JAVA Mar-2019

Fusion cuisine usually involves a mish-mash of cultures that follows the
movement of people with regional influences, like Cuban Chinese food
found on the East Coast. Sometimes it’s fun and trendy, like Mexican sushi.
Sometimes it’s a food analog, like vegan wings. Sometimes it’s strange and
inexplicable. Like French Paleo.
The paleo diet is jokingly referred to as the Caveman diet, with a focus on
meats and some veggies, eschewing things like dairy and grain – since our preagricultural
ancestors wouldn’t have had access to cheese and bread. So how
would that work for French food, where the focus is often on precisely that,
cheese and bread?
Quite well, actually. Sapiens Paleo Kitchen is a French restaurant, perched in far
North Scottsdale. For me, it’s a destination spot, since it’s easily a 40-minute
drive from my super central domicile. When I heard of its opening, I was more
intrigued than excited. I’ve been on Team Keto for quite a while. The keto diet is
essentially paleo with dairy, and they’ll take my dairy when they pry it from my
cold, dead fingers.
Located in a fancy, modern, albeit small strip mall, Sapiens seems like any nice
restaurant. There are about 16 tables inside. The interior is decorated in dark gray,
with appropriately smooth music playing, and it’s packed with families, couples,
and muscle-y CrossFit types. On my visit, it was a BYO situation, and most tables
were happily sipping away.
We started with coffee ($3.50), which comes with almond milk and a shot of MCT
for a $1 upcharge. MCT, or medium chain triglyceride, is essentially fractionated
coconut oil (coconut oil with a molecule removed to keep it from solidifying). It
does give a surge of energy, but it’s challenging to stir pure oil into coffee – it
needs the help of a blender. We make it work, but have to stir furiously lest the
first sip be nothing but coconut oil.
Our charming server engaged us immediately to find out why we were there.
It appears that all of the servers are on the paleo diet, as we heard similar
conversations repeat throughout the evening. Since I’m keto, she advised how we
could add cheese or butter to dishes. So we did.
It would be nearly criminal to skip Escargot ($15) at a French restaurant, so we
didn’t. A cast iron crock comes to the table with more than half a dozen snails,
with a king’s ransom of garlicky herb butter goodness. There are some paleo
bread slices (more on that later) served alongside for scooping, lest anything go
to waste. And it shouldn’t – this dish is quite fabulous, herbaceous, and garlicky
enough to ward away vampires. All conversation ceased while we dug into it, only
stopping long enough to gasp for air before it was gone.
I feel the same way about French Onion Soup ($9), partially because it’s my
favorite of all the soups, and because I make a mean one. So do they. And since
we’re fine with dairy, we had the Gruyère cheese added on top. I’ll own up to
being a tiny bit disappointed when it came out – I’m used to a bubbling mass of
cheese. What felt skimpy was actually about right – turns out if the broth and
onions are this delicious, the cheese isn’t as important. The salty, sultry, deeply
flavorful broth takes two days for them to make, and the hard work wasn’t lost
on us. The dollop of melty cheese gave a bit of textural interest. And flavor. Who
doesn’t love cheese?
Of course, when I saw the Paleo Bread Platter ($10), we had to order it. A
charming tray containing fresh French butter, artichoke dip, and tomato jam is
served along with several types of paleo “bread.” Only one could be classified
as bread, and it was closer to a toast point than a slice of French bread. The
consistency was a bit dry, as one would expect bread analogs to be, but it was
perfect for smearing butter and the other dips on top.
There were two other breads, but I would say they were more like crackers you’d
find at a fancy specialty store. And they worked for the tasty tomato jam – a savory
spread closer in taste to a bruschetta topping. The artichoke dip was great – warm,
savory hunks of chopped artichoke hearts surrounded by ghee, garlic, and onions,
paired perfectly with their fancy cracker-bread.
I adored the Duck Confit ($26), an engaging dish of duck cooked in duck fat until it
essentially falls apart. Here, it is as French and fabulous as you would hope, and
I only knew it was paleo because of the sides – a gratin of parsnip and roasted
seasonal veggies. Both were tasty and delicious.
Curious about Paleo Meatloaf ($18), I tried theirs. A solid hunk of grass-fed beef
arrives on the plate, surrounded by potato gratin and the aforementioned veggies.
It’s worth noting that none of their gratins have cream or cheese. They are cooked
with flavorful stock and coconut oil. Somehow, there is no coconut taste or smell,
and the dish still manages to taste as creamy as you would expect its French
counterpart to be, even without dairy. Their gratins are inscrutably delicious.
Since we’d taken the leap of faith to drive this far – and no one in our party had
ever tried it – we went all in for the Liver and Onions ($25). An impossibly large
serving of at least six slices of medium rare liver appeared before us, in a silky
sauce, surrounded by mounds of sautéed onions. We all looked at each other before
I went in first. It was great.
As our server explained, liver is one of the most healthful meats one can consume.
It’s full of minerals and nutrients. To be fair, some of my friends found it a bit too
mineral-y, but that is what liver tastes like. You can taste the pâté that is made out
of this, in a sense, in that the rich flavors are on the top of your tongue. If you eat
pâté, you should try liver and onions. And if you haven’t tried liver and onions – this
is the place to do it. The sherry sauce in this dish is plate-lickingly fabulous, and
let’s be frank – who doesn’t love sautéed onions?
As for dessert, every server recommended the same dish – Apple Crisp ($8). Warm,
soulful apples are sautéed in cinnamon, ghee, and spices, and served piping hot. At
the bottom of the dish was the crisp – noted on the menu as “crunchy topping.” It
was crunchy, and it was okay. I didn’t think it added much to the dish. I would have
happily enjoyed the warm sautéed apples on ice cream. I’m sure there is a Paleofriendly
version somewhere, and that would really make this a special dish. It’s
good; I would eat it again. But it could be great.
So is it possible to enjoy the fruits of a French paleo restaurant if you aren’t paleo?
Absolutely. Sapiens Paleo Kitchen is a sweet restaurant serving excellent French
classics.
Sapiens Paleo Kitchen
10411 E. McDowell Mountain Ranch Rd., Suite 120, Scottsdale
(480) 771-5123
Tuesday – Saturday 4 p.m. – 10 p.m.
Closed Sunday and Monday
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