

The last tune is the clincher, though. Jane<br />

S'iberry's "It Can't Rain All The Time" manages<br />

<strong>to</strong> evoke a feeling of both melancholy and triumph<br />

with Siberry's beautiful Kate Bush/Tori<br />

Amos-ish vocals and melodies. The sparse beauty<br />

of her half-whispered chorus just catches. The<br />

perfect lost-love theme song.<br />

From the almost suicidal depths of the beginning<br />

<strong>to</strong> the closing triumph, this album deserves<br />

some serious attention. I only hope The Crow<br />

itself is this good.<br />

JACKOPIERCE<br />

BRINGING ON THE WEATHER<br />

Blame it on my little Brother. It's his fault this<br />

album pisses me off. I'm the older brother, right?<br />

I'm supposed <strong>to</strong> hand him a tape, say, This is<br />

cool," and hell love it It's my privilege. Or not.<br />

I am a bit pissed off, though, at myself for<br />

blowing my little bro off when he tried <strong>to</strong> get me<br />

<strong>to</strong> listen <strong>to</strong> these guys months ago.<br />

Jackopierce is two soft-hearted guys (one<br />

named Pierce and the other named Jack-something;<br />

uh, creative name, I guess) who know<br />

every painful inch of small-<strong>to</strong>wn life.<br />

They strum and sing with husky sincerity,<br />

reminding me of nothing more than a male,<br />

more Texan analog <strong>to</strong> Georgia's Indigo Girls.<br />

Countryish folk, with <strong>to</strong>uches of rock and pop<br />

blended in<strong>to</strong> quiet, sharply-accurate s<strong>to</strong>ries about<br />

pain—pain of separation, pain of love, of almost<br />

any kind of loss you can imagine.<br />

From the melancholy pop of "Late Shift," a<br />

tale about a "Dear John" letter, <strong>to</strong> "Jacob,'' <strong>to</strong> a<br />

song about a child caught in the fftiddle of a<br />

divorce, the songs on this album are well-<strong>to</strong>ld<br />

s<strong>to</strong>ries, Springsteen-style. Jackopierce has an<br />

amazing feel for the "quiet country life." It's<br />

refreshing <strong>to</strong> listen <strong>to</strong> music that's personal and<br />

down-<strong>to</strong>-earth and not country.<br />

The only downer on here is when they drift a<br />

bit <strong>to</strong>o close <strong>to</strong> mainstream rock a la the Counting<br />

Crows with "Anderson's Luck," but they<br />

make up for that quickly enough with the reminiscing<br />

of "Witch In The Old Man" and the<br />

jangly groove of "Get To Know Me Better."<br />

What can I say? I screwed up by trying <strong>to</strong> be<br />

an older brother. Craig, I owe you an apology.<br />

SEE SAMPLER, PAGE 10


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY. APRIL 8, 1994 9<br />

POPCORN PAIN<br />

The Newsies grew up — and they should have stayed kids<br />

B Y K R I S T I A N L I N<br />

"I know you're a newspaperman.<br />

I can smell 'em off a mile away.<br />

Excuse me while I open a window."<br />

— Ben Hecht<br />

script for Nothing Sacred (1937)<br />

Direc<strong>to</strong>r Ron Howard turns <strong>to</strong> an<br />

old genre, newspaper comedy, <strong>to</strong> produce<br />

"The Paper, an old-fashioned piece<br />

of entertainment that's well-engineered<br />

enough <strong>to</strong> overcome its flaws.<br />

The film follows one unusually<br />

hectic day in the life of the New York<br />

Sun's metro edi<strong>to</strong>r, Henry Hackett<br />

(Michael Kea<strong>to</strong>n).<br />

Henry is hot on the s<strong>to</strong>ry of two<br />

black teenagers accused of the racially<br />

motivated killing of two wealthy<br />

businessmen. He thinks they're inno-<br />

cent, and chases down the s<strong>to</strong>ry while<br />

trying <strong>to</strong> placate his neglected eightand-a-half-month<br />

pregnant wife<br />

Martha (Marisa Tomei), the paper's<br />

cost-cutting managing edi<strong>to</strong>r (Glenn<br />

Close), and the edi<strong>to</strong>r of the stuffy<br />

New York Sentinel (read: New York<br />

Times), who offers Henry a safer, more<br />

respectable job at a paper that doesn't<br />

almost fold every six months.<br />

Don't expect a hard-hitting expose<br />

of tabloid journalism from this film.<br />

The script does its best <strong>to</strong> avoid thorny<br />

issues of ethics and the increasing<br />

sensationalizing/tabloidizing of mainstream<br />

media (like the New York<br />

Times). Henry Hackett keeps affirming<br />

the principle of journalistic in teg-<br />

PEA-SPIKED RICE<br />

rity, but nobody really challenges him<br />

on it<br />

Screenwriters David and Stephen<br />

Koepp seem <strong>to</strong> delight in piling obstacles<br />

on<strong>to</strong> the script just for the sake<br />

of piling them on. Of course Martha<br />

will go in<strong>to</strong> labor before the movie's<br />

over, and McDougal (Randy Quaid),<br />

the paranoid columnist sleeping in<br />

Henry's office, will run in<strong>to</strong> the man<br />

he claims is trying <strong>to</strong> kill him<br />

Don't expect a<br />

hard-hitting<br />

expose of tabloid<br />

journalism from<br />

this film.<br />

It might seem they're going a bit<br />

far. Does Martha's pregnancy have <strong>to</strong><br />

developcomplications? Doesthe5««'s<br />

edi<strong>to</strong>r-in-chief (Robert Duvall) have<br />

<strong>to</strong> have prostate cancer and problems<br />

with his daughter?<br />

Another problem is Glenn Close's<br />

character, the same corporate<br />

superbitch that we've all seen in the<br />

movies. The Koepps make some attempts<br />

<strong>to</strong> humanize her, but their<br />

hearts aren't in it<br />

Guys, couldn't we have some successful<br />

working women in the movies<br />

who are also sympathetic for a change?<br />

There are enough of them out here in<br />

the real world.<br />

Ron Howard isn't a great artist and<br />

certainly not a great innova<strong>to</strong>r, but he<br />

has an unfailing sense of what works.<br />

He maintains the film's breathless pace<br />

and only falters slightly when the script<br />

bogs down in sentimentality.<br />

He has a real feel for the<br />

newsroom's pressure-cooker atmosphere.<br />

One of the film's biggest<br />

laughs comes at a point where everyone<br />

is in Henry's office complaining<br />

and McDougal finally shuts them all<br />

up by firing off his gun.<br />

Michael Kea<strong>to</strong>n helps matters<br />

enormously. A more cerebral ac<strong>to</strong>r<br />

might have made this character's vir-<br />

COCKTAIL HOUR<br />

tue insufferable; Kea<strong>to</strong>n just lets it fly.<br />

He gives you the sense that he's in<br />

control even when the whole world is<br />

collapsing around him<br />

The supporting cast gives him<br />

room <strong>to</strong> work, <strong>to</strong>o. Close and Duvall<br />

are given the shaft by the script, but<br />

they play off Kea<strong>to</strong>n nicely.<br />

Tomei sparkles with the right mix<br />

of irony, bubbliness and hardscrabble<br />

intelligence. Quaid brings along his<br />

familiar quirks, while Jason Robards,<br />

Catherine O'Hara and Jason<br />

Alexander get juicy smaller roles.<br />

And yet, with ail this talent in the<br />

cast, an actress named Amelia Cook<br />

runs off with the film's emotional high<br />

point She plays a novice news pho<strong>to</strong>grapher<br />

who wades through hell <strong>to</strong> get<br />

pictures of the two accused teenagers,<br />

only <strong>to</strong> find all but one of the<br />

pictures out of focus. Her reaction is<br />

theonly thing in this picture that makes<br />

you feel like cheering.<br />

The Paper sets out <strong>to</strong> be a popcorn<br />

picture, light on depth and high on<br />

laughs and thrills, and achieves that<br />

end in ruthless fashion. It has all the<br />

immediacy of <strong>to</strong>day's newspaper, and<br />

winds up being just as disposable.<br />

Ensemble puts out exotic sounds<br />

BY T RIC I A<br />

GlESBRECHT<br />

SHEPHERD SCHOOL PERCUSSION ENSEMBLE<br />

SATURDAY, APRIL 9, 8 P.M.<br />

STUDE CONCERT HALL<br />

FREE<br />

This year's final Shepherd School<br />

Percussion Ensemble concert will be<br />

an evening of jazz, Brazilian, Caribbean<br />

and African music.<br />

The ensemble's first all-jazz concert,<br />

the program covers fifty years of<br />

jazz. From the roots of jazz, heard in a<br />

suite arranged by guest artist Alafia<br />

Gaidi, it moves <strong>to</strong> standards such as<br />

Indian spice, rice abound at Shiva<br />

Restaurant offers chance <strong>to</strong> try something new, light a fire in your mouth<br />

