Siouxland Magazine - Volume 3 Issue 5

Siouxland Magazine | Balance /44
Ask The Therapist
By Gladys Smith
Question: My daughter was recently involved
in a serious car accident where one of her
friends was badly injured. We’ve always
been a close-knit family, but she’s been more
withdrawn, moody, and refuses to talk with us
about her feelings since the accident. What
can I do to help her get back to her old self?
Response: Thank you for your question. I’m glad
that you’re reaching out to help support your
daughter during this difficult time in her life, as
parental support and guidance are critical for her
healing process.
From what you’re describing, it sounds as if your
daughter may have been traumatized by the car
accident. A traumatic experience is an event in life
that causes a threat to one’s safety, and possibly
places that person’s life, or the lives of others, at risk.
As a result, a person will experience high levels of
distress emotionally, psychologically, and physically
that can temporarily disrupt their ability to function
in daily life. Adolescents will often be concerned
about the strong emotions they’re experiencing, but
due to the developmental stage they are in, they
will manage their distress differently than a child or
adult.
After experiencing a traumatic event, one’s body will
shift into a state of heightened arousal. It’s as if the
body turns on a series of internal alarms. When the
alarms go off, one is able to access a lot of energy in
a short amount of time to enhance one’s chance of
survival. In most instances, this heightened state of
arousal will last for a short period of time, or until the
threat subsides. One is usually very tired afterward,
as this state of arousal uses quite a bit of energy.
During the normal healing and recovery process,
the body is coming down from the heightened
state of arousal as the internal alarms turn off, the
high energy level subsides and the body returns
to a normal state of balance. This re-setting of the
body usually occurs within about one month after
the event.
Adolescence is a time when young people are in the
process of navigating their sense of independence.
However, after a traumatic experience, they will tend
to vacillate between independence and insecurity,
which can be somewhat perplexing for both them
and their parents.
As a parent, it’s important to know the common
reactions to trauma in adolescents in order to best
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support them. Although every young person is
different, the following reactions are what you may
see with your daughter:
• Increased alertness and responses to stimuli
• Avoidance of thinking or talking about the event,
or the inability to stop thinking and talking about it
• Recurrent, distressing flashbacks, thoughts, or
memories about the event
• Strong emotions such as sadness, anger, anxiety,
and guilt
• Overreacting to small things
• Changes in mood
• Physical complaints of headache or stomach aches
• Trouble sleeping or having nightmares
• Isolating and withdrawing from family and friends
• Depression and feelings of hopelessness
• Difficulty with short term memory, focusing, and
concentration
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Increased need for independence, yet feelings of
insecurity
• A drop in grades and overall school performance
It can be difficult to see your teen struggling, especially
if they choose not to talk with you about it. There are a
number of reasons this may be happening. They may
still be in shock and trying to deal with the reality of
what happened, in addition to being confused about
their thoughts and feelings. Again, it’s important
to remember that they don’t always know how to
identify their feelings, which in turn makes it difficult