respuestas published

Pictured: Anusha Entezari
“[An] overwhelming stress of feeling that I
have to prove myself.”
Anusha Entezari is a senior majoring in Dance and
Sociology. She identifies as being Mexican and
Iranian and has navigated these two identities for her
entire life, but even more during her time at UCLA. While she
never has experienced direct exclusion, she’s had experiences
where she’s been intimidated due to her background and not
knowing the social cues of her cultures. Neither of her parents taught
her Farsi or Spanish, or either of the cultural marks of their identities. This
frustrated Anusha throughout her upbringing because this put her in a difficult
position of constantly trying to learn about her identities. Coming to UCLA proved to be a
cultural shock for her, as she felt she didn’t belong culturally and/or socially. She saw others
who were more in touch with their identities and cultures, something she had to deal with. The search
for stronger ties to her community has led her to search for friends who share her culture. Wanting a mixture of
friends from both backgrounds, it has been difficult for her, as she doesn’t have as many Persian friends as she does
Latine friends. This gap in her friendships keeps her feeling distant from her Persian roots. While she hasn’t ever
felt like she doesn’t belong to one of her communities, it’s difficult for her not to feel excluded. She can’t go to
cultural events alone, as she gets overwhelmed, but she feels that she has grown overall. Constantly having to
explain her identity whenever she is asked has been a struggle for Anusha. Nonetheless, the evolution of loving and
growing with herself has been taking time to embrace features such as her curly hair. One experience she recounts
was when someone asked her in Mexico if she was Brazilian and she worried about her identity being questioned.
However, there’s been a catalyst. Dance. It has helped her connect with her cultures. Even with the struggles of not
fitting in looks-wise with those around her and culture shock, dance has helped her push through.
It has helped her remove those feelings of exclusion. She feels that this is one of the many experiences mixed-race
people go through, of not being enough of either identity. One case is when she did a dance in one of the cultural
shows she participated in with Afro-Latinx Connection (ALC). Being in ALC helped her feel more comfortable with
her background, and she looks back at the experience with fascination. Having those conversations about what it
means to “look Latine ‘’ help her have solidarity with the unrecognized Afro-Latine experience, and resonate with
feelings that she was not Latina enough.
Anusha hopes that the Latine community will become more aware of the existence of mixed-race Latines, and hopes
that a single mixed person never feels like a token person. She hopes that beyond acceptance, Latines build understanding
of their fellow peers. She envisions active measures, such as conversations, being taken to break down
harmful stereotypes, mentalities, and notions prevalent in the community. Ultimately, she hopes for a future where
all Latines feel accepted and that they can accept every aspect of their heritages. She hopes that no one ever has
to feel that they don’t belong and question their identities. That there’s better education, acceptance, and acknowledgement
in our community.
As many of us may know, navigating different experiences can be tiring. We can be grateful for our unique identities,
but they can also contribute to experiences that make us doubt ourselves. In my experience as a first-generation
Guatemalan, no one has ever questioned my identity as Latine, as I fit the “traditional” way of “looking” Latine, I
speak Spanish, and was raised in an environment where my culture was accepted and fostered by my family and
community. Through this lens, I came to realize that I need to look to the experiences of our peers to understand
their struggles. All of us need to listen to all of our peers. We have to accept not only those who are different from
us, but those who are also similar to us. So let’s listen for a bit, and hear what we as a community can do better.
23