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Literary Journal Issue#5 2011 - Cranbrook School

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<strong>Literary</strong> <strong>Journal</strong> <strong>Issue#5</strong> <strong>2011</strong>


CRANBROOK SCHOOL <strong>Literary</strong> <strong>Journal</strong> <strong>Issue#5</strong> <strong>2011</strong><br />

Published by CRANBROOK SCHOOL<br />

Editor: Jacqueline Grassmayr<br />

Fifth Edition: <strong>2011</strong><br />

Designed and produced by <strong>Cranbrook</strong> Publications<br />

Front cover: ‘Prime’ – Painting by William Solomon Year 12


Contents<br />

Editorial ..................................................................... 1<br />

Poetry ........................................................................ 3<br />

Creative Writing ...................................................... 19<br />

<strong>Literary</strong> and Cultural Criticism ................................ 61<br />

Fine Arts .................................................................. 74<br />

Languages ............................................................... 82<br />

History ..................................................................... 95


BENCHMARK<br />

Editorial<br />

Welcome to the fifth edition of Benchmark which I hope will delight<br />

and engage you over the summer months.<br />

We were privileged this year to have poet Toby Fitch work with students<br />

as part of The Red Room Company’s education program, ‘Papercuts’. Toby<br />

Fitch is a talented new poet recently featured in the Sydney Morning Herald’s<br />

‘Spectrum’. His first full length book of poems is about to be published<br />

by Puncher and Wattman. The Red Room Company is a non-profit<br />

organisation that creates, promotes and publishes new Australian poetry in<br />

imaginative, inspiring and magical ways. For more information, view their<br />

website at redroomcompany.org. Some of the poems the students created<br />

for their anthology, attempted defiance, are published here. The boys have<br />

swaggered along the more rebellious laneways of their minds and left a trail<br />

of poetic musings in their wakes. I am sure that you will agree they are<br />

edgy and thought-provoking pieces.<br />

As always, I thank Tony Ronaldson for his wise editing advice. He and<br />

I spend many hours reading the poems selected by teachers, and are always<br />

delighted to see such a wide range of topics and poetic forms. Every year we<br />

are also highly impressed by the craft and skill of the competition winners.<br />

Thanks must also go to the English teachers who challenge, guide and<br />

inspire their students to write the pieces that appear in the Poetry, Creative<br />

Writing, and <strong>Literary</strong> and Cultural Criticism sections of the journal.<br />

This year, I have published two excerpts from the ‘Write-a-Book-In-a-Day’<br />

competition. As we go into publication, we await the announcement of<br />

1


EDITORIAL<br />

this year’s winners and wonder if we will match the successful entry from<br />

the 2010 Year 8 English Enrichment team. The boys must write, illustrate<br />

and publish a book within a twelve-hour time limit. The competition is<br />

a literary and fundraising initiative of the Katharine Susannah Prichard<br />

Writers Centre and Princess Margaret Hospital Foundation. This year<br />

the proceeds from NSW go to The Oncology Children’s Foundation<br />

(Westmead). For more information, you can view their website at<br />

writeabookinaday.com.<br />

Thanks also go to Anne Byrnes, Matthew Ross and Cathleen Jin for<br />

their selections in the History and Languages sections respectively.<br />

Thank you to the Art Department whose students are clearly motivated<br />

by the passion their teachers radiate. Their work is adventurous in content<br />

and professional in execution. Thank you to Rhondda Anthony, Chloe<br />

Hodgson and the members of the Publications Department for their tireless<br />

efforts in designing and producing such a beautiful journal. And, of course,<br />

thank you most of all to the boys for their contributions.<br />

This edition of Benchmark is dedicated to the memory of our dear<br />

colleague, David Ingham (1944 – <strong>2011</strong>) who gave the literary journal<br />

its title. Dave filled our lives with literary quips, poetic gems, laughter,<br />

generosity and warmth. He is greatly missed.<br />

Jacqueline Grassmayr<br />

Editor<br />

2


BENCHMARK<br />

3


POETRY<br />

Well Groomed<br />

Ba-ding! ‘Chris Jones,’ who the …<br />

‘Hey just moved here lol probs coming to your school next term.’<br />

Four hours and facebook chat really starts to grasp your social life.<br />

Pop up. Hannah just logged on. Must. Start. Convo. Reaching for the<br />

pack, eww Ready salted. Must. Get. Water.<br />

Ba-ding. Not the new kid again.<br />

‘You still there? … QUESTION MARK, QUESTION MARK.’<br />

Can’t take it any longer …<br />

‘Hi.’<br />

Initial greeting must be subtle with slight hostility,<br />

No Xs or Os for this one just yet. Ba-ding<br />

‘How old are you? Im 16. Just moved from the country.’<br />

OH GOD a country boy. Have to tell Jess about this one.<br />

I bet this is his first time on a computer let alone the Internet.<br />

‘Yeah same im 16. So how do you know what school I go to?’<br />

Good answer. Showing interest but still slightly respectful.<br />

Wait how did he know what school I went to …<br />

info page that’s it, of course. Had me worried for a bit then.<br />

Four days in, country boy won’t. Leave. Me. Alone.<br />

Kind of growing on me. Maybe its his innocence,<br />

his vague understanding of social networking …<br />

or just his plain willingness to persist.<br />

Either way convos keep getting deeper and deeper.<br />

Jess says he’s weird. Says I shouldn’t talk to him.<br />

SCREW HER. She’s just jealous. That’s right.<br />

Back stabber can go die for all I care.<br />

<strong>School</strong> started, boring as usual.<br />

Teacher mumbles, listen, straight out the other side.<br />

Time seems to slow down like walking through a retirement home.<br />

Talked to Jess. Didn’t go so well. In short …<br />

me angry. Clench fist. Bloody nose.<br />

But we made some ground.<br />

Preliminary social contact has to mean something right.<br />

No country boy today,<br />

Weird said he’d be here.<br />

Ba-ding. ‘Sorry I wasn’t there today, I was spewin. Feel better though.<br />

Wondering if you want to meet up?’<br />

Contemplation. To meet or not to meet, that is the question.<br />

Why not? Closest thing I have to a friend at the moment.<br />

A lonely wolf amidst a pack. Sad but true.<br />

‘Where and when?’ Ba-ding. ‘Steyne Park, four?’<br />

An out guy hmm whatever floats your boat.<br />

Tonight on Nine News.<br />

Reports just in that a sixteen-year-old girl was found dead<br />

in Sydney’s east.<br />

Oliver Spence<br />

Year 10<br />

Winner of the Year 10 Poetry Prize<br />

4


BENCHMARK<br />

Mighty Beowulf<br />

King of the Geats<br />

Damaged and dying, Grendel disappeared into the darkness.<br />

Unaware of the threat that remained, the Danes celebrated.<br />

Yet as night fell, they felt the fury of Grendel’s mother.<br />

She came in a rage to wreak revenge<br />

and before dawn, they found Aschere, dead on the floor.<br />

‘Time lost lamenting is time wasted. Let us avenge our friend!’<br />

screamed the furious tribe.<br />

Brave Beowulf led the way to the lake<br />

where deep below, Grendel’s mother lay in wait.<br />

‘Death or destruction, I will face my fate!’<br />

cried Beowulf as he leapt to the lake.<br />

He plummeted into the gloomy green depths.<br />

The icy cold water grabbed his breath away.<br />

Suddenly something tight grabbed his chest …<br />

Beowulf was dragged into an underwater cave.<br />

Gasping and gagging, he found himself face to face with<br />

a hideous hag, Grendel’s mother.<br />

The clash of steel and the striking of claws raced<br />

through the echoing chamber.<br />

With a silver flash of the sword, Grendel’s mother<br />

was slaughtered.<br />

Her bloodied head lay crimson on the dark floor.<br />

Beowulf turned to see Grendel in shock and<br />

With one sweep of the sword Grendel’s head rolled<br />

beside her mother’s.<br />

As Grendel’s blood bubbled to the surface of the lake,<br />

Beowulf’s companions gasped in horror.<br />

Suddenly out burst Beowulf with two heads held high.<br />

The companions raised the head up on spears and cheered<br />

Mighty Beowulf, King of the Geats!<br />

Roly Storch<br />

Year 7<br />

5<br />

In Grandpa’s<br />

House<br />

My eyes shoot open in the gloomy dark,<br />

Slowly adjusting to the light.<br />

I quietly slip out of the warmth of my bed,<br />

Suppressing the urge to shiver.<br />

My bare feet touch the ancient floorboards<br />

that creak and groan; ready to bend and break.<br />

As I stumble blindly to my bedside desk,<br />

grasp a beacon of hope and<br />

switch it on and smile,<br />

my trusty flashlight is dependable.<br />

I creep towards the towering obstacle,<br />

Trying to hide my fear.<br />

Turning the knob for all eternity …<br />

until finally the door swings open.<br />

this is the night, this is the night,<br />

in Grandpa’s house,<br />

I have waited for, all my life.<br />

Poking my head out into empty space,<br />

I check the coast is clear.<br />

My body doesn’t make a sound<br />

as I step out into the corridor.<br />

I raise my flashlight to my next destination;<br />

thin beams of light cut through darkness.<br />

As I tip-toe down polished floors<br />

my heart’s thumping loudly; adrenaline pumping.<br />

Stopping in front of my second obstacle<br />

I pause to catch my breath<br />

and breathe deeply, in and out.<br />

I press my ear against Grandpa’s door, feeling the icy cold.<br />

My heart skips a beat as I hear the rumbling of the old man’s snores<br />

which guarantees my success.<br />

This is the night, this is the night,<br />

in Grandpa’s house,<br />

I have waited for, all my life.<br />

I can barely contain my excitement right now,<br />

but I need to stay focused.<br />

The hardest part dawns and looms silently<br />

in the darkness ahead.<br />

I set out into the obscurity,<br />

guided only by my flashlight.<br />

I search and search and search in the dusty corridor<br />

but I can’t seem to find it.<br />

I can almost hear the laughing now


POETRY<br />

fading in the darkness.<br />

Suddenly, something touches me!<br />

I nearly faint on the spot.<br />

But yes, oh yes. I’ve found it!<br />

The dangling cord to the attic above.<br />

This is the night, this is the night,<br />

in Grandpa’s house,<br />

I have waited for, all my life.<br />

Tugging hard with all my strength,<br />

I conquer my last challenge.<br />

The stairs come down majestically,<br />

hitting the floor with only the softest of thumps.<br />

As I grasp the hand rails, my knuckles turn white.<br />

Torch in mouth and destiny in hand,<br />

I slowly ascend into the blackness above,<br />

still not believing this is happening.<br />

I pull myself up onto the attic’s floor,<br />

dust covering my body.<br />

On all fours, I turn around,<br />

and looking, I gasp,<br />

‘I see it, I see it! It’s really here …’<br />

The forbidden door of Grandpa’s attic.<br />

This is the night, this is the night,<br />

in Grandpa’s house,<br />

I have waited for, all my life.<br />

I stand up, full height and chest broad,<br />

to Grandpa’s forbidden door.<br />

It’s a good foot bigger than me.<br />

I tingle with excitement.<br />

I see the burnished brass knob<br />

reflecting in the torchlight<br />

and I can’t help but laugh.<br />

‘I’ve fooled Grandpa, I’ve fooled Grandpa,<br />

at last I’m finally here.’<br />

I step forward and swing the door ajar …<br />

The air is still, quiet as usual, as I shine my torch to the door.<br />

But the door remains black; no light gets through!<br />

As a great roar fills my ears and my feet are pulled off the ground,<br />

I’m sucked into oblivion, falling and falling and falling.<br />

This is the night, this is the night,<br />

in Grandpa’s house,<br />

I have waited for, all my life.<br />

I’m hurled back out of the attic’s door.<br />

My body is thrown across the room.<br />

I sit up, head spinning,<br />

dizzy beyond thought<br />

and I lurch to my feet, holding the wall,<br />

not thinking clearly.<br />

I’m still in Grandpa’s attic,<br />

just the way I left it.<br />

I’ve lost my torch, but I can see.<br />

Light comes from the window.<br />

I cast the blinds open<br />

and squint in the light …<br />

And the horror seeps in that I’m caged.<br />

This is the night, this is the night,<br />

in Grandpa’s house …<br />

I had waited for,<br />

All my life …<br />

Michael Turner<br />

Year 7<br />

Winner of the Year 7 Poetry Prize<br />

6


BENCHMARK<br />

Living History<br />

I’ve got an aunt in Narrabri,<br />

She’s 80, and half as tall as me.<br />

I like her so; she’s very nice.<br />

She asks me ‘round for scones and tea.<br />

She tells me stories of her life,<br />

Of places she has been,<br />

Of famous people she has met<br />

And things that she has seen.<br />

I think her memory’s faulty,<br />

As she’s getting on in years,<br />

And sometimes when she talks to me,<br />

Her eyes well up with tears.<br />

‘Lost my son in Vietnam,’<br />

She’ll say and shake her head.<br />

‘I won’t forget that pointless war,’<br />

Is all she ever said.<br />

‘My husband used to work the land,<br />

For farmers near and far,<br />

But his greatest love was at the pub,<br />

Propping up the bar.’<br />

‘His tombstone’s in the churchyard,<br />

Which I rarely ever see.<br />

I couldn’t care if it was gone,<br />

Makes no difference to me.’<br />

What a line – that said it all,<br />

The life that she has led,<br />

The tough times she’s endured,<br />

Shown in things she said.<br />

Sometimes we wander round the back,<br />

To a car parked in the drive.<br />

She strokes the hood and says to me<br />

‘It’s from 1965.’<br />

‘A Thunderbird from Ford,’ she’d say<br />

‘A gift when I turned 18,<br />

I used to drive it everywhere,<br />

It’s a wonderful machine.’<br />

‘I’d like to drive again, someday.’<br />

But I know she never will.<br />

The battery’s dead, the tyres are flat<br />

And weeds grow in the grill.<br />

7<br />

And each day when it’s time to go,<br />

She says, ‘What a lovely talk.’<br />

I nod my head, I say ‘goodbye’<br />

And out the door I walk.<br />

‘Come again tomorrow,<br />

I’ll tell you something new.’<br />

I nod my head and close the gate<br />

And call out, ‘Tootle-loo!’<br />

Sadly, as I leave the house,<br />

I think, ‘Does she even know my name?’<br />

Because I know the next time I come back<br />

She’ll repeat it all again.<br />

Scott Ewart<br />

Year 9<br />

Winner of the Year 9 Poetry Prize


POETRY<br />

Study Fishing<br />

You don’t want to, but you have to<br />

Your heart sinks to your stomach<br />

You look out the window<br />

The birds sing, the sun shines<br />

Every fibre screams to be outside<br />

You glance at the papers … Maths … Oh God …<br />

Like hacking your way through weeds<br />

An eternal punishment<br />

You become restless and tired<br />

TV wanders through your mind<br />

NO YOU HAVE TO CONCENTRATE!<br />

You switch on the TV, some daily cooking show<br />

You stare at the clock, beg it to stop<br />

Time lingers<br />

Guilt, stress, anger starts to flow<br />

And eat at your soul<br />

You grunt and wriggle, your face goes dry<br />

Your mind races, you tap your feet.<br />

Your blood boils. You gnaw your pen<br />

You’re on the verge of tears<br />

Until you just yell STOP!<br />

You stare at the ceiling<br />

Swivel in your chair<br />

Your fingertips skim the ground<br />

What should you do?<br />

What should you think?<br />

You’re stuck in quicksand<br />

Sucked into a black hole<br />

Powerless<br />

You rise and step outside<br />

The sunshine skips across your face<br />

The fresh air fills your lungs<br />

Cling on, life is larger<br />

Than some dumb test<br />

Oscar Whatmore<br />

Year 10<br />

The rain beats down upon the wooden roof.<br />

We prize open our eyes, crawl from warm beds.<br />

The dawn remains aloof.<br />

Numbed fingers sift through tangled lines.<br />

Lift sinkers and floats, pack lines and rods.<br />

Leave the dog to whine.<br />

Scuffling and shuffling down the loose slate hill,<br />

Carrying tackle, bent double against the wind.<br />

Hopeful despite the chill.<br />

The rain drizzles out and the boat comes into view.<br />

Rotting bait stinks. Exhaust fumes pervade.<br />

The dawn receives its cue.<br />

The cabin folds into the coastline, the boat judders forward.<br />

The clump of rocks in sight, we wash to a halt,<br />

Lowering our lines for reward.<br />

Steaming thermosed coffee drunk with trembling fingers.<br />

Sinkers strike murky water. The boat bobs.<br />

Fish aren’t caught by malingerers.<br />

The sun arcs overhead and still no fish are caught.<br />

Our cradle rocks. Our cradle rocks.<br />

Tempers are short.<br />

The cry goes up. Fish on! Fish on!<br />

The king has bitten. The king has fallen.<br />

Tension released. He’s gone.<br />

Angus Forth<br />

Year 11<br />

Winner of the Year 11 Poetry Prize<br />

8


BENCHMARK<br />

The Wharf Sand<br />

Bursting out the door,<br />

Sucking in delicious warm air and<br />

the smell of the cherry blossom tree.<br />

Laughing, we run down the granite stairs<br />

and look up at the bright beautiful blue sky.<br />

The slap of our thongs rhythmical as<br />

we pass the school, cross the road, run down the street.<br />

Finally we push open the black gate.<br />

I kick off my thongs and stand on the edge.<br />

I face my friends, they pressure me on,<br />

fear pumps adrenaline through my veins,<br />

the sparkling blue calls for me,<br />

my body is frozen.<br />

I can.<br />

Suddenly the ice melts,<br />

I jump, flipping backwards.<br />

I hover hollow in the air and stare at my friends.<br />

I am weightless,<br />

I float through the warm air<br />

and feel its gentle touch rushing up through my body.<br />

Splash!<br />

The water licks my legs,<br />

sucks in my body.<br />

Salt, the taste of summer<br />

I open my eyes. The colour of joy.<br />

The sun shines on the water like golden crystals.<br />

I float in the glistening light blue<br />

and let it wash away all my thoughts.<br />

Eamon Hugh<br />

Year 8<br />

Winner of the Year 8 Poetry Prize<br />

9<br />

Water lapped at the sand,<br />

swirling and churning,<br />

filling in foot prints,<br />

making the sand once again smooth and moist.<br />

The fat man sat on his deck chair humming to himself.<br />

The small tuft of hair left on his pink head danced and<br />

swayed in the warm wind.<br />

His nostrils flared and<br />

his toes dug deep into the sand.<br />

The wind brought the scent of ice-cream and hot dogs.<br />

Over by the rocks children chirped like sea gulls,<br />

running and hopping around a flamboyant van.<br />

Six small children sat grinning,<br />

slurping creamy white ice-creams as their parents fussed,<br />

rubbing sun block into their peeling backs.<br />

The fat man rolled over and chuckled as water licked his<br />

feet over and over again,<br />

washing off the sand.<br />

How he wished he was a grain of sand,<br />

twisting and turning at high tide,<br />

crispy and golden at low,<br />

stuck between the toes of children,<br />

constantly travelling and exploring,<br />

sitting back enjoying the ride.<br />

Harry MacGibbon<br />

Year 9


POETRY<br />

Traces<br />

Vestiges<br />

Left in sand<br />

Washed up by the sweeping tide<br />

Lie in little puddles, squelching by<br />

Wind echoes on the arid coast<br />

Silence is imprisoned by the broken sea<br />

Chained<br />

Battered<br />

Discarded in an assaulting swoop<br />

Shells, fluttering on the surface<br />

Driftwood bobs on the sea<br />

Little stories<br />

Of times gone by<br />

Shipwrecks, floods, waste<br />

Vestiges<br />

Left behind.<br />

Jack Holloway<br />

Year 11<br />

Eagles<br />

They soar through the light blue,<br />

Zooming around on strings<br />

Held by unseen puppet masters.<br />

As they swim through the inverted seas,<br />

A black streak thunders toward the glossy foliage<br />

And curves back up to its glossy flock.<br />

Caught in its rusted iron hands,<br />

An expensive meal,<br />

Found only in the most exclusive of diners.<br />

At its address,<br />

A young calls to the heavens.<br />

The echo shoots through the atmosphere<br />

Striking its mother in mid-flight.<br />

Down below the airborne crowd,<br />

The avians’ actions are mirrored by scaly fish,<br />

Who are born, raised and buried,<br />

In the dark blue veins of the Earth.<br />

Tom Roche<br />

Year 8<br />

10


BENCHMARK<br />

Boat on the<br />

Horizon<br />

There was a boat on the horizon<br />

Endeavour<br />

An outsider<br />

A people<br />

They glow a pearly white<br />

They’re constricted by blue and red<br />

They speak in loud licks<br />

Shrill as the cockatoo<br />

Smallpox and muskets<br />

Death and destruction<br />

Thousands of years<br />

Altered in minutes<br />

They pave the land drab<br />

They fence the land jigsaw<br />

They cross the land black<br />

Terra nullius<br />

We are the nation of plenty<br />

The land of sweeping plains<br />

A people of open arms<br />

A people of deep-found fear<br />

There is a war<br />

There is persecution<br />

We are the haves<br />

They are the have-nots<br />

Inferno in Arafura<br />

Overboard at Christmas<br />

The island nation<br />

Turns a blind eye<br />

22 million<br />

6 thousand<br />

It is our decision<br />

There is a boat on the horizon<br />

James Ross<br />

Year 10<br />

Winner of the C A Bell Memorial Prize for Poetry<br />

11<br />

Perfection<br />

Ski boots tap<br />

Gloves fit snug<br />

Goggles press tight<br />

Helmet straps on<br />

Eyes scan ahead<br />

Blood gushes through<br />

Breathe in … out … in … out …<br />

Ready<br />

1, 2, 3<br />

Dropping!<br />

Blood starts to rush<br />

Skis go wider<br />

Jump looms closer<br />

Off the edge<br />

Floating in time<br />

Weightless, fearless, invincible<br />

Descending with winged feet from the realm of the gods<br />

Perfection.<br />

Spencer O’Connor<br />

Year 7


POETRY<br />

The Meet<br />

Anticipation,<br />

fear and excitement build<br />

as you arrive at a park unknown on the outskirts.<br />

Jogging the course you assess your rivals<br />

and the terrain you will be covering.<br />

Time to stretch.<br />

Starting line-up is called.<br />

You walk calmly over<br />

trying to not show your fear.<br />

Silence.<br />

Then BANG!<br />

Nerves bounce as you sprint to the first turning.<br />

You push people out of the way,<br />

fight for balance.<br />

You take the lead.<br />

The last bend.<br />

Cheers sound drugged in the back of your head.<br />

All you hear is your breathing and your competitor’s<br />

breaths.<br />

You give a push;<br />

he pushes back even harder.<br />

50 metres to go.<br />

Give it all you can.<br />

Sprint.<br />

Your competitor falls further behind.<br />

Last 5 meters.<br />

Give it all you can.<br />

Lunge forward.<br />

Your body pushes through the red ribbon then<br />

slumps<br />

with breathing problems.<br />

You shake your competitor’s hand.<br />

‘Where … did … I … ?’<br />

You gasp for air<br />

and then you see the<br />

Shield … the CAS Cross Country Shield<br />

And you know … you know you have won.<br />

George Taylor<br />

Year 9<br />

A Noisy Escape<br />

Bang! Bang!<br />

The tent is erected.<br />

Chop! Chop!<br />

The axe is at work.<br />

Swoosh! Swoosh!<br />

The wind in the trees.<br />

Ripple! Ripple!<br />

The river is running.<br />

Chirp! Chirp!<br />

The birds are here.<br />

Bounce! Bounce!<br />

The kangas are out.<br />

Crackle! Crackle!<br />

The campfire’s burning.<br />

Scream! Scream!<br />

Marshmallows on fire.<br />

Crunch! Crunch!<br />

Someone’s gone for a pee.<br />

Rustle! Rustle!<br />

Who’s rolled over?<br />

Buzz! Buzz!<br />

The dreaded mosquitoes.<br />

Zzzzzzzzzz!<br />

Dad’s started snoring.<br />

At last in the dead of night.<br />

The sound of silence.<br />

Alex Sheen<br />

Year 9<br />

12


BENCHMARK<br />

Sachsenhausen Hymn to Apollo<br />

I see the bodies: carcasses<br />

heaped, dead, mountainous.<br />

arms and legs like sticks, rib cages protruding from chests<br />

straining to break the skin,<br />

desperate to escape the misery and terror of their owner.<br />

I too am a skeleton, a ghost of the man I once was.<br />

I’m trapped,<br />

encircled by the grey walls, grim guns and ghastly<br />

grinning guards.<br />

Only God can help me but<br />

what God?<br />

A God who has forsaken us,<br />

who lets his people perish.<br />

Satan has won<br />

Like zombies, we work, we sleep, we work, we sleep.<br />

We are rubbish, dumped<br />

to rot en masse.<br />

We are vermin,<br />

filthy and unwanted<br />

slaves.<br />

They make us stand in the freezing cold and<br />

watch us die.<br />

Hell’s destruction could not outdo the death camp’s<br />

horrors - nothing could.<br />

We approach the building,<br />

the one with the chimney<br />

from which no one returns.<br />

Mothers screaming, children crying.<br />

I surrender.<br />

Samuel Atkinson<br />

Year 8<br />

13<br />

You chase away the clouds with piercing gaze,<br />

And we below live by your constant light.<br />

You bring what warmth there is on dying days,<br />

Yet not the earth alone does you give sight.<br />

You gave us music with your golden lyre,<br />

And oracles predict the changing flow<br />

Of fate to kings and men; yet in your ire<br />

Send plagues, strike heroes down with quick strung bow.<br />

Without your presence we would dwell in dark,<br />

And live with baser instincts holding reign.<br />

Phoebus, hear this paean, shoot your spark,<br />

Your sacred arts someday we may attain.<br />

Chased by time, a brief and fleeting shade,<br />

Are we, who by your godly chords are swayed.<br />

George Polonski<br />

Year 11


POETRY<br />

The Painter<br />

At midnight, in my dreams behind my eyes<br />

in the last fragments of sunlight-staining<br />

like a broken cathedral window,<br />

the colours dance for me.<br />

When I was young,<br />

the deep blue, the corn-field yellow, the fiery red<br />

of a setting sun<br />

tore me from my business<br />

and bade me worship<br />

with my brush.<br />

To the right, scarlet singing<br />

from the canvas with a shriek of delight<br />

meets, from the left, yellow!<br />

Up and down:<br />

Tears from the rose, warmth<br />

from the moon, serenity.<br />

Turquoise, like a fog upon a winter’s afternoon,<br />

swirls, careens, tumbles like an acrobat.<br />

Every starry night:<br />

eternity in my eyes, on my tongue<br />

my very blood, my all.<br />

But the colours are cruel.<br />

They scream at me:<br />

in every daub, a shading out of place, a mutiny.<br />

You weak, sentimental little man!<br />

We’re crying when you should’ve made us bleed.<br />

You’ve ripped us when we should be still.<br />

Your heart, your soul, your will: dependent on your needs.<br />

We’ll make you beg and kneel for release.<br />

It is too strong a rebuke<br />

to plant the seeds of my destruction in meagre happiness.<br />

Too hard.<br />

I cannot but chastise myself with paint-flicked fingers<br />

and join the laughter of the villagers.<br />

There goes the mad, red-haired painter with a blinded muse,<br />

the lyrist of some one-stringed instrument that wails<br />

night and day with no relief,<br />

critiquing himself with his one torn ear.<br />

I can feel the moment when the colours speak<br />

and ecstasy fills me once again.<br />

It fills me with the raucous laughter of crows,<br />

behind their beaks a promise of grace<br />

I cannot touch or see.<br />

My soul the palette, my madness paint.<br />

Joss Deane<br />

Year 11<br />

14


BENCHMARK<br />

Pfft, Poetry:<br />

Who Needs It?<br />

I’ve never quite gotten the hang of poetry.<br />

It has never really clicked.<br />

Below are just a couple of phrases<br />

Of bad examples I have picked.<br />

Awful attempts at alliteration<br />

Are all I can achieve.<br />

And despite desperate degrees of effort<br />

My assonance is still naive.<br />

My similes don’t come to a point,<br />

They’re as nonsensical as Swedish rye bread.<br />

And as for my personification,<br />

Why, the words have simply fled.<br />

Oh the difficulty with rhyming words<br />

They never seem just right.<br />

As can be seen by my last sentence,<br />

Which doesn’t even rhyme.<br />

Edward Clarke<br />

Year 10<br />

15


POETRY<br />

The following poems were created by Year 10 Enrichment students as part of the Red Room Company’s<br />

education program, ‘Paper Cuts’. They appear in the anthology attempted defiance edited by Toby Fitch.<br />

