Working on a Project - COBYS Family Services

Fostering Hope
FALL 2013 VOLUME 23, NUMBER 3
The Hess Family Is. . .
<strong>Working</strong> on a Project
Ask Greg Hess, 19, about recent
highlights in his life and he quickly
lists projects and hands on tasks.
Building a deluxe hutch with his dad
for his New Zealand white rabbit,
Bugsy. Helping to milk cows on a
relative’s farm.
“Greg is a really good worker,”
says COBYS Foster Care Caseworker
Landon Miller. “He wants to work
and he works hard.”
Since November 2011 Greg and
his adoptive parents Scott and Julie
Hess have been working hard on
another project—they have been
building trust, building a family, and
building a better future for a young
man who had a difficult past.
Abused and neglected by his
parents, Greg spent his teen years in
a variety of foster care and residential
settings. Two previous attempts
at finding a permanent home didn’t
Scott & Julie Hess
are providing son,
Greg, 19, with a
foundation that he
can build on as he
continues to grow and
make positive
changes. (Below) The
Hesses head off from
Lancaster County
Courthouse for a day
at Hersheypark after
Greg’s adoption on
July 11.
work out. Approaching 18, it
appeared increasingly unlikely that
Greg would find a permanent family.
Scott & Julie married in 2007,
when both were in their 40s. If they
were to have kids in the house, they
decided, it would be through foster
care or adoption.
After completing their COBYS
resource parent training in 2010 and
providing short-term respite care for
a few foster children, Scott & Julie
met Greg in fall 2011. They traveled
to the residential facility in Western
Pennsylvania, where Greg lived, for
an initial one-day meeting, then
spent a weekend in Erie area, before
hosting Greg for a visit during a
memorable October snowstorm that
knocked power out in their
Centerville home and across much of
the northeast. “That was the funnest
day ever!” Greg enthuses.
On November 21 Greg moved in
and never left.
A lot has happened since then,
and Greg has grown in more ways
than one. The obvious growth is in
stature. “When he first came,” says
Julie, who works as a second shift
Nursing Supervisor at the Mennonite
Home in Lancaster, “he was almost
‘failure to thrive.’ He was on the
supplemental drinks” to gain weight.
After a couple weeks with the
Hesses he began to eat. . . and eat. . .
and eat. (Hot dogs and pizza are
foods of choice, but he does well
even with brussels sprouts.) And as a
result he began to grow, shooting up
six inches in 18 months and packing
more than a few pounds onto his
lean frame. “We add Miracle-Gro® to
his food,” Julie says facetiously.
Perhaps even more important
than his physical growth, has been
some emotional growth. Asked how
things have changed in his life in the
(continued on page three)

Mission Statement
Motivated by Christian faith,
COBYS Family Services educates,
supports, and empowers children
and adults to reach their full
potential.
Board of Directors
Rose Walmer, President
Tom Weber, Vice-President
Debra Krantz, Secretary
John Wise, Treasurer
Pamela Ament Nancy Fittery
Steve Echternach Arthur Kreider
Wendy Egolf Brenda Spence
Administrative Staff
Mark Cunningham, Executive Director
Mary Sourber, Director of Placement
Services
Donald Fitzkee, Director of
Development
Cynthia Umberger, Controller
Bethany Kauffman-Raub, Office Manager
Michele Romeo Martin, Supervisor of
Counseling Services
Abby Keiser, Family Life Education
Supervisor
Sharon Kingsley, Foster Care Supervisor
Nicole Lauzus, Permanency Unit
Supervisor
Fostering Hope is the quarterly
newsletter of COBYS Family Services, a
Christian family service agency, affiliated
with the Atlantic Northeast District of the
Church of the Brethren.
COBYS Family Services
1417 Oregon Road
Leola, PA 17540
Phone: 717-656-6580
800-452-6517
Fax: 717-656-3056
www.cobys.org
What a Difference a Year Makes!
As I was reviewing events that have occurred in the life of COBYS over
the past year or so, July 25, 2012, stood out to me. That was the day
that I first set foot in a vacant building at 171 East King Street,
Lancaster—a building that later would become our Family Life Center.
