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letters to the editors - Rochestermn.com

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Oc<strong>to</strong>ber, 2007 EXPOSED 7<br />

THE DATE DOCTOR<br />

By Ryan Bronkema<br />

Dear Date Dr.,<br />

I am in a bit of a predicament... I am 26 years old and<br />

just recently got dumped by my boyfriend. We dated<br />

ever since I moved <strong>to</strong> this area and I don’t know how I<br />

am ever going <strong>to</strong> meet a new guy. I decided <strong>to</strong> try my<br />

luck at eHarmony. After over a half hour of filling out<br />

<strong>the</strong> whole survey thing, <strong>the</strong>y <strong>to</strong>ld me “Sorry, we could<br />

not match you.” What! Help!<br />

– Don’t Want <strong>to</strong> Be<br />

Single Forever<br />

Hello,<br />

I have this roommate that I really like, and we seem <strong>to</strong><br />

have a lot in <strong>com</strong>mon – same career field, same taste<br />

in music, both like sports and working out. He is really<br />

easy <strong>to</strong> talk <strong>to</strong> and good-looking, but <strong>the</strong> problem he<br />

has a girlfriend and I am not sure if he would be interested<br />

in pursuing a guy. What should I do<br />

– Ruminating Roommate<br />

Dear Roommate,<br />

I would never encourage you <strong>to</strong> try <strong>to</strong> break up your roommate’s relationship.<br />

Breaking people up or attempting <strong>to</strong> is never a good idea, especially<br />

if you live with <strong>the</strong> person. The best thing you can do is continue <strong>to</strong> get <strong>to</strong><br />

know him and take it from <strong>the</strong>re. If he is ever going <strong>to</strong> consider anything<br />

with you, it will be based on <strong>the</strong> relationship that <strong>the</strong> two of you have built.<br />

Dear Single Forever,<br />

First off, take a deep breath…<br />

Second, log on<strong>to</strong> your eHarmony<br />

account and double check your<br />

information <strong>to</strong> make sure <strong>the</strong>re wasn’t<br />

some error that led you <strong>to</strong> your lack of harmony. If you go <strong>to</strong> <strong>the</strong> eHarmony<br />

help page, <strong>the</strong> site will walk you through how <strong>to</strong> contact Cus<strong>to</strong>mer Care or<br />

edit your “Match Page”. Give that a try.<br />

While it may be hard <strong>to</strong> believe, eHarmony is not going <strong>to</strong> find a match for<br />

everyone. Knowing that you just got out of a relationship, and that someone<br />

gave you a chance, I am sure <strong>the</strong>re are lots of o<strong>the</strong>r people out <strong>the</strong>re wanting<br />

<strong>to</strong> do <strong>the</strong> same.<br />

If you get <strong>to</strong> a point where he is single and you feel confident enough <strong>to</strong> approach<br />

him about this, you will need <strong>to</strong> take your conversation slow. It would<br />

help <strong>to</strong> start with letting him know that you are gay and see how he takes<br />

that. He may already know you’re gay, which would make this a bit easier. If<br />

he doesn’t know, ease in<strong>to</strong> it, you don’t want <strong>to</strong> freak out your roommate.<br />

The next step is <strong>to</strong> see if he has ever thought about dating men, and it might<br />

be best for you <strong>to</strong> just outright ask him that question. If he says no, you’ll at<br />

least know where he stands! Take it slow and get <strong>to</strong> know each o<strong>the</strong>r; your<br />

answers will be<strong>com</strong>e clear.<br />

Doc<br />

You should consider a singles program in Rochester, like Saavy Singles or<br />

Single in <strong>the</strong> City. Also, this issue of Exposed includes many o<strong>the</strong>r excellent<br />

entertainment options in <strong>the</strong> event calendar. They are great ways <strong>to</strong> get connected<br />

<strong>to</strong> what’s happening in <strong>the</strong> city!<br />

Keep your head up!<br />

Doc<br />

Need dating or relationship advice<br />

Ask <strong>the</strong> Date Doc!<br />

E-mail your question <strong>to</strong><br />

edi<strong>to</strong>r@rochesterexposed.<strong>com</strong>

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