Fly the Coop Like the Hyena<br />

Slightest breeze ruffles his hair<br />

Sandstone cracks and crumbles below foot<br />

The sun crisps his skin<br />

His wings unfold<br />

Green, grey, blue<br />

The colours of Sydney envelop him<br />

Shuffling over edge<br />

He flies the coop<br />

A moment of pure stillness<br />

He is not land<br />

Not water<br />

But it rushes through him<br />

The world accelerating<br />

Gale plasters his face<br />

Chaos reigns free<br />

Brace for impact<br />

James Ross<br />

Year 10<br />

Winner of the C A Bell Memorial Prize for Poetry<br />

He traverses suburbia<br />

Claws wrapping spray-can<br />

He slinks the fence<br />

Glances the corner<br />

Taxi coasts by like a shark<br />

He dives to ground<br />

Punches ink to Coke ad<br />

Paint oozes, blood from a gazelle<br />

Launches and scoots<br />

Success running through his veins<br />

Wild smile torn across his face<br />

Like a hyena<br />

James Ross<br />

Year 10<br />

Winner of the C A Bell Memorial Prize for Poetry<br />

16


BENCHMARK<br />

Secret Scenes<br />

There’s a picture of Justin Bieber<br />

In my drawer, on my desk, above my bed.<br />

I have all his tracks,<br />

But I pretend I hate him when<br />

My friends talk about him.<br />

***<br />

Mr Fitch asks for my homework,<br />

I tell him I handed it in<br />

Even though I forgot I even had<br />

That assignment.<br />

I convince him that he lost it.<br />

***<br />

Mum glares at me, who<br />

Took the Jack Daniels?<br />

Sweat rolls off my forehead,<br />

My legs turn to clouds<br />

I also took the cookies.<br />

***<br />

Chasing Sarah down the alleyway,<br />

Smiles break across my face,<br />

Another girl playing<br />

Hard to get.<br />

I double my efforts.<br />

***<br />

Virtual eyes follow me,<br />

The door invites me in, and I oblige,<br />

Demolishing the toilets:<br />

Bang! Bang! Bang! Walk out<br />

As if nothing happened.<br />

Jonathon Li<br />

Year 10<br />

17<br />

? Do<br />

others wonder what I think?<br />

Does an ember think about the ash?<br />

Do the waters stare at the sky, feel empty<br />

if the stars don’t show?<br />

Where will the pebble reach the bottom of the lake?<br />

Are green clouds jealous of rainfall?<br />

Do shadows always follow?<br />

What is it like to be the shiny shell in the sand?<br />

Does time have colour?<br />

Is there a reason to ask in the first place?<br />

Jack Rathie<br />

Year 10


POETRY<br />

A Rebel<br />

From the moment I wake to the second I sleep<br />

I’m suffocated by rules and caged behind the law<br />

Engulfed by the commands of others<br />

But not today no I’m taking a strike and taking a stand<br />

Saying no to being quiet in the library<br />

I’ll talk when I want and as loud as I want and you can’t<br />

reproach me<br />

Refuse to write out the question before the answer<br />

And reject washing and scrubbing what menial chores!<br />

What do I care if mould colonises the sink<br />

If we run out of plates and revert to our hands<br />

Who says I don’t know what’s best<br />

Who says that food is expired because of a date on a can<br />

These imprudent rules grip you suckers<br />

Model citizens of good hygiene upholding your cherished law<br />

You can lecture me day and night like a wretched machine<br />

But deep down I know you’re as dirty as me<br />

Finn Hugh<br />

Year 10<br />

The Frozen<br />

Moment<br />

It’s when we’ve gone under<br />

When we’re all tucked in and cosy<br />

When we lie in bed content and dreamless<br />

When the static of the day has faded<br />

Shielded from the frozen moment<br />

It’s then that he walks the streets<br />

That he confides in the moon and stars<br />

Fighting his unending war<br />

Through valleys of darkness<br />

And he wonders where the plunge began<br />

Mackenzie Baran<br />

Year 10<br />

18


BENCHMARK<br />

19


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

Write-a-Book-in-a-Day<br />

An excerpt from<br />

Terror Amongst the Trees<br />

Chapter One<br />

A cacophony of drills and machinery saturated the air<br />

around Joe. However, he was oblivious to the sounds<br />

around him, his mind singularly focused on the timber in<br />

front of him. With experienced care, he pressed the drill<br />

in again, creating whirlwinds of frayed wood with the<br />

powerful machine.<br />

Absorbed in this task, he barely noticed when his mobile<br />

phone began to ring. The vibrations, however, snapped<br />

him out of his trance. As he reached for it, his hand<br />

slipped and the drill tumbled out of his hand. As it fell,<br />

it carved out a deep channel into the timber.<br />

‘Bollocks!’ Joe shouted. He lunged for the drill as the<br />

phone bounced out of his hands and catapulted into the<br />

air. He snatched the drill out of its plunge before it could<br />

do any harm. His phone, however, did not receive the<br />

same treatment. It hit the ground and shattered into<br />

hundreds of pieces. The ringing died out. ‘Bugger!’<br />

He cursed and swept up the broken pieces with his boot.<br />

Behind him, he could feel eyes turning towards him. He<br />

tried to cover up the mess even though it was now too late.<br />

‘Mr Landers,’ a voice said behind him. He turned<br />

disgracefully around to meet his boss’ eyes. ‘My office.<br />

Now.’ Like a lamb to the slaughter, Joe did as he was told.<br />

The office was cool compared to the sweltering heat<br />

outside, the boss sat down and motioned for Joe to<br />

do likewise.<br />

‘It has come to my attention that you have been, shall we<br />

say, a little clumsy. This is not the first time but has been<br />

repeated several times over the last week. I do not want to<br />

have to make this decision, but I’m afraid that I have no<br />

choice. I would like you to look for another job,’ the boss<br />

stated. Joe was taken aback. He couldn’t believe what he<br />

was hearing.<br />

‘But I’m your best worker. I’ve been working for you for<br />

over two years now. You can’t just fire me!’<br />

‘I’m afraid we can, and we must. You have been very<br />

careless lately and have often jeopardised the project.<br />

We feel that it is time for you to move on. Our decision<br />

is final.’<br />

Broken, Joe left the office. A cloud of despair billowed<br />

behind him and followed him all the way to his<br />

apartment. It was a mess; clothes were strewn all over<br />

the floor and his bed. The only surface, a small table in<br />

the centre of the room, was littered with half-eaten food.<br />

The television was on full blast, even though Joe wasn’t<br />

watching it. The sink was leaking and dirty dishes were<br />

piled up in the sink. Solemnly, he stepped over the<br />

disgusting mess and took a can of beer from the fridge.<br />

Taking a sip, he pushed a week-old singlet off the chair<br />

and sat down in front of his computer. Joe sighed,<br />

wondering where to start. Jobs were scarce these days and<br />

he knew what trials were ahead of him to secure another<br />

occupation. Soberly, he opened up the web browser and<br />

began searching.<br />

***<br />

Three days later, after several hours searching the Internet,<br />

he heard his home phone ring.<br />

‘Joe Landers here.’<br />

‘Gerald Fitzroy. I have been looking for a builder of<br />

your qualifications for some time. There is a particular<br />

assignment I believe would be right up your alley. My<br />

aunt Elizabeth currently lives in a house of poor living<br />

standards outside Nettletown, in the Bullwinkel Woods.<br />

I need a well-experienced builder to renovate her home<br />

to a more safe design. I hope that you will be able to<br />

complete this project.’<br />

‘Why, um, yes. Certainly!’ Joe was astounded. A job offer,<br />

finally! He was ecstatic!<br />

‘I’ll email you the address now. I shall contact you later<br />

this week to sort out any complications.’<br />

Then the call ended. Joe placed down the phone, still<br />

dazed by the brilliant situation. He picked up the phone<br />

again to tell his friends of the good news.<br />

***<br />

The old house creaked and moaned against the relentless<br />

wind. Inside, however, the room was dimly lit by an open<br />

fireplace. Two figures sat opposite each other on well-worn<br />

armchairs. Eventually, one of them broke the silence.<br />

20


BENCHMARK<br />

Write-a-Book-in-a-Day<br />

An excerpt from<br />

Terror Amongst the Trees continued<br />

‘Aunty, you really cannot continue to live here. The walls<br />

are old and weathered and the floorboards have become a<br />

safety hazard,’ Gerald insisted.<br />

‘Nonsense, dear, I’m perfectly happy here and have no<br />

intention of moving,’ Elizabeth responded, ‘Besides, your<br />

uncle and I have lived here for many years now, longer<br />

than you’ve been alive, and nothing has ever happened<br />

to us in that time.’<br />

‘Albert has been dead for 15 years now.’<br />

‘He still lives here, you know. He keeps me company<br />

sometimes.’<br />

There was a long silence. Nothing could be heard except<br />

for the crackle of the fireplace. Shadows shimmered in<br />

and out of focus on the peeling walls. Outside, the<br />

gnarled branches of a tree scratched against the frosted<br />

glass of the window pane. A wolf howled in the distance.<br />

The low buzz of cicadas enveloped the quiet room. Finally,<br />

after much contemplation, the nephew spoke.<br />

‘We need to renovate this house. Perhaps some concrete<br />

beams could secure the roof …’<br />

‘Fiddlesticks! You simply don’t understand. This house<br />

means more to me than it does to you or that silly wife<br />

of yours. Modern replacements would wreck this<br />

wonderful home.’<br />

‘I’m afraid the matter has already been settled. I’ve<br />

contacted a bricklayer to strengthen your foundations.’<br />

‘That’s preposterous, dear! I simply won’t allow it. These<br />

modern bricks will wreck the atmosphere of this place.’<br />

‘I shall hear no more of the subject. Like I said, a bricklayer<br />

has been contacted and should arrive later this week. I do<br />

hope that you’ll be accommodating; he may need to stay<br />

the night.’<br />

21<br />

The young man got up to leave, then turned around.<br />

‘Of course any time you would consider moving to a<br />

retirement village I would be only too happy to help.’<br />

Then he left, leaving Elizabeth bewildered.<br />

Hal Crichton-Standish, Blake Bullwinkel, Laurence Nettleton,<br />

Jack Mowbray, Christopher Christian, Joseph Rossi<br />

Year 8 Team – Mentos in Coke


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

Write-a-Book-in-a-Day<br />

An excerpt from<br />

The Lecture<br />

‘That’s all for today. Tomorrow we’ll go over prevention<br />

of tooth decay and gum disease,’ the professor announced,<br />

adjusting his glasses upon his nose. The room let out a<br />

collective sigh of relief after a two-hour lecture.<br />

Sarah’s hand was sore from intense note taking. It wasn’t<br />

that Sarah didn’t enjoy her dentistry course; in fact she<br />

was really passionate about her studies, but hours upon<br />

hours of studying plaque had taken its toll. She was also<br />

unbelievably hungry. Her stomach was groaning and<br />

growling, pleading for food.<br />

After packing her books and returning her glasses to their<br />

case, she left the lecture hall. An animated group of girls,<br />

whom she had met a few days earlier, asked her if she<br />

wanted to grab a drink after the lecture. However she was<br />

too tired, and rejected the offer. She preferred to spend<br />

some nights alone and returned to her college room.<br />

A strong wind was building and Sarah swept the brown<br />

hair from her face. She held her books to her chest,<br />

providing warmth and a wind barrier. Her tired eyes had<br />

lost their usual blue glow, and had sunk into her head.<br />

Small red pimples had found a home on her forehead and<br />

cheeks. Late nights and little sleep were evident in her<br />

physical features.<br />

As she made her way across the university grounds, she<br />

noticed a threatening dark cloud on the horizon. It<br />

seemed to be growing in the sky as she approached the<br />

quadrangle. As she drew nearer to the quad, she noticed<br />

all the usual university activities in full flight. There were<br />

a few guys kicking a hacky sack, an alternative-looking<br />

guy playing the bongos and some couples holding hands<br />

and lovingly staring into each other’s eyes. This typical<br />

university behaviour was to be expected. What was<br />

unusual about the scene was the fact that a peculiar<br />

individual was standing on a bench, as if giving a sermon<br />

to an invisible crowd.<br />

‘I am Father Charles McGregor and I speak to you! The<br />

rapture is imminent! I have seen the way and the way is<br />

with me! Tomorrow a greater power will descend on us!<br />

Join and you will be saved! Follow the Way and you will<br />

be forgiven! Follow the Way and you will be saved from<br />

the impending doom!’<br />

He dressed top to toe in a creaseless white garment. A<br />

rugged beard flowed from his chin. He was the spitting<br />

image of one’s depiction of God. His voice echoed in the<br />

compounds of the quadrangle. A pile of leaflets stood at<br />

his feet. He was handing them out to passers-by who took<br />

one look before discarding them into the nearest bin.<br />

At first Sarah was taken aback by the unusual presence of<br />

this man. Of course, this was not an everyday occurrence<br />

in the university. Despite this, crazy people did crop up on<br />

the campus from time to time, so anything this guy said<br />

should only be taken lightly. Sarah dismissed the preacher<br />

and continued back to her dorm.<br />

***<br />

After showering, Sarah made her way to the empty dining<br />

hall to satisfy her hunger. She was too hungry to care<br />

about the quality of the meal. For the third time this week,<br />

the college chefs had prepared a hearty beef stroganoff for<br />

dinner. She took a plate of the brown mess with rice and<br />

didn’t bother to question where it came from. After a<br />

quick glance around the hall Sarah couldn’t find any of<br />

her friends, so she decided to retreat to her own room.<br />

She didn’t feel like being social anyway.<br />

The journey back to her dorm took her through the<br />

courtyard. From there she could see the dark cloud<br />

brewing, nullifying the sun and casting a foreboding<br />

shadow on the university buildings.<br />

Sarah let herself into her room and collapsed on her small<br />

bed and turned on her miniature television set. She flicked<br />

through the channels and upon finding nothing even<br />

slightly entertaining, settled for the local news broadcast.<br />

The anchors presented the mundane evening news,<br />

starting with a road accident that caused a major traffic<br />

backlog. He then continued on to sport, business and<br />

finally weather. Sarah was drifting off now, catching<br />

fragments of the report as the need for sleep began to<br />

overcome her.<br />

‘Strong wind … Dangerous storm … Unpredictable<br />

conditions are to be expected ...’<br />

That was the last she heard before she was enveloped by a<br />

dream filled sleep.<br />

Mackenzie Baran, Jonathan Li, Jack Rathie, Lewis Cooksley,<br />

Anthony McDougall<br />

Year 10 Team – Dragon Warriors 2<br />

22


BENCHMARK<br />

Jarrah<br />

In a European-dominated school in outback Australia, an<br />

aboriginal boy takes refuge behind a water tank. Regularly<br />

persecuted because of his race, he increasingly retreats into his<br />

own imaginary world. A chance encounter with another boy,<br />

bullied because of his religion, sparks the most unlikely<br />

friendship.<br />

47 Ext – watertank – day<br />

Jarrah runs into shot. We hear boys shouting in the<br />

distance. As the voices fade Jarrah wipes a tear from his<br />

eye. He leans with his back against the water tank and<br />

dejectedly slides down the side of the tank onto the<br />

ground. He wraps his arms around himself and rocks<br />

back and forth. Beads of sweat trickle down his face as<br />

he remembers the previous events.<br />

CALLUM: He doesn’t belong here …<br />

GEORGE: Can’t even speak properly …<br />

HENRY: Should’ve stayed in the bush.<br />

We hear the ticking of a clock to symbolise time passing.<br />

Voices can be heard outside.<br />

TEACHER: Where is he? You say he ran past the<br />

classrooms, then where?<br />

CALLUM: Who cares, he’s a stupid loser anyway.<br />

TEACHER: Don’t say that!<br />

CALLUM: You know it’s true!<br />

TEACHER: The principal won’t be happy. If I catch<br />

that boy …<br />

CALLUM: He doesn’t belong here, why can’t we get<br />

rid of him?<br />

TEACHER: Just get to class!<br />

We hear the sound of footsteps and the voices dissipate<br />

into the distance. Jarrah curls up into a ball. We hear the<br />

clock again, getting louder and louder …<br />

48 Int – foster home kitchen – evening<br />

Pan across to Marian cooking in the kitchen. She is<br />

a European woman in her fifties with graying hair. The<br />

kitchen is small and under-furnished, but it has a warm<br />

23<br />

feel about it. The door opens in the background and<br />

Jarrah enters with his school bag slung over one shoulder.<br />

Marian puts her cooking pot down and turns to Jarrah<br />

with her hands on her hips.<br />

MARIAN: Well?<br />

JARRAH: Well what?<br />

MARIAN: How was your first day of high school?<br />

JARRAH: Okay. I guess.<br />

He dumps his bag at the front door and is about to head<br />

up the stairs.<br />

MARIAN: Now what have I told you about property<br />

dear?<br />

Jarrah picks up his bag and places it down gently. He then<br />

races up the stairs. Marian shakes her head.<br />

MARIAN: Oh Jarrah. What am I going to do with you?<br />

But she’s smiling to herself.<br />

49 Int – foster home dining room – night<br />

Eight other children around Jarrah’s age sit with him at<br />

the table. Marian takes the seat at the head of the table.<br />

MARIAN: I have some news for you all. I am getting a bit<br />

old for all this volunteer work and have decided to leave<br />

you in the capable hands of Miss Kensington.<br />

DARREL: But you can’t leave! You’ve been here eleven<br />

years!<br />

MARIAN: I know dear, and it’s been lovely looking after<br />

you all. But I can’t look after you forever.<br />

DARREL (Muttering): I bet she’s a witch.<br />

50 Ext – schoolyard – day<br />

Jarrah walks through the school gate. As soon as he enters<br />

the school, five boys come out of the shadows. One of<br />

them is Callum. Callum is a small boy with fiery red hair<br />

and a quick temper. Jarrah tries to ignore them.<br />

CALLUM: So you’ve come back again?<br />

JARRAH: Leave me alone.


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

CALLUM: You shouldn’t be here. This is our school. We<br />

don’t take boys from the foster home.<br />

EDWARD: You’re so pathetic even Marian is leaving the<br />

foster home. She’s gotten sick of you.<br />

JARRAH: Why can’t you just drop it?<br />

CALLUM: Didn’t you hear me, idiot? We don’t take your<br />

type in here. This is our school. It was the same with your<br />

parents, wasn’t it?<br />

Jarrah stops dead in his tracks. Callum senses that he’s<br />

hit home.<br />

CALLUM: They couldn’t keep themselves out of other<br />

people’s business. No wonder they were bludgeoned; they<br />

shouldn’t have come to our church.<br />

Jarrah slowly turns around and faces Callum, clenching<br />

his fists. Callum’s friends encircle the two and a chant<br />

begins. Jarrah runs at Callum and punches him in the gut.<br />

Callum is winded.<br />

CALLUM: Stupid … abo …<br />

HENRY: Get him!<br />

The four boys close in on Jarrah, but he slips through<br />

their closing net. He runs behind the classroom block and<br />

his pursuers lose his trail. He races behind the water tank<br />

without being seen.<br />

51 Ext – watertank – day<br />

Safe behind the water tank, Jarrah begins to cry. Silently,<br />

his small body shakes uncontrollably. Callum’s voice<br />

echoes in his head.<br />

CALLUM: … They couldn’t keep themselves out of other<br />

people’s business … … they shouldn’t have come to our<br />

church …<br />

Close up on Jarrah’s eyes, smudged with tears.<br />

FLASHBACK SCENE: Jarrah’s parents laughing,<br />

holding hands.<br />

FLASHBACK: Jarrah going on picnics with his parents.<br />

FLASHBACK: Waving, as they went off to church that<br />

fateful Sunday.<br />

FLASHBACK: Television headlines the day after they died.<br />

NEWSREADER: An aboriginal family was bludgeoned<br />

to death with a crowbar due to a fierce argument …<br />

Jarrah slips into a state of semi-consciousness.<br />

Fade to an image of a bloodied crowbar on the pavement …<br />

Hal Crichton-Standish<br />

Year 8<br />

24


BENCHMARK<br />

The Watcher<br />

All there was, all there had ever been, was the window.<br />

The dripping concrete walls, the white bathroom, the iron<br />

door from which his food and his nightmares came, were<br />

irrelevant, artificial, unchangingly fake. Though this was<br />

all he could touch or move through physically, it was the<br />

world in the window that was the source of all his<br />

thoughts. Looking down upon the world that was outside<br />

the room and the tower, he watched the twisting, erratic<br />

lives of the people below. He understood that once he had<br />

been one of them, and the thought brought tears of<br />

longing to his eyes.<br />

His view of the world below was limited. He could not<br />

hear the people speak or see them when they went into<br />

buildings, save when he saw them through their windows.<br />

Understanding the purpose of their daily movements only<br />

grew more confusing the more he followed their daily<br />

lives. At first they simply seemed to move in and out of<br />

vehicles and buildings, never for any apparent purpose.<br />

After a while though, he saw that individual people<br />

followed a nearly identical pattern each day. Most would<br />

emerge from the same vehicle, enter the same building at<br />

the same time each morning and sit by the same window<br />

each day, before departing each evening for areas<br />

unknown. The reason for these routines was impossible to<br />

determine, and the small variation in behaviour puzzled<br />

him further. Yet the first decision he ever remembered<br />

making was that one day he would understand these<br />

people below him.<br />

Much of their behaviour was explained when he learnt to<br />

read. He could at first gain no meaning from the strange<br />

symbols that covered the outside world but, over the<br />

course of several months he realised there were<br />

connections between certain sequences of characters and<br />

the picture on billboards and shopfronts. After that<br />

teaching himself was easy. He would read newspapers or<br />

books over the shoulder of people in the streets. He never<br />

gave thought to his ability to distinguish the small text on<br />

the pages of the book 100 storeys below, or the fact that<br />

he could read an entire page with a glance whilst the<br />

readers below would stare at a page for several minutes,<br />

just as he never gave thought to what was in the grey soup<br />

that appeared through a slit in the iron door every day.<br />

25<br />

What he did think about was how much more he could<br />

understand through reading. He learnt so many new<br />

words and their meanings, how they related to the<br />

seemingly pointless routines of those below. He learnt<br />

about jobs and money and work. One interesting word<br />

that kept popping up was freedom. He learnt about that<br />

when he saw the two sign-wielding mobs converge on<br />

each other in the park. They seemed to be very angry<br />

and were shouting at each other. Both groups seemed to<br />

believe that the other was trying to take away their<br />

freedom, and they all considered freedom to be very<br />

important. It seemed that freedom was the ability to do<br />

what one wanted, when one wanted. So it confused him<br />

when, after the riot, everyone returned to following the<br />

exact same daily routine they had before; it seemed to<br />

defeat the point of all the shouting and waving of signs<br />

for the sake of freedom.<br />

The first of the nightmares came when he was five years<br />

old. Faceless men in white coats came through the iron<br />

door and dragged him, screaming, down the white<br />

corridors beyond. When they arrived at the glass room he<br />

was tied down to a table. The men in white coats attached<br />

tubes and machines to his body and the world disappeared<br />

into a whirlwind of shocks, lights and pure pain.<br />

He was never sure if the nightmare echoed something that<br />

had actually happened all he knew was that from then on<br />

he could follow people beyond where he could before. His<br />

eyes followed them into buildings and watched them<br />

through the walls of their homes. He saw all. There was<br />

so much that went on behind walls. He learnt of families,<br />

of work and of sex. Each explained a lot that had<br />

previously confused him about the behaviour of the<br />

people outside. Yet, at the same time, it made the world<br />

below even more complex and difficult to understand.<br />

Why did the woman who worked from dawn to dusk in<br />

the highest offices, wearing a bright smile and beautiful<br />

clothes, break into tears every time she stepped through<br />

the door of her empty apartment? Why did the man who<br />

rode the garbage-collecting truck every morning and who<br />

waited outside the shopping centre in uniform with his<br />

head hung every night, suddenly gain a spring in his step<br />

the moment he saw his children?