We purchased the building on October 1, 2012, did numerous
upgrades, moved Family Life Education staff in on December 8, and
began hosting programs there on January 8 of this year.
Since then, COBYS has held 18 classes (about 130 total class
sessions) and served more than 300 adults and children at our Family
Life Center. (And that doesn’t count the 17 classes and workshops that
our educators led in churches, schools, Lancaster County Prison, and
other locations in our communities during that time.) Currently
programs are running four nights a week and some Saturday mornings
at 171 East King. A lot of ministry is happening at our new facility!
I am so thankful for all the ways the programs
there are helping to strengthen families. When I
reflect on all that has happened over the past
year, I can’t help but to be thankful and
recognize that God has been with us throughout
this entire process! We are blessed!
Because of the support we receive from so
many faithful donors, we were in a position to
make a down payment on the property and pay
for minor renovations and furnishings. But
there’s still work to be done.
As you can read on page seven in this
newsletter, we now have launched the “Work for the Well-Being of the
City” campaign. We will be inviting individuals, businesses, and
churches to go above and beyond their regular support over the next
couple years to help us eliminate the debt we have on the new
property, recoup some of the start-up costs, and provide even more
classes for parents and children in the new facility and beyond its doors.
It will take $300,000 to accomplish these goals.
COBYS doesn’t have financial campaigns often. This is just the third
in 33 years. We are thankful for the strong support we receive for our
ministries all of the time, and we schedule campaigns only when we
have a special need. As campaigns go, $300,000 is a pretty modest
figure, but it still will take some substantial gifts to accomplish the
campaign’s goals and solidify our Family Life Education ministries.
We’re doing a lot of good things at our Family Life Center! When we
ask you to give in coming months, we hope you will say “yes” to
partnering with us as we “Work for the Well-Being of the City”!
Mark Cunningham, Executive Director
Fostering Hope 2

(continued from page one)
past 18 months, Greg understates,
“We trust each other a little more.”
Learning to trust is no small feat.
“The Hesses have had to tear
out the foundation and build a
whole new foundation,” explains
COBYS Adoption Caseworker
Melanie Swansfeger, since Greg
doesn’t have a positive understanding
of what a mother and father are.
“Deep down he can’t fully trust,”
says Landon. “He has reasons not to
trust anyone in that role, but he’s
come a long way in trusting a
family.”
His parents see other positive
developments.
“One of the biggest changes I
see in Greg,” says his dad, “is he has
become more confident in himself.
He’s a little more outgoing than he
was.”
“He does well with people,” Julie
agrees.
“Especially little ones,” Greg
adds. “They like me.”
Greg has had some other
accomplishments this summer, as
well. In June, he walked with the
graduating class at Hempfield High
School and has been accepted into a
highly competitive Lancaster-
Lebanon Intermediate Unit 13
Willow Valley Work Immersion
Program.
“There’s a lot that apply and
only so many get in,” says Landon.
“He can be learning some trades
there and likely get a job there after
his training. So that’s really
exciting.”
The one-year program, based at
the Willow Valley retirement
community, teaches work and life
skills to high-school seniors.
Program participants complete
several one- to two-month internships
at the retirement community
Greg not
only is fond
of his rabbit,
Bugsy, but
also is quick to
put up the
bunny ears
when a camera
comes out. He
gave caseworker
Landon Miller
some ears at
graduation in June (above) and
Landon returned the favor at Greg’s
July adoption.
or local businesses.
If things go well, Greg will
officially graduate from high school
next June and will be in a good
position to obtain employment.
Greg already has been building
his resume. He worked for PA Scales
as part of an IU 13 internship, and
continues to work part-time as a
host at Dutch Apple Dinner Theatre.
Greg also enjoys working around
home; assisting his dad with
projects at Manor Church near
Mountville, where Scott is
employed as Facilities Manager and
where the whole family worships;
and generally helping out where
needed. At COBYS resource parent
training events hosted by area
churches, Greg will be the guy
tearing town tables and putting
away chairs after the meal.