SHIVA<br />

2514 TIMES<br />

5 2 3 4 7 5 3<br />

B Y A N N A B E L<br />

LUNCH: 11:30-2:30 MONDAY-FRIDAY,<br />

12-3 SATURDAY, 11:303 SUNDAY<br />

DINNER: 6-10 NIGHTLY<br />

I love mom-and-pop type restaurants.<br />

Especially when mom and pop<br />

have names that I can't pronounce.<br />

Shiva Indian restaurant in the Village<br />

is one of the second type.<br />

The scarf-fes<strong>to</strong>oned ceiling, pink<br />

walls, sitar music and incense-filled<br />

air don't exactly remind me of my own<br />

home, but I enjoy them even more.<br />

And the food at Shiva is simply <strong>to</strong> die<br />

for.<br />

Eastern Indian food is not for the<br />

timid, but on a recent trip, I had a<br />

delightful dinner. All sorts of exotic<br />

flavors and spices dazzled my taste<br />

buds.<br />

The meal started with complementary<br />

crispy wafers and two fiery chutneys<br />

for dipping — the Asian equivalent<br />

of the requisite chips and salsa at<br />

Hous<strong>to</strong>n's many Tex-Mex joints. I<br />

munched and let my eyes water as I<br />

read the extensive menu.<br />

Shiva offers a variety of appetizers,<br />

but I was quite content with my wa-<br />

fers, so I moved on <strong>to</strong> other choices. menu — <strong>to</strong> soak up the last drops of<br />

Tandoori dishes — meats marinated the succulent sauces. And wonderful<br />

and grilled in a traditional Indian clay they were. Many Indian restaurants<br />

oven (around $10) — looked tempt- serve greasy naan, but Shiva's was<br />

ing, as did the various incarnations of light and tasty. I could have made a<br />

chicken, lamb, beef, shrimp ($9-10), meal of the bread.<br />

rice ($8-9.50) and vegetables ($6.50). The bread also serves <strong>to</strong> cool the<br />

All dishes other than the vegetar- fire, but my mouth was still flaming.<br />

ian options come with a yummy pea- Fortunately, Indian cuisine provides<br />

spiked rice. Another side order of rice its own cure. A lassi is a sweet, cool<br />

goes for $2.50.<br />

yogurt drink—an Eastern milkshake,<br />

Indian food is so wonderfully spicy, and Shiva's mango lassi ($2) is the<br />

even die-hard carnivores can find best I've had. Sweet but not <strong>to</strong>o sweet<br />

plenty of flavor without meat I ended or creamy, it's a great counterpart <strong>to</strong><br />

up with Aloo Zeera Punjabi (saut6ed our wilder concoctions.<br />

pota<strong>to</strong>es spiced with coriander, mus- Another "homey" <strong>to</strong>uch is the hot<br />

tard seeds and cilantro), Navratan-E- damp <strong>to</strong>wels our waiter brought after<br />

Bahar ("nine jewels of India" — sea- . the meal <strong>to</strong> wipe my hands. After the<br />

sonal vegetables, nuts and raisins in a dipping frenzy, they proved most use-<br />

<strong>to</strong>ma<strong>to</strong> sauce), Sham-Savera (spinach ful.<br />

balls stuffed with masala and cheese Shiva's service began wonderfully<br />

and simmered in a light, spicy gravy), — lots of refills and checking on our<br />

and Karahi Murgh (chicken pieces progress. But as the restaurant filled<br />

cooked in "a host of herbs and spices" up, the waiters were less attentive.<br />

with bell peppers and <strong>to</strong>ma<strong>to</strong>es). They were quite busy welcoming other<br />

I can't begin <strong>to</strong> identify the spices new diners, but I had <strong>to</strong> wait far <strong>to</strong>o<br />

that flavored the food, but they were long for the check and finally asked<br />

perfectly balanced and delicious with- for it.<br />

out overwhelming the vegetables they Even though Shiva is not terribly<br />

accompanied.<br />

speedy or inexpensive, it is a wonder-<br />

I ordered some extra rice and naan ful dinner spot that, if you want <strong>to</strong> go<br />

($1.75 serves two) — the "traditional that far, will pay back penniless col-<br />

leavened white bread" from the aptlylege <strong>students</strong> for weeks and more of<br />

named Wheat Wonders section of the skimping on stale crackers and water.<br />

FAIRFAX J<br />

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Duke Elling<strong>to</strong>n's "Satin Doll" <strong>to</strong> the<br />