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

He could now hear them too. It was difficult, often, to<br />

find interesting talk over the incessant buzz of millions<br />

of people gossiping about nothing but he found that the<br />

more serious and interesting conversations, few as they<br />

were, were generally had privately, and sounded generally<br />

more hesitant, as if talking about something serious was<br />

something to be ashamed of. He also learnt the power<br />

words had over people. Over several weeks he saw a man<br />

beat a woman each night, each night she picked herself<br />

off the ground, seemingly unchanged. One night he heard<br />

her speak, screaming words like ‘failure’ and ‘nothing’.<br />

The man had turned without a word, ascended the<br />

stairwell of their apartment building and flung himself<br />

from the roof. Then there was the young olive-skinned<br />

girl in the headscarf who laughed when she spoke and<br />

skipped when she walked until she first came to one of<br />

the buildings the people called schools. The Child in the<br />

tower heard taunts of ‘Paki’ and ‘terrorist,’ follow her<br />

through the day. He never saw her laugh again.<br />

The second nightmare came three years after the first.<br />

Once more the figures in white coats took him through<br />

the iron door. This time the glass room was occupied<br />

by a great whirring machine in which was embedded a<br />

chair. Remembering the pain of before he struggled and<br />

scratched and bit at the men, but they would not let go,<br />

and forced him into the chair. As the machine began to<br />

move around him he started to hear whispers coming<br />

from everywhere and nowhere. He looked out but the<br />

men in white coats had their lips sealed. The whispering<br />

grew louder until it screamed through his mind, blotting<br />

out everything. Yet each individual whisper sounded no<br />

louder than it had before. It was like more and more tiny<br />

voices were beginning to speak, asking for something,<br />

anything, but he could not hear what. After the whispering<br />

came the feeling and it was like nothing else in the world.<br />

Each whisper came with an emotion, a taste, and as he felt<br />

them he understood them. Longing, despair, pity, sadness,<br />

hope-ambition-anger-joy-jealousy-lovehatesatisfactionlustfearcarewantdisgusthelplessnessavaricealienation<br />

… It was<br />

too much. The last thing he saw before he fell into blissful<br />

nothingness were the burning, black eyes of one of the<br />

men in white coats, the last whisper he heard was, ‘Soon.’<br />

When he woke in his room, deathly cold and aching, the<br />

whispering and feeling still remained, just weaker. When<br />

he looked down from the window he found that it was the<br />

people below who were whispering. Whispering without<br />

moving their lips, even as they said aloud something<br />

completely unlike what they whispered, whilst their<br />

emotions rose from them like a scent.<br />

He understood. This was what was in each person’s<br />

mind. That was when he knew the world was wrong.<br />

The people’s spoken words rarely, if ever, matched the<br />

whispers and the feelings. It was clear too that no one<br />

knew what they wanted, let alone what would make<br />

them happy. All around him he felt warm sparks of love,<br />

contentment, resolve or hope rise up, only to disappear<br />

with the reading of a report from a teacher, a conversation<br />

with an employer, a phone call from a lover, a headline in<br />

the papers or an announcement from a judge. And there<br />

were so many who were just so wrong in what they<br />

thought they wanted. Office workers infuriated him. Each<br />

person had a feeling of something missing, and believed<br />

they could find it in one of the offices on the floor above.<br />

The strange thing was, those in the offices above felt<br />

exactly the same about the offices above them, only<br />

the feeling of emptiness seemed for the most part even<br />

stronger. He did not like looking into the hearts of the<br />

men who sat at the long tables at the top of the office<br />

towers. They were completely empty, often cruel or<br />

miserable; and seemed to want to eat everything. And yet<br />

everyone below them seemed desperate to become like<br />

them. The boy in the tower pitied these people the most.<br />

Yet they were everywhere, sucking the life from<br />

themselves and others; in the offices, in homes, in the<br />

parliament building, everywhere.<br />

On 21 December in the year 2012, at dawn, the boy in<br />

the tower had a visitor. The iron door opened once more.<br />

The Child was not afraid; he had felt the fear of billions<br />

and knew what was worth fearing and what was not. The<br />

man with the black eyes greeted him. The Child heard<br />

every thought in his head before he said it. The man<br />

spoke with the feverish excitement of one whose entire life<br />

had been dedicated to that moment. ‘You understand now,<br />

why we did this to you? We needed someone who saw<br />

what we saw even more clearly than we did, one who<br />

26


BENCHMARK<br />

The Watcher continued<br />

could find the answer. The world is broken, and must be<br />

fixed. Do you know what must be done?’ The Child<br />

looked down on the suffering world below him and for<br />

the first time in his life, he spoke. His voice was like a<br />

great crowd speaking in unison, telling of an end and a<br />

beginning, radiating terrible knowledge and an utter,<br />

terrifying power. The man with the burning black eyes<br />

shivered as a single word reverberated through the room,<br />

shattering every window, reducing the iron door to dust.<br />

‘Yes.’<br />

Nick Pether<br />

Year 11<br />

27


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

The Unseen Foe<br />

Amun turned his head from the harsh sting of the desert<br />

wind, his dark, powerful legs shifting painfully in the<br />

sand with each laboured step he took. Sucking the dry<br />

air through his coarse tunic, relief overcame Amun as the<br />

steady rattle of heavily laden saddles finally ceased, the<br />

weary camels squatting in the golden sand to let down<br />

their riders and rest what were undoubtedly exhausted<br />

legs. Slumping to the ground like the animals, Amun<br />

emptied the last of what had once been a bulging<br />

waterskin into is mouth, his parched throat throbbing<br />

with pain as he swallowed and observed the other men.<br />

Garbed in the dark blue robes of the royal warriors, the<br />

eight men stood tall; black silhouettes against the distant<br />

sun, their ghostly shadows streaked across the desert as<br />

they exchanged glances, waiting grimly by their respective<br />

animals. Only one camel remained on its feet, its golden<br />

saddle glinting with the touch of loose rays of sunlight, its<br />

rider perched seemingly motionless atop its humped back.<br />

Engrossed by what appeared to be a thin, tattered scroll<br />

and its miniscule glyphs, the King’s eyes scanned the page<br />

with intense fixation, as if searching for some crucial<br />

detail he’d missed the last million times. Comparing the<br />

gaping, stone entrance to one of the faded symbols, the<br />

King dismounted, smiling as he rolled the fragile paper<br />

up for the first time in many days.<br />

The life of a slave was not, traditionally, an adventurous<br />

one, and looking back at the vast horizon that extended as<br />

far as the eye could see, Amun was acutely aware of how<br />

far the King’s journey had taken them from the land they<br />

called home. Though the kingdom held little opportunity<br />

for Amun, the familiarity of his simple room and palace<br />

duties were daily comforts he was learning to live without.<br />

As one of the luckier royal slaves, Amun was to be at the<br />

beck and call of the divine Prince, and had seen the<br />

younger man grow up into the strong and admired King<br />

he had become. Although nobody knew with certainty,<br />

some speculated that the King and his leading slave had<br />

developed a relationship, over the course of years, which<br />

was almost akin to friendship. Though merely rumour,<br />

just the notion of befriending a slave, let alone one of dark<br />

skin, was enough to trigger a strong sense of disapproval<br />

amongst various members of the community. Amun was<br />

regularly insulted when the King’s back was turned, and<br />

had long grown to be grateful for his just master’s<br />

unwavering sense of integrity.<br />

Only when thinking back to those days gone by,<br />

remembering the young King and their close friendship,<br />

did Amun appreciate how much had changed as they’d<br />

matured. Despite the King’s broader shoulders and ageing<br />

face, Amun was one of the few to see that the greatest<br />

changes were invisible to the eye, observing his friend on<br />

a daily basis. The signs had been subtle at first: a declined<br />

meal or a sad glance at his reflection. Yet it wasn’t long<br />

before the shroud of mystery was raised from Amun’s eyes.<br />

Known as a great and fearless warrior, it seemed that there<br />

was no foe that struck fear in the heart of the King, but<br />

Amun was astute enough to know that not all foes rode in<br />

speeding chariots, spears brandished high. For some, the<br />

enemy took the form of the setting sun, the passing of<br />

numbered days, and the feeling of time slowly slipping away<br />

like sand in an hourglass. Time was the foe which even the<br />

fiercest warrior and wisest king were subject to; a concept<br />

that Amun could see his friend struggling to accept.<br />

Even as his youth inevitably took flight, the King pursued<br />

it valiantly, remaining impressively fit and perceptive,<br />

while meeting regularly with his healers and priests.<br />

Though the King had been able to slow down the clock,<br />

Amun could see that he knew he was fighting a losing<br />

battle. Though it was not in the nature of their<br />

relationship to talk about such issues, Amun often<br />

wondered if the obsession with youth stemmed from the<br />

absence of children in the King’s life, a respected son or<br />

a beautiful daughter. Though he had held many titles,<br />

‘Father’ had never been one of them. Whatever the source<br />

was, Amun would look into his friend’s eyes more and<br />

more to find defeat, and too often would he hear him<br />

speaking about what would become of the kingdom<br />

without him. Though Amun had seen otherwise, the<br />

King assured him that his worry was for the people and<br />

the future of the kingdom, not for himself. So grew an<br />

increasing curiosity in immortality, and cheating the bite<br />

of death.<br />

Seeing his once lively friend withdraw into himself, Amun<br />

refused to help his master for the first time, as the King<br />

searched the palace archives, uncharacteristically<br />

28


BENCHMARK<br />

The Unseen Foe continued<br />

frantic, for an ancient scroll that promised saviour<br />

from sure doom. Awoken one night, by the echo of a<br />

triumphant cry, Amun’s memory was still burnt with the<br />

image of the deranged King, his crazed eyes wide open<br />

with hungry focus, on his knees, filthy robes sticking to<br />

his clammy skin. His eyes darted across the scroll’s tiny<br />

lines of symbols. The royal warriors had been summoned<br />

at once, to prepare for a journey that was to commence<br />

the next morning.<br />

‘This is it Amun. The solution is within reach,’ the King<br />

said and his voice filled with hope, ‘You must come Amun,<br />

This marks a new era in the kingdom’s history!’<br />

‘I will not, Master,’ replied Amun, his deep voice<br />

brimming with conviction, his heavy brow framing<br />

firm eyes.<br />

‘You will not?’ hissed the King with feigned hurt, ‘I think<br />

you forget your place, Amun.’<br />

‘As a friend, I cannot condone this, Master. That which<br />

you desire can only lead to evil,’ Amun murmured,<br />

disturbed by the mocking tone in his friend’s voice.<br />

‘You misunderstand Amun. You WILL come,’ the King<br />

interrupted bitterly, his bearded face creased with disbelief.<br />

‘Remember you are first my slave, and second my friend,’<br />

he finished dismissively, turning his back on Amun.<br />

Stunned by the King’s outburst, Amun silenced himself,<br />

sensing that this was not the man he had once known and<br />

called brother. The next morning, no warm citizens, or<br />

grand spectacles saw them off, but only the dappled light<br />

of the rising dawn sun. The company of ten left in secret,<br />

a silent string of camels disappearing into the distance on<br />

the scroll’s bearing. Unworthy to command his own steed,<br />

Amun had grudgingly agreed to take turns riding with<br />

the warriors, silently wondering what was in store for<br />

the company.<br />

Woken from memory by the sharp whistle of a muscular<br />

solider, Amun raised himself from the sand, steadying<br />

himself on a nearby camel as he saw the King take the<br />

first step into the ominous, columned entrance.<br />

29<br />

‘You will stay here mud-skin!’ the solider barked cruelly, as<br />

Amun also began to walk towards the entrance. ‘Stay with<br />

the animals, where you belong.’<br />

Ignoring the insults, Amun obeyed the order, waiting<br />

until the glow of torches had completely disappeared<br />

into the blackness before pursuing them with tired legs.<br />

Padding into the recess, the rough, stone ground was cold<br />

and hard against Amun’s bare, calloused feet, as he<br />

followed the echo of men’s voices. Turning a corner,<br />

Amun saw light appear as the narrow tunnel arced out<br />

into a vast, empty cavern. Cutting the blackness, a wide<br />

beam of light cascaded from what must have been a hole<br />

at the top of the chamber, illuminating a small silver altar<br />

which the King and royal warriors approached, dropping<br />

their torches. Tempted to emerge from the shadows,<br />

Amun controlled the impulse, muscles tensed as he waited<br />

to see what would unfold. As the blue warriors backed<br />

away, the King approached the altar slowly and seized<br />

the small, shining orb that floated above it. His eyes filled<br />

with blatant awe, the King gazed into the orb, his<br />

reflection distorted by his desires as he looked into the<br />

eyes of a younger version of himself.<br />

‘Youth,’ the King said, the word barely floating from his<br />

open mouth as the orb began to glow, its light reflected in<br />

his glazed eyes.<br />

Amazed, Amun watched on speechlessly as the orb burned<br />

with the intensity of the sun, filling the vast cavern with<br />

bright, golden light. As a current of wind began to circle<br />

around him, the King could feel warmth spreading<br />

through his body, as he felt the weight of age lift from his<br />

shoulders. Overcome with astonishment, Amun barely<br />

dared believe his eyes as he saw the King’s golden skin<br />

tightening over his muscular frame, and his greying hair<br />

return to its original black, catching the light like the<br />

midnight sky. Then, turning his eyes to the eight warriors,<br />

Amun witnessed the horror which the obsessed King had<br />

been blinded. Their eyes wide with shock, embedded in<br />

sagging eye sockets, the warriors wheezed with pain as<br />

their youth was sapped by the glowing orbs and<br />

channelled into the King. With their athletic bodies<br />

thinning with rapid age, the warriors fell one by one<br />

collapsing into dusty husks of their former selves, as


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

Amun finally burst from the shadows and the glow of the<br />

orb began to fade.<br />

Eyes filled with the glow of youth, the King’s hypnosis<br />

was shattered by the slapping of bare feet against smooth,<br />

black stone. Absorbing the scene around him, the joy<br />

faded from the King’s eyes as he dropped the orb. Amun<br />

came to rest by his side and placed a comforting hand on<br />

his shoulder. Falling to his knees the King’s eyes brimmed<br />

with sorrow, as he stared into the hollow eyes of his<br />

obsession’s victims. Having conquered his unseen foe, the<br />

King felt no joy in victory as he was overcome with a guilt<br />

that remained as fresh as his youthful body for many<br />

years to come.<br />

Nicholas Bucci<br />

Year 11<br />

30


BENCHMARK<br />

An After Dinner Speech<br />

Soon after the party had gathered in the drawing room<br />

and the footmen had gone to work returning the dining<br />

room to its usual appearance. After the men had smoked<br />

their cigars and indulged in a post-prandial brandy. It may<br />

seem strange that this was not just a house party but the<br />

scene of a murder, but of course the victim was an<br />

Englishman, and the last thing he would have wanted was<br />

to make a scene, especially in someone else’s house. And<br />

so the guests and the servants carried on as usual, the fires<br />

were lit, the pheasants were shot, and at breakfast, the<br />

morning after the body had been discovered, the eggs and<br />

kippers were laid down on the sideboard.<br />

The only change had been the presence of an extra man<br />

around the house, neither servant nor guest, destroying<br />

the rather feudal comfort of the guests upstairs,<br />

reminding them of the changes of the world outside.<br />

Tonight this detective, dispatched from the local<br />

constabulary, having shuffled around behind the curtains,<br />

inquiring and investigating, took centre stage. He had, he<br />

believed, arrived at a conclusion; after just a few days of<br />

feverish work he knew the identity of the murderer.<br />

It was a fairly ordinary group that weekend at Mulcaster<br />

Hall. Earl Montfort, our host sat closest to the fire, his<br />

wife Countess Montfort was perched on the sofa, her<br />

brother, had rather inconveniently died from the shot of<br />

a pistol through the head. Next to Lady Montfort on the<br />

sofa was the Honourable George Standish, who had<br />

brought his wife, Constance to the shoot. Charlie<br />

Carmody was admiring a Gainsborough, as Mr Meeks,<br />

a Fellow at Worcester College, Oxford, a mathematician<br />

and an amateur historian who was writing a history of<br />

Mulcaster Hall, tried to tell him some story about the 4th<br />

Earl, who evidently had suffered from gout. Lady Honoria,<br />

the Earl’s daughter sat at an angle to a mirror, glancing at<br />

herself when she felt she wasn’t being watched. The final<br />

guests Sir Richard Jenkins and Lady Pamela sat opposite<br />

their hostess.<br />

At the centre stood Inspector Johnson, an impressive man,<br />

with a great mane of brown hair, and the assured<br />

confidence of one who believes himself to be eminently<br />

capable. ‘I think it’s time I began.’ The assorted guests<br />

took their place, Lady Honoria checked her watch, and<br />

Mr Meeks lowered himself slowly onto a padded footrest<br />

31<br />

and placed his hands in his pockets as he sat, rather<br />

awkwardly.<br />

‘As you know, three days ago Mr John Beechman, the<br />

Oxford Don, and brother of Lady Montfort was shot<br />

through the head as he read a copy of Country Life. Mr<br />

Beechman was a noted scholar of mathematics, a pillar<br />

of his local parish and yet at the very prime of his life this<br />

fine gentleman was cut down, as he enjoyed a solitary<br />

moment, in this very house.’<br />

‘Could we do away with the melodrama, Johnson? We<br />

know who he was.’ Sir Richard was known as a man with<br />

a low tolerance for time wasting after nine o’clock, when<br />

his bed beckoned.<br />

‘Of course Sir Richard, of course, yes, right, I was just<br />

about to … yes. Ladies and gentleman those of you<br />

familiar with the sort of work I do will know that the<br />

detective looks for motive and means. And while the<br />

murder weapon has yet to be found, and no one was seen<br />

around Mr Beechman’s room at the time of his death<br />

these are all we are left, with which to consider.’<br />

‘Then who do you suppose to be the murderer, Mr<br />

Johnson?’ Lady Montfort tilted her head slightly to one<br />

side as she spoke to the man standing in front of her.<br />

‘Well, if I may say so Your Ladyship, you have struck at the<br />

very heart of the matter. I don’t think that it is a secret<br />

that Lady Montfort and her brother are the only children<br />

of a Mr Robert Beechman, a man born to limited means<br />

who established himself in South Africa, built up a great<br />

shipping company and at the time of his death was<br />

rumoured to be worth millions of pounds.’<br />

‘What of it, Mr Johnson?’ Lord Montfort spoke slowly as<br />

he queried the police man.<br />

‘Well, my Lord, many of those here would know that your<br />

wife’s money came very much in handy at the time when<br />

your father’s death duties had to be paid.’<br />

‘I would prefer it Johnson if you did not discuss my private<br />

financial affairs, in my own drawing room, in front of<br />

my guests.’<br />

‘It pains me to say it Lord Montfort but I must continue.<br />

It was in a conversation with Mr Standish that I


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

discovered that your lordship has in recent times, despite<br />

the wealth of your wife, been caught out.’<br />

‘I beg your pardon?’<br />

‘I’m sorry my Lord, this is difficult but apparently through<br />

a combination of bad luck on the horses and the recent<br />

troubles on the stock exchange, you have found yourself<br />

rather short of cash.’<br />

‘You vulgar, little man …’<br />

‘But your brother-in-law was a bachelor, and as a result<br />

of his father’s industry, a man of considerable means. Is<br />

it not true that your wife was the heiress to his wealth?’<br />

‘You’re not seriously suggesting that I would murder my<br />

wife’s husband?’<br />

‘Sir, you have a strong motive, and as you keep a<br />

considerable collection of guns in the house, you have<br />

the means.’<br />

‘Well, ask the gamekeeper, he has the key, ask if I’ve taken<br />

a gun out in the last few days.’<br />

‘A man employed by you sir. Hardly a reliable witness, I<br />

think you’ll agree.’<br />

‘This is truly ridiculous. I wouldn’t kill a man and what’s<br />

more I’m not in any serious trouble on the markets, just<br />

down a few beans. What would Standish know anyway?’<br />

‘I’m sorry sir but you have means, and you have motives.<br />

You must understand my situation,’ as he spoke Inspector<br />

Johnson slowly moved towards the supposed murderer.<br />

‘I’m afraid that I have …’<br />

‘He couldn’t have murdered John,’ from beside her<br />

husband Constance Standish said in a squeaking voice,<br />

‘He couldn’t have.’<br />

‘Why not? May I ask …’ the inspector had stopped<br />

midstride.<br />

‘Because, because, that night he was with me.’ An uneasy<br />

silence settled over the room, Constance maintained eye<br />

contact with Inspector Johnson, Lord Montfort studied<br />

the ceiling, and his wife her nails. Finally Johnson spoke.<br />

‘I see, I see … the whole evening?’ Mrs Standish, with a<br />

tiny motion nodded. Beside her, her husband shook, but<br />

remained silent.<br />

‘Well, Lord Montfort, I apologise.’<br />

‘What’s more, Uncle John didn’t have any money did he<br />

Daddy?’ Lady Honoria said to her father, ‘Mummy’s<br />

father left him nothing after he went into mathematics,<br />

rather than shipping.’<br />

‘Well then, well then, it appears I was wrong. I can only<br />

apologise again Lord Montfort, and of course to you<br />

Lady Montfort.’<br />

‘It appears you will need more time Mr Johnson, or<br />

perhaps it would be for the best if another detective were<br />

to continue this case.’ Lord Montfort addressed the<br />

portrait of his ancestor on the wall as he spoke.<br />

‘Perhaps that would be for the best my Lord.’ Once again<br />

silence returned to the room, as the unpleasantness settled<br />

among the guests. Only Mr Meeks seemed oblivious to it,<br />

turning from face to face, trying to make eye contact, to<br />

read unspoken words. Soon he began to stand up.<br />

‘Well what an odd evening, an odd evening indeed. It<br />

rather reminds me of that story about the sixth Earl after<br />

the Battle of Waterloo. Do you recall it Lord Montfort?’<br />

As he spoke he removed his hands from his pockets, and<br />

with them a small revolver fell to the ground.<br />

Luca Moretti<br />

Year 12<br />

32


BENCHMARK<br />

Chess<br />

A short gasp, then the crowd, as one, exhaled. It had only<br />

been a matter of time before Vladimir Aronian yielded,<br />

before he ended his own misery, and now the time had<br />

come. Again Thomas Adams, the British Champion, had<br />

played brilliantly against his Russian opponent, and with<br />

checkmate imminent, Aronian ungraciously resigned,<br />

murmuring ‘game,’ resetting his king, then swiftly<br />

departing the floodlit stage. Adams had an enormous 5–1<br />

lead in the best of twelve games of the World Chess<br />

Championship final: an hour later, he was dead.<br />

At the post match news-conference, journalists launched<br />

into extravagant comparisons with Bobby Fischer, focusing<br />

on Adams’ place among the greatest of all time.<br />

‘It’s been said that your play has brought in a whole new era<br />

of chess,’ said one. ‘Would you agree?’<br />

Thomas Adams opened his bottle of water and drank, as<br />

much to give himself time to think as to quench his thirst.<br />

He took a long draught, and then froze. The bottle slipped<br />

from his hand and crashed onto the table and, as though in<br />

slow motion, he slumped forward. That was the image<br />

flashed around the globe by the world’s news media. First<br />

reports speculated that Adams had died of a heart attack.<br />

It took less than twenty-four hours to discover that he had<br />

been poisoned.<br />

Scotland Yard’s Chief Inspector Richard Dadswell was<br />

given the case after an autopsy revealed that Adams<br />

favourite water bottle had been laced with a lethal quantity<br />

of hydrogen peroxide, a colourless, odourless substance<br />

often found in common bleach.<br />

Dadswell had little more than a rudimentary<br />

understanding of chess. He knew, of course, the<br />

Championship was underway at London’s plush<br />

Savoy Hotel.<br />

He soon discovered it was a much grander affair than he<br />

had realised, taking place on a specially constructed stage<br />

in the hotel’s grandiose ballroom, viewed by hundreds of<br />

people who paid good money to watch. There were just<br />

three men on the stage, Adams, Aronian and a nervous<br />

little East-European gentleman who was the Arbiter.<br />

Each move was projected onto a huge screen behind the<br />

competitors, and there was serious betting on the outcome.<br />

33<br />

Aronian was hostile when Dadswell spoke to him.<br />

‘Adams is a fraud, a pompous patzer. So far he has won<br />

four games and we have drawn two. But he is not that good.<br />

I know he is not. I am glad he is dead because he doesn’t<br />

deserve to be World Champion. I know.’<br />

‘Winning means so much to you?’<br />

‘Of course. It is my whole life. I am a chess player and this<br />

is the World Championship. But, I did not kill Adams. I<br />

would like to shake the hand of the man who did, though.’<br />

Dadswell got little further with the Arbiter who seemed<br />

terrified but at least gave him some background into the<br />

event.<br />

A chess game could take up to six or seven hours, he told<br />

Dadswell. Between moves the players, accompanied by a<br />

security guard, could retire to their own rooms for comfort<br />

breaks, food or even just to get away from the bright lights.<br />

They were forbidden, however, to talk to anyone or to<br />

access any electronic devices.<br />

Dadswell’s chat with the security guard produced its own<br />

shocking revelation: Aronian was right: Adams was a cheat.<br />

‘I’m only telling you this because if I get done for cheating,<br />

well that’s one thing, but I had nothing to do with his<br />

murder,’ Emma Jacks told Dadswell.<br />

‘How did he cheat?’<br />

‘A few days before the match, his manager, Albert Tindall,<br />

offered me a lot of money to pass on information to Adams.<br />

You see Tindall was working with a computer and would<br />

text me moves. I’d write them down on toilet paper for<br />

Adams who read them and then flushed them away.<br />

Tindall was betting on the games and raking in millions.<br />

Funny thing is that I don’t think Adams was all that<br />

interested in the money. He cared about winning.’<br />

‘Who else was in on the scam?’<br />

‘Adam’s playing partner, Tim Keene may have been, but<br />

I don’t think so. He’s always short of money.’<br />

‘One last thing. Who had access to Adams’ water bottle?’


