NEXUS ISSUE 17 2014

N.17 / V.46

nexus magazine 

EDITOR 

RACHAEL ELLIOTT 

EDITOR@NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ 

DESIGN 

HAYLIE GRAY 

MANAGING EDITOR 

JAMES RAFFAN 

CONTRIBUTORS 

SPORTS GUY 

DR RICHARD SWAINSON 

HP 

BEATS BY J 

PETER DORNAUF 

AUNTY SLUT 

ZAC LYON 

MELISA MARTIN 

ALIX HIGBY 

JESSICA WILSON 

AMBER CARDALE 

RYAN WOOD 

KARL GUETHERT 

LOUISE HUTT 

SWEET PAINTED LADY 

LAUREN BARNARD 

LAURENCE MCLEAN 

AARON LETCHER 

DARCIE 

TEE SHIP 

MATT HICKS 

SARA LEMME 

GABRIEL BANKIER-PERRY 

PHOTOGRAPHY 

ASHLEIGH MATTHEWS 

BECKI MOSS 

PHILLIP WONG 

ADVERTISING 

ADS@NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ 

OFFICES 

GROUND FLOOR 

STUDENT UNION BUILDING 

GATE ONE, UNIVERSITY OF WAIKATO 

KNIGHTON ROAD, HAMILTON 

ONLINE 

NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ 

FACEBOOK.COM/NEXUSNZ 

@NEXUSMAG 

SPOTIFY: NEXUSMAGAZINE 

CONTENTS 

— 

_03 Editorial 

_04 Lettuce to the Editor 

_05 News 

_08 News from the University 

_09 Sport 

_10 Ridiculist & Vox Pops 

_11 Reviews 

_14 Honest Matt 

_15 Horoscopes & Playlist 

_16 Auteur 

_17 Arts and Stuff 

_18 What is this Election about? 

_19 Candidate Bios 

_28 Columns 

_39 Advice 

_40 Notices 

_41 Recipe 

_42 Puzzles 

2 nexusmag.co.nz


PHOTOGRAPH: ASHLEIGH MATTHEWS 

EDITORIAL 

RACHAEL ELLIOTT 

— 

I’ve come to the conclusion this week that I’m an artist. I admit it. 

I’m probably never going to be a rich career woman, and when I 

think about it, that was never really on my agenda. I just want to 

be happy. And you know what makes me happy? Writing. Riding my 

horse. Dancing in my underwear. Eating chocolate. Teaching people 

stuff. And while money is required to do some of these things, a big 

pile of it really isn’t necessary. It would be nice (oh god, would it be 

nice) but it’s not necessary. So I guess that’s why I’m feeling okay 

about my current non-plan. 

A couple of weeks ago my Dad’s side of the family had a gettogether. 

All the cousins were there with their insta-families, smugly 

staring at my childlessness, my aunties and uncles were there in 

their flash cars, and my grandparents were there, picking out new 

linoleum for their kitchen. Again. Someone asked the dreaded question 

about what the point to all this university stuff is. A.k.a- why am 

I wasting my time at university when I could be jet setting, earning 

truckloads or popping out babies. I patiently explained… again… and 

was blown out of the water when my Dad turned to me and said, “So 

what you’re saying is, you’re actually really successful, you’re just not 

making much money?” 

Mind. Blown. Exactly this. Sometimes success doesn’t mean piles 

of cash. Sometimes success cannot be measured in dollars and 

cents. Sometimes, in my opinion anyway, success means a hell of a 

lot more than having a fat bank account. 

I’m living the dream right now. My job is writing. My other job is 

teaching. I have time in my life to ride my horse and dance and plan 

ridiculous creative adventures. I’m surrounded by creative people 

being creative. And yes, I’d like a new horse float. And yes, I’d like 

some rad new jeans. And yes, I’d like to have a holiday in Japan, or 

Canada, or Scotland or Brisbane. But do I need those things to be 

happy? 

I’m honestly not sure. 

But what I do know for certain is that without writing, without 

teaching, without riding my horse and without dancing- I am absolutely 

miserable. I’ve found people who will pay me small amounts 

of money to do these things, and I’m breaking even. Now I just need 

to find someone who wants to pay me heaps of money to do those 

things, and we’re onto a winner. 

3


LETTUCE 

DISCLAIMER: 

Letters published contain the opinion of 

the writer and the writer alone. Nexus 

publications take no responsibility for the 

content or opinions so expressed. By submitting 

your letter you give consent to its 

publication in Nexus and subsequent public 

scrutiny. Letters are the authors own 

work and Nexus will not edit to compensate 

for lack of intelligence or coherency. 

Nexus reserves the right to edit or refuse 

to publish any letter which breaches any 

law, is defamatory to any person, or contains 

threats of violence or hate speech. 

Holding out for 

a Hero 

BRO 

Many students come to this university with aspirations 

of higher learning and becoming more cultured; 

whatever the fuck that means. Frankly I just came 

here to sink legend amounts of piss a la fraternity style 

reminiscent of every american college movie ever. And 

while my own individual efforts have been respectable 

I feel as though I could always learn more, and become 

more bro than any bro before, yet I'm lacking a brofessor- 

someone with a degree in brology. Sure that Jules 

cunt is pretty frothy and got a good yarn or five on him 

but I need someone who can teach me all the ways of 

the bro. Shit like how to pull 100% from town, how to 

maximize bicep gains at the gym, and of course, how 

to do the 5-star skill move that is the keg-stand. Nexus, 

please seek out an ultimate bro to write for ya so we can 

get some testosterone up in this bitch. 

Average at best? 

ANONYMOUS 

Why is it that the people complaining not only talk shit 

in their complaints, but also never actually try and fix 

the situation. 

Let's take the WSU SGM. In your average-at-best magazine, 

there was an article about the SGM. Aside from the 

many, many grammatical errors (remind me why you 

have an editor?) and the inability of a magazine owned 

by the WSU to a) correctly give the title of a member 

of the Board of Directors and b) actually get some 

comment from the President, who works in the same 

office. Yeah, believe it or not, a member of the Board of 

Directors is not known as a "board of director". 

I also take issue with the fact that whoever wrote the 

article didn't have the balls to put their name to it. Not 

that it matters, given it was beyond obvious, but still, a 

bit of honesty would be a great place to start. 

Talking of honesty, I'd like to point out a few things. 

Firstly, "when the board silenced one Maori students' 

concerns"... Um, that's bullshit. One member of the 

board proposed a motion. The SGM overwhelmingly 

voted in favour of that motion. 

Secondly, apparently Aaron continually said he wanted 

to get through the meeting "so people could eat pizza". 

Not only do I not remember him doing that once, but 

at the point this was referring to, the pizza wasn't even 

in the room. 

Thirdly, the "woman who had spent most of the meeting 

trying to speak against the changes" didn't actually 

walk out. She stood by the door, still in the room, yelling 

abuse at Aaron Letcher and the Board of Directors. The 

"30-odd students, predominantly Maori" left the room 

not because they agreed with the person who allegedly 

tried to "speak" against the changes (I don't recall 

her speaking once. She yelled, attacked and abused, 

but never spoke) but because they couldn't hear Aaron 

chairing the meeting. This resulted in them not knowing 

what they were voting on, therefore meaning they were 

uncomfortable voting at all. 

And that's what I came up with after a quick glance. 

While I don't expect better from Nexus, I would have 

hoped that you'd at least be fair to the organisation that 

runs you. Sure, no one could say Nexus isn't editorially 

independent after this farce (and the one about the SGM 

process), but come on, this is pathetic. 

WTF WSU 

A REAL STUDENT 

How nice it is to see student politics emulating National 

Politics. Just like the National Party, President Aaron 

Letcher has lost touch with what actual human beings 

expect in terms of governance. The SGM was a farce, 

and the fact that he describes it as “extremely positive” 

is both laughable and a complete disgrace. With any 

luck, both the National Party and their WSU Presidential 

whipping boy will disappear into their own egos and 

stop fucking everything up after the election. 

Body Shaming is 

Not Cool. 

ANONYMOUS 

Fatties, can i have your attention please. 

It would do you good to take the stairs in the library 

rather than the elevator. 

Are you not ashamed of yourself? You are disgusting 

to look at and a drain on my future tax paying money. 

Drop that extra cheeseburger and downsize to a small 

drink. 

Thank you 

4 nexusmag.co.nz

To the Wild 

Banshee Woman 

at the SGM 

NEWS 


ANONYMOUS 

When you began to speak it reminded me of a meeting 

that you attended 3 years ago. Word for word. You have 

been doing this for a while. Do you have a script? Could 

it be that you get your enjoyment from acusing, blame 

and personally insulting people at the top of your lungs? 

We had two weeks to review the WSU Constitution in 

the context of what we were agreeing on in the meeting. 

And what we agreed on would be put into practice 

next year. And the meeting was well advertised. 

Yelling and Screeching did not represent the Moari 

people, only your agenda. 

Chur 

ANONYMOUS 

Johnny R Ryan likes his gangsta rap 

Drop the cliques and all that crap 

Walk’n ground zero, outcast be pound’n 

Lay so many rhymes, shit sound’n like an albulm 

But what does he know bout leadership 

Appoint that boy, you high as shit 

Always sit’n round saying chur to the bros 

Help’n strangers out like no-one knows 

Prob flirt’n up a storm tryna get his in’s 

Takin girls out to the flashest dins 

House five dollar pizzas, take the hint 

20 dollar bank, far that shit’s mint 

If I were I chicka I wouldn’t be complaining 

Rotorua rep, his dick be flaming 

No don’t get me wrong it’s not HIV 

It’s that rapid thrusting, stings like a bee 

Ko wai te kura, that Rukura flair 

Working hard through the summer like a dam bear 

And just like a bear, dudes working for the honey 

Livin a poor student life just to make the money 

Who am I kiddin, sounds great for the job 

Fits in well, with that WSU mob 

Not that I really care about all that political jam 

Just shout’n out to another good old honest man 

Got something to say? Email editor@nexusmag.co.nz 

GREEN CARD 

SARA LEMME 

— 

The Green Party announced a free off-peak public 

transport plan for tertiary students last week, to a mixed 

reception. 

The Greens have proposed a Student Green Card 

which will be available for all tertiary students including 

those training through New Zealand Apprenticeships, 

however, beneficiaries will not be eligible. As anyone 

who is a student, regardless of their financial situation, 

is eligible a number of people are claiming it is just pandering 

to students for votes. 

The main tagline for this scheme is that it will cost 

“less than the cost of one kilometre of one of National’s 

motorway projects.” The Student Green Card would be 

funded by reprioritising funding from the National Land 

Transport Fund with the estimated yearly cost being 

between $20-30 million. The Greens have stated that 

they also plan to look at extending the service to secondary 

and primary school students, beneficiaries, and 

in the long term, cutting public transport fares for all. 

The New Zealand Universities Student Association 

conducted a survey in 2011 that found, of the 67% of 

students using public transport, the average spent was 

about $35.40 per week, rising to $40.50 in Auckland. The 

Greens have pointed to the success of the Palmerston 

North transport scheme for students and staff which has 

provided them with unlimited free bus travel city-wide 

since 2004, and increased student usage of buses by 

38% with car trips being cut in half. 

Green Party Co-leader Dr Russel Norman said that 

“students are facing rising living cost pressures; transport, 

food, power, rent, but often have very restricted 

income. The Student Green Card is a way of helping to 

reduce costs to help students make ends meet.” 

Off-peak hours are between 9am and 3pm and after 

6.30pm and also include weekends and public holidays. 

Major benefits seem to therefore extend to those who 

are timetable-lucky without 9am or earlier classes, those 

who don’t mind being late to class, and those who want 

to use the bus for purposes outside of tertiary education. 

Not so much use to young people doing apprenticeships 

on site early in the morning until 5pm or those in 

tech-like full day courses. But then again, it’s more than 

the nothing Waikato students have in that regard now, 

where car trips are more convenient and cheaper than 

busing. Fuck you, Busit. 

5


POETRY 

COMPETITION 

PRESS REALEASE 

— 

CONFLICT MOVES 

TO LEBANON 

GABRIEL BANKIER-PERRY 

— 

Fighting with the extremist Islamic State group spilled into another country 

as the Lebanese town of Arsal was seized last Saturday. The Lebanese Army 

has reported at least a dozen soldiers killed, and several appear to have been 

captured by the militants. 

The fighting erupted after the Army arrested militant leader Imad Ahmad 

Jomaa, whose followers swiftly seized the town in retaliation. This drew in 

the allied Islamic State group, which has already gained large swathes of 

territory in neighbouring Syria and Iraq. 

“Let them release our leader and we are ready to pull out from all over 

the town,” reported one of Jomaa’s deputies. “Or else we will escalate and 

expand and we will ask for more demands.” 

The Lebanese Army vowed to force them out “within 48 hours” while 

Prime Minister Tammam Salam ruled out negotiations with the group. 

“There is no political solution with extremist groups who are manipulating 

the Arab communities under religious obscurantism and strange titles, seeking 

to transfer their sick acts into Lebanon,” he said in a televised statement. 

The spread of the conflict to Lebanon could be disastrous for the country, 

which is strongly divided between different religious communities. The 

militant Shia group Hezbollah—granddaddies of suicide bombing—have 

already pledged their support for the Army in driving out the Sunni invaders. 