contemporary "Senior Mouse" by<br />

Chick Corea.<br />

It is largely through their experience<br />

in this ensemble that Shepherd<br />

School percussionists acquire tricks<br />

of the trade which are not normally<br />

encountered in classical art music.<br />

Each semester the ensemble studies<br />

a new area of percussion technique.<br />

Larry Slezak, direc<strong>to</strong>r of the<br />

Rice Jazz Ensemble, was guest instruc<strong>to</strong>r<br />

for this semester's emphasis<br />

on jazz vibraphone and the various<br />

styles of jazz.<br />

On the program for Saturday night<br />

are several jazz standards arranged<br />

by ensemble members themselves.<br />

The arrangements are for five mallet<br />

instruments, rhythm section and<br />

optional horns. Among these are Vic<strong>to</strong>r<br />

Feldman's "Rio," arranged by Erich<br />

Loftis and Wayne Shorter's "Foot-<br />

prints," arranged by Douglas<br />

Card well.<br />

Other members of the ensemble<br />

are Paul Cox, Nathan Davis, Joanna<br />

Nelson, Frank Ronneburg, Michael<br />

Sharkey and Joe 1 Stcin.The ensemble<br />

is directed by Richard Brown.<br />

These regular members will be<br />

TH* Best Piru In Town...<br />

complemented by Shepherd School<br />

<strong>students</strong> Lisa Waters (flute), Don<br />

Immel (trombone), Gabriela Frank<br />

(piano) and bassists Bob Rohwer and<br />

David Murray.<br />

Larry Slezak is a featured soloist<br />

on the saxophone, clarinet and flute,<br />

performing music of Duke Elling<strong>to</strong>n,<br />

"Fats" Waller, Cole Porter, "Dizzy"<br />

Gillespie and Irving Berlin.<br />

Tropic Envoy, Hous<strong>to</strong>n's wellknown<br />

steel drum duo, will also join<br />

the ensemble for Ken "Professor"<br />

Philmore's "Pan by S<strong>to</strong>rm" and other<br />

Caribbean music. Additional authentic<br />

ethnic instruments will be featured<br />

by Alafia Gaidi, founder of D.R.U.M.,<br />

Hous<strong>to</strong>n'spremier African percussion<br />

ensemble.<br />

Although this concert will be held<br />

in the beautiful and formal Stude Concert<br />

Hall, the program seems <strong>to</strong> fit<br />

perfectly well in a night club setting<br />

with a two drink minimum.<br />

Now is your chance <strong>to</strong> leave your<br />

concert etiquette at home. If you are<br />

swept away — and you will be — by<br />

one of the fastest renditions of "I've<br />

Got Rhythm" that you've ever heard,<br />

feel free <strong>to</strong> applaud in the middle of<br />

the piece. It's that kind of show.<br />

CATHY A. SHANNON<br />

At<strong>to</strong>rney At Law<br />

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I


10 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT<br />

DENMARK ON THE ANDES<br />

Much lost in adaptation of Allende's 'House of the Spirits'<br />

B Y K R I S T I A N L I N<br />

"And he takes her <strong>to</strong> the wretched<br />

movies<br />

Where the heroes are horses or<br />

passionate princes."<br />

—Pablo Neruda<br />

One can only wonder what Neruda<br />

might have thought of Hollywood's<br />

treatment of a novel by Isabel Allende,<br />

one of his literary disciples. The House<br />

of the Spirits isn't bad in an overtly<br />

offensive way. That is, unless you remember<br />

Allende's splendid novel, on<br />

which this ill-conceived film is based.<br />

Allende's novel is a 50-year political<br />

his<strong>to</strong>ry of Chile seen through the<br />

eyes of one Chilean family. Esteban<br />

Trueba Qeremy Irons) earns a fortune<br />

in gold mines and marries Clara<br />

del Valle (Meryl Streep). They live at<br />

Esteban's huge estate, called Tres<br />

Marias, with his spinster sister Ferula<br />

(Glenn Close).<br />

As the political predominance of<br />

Chile's Conservative Party comes <strong>to</strong><br />

an end, revolution threatens the opulent<br />

Trueba lifestyle. Esteban and<br />

Clara's daughter, Blanca (Winona<br />

Ryder), becomes involved with a revolutionary<br />

peasant (An<strong>to</strong>nio Banderas).<br />

Danish writer/direc<strong>to</strong>r Bille Au-<br />

gust seems <strong>to</strong> have had many problems<br />

adapting Allende's highly<br />

uncinematic noveL The film was shot<br />

on location in Portugal and in Danish<br />

film studios, so the film's ambience is<br />

colonial European rather than Chilean.<br />

A more serious flaw is that entire<br />

characters have been cut from the<br />

film or neglected. What emerges is<br />

The result is<br />

uniformly dull, and<br />

in view of what<br />

went in<strong>to</strong> the<br />

making of this<br />

film, that's a huge<br />

disappointment.<br />

the barest skele<strong>to</strong>n of the book's plot<br />

August's concentration on the novel's<br />

melodrama has shortchanged the socioeconomic<br />

aspects of the rise and<br />

fall of Chilean Communism.<br />

In this context, Allende's <strong>to</strong>uches<br />

of magical realism are wildly out of<br />

place. Clara's clairvoyance and ability<br />

<strong>to</strong> move objects with her mind don't<br />

add <strong>to</strong> your u nderstanding of her character.<br />

Another problem is that August,<br />

who isn't a native English speaker, is<br />

trying <strong>to</strong> adapt a Spanish-language<br />

novel in<strong>to</strong> English. This explains lines<br />

of dialogue such as, "I curse you,<br />

Esteban," and "Papa, you stubborn<br />

old fool!" but doesn't make them any<br />

less hard on the ears.<br />

The hugely talented cast is badly<br />

misused; obviously none of the stars<br />

are remotely Chilean. Streep ages well<br />

during the course of the film, but filmmakers<br />

have long since learned that<br />

you don't getvery far by making Streep<br />

the emotional core of your film. The<br />

script has given her nothing, so she<br />

passes in and out of the film without<br />

making any impression. The character<br />

has none of the spiritual and intellectual<br />

force that Allende conveyed so<br />

powerfully in the noveL<br />

August makes a huge mistake in<br />

having Ryder do the voice-over narration.<br />

Dramatic pictures tend <strong>to</strong> drain<br />

the color from her voice, and this<br />

one's noexception. Her character also<br />

has a daughter, and if there's one<br />

thing Ryder definitely isn't, it's<br />

someone's mother.<br />

But August pulls most of his<br />

punches. He manages one genuine<br />

shock in the whole film an<br />

unobtrusive cut <strong>to</strong> Ryder, lying in the<br />

corner of a room, beaten and <strong>to</strong>rtured<br />

almost beyond recognition by soldiers.<br />

But be<strong>cause</strong> her character is so poorly<br />

developed, you either pity her in an<br />

abstract way (people should not be<br />

treated this way) or you feel sorry for<br />

Ryder as an actress rather than as a<br />

Sampler<br />

FROM PAGE 8<br />

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SON OF ALTERED BEAST<br />

Remix/live albums are annoying.<br />

If you want <strong>to</strong> heara songyou like live,<br />

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hear the tunes played straight, get the<br />

studio album; if you want <strong>to</strong> hear it<br />

<strong>to</strong>ssed around and rocked out, well, I<br />

doubt many live albums have ever<br />

captured the energy of a live show<br />

very well.<br />

Enough bitching; now I get <strong>to</strong> be<br />

hypocritical. I like thisalbum, butthat's<br />

partly be<strong>cause</strong> I never got around <strong>to</strong><br />

getting Altered Beast myself, and so<br />

most of these tunes are new <strong>to</strong> me.<br />

No matter how I look at it, "Devil<br />

With The Green Eyes" is a master-<br />

character.<br />

Thefilmversion of The House of the<br />

Spirits sacrifices the novel's social his<strong>to</strong>ry<br />

and whimsical <strong>to</strong>uches in favor of<br />

trying <strong>to</strong> capture the book's epic sweep<br />

— and be<strong>cause</strong> it's so chopped-up, it<br />

fails even in that The result is uniformly<br />

dull, and in view of what went<br />

in<strong>to</strong> the making of this film, that's a<br />

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piece of pained brilliance. The other<br />

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On the remaining five tracks, all<br />

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"Superdeformed," a tune released,<br />

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benefit album, does much better<br />

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The voice-synth stuff here is<br />

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with DarthVader, which is kinda<br />

cool.<br />

"Don't Cry No Tears," on the other<br />

hand, is a treat—a rockin' Neil Young<br />

cover full of overdriven guitars so thick<br />

you can feel the dirt through the headphones.<br />

So—not all live albums suck. Just<br />

most live albums. Some, like this one,<br />

have the power <strong>to</strong> make you sit up and<br />

wonder why in the hell you didniljust<br />

go see the band the last time they<br />

came through.<br />

And there's something <strong>to</strong> be said<br />

for vicarious pleasure, I guess.<br />

Just don't get me started on remix<br />

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SPORTS THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY, APRIL 8. 1994 11<br />

Rice baseball takes its share of lead in SWC race<br />

by John Fredland<br />

The Rice baseball team, ranked<br />

17th in the nation, <strong>to</strong>ok two of three<br />

games from the 19th-ranked University<br />

of Texas last weekend in Austin.<br />

That enabled Rice <strong>to</strong> move in<strong>to</strong> a<br />

four-way tie for first place in the Southwest<br />

Conference with a 6-3 mark. The<br />

Longhorns are also 6-3, with Texas<br />

Christian University and Texas Tech<br />

University both sporting 4-2 conference<br />

records.<br />

"Anytime you take two out of three<br />

on the road, it's successful," Head<br />

Coach Wayne Graham said. "Taking<br />

two out of three on the road against<br />

Texas is extremely successful."<br />

"Two wins is okay, but I really<br />

wanted the sweep," catcher Jeff<br />

Brannen said.<br />

Success against the Longhorns<br />

meant more than just the opportunity<br />

<strong>to</strong> move up in the standings, according<br />

<strong>to</strong> first baseman Paul Doyle.<br />

"This will show Texas what it will<br />

be like for them in the Big 8," he said.<br />

"There has been a lot of talk about<br />

what conference they are going <strong>to</strong> be<br />

in and what conference we are going<br />

<strong>to</strong> be in. Be<strong>cause</strong> of that, it's good <strong>to</strong><br />

