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is there a place for heavenly mother in mormon theology?

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S U N S T O N E<br />

All-See<strong>in</strong>g Eye<br />

TOO “ANXIOUSLY ENGAGED?” HERE’S HELP!<br />

MoGo <strong>is</strong> a spiritually correct<br />

<strong>for</strong>mulation featur<strong>in</strong>g traditional<br />

herbs used <strong>for</strong> centuries by our<br />

brothers and s<strong>is</strong>ters <strong>in</strong> Ch<strong>in</strong>a and<br />

South America. Ingredients <strong>in</strong>clude<br />

yorba maté, ma huang, g<strong>in</strong>seng,<br />

and guarana. Our guarantee: if<br />

you fail your temple recommend<br />

<strong>in</strong>terview, we’ll refund your money!<br />

www.thesugarbeet.com<br />

In the Belly of the Whale<br />

CHOOSE THIS DAY WHOM<br />

YOU WILL SERVE<br />

EDITOR’S NOTE: We’re excited to announce a new Cornucopia<br />

column, “In the Belly of the Whale,” <strong>in</strong> which Todd Robert Petersen<br />

will <strong>in</strong>vestigate Mormon culture, art, and politics from the perspective<br />

of a baptized outsider. Todd <strong>is</strong> a writer and humor<strong>is</strong>t who teaches<br />

at Southern Utah University. H<strong>is</strong> work has appeared <strong>in</strong> Cream City<br />

Review, Weber Studies, Third Coast, W<strong>is</strong>cons<strong>in</strong> Review,<br />

Dialogue, and SUNSTONE. He <strong>is</strong> also an editor-at-large <strong>for</strong> The<br />

Sugar Beet, a satirical publication of Mormon news and culture.<br />

SUMMER’S HERE, AND IT’S FAMILY REUNION TIME<br />

aga<strong>in</strong> <strong>in</strong> Zion, which <strong>is</strong> one of the th<strong>in</strong>gs I like least<br />

about be<strong>in</strong>g a Mormon. I know I should be more charitable<br />

toward people who like family reunions; but you see, I<br />

was ra<strong>is</strong>ed Catholic, and <strong>for</strong> us, a family reunion <strong>is</strong>n’t <strong>in</strong> full<br />

sw<strong>in</strong>g until someone <strong>is</strong> drunk and yell<strong>in</strong>g, or drunk and<br />

cry<strong>in</strong>g, usually both.<br />

On the other hand, reunions with my wife’s Mormon family<br />

(complete with their handcart pedigree) don’t get <strong>in</strong>to full<br />

sw<strong>in</strong>g until someone has wept through a testimony on the<br />

power of hav<strong>in</strong>g good roommates, per<strong>for</strong>med “I Am a Child of<br />

God” on an autoharp, or blasted h<strong>is</strong> tw<strong>in</strong> brother <strong>in</strong> the face<br />

with hornet spray. Sometimes, when we’re lucky, we can get all<br />

three happen<strong>in</strong>g at once. And I would be ly<strong>in</strong>g if I didn’t admit<br />

some pleasure <strong>in</strong> a comb<strong>in</strong>ation like that.<br />

I guess s<strong>in</strong>ce I’m be<strong>in</strong>g honest I should admit that I keep<br />

busy <strong>in</strong> the summers so I’ll have a legitimate excuse <strong>for</strong> begg<strong>in</strong>g<br />

out of reunions. I know that families can be together <strong>for</strong>ever,<br />

even though I jo<strong>in</strong>ed the Church n<strong>in</strong>e years after Primary<br />

would have been an option. But just because families can be<br />

together doesn’t mean that they should or that they’ll enjoy it.<br />

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m k<strong>in</strong>d of Scroogey about that.<br />

Normally <strong>in</strong> my role as the snotty Engl<strong>is</strong>h professor, I huddle<br />

together with my cronies <strong>in</strong> the hallway and natter along about<br />

Michael Moore films, xeric garden<strong>in</strong>g, Walter Benjam<strong>in</strong>/Pater/<br />

Whitman/Cronkite, or laugh at jokes with punch l<strong>in</strong>es like,<br />

“With vice-presidents like that, who needs enemies?” But<br />

dur<strong>in</strong>g a family reunion, I’m relegated to conversations about<br />

th<strong>in</strong>gs like, well . . . Sponge Bob.<br />

Back when I was a greenhorn <strong>in</strong> the family, I got a lot of<br />

“Oh, you’re a writer—I just love Ender’s Game. Orson Scott<br />

Card <strong>is</strong> my favorite,” or “The boys are read<strong>in</strong>g the Nephites <strong>in</strong><br />

Tenn<strong>is</strong> Shoes books right now, and I can’t get them to go to<br />

sleep at night,” or “Maybe you could read over th<strong>is</strong> piece I’m<br />

work<strong>in</strong>g on <strong>for</strong> the Ensign. It’s about my s<strong>is</strong>ter’s home teacher<br />

who blessed away her goiter.”<br />

Typically these encounters would trigger my head-nodd<strong>in</strong>g<br />

mechan<strong>is</strong>m and make me utter someth<strong>in</strong>g like: “Scott Card,<br />

yes. He lives <strong>in</strong> North Carol<strong>in</strong>a, I believe.”<br />

I have tried to read some of Card’s work, just to have someth<strong>in</strong>g<br />

to talk about at these th<strong>in</strong>gs, but I can’t br<strong>in</strong>g myself to<br />

get past the first page. Once I fool<strong>is</strong>hly said, “I taught Stan<strong>is</strong>law<br />

Lem’s Solar<strong>is</strong> th<strong>is</strong> fall <strong>in</strong> my Intro to Lit class.” At that po<strong>in</strong>t, the<br />

cous<strong>in</strong> I was talk<strong>in</strong>g to excused himself to get seconds. I don’t<br />

blame him. After all, I did say, “Stan<strong>is</strong>law,” which sounds a lot<br />

like “coleslaw.”<br />

PAGE 8 JULY 2004

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