The Islamic State swept to power over large parts of Northern and 

Western Iraq earlier this year and is currently battling the Iraqi military. It 

had previously been based in Syria, and yearns to create a new Caliphate 

to rule a global Islamic empire. The group adopts an ultra-fundamentalist 

interpretation of Sunni Islam similar to that of al-Qaeda and the Taliban. 

In fact, al-Qaeda kicked them out of their own organisation for being 

too extreme! 

Rhyme and verse make a welcome return to the Garden Place 

Library this month as the city’s central library celebrates 

National Poetry Day. 

A long-time supporter of National Poetry Day, the Garden 

Place Library will host two community-focussed events on 22 

August - the Spoken Word Slam and an Open Mic Night. 

Tracy Robinson, Hamilton City Libraries’ Community 

Outreach Librarian, says the two events give poets both 

young and old a chance to express their art form in front of 

an audience. 

"Reciting poetry takes skill, practice and courage," Mrs 

Robinson says. "It’s a performance, of sorts, and a talent that 

can sometimes be lost in our digital and online world." 

Ms Robinson says the two events will run at the same time 

in different parts of the library, so audience members and poets 

can be involved in both. 

The Spoken Word Slam begins at 6.30pm on Level 1 of the 

Garden Place Library, and is supported by Hamilton Slamdown 

Poetry, youth organisation Te Ahurei a Rangatahi and community 

broadcaster Free FM. There are two categories, Young 

Adults (under 18) and Open, with prizes including Movie 

Money, mentoring from a spoken word expert, and a Samsung 

Galaxy tablet. 

The Poets Alive Open Mic Night begins at 7pm on Level 

1, and gives experienced or novice poets a chance to recite 

verse. Participants can read two poems each, either their own 

or another poet’s work. Poetry from the Libraries’ collection 

will also be available on the night for those who want to give 

poetry reading a go. 

Entry to both events is free. Participants can register on the 

night or via email - hamiltoncitylibraries@hcc.govt.nz 

6 nexusmag.co.nz


BONNIE AND 

BONNIE JR 

SHORT NEWS 

— 

A mother daughter trio of bandits have been caught by police after an 

anonymous tip-off. Their crime was theft…from a charity box. 

The charity box was raising funds for a sick schoolgirl to have 

a trip to Disneyland and when Campbell Live ran the story, the 

Crimestoppers line received a call identifying the two. The 41-yearold 

and 20-year-old women were also facing a large number of other 

charges not related to the theft. 

Senior Constable Jake van Selm of the Waikato Tactical Crime Unit 

encouraged others to tattle on offenders by calling 0800 555 111 anytime 

anonymously. Safer communities together. 

WHYTE IS NOT 

RIGHT 

SHORT NEWS 

— 

Normally an Act Party candidate quitting politics over allegations of 

racism wouldn’t be a story except this time the candidate is accusing 

the party of being racist. Guy McCallum Dunedin North candidate, 

and current Vice-President of Act on Campus, pulled the pin because 

of his leaders “One Nation” speech. 

How bad was the speech? 

Dame Susan Devoy thought it was racist and she has been the 

reigning “whitest woman in New Zealand” since 1987. She is the 

Race Relations Commissioner appointed by the National government, 

which is a pretty white government. When the crazy white guys think 

you’re too crazy and white you need to take a long hard look at what 

you’re saying. 

What was so bad anyway? Whyte compared Maori privilege to that 

of “Aristocratic France before the revolution.” That was the revolution 

where all the aristocrats got their heads chopped off and Anne 

Hathaway was a singing dead prostitute. 

Jamie Whyte was basically saying the revolution is coming and it 

became news when one of his own party said you have gone too far 

man. What should be news here is that the rest of his party, Colin 

Craig, John Key and the entire country haven’t turned around and 

said either calm down or leave the country because that is fucked up. 

EXTREME STUNTMAN 

HURDLE JUMPER CAUGHT 

BY DOG 

SARA LEMME 

— 

A 3am high speed car chase last week in Hamilton has led to the discovery of Hamilton’s very own 

potential world-class hurdles jumper. 

The car chase began on Kahikatea Drive and ended an hour later when the driver abandoned his 

car by jumping out of the still moving vehicle and going on to participate in what Senior Sergeant 

Rupert Friend described as “an outstanding track.” 

The 30-year-old man was followed into the suburban areas by a tracking dog and handler for about 

50 minutes, where he appeared to have jumped some 70-80 property fences. Friend was impressed 

that the tracking dog and handler managed to find him after so long given the conditions. 

The extreme stuntman hurdle jumping crim was a disqualified driver and was also breaching bail 

by driving the car in the first place, let alone at speeds of up to 105kmh. The dog and handler, who 

kept up with the man the entire time did not want publicity over the tracking. 

7


NEWS FROM THE UNIVERSITY 

FREE AND 

UNCAPPED 

INTERNET IS 

COMING… 

— 

DON'T GET BIT-TEN: HOW SAFE 

ARE YOU ONLINE? 

— 

The Winter Lecture Series continues this Wednesday 13 August with a look at cyber security, a market that 

is expected to grow to US$94 billion by 2017. With an increased reliance on computing devices and environments 

such as cloud computing, are we exposed to higher risks? Just how safe is our information in this brave 

new world? Join NetSafe CE and digital safety advocate Martin Cocker; head of the UoW’s Cyber Security 

Lab Dr Ryan Ko; and online legal expert and Law Senior Lecturer Wayne Rumbles on how to enhance your 

digital safety. 

The Winter Lecture Series runs each Wednesday evening in August, from 6-7pm in the Academy. All lectures 

are free and open to the public. 

3MT ON AGAIN 

— 

Prizes and kudos are on offer again in this year’s Three 

Minute Thesis (3MT) competition for research students. 

Entries are now open and close 5 September for the 3MT 

heats and final. Visit waikato.ac.nz/sasd/postgraduate/3mt/ 

index.shtml to enter. 

TOYOTA 

GRADUATE 

PROGRAMME 

ON CAMPUS 

WEDNESDAY 

— 

If you’re driven and ambitious, Toyota’s three-year Graduate 

Programme could be just what you’re looking for. Come 

along and find out more on Wednesday 13 August at 4pm 

in ELT. 

From 6 September you can upload, download, surf and 

stream as much as you like without having to worry about 

data caps. The University of Waikato is introducing a new 

free and unlimited internet service for all students, available 

on campus (including Tauranga) via the computer labs 

or WiFi. 

Halls of Residence students will continue to receive an 

additional monthly 2GB data allowance for in-hall use and 

Lightwire will continue to be available throughout the campus 

as a paid-for service, and will continue to be available 

to all students off-campus including the CBD, DHB and key 

public areas. Please note there will be no refunds for any 

Lightwire top-up internet cards already purchased. 

JOIN THE 

CREW! BECOME 

A STUDENT 

AMBASSADOR IN 

2015 

— 

Know your Faculty? Want to improve your presentation 

skills? Like working with people and want a flexible role 

that works around your study? 

Student Recruitment is looking for a group of enthusiastic 

students to be paid Student Ambassadors for 2015. Student 

Ambassadors represent the University at events around 

the country, speaking with prospective students and their 

parents, about everything Waikato has to offer. 

Applications close 12 September at 5pm. 

unipr.waikato.ac.nz/student-ambassadors 

8 nexusmag.co.nz


DOUBLE STANDARDS 

OF NEW ZEALAND 

‘SPORT FANS’ AND 

THE COMMONWEALTH 

GAMES. 

SPORTS GUY 

— 

While watching the Commonwealth Games last month, something really 

started to really bug me. In most disciplines engaged in at the games, New 

Zealand is beyond stoked to just get a medal; bronze and silver medals are 

celebrated as if they were gold by the athletes and the media. Don’t get me 

wrong, I am more than happy for the athletes to react this way to winning 

a medal at the games; but I don’t agree with the media doing this only to 

drop this view when it comes to the Rugby 7s. 

Not long ago I saw a meme on some Facebook page of photos from the last 

Olympics. The top was a Chinese gymnast crying because they only got a 

silver; the bottom was the NZ equestrian team partying up a storm because 

they got a bronze with the caption (I believe it was) ‘Only in New Zealand’. 

After a brief laugh I realised the caption should have read “Only in New 

Zealand unless you’re the Rugby Sevens team in which case you’ve failed 

if you don’t win the gold medal”. Sure that’s way too long to be a caption, 

but, sadly, a much more realistic voice of our nation. 

So after hearing countless people saying “we haven’t lost in 5 games’. This 

is unacceptable” or “what a fail by the Sevens team”, I would just like to 

say that you can’t win everything all the time. This is something that people 

need to understand, especially bandwagon fans who only ‘take an interest’ 

in a sport during a big event. I don’t recall there being a big fuss over South 

Africa winning the 2009/10 Sevens circuit title, and there doesn’t need to 

be this time. Be stoked with the silver like we are with every other sport 

at the games. 

SPORTS GUY’S 

TAB TIPS – LINE 

BETTING. 

SPORTS GUY - OPINION 

— 

In recent weeks, line betting has become a good friend of 

mine at the TAB. Before then I had never thought to even 

consider using it – and I don’t know anyone else who does. 

Line betting works especially well in a multi bet, so if you 

like to have a punt from now and then you should look into 

using it. 

Essentially, line betting is giving one team a handicap; the 

outsider will be plus however many runs/goals/points, and 

the favourite will be minus. In rugby on league, you are 

often given a number of choices for each team. In sports like 

baseball and football you are only given one option for each 

team. I’ve been using line betting for baseball recently, in 

which the line is always +1.5 for the outsider and -1.5 for the 

favourite. In a lot of cases, the favourite at -1.5 pays around 

the $2.00 - $2.70 range. Although giving your team this disadvantage, 

it is a good way of beefing up your multi on a 

game such as the Oakland Athletics vs the Texas Rangers 

this season (A’s have the best record, Rangers are the worst). 

Simply put, if you’re confident in a team thrashing another 

team, or in one team losing but only by a little, use a line bet 

in your next multi to bulk up your pay out. 

Good luck out there, kids, and if you are having a punt, do 

so responsibly. 

9


RIDICULIST 

Actual questions submitted to yahoo answers. 

VOX POPS 

Vox populi is a Latin phrase that literally means voice of the people. 

1 

“My girl swallowed after oral now I’m worried she 

get pregnant. I bought her laxatives but don’t 

know how to ask?” 

This is not even a question, why does it have a 

question mark? Besides, the forest of watermelons 

growing inside her will surely prevent such a thing. 

2 

“Is it OK to touch yourself when you hear your 

parents have sex?” 

No. Just, no. 

3 

“I caught my son having sex with a guy and I 

think he might be gay. Is there a definitive way I 

can tell?” 

Dip him in Ribena, I heard that’s foolproof. 

4 

“I made Jesus shaped pancakes but I burnt them. 

Am I going to hell?” 

Very yes. 

5 

“HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPSLOCK” 

Stop shouting and someone might tell you! 

6 

“I’ve only been with my girlfriend 4 weeks but the 

doctor says she’s 4 months pregnant. How did my 

sperm get so powerful?” 

You’re just that good home boy. 

7 

“My wife wants to eat her placenta. Is that OK if 

she’s vegan?” 

I’m going to go with…. sure? 

8 

“What if the girl that thinks I’m the dad isn’t 

the mom?” 

Excellent thinking batman. Better get a maternity test. 

Carmel, Psychology. 

Are you going to vote in the WSU elections? Yeah I will. Can you 

name any of the candidates? Shannon Stewart. That's it really, that's 

who I'm gona vote for. She was my RA so I know her. If you could 

have an unlimited supply of something (not cash) what would it be? 

Pizza. 

Zoe, Psychology. 

Are you going to vote in the WSU elections? No. I have no idea about 

anything. Can you name any of the candidates? No. If you could 

have an unlimited supply of something (not cash) what would it be? 

Chocolate. Pizza and chocolate is a good way to go. 

Kelly, Biological and Earth Sciences. 

Are you going to vote in the WSU elections? Sure. Can you name 

any of the candidates? No. If you could have an unlimited supply of 

something (not cash) what would it be? Food. Chocolate definitely. 

Tim, Biological and Earth Sciences. 

Are you going to vote in the WSU elections? Yeah probably. Can you 

name any of the candidates? Candice Gollan. If you could have an 

unlimited supply of something (not cash) what would it be? Food. 

Oh actually can I do pens, I always lose pens. 

Kristal, Biological and Earth Sciences. 

Are you going to vote in the WSU elections? Maybe. Can you name 

any of the candidates? Lucy? What he said. If you could have an 

unlimited supply of something (not cash) what would it be? Travel. 

Sophie, Biological and Earth Sciences. 

Are you going to vote in the WSU elections? Yeah. Can you name 

any of the candidates? Only what they've said! If you could have 

an unlimited supply of something (not cash) what would it be? TV 

series. You can never have enough. 

10 nexusmag.co.nz


The Selfish Giant 

FILM REVIEW BY DR RICHARD SWAINSON 

The Dark Horse 

FILM REVIEW BY DARCIE 

Fans of the Oscar Wilde short story from which this tale takes its 

name are likely to be disappointed if they anticipate a literal adaptation. 

The story of two adolescent males from impoverished families in 

Bradford, Northern England, it is very much in the tradition of working 

class realists like Ken Loach. In Loach's 1969 classic Kes it is a kestrel 

who awakens the humanity of a young boy; in The Selfish Giant 

horses have a similar structural and poetic function. Any who have 

suffered through the inane reality television show My Big Fat Gypsy 

Wedding will recognise a cultural backdrop of contemporary 'traveller' 

lifestyle: one of casual theft and amateur trotting races on public 

highways. When the lads are expelled from school for fighting they 

enter into a dangerous relationship with a gypsy scrap merchant, one 

who has no qualms about getting children to steal copper wire for him. 

