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Ian and Kaye's run - Aston Martin Owners Club Victoria

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The Power of the Truth<br />

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerl<strong>and</strong> asked the Priest sitting<br />

beside her, “Father, may I ask a favour?”<br />

“Of course. What may I do for you?”<br />

“Well, I bought an expensive woman’s electronic hair dryer for my mother’s birthday<br />

that is unopened <strong>and</strong> well over the customs limits, <strong>and</strong> I’m afraid they’ll confiscate it.<br />

Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Under your robes<br />

perhaps?”<br />

I would love to help you dear, but I must warn you I will not lie.”<br />

With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.”<br />

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.<br />

The official asked, “Father, do you have anything to declare?”<br />

“From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.”<br />

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, “And what do you have to declare<br />

from your waist to the floor?”<br />

“I have a marvellous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is to date<br />

unused.”<br />

Roaring with laughter, the official said, “Go ahead, Father. Next!”<br />

A Lawyer Joke<br />

LAUGHS PER MINUTE<br />

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?<br />

WITNESS: No.<br />

ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?<br />

WITNESS: No.<br />

ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?<br />

WITNESS: No.<br />

ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the<br />

autopsy?<br />

WITNESS: No.<br />

ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?<br />

WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.<br />

ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?<br />

WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive <strong>and</strong> practicing law.<br />

RUNNING AMOC Winter 2011 18

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