BILLY BUNTER'S Big Top Page 1 of 97 - Friardale

BILLY BUNTER’S Big Top
‘Oh! Yes! Of course! N-n-n-never heard the name in my life!’
‘If you have seen him, however, you would probably remember him—an
extremely fat boy in glasses—’
‘Oh! Ah! No! Never seen him in my life, sir. He—he’s not here! No good
looking in this van for him, Mr. Quelch!’
‘I was not thinking of looking in your van for him, sir,’ said the Remove master
tartly. ‘But I believe he’s in your circus.’
‘Oh! No! I am sure not! Absolutely certain that he’s not anywhere about here,
sir! He wouldn’t be admitted! I—I think he’s at Lantham.’
‘What?’
‘In—in fact, I’m sure he’s at Lantham, sir, or—or Canterbury! I think if you go
to Canterbury, sir—or—or Folkestone—’
Impossible! Even so foolish a boy cannot have gone there! Have you any
reason to suppose that he has done so, Mr. Whiffles?’
‘Yes; lots! I—I saw him in Canterbury this afternoon, sir, when I was at—at
Folkestone!’ gasped Bunter.
‘Wha-a-at!’
‘I—I—I mean——’
‘Really, Mr. Whiffles—’
‘I—I mean, I saw him at Folkstone, sir, when I was at Canterbury,’ gasped
Bunter. ‘That is to say, I—I mean—’ Bunter was a little confused. The glint in
Mr. Quelch’s gimlet-like eyes was quite disconcerting.
‘If you know anything of the boy, Mr. Whiffles—’
‘Oh, yes! I—I think I—I saw him at Lantham—’
‘You know him by sight?’
‘Oh! No! Never seen him in my life, sir!’ said Bunter promptly. ‘Never heard of
him till you mentioned him, sir.’
Mr. Quelch sniffed. He could only conclude that this fat circus man had been
drinking.
‘I have come here, sir, to look for him,’ he said. ‘The boy is to receive
punishment when he returns to the school—severe punishment——’
‘Oh, lor’!’
‘I think for that reason, he may be staying out of gates. The boy is I regret to
say, absolutely stupid.’
‘Oh, really sir——’
‘It is possible—indeed, probable—in view of his unexampled stupidity, that he
may have remained here for the second performance at your circus, sir. I
think he may be among the audience at the present moment.’
‘Oh! Good!’ gasped Bunter.
‘What?’
‘I—I mean, bad—very bad—awful, in fact!’ gasped the Owl of the Remove.
‘Shocking!’
‘You must excuse me for troubling you, Mr. Whiffles, but I am very anxious
about the boy. May I beg your assistance in discovering him and placing him
in my hands?’
‘No jolly fear!’ gasped Bunter.
‘Mr. Whiffles! What—’
‘I—I mean—I mean, certainly! Right on the spot! I—I—I—I’ll help round up the
young—the young scoundrel!’ gasped the fat gentleman in the van. ‘He’s in
the tent all right—in fact, I saw him go in’
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