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

‘That water bottle! They say sportsmen are superstitious.<br />

Well, Adams was too. He always had to have that particular<br />

water bottle. Anyone in his room after the day’s play could<br />

have picked it up.’<br />

Dadswell shook his head meditatively as he left the security<br />

guard in the charge of a uniformed officer. Chess players<br />

were difficult people. He knew how they could predict<br />

moves in advance; he only wished that he could do the<br />

same. He understood what to look for, however, and what<br />

types of evidence to use. Whenever he was given an<br />

unusual assignment, Dadswell often found that the best<br />

place to start was with the basics, those elements that are<br />

present in every crime … An idea came to him and the<br />

detective made a quick phone call to his office before<br />

interviewing Adams’ playing partner, Tim Keene.<br />

‘I was told that you left the room about an hour before the<br />

end. Why was that?’ Dadswell asked.<br />

‘My job was to help Adams prepare. I could see that he was<br />

going to win that game, and I wanted to get ready for the<br />

next one.’<br />

‘What about the betting and cheating?’<br />

‘You know about that?’<br />

‘The guard confessed’<br />

‘Tindall was the only one betting. Adams just wanted to<br />

win. In fact before yesterday’s game they had a big blow-up<br />

about it. Adams wanted Tindall to stop betting in case<br />

someone found out about the cheating. They were really<br />

vicious.’<br />

‘Where were you after the game?’<br />

‘In Adams’ room. We all were.’<br />

When Dadswell confronted Tindall with the cheating<br />

allegation he denied it vehemently, even threatening to sue<br />

if such accusations were made public. When Dadswell<br />

made it plain that both Emma Jacks and Tim Keene had<br />

confessed, he changed his tune.<br />

‘Don’t make it public. Please. That will end my career in the<br />

chess world. I was never a great player, but I am a good<br />

manager. This could finish me.’<br />

‘This will be public and you won’t just be finished. You will<br />

be in jail,’ came Dadswell’s reply. ‘At this stage a charge of<br />

murder is likely to be added too.’<br />

‘Okay. We cheated and I made money. But I didn’t kill him.<br />

How would that help me?’<br />

‘Keene said that Adams promised to lose the last game if<br />

you didn’t stop betting.’<br />

‘I knew Adams wouldn’t do that. I know him well. He cared<br />

too much about winning to do that. He would never throw<br />

a game. But how did Keene hear him? I didn’t even know<br />

that he knew about the betting.’<br />

‘Of course, of course …!’ Dadswell slammed the table with<br />

his fist.<br />

Picking up the telephone he called his office again, barking<br />

out a few quick orders. Dadswell could sense the important<br />

pieces of evidence: some fitted together, others stood out<br />

and seemed incongruous. He needed some final<br />

information, he needed to confirm his suspicions, but if he<br />

was right, he would be able to form the whole picture. Then<br />

he turned to Tindall.<br />

‘A uniformed officer is outside your room. You will stay here<br />

under guard until my investigation is complete.’<br />

With a certain sense of theatre, Dadswell gathered all<br />

concerned in the murder beneath the chandeliers of the<br />

Savoy Hotel’s ballroom. He always took care in his<br />

denouement: he found it important to describe the case bit<br />

by bit, teasing out the solution for his audience with shrewd<br />

logic. Thomas Adams’ team was there, as was Vladimir<br />

Aronian’s, although not all by choice.<br />

‘Firstly, I am charging Albert Tindall, Emma Jacks and Tim<br />

Keene with illegally profiting from cheating on the World<br />

Chess Championships.’<br />

‘I knew it,’ shouted Aronian. ‘I said he was a swindler.’<br />

Dadswell raised his voice.<br />

‘I am also charging Tim Keene with the murder of Thomas<br />

Adams. A few days ago Adams had an argument with<br />

Tindall about him betting on the games, and demanded<br />

that he stop. He threatened to lose his next game if it didn’t<br />

cease. He was worried that there would be a money<br />

34


BENCHMARK<br />

Chess continued<br />

trail leading back to the team. Keene only heard that part<br />

of the conversation, and he doesn’t know Adams the way<br />

Tindall does. Tindall knew that game was too important<br />

for Adams to throw, but Keene borrowed a large sum to put<br />

on a bet against Adams. It seemed like a good way of<br />

making money since Aronian was at such long odds to win.<br />

It was only when he realised that Adams was going to win,<br />

he was enraged because he thought he’d been tricked, and<br />

wanted revenge. Keene left before the game ended. CCTV<br />

footage shows him entering a convenience store at Charing<br />

Cross station and buying a bottle of bleach. After that it<br />

was a simple matter of pouring a deadly amount into<br />

Adams’ favourite water bottle. Your entire team was<br />

involved in a daring gambit, but Adams is dead and you<br />

three are going to jail.’<br />

Rupert Coy<br />

Year 12<br />

35


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

An excerpt from<br />

The First Branch<br />

Coke wasn’t the right choice. Apparently neither was<br />

Schweppes or Pepsi, as the customer, Jack, kept opening<br />

and closing doors, and pacing about the back corner of<br />

the shop. He was nervous, that was plain enough, with<br />

sweat starting to bead on his face and the beginnings of a<br />

twitch. The dark jacket he wore wasn’t helping. It was<br />

barely reasonable to be wearing even a shirt in the heat, let<br />

alone something like that. It was one of those modern<br />

attempts at innovation. This one had ended up with the<br />

zipper at a slant. After a while the shopkeeper lost interest<br />

and turned back to his newspaper, certain that if<br />

something was stolen the cameras would record it.<br />

The surprise came when the man ripped the newspaper<br />

away from the shopkeeper and started to make demands.<br />

‘Give me all the money in the till!’ Jack tried to follow this<br />

with a threatening glare. It amounted to a scrunched face<br />

and didn’t help him hide his desperation.<br />

The man behind the counter faced two opposing<br />

reactions: the urge to laugh, or to recoil in shock. The<br />

result was a look of confusion. He was not particularly<br />

worried. There were no weapons waving at him, and his<br />

father’s bed time stories of the ‘old country’ had prepared<br />

him for worse than this. Company policy was to just hand<br />

over the money in the till and let the insurance worry<br />

about the consequences. It was cheaper than hospital bills,<br />

or worse, the legal nightmare of a court case. However, he<br />

couldn’t help but imagine the reaction his grandfather<br />

would have had in his position. No manager’s lesson about<br />

occupational health and safety would have stopped him<br />

from slamming the rude stranger’s face into the counter<br />

and making a story that would tour the local bars. But the<br />

shopkeeper was a different man, and this was a different<br />

age: he was dressed in a neat uniform, with a name badge<br />

that said ‘Yuri’ in elegant blue writing, sucking away all<br />

feelings of aggression he might have had as defender of<br />

the shop. Even his sculpted beard looked ridiculous in the<br />

outfit. That was the worst of it.<br />

‘Well? Are you going to give me all the money that<br />

Armaguard van dropped off, or will I have to make you?’<br />

Jack prodded again, struggling to maintain some<br />

semblance of a serious threat. The mantra ran through his<br />

balding head: Be confident, be confident, this is your<br />

chance.<br />

The younger man behind the counter rolled his eyes and<br />

began to open the cash register, while thinking about the<br />

notes in his back pocket. A few months ago he had<br />

decided to start anew. His family had been close enough<br />

to people like Ratko Mladic in Bosnia to induce a conflict<br />

of loyalty in an Australianised boy. Mentioning the war<br />

was extremely taboo, but the same madness was buried in<br />

the family’s daily habits. It’s not that they practised<br />

genocide on bunnies or anything, but that the way they<br />

looked at the world, at justice, was different to everyone<br />

else, and even most of their homeland. The two<br />

perspectives could simply not merge. At first, Yuri hadn’t<br />

been sure how he might avoid his likely fate. He’d only<br />

ever worked as a manual labourer, shovelling, stacking,<br />

performing jobs that presumably helped keep society<br />

running, and it seemed that all escape routes had been<br />

barricaded at birth. But one day a gun fell into his hands,<br />

and he knew it was time to leave. He hadn’t been near a<br />

gun since.<br />

He made a trip to Melbourne to find the place called<br />

Craigieburn where Australia’s banknotes are printed and,<br />

after quite a lot of explaining, and more than a little luck,<br />

he got a set of freshly printed denominations. He then<br />

moved to Sydney with his sister, and used a pin to poke a<br />

tiny hole through each bill in exactly the same place, a<br />

mark of ownership. His theory had been that since he now<br />

owned a symbol for opportunity, money, he was, in some<br />

way closer to owning opportunity itself, and being in<br />

control of his own life. No one he’d explained it to<br />

understood why.<br />

Although this act was purely symbolic and sentimental, it<br />

had proved to be powerful enough to help him into a new<br />

stage of his life. He had changed his friends, met his wife,<br />

found this job, and occasionally, along the way, had given<br />

out notes from his collection to those he cared about,<br />

hoping to pass on his good fortune. There were only two<br />

left, the fifty and hundred dollar bills. The robber was<br />

impatient, but managed a smile when all the shop’s cash<br />

was put into a plastic bag and handed over. He wasn’t sure<br />

how to react to the ease with which it seemed to be<br />

36


BENCHMARK<br />

An excerpt from<br />

The First Branch continued<br />

going, but habit found him in his moment of need.<br />

‘Thank you.’ As soon as he’d said this the absurdity of the<br />

situation struck him and he blushed. At this the employee<br />

was convinced of the man’s need, and brought out the $50<br />

bill, holding it for the stranger to take. ‘Take this. I know<br />

it’s just money, but it helped me when I needed it. It can<br />

become your chance at the life you want. Please, just<br />

think about it.’<br />

‘What…?’ Jack said, intrigued that his own mantra was<br />

coming from a stranger. He stifled the rest of his reply,<br />

realising that the more time he wasted, the more likely<br />

jail became.<br />

Hurriedly, the robber took the note, said goodbye and<br />

walked out of the shop as casually as he could. He paced<br />

up towards the intersection the enormous Coca-Cola sign<br />

guarded, considering what had just happened. Jack looked<br />

at the note, then over his shoulder at the convenience<br />

store’s employee. He’d come out of the shop’s door to<br />

watch Jack’s getaway. The man looked confident and<br />

relaxed, much more than he could say for himself. To run<br />

would be foolish, so Jack kept his pace and tried to<br />

understand Yuri the shopkeeper. Maybe there was<br />

something to this ‘gift’? What was more sobering was<br />

Jack’s certainty that no police had been alerted and thus<br />

no one would punish him for this crime; all from the eye<br />

contact they’d shared.<br />

The corner came and went, leaving it all to memory.<br />

The next corners after that did the same, until Jack found<br />

himself on a bench in a park. There were so many parks<br />

around Sydney that the novelty of somewhere colourfully<br />

peaceful amidst the dense throng of urban concerns was<br />

lost. This one had the characteristic grass, trees, neat<br />

design, but was all on top of a car-park.<br />

Oliver Lotz<br />

Year 12 English Extension 2 Major Work<br />

37


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

Conversations with Jane<br />

Part 1<br />

Lachlan Macquarie, a young and ambitious Scot, enjoyed a<br />

meteoric rise in the British Army. Despite humble beginnings,<br />

by the age of 38 he was a Major at the battle of Seringapatam<br />

near Bombay in 1799.<br />

1<br />

‘She was laid to rest on the 16th day of January 1797. To<br />

those who knew her modest worth no panegyric can be<br />

necessary: and to those unacquainted with her, suffice it<br />

to say that she possessed in a most eminent degree all the<br />

virtues that adorn the female character and render it<br />

worthy of universal admiration. In her manners, she was<br />

mild, affable and polite; in her disposition sweet and even;<br />

in her opinions, liberal; and in her appearance elegant<br />

without extravagance. True Christianity gave a superior<br />

lustre to all her virtues: and those of her sex who make her<br />

their pattern may with confidence anticipate a glorious<br />

immortality – and look forward with pleasure to virtue’s<br />

best reward – the applauding smile of Heaven’.<br />

Jane Jarvis Macquarie’s tomb inscription, 1797<br />

2<br />

Smoke swirled from the walls of the rebel fortress. Grey<br />

with debris, the cloud engulfed the red stone castle. The<br />

smell of charred wood and blood hung thick in the air as<br />

the heavy artillery powdered the weakest part of the wall.<br />

It had to fall at some point. It was only a matter of time.<br />

The familiar squares of red-coated British soldiers pushed<br />

forward. They appeared to swallow the ground over<br />

which they remorselessly advanced. Their Indian<br />

opponents fought without fear, but were losing their will.<br />

Many disappeared under the slow moving red mass as if<br />

they had dissolved into the earth itself. Lord have mercy.<br />

Tippoo Sahib, Sultan of Mysore, the Indian rebel leader<br />

who had eluded capture through a number of temporary<br />

treaties and lucky escapes, had finally been cornered.<br />

Crouching behind the walls of the fortress, he had to<br />

know that it was not long until his final defences would<br />

be undone. The storm of sound, a combination of gunners<br />

firing at the stone battlements and soldiers screaming<br />

directions or crying out in anguish, grew louder and<br />

louder in Tippoo’s ears.<br />

Under the tall black regimental cap and above the stiff red<br />

collar of his tunic, Major Lachlan Macquarie squinted as<br />

the rays of sunlight fell on his face. His large frame cast a<br />

long shadow on the hill from where he watched the battle.<br />

Here he was, only able to ‘observe,’ as his prized British<br />

forces tried to take the stronghold of Seringapatam from<br />

Tippoo’s rebels. Seven long years had passed since the last<br />

time he had stood here, and it was eight years since he first<br />

set foot upon the soil of India. This time, however, he was<br />

not a low ranking Lieutenant, having control of fewer<br />

than two hundred soldiers. Now he was a Major,<br />

reporting to Cornwallis himself, the Commander-in-<br />

Chief of the entire army. He would surely be rewarded<br />

with a large share of the booty from this great victory that<br />

was soon to be won. He should have been satisfied, yet<br />

still he sighed.<br />

‘I am only a spectator,’ he thought. ‘A mere spectator.’<br />

Another dry, heaving fit of coughs racked him.<br />

‘It looks as if we have the upper hand. Don’t you agree,<br />

Macquarie?’<br />

Arthur Wellesley, the zealous Colonel who had been<br />

grazed on the knee by a rebel bullet a week earlier, had<br />

been advised by his doctors not to take part in any<br />

fighting. Noticing his friend’s heaves, Wellesley continued<br />

before Macquarie could answer, ‘Are you quite well,<br />

Major?’<br />

Macquarie nodded and fixed his gaze on the battlefield.<br />

His eyes locked onto Major General David Baird leading<br />

his men closer to the walls of Tippoo’s final refuge. How<br />

he envied him. Baird’s raised sword shone as he urged on<br />

his men. The bright steel was a beacon. His men<br />

responded by surging forward, surrounding their<br />

blood-splattered leader as he slew yet another rebel.<br />

‘He may be a scoundrel, but there is nowhere found a<br />

better fellow to have in battle,’ said Macquarie.<br />

Wellesley snorted. ‘I have been informed that even his<br />

own sweet mother doesn’t defend his name.’<br />

The two men laughed.<br />

Macquarie gazed beyond the battle below, to the dry<br />

Indian landscape. The rough footpaths in the distant hills<br />

brought back painful memories of the labour he had<br />

38


BENCHMARK<br />

Conversations with Jane continued<br />

been assigned in 1792, the last time the British had<br />

attempted to defeat the rebels. His company had gouged<br />

makeshift roads for heavy artillery up the rough<br />

escarpment. It had seemed an endless challenge: to carve<br />

a flat surface into the rock hard land. It had taken them<br />

weeks. At times Macquarie had felt the task was<br />

insurmountable.<br />

The roads had been for more than just the soldiers<br />

heading into battle. Thousands of camp followers made<br />

the trip from Bombay to the fortress. Each soldier had a<br />

convoy of servants, chefs and families, as well as all the<br />

materials that they would require for war: cannons and<br />

canvas, gunpowder and swords. Continual rain and<br />

several unannounced attacks from small groups of Indian<br />

rebels had made the journey arduous and nigh on<br />

impossible. But Macquarie, with his band of sixty men,<br />

had brought glory to themselves and England.<br />

He remembered with pride when he was entrusted with<br />

the duty to build a battery base from which eighteen<br />

pounders could fire onto Fort Avery, which they had<br />

encountered on their way to Seringapatam. Without any<br />

weaponry and the majority of his men being<br />

inexperienced soldiers, he had the battery built in one<br />

night and by morning the fort had been taken. The young<br />

men had worked exceptionally well, obeying all of his<br />

commands without hesitation. It was the day he truly felt<br />

he had become a leading officer. All night the rebel<br />

musketeers had hurled heavy assaults at Macquarie’s men,<br />

and only one soul was lost. Laying the final sandbags onto<br />

the battery emplacement, a young sepoy he knew only as<br />

William was mortally wounded. Upon his return to the<br />

main column, Macquarie’s superior officers told him not<br />

to worry about the young Indian: he was expendable. But<br />

Macquarie had mourned when the boy died of his wounds<br />

early that following morning.<br />

Macquarie continued to scan the landscape above the<br />

tumult and his eye drifted onto the tall trees in the<br />

distance. They reminded him of Macao, where he had<br />

spent his last moments with Jane.<br />

Beautiful Jane.<br />

39<br />

The very thought of her made Macquarie step back and<br />

compose himself. It had been three years but his loneliness<br />

and depression were still with him, the hurt still sharp.<br />

When they had first arrived in Macao, Jane had seemed so<br />

joyful. Yet there had been little hope. Her doctors had<br />

recommended the voyage, assuring him that the clean,<br />

crisp sea wind would be beneficial to her consumption.<br />

Macquarie had hoped that perhaps it was the heavy<br />

Bombay air that was promoting her disease. But he had<br />

been wrong. In truth, even before they had advised them<br />

to embark the doctors probably suspected the worst.<br />

Macquarie did not resent them for lying; they were just<br />

trying to offer him a chance that she could recover. In<br />

retrospect, he was thankful that they had not told him<br />

that the consumption had already done its worst. Had he<br />

known, he might not have been able to bear her last days.<br />

He never left her bedside. He did not sleep. He missed<br />

meals. Friends urged him to go swimming or riding –<br />

anything for a few hours respite. But he could not leave<br />

Jane. Not until the night that took his love had passed.<br />

Only then had he left her side.<br />

It still hurt in his bones when he thought about her death.<br />

Most nights as he lay in bed, Macquarie wondered<br />

whether he’d ever recover. And now to his depression were<br />

added angst and frustration because he was not on the<br />

battlefield with his men. He had waited so long for this<br />

opportunity. There was little glory in what he was doing<br />

now; standing here, watching from a hill, safe from<br />

danger. He felt like a child who was not allowed to go on<br />

an adventure with his more courageous brothers. He<br />

touched the black armband on his left arm. He still<br />

couldn’t take it off. His friends had even stopped<br />

mentioning it.<br />

‘Is it my fault you’re not out there?’ Jane’s voice was soft.<br />

Although it had been three years, he could still imagine<br />

her voice perfectly. And he still heard it, always when he<br />

needed her most. He realised that if he told anyone about<br />

her visitations they’d think his mind addled. But what<br />

could he do? He never wanted her to leave.<br />

‘Of course not. I’m just ill, my dear. The doctors thought<br />

it best that I not take part.’


