ENCOURAGER

Everyone Goes Home
By Andrew Starnes
Everyone goes home but will your
family be there?
The fire service is an occupation like
none other. It is one of brotherhood,
sacrifice, and courage. It is a second
family that you are grafted into the
day you become a firefighter. As a
firefighter you work many hours
a c q u i r i n g y o u r n e c e s s a r y
certifications, degrees, and work hard
to maintain a level of combat
readiness mentally & physically. A
firefighter who is truly passionate
about his or her calling possesses the
ability to influence, change, and
positively impact other lives.
But then there is the dark side of our
ambition that is not often talked
about…
As you progress through your career
you begin to work harder at making a
difference and your efforts begin to
pay off. You are well-respected,
teach/train/mentor others, and you
are highly sought after for your
expertise. The trouble lies in the
earlier statement: The fire department
is your second family. Approximately
75% (9 out of 12) of firefighters will
suffer a divorce.
Many of us came into the fire service
with a loving family who have
supported us, encouraged us, and
watched after our children while we
worked, went to school, or while we
were “improving the fire service”. So
why is it that we as firefighters, who
took an oath to lay down our lives for
the public if necessary, have
forgotten about our families at home?
Are not our spouse & children our
greatest investment? Aren’t they our
“crew”? Are they not the reason
“everyone goes home”? As scripture
states “you have forgotten your first
love”.
We spend thousands of hours
perfecting our craft, becoming
certified, and working to be the best
that we can be. How many hours are
we dedicating to learning to be a
good husband/wife and a good
father/mother? How much time are
we spending with our family where
are mind is truly on them? Is your
mind elsewhere?
We are taught that if we are
distracted we can make mistakes on
the fire-ground. We preach situational
awareness, taking pride in what you
do, and not becoming complacent.
Why is it we not practicing what we
preach at home? The statistical data
proves that we are at a greater risk
for heart attack, cancer, and several
other occupationally related illnesses.
And that data shows that we are at a
much greater risk of divorce than
anyone else. So why are we putting
the cart before the horse?
My friends, the answer lies in our
priorities & core values. Your core
values determine who you are. You
are a good firefighter because of your
v a l u e s s u c h a s : i n t e g r i t y ,
c o m p a s s i o n , c o u r a g e , h o n o r,
honesty, etc. These core values
where (hopefully) instilled in you by
your family. If you believe in God, as I
do, then your priorities are to be:
God, family, then your fire department
family, and others. You are to work so
that you may live. You should not
“live to work”. If your priorities are out
of order you will one day find yourself
s t a r i n g a t re t i re m e n t p a p e r s
wondering if you will be able to live
without this job. When you leave this
earth you leave behind two things:
your word & your children.
Being a firefighter means you are
never off duty. Your drive to serve
your fellow man goes deeper than
any patch, badge, or title that man
c a n b e s t o w u p o n y o u . T h e
commitment to your calling as a
firefighter should be based on the
depth of your great love for your
family at home and your desire to go
home safely to them.
In closing, remember we are blessed
with two families. Keep “your home”
family first & your fire department
family second and your house will
always remain in order. Let’s practice
what we preach at home and at work.
“Just as firefighters are willing to
rescue someone from a
burning building, Christian firefighters
must be willing to come to the aid of
hurting
firefighters before their marriages end
in divorce.” Dr. James Dobson
Stay safe & God Bless,
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