Sexual Assault Advocate Training Manual - Texas Association ...

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S E X U A L A S S A U L T A D V O C A T E T R A I N I N G M A N U A L make the sound come up from your diaphragm rather than your throat. You might also practice yelling "NO!" rather than simply making a noise. Some people argue against yelling as a strategy on the basis that it may lead to the rapist trying to "shut up" his intended victim by killing or seriously injuring her. This is not likely to happen, but does not mean it will never happen, but only that the odds are against it. This is especially true if the woman begins yelling as soon as she is confronted by the rapist. At this point he has not yet committed a serious crime and his easiest option is simply to leave. If he decides to stay he probably will threaten the victim with serious consequences if she does not agree to be quiet. The woman who is being threatened will have to decide how seriously to take his threats and what her safest course of action is. If he is threatening to shut you up, these are things to remember, consider and feed into your intuition: bHe means you harm, in any case, no matter what you do. bIf he says he will not hurt you if you will just be quiet, possibly what he means is that he will only rape you; he probably does not understand that rape hurts. bIt can make a difference whether or not you have reason to believe that anyone else will hear you yelling and come to your aid. bIf he is like most rapists, he will not intentionally kill you. He knows that murder is a crime, and he does not see himself as a criminal. He may not even realize that what he is doing is rape, or it may be that he does not think rape is really a crime. bLet your intuition be your guide. Remember that it is on your side. Usually your intuitive feeling about the best thing to do will be right. It is unfortunate that the issue of physical resistance against rape has become controversial. Women should not be made to feel either that they must fight back against rapists or that they cannot fight back. Experts are free to take extreme positions and argue with each other over the question of physical resistance. Women confronted by rapists do not have that kind of freedom and they certainly have no time for arguments. Important to give women accurate information relevant to resistance, rather than dogmatic opinions about which resistance strategy is the best. 238
S E X U A L A S S A U L T A D V O C A T E T R A I N I N G M A N U A L In doing research on rape avoidance, different scientists in different parts of the country interviewed hundreds of women who had been raped and women who had successfully resisted a rape attack. They found that the most effective reaction to a sexual assault was to run away. The second most effective strategy, and the most effective strategy in situations where running away was not immediately possible, was physical resistance. That does not mean that fighting back is always the best option. It is still important for the woman to trust her own intuition and make her own decision in any situation. At the same time, however, while women must not feel compelled to fight attackers in every situation, they also should be able to choose physical resistance without being restricted by mistaken fears about resistance. Some of the rape prevention education of the past has made women more afraid of resistance than of rape. Women have been told that if they fight back they are only asking to get murdered as well, whereas if they would just passively submit they would only get raped. This mistaken idea has probably done more harm than any of the other myths about rape. There are some things we can say now to counteract some of the damage that has been done. You do not endanger yourself by resisting a rapist. If you are facing a man who intends to rape you, you are already in danger. You did not create this danger; he did. Most rapists are not murderers. As we have already said, most rapists see murderers as criminals, but do not think of themselves as criminals. They do not think of rape as a crime, and they do not understand the devastating effects of rape on their victims. The majority of rapists are insecure men with weak egos. Their main weapon is intimidation, and threats which are often bluffs. Many of them can fairly easily be intimidated. The rapists who kill intend to kill. They intend to kill before the victim does anything. They intend to kill regardless of what their intended victims do. They do not kill in response to their victim’s resistance, but in response to their own inner urges. The odds are low for encountering a sadistic (killer) rapist, but it can happen. Your only chance for survival is escape and your only chance for escape is some kind of resistance. Your best chance to escape is to try every kind of resistance strategy that you can. You lose nothing by trying everything you can. Most women do not know how strong they are, for they do not test their strength as many men do. Most women are stronger than they realize. Having and carrying babies, scrubbing floors, carrying laundry around, many of the 239
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