CR5 Issue 169 June 2019

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BRADMORE GREEN & COULSDON LIBRARIES It’s free to join the library and nearly everything is free to borrow. Croydon Libraries are available 24/7:- We have a digital library of audio and e-books to download as well as digital magazines. https://www.croydon.gov.uk/leisure/libraries/online-library COULSDON LIBRARY FREE For Children Craftytime. Fridays 3.30-4.30pm. 4-7 year olds and their adults. Storytime. Saturdays 3-4pm. 4-7 year olds and their adults. LEGO sessions. 7-12 year olds use the fun and interactive LEGO Education programmes. These sessions are now FREE! Advanced booking required. Monday 3rd & 17th and Tuesday 11th and 25th. 4-5pm. FREE for Adults Alan Holbrow will give an illustrated talk entitled Tower Bridge: its design and build. Friday 7th June from 10.30-11.30am. Free but booking required. Adult reading group. 2nd Thursday of the month 2-3pm. The group will discuss Somewhere Towards The End (Non-Fiction) by Diana Athill. Thursday 13th June. Free one hour one-to-one IT help sessions on Mondays and Saturdays. 10am-11am and 11am-12pm. Please contact Coulsdon Library to book. Coulsdon Library at 167 Brighton Road, Coulsdon, CR5 2NH, Tel 020 3700 1007; coulsdonlibrary@croydon.gov.uk Opening Hours Monday 9am-6pm, Tuesday 9am-6pm, Thursday 9.30am-6pm, Friday 9am-7pm and Saturday 9am-5pm. BRADMORE GREEN LIBRARY FREE For Children Crafternoon. Tuesdays 3.15-4.15pm. 3-11 year olds and their adults. Storytime. Wednesdays 2.15-2.45pm. Under 5s and their adults. Rhymetime. Fridays 11-11.30am. Babies, toddlers and their adults. 7-12 year olds use the fun and interactive LEGO Education programmes, WeDo or StoryStarter. WeDo shows how to make models which can be programmed to move; creative stories can be inspired with StoryStarter. These sessions are now FREE! Advanced booking required. Every Monday 4-5pm. For Adults Bourne Society member Paul Sandford will give an illustrated talk entitled Researching Family and Local History on Monday 3rd June from 10.30-11.30am. Free but booking required. Monthly coffee morning. 1st Saturday of the month 10-11.30am. Free one hour one-to-one IT help sessions. Please contact Bradmore Green Library to book. There are jigsaws for loan at the library. Please ask staff for details. The library has a free car park. Bradmore Green Library, Bradmore Way, Coulsdon, CR5 1PE, Tel 020 3700 1003; bradmoregreenlibrary@croydon.gov.uk Opening Hours Monday 9.30am-6pm, Tuesday 9am-6pm, Wednesday 9am-6pm, Friday 9am-7pm and Saturday 9am-5pm. 84 Log into www.cr5.co.uk your local community website!
More Story than History There’s an old saying, ‘If you don’t learn from history then you’re doomed to repeat it’. Strangely, I don’t know the history of that statement. So I might say it again. Hmmm. Anyway, it’s aimed at telling people to learn from past errors. Like not looking up while standing on a hill near Hastings when the Normans start firing arrows at you, or calling your ship ‘unsinkable’ when you’ve got Leonardo de Caprio and Kate Winslet on board. But you’ve got to be wary where you get your history from. Even the most learned and academic of tomes can be open to accusations of bias. I’ve just finished reading a book called ‘Arnhem’ about the failed attempt to capture a number of Dutch bridges in the latter parts of World War II. It’s a great book, and I’d cheerfully recommend it to anyone with a interest in that direction, but for whatever reason, author Anthony Beevor clearly doesn’t like Field Marshal Bernard Montgomery, and can’t resist taking a pop at him at every opportunity. And it goes beyond simply holding him responsible for being the architect of the failed plan. So when you start looking at more dramatic representations, where the intent is primarily to entertain rather than educate, then you can be in real trouble if you take what you see as actual history. It’s not new. Shakespeare’s take on history was decidedly dodgy. Macbeth wasn’t a dagger-wielding psychopath, but an elected King (yep, they elected Kings in Scotland at that time, like they did in England until William the Conqueror turned up) who ruled wisely and well for a number of years. Richard III wasn’t the epitome of evil and he almost certainly didn’t have a hump-backed deformity. Both depictions were a result of needing to curry favour with Queen Elizabeth. But for serious, bona-fide, reality-warping historical depictions, you can rarely do better (or worse) than the movies. If you take Hollywood as your guide, from ancient pre-historic times to the modern day, then the world you see will be very different from reality. In ‘One Million Years BC’ (1966) a fur bikini-clad Raquel Welch screams in horror as her caveman boyfriend fights dinosaurs, despite the last dinosaur having died out over sixty million years previously. In the marketplaces of ‘Troy’ (2004) they trade Llamas from Peru, which no-one from Europe would be visiting for another two and half thousand years. Mongol tribesmen, Indian war-elephants and an armoured rhinoceros are brought together by the emperor Xerxes to take down the ludicrously over-oiled Spartans led by Gerard Butler in ‘300’ (2007). But Xerxes’ empire never extended to either India or Mongolia and no-one has ever armoured a rhino (well not until ‘Black Panther’ (2018), and that’s a comic-book movie and so doesn’t count) and lived. Let’s be honest, would you? Let’s catapult forward in time. Mel Gibson’s ‘The Patriot’ (2000). Set in a version of South Carolina where slavery really wasn’t that bad during the Wars of American Independence, the sadistic British commander (who else) rounds up the local crying women, doe-eyed children, invalids etc., sticks them in a church and burns it to the ground. An act of atrocity that would have had a profound impact on Anglo-American relations long after the war had finished. If it had ever happened, which it didn’t. Talking of which, and in a long line of ‘how the Americans won the war’ movies, we have ‘U-571’ (2000) in which Jon Bon Jovi helps his fellow sub-mariners to steal an Enigma code machine from a stricken German U-Boat. Set in 1942, it’s so inaccurate it almost defies listing. Other than the simple fact it didn’t happen, the British had already captured an Enigma machine back in February 1940 and deciphered the code by 1941, before the Americans had even entered the war. Sorry Jon, but you gave war movies a bad name… So, whether it’s ‘Mary Queen of Scots’, ‘Dunkirk’, ‘Darkest Hour’ or any of the recent historical films, or ‘Gentleman Jim’ or ‘Victoria’ on the television, take it as an entertainment. Even, if your curiosity is piqued, take it as an opportunity to look further into the subject or period. But never take it at face value… Paul M Ford Graydorian – The Writing Bureau To advertise call Lucy on 01737 557888 or 07703 209292 85
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CR5 Issue 169 June 2019

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