PacificSD's - Pacific San Diego Magazine

love
(Continued from page 68 )
DATE
TANDY: Your cat? Awww!
Bachelor #2, what action
figure best describes you?
BACHELOR #2: Lion-O
from ThunderCats. That is
the man right there.
TANDY: Aww, get it!
Good one! That’s a good
one. Bachelor #3, if I were
stranded on a deserted island,
how would you save me?
BACHELOR #3: To be
honest, I think I’d have to
put on my flip-flops and
walk on water to save you.
TANDY: Look what you’re
doing to these girls in the
audience. That’s the perfect
man right there. Bachelor
#1, assuming you’re really
loud while making whoopee,
give me an idea of what that
might sound like.
BACHELOR #1: Oompa,
loompa, doom-pa-dee-do!
TANDY: Now, does that
reveal your height? All right,
let’s hear from Bachelor #3.
What would the theme song
of our first date be? Don’t
pick “Toot It And Boot It.”
That won’t win anything.
BACHELOR #3: Ok, have
you ever seen Chariots of Fire?
TANDY: No.
BACHELOR #3: Aww, has
anyone here seen Chariots
of Fire? Okay, we’ve got one
in the audience. The guy,
he’s singing, dun-dun-dundun-duh,
and he’s running
in slow motion? That is epic.
That’s the theme song.
TANDY: When did that
movie come out?
BACHELOR #3:
Like, 80s. I was
probably—I don’t
know what I was
when it came out.
TANDY: Oh, that was
close. You can’t tell me
your age. Ok, does
anybody in the crowd
have any good ones?
TANDY: Bachelor #1,
why should I pick you?
That’s a good one.
BACHELOR #1:
Because I’m drinking
a Coors Light.
TANDY: Bachelor #2,
why should I pick you?
BACHELOR #2: Right,
we’re all drinking Coors
Light. Well, you should pick
me because, one, I know
we’re going to have a great
time, I’m going to make you
laugh, I’m sarcastic, I can tell
you’re witty, you’re quick, I
think our wits would match
well, and I’d like to see where
we can take it from there.
TANDY: All right, that’s a
good answer. Bachelor #3,
why should I pick you?
BACHELOR #3: This is the
guy that’s going to fly—to
walk on water, I mean. What
else do you need?
Host: Ok Tandy, that’s it for
the questions. Now you can take
a second to think about whom
you want to pick. Crowd, go
ahead and help her out. Whom
do you think she should pick?
TANDY: Man, I really, really
liked #2’s last answer. All right
think of a good one, one last
question. Bachelor #1, what
would we do tonight? Where
would we go, what kind of
date would we have?
BACHELOR #1: We would
have some wine and cheese
and talk, get to know each
other.
TANDY: Ugh, really?
Number two?
BACHELOR #2: Okay, let me
ask you some questions. What
would you like to do tonight?
TANDY: Oh, you’re going to
switch it up on me, huh?
BACHELOR #2: Well, yeah,
in order to make plans, I
would have to get to know
you better right?
TANDY: Shoot.
BACHELOR #2: Do you
like to dance?
TANDY: Yes.
BACHELOR #2: Ok, we
can start with that. We’re
already having drinks and
getting into it.
TANDY: You’re losing it; it’s
slippin’.
BACHELOR #2: All right,
here’s what we’re going to do:
grab a drink, get a bite to eat,
get something in our system
and get to know each other
a little bit better, crack some
jokes, laugh a little bit and
then enjoy the rest of the night
and see where it takes us.
TANDY: And you, #3?
BACHELOR #3: Well, after
Bachelor #2 is done with
you…
TANDY: Ew!
BACHELOR #3: I’ll pick you
up and save you. No disrespect.
I think tonight we’re going
to enjoy Bar West with some
appetizers and probably get
on with whatever agenda they
have planned for us to support
Bar West and Coors Light. But
after that, to be honest, I think
if I’m going to give up sex for a
year then we’ll just have some
good conversation.
Host: Ok, Tandy you’re up.
Who do you pick?
TANDY:I think I’m still
going to go with Bachelor #2
Host: Ok, Bachelor #2 is the
winner! Let’s give him a hand
everyone! Ok,
Tandy, now let’s meet the guys
you did not pick.
Host: Ok, Tandy, it’s time
to meet your date. Bachelor
#2, come on down! On behalf
of PacificSD and Bar West,
thank you all so much! Stick
around—we’ll buy you more
drinks.
(Continued on page 72 )
70 pacificsandiego.com {February 2011}