This is no feel-good entertainment. Writer/director Clio Barnard has 

a solid background in documentary filmmaking. Demonstrating an 

understanding of the story's social milieu and a clear empathy with 

her downtrodden characters, Barnard gives us an immersive experience, 

both tragic and poignant. If laughs are few and accents often 

indecipherable there is also great visual beauty. The stark, ugly industrial 

and domestic spaces co-exist with a countryside that retains 

vestiges of the rural, lending the thematic oppositions an aesthetic 

dimension. For all its bleakness the film is true to the redemptive possibilities 

of Wilde's original narrative though it is moot who, exactly, is 

the 'giant' referenced in the title. 

Directed by James Napier Robertson, The Dark Horse is a touching 

NZ film with all the right things in it. It’s happy, sad, funny and also 

frightening at times; overall it is just very heartfelt. 

Based on a true story, it follows Genesis (Cliff Curtis), a man with 

troubles, recently released from a psychiatric hospital who wants 

to share his gift for chess with kids of the community. Due to his 

inspiring and unique view of chess (as well as life), he unintentionally 

attracts the attention of his nephew, Mana (James Rolleston) who is 

struggling with his role in the world. 

This movie has a bunch of great actors who all work so well together. 

Curtis’s performance is fantastic, and Miriama McDowell and Kirk 

Torrance play great roles, as does newcomer Niwa Whatuira who is 

probably one to follow in future. The range of child actors involved was 

also fantastic and it was warming to watch them interact together. 

The thing I was most impressed with though was how moved the 

movie made me feel. It was how the roles, particularly Mana’s, made 

you really feel for the character, as you could see the shift in what 

he was portraying on the surface compared to what he was feeling 

deeper down. This was even the case for the already patched 

gang members, which I found particularly impressive, especially with 

Wayne Hapis role as Mana’s father Ariki. 

Overall, it is a really well done film with great acting and a 

great story. 

11


Go Down in History 

ALBUM REVIEW BY TEE SHIP 

Turn the Stone 

ALBUM REVIEW BY HP 

Sometimes I just want music to make me believe that it’s okay to 

punch a guy in the face… you know… like in a positive way… I 

think you know what I mean. On that note, Four Year Strong have 

just dropped their new EP, Go Down In History and my soul weeps 

with the memory of my initial pledge of lifelong commitment to 

the beard/tattoos collaboration. It was a glorious time. Go Down In 

History marks the first release since the pop-punk/melodic-hardcore 

band’s 2011 album, the slightly more morose, In Some Way, Shape 

Or Form. Since the days of the band’s debut masterpiece Rise Or 

Die Trying-the album single-handedly responsible for introducing the 

double-kick into the world of pop-punk drumming-I can’t help but feel 

that Four Year Strong have been desperately trying to recreate the 

magic of tracks such as 'Heroes Get Remembered, Legends Never 

Die’ and‘ Bada Bing! Wit a Pipe!’ While Go Down In History doesn’t 

necessarily reach the dizzying heights of the band’s glory days, when 

I hear a song like the title track ‘Go Down in History’ I think maybe, 

just maybe the boys have still got in them what it takes to create an 

uplifting melodic-hardcore album that makes you want to hug your 

buddy whilst simultaneously smashing his stupid face in. And really, 

isn’t that what good music is all about? 

The debut album from Hamilton rockers, Checaine, feels like something 

that’s always existed. It’s closer to uncovering something that 

may have been hidden rather than hearing a brand new creation. 

That’s a testament to the soaring vocals of Fraser Coombes, the 

power surge guitar of Regan Aspden and the fortress of the rhythm 

section comprised of Billy Dickson on bass and drummer John Bright 

that, as a unit, bring a timeless quality to heavy rock and metal. 

Opening with the melodic and multi-layered Open Cage, the 

album is a full volume, rhythmic totem to modern rock. The intensity 

builds throughout the beginning of the album before standout track 

Timebomb explodes. The lads are exceptional at moving through tempos 

and although Timebomb is raucous and pumping, other key tracks 

on the album include the slow and brooding Divided complete with 

delicate guitar picking and pulsing solo. 

With variance, power and big, clean hooks, this album shows the 

potential of the band. Coombes’ vocal display is deep and authoritative 

and is not dissimilar to David Draiman from Disturbed or Myles 

Kennedy from Alter Bridge, bands which Checaine could perform 

alongside comfortably. The album could use a little editing however. 

By the time we get to ending numbers, Bed of Nails in particular, the 

tones and sounds are starting to blur together. Ultimately, rock fans 

will love this and hopefully they’ll be marching down to see these 

locals playing at their local. 

12 nexusmag.co.nz


I'll Never Get Out of 

This World Alive 

BOOK REVIEW BY HP 

Skyrim 

– Legendary Edition 

GAME REVIEW BY KARL GUETHERT 

Steve Earle might be better known for being an applauded country 

singer/songwriter. Or being a heroin addict. Or maybe playing a heroin 

addict on TV hit, The Wire. But his debut novel is as every bit compelling 

as his music. Surprise, surprise he draws on his two favourite 

muses for the content: country music and heroin. 

Our unlikely hero, known to most as Doc, is a heroin addict living 

in 1960’s San Antonio, Texas, having been struck off as a doctor in 

neighbouring Louisiana. Doc supplements his growing smack habit 

by stitching up bar-room brawl victims and performing illegal abortions. 

But dope is not his only problem. The ghost of country music 

legend Hank Williams haunts Doc’s nightmares and the far more 

real Mexican healer, Graciella, makes sure his day is full. The trio 

navigate their own sins as well as those of the neighbourhood in 

which they live. 

Earle’s country drawl is the woven stitching throughout this book. 

He utilises his understanding of the South to perpetuate interesting 

and meaningful characters rooted in their setting. His wistful haze 

surrounds what is an engaging plot and a twisted ending. Despite the 

heat of the Texas sun radiating off the page, it’s a darker, colder novel. 

Heros and villains intermingle with squelchy similarity to history and 

fiction. It’s a blues fan’s book, a troubadour tale and that won’t be for 

everyone, but it had me from the get go. 

A game all about yelling loudly at dragons, this open ended RPG lets 

you go anywhere, do anything and develop your character as you see 

fit. You don’t even need to follow the main storyline quests. Kind of 

like GTA, though with far fewer prostitutes and just a handful more 

dragons. The Legendary Edition format (so graciously bought for me 

by a flatmate) adds in the DLC and provides some great boosts to 

characters who become Vampires or Werewolves. 

Personally, due to the sandbox nature of the game, I've spent half 

my time collecting raw materials (metal, leather etc) and smithing 

them into weapons and armour. After which I find a shop keeper and 

on-sell these for profit. Hell, half of my character's experience has 

come from what amounts to an in-game job. 

The rest of my time I've been redecorating my house (an interesting 

task considering the only way to rotate objects is by repeatedly 

banging them into walls). Admittedly the majority of this redecorating 

has been placing scores of skulls on shelves (I've got over 75), so my 

house looks more like a mortuary... 

There are still some pretty bad glitches. I’ve fallen through the 

ground before, and I saw one of my other flatmate’s characters plummet 

through nothingness from one level of a dungeon to another. 

One of the shops in town was completely missing once – gave the 

game an instant ‘Alien Abduction’ vibe. Still, these don’t detract from 

a great game. 

13


HØNEST MATT MEETS PHID FROM 

HASHTAG ME 

Honest Matt Matt Hicks 

For those not in the know who are the Hashtag Me crew and what are 

you all about? We are an online media outlet that provides a platform for 

podcasters via out HashtagME podcast network, we have a Youtube series 

called Hashtag TV and also review heaps of tech stuff and get to talk to a lot 

of interesting people from all walks of geekdom! We just really enjoy creating 

online media and telling our stories to the world. How long have you guys 

been doing the podcast/site/ radio show/ online show? HashtagME was 

started by V8Matty, Charis McAwesome and myself as a humble radio show 

called Hashtag Radio on Free 89fm in the Waikato about two years ago. After 

some awesome success on the radio with the live streaming and live tweeting 

we launched it as a podcast that goes to the web every Monday. We now 

record this in our own studio setup and it still plays on Free FM first but now 

goes to air on other stations on the Access network across NZ and our own 

podcast network which has been joined by two other podcasts including 

"Bits of Awesome" a retro gaming podcast, and "Access Granted" a cool tech 

podcast by Mike and Raj in Wellington. 

We really knew we had something worth growing after the show started 

trending on twitter every Saturday (even trending higher than an All Blacks 

game one week) so looked at how we could do more. We launched our 

website and started reviewing products we bought and reporting tech and 

gaming news. This seemed to hit the right spots with a few big tech firms so 

we actually started getting sent stuff and getting invited to some awesome 

events like Armageddon and Digital Nationz. Shit, we were even one of the 

first outlets to play on the ps4 and xbox one in nz! 

With all this cool access to people and products we really knew that the 

podcast was not doing the content any justice so we started filming it and 

invested some real money into buying good gear which became Hashtag TV. 

We must be doing something right as Hashtag Radio was nominated and a 

finalist in the NZ Radio awards and we’ve won numerous prizes and awards 

for Hashtag TV. Where did the idea to make this kind of show come 

from? We are nerds at heart and love talking about the tech, toys and social 

media stuff we love. We also wanted to meet more cool people so we just 

did it! I live by the mottos "Fuck it lets do it" and #GSD "Get Shit Done". The 

idea to grow from a radio show to what we are now was never our initial 

intention, it was just organic growth and natural movement into new ideas 

from our last project. Do you prefer the radio or TV side of things more? 

I personally love the Radio and Podcasting more as I don't need pants on, 

however I love the people and celebrities that I get to meet with Hashtag TV 

so I would say I love them both equally... but the online TV stuff is a lot more 

time consuming. What's been some of the highlights in your Hashtag 

Me journey thus far? The NZ Radio Awards for sure, it was cool being 

amongst the traditional radio people and being those guys from the internet, 

it’s a shame we were up against a Nelson Mandela show as we were never 

going to win against Nelson. 

More at sounzgood.co.nz and hashtagme.co.nz. 

14 nexusmag.co.nz


Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21) 

Zeus is pissed. Perhaps you should stop with the erotic escapades and 

settle down a bit. Ignore what your high school classics teacher told you, 

he is a God of philandering first and foremost and if you keep showing 

him up, he will smite you. 

Capricorn (December 22 - January 19) 

Your weekly challenge from the Gods is to pick up a book. That’s it. You 

don’t even have to read it. If you use The Art of War to squash a spider you 

have fulfilled your duty. 

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18) 

Now is the time to deal to the dead weight. If your flatmate doesn’t do 

the dishes, vacuum, or pick up their wet towels – cut them. Literally, 

figuratively, whatever – just don’t implicate Nexus in your crimes. 

Pisces (February 19 - March 20) 

There is no such thing as a bad photo – sometimes your face just looks 

like that. The way to inner peace is accepting it. 

SoundCloud 

Playlist 

BEATS BY J 

Leo (July 23 - August 22) 

You’re going to have a rough week. We can’t tell you what about or who with, 

but shit is going down. The appropriate course of action is to panic and internally 

screen all of the bad decisions you made last week so that you are prepared. 

Maybe skip class and don’t answer the door until we say it’s okay to come out. 

Virgo (August 23 - September 22) 

Be selective with the people you surround yourself with this week. That’s 

not to say you aren’t genuinely super-popular, but chances are you’ve just 

been to more lectures and they want your notes. 

Libra (September 23 - October 22) 

The trend is “norm-core” not, “I don’t own anything other than pyjamas 

and ugg boots.” The advice from the Zodiac this week is to put some 

fucking effort in, man. Hamilton is no Hollywood, and we’re blaming that 

solely on you. 

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21) 

Things are looking up! We can guarantee without a doubt that any risks 

you take this week will work out GREAT. Even if you’re a 4 reaching for a 

10 - okay nah that’s a stretch. Go for a 7. 

Hudson Mohawke - Chimes (Official) 

Hudson Mohawke 

Gent & Jawns - Turn Up (Kill The Noise Remix) 

Mad Decent 

The Weeknd - Often (Kygo Remix) 

Kygo 

Deorro & D!rty Aud!o Feat. iE-z - Hit It (Original 

Mix) 

Deorro 

Destiny's Child - Jumpin' Jumpin' (Logun Remix) 

Logun 

ZIGGA ZIG-(CAKED UP FEAT. THE SPICE GIRLS) 

CAKED UP 

Yellow Claw, Diplo & LNY TNZ - Techno (feat. 

Waka Flocka Flame) 

HOROSCOPES 

Aries (March 21 - April 19) 

Just because you can web stalk someone all the way back to 2008 doesn’t 

mean that you should. Just because no one caught you double dipping 

from the group curly fries, doesn’t mean you’re not trash. Key message: 

whatever you were originally thinking of doing, don’t. 

Taurus (April 20 - May 20) 

This week you need to carefully consider your footwear choices. This may 

seem small and insignificant in the grander scheme of things, but it is still 

winter and MetService predicts rain. 

Gemini (May 21 - June 20) 

Your word of the week is Caveat. A caveat to this caveat is that you must 

not use it in any situation whatsoever because it is kind of a douchey word. 

