classnews - Bowdoin College

I have talked to many women in the states and no one
really wants to talk about it. It’s the biggest secret and
nobody wants to talk about menopause for what it really
is. Or, they’ll talk about it when they get there. After you
get through perimenopause (which gives menopause a
bad name), the years after, during post-menopause, are
really good. And that’s the point, but it’s this medical
thing, and it’s the same thing for men, because men
go through male menopause. It’s this fear that you lose
your sexuality and you will become something less than
you are, but actually you become more than the sum
of your parts, and that’s a real opportunity. And nobody
was talking about that. It’s all based on science and if
you don’t listen to what your brain is telling you to do,
which is really scary, then you think 50 is ancient. My
mother and grandmother thought it was their right
to sit in a rocking chair and do nothing, but we know
now that’s not what successful aging is all about, and
we have a clear idea now what successful aging is. Our
generation needs to take that knowledge and use that and
set the example—like we did for equality in government,
equality in education—and take that activist mindset
and apply it to the second half of our life. Then we have
really given a gift to our children, to our grandchildren.
Actually, we are going to be the first generation to live to
four generations.
BOWDOIN: This year coming up is the 40 th
anniversary of women attending Bowdoin College,
which means that, when you came in the fall of ’73,
women will still very new here. It was the year of Billy
Jean King and Bobby Riggs, the battle of the sexes,
Roe v Wade was that year…What was it like to be on a
campus that was only twenty-five percent women when
you were a first-year student? Do you think it made you
into a different kind of woman?
SHAW RUDDOCK: It was amazing. No problem.
I think I was always quite tough. I always loved
competitive sports; I think I have a lot of testosterone
in me! Some women do and that’s why I ended up at
It’s this fear that you lose your
sexuality and you will become
something less than you are,
but actually you become more
than the sum of your parts,
and that’s a real opportunity.
26 BOWDOIN SUMMER 2011
Alex Brown, and I really loved that role. Nobody scared
me, and that’s a very male thing. Men don’t seem to get
scared, but women are much more fearful.
I loved it (at Bowdoin), and I was very happy. Also, for
me, coming from the background that I did, to be in an
environment like this, which is so beautiful, people are
so bright, so interesting. I really did view it as gender
neutral. I’ve never looked at men and women as being
different. Three of my best friends from here were men,
and there was never a sexual relationship, they were just
friends. They are still my best friends, and I’m godmother
to all their children. And, so, it was great and it didn’t
matter that there weren’t many women.
BOWDOIN: There are some women who say they felt
like they were in a fishbowl and that it was hard to be in
the minority, causing some to do things they might not
otherwise do.
SHAW RUDDOCK: I didn’t find that at all. I
absolutely loved my years here. I loved the men I met,
I loved the women I met (they are with me, still in
my life). I really think it’s important for women to
have close male friends, and I think Bowdoin gave me
that opportunity to build these lifelong relationships.
My godson is here now, and his father is one of my
best friends. He got married and had five ushers in his
wedding—I was eight months pregnant, and I was his
fifth usher. He had his four best male friends and me. I
could have been a bridesmaid, but it wouldn’t have been
appropriate, as I really needed to be on his side. Whatever
it was at Bowdoin at the time, I was willing to accept it
because I loved Bowdoin.
BOWDOIN: In your book, you talk about Freud,
about scientific research, and about popular culture. You
were a government major who went into advertising and
magazines and then moved into finance. You are not just
the poster child for the second half of your life; you are
the poster child for the liberal arts. Do you think your
education had anything to do with your approach to
writing this book?
SHAW RUDDOCK: I think Bowdoin had so much
to do with it. Bowdoin is an incredible environment. It
is a very safe environment to be able to explore all the
different parts of your self, and there’s no fear of failure
here; I think it’s really important that you can experiment
and not have that fear. The early years were so important
to me because I grew up in the inner city of Baltimore;
I went to a state school (my school was 95% black). My
elementary school was the first school to be integrated
in Baltimore in 1963. By the time I got to high school,