Assam 2009 - Posoowa
Assam 2009 - Posoowa
Assam 2009 - Posoowa
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said nothing; she wanted to hear what<br />
he said. What did he think, the way she<br />
wanted to become a complete person<br />
before him She would permute the<br />
words he uttered. She wanted to be a<br />
poem to him, she longed to melt away<br />
in the depth of his eyes. At certain<br />
moments like this, life seemed to be<br />
reaching for greatness. That day they<br />
passed the moments in silence. Even in<br />
the midst of their endless conversations<br />
on several occasions after that, the<br />
words that hummed in their hearts did<br />
not come out. An unknown hesitation<br />
always left her speechless.<br />
After the BA results came out, the other<br />
three decided to pursue their studies<br />
outside <strong>Assam</strong>. Nira would pursue<br />
fashion design, Jishnu photography and<br />
Putala would study MA at Delhi<br />
University. She was left behind. She was<br />
the only daughter of her parents. Her<br />
elder brother was studying medicine.<br />
Her father was an elementary school<br />
teacher; thus, there were certain<br />
limitations to her dreams too. Before<br />
Putala left, the two of them had spent a<br />
lot of time together. She looked into<br />
his eyes, which wanted to say<br />
something. “Would you like to say<br />
something, Krishna” he had asked her.<br />
She shook her head. He took leave of<br />
her.<br />
She could never come out of her lower<br />
middle class circle. She had a<br />
tremendous inferiority complex due to<br />
her unhealthy, thin body. Because of a<br />
tall thin physique like hers, one of her<br />
aunts on her father’s side, was ageing<br />
without finding a match. She would try<br />
her best to keep her body covered.<br />
Even in the hot July weather she would<br />
wear blouses and salwar kameez with<br />
long sleeves and high neck. She would<br />
move from shop to shop looking for<br />
flat No 8/9 sandals. She would hesitate<br />
to move around among people with her<br />
6-foot tall body.<br />
She worked in the advertisement<br />
department of an English newspaper.<br />
She drew a salary with which she could<br />
manage reasonably well. She was alone,<br />
not having made any new friends like<br />
the others did. After five years they met<br />
again. They had changed. Nira’s long<br />
hair is short to ear length now. As a<br />
result of dieting, the roly-poly girl had<br />
slimmed down and turned into a piece<br />
11<br />
of wood. Her dresses were no longer<br />
modest. She had opened a boutique<br />
named Up-to-date. Jishnu too<br />
remained very busy in his studio. He<br />
had groomed many popular models.<br />
New faces thronged his studio every<br />
day. And Nira! She watched Nira’s<br />
activities in amazement. She cut into<br />
pieces and made new ones out of the<br />
colorful dresses her mother had woven<br />
in vivid variety, each of which was as<br />
beautiful as a picture. At her fashion<br />
shows the models wore clothes<br />
designed by her. If through one pair<br />
were revealed portions of the breasts,<br />
another pair gave prominence to the<br />
buttocks. How strangely they had<br />
changed! This Nira, whose hair had<br />
made poetry spring forth from Putala’s<br />
mouth! With an innocent open smile<br />
she would treat them to naamching,<br />
por apong and pork that she brought<br />
from her home. The way they would<br />
fight over those delicacies! So full of<br />
simplicity was Nira’s appearance! And,<br />
daubing that simplicity with a layer she<br />
turned into an artificial career woman.<br />
As she mused on the matter, she got a<br />
start upon hearing Putala’s voice: “Look<br />
Kis, you have a beautiful figure. You’ve<br />
got height. They want to make you<br />
glamorous. You can look at it in a<br />
positive way too.”<br />
Jishnu joined in: “Even I have been<br />
saying that. And, I shall first take a<br />
number of photographs of you in<br />
different poses.” The heart<br />
reverberating with words fell silent.<br />
Maybe this was how people had been<br />
making scarifices for ages for the sake<br />
of love. What was happening to her right<br />
now, that she was taking Putala’s advice<br />
to her heart! He too wanted her that<br />
way As a model Did he know that<br />
love never sought anything in return<br />
It only gives. Like a hilly river, like a fast<br />
flowing stream of water it simply flows<br />
on through the heart.<br />
“Do you agree Kis” Nira asked. She<br />
shook her head.<br />
Nira prepared many dresses for her in<br />
various designs. Placing the cosmetic<br />
box in front of her Nira put make-up<br />
on her. With lip liner she gave a different<br />
shape to her lips. Then there was dark<br />
eye shadow. Applying blue eyeliner on<br />
the eyes she turned her into a doll, a<br />
lifeless doll. Adjusting her top Jishnu<br />
slightly exposed her breasts. She<br />
shuddered. Sometimes her navel was<br />
revealed, sometimes her thighs. She<br />
closed her eyes. This was the modern<br />
age. This was not an age in which to<br />
remain ensconced like a snail inside a<br />
shell. She must be able to keep pace<br />
with them. Everything was changing; she<br />
too must be able to change. But, what<br />
was happening to her Why these<br />
teardrops<br />
This was not her world. She had kept<br />
this body of hers covered with longsleeved,<br />
high-necked dresses. Who<br />
were they to her that she should<br />
sacrifice everything for them Why<br />
were the people, who had once made<br />
her into what she is, now, turning her<br />
into a corpse She was Ratna teacher’s<br />
daughter; a simple human being who<br />
had tasted water from the pond and<br />
worked in the paddy field.... she was<br />
not a clay idol! Looking into Aditya’s<br />
eyes, she was surprised. This was not<br />
Aditya, with eyes that shone like those<br />
of a carnivorous ferocious beast. A pair<br />
of loveless dull eyes. These were not<br />
the eyes that she had been holding close<br />
to herself. There was no love in them,<br />
only burning desire, thirst. There was<br />
in them bestiality that could pounce on<br />
her and tear her to pieces in moments.<br />
A girl like her who loved the moonlight<br />
could never tolerate the greedy eyes of<br />
a lover. Let your eyes be the<br />
moonlight...spread out your hands in<br />
love...stress living life in love... that is a<br />
lover. That love had vanished from<br />
Aditya’s eyes. And for the first time she<br />
felt lonely with them. As if she was a<br />
helpless doe surrounded by hunters.<br />
Suddenly, to flee from four greedy eyes<br />
and the sight of a businesswoman! She<br />
picked up her long-sleeved churidar.<br />
The original story is Taai supermodel<br />
nohol – Translated by Biman<br />
Arandhara<br />
To advertise in<br />
<strong>Posoowa</strong>, contact<br />
JugalKalita@yahoo.com<br />
POSOOWA • June <strong>2009</strong>