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ARIES (ma r c h 21-ap r i l 19): Physicist Stephen
Hawking believes it would be dangerous to get in
touch with extraterrestrial creatures. “If aliens visit
us,” he says, “the outcome would be much as when
Columbus landed in America, which didn’t turn
out well for the Native Americans.” Those who’ve studied the teeming
evidence for UFOs would say that Hawking’s warning is too late. Some
mysterious non-human intelligence has been here for a long time, and
the fact that we are still around proves they’re no Spanish conquistadors.
Aside from that, though, let’s marvel at the stupidity of Hawking’s lame
advice. As any mildly wise person knows, exploring the unknown is not
only an aid to our mental and spiritual health—it’s a prerequisite. That’ll
be especially true for you Aries in the coming weeks.
TAURUS (ap r i l 20-may 20): “At times, although
one is perfectly in the right, one’s legs tremble,”
wrote philosopher V.V. Rozanov. “At other times,
although one is completely in the wrong, birds sing
in one’s soul.” That may have been the case for you
last month, Taurus, but these days it’s the exact
reverse. If your knees are wobbly, you’re off-center,
missing the mark, or far from the heart of the matter.
If, on the other, birds are singing in your soul, it’s because you’re united
with the beautiful truth. There are a couple of caveats, though: The
beautiful truth won’t be simple and bright; it’ll be dense, convoluted, and
kaleidoscopic. And the birds’ songs will sound more like a philharmonic
orchestra pounding out Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony than a single flute
playing a quaint folk song.
GEMINI (may 21-ju n e 20): Are there any actors
who have impersonated as many different types of
characters as Gemini chameleon Johnny Depp? From
rogue agent to chocolatier, from psychotic barber to
astronaut, he is a model of inconsistency—a master of
not imitating himself. (to g l i m p s e 24 o f h i s va r i o u s
p e r s o n a s , g o h e r e : http://bit.ly/GeminiActor.) According to my reading of
the omens, you now have a poetic license to follow his lead. There have
been few times in the last two years when you’ve had this much freedom
and permission to be so multiple, mercurial, and mutant.
CANCER (ju n e 21-ju ly 22): A tattoo now adorns
the neck of pop star Rihanna. It says “rebelle fleur,”
which is a French phrase meaning “rebel flower.”
The grammar police protested her new body art.
They wished she would have rendered it correctly
—as “fleur rebelle”—since in French, adjectives are
supposed to follow, not precede, the nouns they refer
to. But I’m guessing Rihanna knew that. In reversing
the order, she was double-asserting her right to commit breezy acts of
insurrection. Let’s make “rebelle fleur” your keynote in the coming days,
Cancerian. Break taboos, buck tradition, and overthrow conventional
wisdom—always with blithe grace and jaunty charm.
46 | rollmagazine.com
december/2010
© Copyright 2010 Rob Brezsny
LEO (ju ly 23-au g . 22): Research by German
psychologists suggests that positive superstitions
may be helpful. Reporting in the journal Psychological
Science, they discovered that people who think they
are in possession of good luck charms outperform
people who don’t. “Superstition-induced confidence”
seems to act in ways akin to how placebos work to
heal sick people: It can provide a mysterious boost. (mo r e h e r e : tinyurl.
com/LuckCharm.) Just for the fun of it, Leo—and in accordance with the
astrological omens—put this finding to the test. Get yourself a magical
object that stimulates your power to achieve success.
VIRGO (au g . 23-se p t. 22): Psychologist Carl Jung
said that we are all connected to each other via the
collective unconscious. Your psyche and my psyche
have taproots that sink deep into the memories and
capacities of the entire human race. According to
my reading of the omens, your taproots are now
functioning more vigorously than they have in a long
time. You’re in more intimate contact than usual with the primal pool
of possibilities. And what good is that, you may ask? Well, it means you
have the power to draw on mojo that transcends your personal abilities.
Could you make use of some liquid lightning, ambrosial dreams, or
healing balm from the beginning of time?
LIBRA (se p t. 23-oc t. 22): If you want to get a gallon
of milk directly from the source, you have to squeeze
a cow’s udder over 300 times. I recommend you use
that as a metaphor for your task in the days to come.
It’s going to take a lot of squirts or tugs or tweaks
to get the totality of what you want. Be patient and
precise as you fill your cup little by little. There’s no way you can hurry
the process by skipping some steps.
SCORPIO (oc t. 23-no v . 21): “Blessed are the
meek, for they shall inherit the earth,” says the
Bible. That doesn’t mean what most people think
it does. The word translated as “meek” is the Greek
word praus, which in ancient times didn’t mean
“weak-willed, passive, mild.” Rather, it referred
to great power that was under rigorous control.
For example, soldiers’ warhorses were considered praus. They heeded
the commands of their riders, but were fierce warriors that fought with
tireless fervor. In this spirit, Scorpio, I’m predicting you’re about to get
very “meek”: offering your tremendous force of will and intelligence in
disciplined service to a noble cause. (Thanks to Merlin Hawk for the info I
used in this ’scope.)
SAGITTARIUS (no v . 22-de c. 21): Philosopher
Friedrich Nietzsche wrote a book called Ecce Homo:
How One Becomes What One Is. I’d love it if in the
next few weeks you would think a lot about how