The Contemporary Man Magazine june 2018

Again, you are not entitled to anything. But, that’s okay. Because once you accept
responsibility, you can go out and earn it, which is significantly more rewarding.
Spend More Time with Men, Not Boys
If you’re telling yourself, “I just don’t know how to step up as a man,” you need to stop
spending time with boys. Find a way to spend time with men. If you surround yourself
with people who don’t take accountability and responsibility for their life, I’d have you
consider that’s probably the way you’re going to turn out as well. You are going to be just
like that.
Now, on the other hand, if you find men to surround yourself with (co-workers,
colleagues, friends, parents, brothers, and people who are doing big things in their life),
that will inevitably wear off on you. You will strive to be more like those individuals.
If you strive to spend time with genuine men, you’re going to find people who lift you up,
motivate you, inspire you, and give you a kick in the pants that you need. You’re going
rise up to the challenge.
Don't look for the access path. Don't search for the path of least resistance. That's what
boys do. Men, however, know life is a challenge. They rise to that challenge because
they've realized the rewards and the benefits on the other side of that trial and obstacle
are well worth the effort.
Find Meaningful Purpose
It’s not enough to have trivial pursuits in your life. What’s driving you? What's motivating
you? How big and audacious are those goals? If you don't have goals or something
significant to pursue, it's likely you're not going to rise and become the man that you
were meant to be, and you're going to play at a level far less than you're capable of. If
nothing is pushing and pulling you, driving and motivating you, sit down and figure out
exactly what you want. You don't have to have this completely figured out, and it's likely
going to change over time so be patient with yourself.
I ask you, "What do you want," and you can't answer that question, there's a real
problem but, if I ask you, "What is it that you want out of life," and you can look me in the
eye and say, “this is exactly what I want. Here is the job I want to have. Here are the
experiences I want to pursue. Here are the changes I want to make,” you’re well on your
way to becoming a man.
Now, let's talk about the second component I wanted to address: us as father figures. It's
not just dads I'm talking about, but community leaders, mentors, business owners,
employers, etc. We have a responsibility to raise the next generation. We're going to ask
that they lead us at some point. We ought to make sure we're adequately preparing
them to drive.