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

‘Then why are you filled with such anger?’<br />

It was true. As he watched his comrades win glory, waves<br />

of fury swirled and spun in his stomach. They threatened<br />

to burst out like they had that first night when he had<br />

cursed the doctors after they demanded he not lead his<br />

men into battle.<br />

‘Because … because I want to fight.’<br />

Macquarie stared into the distance and Wellesley noticed<br />

that he was preoccupied. ‘Are you sure you’re feeling well,<br />

Major? I can summon your doctors if you like.’<br />

‘I’m fine.’ Macquarie nodded absentmindedly. Wellesley<br />

was sweating profusely as Macquarie turned to him. He<br />

looked uncomfortable.<br />

‘There are some trees over …’<br />

‘ … I’m fine. I assure you.’<br />

‘Well,’ Wellesley pointed out. ‘I am most certainly not.<br />

The heat is scalding. I need to find shade before I expire.’<br />

Macquarie nodded as the Colonel left. He hadn’t really<br />

noticed the heat until Wellesley mentioned it. He tried to<br />

pick out Baird in the fighting but the smoke blocked his<br />

view, his mind wandering away again, as it often had in<br />

the years since Jane’s death. In an instant, he was back<br />

with her, on her favourite chair, as he wrote in his journal.<br />

His loose, almost illegible scrawl constantly interrupted as<br />

she asked him questions about Scotland and about the<br />

war and about whatever her young mind was interested in.<br />

She had travelled more than most people he knew. She<br />

was well educated and yet still knew very little about the<br />

world. But it was this very naivety, this innocence that<br />

Macquarie remembered and cherished. She had always<br />

believed the world a place of goodness just as she<br />

had always believed she would return to health. Even<br />

when there was no hope left, she had still seemed bright<br />

and angelic.<br />

When the sickness first struck, they had both thought she<br />

was pregnant and carrying their first child. Macquarie<br />

had been full of joy and passed an entire day writing in<br />

his journal. But his happiness soon soured into his worst<br />

fear. His sadness compounded by the fact that he had also<br />

lost the dream of a child he so desired.<br />

‘Please forgive me,’ Jane whispered from her bed once she<br />

knew of her condition.<br />

‘Of course, my love. Nothing to forgive. Nothing.’<br />

The days when she didn’t have the strength to walk or<br />

even rise from bed had been the most heart-rending. She<br />

tried so hard to prove to Lachlan that she was getting<br />

better. But the tears welled in her eyes when she didn’t<br />

have the ability to stand and Macquarie’s spirit broke<br />

every time he saw it. For months after her death, he never<br />

wrote in his journal, his thoughts too grim to be allowed<br />

to share the pages with the entries before she passed. And<br />

even if he had written, the tear stains that would have<br />

marked the journal would have meant his already hurried<br />

scrawl was even more difficult to read.<br />

Just as he was about to sink further into melancholic<br />

daydreams, an almighty crash shook him and he looked<br />

up. The artillery had finally broken through the walls of<br />

Tippoo’s castle. The shrieking English soldiers stormed<br />

the fortress, earning the glory that Macquarie and Jane<br />

had dreamed of. He would still receive wealth and earn<br />

reputation from the success of this conflict but they<br />

weren’t the things that he, or the most honourable of men<br />

in England, valued. He wasn’t gaining the glory that came<br />

with leading the charge into battle. No one had ever<br />

doubted his courage but since he had not been able to<br />

fight, this would leave its mark in years to come when<br />

people debated his involvement in the war.<br />

‘Oh yes … he was there, I think,’ they would say back in<br />

England. ‘But he didn’t take part in the storming of the<br />

castle, did he? I wonder why?’<br />

Macquarie knew this would be their response to his lack<br />

of involvement and there was not anything he could do to<br />

stop them from entertaining such thoughts. The English<br />

are honourable people, but they are also very critical.<br />

Especially to one not born into rank or wealth.<br />

‘Is it over, sir?’<br />

George ran up the hill as fast as he could, his eyes<br />

glistening with excitement. Macquarie looked down at<br />

his young servant. He was clever, especially for an Indian<br />

boy, and Macquarie was glad that he had chosen to<br />

purchase him.<br />

40


BENCHMARK<br />

Conversations with Jane continued<br />

‘I believe so,’ Macquarie whispered, so quietly that the boy<br />

was not quite certain what he had said. But out of<br />

courtesy, and also some fear, he didn’t ask the Major to<br />

repeat himself. Macquarie had never been angry with him,<br />

but George had seen him argue with others. His master’s<br />

temper was quick to begin and ferocious once released.<br />

A messenger stumbled up behind Macquarie and George,<br />

knocking the boy over out of ungainliness but also a little<br />

on purpose, showing the dominance he assumed over the<br />

small Indian boy.<br />

This infuriated Macquarie. ‘Watch your step, soldier,’ he<br />

said with calm ferocity. ‘What have you come to tell me?’<br />

Red-faced, the messenger stammered out his response,<br />

‘Ti - Tip - Tippoo has been killed, sir. The r - rebels have<br />

laid down their arms and the battle is c - concluded.’<br />

Macquarie turned and muttered to himself, ‘Victory is<br />

ours, Jane.’<br />

Only George heard him.<br />

Macquarie never got the large share of the winning spoils<br />

that he had hoped for after Serigapatam. He received only<br />

1300 pounds, almost 1000 less than what he expected.<br />

After India, he spent time in Egypt fighting under Baird<br />

for a few years, before returning to England to find a new<br />

wife.<br />

Part 2<br />

Macquarie was ordered to New South Wales in 1809 and<br />

was selected as Governor in 1810. His first six years were the<br />

most successful in the colony’s history and Macquarie’s policies<br />

towards convicts and Aboriginals were unique and liberal.<br />

But in 1816 a violent disturbance from a group of natives<br />

had forced Macquarie’s hand.<br />

He had to react to what they had done.<br />

1<br />

‘I therefore very unwillingly felt myself compelled from a<br />

paramount sense of public duty, to come to the painful<br />

resolution of chastising these hostile tribes, and to inflict<br />

terrible and exemplary punishments upon them. I have<br />

this day ordered three separate military detachments to<br />

march into the interior and remote parts of the colony, for<br />

the purpose of punishing the hostile natives, by clearing<br />

41<br />

the country of them entirely, and driving them across the<br />

mountains. In the event of the natives making the<br />

smallest show of resistance or refusing to surrender when<br />

called upon so to do, the officers commanding the<br />

military parties have been authorised to fire on them to<br />

compel them to surrender; hanging up on trees the bodies<br />

of such natives as may be killed on such occasions, in<br />

order to strike the greater terror into the survivors.’<br />

Macquarie laid down his quill, closed the leather cover of<br />

his journal and leaned back in his chair.<br />

2<br />

Macquarie stumbled through the maize fields; the vibrant<br />

yellow ears of grain pattered against his thighs and tickled<br />

his side gently. He let his arms dangle slightly so that the<br />

taut skin on his palms could glide across the silky tips of<br />

the stalks. He was not looking forward to what he was<br />

about to see. As he went further, red blotches stained the<br />

yellow of the corn and a crimson tinge seemed to fill the<br />

air. Fifty metres ahead Captain Wallis stood.<br />

‘Over here, sir.’<br />

The maize that had been brought from Europe was<br />

stained with the natives’ blood. Just as he was now stained.<br />

The irony was not lost on Macquarie.<br />

He took a deep breath, pressed his handkerchief, which<br />

was drenched with sweat from his hand, to his mouth and<br />

preceded onwards. The smell hit him well before the<br />

actual sight; it engulfed him and made it nearly<br />

impossible to move. He saw a child’s arm to his left, a<br />

woman’s dismembered corpse next to it, and through a<br />

clearing in the corn, a group of bodies, some headless and<br />

covered in flies. They were huddled together as if<br />

searching for warmth. Strangely, they seemed peaceful<br />

amidst the savagery.<br />

And for some reason, Macquarie thought of Jane.<br />

‘Their heads have been taken to Sydney to be exhibited as<br />

an example of what befalls those who break the law, sir.<br />

You made the right choice, these black savages deserved it.’<br />

‘Deserved this?’ Macquarie fumbled for words. ‘Why, in<br />

God’s name, did you take the heads?’<br />

‘You asked for severe punishment, Governor.’


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

‘Yes. But ... ’<br />

‘They killed a British family. This is what they deserved.’<br />

‘But these natives did nothing,’ Macquarie pointed at the<br />

dead women and children lying in the maize, the blood in<br />

pools around them. ‘It was a small, rebellious group of<br />

men who murdered the family. I only wanted those<br />

natives to be ...’ He ran out of words.<br />

‘You wanted an example to be set. That’s what you said.<br />

That’s what we’ve done, sir.’<br />

Macquarie turned and walked away, the sight too<br />

gruesome for him to contemplate any further. He felt the<br />

dull weight of regret fill his spine and entomb his whole<br />

body. He gazed out towards the cliff that formed the<br />

boundary to the farm. He thought he heard a griefstricken<br />

moan from over the edge, but dared not look to<br />

see if anyone was actually there.<br />

3<br />

Macquarie slouched in his chair and pushed back his<br />

silvery hair. He felt the leather upholstery and ran his<br />

hands over the red bumps, allowing his fingers to drift<br />

over the contours. It was two hours since he had returned<br />

to Government House and still his mind was preoccupied.<br />

He had hoped that getting back to his study, his most<br />

cherished room, would give him clarity and clear his<br />

thoughts. But it had not.<br />

‘George!’<br />

The servant walked in, his Indian skin almost black<br />

against the crisp white of his shirt. ‘Yes, sir?’<br />

George, whom Macquarie had ‘bought’ as a boy in<br />

Bombay, was now a man and his de facto secretary. They<br />

had been together for twenty years but their relationship<br />

remained formal - one of master and servant.<br />

‘How many … of the natives perished?’ Macquarie was<br />

barely able to form the words. He knew the answer was<br />

certain to disgust him.<br />

‘Thirteen bodies have been found, but no one has been<br />

able to get a clear view from the top of the cliff so …’<br />

George’s voice trailed off.<br />

‘So it’s more than thirteen?’<br />

‘I would only be guessing, sir.’ Macquarie shot the younger<br />

man a look. He didn’t like people talking in roundabout<br />

ways. ‘Yes. I would imagine quite a few more, Your<br />

Excellency.’<br />

‘Quite a few?’<br />

‘At least as many as have already been found. One of the<br />

soldiers said that he saw only half of the blacks escape.’<br />

‘Thank you, George.’<br />

The young man exited as Macquarie pondered his<br />

dilemma. A family of colonists dead, and their crops<br />

raided. What else could he have done? He had always<br />

been an advocate for the fair treatment of the natives, but<br />

he had been forced to action. If he had done nothing then<br />

there would no doubt have been scores of letters from<br />

settlers to Lord Bathurst, the Colonial Secretary in<br />

London. Angry words. Threats and righteous indignation.<br />

Red-faced and shocked politicians.<br />

Yes, he had acted.<br />

But every link of trust he had gained with the Aborigines<br />

was now broken. He was no longer sure if he could repair<br />

the relations he had formed with them. When he had<br />

taken the helm in New South Wales, Macquarie was<br />

aware that the natives were suspicious of him, of all white<br />

men. But his generosity, especially when compared to<br />

previous Governors, had surprised the black inhabitants.<br />

They had slowly cooperated and slowly learnt to trust him.<br />

There had been a significant decrease in violent incidents<br />

with freed settlers.<br />

And now this.<br />

A group of six Aborigines had attacked a good, Christian<br />

family. Brutally. Not even the three small children had<br />

been spared. Why?<br />

Perhaps they were simply not an intelligent race. Perhaps<br />

they were capable of behaving irrationally for no reason<br />

and without remorse. That is what Reverend Marsden<br />

preached, right from the beginning, and he was already<br />

gloating about it. Before Macquarie had become Governor,<br />

Marsden had attempted to ‘civilise’ the Aborigines but<br />

had been frustrated by their lack of interest in trying<br />

42


BENCHMARK<br />

Conversations with Jane continued<br />

to better themselves. To own a horse or a house, they did<br />

not want to own anything.<br />

‘I told you there was no hope for them,’ Marsden had said<br />

the day after the colonists were killed, his face filled with<br />

satisfaction. ‘They don’t accept responsibility or<br />

ownership. They will never be able to live alongside us.’<br />

‘I refuse to believe that! The man is a fool, an arrogant<br />

fool,’ Macquarie thought angrily, and then shook in his<br />

chair when a soft response came from the empty corner of<br />

the room.<br />

‘Calm down, Lachlan. Anger has never helped you.’<br />

Jane had not appeared to Macquarie in a long time.<br />

Before the maize field he had almost stopped thinking<br />

about her. Almost.<br />

‘I don’t know what to do, Jane. It feels like … everything’s<br />

gone backward.’<br />

‘Maybe try treating the natives as you would one of the<br />

settlers.’<br />

‘I tried that as best I could. As best as would be accepted.<br />

And look what happened.’<br />

‘Don’t lose faith. Try again.’<br />

Macquarie turned away as he heard footsteps from the<br />

hall. His new wife, Elizabeth, entered the room and stood<br />

next to him.<br />

‘It will be all right, dear,’ she said, consolingly. ‘I know<br />

how you had such hope for these natives. But we must put<br />

the issue behind us now. You know it will cause nothing<br />

but conflict with Marsden if you still try to reconcile with<br />

them.’<br />

Macquarie hummed in agreement and rested his head<br />

against his wife’s waist. She was right, but he was not sure<br />

if he agreed with her council. She was an intelligent and<br />

modern woman, and very sweet. In many ways she was<br />

similar to Jane. But she had harder facets to her character<br />

that blinded her judgement on some matters. He knew<br />

that Jane’s reaction would have been different to<br />

Elizabeth’s. Softer. She always managed to see the best in<br />

people, as she had with the natives in India. A very naïve<br />

young woman to be sure, but she had schooled Macquarie.<br />

43<br />

Ever since meeting her, he had tried to treat all people as<br />

equally as he could, however foreign the notion seemed to<br />

the world.<br />

He wondered if her innocence had rubbed off on him.<br />

4<br />

Two weeks later, as they walked through the garden,<br />

Reverend Marsden told Macquarie, ‘Your men did an<br />

exemplary job in Appin, Your Excellency.’<br />

‘I suppose they did.’<br />

Marsden did not pick up the regret in Macquarie’s voice.<br />

Marsden had invited him to his estate to discuss the<br />

colony and what had transpired at Appin. Macquarie was<br />

surprised when Marsden had asked him to visit. He had<br />

never done so before.<br />

The response to the Appin affair from the other powerful<br />

families in the colony had been just as positive as<br />

Marsden’s. They had all praised Macquarie for the acts of<br />

butchery and violence, which Captain Wallis and his men<br />

had conducted on his order. Macquarie had expected<br />

praise but was surprised by their joy. It made him so angry.<br />

At least a score of natives killed, relations shattered. The<br />

Aborigines of course no longer ventured close to the farms<br />

as they once did. How could anyone find joy in that?<br />

Macquarie took in his surroundings as he stood in the<br />

Reverend’s garden, the great eucalypts rising to his right<br />

and left, their chipped and weary bark contrasting against<br />

the pale green of the grass. The dry leaves of the towering<br />

trees cracked in the heat. Macquarie felt one in his hand.<br />

It had the same feel as an old builder’s hand, rough and<br />

warm from years of handling wooden planks and stone<br />

bricks. It was comforting.<br />

On most everything that should be done within the<br />

colony Macquarie had often held similar views to<br />

Marsden. They agreed on decisions involving the settlers,<br />

and on land distribution and religion and construction.<br />

But not about the natives. On the Aborigine they rarely<br />

agreed. Macquarie was frustrated by Marsden’s inability<br />

to treat the natives with any kind of respect. Marsden was<br />

convinced they could never be trusted. And Macquarie


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

was beginning to realise that most of the influential men<br />

in England agreed in full with the Reverend.<br />

This was a delicate issue and Macquarie was sure to tread<br />

cautiously whenever he spoke to his superior about the<br />

natives. He knew that Marsden held great influence in<br />

Britain and could put the Governor’s job in jeopardy if he<br />

saw fit.<br />

‘You’ve done a great deal while you have been here,<br />

Lachlan,’ Marsden stressed the word great. Still, there was<br />

criticism not well hidden in his tone. He could never give<br />

Macquarie the unfettered congratulations that he truly<br />

deserved. ‘But there is more to be done. You know this as<br />

well as any man.’<br />

‘There is always more to be done,’ thought Macquarie.<br />

But he held his tongue and stayed silent as Marden<br />

continued to wander through his garden.<br />

Macquarie could never admit to liking Marsden. The<br />

Reverend was a firm and stubborn old man, rarely offering<br />

praise and quick to ‘enlighten’ someone of their faults. But<br />

he had many friends in England, as most wealthy free<br />

settlers did, and would often tell Macquarie of his deep<br />

longing to return to his homeland and spend his last years<br />

with them.<br />

‘But I have too great a responsibility in this new land, to<br />

these new settlers,’ he had told Macquarie more times<br />

than he cared to remember. ‘For the good of these people,<br />

for the good of King George, I will sacrifice my own<br />

pleasures.’<br />

In truth, Marsden did little for the colonists now but still<br />

he received the accolades from England for the good work<br />

that was being accomplished in New South Wales.<br />

Accolades that Macquarie deserved. The Governor tried<br />

not to let this jealousy poison him. He was content with<br />

the certain knowledge in his heart that he was making<br />

a difference.<br />

Marsden had started to talk again and Macquarie had<br />

missed the first few words, ‘... after that crook Bligh,<br />

you’ve been a needed change for the colony. We required<br />

a stable Governor, especially for the welfare of the free<br />

settlers. They had begun to lose trust in me.’<br />

Governor Bligh had preceded Macquarie as Governor and<br />

stirred up an enormous amount of trouble. He had fought<br />

too hard for the rights of the poorer settlers and taken<br />

away the privileges of the wealthier families. Macquarie<br />

agreed that inequality in the colony was rife, but Bligh<br />

had been much too aggressive in his approach. He had<br />

alienated his superiors. Macquarie hoped not to do the<br />

same.<br />

‘When Bligh was deposed in 1808 there were calls for a<br />

sensible leader, with the right ‘values and ideals’ to come<br />

in and take over as Governor,’ Marsden continued. ‘You<br />

were the right man for the time.’<br />

As Marsden spoke unrelentingly, Macquarie remembered<br />

everything that he had done since becoming Governor.<br />

Roads were no longer uneven and crooked. The monetary<br />

system had improved tenfold, and the way of life was no<br />

longer as harsh. All these things were because of his doing,<br />

and Sydney was now a desirable place to live. But he had<br />

heard of whispers back in England that Lord Bathurst and<br />

his superiors were complaining, saying that the colony<br />

was now too prosperous.<br />

‘Try not to make things too good here, rather,’ Marsden<br />

said, ‘Lord Bathurst sent me a letter which I received a<br />

month ago. I’m surprised he did not send it to you. I know<br />

he trusts my judgement, but you are the Governor.<br />

Apparently there has been an increase in crime in England<br />

so people can come here and start a new life. We must<br />

stop this thinking. What would be the end if we did not?<br />

A land of criminals.’<br />

‘Yes, sir,’ Macquarie responded, once he realised that the<br />

other man was finally done talking. He tried to smile. ‘I’ll<br />

try not to make the colony too appealing.’<br />

‘You can’t win, even when you’re winning,’ thought<br />

Macquarie.<br />

He shook his head and looked up to the sky. He began to<br />

wonder why he had ever respected Marsden and the men<br />

of his ilk so much.<br />

44


BENCHMARK<br />

Conversations with Jane continued<br />

Part 3<br />

Macquarie’s tenure as Governor had run into its toughest<br />

period. He had been drawing criticism from influential men<br />

in both Australia and England and was getting tired of his<br />

life as Governor. In late 1819 tensions came to a head.<br />

1<br />

‘It will be impossible for us all to become a reformed<br />

people, unless time be given us to breathe, contemplate<br />

and amend … I cannot avoid saying that this country<br />

should be made the home and a HAPPY HOME to every<br />

emancipated convict who deserves it. But now my time<br />

here is done.’<br />

Macquarie in a letter to Lord Bathurst, 1821<br />

2<br />

Macquarie looked out the window. The sky blackened,<br />

sparks of electricity jumped from cloud to cloud,<br />

mirroring the frustration that grew inside him. He looked<br />

down the length of Bridge Street as far as he could see; the<br />

weather-beaten track was abandoned except for a cart that<br />

Macquarie presumed had been forgotten. He was tired of<br />

arguing. He was tired of fighting stubborn men who knew<br />

nothing of justice or acceptance. His friend, Doctor<br />

William Redfern, sat in an armchair across from him and<br />

rubbed his eyes wearily. His black coat was unbuttoned.<br />

From Macquarie’s perspective it seemed he had already<br />

accepted defeat, no longer willing to push for what he<br />

deserved, for what he wanted.<br />

‘They can’t take this position away from you, William.<br />

I’ll find a means to make sure they agree with my decision.<br />

You will be a magistrate.’<br />

‘I know you’ll try, but I don’t think even you can promise<br />

me that. These foolish men will not budge. You know it as<br />

well as I. Their sense of pride,’ Redfern stressed the word<br />

and paused, ‘it … will never allow them to concede,<br />

Lachlan.’<br />

Lord Bathurst, Reverend Samuel Marsden and many free<br />

settlers had never been supportive of freed convicts. They<br />

did not believe that these men could transform their lives,<br />

nor would they admit that the crimes many had been<br />

exiled here for were petty and not worthy of life long<br />

45<br />

penalty. Doctor Redfern had been sent to the new land<br />

after taking part in the mutiny on the HMS Standard. He<br />

had never drawn a weapon. He had merely encouraged<br />

the sailors to be independent. But the judges in the courts<br />

of England had not received this news well. Through the<br />

influence of his friends in London, Dr Redfern had barely<br />

escaped the death penalty and had been banished to the<br />

new land as punishment.<br />

Even with the knowledge of his past crime, on the journey<br />

to New South Wales, he had been awarded the position of<br />

doctor after the Captain realised his talents. He was one<br />

of only a few doctors in the new country and his skill and<br />

dedication had proved invaluable on countless occasions.<br />

He had served the state for fifteen years and only last year<br />

was nominated to become Surgeon-General. D’Arcy<br />

Wentworth had retired and Redfern had been his assistant<br />

for ten years. His appointment should have been the<br />

natural choice. A worthy man making the next logical<br />

step. But Dr Redfern had been impeded from the<br />

beginning.<br />

Macquarie had been forced to offer his friend the inferior<br />

position of magistrate as consolation for all the service he<br />

had done for the colony. But the same men, who had<br />

prevented Redfern becoming Surgeon General, were now<br />

trying to stop this selection. Marsden and Macarthur<br />

were at the forefront. The irony of Macarthur arguing<br />

against his appointment almost made Macquarie laugh.<br />

Dr Redfern had saved the life of Macarthur’s most<br />

treasured daughter, Elizabeth, from a strange form of<br />

consumption. At the time the thankful father had<br />

commented on how he hoped he could repay the doctor<br />

for what he had done. And now fourteen years later, he<br />

had forgotten that debt and was wilfully making sure that<br />

Dr Redfern did not get what he deserved. No, it was not<br />

humorous. The irony was sickening.<br />

Macquarie felt deeply sorry for his friend. They had<br />

worked together for years. Dr Redfern had delivered<br />

Macquarie’s first son. He was a loyal, honourable man<br />

who deserved more. Yet Macquarie knew he would need<br />

to fight as hard as he could to convince the others to allow<br />

Redfern to be a magistrate.


