Download - Baker's Acres Greenhouse

MISSION STATEMENTIt is our greatest desire to provide our customers with top quality, well-grown plantmaterial at a fair and honest price. We will strive to provide an unmatched selectionof old favorites and underused, hard-to-find items, along with the newest varietieson the market. We will eagerly share our horticultural knowledge gained fromyears of education and experience. Lastly, we offer all this in a spirit of fun andlightheartedness.SPANISH MISSION STATEMENTEs nuestro mayor deseo el ofrecerle a nuestros clientes una calidad de primera ennuestras plantas a un precio justo y honesto. Nuestra compania hace todo lo possiblepara proveer a nuestra clientera con una seleccion incomparable de variedadesfavoritas y no comunes, junto a nuevas variedades en el mercado. Gratamentecompartiremos nuestros conocimientos en horticultura obtenidos por una educaciony experiencia con nuestra clientera. Y finalmente ofresemos todo esto en un espiritude alegria y felicidad.TRANSMISSION STATEMENTThe transmission is one of those black, greasy items you would see if you crawledunder your car and looked up. It’s kind of important when you want your car to moveforward or backward but has nothing to do with any sideways or vertical motion.Experience of the latter two motions should be cause for concern.EMISSION STATEMENTThis past year’s elections resulted in copious amounts of gaseous emissions but it wasnowhere near the output from our big yellow dog. Please, someone help us!SUBMISSION STATEMENTOur radio ads, our email newsletter, this catalog, and even our greenhouse music areall filled with subliminal messages designed to force you to submit to our will. Youwill buy plants until your car is full. You will tell all your friends about us. You willthink we look like movie stars. Just kidding! We really don’t do that……..or do we?APPARITION STATEMENTApparition is a fancy word for ghost. That reminds me of the couple who had a ‘SixthSense’ open marriage. They were both free to see dead people.INTERMISSION STATEMENTThis intermission may be used at any time during the reading of this catalog. Feel freeto use the restroom facilities or visit the snack bar for refreshments. When the houselights are dimmed, please return to your seat in a timely manner and resume reading.Thank you, The Management.TITIAN STATEMENTAs any good student of art will tell you, Titian was a famous and influential painterfrom the Italian Renaissance period known for his brilliant use of color. He was amember of the 16th-century Venetian School, often donating his paintings for thePTO fundraising raffles.RE-MISSION STATEMENTThe act of certain people redefining ‘Mission Statement’ over and over, ad nauseum.OMISSION STATEMENTDue to space limitations again, this year’s Omission Statement has been omitted.