Cancer (June 21 - July 22) 

You are old. It’s true; you’re over the hill. Your time has passed. Better 

pack it all in and go home to Tauranga, buy a surfboard, and get baked. 

Who needs success? I mean, Einstein did all that and then he married 

his cousin. 

Mad Decent 

Dillon Francis + Sultan & Ned Shepard - When 

We Were Young Feat. The Chain Gang Of 1974 

DILLONFRANCIS 

Matrix & Futurebound - Don't Look Back 

Matrix & Futurebound 

R3HAB & VINAI - How We Party (Original Mix) 

Spinnin' Records 

Schoolboy Q - Hell Of A Night (YOGI REMIX) 

YOGIofficial 

Mt Eden & Reign Ft. Diaz Grimm - Hash Tag It 

Mt. Eden (Official) 

Attak (feat. Danny Brown) 

Rustie 

15


AUTEUR PRESENTS WWI FILMS 

Auteur Dr Richard Swainson 

Centennial commemorations around the start of World War I have 

begun in earnest. Auteur House jumped the gun a few weeks back with 

a display of our best films on the subject. What follows is a Top 10 List, in 

chronological order. 

1. Shoulder Arms (1918). Charles Chaplin took a risk sending his trade-mark 

'Little Tramp' character to the front but his audience proved well capable of 

seeing the funny side of trench life. The farce got closer to the essence of 

the experience than most propaganda films of the day. 

2. All Quiet on the Western Front (1930). An adaptation of Erich Maria 

Remarque's semi-autobiographical novel, in both pacifist theme and 

cinematic bravado this masterpiece has no equal. Brutal, uncompromising 

combat scenes of unprecedented scale and complexity co-exist with 

images of great lyrical beauty. All the more powerful because it dramatises 

the German side of the conflict. 

3. A Farewell to Arms (1932). The first, superior version of Ernest 

Hemingway's book about an American ambulance driver in the Italian campaign. 

If the ending is softened, Gary Cooper makes for a perfect Hemingway 

hero and the author's tone of disillusionment is well captured. 

4. La Grande Illusion (1937). Frenchman Jean Renoir was the best filmmaker 

in the world in the 1930s and this deeply humanistic POW drama was his 

biggest international hit. Silent star and former director Erich Von Stroheim 

- a villain in many a propaganda film during the war - is unforgettable as the 

camp commander who has more in common with the aristocratic prisoners 

than his own troops. 

5. Paths of Glory (1957). The only real rival to All Quiet on the Western Front, 

Stanley Kubrick's cynical polemic concentrates on the moral bankruptcy of 

the French officer class for whom war is nothing more than a grand chess 

game of career advancement. 

6. Lawrence of Arabia (1962). Atypical in this list in terms of backdrop and 

subject matter, an epic about the exploits of TE Lawrence amongst the 

Bedouin people. Openly mythic in its approach, it is less about the war itself 

than the flawed concept of heroism. 

7. Gallipoli (1981). An Australian classic. The story of a single soldier and his 

mates becomes the tragedy of a generation. We await a New Zealand film 

as good on the nation-building disaster. 

8. A Very Long Engagement (2004). Dazzling in its technique and convoluted 

in its plotting, this follow-up to Amelie from director Jean-Pierre Jeunet and 

actress Audrey Tautou has never quite got the recognition it deserves. You 

could not ask for a more heartfelt depiction of the horrors of the Somme. 

9. My Boy Jack (2007). A British television movie about writer Rudyard 

Kipling's son. Myopic to the point of blindness, Jack Kipling felt so compelled 

by his father's reputation that he insisted on certain death at the front. 

10. Parade's End (2012). A mini-series adaptation of the novels of Ford 

Maddox Ford, himself a Great War veteran. Though the war portion of the 

drama comes relatively late, it counts. 

16 nexusmag.co.nz


POETRY, PROSE & PREJUDICE 

Arts & Stuff Peter Dornauf 

How does one know what’s true, right and good for the garden? It’s a 

big question, one of the biggest. The answers can get your hands mucky. 

Do you rely on reason? Call yourself a rationalist. If you depend on the 

senses to light your path, you’re an empiricist. These are the two biggies that 

have recent historical clout. But there’s a stack of others out in the tool-shed. 

If its passionate feeling and intuition that does it for you, you’d be a romantic. 

I feel, therefore it’s true. Faith in revelation, as in some holy text the gods 

have shunted your way might make you a fundamentalist. God said so, ipso 

facto it’s true. “God said to Abe, Kill me a son. Abe said, Where do you want 

this killing done?” To push this one a little further, if you think God speaks 

to you directly, you might claim to be a mystic. Another variation on this is 

to trust an institution, like the Church, an infallible Pope, a convocation of 

bishops or some other ecclesiastical body. You’d be a paid up member, willing 

to submit, with all your thinking done for you. 

If your position is, it’s true if it works, then you’re a pragmatist. A variation 

on this is truth by democratic vote, that is, what turns out best for the greatest 

number. Slap on the label utilitarianism. If you think nothing is true, you’re 

a nihilist. A variation on that is to be suspicious of various claims to truth; in 

that case you’re a sceptic. I don’t know, is an agnostic. There’s a bit of that 

about. To put this one another way: Shit might have happened; but then again, 

maybe not. There’s a list of these shite formulations doing the rounds that 

cover everything from atheism: I don’t believe this shit, to Zen Buddhism: 

What is the sound of shit happening? Others in between are: Darwinism: 

The survival of the shittiest. Feminism: Men are shit. Hinduism: This shit 

happened before. Islam: If shit happens, take a hostage. Jehovah Witness: 

Shit has been prophesied and is imminent. New Age: This isn’t shit if I really 

believe it’s chocolate. Vegetarianism: If it shits, don’t eat it. Existentialism: 

This shit is meaningless. And many more. 

Strictly speaking these witty formulations are not first order methods but 

truth positions already arrived at. We need to back up the truck a bit into 

the loading bay. But how does one choose between rationalism, revelation, 

intuition, the Church, et al. especially when one contradicts the other? 

This very conundrum played itself out recently here in the city where the 

Reverend Hewat found himself having to choose between the Bible and the 

recent Anglican Church ruling over the matter of homosexuality. The Church 

finally decided to join the twenty-first century, ignore the Bible and bless 

gay unions. Pick your authority. Church or Bible? Hewat chose the Bible and 

handed in his badge. 

Time perhaps to sharpen the blade of rationalism. 

17


What is this Election about? 

JAMES RAFFAN 

Last week the WSU announced it had 33 candidates running for its board in the next 

election leading a great many of you to ask “Who are the WSU and what the fuck do 

they do?” The WSU is one of the few things Nexus actually knows some stuff about 

so we will attempt to answer most of the important questions. 

What is the WSU? The Waikato Students’ Union is actually 

just like every other student association around the country. 

The only reason it’s called a union is because in the early 70s 

the Teachers College Union and the Waikato Students’ Union 

joined together. 

So why haven’t they booked Shapeshifter yet? The answer 

is a slightly boring but important one. Students used to pay a 

compulsory levy to the Union as part of their fees. But some 

people from the ACT party decided they shouldn’t have to. So 

instead they added that amount (and more) to your student 

service’s levy which means the University now gets to decide 

how that gets spent. So instead of the money going straight 

to the Students’ Union for things like O-Week, the University 

contracts the WSU to provide certain services and gives them 

about 60% of the money they originally received. 

But what does that actually mean? It means a couple of 

things. A lot of people lost their jobs in order to save enough 

money to keep things like Clubs and Advocacy going. It also 

means your O-week is filled with more affordable acts (like 

Rockquest winners). The WSU could do what Otago and others 

do and put on bigger gigs but they would have to charge like 

$120 for tickets and if it failed they would be fucked. 

So who are the WSU? This is the cool part. With 33 directors 

applying the WSU is going to be whoever you want. You get 

to vote for a board including a President, A VP, A VP-Maori and 

eight directors. They get to be your representatives on boards 

and committees but they also get to listen to you about what 

the WSU should be doing. The Board also has some staff that 

don’t change so there is some consistency there. They include 

Dave the General Manager, Clubs, events, advocacy, and communications 

staff including Nexus. 

Wait, what the fuck- Nexus isn’t independent? You sellout 

hacks! It’s a weird one. The Managing Editor, Designer and 

Editor all have contracts with the WSU to produce a magazine 

but every other writer is proudly independent. Back before VSM 

your money went directly to Nexus and we could tell everyone 

to go fuck themselves. Now the University puts aside your 

money and the WSU produces Nexus. Still, you will never catch 

us shamelessly sucking up to the University for funding. even 

if they do have fantastic courses at very reasonable prices… 

Yeah but what does the WSU actually do? The WSU does five 

main things: Representation, Events and Activities, Advocacy, 

Clubs, and Nexus. The WSU board (should) make sure your 

voices are heard and your concerns are being raised. The WSU 

staff (should) work with them to make stuff happen on campus. 

So what’s different about this election? Numbers. Last year 

for the same elections there were 14 candidates for the 11 

spots, the year before there were 12 candidates. This time 

there are over 30 so something’s changed. The incumbents will 

tell you it is because this year has been successful, some of 

the other candidates might tell you that this Board hasn’t done 

enough or doesn’t represent average students. Another group 

would probably tell you they have chosen to stand because 

they don’t feel like the WSU is a strong enough voice on issues 

that affect them. 

Who do I vote for then? Think carefully, choose wisely. If you 

want a board that represents the diversity and culture of this 

campus then vote for that. If you want a board that represents 

the changing nature of our politics then vote for change, or vote 

for the status quo. We have our favourites but this isn’t about us, 

we need you to decide what you want 2015 to look like. 

18 nexusmag.co.nz


TAU MARSDEN 

SHANNON STEWART 

Standing for President, Vice- President and Director 

Studying Human Resources and 

Tourism Management 

Affiliation: Te Ranga Ngaku 

I grew up in Northland in a family of 12 in a house 

that was an old rest home with no proper windows, a 

leaking roof, dribbling shower heads, hand me downs, 

WeetBix and milk powder for dessert, the same school 

uniform for 2 years, and hitting the op shops for your 

ball suit. Those were the days. 

At 8 years old I saw an opportunity to change my life 

and go against the grain. I started doing odd jobs, 

working on the kumara fields, picking squash, mowing 

lawns, gardening, and trying to get school work done 

was a regular thing till I was 18 years old. 

I became tired of the same thing and changed 

it. 10 years later, here I am heading into a Masters 

in Management Studies in HR or Tourism management, 

serving on the Executive Board for Te Ranga 

Ngaku, Maori Mentor in the Management school, 

current intern at Waikato Raupatu River Trust, Elders 

Quorum President for my local church, volunteering for 

Volunteer Waikato and Habitat for Humanity, Winner 

of the Innes 48 Business competition, recipient of the 

Tawera and Te Ahurutanga Scholarship, and Coach for a 

local 2 nd division team and affiliated with multiple clubs 

across campus. I credit all these achievements to God, 

family, friends, lecturers, mentors, role models and my 

sweetheart. I understand a little bit about hardship but 

recognise that there are others of you, despite culture, 

who struggle and need real people, real support, a real 

President to voice real change. 

Standing for President 

Studying Law and Public Relations 

After a year in College Hall in first-year, a year as an 

RA supervising drunken shenanigans, and a year as 

Vice-President of WSU I feel I am well equipped to fill 

the role as President. As a fourth-year majoring in Law 

and PR, I believe that the skills and experiences I have 

collected during my time at university make me the 

best candidate for this position. 

My time as Vice-President has really helped me get 

to know both the organization and the students we 

represent through WSU events, our clubs network, 

and driving you home in the free vans during O-weeks 

– although not many of you will remember that. My 

time with the WSU has been an incredibly rewarding 

experience and has led me to put my name forward to 

lead the organisation into 2015. 

This year has been a particularly good year for the association, 

and I am proud to have been a part of a team 

that has delivered some real wins for students – which 

is exactly what the WSU should be about. We have 

pushed the University hard for longer library hours, 

free swipe access to labs, increased WIFI allowance 

on campus and cheaper printing – all of which have 

been delivered. We’ve also established a food bank for 

our most vulnerable students, and purchased a van to 

get you guys to and from town safely each week. 

Vote SHANNON STEWART for PRESIDENT. 

The only candidate with the experience to get the job 

done. 

19


PAPE BARRETT 

ROY MAZORODZE 

ZANIAN STEELE 

TAHA TANGITU-HUATA 

Standing for Vice-President and 

Standing for Vice-President 

Standing for Vice-President and 

Standing for Vice-President Maori 

Director 

Studying Communications 

Director 

Studying Maori Language 

Studying Social Sciences 

Studying Law and Labour 

Affiliation: Te Waiora 

Affiliation: Te Waiora/Waikato Tainui 

During my term on the WSU I have chal- 

Affiliation: Fresh Start 

lenged issues of 1 ply toilet paper, more 

Chur the chur fellow students of Waikato 

This is my first year at Waikato University, 

internet for every student, longer library 

You have a hard choice this year, with 

University. I am applying for a position 

where I am undertaking a Bachelor 

hours, free after hours lab access, free 

your ballot paper is more crowded than a 

on the student board to represent and 

of Social Sciences (BSOCSC) Major 

vans for students every weekend, the 

Deka in the 90s, it’s up to you to choose 

also be a strong promoter for student 

Political Science; Second major Maori 

list goes. My name is Roy Mazorodze. 

who leads one of the biggest organiza- 

advocacy, and a vehicle to deliver your 

Cultural Studies/Tikanga Maori. 