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

Macquarie smiled, his expression as confident as he could<br />

muster. ‘Do not worry, William. They will not be able to<br />

deny me.’<br />

3<br />

‘No! He is just not trustworthy, Governor.’<br />

‘But the man is perfect for the position,’ Macquarie<br />

pleaded his friend’s case to Commissioner Bigge, the man<br />

who had been sent by Lord Bathurst to report on how the<br />

New South Wales government was performing.<br />

Macquarie felt the anger he knew so well rise within him.<br />

Bigge was younger than Macquarie by twenty years and<br />

this frustrated the Governor. So young and so sure of<br />

himself. So youthful looking in truth that Macquarie had<br />

thought he was Bigge’s son when he first saw him. Not the<br />

man himself. Macquarie tried to breathe slowly.<br />

‘I’m afraid I don’t agree, Governor. He is not trustworthy.<br />

First there was the incident on the Standard that got him<br />

sent here. And then there was that incident with Bligh’s<br />

daughter …’<br />

‘What incident?’<br />

‘He … ‘consoled’ her when her father was being rightfully<br />

removed from his position. He consoled the daughter of a<br />

proven scoundrel and a liar. It demonstrates the company<br />

he surrounds himself with.’<br />

‘Just because she was Bligh’s daughter, it doesn’t mean she<br />

is undeserving of human sympathy,’ Macquarie replied<br />

incredulously.<br />

‘I think a bad seed runs in families. I’ve seen it often. If the<br />

father is a cad, it is always passed on to the children.’<br />

Macquarie was about to shout his reply when George<br />

appeared at the doorway of the study. He coughed.<br />

‘Excuse me, Your Excellency. Mrs Macquarie begs to<br />

remind you that dinner is upon us.’<br />

Elizabeth had organised one of her highly anticipated<br />

parties. Macquarie had dragged Bigge up to his study<br />

fifteen minutes earlier to discuss Redfern.<br />

Bigge smiled. ‘I think our lovely hostess is to be obeyed. I<br />

am no longer inclined to discuss this. We shall talk more<br />

on it tomorrow … if you insist.’<br />

It was Bigge’s sense of complete confidence in everything<br />

he said that infuriated Macquarie. He didn’t trust this<br />

young man, and was worried about the report that he was<br />

scheduled to give to Bathurst at the end of the year. If he<br />

wanted, Bigge could tarnish Macquarie’s reputation,<br />

something the Governor could not let happen.<br />

‘We will see, we will see,’ Macquarie muttered to himself<br />

as he followed the Commissioner downstairs to the dining<br />

room.<br />

Elizabeth hurried forward as they reached the bottom of<br />

the staircase. ‘What were you discussing? Surely nothing<br />

too serious, I hope.’<br />

‘Nothing of any importance. The issue has been resolved,’<br />

Bigge replied as he moved into the dining room, greeting<br />

with a bow some of Sydney’s elite.<br />

‘In truth, is everything fine?’ Elizabeth whispered to<br />

Macquarie, as they lingered at the foot of the stairs.<br />

She could sense her husband was angry.<br />

‘That man is a fool. He will not listen to reason.’<br />

‘Is he still opposing Doctor Redfern’s appointment?’<br />

Macquarie nodded. Elizabeth sighed and patted her<br />

husband on the shoulder, ‘Please, Lachlan, no arguments.<br />

Not tonight. For me.’<br />

He knew she had to return to her guests and he had to act<br />

as host. He smiled as she turned and gestured for one of<br />

her servants to announce that everyone should assume<br />

their seats. Dinner was prepared. Guests admired the<br />

portrait of the host on the front wall of the dining room<br />

as they walked inside.<br />

‘You look so young, Governor,’ the architect and<br />

emancipist Francis Greenway said, smiling. ‘And much<br />

leaner. When did you have this painted?’<br />

Elizabeth answered before her husband even realised the<br />

question was asked. ‘In 1805, back in London. A<br />

wonderful artist named John Opie did it on the request of<br />

my mother.’<br />

Greenway nodded and then lead his wife to her chair.<br />

Seeing that everyone had sat down Macquarie composed<br />

himself and took his place at the table.<br />

But he was not finished with Bigge.<br />

46


BENCHMARK<br />

Conversations with Jane continued<br />

4<br />

Macquarie knew there were many things that Bigge could<br />

write that would shock people in England. Macquarie’s<br />

fraternising with the natives and his ‘weak’ policies<br />

towards the convicts could certainly be exploited in<br />

Bigge’s report to denigrate the Governor’s<br />

accomplishments. Macquarie could not let this happen.<br />

He had overseen the modernisation of the colony in a way<br />

no previous Governor had even attempted. He had built<br />

the Military Hospital, and had laid down hundreds of<br />

roads throughout Sydney. He had improved the system of<br />

currency and had turned the colony into a respectable and<br />

comfortable place to live. But that might mean nothing<br />

to Bigge.<br />

He felt the anger again. The possibility of Bigge writing<br />

an unfair report swirled around his head like a thousand<br />

buzzing flies. He knew he had drunk too much wine at<br />

dinner. And now as he glanced across the table at Bigge<br />

who smiled and spoke warmly to Reverend Marsden,<br />

Macquarie wanted nothing more than to continue the<br />

conversation they had been having earlier. He knew he<br />

should not speak. And yet, he did.<br />

‘Commissioner Bigge,’ Macquarie called out. ‘I would like<br />

to confer with you once more in my study.’<br />

Bigge mumbled to Marsden and then turned. He shot the<br />

Governor a dark look as he placed his glass on the table<br />

and followed Macquarie up the stairs again to the second<br />

floor of Government House.<br />

‘There is no point arguing any more tonight, Governor. I<br />

said we shall speak of Redfern tomorrow. If that is what<br />

you wanted to discuss now then there is nothing more to<br />

be said.’<br />

Macquarie bit his tongue and allowed the rage to trickle<br />

away before responding. ‘I can assure you there is no bad<br />

seed in Dr Redfern’s case.’<br />

‘Well … I have spoken with the man on many occasions<br />

and in my opinion he always seemed …’ Bigge paused, his<br />

lips moving as if trying to find the word he was looking<br />

for floating in the air, ‘… a little off.’<br />

‘A little off?’ Macquarie felt the buzzing begin to return<br />

but once again composed himself. ‘I am not ashamed to<br />

47<br />

admit it, Mr Bigge. Dr William Redfern is one of my<br />

dearest friends, and I can again assure you that he is the<br />

most respectable and trustworthy fellow I have ever met.<br />

Bar none.’<br />

Bigge’s eyes lit up when he heard Macquarie and he took<br />

the comment as a personal offence. Unlike Macquarie,<br />

Bigge now held nothing back, ‘In my opinion this doctor<br />

does not deserve to hold any position in this colony nor in<br />

any colony within the British Empire. I cannot stop you<br />

from making this unworthy man a magistrate, as it is your<br />

obligation to choose them. But if you will not listen to my<br />

advice, do not believe that I will forget this day when I<br />

write my report for Lord Bathurst.’<br />

There it was. The threat was out.<br />

Bigge stormed out of the study and left Government<br />

House, red with indignation, before dessert and port.<br />

Macquarie felt like chasing the young man and cursing<br />

him for his inability to be fair. He almost got up to do so<br />

when a voice seemed to force him down into his chair.<br />

‘It shows weakness, Lachlan. If you want people to respect<br />

you and treat you with deference … you must change.<br />

Not pursue them … like an animal on a hunt.’<br />

Macquarie nodded. He hadn’t seen Jane since Appin.<br />

‘You won’t be able to help the colony if Bigge gets you<br />

deposed. Try to reason with him.’<br />

‘I’ve given this colony ten years of my life! I’m not sure I<br />

can give it anymore.’<br />

‘But Lachlan, it is your life.’<br />

And with that, she was gone. As quickly as she had<br />

appeared<br />

‘What happened, Lachlan? Mr Bigge is not one to forgo<br />

his port.’ Elizabeth’s face was worried as she hurried into<br />

his study, ‘You did not …’<br />

‘No, my pet. No need to worry. All is fine’<br />

5<br />

‘Congratulations, Dr Redfern. You are the newest<br />

magistrate of his Majesty’s colony, New South Wales,’


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

Macquarie offered his hand to his friend after the small<br />

ceremony had concluded.<br />

‘Thank you, Lachlan. I know how much you risked for<br />

me,’ the doctor replied as he entered the carriage<br />

Macquarie had organised to take him home.<br />

‘I did nothing. You were the best man for the position.’<br />

The Governor waved goodbye to his friend as the carriage<br />

rattled away. It was 1819 and he had just sent his third<br />

request for resignation to Lord Bathurst, the previous two<br />

having been denied over the course of the last three years.<br />

Macquarie was sure this time it would be accepted. Bigge<br />

had been trying to push him out for months. Bigge, of<br />

course, had been at the ceremony today. He had come<br />

with Reverend Marsden and John MacArthur to watch<br />

the Governor bestow on his friend a position they all<br />

swore he did not deserve. They had smiled and acted as if<br />

they believed him to be the most justifiable choice. It had<br />

amused Macquarie to listen to their congratulatory<br />

speeches as they contradicted everything they had said<br />

over the last three months.<br />

Macquarie wandered back through the maze of rooms<br />

that made up Government House. He found his way into<br />

his study and took up his well-worn journal. He let his<br />

hand run over the cover. Flipping it open, he was again<br />

surprised by the messiness of his scrawl. He read the first<br />

few lines of an entry and understood why it had been even<br />

more illegible than usual. It was written years ago, after<br />

an argument with Marsden over his treatment of the<br />

convicts. Macquarie had allowed some to be made<br />

freedmen only a year after they arrived at the colony.<br />

Marsden, of course, did not agree. He had offered the<br />

tired, oft-heard argument that men were now purposely<br />

committing petty crimes back home so they could be sent<br />

to live in the comfort of New South Wales. Comfort<br />

indeed. This land was still harsh and soon proved the<br />

worth of any man. Macquarie’s entry that night again<br />

demonstrated how passionate he had been. He truly<br />

believed everyone deserved a second chance.<br />

Macquarie looked up. Through all the turmoil and<br />

discontent, he had survived. But he looked forward now<br />

to returning home with his family. Raising his sons to be<br />

good men, and leaving them with money to start a life<br />

when they grew older.<br />

He closed his eyes, finally at peace. He had fought against<br />

men he once believed to be truthful. Men who were<br />

stubborn and could not forget traditions. He had fought<br />

for new ideas in a New World.<br />

‘And we won, Jane. We won.’<br />

Lachlan Macquarie returned to England in 1822 where a<br />

scathing report from Bigge had already sullied his reputation.<br />

As a result, the pension he received was considerably less than<br />

expected. In classic Macquarie style, he challenged the report’s<br />

findings and eventually proved that his Governorship in New<br />

South Wales had been a success.<br />

But it took a toll on him. Macquarie died in 1824, leaving<br />

behind only a relatively small sum of money to his family,<br />

and, in his lifetime, having never received the true<br />

recognition he deserved.<br />

Macquarie was the Prince of men!<br />

Australia’s pride and joy!<br />

We ne’er shall see his like again;<br />

Bring back the OLD VICEROY!<br />

Song sung at Founders’ Day celebrations in Sydney in 1828<br />

Zach Monjo<br />

Year 12 English Extension 2 Major Work<br />

48


BENCHMARK<br />

The Detective and Me<br />

This story is about Sherlock Holmes, but if you’ll forgive<br />

me I’m not going to talk about him yet. Right now I’m<br />

going to talk about Superman.<br />

In 1992 Superman died, exchanging blows with a<br />

terrifying villain by the name of Doomsday. But a year<br />

later The Man of Steel was back, standing for Truth,<br />

Justice and the American Way in his amazing four colour<br />

escapades. Granted, there was a need for a miracle<br />

regeneration pod and a few people with amnesia, but he<br />

was back! Thereby making the entire saga practically<br />

redundant. The only thing that ended up actually<br />

changing was a massive increase in issue sales for the Man<br />

of Steel. But it didn’t stop there. Since then almost every<br />

man or woman in a cape, from Batman to Green Arrow,<br />

has died only to rise from the grave.<br />

Death always leads to popularity, even in the real world.<br />

How many artists’ record sales have gone through the roof<br />

shortly after their unfortunate demise? But with fiction,<br />

readers fall into grief and despair over someone who<br />

wasn’t real. If the character was never real, who’s to say<br />

that the death was?<br />

In 1891 Sherlock Holmes died, falling off Reinbeck Falls<br />

while locked in struggle with his nemesis; Professor<br />

Moriarty. Strangely, his so-called nemesis was only<br />

introduced in the same six-page story in which he died.<br />

That was how Arthur Conan Doyle bid one of the world’s<br />

most popular characters farewell, with a six-page story<br />

and a nemesis who came out of the blue. The reader<br />

wasn’t even given the courtesy of witnessing his death; it<br />

was merely assumed that an empty cliff meant his demise.<br />

Unlike Superman, Holmes didn’t have a secret stasis pod<br />

to bring him back to life. In fact, Doyle intended for the<br />

detective to remain dead simply because he had grown<br />

tired of writing about him. Because his author didn’t have<br />

the stomach for continuing with one of the world’s most<br />

popular characters, Sherlock died.<br />

But Doyle couldn’t keep him dead. There was a public<br />

outcry against his decision to kill his own character.<br />

Meanwhile, his other works lacked the same success.<br />

Bringing Holmes back became the only option.<br />

49<br />

Fiction sometimes becomes inescapably real.<br />

***<br />

My involvement within this strange escapade was not<br />

chosen, but rather thrust upon me by unknown fates.<br />

Technically it would remain entirely voluntary. I needed<br />

to settle some affairs at the Charge Office when I<br />

discovered that we held a new prisoner within our holding<br />

cells. Upon enquiring of Sergeant Winston, the officer<br />

who processes every suspect who comes in, I found out<br />

that the man had been brought in, not only for theft, but<br />

also for interfering with police business, and intruding on<br />

a crime scene.<br />

‘What was the manner of his intervention?’ I asked.<br />

‘You’ll need to ask Williams. He wouldn’t tell me much<br />

about the case, but apparently it’s a bit of a queer one.’<br />

Winston sparked my curiosity, so I decided to find<br />

Williams and see what kind of a case he was dealing with,<br />

and the nature of this stranger’s intrusion. He proved easy<br />

enough to find. A visit to the first Circular Quay pub I<br />

came across yielded success. As decent an officer as<br />

Williams was, upon entering the tavern I was reminded of<br />

his fatal flaw. Williams sat with a drink in his hand,<br />

reasonably inebriated, bragging to an interested group of<br />

dockworkers who were feeding him a steady stream of<br />

whiskey to ensure the completion of his story. As I walked<br />

in, the stevedores began to fall silent one by one. Williams<br />

himself continued to tell his yarn until he realised the<br />

spirits of the pub had dropped. Upon seeing the cause he<br />

too fell silent.<br />

‘Sergeant McMurphy,’ said he, trying to keep his good<br />

spirits despite the obvious potential peril to his career.<br />

‘Good morning to you.’<br />

‘Constable Williams,’ I replied, as the other patrons of the<br />

bar began to retreat to darker sections of the tavern,<br />

‘might I remind you of the seventh rule of the New South<br />

Wales Police Code of Practice?’<br />

‘I am aware of the …’<br />

‘An officer must practise most complete sobriety,’ I said,<br />

quoting the wooden plaque mounted on the entrance of


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

the office. ‘One instance of drunkenness will leave an<br />

officer liable for dismissal.’<br />

Williams looked down at his feet. He pushed his drink<br />

away from him in the vain hope of hiding his<br />

misdemeanour. ‘However, you are in luck,’ said I, ‘I<br />

haven’t come to lecture you on the police code of conduct,<br />

but rather to learn a little about our friend in the holding<br />

cells.’<br />

Williams stared at me in shock, before chuckling<br />

nervously. ‘Well, sarge, it all began earlier this morning,<br />

when I was called out to Watsons Bay …’<br />

***<br />

There’s an international organisation with chapters all<br />

around the world, which pays worship to a single godlike<br />

figure. This nefarious cult has successfully infiltrated<br />

every nation, while its books and manifestos have been<br />

systematically placed into every library and bookstore on<br />

earth. In front of me lies the Sydney cell of this sinister<br />

group: the Sydney Passengers, a chapter of a much larger<br />

worldwide Sherlock Holmes enthusiast organisation.<br />

The horror.<br />

I’m here in Headland Park overlooking the old submarine<br />

base, to penetrate the seedy underworld of literary<br />

enthusiasts. They have gathered here today to celebrate<br />

the birthday of their idol. Unfortunately due to the<br />

foreboding threat of rain only six people showed up.<br />

‘Usually there are twenty to thirty people,’ a woman by<br />

the name of Katherine tells me, ‘and we’re the less<br />

neurotic ones.’<br />

The people I’m sitting with have been sleeper cells for<br />

years. Almost all of them discovered Sherlock when they<br />

were around seventeen, making some of them long time<br />

devotees. These are the ones who won’t let go. There’s<br />

something about the character of Holmes that makes<br />

them need to reach out for more, even when the pages run<br />

out. Almost every member of the Holmes society has<br />

written an adventure of his or her own. Mandy, sitting to<br />

my right, with her husband and excited dog, has even had<br />

a book published. These are the plunderers of the public<br />

domain. Like Victor Frankenstein they reach out for any<br />

piece of the Great Detective that they can get their hands<br />

on, to create a monster of their own.<br />

Except for me, of course. Looking around the group, I<br />

know what sets me apart from them. Aside from a few<br />

abridged versions I picked up when I was little, I’ve never<br />

read a Holmes story. I’m not interested in the fictional;<br />

I’m a serious journalist. Which is why I’m meeting with a<br />

literary enthusiasts group, to publish my column in a<br />

magazine for people to read with their coffee when they<br />

get sick of the heavy stuff in the real newspapers. That’s<br />

the fourth estate at work, ladies and gentleman.<br />

I did do a bit of reading before I came. Maybe I can push<br />

these people’s buttons a bit. First I dip my toe in the<br />

waters and ask a watered-down version of the unforgivable.<br />

‘Is there anything about Conan Doyle’s’ writing that you<br />

don’t like?’ A fairly simple question, but of course I need<br />

to start out with subtlety.<br />

Shock grips the group, and they are slow to come up with<br />

an answer. Some suggestions do arise. Katherine begins by<br />

mentioning the obvious, the dreaded Reichenbach Falls,<br />

which is met with a groan, followed by nods of agreement<br />

from the group while I rub my palms in excitement.<br />

Mandy then admits, ‘It was so uncharacteristic of Holmes<br />

to leave Watson alone on the cliff and then simply appear<br />

after letting Watson think he was dead for three years.’<br />

This is good, very good. These poor brainwashed fools can’t<br />

be pulled out of their state of mind in an instant. They<br />

need to gradually wake up to what they’ve submitted to.<br />

This could make a very interesting article indeed. ‘Lone<br />

Reporter Liberates Brainwashed Holmes Fans’. To hell<br />

with my editor’s desire for a ‘mild account,’ this is real life<br />

damn it!<br />

But this hope is crushed when Mandy becomes the voice<br />

of reason. ‘Really, you’re not permitted to have a grievance.<br />

The fact remains that he did it the way he did. If you’re a<br />

fan, you like what you’re reading.’<br />

The smile drops from my face. These aren’t the radicals<br />

I thought they could be, they’re fans of Arthur Conan<br />

Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes, and to them that means being<br />

a fan of Arthur Conan Doyle.<br />

50


BENCHMARK<br />

The Detective and Me continued<br />

‘You’re wrong!’ I want to tell them. ‘You could do better!<br />

Arthur Conan Doyle has let you down! Readers of the<br />

world rise up!’<br />

However, I don’t. If these people are to regain their senses,<br />

they’ll need to do so on their own terms. I merely sit and<br />

eat my cake, feeling pity for these sheep. In the distance a<br />

kookaburra cackles. The sun beats down.<br />

I get up to visit the public toilet and when I return, the<br />

subject of their discussion has moved from literature to<br />

the real world. I suppose there is still hope. As I retake my<br />

seat, their attention returns to me.<br />

‘So are you much of a Sherlock Holmes fan?’ asks an<br />

elderly woman by the name of Patricia.<br />

Now what? I don’t want to offend these people, but sooner<br />

or later they’ll realise where I stand.<br />

‘As much as I can be, without having read any of the<br />

books,’ I say.<br />

‘Oh well, that’s a shame,’ she replies.<br />

The illusion of comfort has been shattered. They’re now<br />

aware that an outsider, a potential heretic, is amongst<br />

them. I don’t have nearly enough for the column but I<br />

can’t think of a single question I actually want answered.<br />

I decide not to whip a dead horse, so I finish my cake,<br />

and then I leave.<br />

***<br />

‘As you know, these past few days brought an ungodly<br />

storm; winds, rain and lightning the like of which I’d<br />

never before experienced, but by this morning it had<br />

subsided. I arrived at the Watsons Bay Catholic Church,<br />

where around the base of its looming steeple a crowd had<br />

gathered, whipped up into a fury more powerful than that<br />

of a Pentecostal Church. The crowd had formed a circle,<br />

and in the middle of the circle lay the body of a priest in<br />

dog-collar and black surplice. He was on his back in a<br />

pool of blood. My immediate conclusion was that this<br />

man had committed suicide, an act not uncommon to the<br />

location. Now, I was lucky that none of the onlookers had<br />

moved the body, and so when I turned the body onto its<br />

side, everyone present, myself included, was shocked by<br />

the revelation.<br />

51<br />

Along the back of the body was a long sickle-shaped burn<br />

mark, scorched through his clothing and onto his back,<br />

leaving one conclusion; this priest had been struck by<br />

lightning. It was as I looked upon the body that he<br />

showed up; the man whom you are no doubt eager to<br />

meet. He was dishevelled and obviously insane. He barged<br />

his way in and, bludgeoning me with insults, demanded<br />

access to the body. I was prepared to let him off with a<br />

warning, but then as I escorted him out, I noticed the<br />

contents of his pockets. They were filled with syringes,<br />

making me recall the recent barrage of reports we had<br />

received, of a thief who had been nicking medical supplies,<br />

namely cocaine, from medical practices. Indeed, it made<br />

sense that this was the sort of desperate man who would<br />

steal to feed his own addiction. This man was guilty, not<br />

only of intervening with police business, but also theft.<br />

Thus, I had just cause to arrest him.’<br />

***<br />

I walk out of the park and through the leaf-covered<br />

footpath. This was a pointless assignment. ‘Do an article<br />

on literary societies,’ my editor instructed me. With riots,<br />

terrorist attacks and new civil wars breaking out once<br />

every five minutes, I had a choice between covering a<br />

meeting of either the Charles Dickens, Jane Austen or<br />

Sherlock Holmes Society. Then it turned out the Dickens<br />

Society was cancelling its meeting that week, so my only<br />

real option was the Sherlock Holmes Society. To hell with<br />

the landed gentry.<br />

That’s what happens when you’re a columnist, not a<br />

journalist.<br />

I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for that bastard in the red<br />

cape. People always say ‘do what you’re good at,’ and so,<br />

fresh out of university, I decided to do an article on him.<br />

‘Lies, Injustice and the American Way,’ it was titled. An<br />

eight-thousand-word rant on modern pop-culture<br />

breeding ultra-nationalism. The editor read it, laughed<br />

and hired me. Now, what I wanted was a soapbox, where<br />

I could enlighten the neo-conservative right-wing fascist<br />

media with the truth! But no, my editor had something<br />

different in mind. He stuck me on the literature column,<br />

since ‘I could write so eloquently about fiction’. But I had


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

to keep the stories inoffensive, and I couldn’t write about<br />

comics since they ‘don’t count as literature’.<br />

My job is to be the man on the inside. I get the scoop on<br />

the future of the latest young adult series, or how this<br />

year’s pop-culture-fest is looking. I look at how fan bases<br />

react to their favourite characters being killed off, what<br />

current sales tell us about the teen vampire trend and<br />

who’s suddenly getting angry over a rumour about their<br />

favourite series. And yes, during a slow week I write about<br />

literature enthusiasts’ meetings.<br />

At first it was easy. Hell, it was even kind of fun. Within<br />

my columns existed a world I controlled. I wrote about<br />

the fans, while knowing more about the business than<br />

they did. Of course, the movie was going to be made.<br />

Of course, publishers aren’t going to fund another book.<br />

Of course, some major character was going to die just to<br />

improve book sales. It’s just the way the business works.<br />

But then I realised that nothing changed. Sure, the titles<br />

were different and the fads came and went, but the stories<br />

stayed the same. That’s because the people I write about<br />

are all the same. They’re like the Sydney Passengers; they<br />

can’t let go. My columns worked and I was good at what<br />

I did. My readers didn’t seem to notice the cycles and<br />

repetition, just wanting something bland and inoffensive<br />

to digest with their morning coffee. So, like in an old<br />

Three Stooges episode, instead of passing through the<br />

door, I got wedged in.<br />

As I walk, my musings of self-pity are interrupted when<br />

I bump shoulders with a man whose presence I had barely<br />

acknowledged, and vice-versa. ‘Oh excuse me,’ he mutters.<br />

I prepare to drift back into my train of thought when he<br />

interrupts me once again, ‘This is Headland Park, isn’t it?’<br />

‘Yeah,’ I reply. Looking at him, I can recognise another<br />

poor fool. ‘Are you looking for the Sydney Passengers<br />

meeting?’<br />

‘Yes I am. Why?’<br />

‘I was with them a couple of minutes ago; they just packed<br />

up.’ They’re probably still there, but I’m doing him a<br />

favour in the long term. He looks at me curiously.<br />

‘Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t recognise you, or are you a new<br />

member?’<br />

I desperately want to tell the man that I’m actually an<br />

investigative reporter following a group of international<br />

arms smugglers posing as literary societies. It might get an<br />

interesting reaction. Then again, I would end up with a<br />

story too tempting not to publish, but provocative enough<br />

to instantly get me fired.<br />

‘Actually I’m a columnist writing about the society.’<br />

‘Oh, how’s that working out?’<br />

‘About as well as I pictured,’ I admit.<br />

‘Oh, are you the one who writes the literary reviews in<br />

The Chronicler?’<br />

‘Well, actually I don’t review the books, I just … write<br />

articles about them.’ Right now I feel like a lawyer whose<br />

client just took a swing at the judge. The career that could<br />

go nowhere but down is now taking a full-blown final<br />

nose-dive. Meanwhile I’m talking to a man without the<br />

respect to even acknowledge the name of my column<br />

(Page by Page, page 42 of the Sunday Chronicler, behind<br />

the cooking tips).<br />

The man’s eyes suddenly and inexplicably dart from side<br />

to side before he says, ‘I need to see if there’s anyone still<br />

at the meeting but I have a proposal for you.’ He decides<br />

to keep me brimming with anticipation by telling me he’ll<br />

send me an email. Then he rushes off.<br />

***<br />

When Williams had finished his tale, I was stunned. I<br />

hadn’t expected such a bizarre escapade. I left Williams<br />

and proceeded back to the charge office, before reaching<br />

the cells. I unlocked the iron door and pulled it open to<br />

find the stranger sitting upon his bed in the far corner.<br />

Williams was correct in labelling this man as dishevelled,<br />

for everything about him suggested that he had no care<br />

about his appearance. He was a tall man. However, he was<br />

pale and sickly looking, as if he were on the verge of<br />

starving. His hair and beard were short, yet scruffy and<br />

unkempt and while he had strong cheekbones and a<br />

curved hawk-like nose, his eyes betrayed any sense of<br />

strength in his character. They were bloodshot, with<br />

shrunken pupils and dark circles underneath. It seemed as<br />

if this man had been locked away for months, instead of<br />

mere hours, which would also explain the poor<br />

52


BENCHMARK<br />

The Detective and Me continued<br />

condition of his dirty brown cloak. He squinted at me<br />

with bloodshot eyes.<br />

‘Who are you?’ he murmured.<br />

‘My name is Sergeant McMurphy, and I’m here to<br />

understand why you thought it was in your place to<br />

meddle in the business of the New South Wales police.’<br />

‘I pray that you’re not all as incompetent as your associate.’<br />

As he said this I recognised his accent. ‘Are you English?’<br />

‘Yes, I am,’ he replied, ‘but right now, that’s not important.<br />

In fact, I’m not important. What’s important is this: I’m<br />

the only one who can solve this little mystery of ours.’<br />

This comment took me by surprise. So too did the next<br />

thing he said.<br />

‘Tell me, Sergeant McMurphy, would your associate by<br />

any chance be a drunkard?’<br />

‘How would you assume that?’<br />

‘You know, sandstone truly is a funny thing, I marvel at<br />

how widely you people seem to choose it over the<br />

brick-and-mortar typical of England. The peculiar thing<br />

about sandstone is its ability to trap and reflect within a<br />

room. Sounds and smells have a unique tendency to travel<br />

within it. The footsteps that signalled your exit from the<br />

front office could easily be heard less than ten minutes<br />

ago. Also, your shoes have been caked with a layer of mud<br />

and sand. Finally, I can smell the distinctive scent of beer<br />

and whisky that tends to linger around one after their<br />

departure from a pub. So I know that you have recently<br />

paid a visit to a tavern, one that is close and near the<br />

harbour, most likely in Circular Quay, and upon hearing<br />

your conversation with the sergeant at the front desk, it is<br />

apparent that you embarked upon this journey after<br />

gaining an interest in my intervention in the case of your<br />

partner.’<br />

I was left in awe. ‘How did you do that?’ I stammered.<br />

‘Elementary, my dear Sergeant,’ he replied, a smile<br />

appearing on his face.<br />

53<br />

***<br />

I’ve found myself in a very odd meeting place, faced with<br />

an equally strange proposal. We agreed to meet in the<br />

Sydney Crime Museum, built out of the old Charge<br />

Office. It still contains a preserved front office as well as a<br />

series of holding cells. My waiting was timed by a small<br />

clock mounted on the wall, and as naïve as it sounds, I<br />

couldn’t help but wonder whether this is a clock that has<br />

been ticking since the turn of the century.<br />

When the man, who had earlier introduced himself as<br />

Derrick, arrives and makes his proposition I am taken by<br />

surprise. It was reasonably simple really. I needed<br />

something to write about and he needed something to fill<br />

his apparently monumental amount of free time, and so<br />

we could easily help each other out. His proposal was that<br />

we write a Sherlock Holmes story ourselves, or to be more<br />

specific, I write his.<br />

I want to tell him that the idea is absurd. I’m a journalist<br />

(well, columnist) not a novelist! Bad enough I’ve been<br />

sidetracked into writing about fiction, now I have to<br />

actually write it.<br />

‘I’m not sure about that,’ was all I actually said.<br />

‘But you need to hear me out,’ Derrick said, ‘I’ve read<br />

some of your articles and with all due respect, they’re just<br />

not that good. I know how you could do better.’<br />

‘All right how?’ I ask, angered at this little bastard’s<br />

arrogance.<br />

‘What you need is immersion. You can’t just be some<br />

bored observer occasionally chiming in with questions;<br />

you need to be part of the story.’<br />

‘You’re asking me to defy the laws of journalism,’ I<br />

interject with my best holier-than-thou tone. ‘I’m meant<br />

to be the detached observer simply recording the events.’<br />

‘But you’re not a journalist.’ As he says this I keep on<br />

expecting some kind of a sly smile on his face, but he<br />

offers none. Hurt, I decide to just ignore the comment.<br />

For a few minutes we just sit there, neither of us able to<br />

think of anything to say. ‘Well, I’m not a novelist either.’<br />

I say, hoping my lengthened dramatic pause hasn’t<br />

disrupted the flow of the conversation.