beat them like this."<br />

Pitching wildness denied Rice a<br />

series sweep, as the Longhorns salvaged<br />

the second game of the April 2<br />

doubleheader, 84.<br />

Rice pitchers walked 13 Texas batters<br />

in the second game. Sue of those<br />

batters put on base by walks eventually<br />

crossed the plate.<br />

In the first and final games of the<br />

series, Owl pitchers did not pitch the<br />

Longhorn baiters aggressively, as they<br />

issued 24 walks in the two games.<br />

"We're trying <strong>to</strong> get them <strong>to</strong> do it,<br />

but some of our younger pitchers are<br />

still suffering control problems," Graham<br />

said. "Fortunately they've got<br />

good enough stuff so they can get by<br />

with it We're hoping the control will<br />

improve and the walks will go down."<br />

With the score tied 4-4 in the fifth<br />

inning in the finale, Stephen Larkin<br />

led off with one of the walks against<br />

Owl loser Jim Miller (1-2). Miller retired<br />

the next two Longhorns, but<br />

second baseman Matt Williamson<br />

dropped Jerry Taylor's pop-up in short<br />

right field, allowing Larkin <strong>to</strong> score for<br />

a 5-4 Longhorn lead that the Owls<br />

could not overcome.<br />

In the first game of the doubleheader,<br />

Rice snapped a tie with three<br />

runs in the sixth inning and used hearts<strong>to</strong>pping<br />

relief work fromTim Byrdak<br />

<strong>to</strong> hold off the Longhorns, 8-6.<br />

With the score 4-4, Donald<br />

Aslaksen led off the sixth with a single<br />

<strong>to</strong> center against Longhorn loser Jay<br />

Vaught (6-3). Mark Quinn followed<br />

with another single. When Taylor<br />

bobbled the ball Aslaksen <strong>to</strong>ok third.<br />

He scored when David Brooks<br />

bounced in<strong>to</strong> a force-out, putting the<br />

Owls in the lead. Then, Brooks scored<br />

on a Brannen squeeze bunt and<br />

Williamson doubled home Doyle for a<br />

7-4 advantage.<br />

After that the show belonged <strong>to</strong><br />

Byrdak, who turned in a relief performance<br />

worthy of Harry Houdini.<br />

Shutting down a Longhorn threat<br />

-when he came in<strong>to</strong> the game in the<br />

sixth, Byrdak allowed two runs in the<br />

seventh but closed outTexas with the<br />

bases loaded.<br />

The day before, the Owls used a<br />

four-home run attack <strong>to</strong> rally past the<br />

Longhorns, 12-9.<br />

Just as in the final game of the<br />

series, walks hurt the Owls. Seven<br />

Longhorns pu<strong>to</strong>n base by walks would<br />

eventually score.<br />

Texas was cruising with a 4-0 lead<br />

behind their ace Kj'os, who had given<br />

up only one home run in 59.1 innings<br />

on the season, when Rice turned on<br />

the power in the <strong>to</strong>p of the fifth.<br />

Brooks started the onslaught with<br />

a liner over the fence in left, cutting<br />

the deficit <strong>to</strong> 4-1.<br />

That opened the floodgates. Doyle<br />

beat out an infield single. Brannen<br />

walked on four pitches.<br />

Kjos struck out Williamson for the<br />

second out, but Boni drew another<br />

walk <strong>to</strong> load the bases.<br />

Cruz lined his fourth career grand<br />

slam and 10th homer of the season <strong>to</strong><br />

the opposite field in left center, giving<br />

the Owls a 5-4 advantage.<br />

Texas responded with a run in the<br />

bot<strong>to</strong>m of the fifth <strong>to</strong> tie the game, but<br />

Quinn put the Owls ahead <strong>to</strong> stay in<br />

the <strong>to</strong>p of the sixth, lin ing a so lo homer<br />

<strong>to</strong> left field for a 6-5 lead.<br />

Quinn, who finished eight-for-11 in<br />

the series with six runs and four RBIs,<br />

was named SWC Player of the Week.<br />

The Owls added insurance runs <strong>to</strong><br />

take a 9-5 lead in<strong>to</strong> the bot<strong>to</strong>m of the<br />

eighth and held off twoTexas rallies in<br />

the late innings.<br />

Byrdak pitched in and out of jams<br />

in both innings <strong>to</strong> notch the save.<br />

Aslaksen added insurance with Rice's<br />

fourth homer of the night, a two-run<br />

shot in the ninth.<br />

This weekend, Rice hosts Baylor<br />

University in a 7 p.m. game <strong>to</strong>night,<br />

and a 2 p.m. doubleheader <strong>to</strong>morrow.<br />

The Owls are happy with their position<br />

in the conference race, as they<br />

are perched in first at the halfway<br />

point of the schedule.<br />

"I want a ring, a conference championship,"<br />

Brannen said. "1 don't th in k<br />

Rice has ever won first place, and 1<br />

want that I think we've really got a<br />

good shot <strong>to</strong> win the conferencc, and<br />

I think that's what the team wants."<br />

"It's a good position, be<strong>cause</strong> we<br />

have two out of our last three series at<br />

home, which is a definite advantage,"<br />

Graham said."We played the two<br />

teams that were supposed <strong>to</strong> be the<br />

best, Texas and A&M."<br />

"We've still got <strong>to</strong> do our business.<br />

We've still got a long way <strong>to</strong> go."<br />

Jose Cruz: Rice's Centerfield Messiah sets sights on promised land<br />

by John Fredland<br />

Three days in the life of Rice<br />

centerfielder Jose Cruz, Jr.:<br />

On Thursday afternoon, the Owls<br />

are hosting Oklahoma State University.<br />

The Cowboys come in<strong>to</strong> the game<br />

ranked seventh in the nation, but the<br />

Owls have pulled ahead 5-1 in the<br />

sixth inning. With the bases loaded,<br />

the Cowboys go <strong>to</strong> their bullpen. This<br />

provides some relief, as the new<br />

pitcher strikes out Chris Boni.<br />

Cruz follows Boni <strong>to</strong> the plate. Junior<br />

pulls the ball over the left field<br />

fence, putting the game away with the<br />

grand slam.<br />

Friday night, Oral Roberts University<br />

comes in<strong>to</strong> <strong>to</strong>wn. The Golden<br />

Eagles jump out <strong>to</strong> a quick 2-0 lead in<br />

the <strong>to</strong>p of the first, but Junior, now<br />

batting left-handed, hits a three-run<br />

homer <strong>to</strong> left center.<br />

The Golden Eagles take an 8-5 lead<br />

in<strong>to</strong> the bot<strong>to</strong>m of the ninth, but the<br />

Owls put two men on base with one<br />

out for Cruz.<br />

Junior crushes the pitch in<strong>to</strong> the<br />

night and over the right field fence <strong>to</strong><br />

tie the game.<br />

In the first game of Saturday's<br />

doubleheader, Oral Roberts again<br />

scores two runs in the <strong>to</strong>p of the first<br />

The Owls have the perfect counterpoint<br />

in the-bot<strong>to</strong>m of the inning.<br />

Junior blasts another home run, this<br />

one going <strong>to</strong> almost the same spot as<br />

his game-tying shot the night before.<br />

For his three-day display of power,<br />

Cruz was named national co-player of<br />

the week by Collegiate Baseball. This<br />

honor continues the collection of accolades<br />

and accomplishments that the<br />

sophomore has achieved in his Rice<br />

career, the most significant coming<br />

last season when he was named cofreshman<br />

of the year by Collegiate<br />

Baseball.<br />

Baseball excellence has not been<br />

the domain of just one man named<br />

Jose Cruz, however. Cruz's father Jose<br />

Cruz, Sr., preceded his son with a 19year<br />

major league career with the St<br />

Louis Cardinals, Hous<strong>to</strong>n Astros and<br />

New York Yankees.<br />

Cruz, Sr. graced left field in the<br />

Astrodome during the eighties with<br />

his rainbow-clothed, line-drive hitting<br />

presence.<br />

While his father performed down<br />

on the field, Junior was always with<br />

him or around him.<br />

"He came out a lot of times <strong>to</strong> the<br />

clubhouse, but when the game started<br />

he would play double-headers in the<br />

batting cages," Cruz, Sr. said. "He<br />

did^ like <strong>to</strong> watch as many games.<br />

Hea get Nolan Ryan's kid and Phil<br />

Garner's kid and they used <strong>to</strong> play a lot<br />

of games in the indoor batting cages<br />

that we used <strong>to</strong> have over there."<br />

The fact that he spent his formative<br />

years around a major league clubhouse<br />

and had a celebrated father did<br />


12 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS<br />

With Ronnie Jackson at cox, Steph Keyes, Torrey Folk. Allison Baker and Julie Markwardt are the women's experienced four.<br />