I am in my 2 nd year of a BeCOM. My 

tions on campus. Having been a Director 

needs and wants as well. We all know 

I am 18 years old and finished at the 

governance experience has been with 

this year, I’ve manned the BBQ and vans 

it isn't easy to leave the bar stool to go 

end of last – year 13 from Te Wharekura 

Student Job Search as a National Council 

during O week and REO, helped set up a 

to classes. So why not do our best to 

o Rakaumangamanga. I was born into 

representative and Waikato Student 

Food bank and fought for students rights 

show what support services are avail- 

politics’ at both a local and National level 

Union as a director. I would like to tackle 

over the last year. Now I am looking to 

able for us to ensure a safer, easier, and 

and I continue to be activity engaged 

even bigger issues and be the voice of 

take the next step. I have the experience 

less stressful journey through tertiary 

with many causes in this city. However, 

all students. Do the right thing vote for 

but also the fresh ideas to make a qual- 

education. Let’s also give you fullas 

I believe that representation at all levels 

me. 

ity Vice President. Having been involved 

a better voice and in the hope a more 

is paramount and whilst I am studying, 

with the WSU, Nexus and Waikato 

diverse approach on how W.S.U can 

why not University. 

Debsoc over the last three years I know 

improve and deliver their services. We 

I would like to bring change in particular 

what we need to create a great environ- 

know W.S.U has been doing all good, 

to how all students are consulted and 

ment for students and clubs on campus. 

but there is always room for improve- 

informed about major issues in our 

This election I am standing with some 

ment isn't there guys. Vote for me and 

learning space. I would also bring a 

fantastic candidates on the Fresh Start 

you'll see. Aurah. 

diverse personality to the decision mak- 

ticket who share my vision for better 

ing table however only after capturing 

WSU. Help me take the next step. 

the student voice. At the end of the day 

I would be your collective voice and not 

just for a few. 

20 nexusmag.co.nz


JULIUS DANIELS-MATA 

DANIEL FARRELL 

CANDICE GOLLAN 

LEONARD HARRIS 

Standing for Director 




Studying Social Sciences 

Studying Accounting and Law 

Studying Law and Business 

Studying Science 

Affiliation: Waikato University Cook 

Management 

Islands Association 

My involvement with the WSU has been 


6 Class Representative positions, 

three-fold over the last five years. First, 

Board of the Faculty Representative 

“E tu mai e oe ra, oe’a te vaka kia tere 

I was a contributor for Nexus from 2010 

Hey, I am a second year student in the 

(Undergraduate), Admission Appeals 

ki mua” 

to 2012. Second, I was on the executive 

process of completing a conjoint degree 

Committee Student Member, Student 

“Stand up and paddle, paddle our canoe 

of WSU affiliated clubs from 2010 to the 

of Law and Business Management. 

Ambassador and a Youth Leader, these 

so that we may move forward” 

beginning of this year. Most recently, 

Choosing to attend Waikato University 

backgrounds and experiences I have 

The University of Waikato is our Canoe/ 

I've been a Director of the WSU for the 

has been one of the best decisions of 

I believe are invaluable skills and 

Vaka and we the students must work 

past two years. 

my life. The people, the culture and the 

assets for me to take on this Role as 

hard (paddle) to ensure our Vaka moves 

As a Director, I've been involved with a 

institute itself, I want to give something 

a Director at the WSU. I have a strong 

forward in the best possible way 

number of things. As I promised in both 

back. 

Academic and Cultural Understanding 

Kia Orana, I am running for the position 

elections, I have been working with the 

I believe that it is time for a bit of a re 

of the University and you will often 

of director in the hope that I may make 

WSU President on pushing for tertiary 

vamp within the WSU, with some cur- 

see me Representing the University at 

a contribution in paddling our University 

bus fares in Hamilton, which we've 

rent elected members finishing their 

University/Community Events. 

to a bigger and brighter future. 

seen good progress on. I also stood for 

degrees or deciding not to run for re- 

I have strong leadership and commu- 

As a proud Cook Islander, I aim on bring- 

accountability and transparency within 

election, now is the time for to act; To 

nications skilled fitted for this Role as 

ing a Pacific voice to the union and stand 

the organisation, and we're slowly get- 

allow some fresh faces and fresh opin- 

Director with a no-nonsense approach 

to voice and express the views of all stu- 

ting better at this. 

ions to be able to help shape the WSU 

to matters that matter most. 

dents to ensure the continual growth of 

I am running for the #WSU3peat, 

and the Waikato University as a whole. 

So if you see me around, don't hesitate 

our University. 

because I'm very proud of what we've 

I strongly encourage you to vote in this 

to ask something about me (within 

In ending I leave you all with this Cook 

done over the past two years, and I'd 

election to allow your voice to be heard. 

reason) as I'm super approachable and 

Island chant: 

like to continue it. Vote for continuity. 

Vote #FreshStart – Because you’re 

would love to hear feedback from stu- 

“Taku Vaka Tangata E, Mua, Mua, Mua!” 

Vote Farrell. See fb.com/danielfarrellwsu 

worth it :) 

dents around campus! 

“People on the Canoe, Forward, Forward, 

and @danielfarrellnz on Twitter. 

Forward!” 

Kia Orana e Kia Manuia 

Kia Orana e Kia Manuia 

21


MELISSA HUGHES 

KALE ISAAC 

INDULA JAYASUNDARA 

NICOLE JEUNE 






Studying Management 

Studying Management 

Studying Creative Technologies 

Affiliation: Waikato Musicians Club 

Affiliation: Papua New Guinea 

I am a second year student studying 

‘Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. 

Waikato Students Association 

towards a Bachelor of Communication 

The first mouse quickly gave up and 

I'm an international student studying 

Studies - majoring in Marketing and PR. 

drowned. The second mouse, wouldn't 

a Bachelor of Management Studies; 

Hi, I'm from Papua New Guinea. I’m a 

I decided to apply for the role of Director, 

quit. He struggled so hard that eventually 

majoring in Accounting and Tourism. I 

second year student studying Bachelor 

as I realised the days of the WSU van 

he churned that cream into butter and 

am also the former president of the 

of Media and Creative Technologies, 

carting me to town during O week are 

crawled out like the winner he is. Ladies 

Waikato Musicians’ Club. I established 

doing a double major in Screen and 

over - it is now time for me to take the 

and Gentlemen, as of this moment, I am 

the club in 2013 and we subsequently 

Media, and Creative Technologies. I 

wheel (literally). I want to redirect my 

that second mouse.’ – Catch me if you 

went on to being crowned ‘Rookie Club 

hereby stand to represent the Pacific 

energy into the functioning and further 

can 

of the Year’ (2013) and also received the 

Island Students. I believe we need 

development of the Waikato Students' 

Vote Kale Isaac for change that will ben- 

‘Contribution to the Student Experience’ 

someone on the WSU Board to be their 

Union. I believe I hold the skills and 

efit you as students. Firstly I’ll look at 

award. I believe that my cultural and 

voice, add some island humour and 

knowledge to make YOUR experience 

prices on campus including: books, food, 

ethnic backgrounds will make other 

address any matters that need address- 

as students the best it can possibly be. 

and coffee. Then I’ll aim to create a stu- 

international students feel accommo- 

ing. I hope you can let me be your 

So pretty please, vote MELISSA for WSU 

dent culture that will continue, therein 

dated. Considering that 16% of the total 

representative as a Director of WSU. 

Director these upcoming elections! 

establishing a much needed Waikato stu- 

student composition on campus con- 

dent TRADITION. I’ll help make Waikato 

sists of international students, having a 

University the best it can be. 

fellow international student stepping into 

directorship could be a game changer 

for the WSU. My personal aspirations 

are to enhance the student experience 

on campus and to give the University of 

Waikato a vibrant outlook. The administrative 

experience I have gained 

throughout the years complemented by 

my personal characteristics will provide 

me with sufficient confidence to take up 

this position. 

22 nexusmag.co.nz


KAELYN KINGI 

SHAUN LETCHER 

KATE LUNN 

SAMUEL MARELICH 






Studying Law and Political Sciences 

Studying Law 


My friends call me Kaelyn, but you Re-elect Shaun Letcher – I’ve already 

can call me tonight... Or you could told my mum I won, and don’t know 

just Facebook me. I tend to be really how I’d tell her otherwise. 

good with advice. I mean, pizza and Some of you may remember me from 

hefty binge drinking haven’t been the last year’s election or free vans to town 

most successful problem solvers but during O’week. Others may not remember 

anything after their 8th drink, and 

considering I live off noodles and water, 

they’re luxuries! You’d think I’d have an that’s OK too. Before you go thinking 

awesome social life since I’m studying “party candidate” let me tell you, I’ve got 

communications, but apparently talking a lot more than a box of Waikato Draught 

with your lecturers and trying to confirm 

StudyLink payments doesn’t count. During the past year as a WSU Director 

under my belt. 

I find inspiration in song lyrics like “it’s I’ve played a significant role in delivering 

more of the things students actually 

the hard-knock life for us” and “if you 

think you’re special, you’re probably not” care about. Free vans to town during 

which is why you should vote for me; O’week,extended library hours, the 

I’m not special. I’m just a student who establishment of a food bank and free 

believes that the University of Waikato swipe access to labs (2015). 

is a place for you to succeed. It’s a place I’d love to be able to continue my election 

promise from 2013 and tell my 

where your ideas and opinions matter. 

Vote Kaelyn for Student Director! brother Aaron to shut up when he’s 

#StudentVoice #4y2k15 

being a dick, but he’s been missing since 

our SGM. If anybody has any information 

please contact the police urgently. 

I’d be stoked to represent you as a director 

on the 2015 WSU board. I’ve already 

been involved with the WSU, having 

stepped in as a director earlier this year. 

I’ve gained some valuable experience 

on the board, and am keen build upon 

what has already been achieved. In 

2015, I’d like to see a friendlier and more 

productive conversation between the 

board and the student body. The board 

works for you, the student, and I want 

to ensure that our actions reflect your 

best interests. I’ve had previous governance 

experience as a Hamilton Youth 

Councillor, and was the coordinator on 

the 2014 WULSA committee. I am keen 

to hear about what you’d like to see happen 

on campus, but more importantly, 

I’ve got the drive to make sure it’s actually 

done. Want better representation in 

2015? All you've got to do is tick the box. 

I’ve been lucky enough to sit on the 

WSU board in 2014, sussing your rides 

to town and working through marathon 

length meetings to help get Waikato 

Students a mint deal. 

I’m always down for a yarn but 150 

words isn’t a lot to work with. Hit me 

up at sam.marelich@gmail.com or on 

Facebook (or in person if that’s still a 

thing?) 

23


SHERIL MATHEW 

JADEINE MCLEOD 

SOPHIE MILLAR 

ANNA O’DEA 





Studying Biochemistry 

Studying Law 

Studying Education 



Affiliation: 

I am running for WSU Student Director 

I am a second year first year (if that 

and I am a current Biochemistry stu- 

In the words of Janis Ian in Mean Girls 

makes sense) after changing my major 

I am a creative choleric (look it up!) with 

dent. I am an extrovert which means 

“There are two kinds of evil people in this 

in 2014. Quite an inconvenience to my 

thousands of ideas and I’m campaign- 

you can stop me anytime without 

world. Those who do evil stuff and those 

life plan, but at least I got to experi- 

ing for a position as a director for several 

hesitation. I have many cultural values 

who see evil stuff being done and don't 

ence O’week as a first year twice. My 

reasons, one being that I love talking to 

and wide range of experiences and can 

try to stop it.” 

one year as an Education student has 

interesting strangers in Level Zero, and 

incorporate these experiences to differ- 

Well, WSU certainly isn’t evil. But you 

equipped me with several skills that I 

as a director, that’s part of my job. So 

ent situation. My aim is to help all the 

get the idea. I’m the kind of person 

believe the WSU needs. 

many of the people that I meet through 

international and domestic student to 

who sees things that can be improved 

• Competent finger painter 

the WSU have intelligent and often very 

excel with their studies as well as help 

and will work with 100% commitment 

• Can play 3 chords on the guitar 

interesting perspectives on everything 

them to settle well to our university. I 

to achieve that. Having studied a BA in 

recorder 

from hot political issues to fun facts. I 

represent the multicultural student 

Politics & Drama at Auckland Uni before 

• Knows how to enforce ‘the 

know that I can do a great job of con- 

body and other ethnic groups. Having 

making the switch to Waikato, I have 

naughty corner’ 

tributing ideas and putting my creative 

varying background of knowledge and 

a fresh perspective on what a student 

My policy platform is a triple-threat: I will 

abilities, energy and confidence (some- 

experience being in different universi- 

union can and should be achieving for 

remove the draconian rules that require 

times overconfidence) to good use by 

ties which can help you settle well in our 

students. 

all students to wear a hat at lunchtime, 

organizing and running fun things for 

University. 

I have experience working on success- 

I will reintroduce “naptime” particularly 

you. 

So vote for me :) No pressure :) 

ful local/national campaigns on student 

during O’week, and there will be at least 

issues, along with governance/admin 

one disco per semester. 

experience. I’m currently on WULSA 

For the skills, experience and ideas that 

as VP – Public Relations and have been 

the WSU needs, and a strong voice for 

involved with DebSoc & a plethora of 

the Faculty of Education, Vote Sophie 

other campus clubs. 

