Romulus 2018

Now that you live in the UK, do you feel like there
is a difference between how people act around
you? Would you say the UK is more accepting of
deaf people than Bangladesh, or is it the other
way around?
In Bangladesh, people tend to underestimate
deaf people more, unlike in the UK. Not
surprising, as there is no proper access or support
for deaf people to education, they often fall
behind in classes and have lower achievement.
This is really sad, because I do know that deaf
people can do anything, as long as society and
family allows them to, by providing the access
and support, but if they receive none of those,
it is much harder to progress. We have to
remember that most deaf children are born to
a hearing family: often they never have met a
deaf person before until their own deaf child
came along, and sadly the usual narrative is that
they don’t provide enough support to the child.
It does happen in UK as well to lesser extent
unless the child has very loving and supportive
family.
I have such supportive family who gave
everything to ensure that I get equal opportunity
in education, that is how I managed to have a
Bachelor and Master degrees and I used to work
in University of Oxford as a Research Scientist
on oncology for 3 years, and my research work
(co-authored) was published in 5 journals.
In Bangladesh, government and general public
don’t take much notice of deaf people, they don’t
provide subtitles on TV, and they don’t provide
interpreters, it’s as if we don’t exist. It was same
story in UK many decades back, but I am sure
things will change in Bangladesh in the future.
Having said this, the UK may be much better
than Bangladesh, but still has a long way to go.
In the UK, many of cinemas are not subtitled,
they usually screen a certain movie with subtitles
just once a week at an inconvenient time. If
it’s advertised that there will be subtitles, too
often deaf people arrive and find that there
are no subtitles. Many of services including
government’s branch offices don’t offer BSL
interpreters, even at request, and would say that
if I want BSL interpretation, I would need to
book it myself, and pay for it myself, which is
unbelievable, it’s like I am being punished for
just being deaf. Many times when I need to
make an appointment, it only offers phone
number for me to call, which I am unable to call.
I believe that the government should put more
money aside for equal access for deaf people,
and provide BSL interpreters, and increase the
number of BSL interpreters by encouraging
people to learn BSL by making the courses
much cheaper, and also introduce BSL courses
in schools as part of curriculum, like they do
with French and German languages already.
Also to provide online chats with staff on
website as an alternative for deaf people instead
of just a phone number which deaf people can’t
use.
BSL is even more of importance as it is a
language belonging to our own country instead
of a foreign country’s language, considering the
fact that there are 125,000 deaf adults in the
UK who use BSL, plus an estimated 20,000
children, and 9 million of people in UK face
hearing loss, which is 1 in 7.
Were you born deaf ? Do you remember the moment
you first realized you were deaf ?
I wasn’t born deaf. I was born 2 months premature
and acquired life threatening lungs infection as
my immunity system was not fully developed,
doctors gave me antibiotic drug which saved my
life, but the medicine caused profound deafness.
My family didn’t realise that I was profoundly
deaf till I was nearly 2 years old, because I wasn’t
responding to the noise behind me, and I spoke
very few words. Originally, they thought it was
just normal delay. I particularly didn’t take much
notice of it, until I was fitted with hearing aids
device! I struggled to understand what others
were saying to each other, especially among
my cousins, who were my playmates, I felt bit
isolated, that is the moment when I realised
that I am different from others.
How did you feel about being deaf ?
So many times that there was no access, no
subtitles at cinema, no interpreter at meetings or
at talks, and it is extremely hard in a big group of
people, there is limitation to lip-reading. That
is when I get frustrated, wishing that I wasn’t a
deaf person in first place. The isolation never
feels nice, especially when you just simply want
to know what is going on, and want to make
the connection and give input, but are unable to
do so. It is even more prominent when I am at
the outreach that I myself organise but am left
unable to communicate with public to explain
the purpose of the outreach.
And there are times that I completely forget
that I am deaf, especially when I am with my
immediate family and my partner, because we
all communicate so well because of familiarity.
It is usually a minimum of 3 people, any more
than that becomes a bit of struggle, and in bigger
groups, even more so. It is very dependent on
situations.
Do you feel like your surroundings treat you
different in a negative way? And how do you
think they treat you differently in a positive way?
When I don’t understand what is being said in
groups or if there is speech but there is no BSL
interpreter, and often there are no subtitles on
clips on social media, and so on, when I ask what
they are talking about, I get told “Never mind”,
“Will tell you later” which never happens.
When I am out walking on the street, hearing
people try to get my attention and I explain that
I’m deaf, they will say “Never mind” and then
walk away. This is annoying; they should take
time to explain what they were trying to say and
give me chance to response properly to best of
my ability.
I went on holiday with my friend outside the
UK, and she was meeting a friend of hers, we
all hanged out together for a while. Later I
found out that my friend’s friend remarked to
my friend’s brother that I am beautiful but very
rude and snobby because I kept ignoring his
communication with me, my friend’s brother
laughed and responded “Didn’t you realise that
she is deaf?! She didn’t ignore you on purpose”.
The guy was mortified when he realised his
mistake. There was many times that people
keep telling me “excuse me” behind me, and I
wouldn’t realise, because of that, lots of people
thought I was rude, I know this because I would
later caught sight of them uffing at me with
furious face expression when they managed to
walk around me. I am guessing it has happened
many times before that I was not aware of, that
I am mistaken as a very rude hearing person
who purposefully ignores any communication
attempt, which is not true, I just couldn’t hear
so won’t realise easily.
Another time, I was at the toilet in a train, and
was just washing my hands after toilet business
(luckily), when to my astonishment a ticketwoman
opened the toilet door with several
male passengers next to her, and she gave me
triumph smile as if she caught me like I’m a
criminal. She thought I didn’t have a ticket and
was hiding in the toilet.
When I told her that I am deaf, she was
mortified and was extra nice to me, as she was
afraid of being sued. She did knock and speak
through the door, but I couldn’t hear so couldn’t
respond. It was awful. It happened again in
plane recently, opened by male crew who talked
through the door, and I couldn’t hear. Luckily, I
was just sorting out my hair when it happened.
There is no privacy for deaf people. I feel like I
have to stick a paper outside the toilet door with
notice “Deaf person is inside, so can’t response
to verbal communication”!
What deaf people can’t do? They can’t hear.
That is all. The only big issue is that there
is a communication barrier, key word is:
communication. For hearing people reading
this, if you meet deaf person, please do take
time to repeat your words or rephrase if the
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