PNG Echo

Somewhere in POM
TO MASERATI
or not?
by RITA (THE RELUCTANT REVIEWER)
The reporter in her second-best jeans
want me to do what?”
I asked incredulously of ‘Er Upstairs – (otherwise known as
our esteemed editor whom I call that because we live in the
same apartment building and, in a context where ‘floor envy’
“You
is a real thing, she lives many floors above.)
She wanted me to review the ultra prestige car, the Maserati Quattroporte (the
name sounds posh but just means ‘four-door’ in Italian) for a magazine to be
published in Papua New Guinea.
I’m thinking, she’s finally taken leave of her senses, all the rarefied air up there
where she lives will do that to you. Nevertheless, I go ahead and state the bleeping
obvious:
“Papua New Guinea is a developing country, surely, there wouldn’t be a market
for them there?”
“That’s all you know,” she replied adding, “it’s why I’m the editor and you’re not.”
She’s got a point there, so I just gave in and just said “OK.”
But she wasn’t finished, oh no - on her way out she said, “…and before you start -
try Googling PNG and Maserati,” as if she needed to tell ME how to suck eggs.
So I did.
And speaking of sucking eggs, I don’t need to tell you lot about the 40 Maseratis
(and three Bentleys) airfreighted to PNG on specially commissioned 747 cargo jets
late last year to be used specifically for the APEC week, do I?
Neither do I have to remind you of the government’s assurance that they were
variously either “pre sold” or selling “like hotcakes” afterwards. Nor indeed to
inform you that, as I write, they are still on a wharf or in a warehouse in Port
Moresby, unused, gathering dust (save for two Maseratis and a Bentley that
have been sold and another Bentley that is now used as the Governor General’s
official car.)
Recently, the APEC Minister has told PNG that the reason they’ve remained
unsold is because the tender process only solicited a few ridiculously low offers
and after that people lost interest. (What happened to ‘pre-sold” and ‘hotcakes” I
wonder? Empty hyperbole?)
The intention of ‘Er Upstairs had now become apparent. She’s a troublemaker
that one.
I’m the fall guy. Oh well, there are worse jobs. Here goes.
PNG ECHO 5