half-girlfriend-chetan-bhagat

8. Calling call centres and choosing the English option.
9. Reading out English advertisements on street hoardings.
10. Reading simple English novels.
I whistled.
‘It’s a different approach,’ she said. She walked me through the ten
steps and spoke non-stop for a few minutes, explaining each step.
‘And last, reading simple English novels, like, the one by that
writer, what’s his name, Chetan Bhagat,’ she said, ending her
monologue.
I watched her face, pretty as always. Do not fall for her again, I
screamed in my head.
‘So, let us start. Talk to me in English.’
I switched to English. The English I knew at that time, that is.
‘I am...very...thankful...for your making the list...for learning the
English,’ I said.
‘Thank you for making this list of steps to learn English,’ Riya said.
She spoke in a calm voice, without sarcasm or judgement.
‘Yes, same thing only.’
‘So instead of “same thing only”, say “I meant the same”,’ Riya
said. ‘I will correct you sometimes. It is not that I don’t understand
you. I just want to make sure you say it right.’
‘Thanks,’ I said.
‘Now that one word was correct.’
I laughed.
She made me talk to the waiter in English. I did fine, since the
waiter’s English was worse than mine. She didn’t correct me when the
waiter was around anyway.
‘And sweet.. .later,’ I said as he left us.
‘We will order the sweet dish later,’ Riya said, ‘or, dessert instead
of sweet dish.’
‘Desert? Like Rajasthan desert?’ I said.
‘D.E.S.S.E.R.T. Different word, same sound.’
‘I hate that about English. Hindi doesn’t have that problem.’