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

‘You don’t need to be,’ Derrick says, perking up with the<br />

same enthusiasm he had at the start of the meeting. His<br />

eyes have a strange glazed look as they stare wide open at<br />

me, like when a dog pays more attention to you than he<br />

should. ‘I have the idea for the story already. Every plot<br />

point, characterisation, twist and turn is mapped out,’ he<br />

says, tapping the side of his bald head.<br />

Christ, I probably should have said something about this<br />

guy. He’s bald, I’ve already established that, but in a<br />

respectable shaved way. He has a five o’clock shadow that<br />

looks more fashionable than unkempt. Otherwise, he’s<br />

reasonably bland looking; pale skin, casual clothing and a<br />

reasonably cheap looking wristwatch. Not exactly the<br />

saviour I had always dreamed would come in and rescue<br />

my career. Unless this story will require us to infiltrate a<br />

biker ring, or actually solve a murder, this probably won’t<br />

end well.<br />

‘All you need to do is take the notes I give you and turn<br />

them into prose; that’s why I brought you here. This is<br />

where it’ll all begin.’<br />

‘But why would you want to do this?’<br />

‘Simple. I think I, that is to say we, can do it better.’<br />

‘Do what better?’<br />

‘Sherlock Holmes.’<br />

Now this is getting a bit interesting. Has this man been<br />

de-programmed?<br />

‘You do know about The Final Problem, don’t you?’<br />

‘I suppose it was a disappointment.’<br />

‘Disappointment? It was a disgrace. After five years, two<br />

books and twenty-three stories, it all ends with a<br />

showdown that we don’t even get to see.’<br />

I feel a strange apathy. All this would have been a bit<br />

useful back during the Passengers Meeting, but now I just<br />

don’t care anymore.<br />

‘But he did come back …’ In saying this, I am interrupted<br />

by Derrick’s smirk. ‘You don’t think Doyle managed to<br />

undo his mistake?’<br />

‘You can’t undo the irredeemable.’<br />

Maybe I’ll just push him a little bit. ‘So you think that<br />

you can do better?’<br />

‘No, I know we can do it better. We’ll make Sherlock the<br />

kind of character he should have been. We can make him<br />

darker, more complex; for once he won’t always land on<br />

his feet. Arthur Conan Doyle has lost his right to write<br />

Sherlock’s stories. Now it’s our turn.’<br />

‘But why don’t you just write the story yourself?’ He<br />

pauses when I ask this, trembling a little.<br />

‘Because this could be an actual story,’ he finally replies.<br />

‘You write so many articles about other writers. Now you<br />

could shift the focus onto yourself. Gonzo journalism!<br />

Where you are the story ...’<br />

Gonzo journalism. As he mentions those words, I fear my<br />

eyes will widen and my pupils will dilate like in some<br />

cartoon. Maybe I was wrong to judge him. This could<br />

revolutionise my bland and pointless column. It could<br />

actually be a story, and I could actually be a journalist.<br />

***<br />

I don’t know what overcame me that day, perhaps it was<br />

amusement, or perhaps I truly was swayed by his display<br />

of skill and intuition. Whatever the reason, I had decided<br />

to humour him and take him to the scene. We had no<br />

idea where to go now. So it seemed like there was nothing<br />

to lose.<br />

‘It was the bells.’<br />

‘What?’<br />

‘That’s the one detail that your partner failed to notice.<br />

When he interviewed the first man on the scene of the<br />

crime, a butcher by the name of Will Harris, it was<br />

revealed that the bells had rung for five minutes that<br />

morning. However, your partner chose to ignore this<br />

detail. If he was struck by lightning as you two seem to<br />

believe, why on earth would the bells ring for five<br />

minutes? The lightning might have caused a seizure but<br />

that wouldn’t have caused him to continue ringing the<br />

bell for another five minutes then take a step backwards<br />

off the steeple.’<br />

‘So what do you propose?’<br />

54


BENCHMARK<br />

The Detective and Me continued<br />

‘Well, for one thing, the nose is broken,’ the man gestured<br />

to the body where, sure enough, his nose was misshapen<br />

and of a dark blue pallor. ‘Now why would his nose by<br />

broken if he landed on his back?’<br />

‘Perhaps the bell hit him in the face after he was struck<br />

by lightning.’<br />

‘Perhaps, but what about his perspiration?’ As he said this<br />

I looked and could see a cluster of water droplets on the<br />

priest’s face. ‘Now if this was a death that occurred in an<br />

instant, why was he sweating like that? The fact that<br />

droplets remain on his face, after a fall and the pathetic<br />

manhandling that idiot gave him; shows that he must<br />

have been sweating tremendously. Granted that might<br />

have been caused by the seizure, but then we have<br />

seemingly three different causes of death that just so<br />

happened to occur simultaneously and none of which<br />

explain the ringing bells.’<br />

As I looked at the man, I realised that he had a strange<br />

way of responding to the excitement of the case. He was<br />

trembling, to the point of his shakes becoming violent.<br />

Indeed, it seemed he could not keep a single muscle still.<br />

The man walked to the body, turned it to its side, bent<br />

down and inspected the burns. He reached into his dirty<br />

coat and brought out a smudged magnifying glass. He<br />

then breathed on it and wiped it on his coat before<br />

bringing it to the burns.’<br />

As he inspected the body, his shakes became more and<br />

more violent.<br />

‘Are you all right?’ I asked.<br />

He paused, and stood up, his skinny legs wobbling as if<br />

they would not support the weight of his body.<br />

‘Don’t worry,’ he said, ‘I have a solution for this.’<br />

At this, he pulled off his shoe and ripped out the sole.<br />

Embedded within the sole was a syringe. I then realised<br />

that this was indeed, not only a man of great skills, but<br />

also of tremendous weakness.<br />

***<br />

It was weird, writing someone else’s story for them.<br />

Derrick sent me the story chunk by chunk, but I could see<br />

55<br />

it all from the beginning. It’s the basic story of<br />

redemption; the seemingly unstoppable protagonist fallen<br />

from grace, now in need of those he once scorned to help<br />

him rise back up. We start out with a middle finger to<br />

Arthur Conan Doyle. Holmes survived and rather than<br />

having all those weird and convoluted escapades in India,<br />

he goes into hiding in Australia. This seems like the<br />

perfect place to lie low, but then Holmes falls off the<br />

wagon a bit. A year has passed and now he’s suffered a<br />

complete remission to his drug addiction. Derrick’s plan<br />

merely said, ‘Holmes is introduced in a dishevelled state,<br />

stumbles into crime scene’. When I wrote this part I<br />

remembered all those Sydney Passengers and wanted to<br />

create an incarnation not even they could love; an insane<br />

drug-addict rudely intruding on police business. All the<br />

dark thoughts I felt towards all my damned readers began<br />

to flow through my fingertips. I wanted Sherlock to fall<br />

further into the abyss, commit acts that go beyond moral<br />

greyness, past the point where the reader could still define<br />

him as a hero. Derrick decided to give me the notes piece<br />

by piece, and so I still don’t know where this story is<br />

headed but I know that he wants some neat wrap-up to<br />

the story. The bad guy goes to jail, our hero gets better, he<br />

goes back to England and everyone lives happily ever after.<br />

But perhaps I can guide this story myself. I think, one way<br />

or another, Holmes’ will not leave Australia with a clear<br />

conscience.<br />

I didn’t want him in my house, and I could only imagine<br />

the kind of home Derrick lived in. So we agreed to meet<br />

in a small café, mostly empty café. Sitting here and<br />

waiting for him, I’m genuinely excited. This story’s<br />

actually getting interesting. ‘Ambitious Columnist<br />

Destroys Beloved Public Domain Character’: great<br />

headline. Then again, the actual Holmes story itself could<br />

get some attention. Rather than their usual garbage,<br />

readers could get a taste of my ‘Counter-Literature’. This<br />

could be the beginning of a new stage of my career: fiction<br />

and journalism simultaneously. The destructive, selfreflective<br />

journalist with a bone to pick with public<br />

domain fiction. No character is safe!<br />

When Derrick finally shows up, he doesn’t seem to share<br />

my enthusiasm. In fact he looks slightly nervous.


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

‘Did you get my email?’ I ask him, to which he nods.<br />

‘So you read the first few parts of the story?’<br />

He nods again, pausing and thinking about what to say.<br />

‘It’s … not exactly what I thought it would be.’<br />

‘Well, of course it’s not, I wrote it after all.’<br />

‘Yeah, I guess you did,’ he says, glancing around nervously.<br />

Sensing something wrong, I ask the question, ‘Did you<br />

like it?’<br />

He stares at me. ‘Well, like I said, it’s not what I was<br />

expecting.’ He then leans over the table and whispers to<br />

me, ‘You made him a drug addict.’<br />

‘No I didn’t. He was already an addict,’ I say, ignoring his<br />

strange desire for secrecy. Derrick looks at me confused.<br />

‘He wasn’t an addict. He took cocaine but he wasn’t an<br />

addict.’<br />

‘But you said in your own notes.’ At this I actually took<br />

them out, ‘Holmes enters scene, trying to recover from his<br />

bout with drug addiction and sees the case as potential for<br />

redemption.’<br />

‘Yes, and when I wrote that, I meant that he was actually<br />

recovering from the addiction. He was meant to enter as a<br />

man who had overcome his demons and was ready for his<br />

old adventures.’<br />

I can’t believe what I’m hearing; this man has no idea<br />

what he wants. He said he wanted Sherlock Holmes to<br />

be darker and more complex. Yet now he’s appalled by<br />

my sacrilege.<br />

He wants the harm to be heard of but not actually seen.<br />

Doesn’t he know that you’re supposed to ‘show not tell’<br />

when writing?<br />

‘But you said it yourself; you didn’t want him to land on<br />

his feet.’<br />

‘Yes, but you had him land flat on his face. Look, I’ve<br />

thought about and I know what you can do. I’ve picked<br />

some of the original stories where Sherlock actually takes<br />

cocaine. If you actually start reading some of the stories<br />

you’ll have an idea of how he deals with the drug.’<br />

‘Research? But doesn’t that defeat the purpose of …’ I’m<br />

suddenly left speechless as I realise why he wanted me to<br />

write this story.<br />

‘Do you just want another Arthur Conan Doyle story?’<br />

I ask. He looks at me with shock.<br />

‘No, of course not. That’s why we we’re doing this whole<br />

project, because we want to write a story that’s better than<br />

anything he could’ve done.’<br />

‘That’s not what I mean. Did you want this story to be one<br />

of the real ones?’ It all makes sense. He wants a story that<br />

meets his specifications. But if he writes it, he would know<br />

it isn’t real. I’ve just been the scribe for a weird fanatic.<br />

‘You’ve wanted this story for a while haven’t you? A new<br />

Sherlock mystery which followed all your personal<br />

prerequisites. But if you actually wrote it, all the joy and<br />

mystery would be gone.’ Derrick is speechless; I can see<br />

him start to shake, attracting the attention of a few<br />

couples in the café. ‘So you were prepared to lie to<br />

yourself. So what if you might have inspired the story’s<br />

creation? Even better. Then it would be a testament to the<br />

one man who actually understands Sherlock Holmes.’<br />

And he almost got away with it too.<br />

Derrick leans back into his chair, closing his eyes then<br />

glaring at me. ‘What’s wrong with that?’ he finally asks<br />

me, leaning in. ‘Let me tell you something. On 221 Baker<br />

Street there used to be a bank, and in that bank there was<br />

a man whose sole job was to reply to all the letters that<br />

they received addressed to the building’s previous<br />

occupant; you-know-who. So why did they go to all that<br />

effort? Hiring someone just to humour the poor saps who<br />

refused to accept what wasn’t real?’ Derrick leans closer<br />

and smiles. His focus is making me uncomfortable.<br />

‘Because, there was something beautiful about it. Those<br />

people who wrote the letters knew they were just sending<br />

them to a bank, but playing along was something too easy<br />

to get swept up in.’<br />

I take on his glare; leaning in and looking him in the eyes.<br />

‘But then why do it? Why all the clubs? Why all the fan<br />

fiction? Why all the dedication to a lie?’<br />

‘Because it’s a lie we can believe in. Why do you have such<br />

a problem with that?’<br />

56


BENCHMARK<br />

The Detective and Me continued<br />

I can’t believe I let this man use me for his sick, sad<br />

delusion. ‘Because I’m sick of humouring you people. If<br />

you believe in the illusion and are so desperate to preserve<br />

it, that’s fine. But I’m not going to write just to satisfy<br />

your kind. To hell with your delusions. I want you to<br />

realise that you’re not the only one with ulterior motives.’<br />

Now Derrick looks scared. I have no idea why. I’m acting<br />

perfectly reasonable. He’s the obsessive one.<br />

‘You can’t write without me. I haven’t even given you the<br />

rest of the plot.’<br />

‘Just because I don’t know where you want the story to go,<br />

doesn’t mean I can’t do something interesting with it.’<br />

‘So, what are your motives?’<br />

Why should I reveal everything to him? If he’s allowed<br />

to keep secrets, so am I. ‘To create the story I’ve wanted<br />

to read for a while, maybe the kind that you’ve always<br />

dreaded.’<br />

I get up and walk away with that mischievous grin on<br />

my face.<br />

‘But you can’t do that,’ Derrick shouts from the table,<br />

his voice echoing throughout the nearly empty café.<br />

‘It’s my story!’<br />

‘I don’t see your name on it,’ I reply, before taking<br />

my leave.<br />

***<br />

I had received a wire from Holmes demanding my<br />

presence. So I made my way to the provided address with<br />

utmost haste. The address was a hovel on the edge of the<br />

Sydney Naval Yards. I opened the door and was instantly<br />

confronted with a rank odour. Inside the barely lit room I<br />

could see Holmes lying on the floor next to a man sitting<br />

on a chair. As I approached the duo I arrived at three<br />

conclusions. First: Holmes was enslaved to his substance<br />

addiction, made apparent by the needle, which I presume<br />

was originally filled with stolen cocaine, lying on the floor<br />

next to him. Second: the man on the chair was also<br />

restrained by rope. Third: the man had been shot in the<br />

head. The sight didn’t horrify me. However, I decided to<br />

leave the room before I became nauseous. As I started to<br />

57<br />

make my way out, Holmes lifted himself off the floor.<br />

‘What happened?’ asked he, with slightly slurred speech.<br />

‘I think I should be asking you that.’<br />

‘Oh!’ said he, finally recognising me, ‘This man is a<br />

suspect in the case. I believe that the priest was murdered<br />

because of his involvement in a drug smuggling syndicate,<br />

The White Tigers. You see, the members all carry the<br />

same tattoo of their namesake. In my investigations I<br />

came across this.’ Saying this he pointed to the man’s<br />

ankle, which did indeed depict a fierce white tiger on the<br />

verge of attack. ‘So I brought him here for interrogation.’<br />

‘Then why is he dead?’<br />

‘I decided to use fear as the tool for interrogation. The<br />

trick is simple; have him believe I mean only to kill him,<br />

bring an empty gun to his head and fire. Then, pretend<br />

that the gun accidentally misfired and proceed to<br />

interrogate the suspect. In his state of terror and<br />

adrenaline he’ll be willing to divulge anything.’<br />

Already I could see why his plan had gone awry; the gun<br />

was loaded.<br />

‘Did you get anything out of him?’<br />

‘No.’<br />

‘Then why are you doing this?’<br />

***<br />

Why am I doing this?<br />

It’s stopped being fun. The more I write, the more I feel<br />

like a parody of myself. The story’s dissolved into a series<br />

of pointless incidents obstructing the actual plot as<br />

Holmes tries to solve this mystery. I’m the worst kind<br />

of writer; the kind with a short attention span. Did I<br />

mention that I decided to keep him as a drug addict?<br />

He’s also now borderline insane. After the meeting with<br />

Derrick, I felt like going further and further with the<br />

story. This story was originally being written out of spite<br />

towards Arthur Conan Doyle. Now it’s being written out<br />

of spite towards someone who’s actually alive. Well,<br />

actually it’s being written out of spite towards a general<br />

kind of person alive. The mystery itself isn’t going<br />

anywhere. Holmes ends up killing one of the witnesses


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

who fled the crime scene. So they’re back to square one.<br />

I still haven’t heard any word back from Derrick. I keep<br />

sending him segments from my story, a constant journal<br />

of my destruction. But I think Holmes has won. I can’t<br />

write a story that destroys the character, I can only write<br />

one that reflects badly on myself. Bad writer, bad story.<br />

Then one day an epiphany strikes. I check my email<br />

hoping to see an anguished reply from Derrick, possibly<br />

even a plea for me to stop my torture. All the while, I<br />

avoid the messages from my editor. By the time I finish<br />

this story, I’ll have lost my column. It will be missed.<br />

Then I stumble upon an email from my old friends, the<br />

Sydney Passengers. Maybe they caught wind of my little<br />

act of sabotage and tried to stop me. However, the email<br />

isn’t directed to me personally. It’s a newsletter for all the<br />

members, which they must have sent me for the article I<br />

should still be writing.<br />

How nice of them.<br />

The newsletter mainly just gives some reviews for new<br />

Sherlock pastiches and essays, as well as a few articles on<br />

Arthur Conan Doyle by the Passengers themselves. But<br />

something catches my eye; a little box on the last page<br />

listing notable anniversaries. The last date catches my<br />

attention. Twenty-one years ago to this day the Sydney<br />

Passengers had their only claim to fame. According to the<br />

section, they protested against the 1989 film Without a<br />

Clue, for the inexcusable crime of portraying Holmes as a<br />

bumbling idiot. My initial reaction is excitement. I can<br />

improve my assault on their beloved character by learning<br />

from those that have done it well. One more nail for their<br />

coffin. I instantly send an email to one of the members,<br />

practically demanding information about the protest.<br />

Their response doesn’t exactly meet my hopes. While the<br />

group did indeed picket outside the theatre, there was no<br />

malice behind this act. They were actually trying to<br />

parody the protests against The Last Temptation of<br />

Christ, which had occurred that same year. As Bill writes<br />

‘It was all pretty tongue in cheek’.<br />

It takes me a while to comprehend this revelation. These<br />

people actually have a sense of humour, about both<br />

themselves and the man they revere. This makes no sense.<br />

They can somehow take their passion and make a public<br />

display out of it for pure fun. That means they know it’s<br />

all just fiction. There’s no illusion present.<br />

So why does Derrick take it to a degree of humourless<br />

obsession? Then a new revelation burns in my mind,<br />

leaving me incapable of action.<br />

Why do I take it even further?<br />

Suddenly an email pops up, from Derrick. ‘Meet me at<br />

Reichenbach, midnight’ it says. He’s referring to the Gap,<br />

where Sherlock was due for his showdown with the<br />

murderer. I feel uneasy. I have an idea of what this lunatic<br />

is planning. Maybe I should just ignore him, or maybe I<br />

should call the police. But when I look at it, this is my<br />

fault. Whatever toxic obsession Derrick has, I’ve only<br />

made it worse. The standard code of practice for a<br />

journalist is objective detachment from a story. Simply<br />

report on the event, and then let it play its course. But I<br />

have a personal responsibility to Derrick, as a columnist.<br />

***<br />

He knew that confrontation was the only option, he had<br />

been called out to the hazardous cliffs, and now a<br />

showdown awaited Sherlock Holmes.<br />

***<br />

It’s a bright night when I arrive at the cliffs. The stars and<br />

moon illuminate the deserted cliff and surrounding park.<br />

A little to my left stands the lighthouse. Illuminated by<br />

ground lights, it stands as an orange obelisk casting light<br />

out onto the ocean. As I walk, the dark outline of a man<br />

in a deerstalker hat is visible. The light glow from his pipe<br />

illuminates his face. He is standing on the opposite side of<br />

the safety fence that separates the park from the cliffs.<br />

I walk up to the fence and lean on it. ‘You know, he never<br />

actually wore the hat,’ I say. He continues to stare off into<br />

the grey ocean below us, as I climb over the fence.<br />

Derrick takes the pipe out of his mouth. ‘I think it looks<br />

better this way.’<br />

I’m still tightly gripping the fence; only a few metres lie<br />

between its safety and a long fall. ‘Derrick, I’m done with<br />

the story.’ He stands at the very edge and still refuses to<br />

turn around. He wants me to come closer. I let go<br />

58


BENCHMARK<br />

The Detective and Me continued<br />

of the fence and take slow, careful steps towards the man.<br />

‘I’m sorry.’<br />

‘Don’t be. You’re an angry bitter man, and you wrote an<br />

angry bitter story,’ he says, before pausing. ‘I always<br />

wondered about Moriarty, the nemesis who only stepped in<br />

to end the detective’s life. Some of the Passengers think that<br />

he was just a cocaine-induced hallucination, others call him<br />

lazy writing on Doyle’s behalf. I think he was necessary.’<br />

‘Necessary? I thought you hated the death of Holmes.’<br />

‘Indeed I do. But Holmes needed a nemesis, someone who<br />

could truly pose a challenge, if only so that Holmes could<br />

stand victorious as the great detective that he is. Moriarty<br />

should have been the beginning, not the end. Maybe he<br />

still could be.’<br />

I had feared as much. Obsession has breached into<br />

delusion. ‘Are you the detective?’ I ask.<br />

‘No, I’m not. But what’s stopping me? A boring job? A<br />

monotonous daily routine? A series of unfulfilled dreams?<br />

There always comes a time when we accept that whatever<br />

plans we had for the future won’t come into fruition. We<br />

won’t be rock stars, or politicians or astronauts.’<br />

‘Or detectives,’ I add.<br />

‘We won’t become famous and we definitely won’t change<br />

the world. We’ll just wind up another boring face in the<br />

crowd. We’ll be ordinary.’ Derrick finally turns around<br />

and stares at me with a terrifying passion in his eyes. The<br />

face I originally thought bland now holds terrifying<br />

determination. ‘So we write stories. We put our dreams on<br />

paper in the hope that somehow they’ll become real. If<br />

there’s someone who actually has managed to reach the<br />

fruition of our dreams, we latch onto them. But that’s not<br />

real enough.’<br />

‘So that’s why we’re here. You want to pick up where he<br />

left off.’<br />

‘Imagine it like method acting,’ he says, as he starts to<br />

approach me. ‘I’ll be Sherlock, and you’ll be my nemesis.’<br />

‘For the love of God, just stop this,’ I shout. ‘You can’t live<br />

your life believing in fiction.’<br />

‘Then why do you?’ he asks.<br />

59<br />

Before I can take a moment to contemplate the insult,<br />

Derrick drops the pipe and runs towards me.<br />

***<br />

I watched, as Holmes and the killer stood on the cliff’s<br />

edge as thunder crackled around them.<br />

‘How did you know?’ the killer asked.<br />

‘Simple,’ replied Holmes. ‘When I inspected the priest’s<br />

broken nose I realised that the blood around it didn’t<br />

belong to a human but rather a cow. It had been left on<br />

your boot when you kicked the priest while he was down,<br />

breaking his nose. And who else, other than a butcher,<br />

would have encountered cow blood recently enough for it<br />

to be left on his shoe? The same butcher who had<br />

originally reported the murder, so as to scare the future<br />

victims.’ I found myself in awe of his conclusion. It all<br />

made sense and made me feel shame for doubting him.<br />

‘You knew, and yet you waited for a week to catch me?’<br />

The detective smiled, ‘I had to confirm my hypothesis.<br />

My run-in with your associate confirmed the conspiracy.<br />

He pulled out a note stained with cow’s blood. You really<br />

ought to wash after you work,’ said he.<br />

The butcher took some steps towards him, and Holmes<br />

realised his mistake. This man had a knife, and Holmes<br />

had come unprepared. He only had one option. As the<br />

butcher approached, a bright light suddenly shone upon<br />

him from the lighthouse, blinding him for a second. This<br />

second was all that was needed. The butcher made a<br />

misstep and lost his footing. In an instant he slipped and<br />

fell off the cliff. A crack was then heard, that was not<br />

thunder. The man’s fall had been broken by a low-lying<br />

rock. So too had his spine. I couldn’t believe it. Holmes<br />

had done it. He had solved the case!<br />

***<br />

So now we’ve reached the end of this strange story; well,<br />

both of them. Sherlock Holmes returned to England and,<br />

after a brief (four-page) reconciliation with Watson to<br />

account for the three years of absence, continued his<br />

adventures.<br />

Then of course, there’s the matter of Derrick.


