46 • <strong>February</strong>/<strong>March</strong> <strong>2016</strong>
I Love Us... Mary Ann Kirby Ah, Valentine’s Day. My earliest thoughts of the beloved celebration date back to the third grade and are of tiny die-cut cards stating such simple messages like, “Some-bunny loves you” and, “Will you be mine?” I can remember the importance of finding just the right cards to give out, too. No way did I want anything too mushy or anything. Picking out the card was serious business. They would eventually be placed in individually decorated brown paper sacks that were taped to the back of everyone’s little-person sized desk. Love was so easy. Years later, flowers and gigantic helium balloons were the must-have order of the day, often delivered to the workplace. I was never the recipient of such over-the-top deliveries and was even admittedly a bit jealous of those who were. I mean, had they somehow figured out a secret code to love that I hadn’t? And how were you supposed to get those big ol’ things home anyway? I eventually married in my early thirties. Prior to that time, while I managed a couple of fairly decent relationships, I was mostly single–a lot. I mean, there were easier things in life than trying to find a nice guy, you know. Like nailing jelly to a tree. But it was worth the wait. I would eventually find my perfect match and we will celebrate 17 years of marriage this year. Yay! So as I look through the thousands of cards at the store and contemplate the message I want to convey, I’m struck by a simple yet powerful thought. I love us. In reality, the card I’m looking for should say, “Happy Valentine’s Day. Who, in a million years, would have ever thought that I’d be standing here for the umteenth time looking through this sea of red and pink hearts? But, despite the fact that I get grumpy and have unpredictable mood swings, you keep coming home–and I thank you for that. And even though you’ve yet to develop the ability to read my mind, I continue to love you anyway. We’ve made a pretty darn fabulous kid that, with any luck, will think marriage is a good thing after watching us. So, there’s that. Happy Valentine’s Day! I love us.” There need to be cards with those types of “real” messages. Someone could make a fortune. Relationships are hard. All relationships. And they take work. Anything worth having, does. And while my husband and I have certainly made a good run so far, we’ve definitely had our moments– but we always manage to work through them. Eventually, we even laugh it off. Laughter is about connection, and laughter and love go hand-in-hand. So while I might not be one of those that gets $100 worth of helium delivered to the front door, I will get a funny card from my fella. It will likely still be in the store bag from which it was bought along with one of my favorite Hollywood gossip-type magazines and a box of little white powdered donuts. He knows they’re my favorite and that means the world to me. The truth is that love isn’t always perfect. It isn’t a fairytale or a storybook and it doesn’t always come easy. Love is overcoming obstacles, facing challenges, fighting to be together, holding on, and never letting go. It’s a short word that’s easy to spell, difficult to define, and impossible to live without. Love is work, but most of all, love is realizing that every hour, and every minute, and every second of it was worth it–because you did it together. Maybe more marriages would survive if people knew that sometimes the “better” comes after the “worse.” And that’s ok. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, over and over, with the same person. I’m thankful for my person. I really do love us. ♥ <strong>Hometown</strong> <strong>Rankin</strong> • 47