When I arrived to meet the
Hesses at their home on an August
day, Greg was assisting a contractor
to finish up a window replacement
project. (I got the idea that he
would rather have stuck with that
project than talk with me!) The
previous couple days he had helped
tear out the old windows. “He
enjoys demolition way too much,”
his dad says with a grin.
But the Hesses’ biggest project
still is working on building
that family. They took a
major step on July 11,
when Scott and Julie
adopted Greg, followed
by a celebratory trip to
Hersheypark.
Despite challenges
along the way, the
Hesses have no
regrets. “I’m glad that
we’re doing what we’re
doing,” says Julie.
“He stretched me in some ways
I wasn’t expecting,” Scott adds,
“but it’s all good. Some of the
stretching is trying to understand
where Greg is coming from.”
Both Scott and Julie have felt
supported by Landon and Melanie
along the way, and Melanie continues
to provide post permanency
services to help the family adjust
and continue to grow.
While Greg has become more
independent and looks forward to
the day when he can do even more
things on his own, he recognizes
that he still has some work to do to
overcome the effects of his
childhood.
Fortunately, he has some good
people in his corner who are willing
to lend him a hand.
“I’m a fix-it type person,” says
Scott, “but this I can’t fix. I can help
him work through it, but I can’t fix
it.”
But Greg’s a hard worker, and
with some help, he just might get it
done. He now has the foundation
of a supportive family to build on.
Fostering Hope 3

Ministry by the Numbers
2012/13 Statistical Report
Motivated by Christian faith, COBYS
Family Services educates, supports,
and empowers children and adults to
reach their full potential. During the
past year (July 1, 2012– June 30, 2013),
59 staff (28 full-time) helped to carry
out this mission in these ways:
Adoption. Adoption staff
finalized 28 adoptions of foster
children and provided additional
services to 163 foster children and 28
foster/adoptive resource families.
Thirty-one families received support
services after their adoption.
An affiliate of the Statewide
Adoption & Permanency Network
(SWAN), the COBYS adoption program
offers six services: family profiles, child
profiles, child preparation services,
child specific recruitment (for harder
to place children), legal finalization,
and post permanency services for
adoptive families.
In addition to these SWAN-related
services, COBYS provided free birth
parent counseling to seven families
facing unplanned pregnancies and
worked with eight families who were
seeking to adopt an infant. One infant
adoption was finalized. COBYS birth
parent counselors are available as a
resource to pastors, churches, and
others as they assist families facing
unplanned pregnancies.
Counseling. COBYS therapists
provided some 2,500 hours of therapy
during the year, an increase of about
200 hours from the previous year.
COBYS offers individual, family, and
marital counseling on a sliding scale
basis for uninsured clients and also
accepts payment from some major
health insurers.
Therapists address relational
issues with couples and families;
depression, anxiety, and other mood
disorders; ADHD; and more.
Counseling centers are located at the
COBYS main office, north of Lancaster;
Mechanic Grove Church of the
Brethren, Quarryville; and First United
Methodist Church in Palmyra.
Family Life Education. The
move of the Family Life Education
program to a new facility in Lancaster
in December was a 2012/13 highlight
(see pages 2 & 7). During the year
COBYS educators led 47 courses and 16
workshops, providing 634 classroom
hours and serving 1,085 adults, youth,
and children. Programs were offered
at 31 different sites, including the new
Family Life Center, community
locations, schools, churches, and
Lancaster County Prison.
Foster Care. Foster care staff
facilitated 19,953 days of care for 101
foster children, many of whom were
placed with their brothers and sisters.
Fostering Hope 4

Eleven new sibling groups came into
care and COBYS families cared for a
total of 28 sibling groups, including 18
groups of two children, seven groups
of three, and three groups of four! We
also provided care to seven children
with special medical needs, such as
brain trauma, prenatal drug addiction,
and congenital defects.
During the year, 20 foster children
were reunited with their birth parents
or relatives and 21 were adopted by
their COBYS foster family. Among
those adopted were six sibling groups.
We approved 11 new foster/adoptive
resource families, bringing our total
number of families at year-end to 64.
COBYS offers monthly informational
sessions at the COBYS main office and
at the Wyomissing Church of the
Brethren for families interested in
exploring foster care or adoption.