Crew returns encouraging results<br />

by Grant Flowers<br />

On March 25,membersoftheRice<br />

Rowing Club packed in<strong>to</strong> vans and<br />

hauled their Italian racing shells <strong>to</strong><br />

Waco <strong>to</strong> compete in the first annual<br />

Texas Cup, held on the Brazos River.<br />

The women's experienced eight<br />

boat captured fourth place out of six<br />

entries.<br />

Rice finished 15 seconds behind<br />

the winning boat from Wichita State<br />

University, while Drake University<br />

placed second and the University of<br />

Texas at Austin grabbed third.<br />

"We were ten seconds behind<br />

Texas," said Club President Julie<br />

Markwardt "They're our big rival and<br />

we would have liked <strong>to</strong> have done<br />

better against them."<br />

Three or four of the teams from<br />

other universities there were on spring<br />

break," Markwardt said.<br />

"This was more of a practice regatta,<br />

but everyone still <strong>to</strong>ok it seriously.<br />

We did a lot of races and some<br />

of our people raced twice."<br />

The men's experienced four boat<br />

finished 14 seconds behind Texas but<br />

they beat out a strong boat from<br />

Wichita State <strong>to</strong> place second.<br />

The boat consisted of junior Phil<br />

Bradley, senior Michael Harms,<br />

sophomore Justin Gullingsrud and<br />

junior Dave Brain.<br />

"It was one of the best races of the<br />

day," said Markwardt<br />

"Lots of these men on the other<br />

teams are heavyweights, and three of<br />

our four rowers are lightweights, so<br />

they were really pleased with the second-place<br />

finish."<br />

That was my last race and it was<br />

great I think the guys did it for me,"<br />

Harms said. Texas jumped out at the<br />

start and we couldn't see them but we<br />

knew that Wichita was there on the<br />

right We had a low stroke rate but<br />

with an enormous amount of power."<br />

"With about 300 meters left in the<br />

race, we had plenty of extra left <strong>to</strong> give<br />

for the sprint and, by the end, we had<br />

about a boat-length lead over Wichita.<br />

It was a well-run race."<br />

In novice action, the men's eight<br />

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placed second out of four entries and<br />

the women's four finished second out<br />

of seven teams.<br />

The women lost <strong>to</strong> a boat from<br />

Wichita State by a heartbreaking .66<br />

seconds.<br />

"It was a great race," sophomore<br />

Sarah New<strong>to</strong>n said.<br />

"It felt really good <strong>to</strong> go all out and<br />

we're not usually that close. At this last<br />

regatta we weren't all <strong>to</strong>gether, but we<br />

still did pretty well. It's been a good<br />

spring."<br />

The meet is yet another indication<br />

of the growth of the Rowing Club.<br />

Harms, who has been with the<br />

club for three years, is quick <strong>to</strong> point<br />

out how the organization has changed<br />

since its inception four years ago.<br />

"It's gotten more competitive and<br />

more serious," said Harms.<br />

"Back when I first joined we had<br />

just started <strong>to</strong> get a stable sized mass<br />

<strong>to</strong> have a good program. Now it's not<br />

often that we have <strong>to</strong> scrap <strong>to</strong> put<br />

<strong>to</strong>gether a boat"<br />

A large part of how the club decides<br />

who will row is by individual<br />

times on an ergometer machine.<br />

Members compete with one another<br />

by rowing a distance of 2500<br />

meters.<br />

"We have more competition for<br />

spots than we did before," said New<strong>to</strong>n.<br />

.<br />

"Last year most of the ergs were in<br />

the low eleven <strong>to</strong> high ten minute<br />

range, and there are a couple people<br />

this year who have gotten under ten<br />

minutes. Almost all of the people are<br />

in the mid <strong>to</strong> low tens."<br />

The club's workout and practice<br />

schedule has had a lot <strong>to</strong> do with the<br />

team's increasing competitiveness.<br />

They row on both Saturday and<br />

Sunday and one morning during the<br />

week.<br />

In addition there are three land<br />

workouts and two days of voluntary<br />

weightlifting.<br />

The hard work has proven <strong>to</strong> be<br />

beneficial.<br />

"When we started, we didn't expect<br />

<strong>to</strong> be able <strong>to</strong> compete with Texas,"<br />

said Harms. "Now we know we can<br />

compete with them, as long as there<br />

isn't a big weight difference."<br />

The next regatta that the club will<br />

attend is the Great Plains Rowing<br />

Championships in Topeka, Kan., on<br />

Apr. 15-16.<br />

That's our big regatta of the year,<br />

and our whole semester is geared up<br />

with this regatta in mind," Markwardt<br />

said.<br />

"Something like 25 or 30 teams go,<br />

all of the Midwest schools and the<br />

teams fromTexas will be there. Ithink<br />

thatall of our boats haveagood chance<br />

in their individual events, but we don't<br />

have enough people <strong>to</strong> earn the points<br />

<strong>to</strong> win the regatta."<br />

Purity of NCAAs tainted<br />

by television announcers<br />

by Chris Rodgers<br />

After a month of hoops, hype, betting and beer drinking, it's finally<br />

over. No more questions about who's number one and who's got what it<br />

takes <strong>to</strong> win the "Big Dance."<br />

The U niversity of Arkansas Razorbacks are going home <strong>to</strong> Fayetteville<br />

after the season of their dreams. Sixty three other teams are plotting next<br />

year's run, vowing <strong>to</strong> return and, hopefully, stretch their luck a little<br />

further. s<br />

This year's March Madness gave us a great April final and one can't<br />

help feeling a little melancholy at seeing the NCAA <strong>to</strong>urnament come <strong>to</strong><br />

a close.<br />

It will be a long time before<br />

people s<strong>to</strong>p saying "The Shot" and<br />

HIT&<br />

mrw<br />

ScottyThurman's name in the same<br />

breath. You wouldn't be doing the<br />

truth justice by saying it was fantastic.<br />

Try clutch, amazing or unreal.<br />

Those are a few of the adjectives<br />

that I was able <strong>to</strong> utter after getting my breath back.<br />

After all, the Hogs were dead-locked with the underdog Duke University<br />

Blue Devils at 70 with barely a minute left on the clock when<br />

Thurman canned a 22-foot jumper from behind the arc.<br />

As if that wasn't enough Hoosier-esque drama, his three pointer<br />

barely reached over the out-stretched fingertips of Duke's An<strong>to</strong>nio I>ang<br />

as time ticked down <strong>to</strong> zero on the shot clock.<br />

To his credit, Lang couldn't have been playing better defense on<br />

Scotty if he had been in the Razorback guard's ankle-length shorts.<br />

The manner in which the entire game was played made you figure<br />

that it would take something like a buzzer beater for one team <strong>to</strong> put the<br />

other away. The final stayed close throughout, with each team having <strong>to</strong><br />

dig deep and claw their way back from deficits.<br />

It is unfortunate that most of America's major sporting events lack the<br />

drama, sportsmanship and comradery that is inherent in the NCAA<br />

<strong>to</strong>urnament. The trick <strong>to</strong> the mythological allure of the Division I<br />

championship stems from the high quality of its competition.<br />

Everybody gets a shot at the championship and the losers go home,<br />

no matterwhat they were ranked during the regular season. Everything<br />

is settled on the court Is anybody listening in Division I college football?<br />

April has begun and I will miss the excitement of the <strong>to</strong>urnament But<br />

there are a few aspects of it that I am more than glad <strong>to</strong> tell goodbye.<br />

There is an old saying that goes, "If it ain't broke, then don't fix it"<br />

Many would say this about the NCAA <strong>to</strong>urnament. But couldn't we get<br />

rid of those damn television announcers?<br />

It could only serve <strong>to</strong> improve one of the most American of all sports<br />

traditions. I'm sure Arkansas Head Coach Nolan Richardson would<br />

agree with me.<br />

The drawing power of the post-season championship is the game of<br />

basketball being played at one of its highest and, without a doubt, most<br />

inspired levels.<br />

Then why is television placing greater and greater emphasis on knowit-all<br />

announcers who would rather hear themselves talk than watch the<br />

game being played? I use my mute but<strong>to</strong>n more during March Madness<br />

than at any other time of the year.<br />

Those who pay the exorbitant ticket prices for the privilege of<br />

watching in person are spared the agony of listening <strong>to</strong> the likes of Billy<br />

Packer andjim Nantz demonstrate their uncanny flair for the obvious. I<br />

don't mean <strong>to</strong> single out pill or Jim—their broadcasting peers are eqally<br />

as bad.<br />

Here is a typical conversation between a play-by-play man (P.P.) and<br />

a'color-commenta<strong>to</strong>r (C.C.) on a televised game:<br />

P.P. man: "Well, Stew, what are the keys for <strong>to</strong>night's matchup?"<br />

C.C.:" Here it is f$ks: Team A needs <strong>to</strong> score more points than Team<br />