Millar: The candidate with a sense of 

Vote for a #FreshStart – Vote Jadeine 

humour. 

McLeod for WSU Director 

facebook.com/JadeineForWSU 

24 nexusmag.co.nz


BETH PEARSALL-PETERS 

MATTHEW JAMES RAE 

JOHNNY RYAN 

MOSES SIMPSON 





Studying Science 

Studying Computer Science 


Studying Psychology 

Affiliation: Gardeners Club 

Affiliation: Waikato Musicians Club 

Affiliation: Waikato Psychology 

You, the students, are what the WSU is 

Students Association 

I am creative, highly motivated and have 

I’m a second year computer science 

all about and I’ve really enjoyed helping 

a vision for an ethical, resilient and truly 

student and I invented Science. Well 

out where I could this year. Good times 

You may remember me as the duck suit 

sustainable future. We can get there 

not really, I actually failed physics in 

have been had driving drunken Hall 

from 2014 REO Clubs day, if so vote for 

by using our innovation, knowing our 

high school. I have lots of leadership 

students to and from town, dressing 

me! 

history and working collectively. I have 

experience, I was technology prefect 

like Spyro at Family Day and mixing the 

I'm third year Psych student who enjoys 

traveled to many parts of the world and 

and captain of the soccer team although 

beats at the Waikato Invitational Sports 

meeting people and riding bikes. 

see a great need for solidarity between 

Id have a hard time running anywhere 

Competition. 

I've been involved with WPSA since A 

all people of all cultures, across all 

now. I am the current President of the 

I’m 24 and in my second year of study 

semester and I'm loving it, and I really 

nations. I want to step forward into a 

Waikato Musicians Club and love playing 

after spending a bit of time in England 

hope to make WSU more fun and more 

more integrated and compassionate 

guitar. I’m a student like everyone else 

pouring beers. I’m all about dem classic 

efficient for its members and everyone 

society that values diversity. I would like 

at Uni but some students feel like they 

early 2000s jams and making the most 

at The University of Waikato. 

to see the University of Waikato offer- 

can’t be heard. I want to be you voice 

of this sweet student life at Waikato! I 

I would love to hear what people want 

ing more space for student expression 

as I can get the point across. Who else 

would love to keep doing my best to 

from their student representation and 

that is visible. I believe that education is 

is feed up with the level zero doors? If 

help students next year. 

from the university itself. A bakery and 

freedom and therefore should be free. 

you vote for me things like that could be 

I am also a sought-after relief milker on 

a student pub would be something I'd 

I want our University to push boundar- 

sorted with sooner. I’m an approachable 

the weekends, so you can be sure if shit 

love to have on campus. I hope to see 

ies, seek truth and lead by example by 

guy and if you want to talk to me about 

needs to get done, it’ll get done. 

you around campus. 

being a working model that showcases 

anything I’m all ears, such big ears. Vote 

Bonsoir! 

the world we want to live in. 

for a voice for others. Vote Matthew Rae. 

I’m not interested in having ‘WSU director’ 

on my CV. My interest is in helping 

you. Like a chain, one link on its own is 

useless, but connected to other links it 

has greater strength. A vote for me will 

help link you to a network of support. 

25


The Choice 

is Yours! 

PICK YOUR FAVOURITE CANDIDATES 

PRESIDENT 

VICE-PRESIDENT MAORI 

T AHA T ANGIT U-HUAT A 

VICE-PRESIDENT 

ABBEY TREWAVAS 

TEINA WALTERS 


Studying Politics & History 


I am a transfer student, currently in my 

second year of a conjoint LLB/BA majoring 

in politics and history. 

Transferring from Victoria University 

to Waikato has come to be one of the 

best decisions I’ve ever made. The differences 

in attitude, culture and not to 

mention the lecture sizes are just some 

of Waikato’s greatest aspects and have 

encouraged me to put myself forward 

for a Directors position for WSU. 

Taking the experiences I’ve gained from 

my time as a (poor) student, I have many 

ideas on how to improve some aspects 

of the University, such as upping internet 

allowances on campus and solving 

other issues which affect students. 

I am a hard worker, I co-operate very 

well and I will dedicate myself to representing 

the student voice. I welcome 

any questions, usually when I’m not 

cramming for that Moodle quiz I forgot 

about you can find me in Momento with 

a coffee in-hand. 


Studying Electronic Commerce 

Simple, leadership is the life force that 

runs through my veins. From the humble 

township of Matamata the local college 

was the start of my life as the go-to-man 

in times of need. Year 9- I lead the 1st 

15 Rugby team to 5 consecutive national 

titles. Year 10-Head boy, Year 11- head girl, 

Year 12 Board of Trustees Chairman, Year 

13 elected Matamata College Principal. 

Thankfully I was asked to repeat Year 13 

where I politely accepted to then go on 

and be elected Mayor of my hometown 

at 18 years of age. 

Don't vote for me to help me, vote for 

me to help your peers! 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

DIRECTOR 

26 nexusmag.co.nz

POLITICAL SERIES 

russel norman 

SPEAKING 10:30AM 

FRIDAY 15 TH AUG 

LEVEL ZERO 

+ COME GET GREEN WITH RUSS +


BANISH YOUR 

UNDER-EYE BAGS 

Sweet Tips Sweet Painted Lady 

Another request came my way this week and it seems 

many of you have been burning the midnight oil hitting 

your books, town (or both!) and as a result are awaking 

with the dreaded bags under the eyes. 

Here are a few quick and easy tips that will help minimise 

this in the morning before you dash out the door! 

Water. Under-eye bags are often caused by the retention 

of water due to high salt concentration. This can 

be caused by crying, eating salty foods etc. Make sure 

you drink plenty of water to flush it from your system. 

Cosmetic. If your under-eye bags are persistent try 

using your concealer and dabbing it lightly around the 

eye area. 

Cold. Grab something cold from the fridge; a cold 

teaspoon, cucumber or some cool wet tea bags 

(chamomile is nice) to help soothe the area. The tannin 

in the teabags helps ease the swelling. 

Allergies. Under-eye bags can result from allergies, so if 

you suspect they may be irritating you, see your doctor/ 

chemist for some antihistamines. 

sweetpaintedladynz.com 

28 nexusmag.co.nz


KEEPIN' IT UP, HOLDIN' IT IN 

Aunty Slut 

Dear Aunty Slut, 

How can I last longer when having sex? It’s getting embarrassing, and it’s at 

the point where I feel so anxious about it I’m avoiding it. My current girlfriend 

is amazing- she tells me she takes it as a compliment but I can tell she’s 

frustrated and trying not to show it. I know I’m not pleasing her sexually, but 

I don’t know what to do! 

Quickfire 

Dear Quickfire, 

There are a myriad of ways you can make yourself last longer, but before I 

outline any of them I want to say that there is more to life than penis-vagina 

sex! Life is not all about you and your ejaculation! The world will not end if 

you come too soon, but it might if you decide that’s the end of the sexy time. 

So you come too soon, big fucking deal. Keep going! You’re not really feeling 

it after you’ve come? Well your partner definitely isn’t feeling it if you blow 

your load in 30 seconds flat. I hope I don’t need to say the word ‘cunnilingus’ 

here- because I’m sure you’re already pleasuring your partner before you get 

to the penetration part. Right? Right? 

Anyway- often the easiest way to last longer is to come once, do something 

else for a little bit *cough*cunnilingus*cough* and then have another 

go. You can’t get hard for an hour after coming? What a shame… On a more 

serious note, if you find it difficult to maintain an erection once you’ve ejaculated 

a cock ring may help. It sits around the base of your cock and helps 

keep the blood in. They come in all sorts of colours and sizes, they even have 

nice tickly bits to please your partner. You can find them at any sex shop, or 

order one online. 

There are lots of ways to last longer, but in my experience, the best way 

is to have ridiculous amounts of sex. In the morning, at lunch, before dinner, 

and before bed. By the time you get to round four, you’re going to last longer. 

By the time you get through several days of this, you’re definitely going to 

last longer. Practice makes perfect Quickfire! 

If your partner isn’t around during the day- masturbate. Often guys try 

to flick one out in the shortest time possible, which can sort of ‘train’ their 

body that when it gets sexually stimulated, it’s a race. Slow your wanking 

sessions down and practice not coming by contracting your bladder muscle: 

imagine you’re trying to stop peeing mid flow (you can practice this while 

actually peeing too). 

Other things that may help: wearing one or two condoms to help lessen 

that orgasmic feeling (you can get condoms that numb sensation too), have 

your woman on top, or grind in her instead of thrusting. 

And if all else fails, go ask student health for a dose of Cialis. 

Send your sexy sex questions to auntyslut@nexusmag.co.nz 

29


PHOTOGRAPH: PHILLIP WONG 

RUN BITCH, RUN! 

Fitness Bro Lauren Barnard 

“...LOOKS LIKE A SOLDIER, OR 

A POLICE OFFICER, MADE FOR 

SHOUTING COMMANDS AND 

INSULTING MAGGOTS LIKE US...” 

I don't recognise the trainer taking this morning's class. Todd 

looks like a soldier, or a police officer, made for shouting commands 

and insulting maggots like us – but he's quick to smile, 

and his oddly soft voice is lost in the cavernous Sports Hall. 

A gauntlet of tyres and sandbags and hurdles is laid out like 

a buffet. I strain to hear his instructions about what the heck 

we're supposed to do with this wealth of kettlebells and fivegallon 

jugs. But Todd's gentle manner doesn't 

extend to his training; he's a powerlifter and 

avid Strongman competitor, and he expects 

similar ferocity from our rag-tag band of Tough 

Guys and Gals. I'm a sweaty waterfall before he 

calls out the first station switch. 

My partner today is a tourism student named 

Tiffany, who attends Sir George Seymour 

College and doesn't really appreciate my panting 

attempts at conversation. Her attention is focused on 

yanking tractor tyres forward with the full force of her petite 

frame, and righting the hurdles I've trampled before she can 

leap them, gazelle-like. I practice star jumps, and feel like a 

rhino. 

Todd's Strongman style is visible in his training technique. 

We lift heavy things relentlessly, repeatedly swapping strength 

work for shuttle runs, carrying weirdly shaped weights and 

keeping our heart-rates booming harder than post-war Britain. 

He says one of the aspects of powerlifting he loves is the 

concrete motivation. 

“In the kitchen or on the treadmill, it can be demoralising 

because it's hard to see progress. It takes time for the numbers 

to start going down, or up if you're a guy looking to gain 

weight.” 

But lifting is different. “You can see the numbers go up every 

week as you're able to lift more.” It's a solid, real-life payoff, 

and progress is obvious even to complete newbies. 

I consider. A month ago, the breakneck pace of strength-toshuttles-and-back 

would have had my whole body screaming, 

and quite probably landed me fainting on the floor all over 

again. I certainly couldn't have powercleaned the sack of 

sand above my head, or run high intensity intervals between 

my sets of pushups. I'm grateful for the progress, since the 

Tough Guy is looming in the increasingly near future – and I, 

and Tiffany, and Todd and the rest of the Get It Fitness team, 

intend to be ready. 

They reckon there are still a few seats on the free bus if any 

equally crazy folk want to join us. 

30 nexusmag.co.nz


THE LEAGUE OF METAL: AN INTERVIEW 

WITH NAIL FROM DEVILSKIN. 

Interview HP 

Nail is pretty casual about it all when we meet. “We were all at a loose 

end” he tells me. Sure. 

While Nail describes a reasonably nonchalant gathering of friends and family 

that just so happens to be Hamilton’s quintessential rockers Devilskin, I 

imagine something more like the League of Justice. Only it’s the League of 

Metal. Jennie Skulander, lead singer of Slipping Tongue may or may not be 

Wonder Woman. I’m not starting rumours, but have you ever seen them in 

the same room together? With sparring vocals that have turned the heads of 

Megadeth and fans alike, she likely convenes the League of Metal. From Axe 

Attack and World War Four fame, Paul Martin and his son, Nick, are in charge 

of the rhythm section and could be reappraised in a Batman and Robin role. 

And Nail… Nail, who sits across from me sipping at a beer and occasionally 

stroking a long fiery beard, well, he’s Superman. 

I know this for a number of reasons. Firstly, I saw Nail in his previous World 

Battle of the Bands winning band, Chuganaut and they were able to shred 

tall guitars in a single bound. And secondly, he conveniently doesn’t mention 

Kryptonite, like at all! Mentioning the world beating band of his past sees 

Nail look almost uncomfortable. He disagrees with the idea of pedigree. He 

sees no rhyme or reason for elitism in music. In the opening acts for the 

New Zealand tour by the band are a number of groups that have impressed, 

including some High School kids from up north, Alien Weaponry. 

“Yeah it’s a good opportunity for them to get in front of a large crowd. We 

know what it’s like to be hard working musos having doors shut in our faces.” 

So now Devilskin are putting out a crushing debut album in We Rise, but 

they’re also making sure the next generation of musicians have platforms 

on which to perform. See: Superheroes. But the hard working muso part 

is correct too. Nail explains that the songs have been built slowly at times. 

Organically. 

“Everything starts with a riff. It might be a guitar riff, bass riff or a drum riff, 

but that’s it.” 

Those chunky beginnings have been fleshed out in thick and heavy ways as 

the album represents years of work distilled into six weeks of recording time. 