Permanency. The Permanency
Unit provided services for 70 children
from 45 families. Five of those children
took steps toward adoption, while 17
were able to return home to their
parents. Two others were placed with
Private Giving Comparison
a Permanent Legal Custodian, and two
more reached age 18 and signed out of
foster care to live independently.
The goal of this specialized
program—which is based in Lancaster
and operated in partnership with the
Lancaster County Children & Youth
Social Service Agency—is to find a
permanent home for foster children as
quickly and safely as possible. Staff
monitor the well-being of foster
children, support foster parents, and
assist birth parents to overcome the
issues that led to their children’s
placement in care.
Year ANE Churches Other General Total General Bequests
2012/13 $81,685.04 $460,688.24 $542,373.28 $33,196.96
2011/12 $91,120.41 $442,446.37 $533,566.78 $9,375.00
2010/11 $94,608.62 $412,110.84 $506,719.46
2009/10 $93,651.16 $399,492.80 $493,143.96 $8,179.37
2008/09 $107,590.67 $489,569.90 $597,160.57
Community Connections. In
this program’s second year, COBYS
partnered with four churches to help
them meet the emotional and material
needs of people in their congregations
and communities. COBYS provides case
management services to assist local
churches as they serve dependent
families. Caseworkers help clients set
goals and utilize community services,
so churches can stay focused on
spiritual needs and friendship. As their
support network widens, families’
financial dependence on the church
lessens. Community Connections
provided services to eight families.
Financial Support
COBYS Family Services’ annual
budget of $2.9 million is supported by
public funding, grants, fees for services,
and private donations. This report
focuses on private giving, which
accounts for one fifth of COBYS’
income. For the third consecutive year
private giving grew, but still has not
reached pre-recession levels. A strong
year in bequests further strengthened
our financial position.
A long-term downward trend in
giving from Brethren congregations
through the Atlantic Northeast District
(ANE) was even more pronounced this
year, although some of that can be
attributed to congregations sending
support in a variety of other ways.
Taking into account all giving from ANE
congregations (such as special
outreach, Bible school offerings, in
kind donations, etc.) total giving from
churches actually increased slightly.
We are grateful for the strong
financial support that enables us to
continue to serve children and families
in Christ’s name!
A version of this report that
includes a list of donors is available on
the News & Events page at
www.cobys.org. Audited financial
statements are available upon request.
Fostering Hope 5

Record Grant to Fund Innovative Education Programs
When a class is filled within 24 hours
of announcing its availability, that’s a
pretty good indication that a need
exists. That’s what happened with the
first COBYS Incredible Years Dina
Dinosaur Child Training Program that
got underway on August 19.
And thanks to a grant of $193,986
from the Pennsylvania Commission on
Crime & Delinquency (PCCD)—thought
to be the largest grant COBYS Family
Services has received in its 33 years of
history—COBYS will be meeting needs
of children and their parents through
this program for the next two years.
“I think it’s exciting to see more
and more families have their needs
met,” says COBYS Family Life Education
Supervisor Abby Keiser. “It’s exciting to
be able to feed, nurture, and watch
them grow, and to help stabilize their
families.”
Executive Director Mark
Cunningham credits Abby with being
very proactive in seeking grant funding
and for her persistence in ensuring
delivery of the money when the state
budget process placed the funding in
peril after the award was announced.
The grant application, which was a
collaborative effort between COBYS
Family Life Education and Counseling
programs, sought funding to bring two
new programs to Lancaster County.
The Incredible Years Dina Dinosaur
Child Training Program serves children,
ages 4-8, who are difficult to manage,
aggressive, or may have disruptive
behaviors. At-risk children with mental
health problems are ideal participants.
An Incredible Years parenting
program is offered concurrently with
the kids program. Both programs meet
weekly for two hours for 18 weeks.
The current program, which is serving
eight children and nine parents (and
providing childcare for eight siblings),
will continue on Monday evenings
until Christmas. The January children’s
Landon Miller and Karen Herr, with
the help of puppets Wally and Dina
Dinosaur, are leading the inaugural
COBYS Dina Child Training Program,
which is funded by a nearly $200,000
grant from the Pennsylvania
Commission on Crime & Delinquency. As
children help puppets Wally and Molly
(not pictured) solve their problems, they
also gain insight into themselves.
program already is filled, as well. The
evening begins with a family meal at
5:30, with education from 6:00 to 8:00
p.m. Lisa Stoltzfus is Program Coordinator.