B <strong>to</strong> come away with a vic<strong>to</strong>ry."<br />

P.P. man: That's interesting, Stew. I think thatTeam A must also not<br />

ignore Team B's offense. Coach A will tiy <strong>to</strong> get his guys <strong>to</strong> hold Team<br />

B <strong>to</strong> less points than his team can score."<br />

(Later in the game)<br />

P.P. man: "Number-25 ... uh, no, number-15 Jackson dishes <strong>to</strong><br />

Murphy... er, excuse me Williams for the slam!"<br />

C.C.: "If Team A keeps scoring like this while s<strong>to</strong>pping Team B, they<br />

should be able <strong>to</strong> pull this one out"<br />

I don't know as much about basketball as Rick Pitino, but I am tired<br />

of my intelligence being insulted by two guys in thousand-dollar suits<br />

who have never <strong>to</strong>uched a basketball.<br />

I think that someone making as much money as announcers do <strong>to</strong> talk<br />

about basketball, or any sport, for that matter, should at least be required<br />

<strong>to</strong> take a hoops competency test Since they're called announcers, why<br />

don't they try that?<br />

Next year, all I want <strong>to</strong> hear out of their mouths is the player's name,<br />

stats for the year, position and maybe his home<strong>to</strong>wn. Otherwise, put<br />

them in some syndicated gameshow as a host so that their talents can be<br />

better utilized.<br />

The beauty of the NCAA basketball championship <strong>to</strong>urnament lies in<br />

precision passes, rainbow jumpers and airborne dunks; not in the<br />

gibberish of the broadcast booth. I can't wait till next March rolls around.<br />

My name's Tony.<br />

I decided <strong>to</strong> be Sports Edi<strong>to</strong>r for another semester.<br />

Don't ask me why. I'm probably crazy.<br />

Anyways, I need writers. I need help. Please?<br />

Call me if you want <strong>to</strong> write<br />

@ 527-4801 or 630-8911.<br />

I'm getting pretty desperate. I'll even pay you.


SPORTS THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 13<br />

Junior Valerie Tulloch heaves the shot put at the Bayou Classic last Saturday.<br />

Men's track splits pair<br />

by Frederick Wen<br />

While everyone else was off relaxing and enjoying their time off<br />

during the Spring Reccss and Easter Break, the Rice Men's Track and<br />

Field team had a busy and productive holiday before and after the break.<br />

The Owls crushed Harvard University in the 10th Annual Meeting of<br />

the Minds the Saturday before break at the Rice Track Stadium.<br />

Out of the 16 events they competed in, the Owls dominated 10.<br />

The meet against Harvard was sort of a low-keyed dual meet, kind of<br />

a break for us before the A & M meet," Head Coach Steve Straub said.<br />

Although they lost handily <strong>to</strong> Texas A&M University in the A&M<br />

Triangular with Harvard in College Station, they ran some of their best<br />

times all season lastThursday.The squad finished second <strong>to</strong> A&M's 113point<br />

<strong>to</strong>tal with a score of 58, easily eclipsing Harvard's tally of 18.<br />

Against Harvard, junior Cliff Alexander highlighted the thrashing by<br />

winning the 40Q-mcter hurdles in a time of 51.70. In the process, he<br />

became a National Collegiate Athletic Association Provisional Qualifier,<br />

bringing him very close <strong>to</strong> an au<strong>to</strong>matic bid <strong>to</strong> the Championships.<br />

Junior Ivory Angello broke theold meetrecord in thetriplejumpwith<br />

a 51-7.25, while sophomore Chris Jones swept both the 100- and 200meter<br />

dashes in times of 10.63 and 21.22, respectively.<br />

At the Triangular, freshmen Jason Lunn and Brian Klein both won<br />

their respective events.<br />

Lunn won the 1500-meter run in a time of3:50.05 while Klein won the<br />

800 meters in 1:51.62.<br />

Angello swept past his competi<strong>to</strong>rs in the triple jump with a jump of<br />

52-5.5, almost three feet more than the second place finisher.<br />

Jones won the 100- and 200-meters in 10.61 and 21.12, respectively.<br />

Junior Bryan Bronson and freshman Quin<strong>to</strong>n Milner led aone-two-<br />

»