“Some of the songs are quite old… but yeah they’re still exciting to play.” 

The recording process has been quite exciting too, getting the songs sounding 

exact has required a little bit of patience and, Nail admits, a certain 

amount of perfectionism. But while the new album has a structure to it, 

it doesn’t smack of perfectionism. There are grinding rhythms, smashing 

guitars and a certain flow. It’s as exciting to listen to as Nail is to be playing 

Altitude Friday the 15 th of August. Playing their debut album live in their own 

backyard is something worth checking out. 

31


PHOTOGRAPHS: BECKI MOSS 

LIFE ADJUSTMENTS THAT 

INADVERTENTLY SAVE YOU MONEY 

Cash Hacks Alix Higby 

I’ve had a pretty tough couple of weeks, and unfortunately dealt 

with the stress and lack of sleep by spending all of my paycheck 

in one weekend on booze and Thai food. This is obviously not the 

way to go if you’re currently writing a column on how to manage your 

finances… So this week I have a rundown of general life tidy-ups that 

make being saving-savvy a wee bit easier in the long run. It doesn’t 

always need to be about counting pennies! 

More blankets, less heater. Everybody knows this… But if you turn 

the heater off and chuck an extra blanket on you are snugglier and better 

for the earth. As far as I am aware, onesies are also still in season. 

Sleep more. And by sleep more I mean enough to reduce your daily 

caffeine intake to two cups and not have 4 or 5 or 6. Coffee is a necessary 

evil, but you can keep it at bay by getting to bed before 2am. 

Be conscious of your general health. Instead of curing your winter 

ills with expensive medicines and heating bills, prevent them. 

Oranges! Kiwifruit! Water! Regular exercise! Things are getting 

warmer around here, but it’s not bikini season yet – check yo’self. 

Work life balance. You may think working more hours will get you 

more cash, and technically you are right. But you’re probably going 

to end up spending that extra dollar on retail therapy for the soul 

once you realise you are seriously down on time for assignments 

and classes. Save yourself some money and sanity and put necessary 

tasks first. 

Be mindful of others. You have the capacity for kindness so use it! 

Doing favours for others and being a general good cunt will send your 

day on a positive spin. It’s much easier to make wise choices when 

you are happy, and you are happier when other people actually like 

having you around. Be that kind of a person. 

Stop complaining. In the same vein as above, if you choose to look 

at the positive side of life instead of focusing on all of the things going 

wrong, you’ll feel more in control. If you’re in control of your life, 

you’re in control of your finances. So be grateful for the small things 

and you’ll spend less on unnecessary additions. 

Go forth, be happy, and save your cash for things that are worth it! 

Like the good kind of ice cream and weekend road trips. 

32 nexusmag.co.nz


TUMBLR 

TRENDS 

A Fashionable Lifestyle Jessica Wilson 

This week I decided to educate myself on what is 

trendy in the world of mainstream Tumblr. 

With 10 minutes in the fashion tag and search under 

my belt, I am now prepared to enlighten you on how 

you can achieve the sexy Tumblr look. 

Statement Rings. Personally I think it’d be cooler if 

rings could actually make statements, for instance, you 

press the ring and it says “The howler monkey is the 

loudest of all the monkeys.” 

Dress Like Kim Kardashian or Kendal Jenner. I don’t 

want to write about this asshole of a family, so instead 

I will give you a list of celebrities who have admitted to 

peeing in the shower... Kelly Clarkson, Madonna, Ricky 

Martin and Kreayshawn. 

Look Like Miranda Kerr. Her face reminds me of 

those life-sized baby dolls every girl had in the 90s. 

These dolls gave young girls (and boys) the vital experiences 

of motherhood, at just three I was an expert in 

pretend breastfeeding and diaper changing. Children 

these days now have iPads instead, expect an epidemic 

of bad parenting. 

Skinny Legs. I was under the healthy assumption 

that box gaps lost their appeal alongside dreamcatcher 

jewellery in 2012, but tagged/fashion didn’t seem to 

get the memo. 

Headless Photos of Women. Their heads decapitated 

in battle, these women haunt the streets surrounding 

Starbucks. The Headless Women are only ever seen 

in complementary lighting and only ever captured by 

owners of a DSLR camera. Each demon has a large 

leather bag, hung delicately in her bent elbow, and 

inside are the souls of baristas who dared put full-fat 

milk in her trim latte. 

Faux Chanel. Let’s brainstorm why real Chanel isn’t 

as popular as fake Chanel on Tumblr. Perhaps rich people 

are too busy on Facebook to share their Chanel on 

Tumblr? Maybe the rich think Wifi is bad for their skin, 

so they simply don’t use the Internet at all? Like closeups 

of Pamela Anderson’s face, has posting images 

of real Chanel been banned? Or is Chanel just ugly as 

fuck? We’ll never know. 

Plaid Shirts. Wear one under a jacket, tie one around 

your hips as an alternative belt, or even alter a plaid 

shirt into a sexy skirt. Take it to the next level by tying 

a plaid shirt to your back whilst screaming “I am bird 

woman!” and throwing worms at passers-by. Hot boys 

will flock to you. 

33


FREE STUFF 

Louise Vs The World Louise Hutt 

INSERT INTERNET- 

MANA PUN 

Politics Ryan Wood 

Recently I was privy to an email requesting a promo video in 

exchange for “work experience”. Now, I’ll happily volunteer my time 

for short films (ultimately about telling a story, with little to no chance of 

profit) or charities (photo fundraisers, designing posters, etc) but expecting 

someone (even students) to work for free creating something which the 

company expects to make money from just made me feel worse than an 

asthmatic at a cigarette expo. 

While having a portfolio of work is certainly important, people seem to 

forget that in the creative arts, “work experience” is hardly difficult to come 

by. I was photographing the parties I went to in high school and that was 

my first introduction into event photography (ultimately teaching me that 

nightclub photography was not something I, as a small female, would want 

to get into). A few years later, having been put in charge of photographing 

my grandma’s 80 th , one of my cousins asked me to photograph her wedding. 

Using class work in a portfolio isn’t unheard of either, and some of 

“PEOPLE WHO LOOK TO TAKE ADVANTAGE 

OF NEWBIES IN THE INDUSTRY ARE THE 

SCUM OF THE EARTH...” 

the work I’m most proud of came from personal projects I did for myself. 

What annoyed me the most was that they were asking me to do it 

because my work experience “stood out the most”. The irony* that they 

were asking someone who already had sufficient work experience to do 

a job for “work experience” was obviously lost on them. My student loan 

is worth $30,000 and my time is worth between $50 and $150 an hour. It 

would perhaps be reasonable to offer someone work experience who had 

never picked up a camera before but it occurred to me that at the end of 

the day, they will get what they pay for. 

However, people and companies like that make me value those around 

me. If I’m ever asked to do something for friends or family, it always comes 

with payment of some sort, whether it’s baking, a skills trade or a fiver. I 

am very grateful to have people around me who not only value my skills, 

but the time, effort and money it took to develop them. People who look 

to take advantage of newbies in the industry are the scum of the earth 

and it’s made me realise how fortunate I am to have not dealt with them 

till now. 

*possible misuse of the term ‘irony’. We all have to have some flaws. 

Welcome to the second in a series focusing on the minor parties 

in New Zealand politics. See? That one on ACT wasn’t a one-off. 

This week we’ll be scrutinising the shotgun wedding of convenience 

that is Internet-Mana; a cynical left-wing hybrid akin to ACT and the 

Conservatives uniting to form Conservact, or some such nonsense. 

So before you waste your valuable vote, which my cat won in game 

of chance, take heed of these fun facts. 

What’s Up With Them, Dawg? Internet-Mana was founded on the 

principle of acquiring seats in parliament, so that their high-ranking 

list members can receive a six-figure salary for doing nothing. They 

are led by Hone Harawira, an old racist who, if he were white, would 

be widely reviled by all and sundry. They are also led by Laila Harre, 

who is kind of cute, maybe. I don’t know. I just like smart women. 

They are all bankrolled by Kim Dotcom, who made his millions selling 

internet to pirates, or something, I’m not sure. He screened, or sold 

movies? It was illegal, apparently. 

Snapchat Me Some Policies, G Ok, so Internet-Mana believes in 

taxing the rich, woohoo! And they believe in free tertiary education, 

woohoo! And the first twenty grand you earn is tax-free or something. 

Woohoo! The Mana branch also supports the Treaty of Waitangi as the 

basis of the New Zealand Constitution, which is utterly ridiculous. The 

Treaty of Waitangi is an unchanged, hastily-thrown together document 

from 1840. It has absolutely no relevance or applicability whatsoever 

to 21st century New Zealand. 

Meanwhile, the Internet Party believes in superfast internets, so 

you can play your League of Legends at 3am super-quick and clear 

all your jungles, or whatever it is people do in that absurd game. 

Welcome to Summoner’s Drift… is… is that it? 

Yo, I Am A Student, What Is In It For Me? Other than fast internet 

and racism, you will receive, as mentioned above, a free tertiary education. 

Yes, you! You will also receive a universal student allowance 

of more monies, regardless of how much your parents earn. That 

means you’ll be able to afford a few more brews to drink on the roof; 

chur bro. Get maggot, and other invertebrates. Mana also wants to 

write off existing student debt, so even if you’re finishing up this year, 

you’ll still reap the benefits of an Internet-Mana government post- 

September 20… as unlikely as that is. They’ll also force you to join 

the Student Union, and probably pay for the pleasure, too. Yep, like 

all good Communists, they prefer compulsion over consent. One day 

your grandchildren will ask you what freedom of association means, 

and you just won’t remember. 

So, there you go. Whether you’re an angry brown supremacist or 

a misunderstood white guy with a computer, there’s something for 

everyone in this weird mash-up. 

It’s like the Nexus of political parties. 

34 nexusmag.co.nz


SNAPPED 

Snap 

nexusmag your shenanigans! The best 

snap each week (printed with the Burgerfuel logo 

on it), wins a voucher from our mates. Claim it 

from the Nexus office at SUB. 

35


36 nexusmag.co.nz


Blind Dat 

BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE BANK AND 97.8 THE EDGE. EACH WEEK NEXUS ATTEMPTS TO MAKE A LOVE/ 

SEXUAL CONNECTION. IF YOU'RE KEEN FOR A DATE ON US, EMAIL EDITOR@NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ 

XX 

THE LADY'S EXPERIENCE 

In an attempt not to look like a tragic twelvie, it was all go for 

the ass hugging, low cut, could be “a classy prostitute” dress. 

That is if there is such a thing as a classy prostitute. Being first 

to arrive I was kicking myself. Luckily, my rather cute date for the 

night arrived shortly after and we decided booze would be the 

best option for the night. I must have done a good job considering 

the good people at the Bank decided I’d had enough, the 

waitress telling me “the boss said he thinks you’ve had enough”. 

After the two short hours it took to sink the bar tab, we decided 

I needed to check out his flat. Which was sure as hell better than 

my dorm room. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Let’s just say from 

the review I got, I may have discovered my hidden talent. Don’t 

you love taking the walk of shame on a WEDNESDAY at 8.00 

am? If I looked as hot as I was feeling…I’m sorry for anyone who 

had to see me. Too bad about his “early class”. I could have gone 

for round four…or was it five? DAMN SON, you had some skill. 

Thanks to the Edge and Nexus for hooking us up. “ 

PS: Your flatmates are fucking hilarious. 

XY 

THE GENTLEMAN'S EXPERIENCE 

Rushing to get ready, I cut myself a few times with the razor both 

above and below. Sprayed some deodorant on my cock, whipped 

on my still wet pants from the line and headed off. 

There she was. The Juliet I had been waiting to see was already 

at the bar ordering a cocktail. She wore a short, tight, black dress 

which outlined her nice booty. With her high heels on she must 

have been just over half my height. Perfect ;) I was taking this 

girl home tonight. I strolled over next to her looking damn fine if 

I don’t say so myself and did the old lean on the bar and joined 

her having a cocktail. After making some shitty small talk and 

$80 into the bar tab, we had decided to take turns ordering each 

other’s drinks. It was her turn to order when she came back to 

the love booth with cocktails and… 4 shots. I looked her right in 

the eyes realising that my plan A had just turned into plan D. For 

some reason I found out that a singer she’s embarrassed about 

liking is Little Wayne, I knew straight away this pretend good 

girl was a Prom Queen. The remaining $70 involved drunk talk 

and we began cuddling in the booth. I downed my last beverage, 

stood up and told her to follow me to the taxi. We were 

off to where the magic happens. I threw her on bed ripping off 

her panties in the process taking full control. It must have been 

after an hour and a half of rough fucking when she stopped me, 

shaking. I asked “What’s wrong, have you O?” She said idk and 

I found out she hadn’t before. I chuckled at how cute and innocent 

she was. I told her to just go with it as I put her legs on 

each shoulder. The next half an hour involved me squeezing her 

nipples while trying to cover her mouth as I didn’t want to wake 

up one of the girl flatties who’s a bitch. I finished and gave her a 

little break. 2 minutes later I turned her over and we started fucking 

again however my flatmates came home drunk and thought 

it would be funny to get the bong out and blow smoke into the 

fire alarm… I stopped and walked out erect in front of the flatties 

standing in the hallway with the camera out. Well played, 

very funny you cock blocks. I joined her in bed as they began 

booming “just put it in your mouth” on the stereo. The GB didn’t 

care and knew how to lick the lollipop as she began working 

down there doing this amazing ball thing. We fucked a couple 

more times that night before finally crashing out. I woke up to 

her stroking my back and slowly the horny girl worked her hand 

down and started fondling me and then again went down on me. 

