Managing Family Life Booklet

CORONAVIRUS &
EATING DISORDERS
Managing Family Life

Hello
Families throughout the world
have been counting the costs of
Coronavirus and coming to terms
with its impact not only on health,
but on work, leisure, education, and
relationships.
For those families who are already
contending with an eating disorder, w
this anxious and unprecedented time is
undoubtedly made even worse.
This booklet has been devised to help
parents and carers navigate the pandemic,
offering useful tips, tactics and suggestions.
THESE PECULIAR TIMES AND
WHAT THEY MEAN TO YOUR LOVED ONE
As someone who already sees the relentless grip of an eating disorder
on someone you care for, you’re completely aware that the illness is
now doing its best to make matters worse – for them, and for you.
It’s worth reiterating some of the ways in which Covid-19 will
specifically be having an impact:
This includes:
Supermarket Shopping Anxiety
Reduced Exercise Opportunity
Limited Privacy in Home Settings
Disruption in Access to Safe Foods and Binge Foods
Increased Isolation
(removal from usual friendship networks in person)
Sudden Pause in Medical / Therapy Appointments
(or residential support)
Loss of Work or School Life Routine (and associated ‘purpose)
Financial Concerns

TAKE CARE OF YOU
While it might seem somewhat ‘at odds’ with your current preoccupation
around caring for your loved one, it’s vital you remember to look after your
own health and wellbeing as a priority.
At Wednesday’s Child, we talk a lot about ‘applying the oxygen mask’, and
by this we mean ensuring that you keep yourself well enough in order that
you can support the child, partner or parent in your world.
This would be important in any situation, but particularly when we’re in the
midst of a devastating pandemic which potentially puts you at risk too.
As a priority, make sure your daily undertakings include:
Washing
your hands
regularly and
maintaining
social
distancing
Getting
enough sleep
and rest to
allow yourself
to function at
your best
Having
some outside
time and /
or exercise
however
possible
Eating and
drinking
well to keep
up your
energy and
resilience
Communicate
– by technology
if necessary –
with those who
can support
your emotional
needs
Find activities
which can offer
a degree of
purpose, focus
or self-validation
(from learning
something new, to
listening to a podcast)
Allow yourself to
feel emotions,
and be forgiving
of yourself when
you struggle

DAILY LIFE
It’s fair to say that things feel far from normal right now, but the more
we can create a home-life where things are structured, and to some
degree, planned, the more we can all try to stay well.
Routines
Routines are helpful, particularly in
uncertain times. Discuss a potential
‘timetable’ to your day among
the family, and perhaps go as far
as to print this out for all to see.
Build in times for eating, self-care,
conversation, rest, movement and
mental stimulation.
Communication
Communication is always important with someone with an eating
disorder, but even more so now. Listen to your loved ones fears or
anxieties. Reflect back what you hear they are telling you, and ask
if you are correct in that comprehension. Work together on a small
step to conquer that fear.
Limit continuous ‘checking up’ dialogue, but instead, remind them
that you trust their decisions and are here to help them with the
steps which they find hardest.
Keep eating disorder talk to a
minimum. If your loved one feels
they must talk about their eating
disorder, consider a limited
window in which it is allowed to be
discussed.
For those of you not with your loved
one in person, use technology
to maintain regular contact and
keep questions and conversations
open and empathetic, rather than
demanding or insistent.

Conflict,
Conflict, sadly, is likely to be something of a potential within this
challenging time. Allow the opinions of all members of the family
– include siblings as they are often overlooked – to be aired and
understood. Encourage expression in a calmer manner. Ask children
in particular to draw pictures of how someone is making them feel.
Keep voices calm and give set windows for opinions to be expressed
(this should NOT take place at mealtimes).
Don’t try to FIX everything for everyone, but consider helpful phrases
and questions such as ‘I can understand you are struggling right
now….how do you think I can best help you?’.
Distraction
Distraction techniques are
likely to be your friend in the
household right now. Explore –
collaboratively – what crafts,
activities or projects might
be undertaken as a means
of keeping minds focused
in a productive way. Source
ideas online, task one another
with coming up with different
suggestions every week.

FOOD AND MEALTIMES
Shopping
Make family meal planning something which includes the family on
a weekly basis. Show understanding for your loved one with their
preferences, but suggest a tier of foods that feel safer through to
more ‘scary’, and suggest that this is a great time for you to support
them with trying other foods
If you’re in charge of shopping for foods which will be consumed by a
loved one, prepare a list, taking into account the likes and preferences
of your loved ones
Have it in mind that safe foods preferred your loved one may not be
available and that you might need to find others which passify
Consider asking friends if they can also look out for safe foods for your
loved one, if you struggle to get access to them
Prepare a list, but have alternatives written down too, just in case your
preferred item isn’t available
Have a friend or family member available for you to call if you begin to
feel anxious while shopping

Mealtimes and Eating Patterns
Try to keep to a routine of mealtimes
and snacks
Be aware of your loved ones desire to
‘compensate’ after eating and have
open conversations about what might
be better distraction approaches
Support your loved one with their
emotions around when and what
they eat. Be aware that their emotions
may be heightened in this challenging
situation
Seek the opportunity to ensure that the
family time of meal occasions can be
a positive one, of shared conversation
and discussion
Tread carefully about allowing your
loved one to ‘take control’ of cooking
and dictating what the family eats.
This is not the time to allow their eating
disorder to become the dictator of
family life. Some families feel it is best
to insist the loved on has no role in
the kitchen, while others find it helpful
to have set days where that person
is involved in cooking or suggests the
menu
Binging potential should be taken into
account during this difficult time. There
is no hard and fast rule, but some find
that you will need to lock certain foods
away, or limit access. Have an open
and honest conversation you’re your
loved one around what you all feel is
best
Remember that when it comes to
binging, this is often worsened by
making foods ‘off limits’. Restriction
inevitably leads to binging.

Keep the recovery journey of
your loved one on track during
this challenging time.

Consider the following
Any health concerns you have
for your loved one are genuinely
valid and will still be a priority for
healthcare professionals
Stay in contact with your child’s
treatment team, or encourage
your loved one to be in touch
with them
Where you are concerned,
reach out to the treatment team
or to a GP
Take advantage of a new daily
schedule within your family, to
encourage your loved one to build
in mindfulness and to encourage
a state of calm
Stay conscious of your loved one’s
unhelpful behaviours around
excess exercise or other binge and
purge activities, and instead, build
in distractions to prevent these
escalating
Keep in touch with, or engage with,
therapists or befrienders who you
feel will help your journey, and that
of your loved one. Use technology
where necessary.
Limit your loved one’s use of
social media if you feel it is being
detrimental and not aiding their
recovery.
Encourage your loved one to
embrace new hobbies or projects
to keep them feeling productive
and focused. This could be learning
to sew, creating a moodboard, or
finally filling a photo album with
favourite pictures.

Want someone
to talk to?
We welcome hearing
from you whenever you are
in need of support.
Call: 07974 359001 or 0800 844 5211
Email: hello@wednesdayschild.co.uk
www.wednesdayschild.co.uk