14 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS<br />

Men's tennis seeking momentum<br />

by Dan litten<br />

The Rice men's tennis team, continuing<br />

its trend of up-and-down play,<br />

will host Texas Tech University on<br />

Su nday, hoping for some momentum.<br />

The tennis team had split its last<br />

six matches, losing the first two of the<br />

six, winning three-straight but then<br />

losing one.<br />

The team kept up that in consistent<br />

play as it split a couple of matches in<br />

the last week against conference opponents.<br />

"We'll definitely beready forTech,"<br />

freshman Ricojacober said. "The win<br />

over [Southern Methodist University J<br />

was a good confidence-builder for the<br />

whole team be<strong>cause</strong> we were sick but<br />

we were still able <strong>to</strong> beat a <strong>to</strong>ugh<br />

opponent"<br />

On April 1, the Owls lost <strong>to</strong> Texas<br />

Christian University, but the Owls<br />

bounced back the next day <strong>to</strong> defeat<br />

SMU.<br />

TCU, ranked second in the Southwest<br />

Conference and eighth in the<br />

country, won every match in straight<br />

sets over the Owls while playing at<br />

home in Fort Worth.<br />

"They just outplayed us," said Head<br />

Coach Larry Turville. "We had some<br />

close matches but they fairly well dominated<br />

us."<br />

In the latest Rolex Collegiate<br />

Rankings where TCU was ranked<br />

eighth in the country, Rice was ranked<br />

49th.<br />

Injuries also played a role in Rice's<br />

defeat<br />

"[Sophomore] Jon Elsberry is out<br />

for the rest of the season," Turville<br />

said. "That- phts a dent in our program."<br />

Senior Willie Dann, normally playing<br />

in the number-two singles position.<br />

was unable <strong>to</strong> compete against<br />

TCU as he was out with the flu.<br />

To add <strong>to</strong> the depth problem, senior<br />

Pascal Hos was able <strong>to</strong> play<br />

doubles, but stayed out of the singles<br />

action.<br />

"Pascal is still a little rusty, he's<br />

been out for a month," said Turville.<br />

The Owls d idn't have much time <strong>to</strong><br />

rest their aching and ailing bodies<br />

before facing SMU in Dallas the following<br />

day, but they still managed <strong>to</strong><br />

pull out a <strong>to</strong>ugh 4-3 vic<strong>to</strong>ry over the<br />

Mustangs.<br />

The win over [Southern<br />

Methodist University] was<br />

a good confidence-builder<br />

for the whole team be<strong>cause</strong><br />

we ivere sick bu t we were<br />

still able <strong>to</strong> beat a <strong>to</strong>ugh<br />

opponent.'<br />

— Rico Jacober<br />

Freshman tennis player<br />

Dann returned <strong>to</strong> action, teaming<br />

withjunior Justin Reizes <strong>to</strong> squeak out<br />

a 9-8 pro set vic<strong>to</strong>ry at first doubles.<br />

SMU then <strong>to</strong>ok the second and<br />

third doubles matches, winning the<br />

lone point awarded for doubles play.<br />

Rice came back strong in singles<br />

play, winning four of the six matches.<br />

Dann crushed his opponent at second<br />

singles, 6-2, 6-0.<br />

Junior Nick Lorenzini came<br />

through at fifth singles with a 6-2, 6-4<br />

vic<strong>to</strong>ry.<br />

After two <strong>to</strong>ugh losses for Rice at<br />

first and fourth singles, SMU led 3-2 in<br />

the overall match.<br />

Jacober then evened the score with<br />

his <strong>to</strong>ugh three-set win at the sixthsingles<br />

spot<br />

After losing the first set 2-6, Jacober<br />

knew he had <strong>to</strong> change something.<br />

"I was very tired out there be<strong>cause</strong><br />

I've been sick. I'm still not 100 percent<br />

and I started slowly," he said.<br />

"But in the second set, I started<br />

coming in more. I became more aggressive<br />

in coming <strong>to</strong> the net and<br />

that's how I closed it out"<br />

His new strategy paid off as he<br />

<strong>to</strong>ok the second and third sets for a<br />

2-6,6-4,6-2 vic<strong>to</strong>ry.<br />

With the match then tied 3-3, Reizes<br />

pulled out another gutsy win <strong>to</strong> claim<br />

the vic<strong>to</strong>ry for Rice.<br />

Reizes was down 5-0 in the first set<br />

but he then came on strong, pulling<br />

ahead at 6-5 before losing in a<br />

tiebreaker.<br />

In the second set, he was down<br />

again, this time by a break before<br />

staging another comeback for a 6-7,<br />

7-5,6-3 win<br />

"I picked myself up," Reizes said."I<br />

wasn't playing <strong>to</strong>o well but I fought<br />

well."<br />

Reizes' triumph gave the Owls the<br />

contest by a 4-3 score.<br />

"He [ReizesJ lost at number three<br />

the week before at A&M, so it was<br />

good <strong>to</strong> see him win," said Turville.<br />

"We played a good match against SMU<br />

in singles. We hung in there pretty<br />

well."<br />

"They had their chances <strong>to</strong> beat us<br />

but we dug in and won it," he said.<br />

"Our big thing now is <strong>to</strong> beat Texas<br />

Tech. That will definitely cement us at<br />

number four."<br />

The. week after the Texas Tech<br />

match-up, Rice will host the University<br />

of Texas, ranked second in the<br />

nation, in its final tune-up before competing<br />

in the Southwest Conference<br />

Championships on April 22.<br />

TheSWC Championships will also<br />

be held at Jake Hess Stadium.<br />

Women <strong>to</strong> battle A&M<br />

by Peter S<strong>to</strong>kes<br />

The women's tennis team has its sights set on Texas A&M University<br />

After gunning down Southern Methodist University and Baylor University<br />

last week. The Owls will take on the Aggies <strong>to</strong>morrow at 1:30.<br />

This match promises <strong>to</strong> be "a big showdown," according <strong>to</strong> Assistant<br />

Coach Emily Schaefer. Rice is 3-1 in Southwest Conference play, and the<br />

winnerwillhavetheinsidetrackon second place. Schaefer hopes thatthe<br />

Owls' home-court advantage will give them the edge against the nationally-rankcd<br />

Aggies.<br />

The Owls positioned themselves for this challenge with a pair of<br />

convincing wins. On April 2, the Owls stuffed SMU 7-2.<br />

Top soloist An<strong>to</strong>nette Vcloso was s<strong>to</strong>pped at first singles by Klysia<br />

Thorn<strong>to</strong>n, 6-3,6-1. However, freshman Paula Myslivecck <strong>to</strong>ok control of<br />

the second slot and downed Anne Brown, 6-1, 7-6.<br />

Junior Jackie Brown rolled <strong>to</strong> a 7-5,6-1 vic<strong>to</strong>ry over Nicole Woods at<br />

third singles. Senior Abby Daniels gotin<strong>to</strong> trouble early, but pounded out<br />

a 3-6,7-5,7-5 triumph over Renee Greyvensteyn at fourth singles.<br />

Freshman Jessica Gagnon slipped by I^dy Mustang fifth seed Carolin<br />

Knobelspies 7-5, 6-3, and senior Blair Strassner bowled over Catherine<br />

Hammonds at sixth singles, 6-2,6-1.<br />

"We really <strong>to</strong>ok them in singles," said Myslivecck.<br />

Daniels and Myslivecck won by default at first doubles. Brown and<br />

Veloso had <strong>to</strong> work hard at second doubles, but they won, 6-2,6-2.<br />

Greyvensteyn and Hammonds saved some face for SMU with a 6-4,<br />

2-6,6-3 win over Gagnon and freshman Olga Iim6n at third doubles.<br />

Three days later, the Owls outslugged Baylor 6-3.<br />

Myslivecek moved up <strong>to</strong> first singles and dispatched Greta Gibson<br />

6-4,6-1. However, Veloso suffered a 6-2,6-1 defeat at the hands of Baylor<br />

second-seed Melissa Castro.<br />

Brown avenged the loss with a 7-6,6-2 win over Sarah Chester at th ird<br />

singles. Daniels again dropped the first set, but fought back for a 4-6,<br />

6-4,6-3 vic<strong>to</strong>ry over Baylor's Carolyn McGrath.<br />

Gagnon edged Baylor fifth seed Amber Simpson 7-5,6-3, and Blair<br />

Strassner rallied past Julie Hamil<strong>to</strong>n at sixth singles, 2-6, 7-6,6-1.<br />

"Our seniors really did a great job for us, particularly Blair," said Head<br />

Coach Paul Blankenship.<br />

Castro and Gibson overpowered Daniels and Myslivecck, 3-6, 6-0,<br />

6-4. However, Strassner and Veloso pulled <strong>to</strong>gether for a 6-2,6-2 thrashing<br />

of Chester and McGrath. Gagnon and Limon dropped a <strong>to</strong>ugh threeset<br />

match <strong>to</strong> Hamil<strong>to</strong>n and Simpson at the final doubles, 6-1, 4-6,6-3.<br />

"Baylor was really strong and really intense," said Schaefer. "Our<br />

team stayed persistant and played smart. We played mentally <strong>to</strong>ugh."<br />

Thisvic<strong>to</strong>ry also gave the Owls some encouraging news for Saturday's<br />

matchup. The Aggies were only 5-4 winners over the Iiidy Bears.<br />

"We're going <strong>to</strong> have <strong>to</strong> play strong singles," said Myslivecck. "Next<br />

<strong>to</strong> [the University ofj Texas, this is probably our <strong>to</strong>ughest match."<br />

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SPORTS THE RICE THRESHER FRIDAY. APRIL 8, 1994 15<br />

Herds<br />

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ToCut<br />

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Students Save UpTo $ 75 On American Airlines Tickets.<br />

& com?.<br />

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For reservations or instructions, call your Travel Agent or American Airlines at 1-800-237-7981. AIR TRAVEL MUST BE COMPLETED BY OCTOBER 15,1994. •<br />

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Ready for a little off-campus activity? Just present the above certificate along with your valid student I.D., and save big on air fare <strong>to</strong> anywhere<br />

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16 FRIDAY, APRIL 8, 1994 THE RICE THRESHER BACKPAGE<br />

The backpage Is Not A Joke!!!<br />

CLASSIFIEDS<br />

Bone Loss in Young Women With<br />

Menstrual Problems<br />

Young women with absent or infrequent<br />

menstrual periods may be losing<br />

bone at a time when their bone<br />

density should be stable or increasing.<br />

Baylor College of Medicine is conducting<br />

a study of bone density and<br />

body calcium in 14-25 year old females<br />

who have infrequent or absent<br />

menstrual periods and who are not on<br />

hormones currently. The study will<br />

require a commitment of 12 months.<br />

The initial tests, if done on your own,<br />

would cost approximately $2,000.<br />

They are paid for as part of the study.<br />

For more information, contact Susan<br />

Carter 770-1736 or Dr. Albert<br />

Hergenroeder 770-3659.<br />

ADOPTION- A home full of love,<br />

laughter, and Christian values await<br />

your baby. Financial <strong>security</strong> and<br />

educational opportunities are priorities.<br />

Hous<strong>to</strong>n couple wishes <strong>to</strong> share<br />

open adoption with you. Call Tom<br />

and Paige 496-1860.<br />

Greeks & Clubs: EARN $50 - $250<br />

For Yourself<br />

Plus up <strong>to</strong> S500 for your club'. This<br />

fundraiser costs nothing and lasts one<br />

week. Call now and receive a free gift.<br />

1-800-932-0528, Ext. 65.<br />

Roommate from Hell? Max dorm<br />

db? Homeless? Try the INTERNA-<br />

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Small, quiet (usually) dorm offering<br />

large furnished private rooms, all utilities,<br />

full kitchen, video room, game<br />

room, laundry, free local phone.<br />

S295.00 a month for a one year lease.<br />

Shared rooms from SI85.00 per person.<br />

Summer leases available. Tobacco<br />

and alcohol free. Call Jim at<br />

237-8443 day, 674-2528 nights for<br />

information or <strong>to</strong> see.<br />

First Christian Church, 1601 Sunset.<br />

Do something meaningful for<br />

yourself and your community. Sunday<br />

Services: 10:50 a.m, 6:30 p.m.<br />

Sunday night supper 5:45 free with<br />

Rice ID. John Cunyus, Baker '84,<br />

Minister.<br />

HELP WANTED<br />

Looking For Adventure) Adventure<br />

Bay, Hous<strong>to</strong>n's newest waterpark is<br />

seeking applicants for the '94 season.<br />

Prospective employees must have pro -<br />

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Summer Babysitter wanted. M-F, 8-<br />