In Good Company
The PCCD grant will fund four
children’s programs and four parent
programs at the COBYS Family Life
Center in Lancaster, and an additional
eight children’s programs at Lancaster
County Head Start locations. COBYS
Supervisor of Counseling Services Dr.
Michele Romeo Martin serves as
Mental Health Consultant for Head
Start and was instrumental in
establishing the link between COBYS
and Head Start, says Abby.
The evidence-based Incredible
Years Dina Program has been proven
effective in reducing aggressive and
disruptive behaviors, improving social
skills, and helping children to solve
problems and understand and control
emotions. It includes therapeutic and
educational elements, and utilizes
puppet and video modeling, coaching
and reinforcement with structured
activities, visual imagery, fantasy play,
and live role plays.
And what does all this have to do
with dinosaurs, you may ask? The
children’s portion of the program is
named after a puppet—Dina
Dinosaur—who serves as “principal” of
the “school” that participating children
are enrolled in.
If you work in the corporate world and decide to support COBYS through United
Way or by enlisting a matching gift from your employer, you are in good company.
COBYS has many donors who support our ministries through the workplace.
While COBYS does not receive funding through United Way’s regular fund
drive, individuals can designate their United Way contributions to benefit COBYS
through the Donor Choice program. To participate, simply fill out the form that is
available from your employer and specify COBYS Family Services as the agency you
would like to support. That way you can participate in a United Way campaign,
while also knowing your gifts are helping a ministry that you care about.
Whether or not you participate in United Way, you may want to check if your
employer matches employee donations. Many do. You may be able to double
your donation to COBYS—and double the ministry we are able to accomplish.
Fostering Hope 6

‘Work for the Well-Being’
Financial Campaign Underway
COBYS Family Services has launched a
two-year, $300,000 financial campaign
to pay for a new facility in Lancaster
and undergird Family Life Education
programming. Based on Jeremiah 29:7,
the campaign theme is “Work for the
Well-Being of the City.”
Last October COBYS purchased a
5,400-square-foot facility at 171 East
King Street, Lancaster, to house Family
Life Education staff and programs.
Staff relocated in December and the
first programs began in January. The
move was prompted by a need for
consistent, well-equipped facilities for
education and childcare and a growing
realization that many COBYS Family
Life Education clients live in the city.
In concert with the education
theme, the campaign goals can be
summarized in three R’s: Retire
ExtraOrdinary Give Back for Round Two
The first ever 24-hour online giving
campaign sponsored last fall by the
Lancaster County Community
Foundation was so successful that they
are doing it again. And COBYS is all in.
This year’s ExtraOrdinary Give is
slated for Friday, November 22. More
than 200 non-profit organizations are
expected to participate. The logistics
are the same as last year. With credit
card in hand,
donors simply
need to visit
extragive.org
between 12:00
a.m. and 11:59
p.m. on Friday,
November 22,
choose COBYS
from the list of organizations, and give
a donation of $25 or more.
The Foundation, with help from
Presenting Sponsor Rodgers & Associates,
is promoting the event, providing
prize money, and offering a $250,000
“stretch fund” that will be divided
proportionately among participating
organizations. The more our donors
give, the greater COBYS’ portion of the
$250,000.
On top of the match, an additional
$50,000 will be awarded in prizes.
During certain time periods, individual
donations will be randomly selected. If
a COBYS donor is chosen, the foundation
will add $1,000 to that donation.
The more individual donations COBYS
receives, the greater the chance of
winning one or more prizes.
Last year COBYS had the fifth
highest donation amount out of 192
organizations and earned a $1,000
Early Bird prize for being the second
organization to reach 50 unique donors.
COBYS’ net income for the day
exceeded $32,500.
