Bar/Bat Mitzvah Handbook - Temple Sinai

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RELIGIOUS APPARELA Bar Mitzvah must wear a kippah and tallit. A BatMitzvah must wear a head covering. If a Ba6t Mitzvahwishes to wear a tallit, she may do so. However, thisdecision should not be taken lightly, as the wearing oftallit is a lifelong obligation.At Temple Sinai, all men wear head coverings. Allwomen who go to the bimah must wear head coveringsand should leave their handbags at their seats. We willgladly provide head coverings for those men and womenwho do not bring their own.At Temple Sinai, the tallit is worn at a morning service,but not at a Mincha (evening) service. However, at allservices, any man coming to the bimah for a Torahhonor must wear a tallit. At a service where tefillin areworn (Sunday or weekday) the Bar Mitzvah - and BatMitzvah if she has chosen this obligation - must weartefillin. Fathers and male siblings are also expected towear tefillin; other men receiving Torah honors areencouraged to wear tefillin.The Bar/Bat Mitzvah and family should dress in amanner which reflects the religious nature of thisceremony; short skirts, low-cut necklines, off-theshoulderand/or sleeveless dresses areinappropriate synagogue attire.It is important to remind women guests, especially thosewho will come to the bimah for an honor, that shortskirts, low-cut necklines, off-the-shoulder and/orsleeveless dresses are inappropriate synagogueattire.Religious apparel, including tallitot, tefillin, tallit andtefillin bags, head coverings for women and kippot(personalized), are available for purchase at TempleSinai’s Sisterhood Gift Shop, 215-643-7372.PARTICIPATION IN SERVICES1. Friday Nighta. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah and his or her parents willascend the bimah and read an English prayerbefore the congregation blesses the Shabbatcandles.b. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah will recite Kiddush.2. Shabbat Morning/Shabbat Mincha/Sunday orWeekdaya. The parents of the Bar Mitzvah - and of the BatMitzvah if she has chosen to wear a tallit - willpresent the tallit prior to the beginning of theservice.b. At the Bar/Bat Mitzvah service, the parents willbe honored with an Aliyah.c. As part of the service, the Bar/Bat Mitzvah willaddress the congregation. The parents of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah usually recite a prayer aloud in front ofthe ark. A meeting with the Rabbi to discuss theparents’ and child’s remarks will occurapproximately nine months prior to the Bar/BatMitzvah. Original prayers are encouraged, butplease remember that these are prayers to G-d infront of the Ark and the congregation.d. Siblings or other relatives of the Bar/Bat Mitzvahare welcome to call him/her to the Torah. Arecording may be obtained for young children. Ifyou prefer, the Cantor will call your child to theTorah.e. After the Rabbi’s charge, the parents and theimmediate family will be asked to stand and recitethe Shehecheyanu with the Rabbi.f. At the conclusion of a Shabbat morning service,the Bar/Bat Mitzvah and his/her immediate familywill exit the sanctuary first and stand alongside theRabbi and Cantor at the kiddush table in theauditorium.g. During most Shabbat morning services, adultsupervised babysitting is available. We encourageyou to make your guests aware of this service.h. The parents and the Bar/Bat Mitzvah will beasked to come to the synagogue and serve as“greeters” at the Bar/Bat Mitzvah service whichproceeds their simcha. Families celebrating onShabbat morning or on a Sunday/Weekdaymorning would greet at a Shabbat morning service.Families celebrating at a Shabbat Mincha servicewould greet at a Shabbat Mincha service.6
Bar/Bat MITZVAH CALENDARCHANGESThe assignment of B’nai Mitzvah dates occursapproximately three years in advance of the synagogueceremony. During the intervening period of time, it maybecome necessary for the synagogue to create a doubleBar/Bat Mitzvah on a Saturday morning that wasoriginally scheduled to be a single. The synagoguereserves the right to make such a change up until thepoint at which a student begins his or her Bar/Bat Mitzvahlessons.Bar/Bat MITZVAH CELEBRATIONThe Bar/Bat Mitzvah celebration should focus on thereligious significance of the occasion. This is a time thatshould be marked by the gathering of family and friends.It is Temple Sinai’s philosophy that ostentatious partiesdeny the sanctity of the occasion and take away from thereligious significance of the event.In planning your celebration, we strongly urge you to keepin mind the pronouncement of the Conservative Rabbis ofour community regarding the manner of celebratingreligious occasions. They state that: “Two of the mosthallowed Jewish institutions which we deemindispensable for the survival of Judaism are Shabbatand kashrut (Jewish dietary laws). To violate either orboth of these sacred traditions in conjunction with thecelebration of a religious event, such as a wedding or Baror Bat Mitzvah, is to compromise seriously thesignificance of the occasion and to render a disservice tothe tradition which provides the motivation and theframework for that occasion. Accordingly, we call uponour people to enhance the spiritual character of thesacred moments in their lives by observing them in wayswhich honor the Shabbat and kashrut.”In order to enhance the celebration of a Bar/Bat Mitzvahin the Synagogue, the following policy has been approvedby the Board of Directors: “In accordance with an opinionwithin the Rabbinical Assembly’s Committee on Law andStandards, the Temple Sinai Religious Committeeapproves live background and Israeli folk music at asocial function celebrating a religious simcha held in thesynagogue on Shabbat. The type of music will bespecifically regulated, and only Israeli dancing will beallowed.”The use of cell phones, pagers and other electronicdevices is prohibited on Shabbat. Please makecertain that you and your guests turn off such devicesbefore entering the synagogue.Smoking is prohibited within the building as well as onthe grounds of Temple Sinai. Please ask your guests toabide by our policy. Chewing gum is also not permittedin the sanctuary.Please encourage your guests to remain in thesanctuary for the duration of the service. Constantentering and exiting during the service detracts from thesanctity of the occasion.It is expected that visitors and guests act appropriatelyat all times and treat our facility with respect.The Synagogue does permit professional videotapingand still photography of Shabbat luncheons undercertain conditions; flash photography and videolights are not permitted on Shabbat. No photography isallowed in the sanctuary. In all cases, only thoseprofessionals engaged by the family are permitted tophotograph or videotape. If you are makingarrangements to videotape the service and/or yourluncheon, you must contact the synagogue office.BAR/BAT MITZVAH FEESThe Bar/Bat Mitzvah family pays a fee to cover the costsof all instruction, including materials. The fee also helpsto defray the cost of the Oneg Shabbat. The use of thesynagogue immediately following services for theKiddush is also included.The synagogue enlists the services of security guards forall Bar/Bat Mitzvah evening parties and occasionally forother related events as well depending on the type ofevent and number of attendees.This security service is arranged by the synagogueoffice and is billed to the B/M family. The fee for thisservice must be paid to the synagogue one month prior tothe affair.The Bar/Bat Mitzvah fee and all other outstandingfinancial obligations to the Synagogue must be paid in fullno later than six weeks prior to the Bar/Bat Mitzvah.7
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Bar/Bat Mitzvah Handbook - Temple Sinai

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