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area. Must have car. $5/hour. Call<br />

951 -9137 for interview.<br />

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opportunity <strong>to</strong> grow, leam and make a<br />

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looking for responsible student. Room<br />

and board in exchange for light<br />

babysitting and cleaning. Children are<br />

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<strong>to</strong> campus and village. Call<br />

Colette at 668-7250.<br />

NOTES &<br />

NOTICES<br />

Career Services: Rejection letter party<br />

April 12, 10 p.m. at Willy's Pub.<br />

Auditions for the Mixed Signals cast<br />

for O-Week 1994, will be held Monday,<br />

April 11, and Wednesday, April<br />

13, at 7 p.m. in Hamman Hall audi<strong>to</strong>rium.<br />

Seeking 3 men and 3 women for<br />

acting roles. All new script. For more<br />

information, please call Robin Holzer<br />

at 432-0386.<br />

Rice Young Democrats present Rep.<br />

Scott Hochberg, the only Rice grad in<br />

the Texas Legislature. Thursday, April<br />

14th, 7:30 p.m. in Rayzor Hall 111.<br />

Elections for next year's offices will<br />

follow the presentation. All are welcome<br />

<strong>to</strong> attend.<br />

Rice Counseling Center will present<br />

an interactive workshop — Finding<br />

Balance in Life: Managing a Life in the<br />

Midst of Finals. Wednesday, April 13,<br />

6:00-6:45 p.m. Sid Richardson PDR<br />

Lecture on "Human Rights in Guatemala"<br />

by author Jennifer Harbury.<br />

Tuesday, April 12 at Farrlsworth<br />

Pavillion (student center), 7:30 p.m.<br />

sponsored by the RPC Students' Speakers<br />

Forum and Guatemala Support<br />

Network.<br />

Hosts needed for Owl Day 1994!<br />

SAC needs 300 volunteers <strong>to</strong> host<br />

prospective <strong>students</strong> next weekend,<br />

April 14-16. Contact the SAC office<br />

or fill out a "host card" at your college.<br />

Still looking for gainful employment?<br />

Come <strong>to</strong> The Very Last Minute Job<br />

Search. Career Services Center, April<br />

12 at 4 p.m.<br />

Is your personal cookbook limited <strong>to</strong><br />

1-8OO-DOMINOS? Learn Survival<br />

CookingTechniques. Yet another episode<br />

in the Life Beyond the Hedges<br />

Series. Coming <strong>to</strong> Farnsworth Pavillion,<br />

April 13 at 4 p.m.<br />

Is your business wardrode beginning<br />

<strong>to</strong> rot? Why not leam about Building<br />

a Professional Wardrobe? Another addition<br />

<strong>to</strong> the Life Beyond the Hedges<br />

Series. Appearing at the Miner Lounge,<br />

April 14 at 7 p.m.<br />

MCAT scores <strong>to</strong>o low? Daniel Hu will<br />

be discussing Careers in Law. Sewall<br />

Hall 303, April 12 at 7 p.m.<br />

Why are there so many<br />

fucking classified ads this<br />

week? Our true wit, humor,<br />

and charm just doesn't have<br />

the space <strong>to</strong> shine through!<br />

To my mother - bite me.<br />

A W0RP FROM YOUR NEW EJPEs.<br />

Adam's Column<br />

Someone recently said <strong>to</strong> me, "Hey you, I know<br />

you, you're a sensitive, caring, 90's sort of guy.<br />

Why don't you run for BPE?" So I brought it up<br />

at my co-dependents meeting and they all agreed<br />

that I should REFORM THE BACKPAGE. I<br />

mean, I'm in <strong>to</strong>uch with my feminine side. Words<br />

like penis, ass and fuck hurt me, <strong>to</strong>o. There is just<br />

no excuse for such language and humor in a<br />

clean-cut, family-oriented paper such as the<br />

Thresher. After all, this is Rice, and no one here<br />

who is aware of the feelings of others would find<br />

such subject matter humorous. So my goal, as<br />

backpage edi<strong>to</strong>r, is <strong>to</strong> create a U<strong>to</strong>pia of peace,<br />

love,andunderstandingatRice University through<br />

the publication of the Backpage. Thank you and<br />

suck the bitch dry.<br />

MISCLASS<br />

In the Chicago Tribune:<br />

"But how do you master that elusive<br />

skill known as <strong>to</strong>uch?"<br />

—Don't ask the guys on this campus<br />

We have no fucking room for<br />

anything else, it's not like any of you<br />

submit anything anyway!<br />

If the President of the United States<br />

can find the time <strong>to</strong> jog every day,<br />

why can't our SA president???<br />

—or even Buns of Steel?<br />

From Dan-Dan the Party Man - "I<br />

need bigger panties! Don't you have<br />

anything besides g-strings?"<br />

Bite me. You pussy-whipped guys make me<br />

sick! Look, I'm a modern woman, and I love the<br />

Backpage the way it is. Just be<strong>cause</strong> I have a<br />

cli<strong>to</strong>ris doesn't mean I can't take a joke! You're<br />

right, rape is not a joke, but the backpage is. I bet<br />

on those lonely nights half the guys on this<br />

campus whack off <strong>to</strong> the Backpage! And probably<br />

a third of the girls—excuse me—womyn.<br />

I think the fucking language is hysterical and<br />

quite frankly, arousing. In fact, Eric S<strong>to</strong>tts's humor<br />

brought me <strong>to</strong> climax more times than any<br />

of the fucks on this campus. So all I have <strong>to</strong> say<br />

<strong>to</strong> you, Adam, is CRANK IT UP AND GRAB<br />

YOUR ANKLES be<strong>cause</strong> there are no ife, ands<br />

or buts about it—you're spending the Backpage<br />

with me and all my charm.<br />

Today, April 8th, "How <strong>to</strong> Think, feel or Say Precisely the Most<br />

Inappropriate Thing for Any Occasion" by Dan Wegner, 309 Sewall<br />

at 3 p.m. WE DID NOT MAKE THIS UP (although we may be guest<br />

speakers).<br />

Tonight, April 8th<br />

April 9th<br />

CALENDAR<br />

.... Wiess JamFest TG& Party<br />

Hanszen (sux) College Night<br />

SID College Night<br />

Spring Galves<strong>to</strong>n Trip<br />

SRC Party<br />

April 11 and April 13th, auditiqns for Mixed Signals cast will be held<br />

at 7pm in Hamman Hall.<br />

• Time and date unknown — I shoot those fucking Wiess people who<br />

bellow at my window every time they get drunk.<br />

Earn $10 <strong>to</strong> $15 an hour<br />

teaching part-time for the<br />

The Prince<strong>to</strong>n Review<br />

The Prince<strong>to</strong>n Review, the nation's leading test preparation<br />

companyris looking for classroom instruc<strong>to</strong>rs <strong>to</strong> prepare <strong>students</strong><br />

for the SAT.<br />

What You Get...<br />

FLEXIBLE HOURS: 8-15 hours/week in the evening and on<br />

weekends.<br />

EXCELLENT PAY: Instruc<strong>to</strong>r pay from $10 <strong>to</strong> $15 an hour.<br />

RAPID merit-based evaluation and raises.<br />

COMPLETE (and paid) training.<br />

We have several different<br />

locations and course schedules<br />

in the Greater Hous<strong>to</strong>n area.<br />

Course training is starting<br />

soon. If you want a shot at the<br />

best part-time job anywhere,<br />

call us now!<br />

THE<br />

PRINCETON<br />

REVIEW<br />

We Score More!<br />

The Col<strong>to</strong>g* Bowd ETS. and Prtncelon U are not nftAa<strong>to</strong>d with fh« Prince<strong>to</strong>n Review<br />

... What We Need.<br />

BACKGROUND: Must be a <strong>to</strong>p scorer on the<br />

SAT.<br />

PERSONALITY: YOU must be dynamic and<br />

outgoing—personable and inspiring?<br />

RELIABILITY: We need you <strong>to</strong> be available<br />

for at least 12 months.<br />

Call us at<br />

688-5500<br />

and tell us you saw this<br />

offer in the Thresher.

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