“Now that people know how this
works,” says COBYS Director of
Development Don Fitzkee, “we think
the competition will be tougher. If
we’re going to win the Early Bird prize
this year, it probably will take some
night owls to give at the stroke of
midnight.”
Please mark your calendar, tell your
friends, and remember COBYS on
November 22. If you don’t have access
to a computer or have questions,
contact Don at 717-656-6580 or
don@cobys.org.
remaining debt on the Family Life
Center; Recoup a portion of costs for
furnishing the building; and Raise new
funds to support Family Life Education
programs.
“We recognize that $300,000 is a
modest figure for a campaign,”
acknowledges Director of Development
Don Fitzkee. “We considered a
larger figure but ultimately decided
that this is what we need.” Any giving
above the goal will support additional
Family Life Education programming.
All members of the COBYS Board
of Directors made commitments to
the campaign this summer.
The Lead Gifts portion of the
campaign is being conducted during
the fall months, followed by a general
invitation later in the fall. Individuals
are being asked to consider two-year
commitments for 2013/14 or 2014/15.
The church phase of the campaign
will begin with visits in spring 2014.
Churches will be invited to support in
2015 and 2016, with a suggested
giving amount of $10.00 per attender
per year for the two years.
Goals at a Glance
Retire Family Life Center Debt $185,000
Recoup Startup Costs $45,000
Raise Funds for Education $70,000
Total $300,000
The campaign is being conducted
entirely by COBYS board members
and staff. Board President Rose
Walmer is Chair of the campaign.
Serving on the Lead Gifts Team are
Steve Echternach, Brenda Spence, and
John Wise. Church Gift Team
members are Wendy Egolf, Nancy
Fittery, and Debra Krantz. Staff are
Executive Director Mark Cunningham,
Family Life Education Supervisor Abby
Keiser, and Fitzkee.
Fostering Hope 7

COBYS Family Services
1417 Oregon Road
Leola, PA 17540
Address Service Requested
Non-Profit
U.S. Postage
PAID
Permit No. 52
Lancaster, PA
Become our fan on Facebook.
Bike & Hike Sponsors
Event
Thanks!
Major
Carl & Margaret Wenger
Sponsors
Seeking Help for a Historic Day: Last Call for Bike & Hike
Your help is needed to reach a major
milestone at the 17th annual COBYS Bike
& Hike, which will take place on Sunday,
September 8, beginning at the Lititz
Church of the Brethren. Events begin at
1:30 p.m.
“We’ve been steadily climbing
toward the $100,000 mark,” says event
planner Don Fitzkee. “We think this is
the year, and we’re asking people to pull
together to get us over the top.” Last
year, the Bike & Hike set a new income
record of nearly $95,000. More than 500
people participated.
COBYS’ signature event, the Bike &
Hike includes a three-mile walk through
Lititz, 10- and 25-mile bicycle rides on
rural roads around Lititz, and the 65-
mile Dutch Country Motorcycle Ride.
This year’s motorcycle ride includes
scenic roads near Speedwell Forge, Mt.
Gretna, and Colebrook, with a break in
Elizabethtown and more sights in the
western part of Lancaster County.
Participants choose their event and
either pay a minimum registration fee or
obtain sponsors. Pre-registration is not
required. Just come!
Those unable to walk or ride that
day can support the event by sponsoring
someone else or sending a donation in
the envelope included with this newsletter.
(Write “Bike & Hike” in the memo
line of your check.)
Businesses already have kicked in
more than $22,000—a new record. (See
sponsors above.)
Each participant receives a free t-
shirt (while supplies last), ice cream and
refreshments, and an opportunity to win
one of dozens of door prizes. Those who
raise certain levels of support can earn
additional prizes.
In addition,
grand prizes
donated by
area businesses
will be awarded
to the top three
fundraisers.
Prizes include
two Cracker Barrel rocking chairs, a
$100 gift certificate for travel with Bob
Neff Tours, a trip for two to New York
City from Conestoga Tours, and two
swivel patio chairs from Good’s Store.
Top fundraisers may choose one of
these prizes or substitute any other
prize from the prize table.
More information, including the
brochure and routes, is available at
www.cobys.news/htm. Or contact Don
at 717-656-6580 or don@cobys.org.