I remember lying there in bed getting head at this ridiculous hour 

just thinking “fuck yes”. Like a gentleman I had to have some 

morning sex before dropping her home. Last thing I wanted was 

for her to have to walk home in her town clothes in the cold rain. 

I never got her number or last name, but she was the one that 

got away. Cheers the Edge and my flatmates.“ 

37


“THE SUCCESSFUL OPTION AT THE SGM 

ALLOWS FOR US TO SET ELIGIBILITY 

CRITERIA FOR PERSONS WANTING TO 

STAND FOR VICE PRESIDENT MAORI...” 

MORE SGM REFLECTIONS 

WAIKATO STUDENTS' UNION PRESIDENT AARON LETCHER 

— 

This week I feel I should use my President’s Column to clarify 

any fears or concerns that students may have about the Special 

General Meeting that was held on Wednesday July 30 th . I have 

heard a lot of misinformation being spread, which is unfortunate, but 

I will do my best to clarify the changes and outline the process the 

WSU will be going through over the coming months. The primary 

purpose of the SGM was to propose changes to the Maori representative 

position on our Board, and update outdated clauses of our 

constitution that were no longer relevant or required due to 2012 

legislative changes that altered the environment that student associations 

operate within. 

Our Board met to consider how Maori representation could be 

improved on Tuesday the 15 th of July, and decided to put what we 

considered to be the four best options up for discussion. We did not 

put forward one clear option because we felt that having the students 

make the choice themselves was the fairest and most appropriate 

way to move forward. For the same reason, the WSU did not formally 

endorse any one of the four options. This was not a conversation 

that began on the 15 th of July, but one that had been ongoing for 

some time. 

We were unable to make a move to properly discuss Maori representation 

prior to this point as our Vice President Maori position 

was vacant following the resignation of Andrew Marama-Lyon. In our 

search for an appropriate person to fill the VP Maori role we included 

the Tumuaki of our larger Roopu on campus (Te Whaka Hiapo, Te 

Waiora, Te Ranga Ngaku), two representatives from the Pro Vice 

Chancellor Maori office, and the head of Student Academic Services 

Division – as well as senior members of our own Board. This resulted 

in Steffen Van Lieshout being selected from a very promising pool of 

applicants. As soon as we had returned a strong Maori voice to our 

Board we got to work addressing what we believed to be a serious 

problem. Many may disagree that there was a serious problem, and 

that is a matter of opinion, but as far as I am concerned three of 

the previous four people to hold the role not completing their term 

in office is an issue for our organization’s health and the stability of 

Maori representation on campus. 

The successful option at the SGM allows for us to set eligibility criteria 

for persons wanting to stand for Vice President Maori from 2015 

onward, such as requiring a WSU affiliated Roopu to endorse their 

candidacy. The WSU will be actively engaging with the Maori community 

to consider how this will function over the coming months 

with the final decision to be ratified at our AGM in 6 weeks. 

The SGM was not the end of a conversation but the beginning of 

one, and I look forward to completing this process to strengthen 

Maori representation both on campus and within our Board. 

38 nexusmag.co.nz


TAXES: THE 

DUMMIES GUIDE 

MELISA MARTIN FROM YWRC 

— 

There isn’t an easy way to digest how our tax system 

works because it’s a bloody labyrinth, but I’m 

going to try. 

Here goes...New Zealand’s top tax rate (or PAYE rate 

as employers know it) for an individual is 33% for every 

dollar over NZ$70,000. 

At the other end of the scale, the minimum tax rate 

is 10.5% for every dime up to $14,000. 

In the middle, every dollar you earn between $14,000 

and $48,000 will be taxed at 17.5%, and every dollar 

between $48,000 and $70,000 is taxed at $30%. 

Before you complain that the government is bleeding 

us dry we’ve also got ACC levies to consider, so 

you will be docked a further 1.45 cents for every dollar 

you earn. 

Now let’s throw PAYE and the levy together – someone 

earning $30K, for example, will be taxed 18.95 

cents per buck they earn (17.5 plus 1.45). 

I also need to point out that if I have a sexy income 

of say $75K (wouldn’t that be nice) only the $5K will 

be taxed at 33%, every dollar from $70k down to $48k 

will be taxed 30% and so on. 

Phew...my head is spinning trying to translate taxes 

into good old fashioned English. 

If you suspect you’re being taxed too much don’t 

forget to calculate your Kiwisaver deduction as well – 

so many people scream fire forgetting they are tucking 

3% aside for their retirement. 

If this doesn’t make sense (hey we tried) then give 

us a tinkle. 

DISCIPLINARY PROBLEMS? 

AMBER CARDALE & LAURENCE MCLEAN 

— 

Every week our column presents to you some serious shit that the student support 

advocates are here to help you with. This week’s fast facts are all about the Student 

Disciplinary Committee. This is actually some pretty serious shit so there’s not many 

as many jokes this week- but can you still spot the lie? 

• The Student Disciplinary Committee is a group of staff and students who 

investigate allegations of plagiarism or misconduct that have occurred 

on campus. 

• It includes a chairperson, administrator, lecturers, and students. 

• As a student you are entitled to a support person #advocacyfriends 

• Plagiarism comes from the Latin word plague because in the 18th century 

students were thought to be less clean than everybody else and the source 

of diseases in society. 

• Plagiarism includes things like: copying another student’s assignment, copying 

sources without proper referencing, getting someone else to do your 

assignment, submitting one of your own assignments from another paper 

(yes, you can plagiarise yourself!), and submitting the same assignment as 

other people in your class. 

• If you are called to appear before the committee you will be sent a letter 

outlining the situation as well as making a time for you to sit down with the 

committee and explain your side of the situation. 

• How can we help, I hear you ask? We can walk you through the process, help 

you write a submission to the committee if you choose to, be your support 

person at the meeting, or sometimes we can even speak on your behalf. Think 

of us at your misconduct ninjas, chur! 

• So how can you protect yourself against the supervillain Dr Plagiarism? 

Apart from the dashingly handsome, yet extremely good looking team at the 

WSU Advocacy Office, the rest of the League of Extraordinary Supporters 

includes: the noble team at Student Learning, the brave men and women at 

the Library, your home town hero – your lecturer, and the incredibles at the 

International Office. 

Send out an SOS if you find yourself in need stop by SUB building opposite UniMart. 

Contact: 0800 AT YWRC, ywrc@xtra.co.nz. 

Contact: advocacy@wsu.org.nz or 027 2065 011. Or make an appointment at wsu.org.nz. 

39


40 nexusmag.co.nz


CHICKEN SALAD 

Cooking for Students Zac Lyon 

Carrying on from last week, I promised a meal with meat in it that 

won’t break an already broken bank account. ‘You can’t break something 

that is already broke’- well I beg to differ. Anyway, meat is a 

perfect source of protein, a fairly good option to stinky tofu – only 

by a bit… 

Mince is a student’s best friend but, while versatile, it isn’t going to 

win any awards as you try to impress that special someone. Chicken 

is where it is at, yo. Breasts, thighs, (sounds pretty good so far...) 

drumsticks, cutlets. Nearly one of these is on special at the supermarket 

each week at trusty ol’ Pak-n-Save. 

Ingredients 

2-4 chicken breasts (can really be any chicken type) 

Handful of thyme 

Juice of 1 lemon 

Salt and pepper 

3 cloves of garlic 

250g cherry tomatoes 

1 french stick 

Olive oil 

Large handful of fresh green beans 

1 tsp wholegrain mustard 

2 Tbs white vinegar 

Parsley and mint to garnish 

Directions 

01_ Marinate your chicken in the thyme, lemon, salt and pepper. 

02_ Throw your breasts into an oiled pan on a high heat (chicken 

breasts that is) and cook for roughly 10 mins, or until both 

sides are golden. Check to see if juices run clear. If pink, cook a 

wee bit longer. 

03_ Cook your cherry tomatoes with the cloves of garlic until skin 

starts to split and set aside. 

04_ Roughly cut your French stick into 1 cm cubes and douse 

them in oil, salt them and throw them under the grill to make 

some crunch croutons. 

05_ Steam your beans. Once heated through, not too soft (nobody 

likes it when it’s too soft), add in mustard, and vinegar. 

06_ Chop your chicken, place on a large plate. Throw in tomatoes/ 

garlic, dressed beans and croutons. 

07_ Drizzle over chicken rest juices plus any mustard and vinegar. 

Finish with mint or parsley. 

If you get stuck, head to Cooking4Students on Youtube. 

41


Codewords 

Each letter in this puzzle is represented by a number 1-26. 

Crack the code to solve the crossword. 

KenKen 

Sequence 

The bolded groups of squares are called “cages.” In the 

What shape comes next? 

upper-left corner of each cage, there is a “target number” 

and a math operation. Fill in each square of a cage 

with a number between 1-9. The numbers in a cage must 

combine—in any order, using only that cage’s math operation—to 

form that cage’s target number. You may not 

repeat a number in any row or column but you can repeat 

a number within a cage. Example: Your target number is 5, 

your operation is addition, you’re using the numbers 1–9, 

and the cage is made up of two squares. You could fill in 2 

and 3 (because 2 + 3 = 5) or 1 and 4 (1 + 4 = 5) 

Syllabic 

From the following syllables and clues, form 

ten words of a least two syllables. 

a - al - al - al - am - cy - de - e - emp - fy - gan 

- gate - gi - i - is - ka - ka - ka - mi - mor - mys 

- nav - net - per - plu - ra - re - ry - thyst - ti - 

tic - tic - to - toc - ze 

1. A european plant: 

2. Purple or white quartz: 

3. Without moral quality: 

4. To rid of mystery: 

5. Very large: 

6. Wild, reckless, destructive person: 

7. To direct or manage: 

8. Positive or assertive in speech, etc: 

9. Government or state in which the wealthy class rules: 

10. Based on what is real: 

Draw answer here. 

Sudoku 

Enter numbers into the blank spaces so that each row, 

column and 3x3 box contains the numbers 1-9. 

EASY 

MEDUIM 

HARD 

42 nexusmag.co.nz


Target 

How many four (or more) 

letter words can you make 

from the letters in the 

square without using proper 

nouns? Each word must 

contain the centre letter. 

9 letter words casuistic 

8 letter words caustics 7 

letter words casuist caustic 

6 letter words cactus 

5 letter words ascus cutis 

ictus scuta situs suits 4 

letter words cuss cuts 

scut suit taus 

Crossword 

Solve the clues and fill in the words. 

Answers for this crossword are in the online magazine at nexusmag.co.nz. 

Across 

39. Entail (7) 

73. Prominent (5) 

11. Command (5) 

52. Beverage made from 

1. Amphibians (5) 

40. Attribute (5) 

75. Resided (7) 

14. Oblique (7) 

apple juice (5) 

4. Heading (7) 

42. Notions (5) 

76. Acted out (7) 

16. Herbaceous plant (7) 

53. Currency of Pakistan (5) 

8. Strongroom (5) 

44. Large feline (7) 

77. Sport (9) 

21. Sore (7) 

56. All together (2,5) 

10. Latin-American dance(5) 

46. Made reference to (5) 

78. Lubricated (5) 

23. Boredom (5) 

57. Stark (7) 

12. Essential (9) 

47. Building (7) 

79. Planet (5) 

25. Paragon (5) 

59. Exuberant (9) 

13. Lasted (7) 

49. Japanese speciality (5) 

80. Custodian (7) 

26. Warned (7) 

61. Resolved (7) 

15. Wandered aimlessly (7) 

50. Mature (5) 

81. Laconic (5) 

28. Bottomless pit (5) 

63. Disorderly (7) 

17. Ophidian (5) 

51. Tooth (7) 

29. Cutting tool (6) 

64. Excerpt (7) 

18. Entice (5) 

54. Chortle (5) 

Down 

31. Elixirs (7) 

66. Previously (7) 

19. Developed (7) 

55. Promised (7) 

1. Eyeteeth (5) 

32. Enclose (7) 

67. Conundrum (6) 

20. Change (5) 

57. Asserted (7) 

2. Grove (7) 

34. Respiration (9) 

68. Sound (5) 

22. Evade (5) 

58. Arrest (9) 

3. Hung (9) 

36. Insignificant (7) 

70. Rubbish (5) 

24. Dens (5) 

60. Fabric (6) 

4. Brag (5) 

38. Springing (7) 

71. Church officer (5) 

26. Particle (4) 

62. Requests (4) 

5. Unfathomable (7) 

41. Memory loss (7) 

72. Abominate (5) 

27. Leg bone (6) 

63. Hex (5) 

6. Feckless (5) 

43. Gourmet (7) 

74. Result (5) 

30. Impertinence (9) 

65. Musical work (5) 

7. Useful device (7) 

45. Mock (6) 

33. Flags (7) 

68. Item of value (5) 

8. Sign of the zodiac (5) 

46. Tapers (7) 

35. Tableware (7) 

69. Inactivity (7) 

9. Broadside (6) 

48. Anteater (7) 

37. Calamitous (5) 

71. Minor actor (5) 

10. Large drum (7) 

49. Full of flavour (5) 

43


44 nexusmag.co.nz

NEXUS ISSUE 17 2014

Create successful ePaper yourself

Delete template?

Save as template?