CREATIVE WRITING<br />

When Charles Dickens wrote his Great Expectations, it<br />

originally ended with heartbreak and loneliness for Pip,<br />

the protagonist. Dickens then gave the story an alternate,<br />

and happier, ending. This ending became more popular<br />

and even Dickens would admit that he thought Pip<br />

deserved the happier ending. However, both endings exist<br />

and in the end, who’s to say which one’s real? They are<br />

both fictional, after all.<br />

I decided this time, to take a page out of Dickens’ book.<br />

Derrick died in hospital that night; I decided not to go to<br />

his funeral. Or maybe he pulled through and is currently<br />

recovering, and hopefully rethinking his life’s direction.<br />

In the end, it doesn’t really matter. This story, just like the<br />

death of Superman, and the happiness of Pip, and the<br />

death and resurrection of Sherlock Holmes, is just a<br />

collection of words on a page. That’s all you’ll ever find,<br />

and there’s no point in hoping for more. That’s the one<br />

lesson I’ve learnt from this insane experience. I’m done<br />

with writing fiction and I’m done with believing in it.<br />

Whatever you decide to take away from my strange<br />

exploits, I’ll still be here, writing every week. You can find<br />

me on page 42, tucked behind the cooking tips.<br />

Charlie Martin<br />

Year 12 English Extension 2 Major Work<br />

60


BENCHMARK<br />

61


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

The Real Inspector Hound Essay<br />

Crime writing, perhaps more than works of any other<br />

genre, is famous for the degree to which it obeys generic<br />

conventions and formulae. This makes it a particularly ripe<br />

target for subversion and parody, and Tom Stoppard’s play<br />

The Real Inspector Hound is a prime example of this. It is<br />

heavily based on The Mousetrap, a play written by the most<br />

famous of all the Golden Age writers, Agatha Christie, and<br />

has echoes of Conan Doyle’s The Hound of the Baskervilles,<br />

one of the most famous crime texts of all time. Its unique<br />

blend of parody, absurdism and existentialism is a clearly<br />

identifiable product of the tumultuous time in which it was<br />

created, and it represents both a break from and evolution<br />

of the conventions of the crime genre, combining a parody<br />

of the traditional elements of the genre with commentary<br />

on contemporary issues.<br />

In order to understand how The Real Inspector Hound<br />

subverted the crime genre, it is first necessary to<br />

understand the state of crime fiction, and society in<br />

general, at the time. When this play was written in 1968<br />

there were two established branches of crime writing;<br />

Golden Age writing, based in Britain and hard-boiled,<br />

based in USA. Other styles, such as spy fiction, were just<br />

being developed. Since this is a British play, however, it is<br />

Golden Age and, to a lesser extent, classic crime writing<br />

that is relevant. Golden Age crime writing was and is<br />

known for its highly formulaic style, specifically its<br />

stereotypical, almost cartoonish characters, its closed<br />

setting and its extremely contrived plots that hinge on a<br />

string of coincidences. Above all, it is connected with<br />

escapism and the British gentry. These features are<br />

themselves derived from classic crime fiction, which is less<br />

escapist and isolated but features even more convoluted<br />

plots. The writers of these styles, particularly Sir Arthur<br />

Conan Doyle, Agatha Christie and Dorothy L Sayers<br />

(who is herself mentioned in the play alongside the likes of<br />

Shakespeare and Dante) were towering figures in British<br />

crime fiction, and most crime fiction stuck to the<br />

guidelines these writers had laid down as closely as<br />

possible.<br />

This was, nevertheless, a time of political upheaval in the<br />

western world, particularly in Britain. Establishment<br />

values were being undermined both by mass movements<br />

and by intellectuals. Various movements were developing<br />

amongst the young, whilst postmodernism and associated<br />

schools of thought were becoming increasingly influential<br />

in artistic and literary circles. Government control of the<br />

arts, either direct or indirect, was being reduced; in<br />

Britain for example the Lord Chamberlain’s office lost the<br />

power of censorship over theatre in the same year that The<br />

Real Inspector Hound was published. This issue of change<br />

was particularly acute in Britain which, unlike Australia<br />

or the US which were enjoying great booms, was in the<br />

midst of a prolonged period of decline. In particular the<br />

loss of the empire made the traditional upper classes seem<br />

to be irrelevant anachronisms, whilst the arrival of large<br />

numbers of non-white migrants was beginning to change<br />

the social dynamic. The result of these changes was that<br />

the sort of people who played leading roles in earlier crime<br />

writing particularly the Golden Age, and the world in<br />

which they existed now seemed out-of-date. Between the<br />

wars the readership had known that such people did exist,<br />

and thus the stories were loosely connected to reality but<br />

by the 1960s texts about such people seemed to be<br />

complete fantasies, historical texts or comedies.<br />

It is into this last category that The Real Inspector Hound<br />

loosely fits. Its central premise, that of the audience<br />

becoming involved in the crime story itself, is a<br />

challenging and innovative idea that nevertheless is<br />

perhaps more suited to crime fiction, which always relied<br />

on audience involvement to some extent, in that they had<br />

to try and solve the crime, than other genres. By<br />

establishing not one but two realities which are clearly<br />

fantastical, Stoppard mocks the pretension of realism that<br />

is contained within so much of the preceding fiction of<br />

the genre; whereas Doyle has Holmes develop ridiculously<br />

complicated ‘logical’ solutions to bizarre crimes, Stoppard<br />

has a nonsensical solution to a nonsensical crime.<br />

Stoppard heightens this sense of unreality, and thus the<br />

subversion of the norms of crime fiction, by exaggerating<br />

the silliness of both the play within the play and the<br />

critics, for example Moon and Birdboot’s detailed<br />

discussion of chocolate and Mrs Drudge’s speaking style,<br />

which sometimes seems to mimic stage directions: ‘Hello,<br />

the drawing room of Lady Muldoon’s country residence<br />

one morning in early spring?’<br />

62


BENCHMARK<br />

The Real Inspector Hound Essay continued<br />

Such characters, together with the plot of the play, give it<br />

a strongly absurdist element. Absurdism was a movement<br />

that had developed during the previous 60 or so years,<br />

including movements such as Dadaism. Its incorporation<br />

into a work of crime fiction represents a substantial<br />

challenge to the conventions of the genre, which is<br />

supposedly based upon fact. By mixing these two,<br />

Stoppard shows how improbable many of the contrivances<br />

included in the average crime story actually are. Examples<br />

in this play include the amount of time it takes for the<br />

body to be discovered and ‘the strangely inaccessible<br />

house’ in which the action occurs. Of course the most<br />

absurdist aspect of the whole play is the reversal of roles<br />

between critic and actor, which itself causes the viewer to<br />

question some of the fundamental assumptions of crime<br />

genre, such as how the audience is supposed to solve the<br />

crime using only the invariably inadequate information<br />

that the author chooses to provide, or, indeed, why the<br />

audience should care.<br />

For all this subversion of the crime genre, this play also<br />

represents an evolution of the genre. For one thing, the<br />

idea of humour is more or less foreign to earlier crime<br />

texts, and yet it abounds on many levels in this text, from<br />

a parody of pretentious critics to double entendres:<br />

Cynthia: Did I hear you say you saw Felicity last night,<br />

Simon?<br />

Simon: Did I? – Ah yes, yes quite – your turn, Felicity.<br />

Felicity: I’ve had my turn, haven’t I, Simon? – now, it<br />

seems, it’s Cynthia’s turn.<br />

The influence that this humour has had can be seen in<br />

recent adaptations of pre-Stoppard texts, which introduce<br />

humour through banter between the detective and his<br />

offsider or something similar. In addition, the characters<br />

in many modern crime texts are no longer simply<br />

stereotypes, as they were in the Golden Age and classic<br />

crime fiction, but are rather parodies of stereotypes, so<br />

stereotypical that they are humorous. The Real Inspector<br />

Hound is full of such characters, and was one of the first<br />

crime texts to be so. Far more important, however, is the<br />

idea of embedding social or political criticism within a<br />

crime text. This is something which was studiously<br />

63<br />

avoided by earlier texts which were mostly just escapist<br />

fantasies, particularly the Golden Age work. In this play<br />

however, critics are portrayed in a very harsh light – they<br />

have affairs with actresses, review each other’s reviews and<br />

so on – and some of the elements of contemporary<br />

intellectual thought such as existentialism are somewhat<br />

tainted by their association with the critics, and in<br />

particular their arrogance and verbosity, especially in<br />

Moon’s rants about his relationship with Higgs and<br />

Puckeridge. The importance of this idea of commentary<br />

from within the text is evident today, when even those<br />

texts which are fairly close to being direct descendents of<br />

the Golden Age, such as Midsommer Murders, seem<br />

compelled to offer comment on contemporary issues.<br />

Thus, through texts like this play, the crime fiction genre<br />

went from being apolitical to political.<br />

The Real Inspector Hound is far removed from the typical<br />

crime text, and is remarkable for the way that by<br />

subverting the crime fiction genre it manages to<br />

simultaneously parody and evolve that genre. Through its<br />

inclusion of ridiculously stereotypical characters and a<br />

nonsensical plot, elements reflective of the dynamic time<br />

in which it was created, it parodies the strict and intricate<br />

conventions of earlier crime writing, particularly that of<br />

the Golden Age, and yet at the same time some of its<br />

innovations, such as the introduction of humour and<br />

comment on contemporary issues – in this case the<br />

pretension and egotism of critics and intellectuals in<br />

general – are hallmarks of much modern crime writing.<br />

Thus a subversion of the crime genre actually contributed<br />

to its evolution.<br />

Peter Richardson<br />

Year 12


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

An excerpt from<br />

Critical Analysis of Sufjan<br />

Stevens’ Illinois<br />

In 2005, prolific American musician, lyricist and poet<br />

Sufjan Stevens produced a successful and significant<br />

album entitled Illinois. In terms of concept, lyrical ability<br />

and musicology, Stevens excels, and Illinois is considered<br />

the greatest of all ten of his albums. As a concept album,<br />

every song is unified by, and relates to, the state of Illinois.<br />

The success of the album is testament to his versatility as a<br />

musician and poet. In fact, he wrote and provided lead<br />

vocals for every song, played 24 of the instruments heard,<br />

and even produced the album. However, his evocative,<br />

dense and allusive lyrics more than match the aural<br />

aspects of the album and give it its literary significance.<br />

The album’s great popularity is reflected in the fan<br />

phenomenon that its release sparked. Music videos of<br />

outstanding quality were produced by people unassociated<br />

with Stevens and these complemented a controversial,<br />

cheeky album cover. Illinois illustrates how a musician can<br />

be heavily influenced and affected by historical context.<br />

Stevens pulls an array of events into his web of<br />

storytelling. A number of personal and historical tales are<br />

told, including that of the complicated death of a lover,<br />

that of a notorious serial killer and those of long-forgotten<br />

ghost towns. In some pieces, Stevens adopts a melancholic,<br />

reflective tone, whilst in others an ecstatic nostalgia is<br />

expressed through joyful vocals. Stevens feels a<br />

connection to the state of Illinois, for both the pleasant<br />

and the unsavoury aspects; its great beauty and glory, but<br />

also the murders and tragic deaths. The album is a<br />

celebration, and an act of expiation. It is also an exposé of<br />

the dark side of human experience.<br />

Music critic Jimmy Newlin described the record as:<br />

‘Practically overwhelming, Illinois’ 22 tracks make for a<br />

forager’s dream come true, whether rediscovering the<br />

quiet folk confessional ‘Casimir Pulaski Day’ or getting<br />

lost in the bombast of ‘Chicago’ or ‘The Man of<br />

Metropolis steals our Hearts’. Fun as hell and damned<br />

difficult, Illinois is like a gigantic anthology of short<br />

stories you’ll never finish but leaf through year after year.’ 1<br />

1 Jimmy Newlin, Best of the Aughts Albums, last modified February 1, 2010<br />

http://www.slantmagazine.com/music/feature/best-of-the-aughts-albums<br />

Mr Newlin’s perceptive views are supported by numerous<br />

other renowned musical critics, radio stations and<br />

magazines. In 2005, Illinois was National Public Radio’s<br />

‘Best Album of 2005’. This critical response will argue that<br />

Stevens is a major poetic lyricist, musician and chronicler<br />

of his times, and will emphasise the literary and cultural<br />

significance of the artist.<br />

***<br />

‘Casimir Pulaski Day’ is a sad, quietly furious song that<br />

tells of the late winter death of Stevens’ previous girlfriend.<br />

The song offers multiple viewpoints on love, loss and<br />

religion that are sometimes conflicting, and sometimes<br />

complementary. Although Stevens chooses to omit the<br />

topic of religion from his interviews, he is Christian. It<br />

can be assumed therefore that he follows a God and a<br />

bible, both of which are referenced in several songs on<br />

Illinois including ‘Casimir Pulaski Day’. In a gutwrenching<br />

exclamation, Stevens questions God’s actions<br />

and existence at the death of his lover. Ultimately he<br />

allows aspects of his personal history to shape his creative<br />

lyrical process. However, Stevens insists he is not affected<br />

by ‘place,’ but rather by the events that occur in that place.<br />

He confirms this idea in an interview after his Detroit<br />

show. 2 He states, ‘I live in Detroit, but I don’t have a<br />

‘Detroit’ sound.’ This song is very personal, and is shown<br />

through the subjective nature of his poetry. However, the<br />

themes of heartbreak, loneliness and betrayal, portrayed<br />

through subtle and shifting perspectives, are universal.<br />

Perhaps this universality accounts for the huge popularity<br />

of the song, and the album as a whole.<br />

‘Casimir Pulaski Day’ perfectly captures the way Stevens<br />

can flaunt his lyrical proficiency in such an intimate song,<br />

and still manage to allow it to be accessible to others.<br />

Stevens wastes no time setting the sombre mood of the<br />

piece as he sings the first lyrics in a low mournful tone …<br />

‘Golden rod and the 4-H stone, the things I brought you<br />

when I found out you had cancer of the bone.’ Although<br />

Stevens’ tone then appears to shift to a quiet joy, as the<br />

song progresses a pained cynicism begins to emerge.<br />

2 TheBoss2332, Sufjan Stevens – Interview, 2007,<br />

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKctxZ68y0w<br />

64


BENCHMARK<br />

An excerpt from<br />

Critical Analysis of Sufjan Stevens’ Illinois continued<br />

The simple vocals serve to amplify the aching sense of<br />

deep mourning for a lost one. This insistent sense of loss<br />

is not all that Stevens attempts to convey to listeners: a<br />

paradoxical sense of nostalgia is also created. Stevens<br />

clearly yearns for the past while simultaneously being<br />

deeply pained by its association with his lover’s death.<br />

Stevens creates warm memories that remind him of the<br />

life he used to share with this woman. But the listener<br />

cannot help but feel there are two sides to this nostalgia …<br />

‘In the morning, at the top of the stairs, when your father<br />

found out what we did that night.’ A joyful sense of<br />

innocent mischief is followed by the bitter aftertaste that<br />

comes with the insistent idea of her death. This ability to<br />

evoke a dichotomy of conflicting emotions is typical of<br />

Stevens. As Amanda Petrusich, a senior writer for<br />

Pitchfork Magazine states, ‘Stevens has a remarkable habit<br />

of being rousing and distressing at the same time,<br />

prodding disparate emotional centres until it’s unclear<br />

whether it’s best to grab your party shoes or a box of<br />

tissues.’ 3<br />

A consistent theme that crops up in ‘Casimir Pulaski Day’<br />

is the unreliable nature of God’s protection. At first,<br />

Stevens appears to have great confidence in the<br />

unconditional protection that God offers his followers.<br />

The biblical diction of the opening chorus expresses<br />

Stevens’ faith in God, despite his knowledge of his<br />

partner’s fatal condition: ‘Oh the glory, that the lord has<br />

made.’ Stevens goes on, ‘Tuesday night at the bible study,<br />

we lift our hands, and pray over your body but nothing<br />

ever happens.’ The contrast in diction between this<br />

laconic phrase and the previous chorus expresses Stevens’<br />

sense of frustration towards God. Stevens regains his<br />

composure and clings to the comforting nostalgia of old<br />

memories. He sings, ‘I remember at Michael’s house, in<br />

the living room where you kissed my neck, and I almost<br />

touched your blouse.’ This anecdotal phrase is so strongly<br />

subjective it almost forces the listener to sympathise with<br />

3 Amanda Petrusich, Sufjan Stevens – Illinois (July 4, 2005) Pitchfork Media<br />

65<br />

Stevens’ attempt at escaping God and religion, and fleeing<br />

to the darkest, cosiest part of his mind where he can bask<br />

in the happiness of the past.<br />

Maintaining his structure of emotional alternation in the<br />

song, Stevens pushes on into the next chorus: ‘In the<br />

morning when you finally go, and the nurse runs in with<br />

her head hung low, and the cardinal hits the window.’<br />

Any listener who has experienced the death of a friend<br />

will instantly be able to empathise with Stevens. Stevens<br />

dramatises a shift from belief in God to a sense of<br />

unguided liberty. Additionally, the euphemistic phrase<br />

‘when you finally go’ paradoxically underlines the<br />

significance of the death. By attempting to make the<br />

death sound softer, in light of the memories Stevens has<br />

imparted to the audience, it feels as though her passing<br />

requires a larger surge of emotion. The audience has now<br />

become attached to this woman, and to have her suddenly<br />

‘go’ perhaps makes the listener also feel a sense of<br />

heartache. Finally, the image of the cardinal bird hitting<br />

‘the window,’ portrays a sense of shocked, static stillness.<br />

The Cardinal is also the state bird of Illinois, and in it<br />

‘hitting the window,’ it could represent the personally<br />

tragic side of Illinois that this song conveys. It is the ability<br />

to pull the audience into his songs, and convey a brutal<br />

pair of opposing perspectives that shows Stevens lyrical<br />

genius in ‘Casimir Pulaski Day.’ It is no wonder that<br />

it led to great success and popularity for the song and<br />

the album.<br />

Aidan de Lorenzo<br />

Year 12 English Extension 2 Major Work


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

Sir Philip Sidney … and other<br />

heroes of that kidney<br />

A discussion of the conflict between English and Continental<br />

influences in the work of a forgotten hero of English verse<br />

We take it entirely for granted that the greatest love poetry<br />

was written by a bunch of men in tights, from a soggy<br />

island during the reign of a Virgin Queen. For ten years<br />

at the end of Elizabeth I’s reign the sonnet enjoyed a<br />

remarkable ascendancy. Thousands of poems were written<br />

in a great literary boom that began with the publication of<br />

the first sonnet sequence in English, Sir Philip Sidney’s<br />

Astrophil and Stella, that returned English language to the<br />

top flight of European poetry. Often, the way in which an<br />

Italian invention became the mouthpiece of English genius<br />

goes unconsidered. This critical response explores the idea<br />

that the English sonnet became, not just a vehicle for the<br />

expression of love but also of national identity. While<br />

appreciating European culture and literature Sidney<br />

desired to celebrate Englishness, and the English language.<br />

This division was resolved in Astrophil and Stella by the use<br />

of European forms, techniques and ideas in English, for<br />

the distinct purpose of honouring English.<br />

Remarkably this English literary renaissance was preceded<br />

by an era in which very little great writing was produced.<br />

Indeed Muir wrote of English poetry, in his biography of<br />

Sidney 1 that ‘In spite of Wyatt, Surrey and Skelton in the<br />

first half of the century, there was a barren period between<br />

the death of Henry VIII and the accession of Elizabeth I.<br />

Indeed … little memorable verse was written during the<br />

first twenty years of Elizabeth’s reign’. Of course English<br />

had great poets in its past, notably Chaucer but by the end<br />

of the 1500s his language could no longer be read naturally<br />

by English speakers. 2 English verse was at a crossroads.<br />

In stark contrast, on the Continent there was no paucity<br />

of great poetry. Not only were there the great classical<br />

poets, Homer and Virgil, the 13th and 14th century<br />

Italians, Dante and Petrarch, but also exciting new French<br />

sonneteers, known as La Pléiade, the principal members of<br />

1 Muir, Kenneth. Sir Philip Sidney. [London]: Published for the British Council<br />

by Longmans, Green, 1960, p. 25<br />

2 Bragg, Melvyn. The Adventure of English: 500AD to 2000: The Biography of a<br />

Language. London: Hodder & Stoughton, 2003, p. 131<br />

which were Pierre de Ronsard, Joachim du Bellay and<br />

Jean-Antoine de Baïf. 3<br />

No English poet in 1580 would have failed to notice<br />

the divergence in quality of verse in French and English.<br />

It would be impossible to explain all the causes of this<br />

subsequent literary boom in a critical response. However,<br />

around 1580, a new self-confidence emerged in English<br />

poets as they overcame a strong sense of cultural cringe 4<br />

that had developed among writers of English, with the<br />

language viewed as mercantile and inferior to the<br />

Continental languages. Instead they believed that the<br />

English language could be as impressive as the English<br />

nation. 5 Divided from Europe by religion, England was<br />

nonetheless relatively peaceful, prosperous and free. Many<br />

poets wished to celebrate Englishness, to produce great<br />

works in English for the purpose of honouring the<br />

language. The English language itself was a topic for<br />

academic discussion. The English were self-conscious<br />

about their language, which, combined with the national<br />

pride of the 1580s resulted in the desire to enrich English<br />

with remarkable literature.<br />

Sidney embodied the conflict between English national<br />

pride and European cultural influence that found<br />

expression in the sonnet. He was raised at one of England’s<br />

grandest houses, Penshurst Place, Kent, and his family<br />

were aristocratic and at the very heart of the English Court<br />

and government. 6 Sidney was also stridently Protestant,<br />

as a result of his upbringing and his witnessing of the St<br />

Bartholomew’s Day Massacres in Paris 7. Indeed Sidney<br />

died in the Netherlands, at the Battle of Zutphen fighting<br />

the Spanish in the English campaign to assist Dutch<br />

Protestant independence. As Sidney lay dying from a shot<br />

in the thigh, it is said, probably apocryphally, that he<br />

3 Lagarde, André, and Laurent Michard. XVIe Siècle: Les Grands Auteurs<br />

Français Du Programme. Paris: Bordas, 1965. Print. Translated with assistance<br />

from P. Hipwell and R. Brennan<br />

4 A term first used in Philips, A. A. ‘The Cultural Cringe.’ Meanjin vol. 4 (1950)<br />

5 Bateson, F.W. English Poetry and the English Language. Clarendon Press, Oxford,<br />

1934, p. 31<br />

6 Fox Bourne, H.R. Sir Philip Sidney: Type of English Chivalry in the Elizabethan<br />

Age. London: G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 1891, p.15<br />

7 Boas, Frederick. Sir Philip Sidney, Representative Elizabethan: His Life and<br />

Writings. London: Russell & Russell, 1970, p. 23<br />

66


BENCHMARK<br />

Sir Philip Sidney … and other heroes of that kidney continued<br />

gave his water to another wounded soldier, with the words<br />

‘Thy necessity is yet greater than mine.’ 8 This story typifies<br />

the mythologizing that occurred after his death. Sidney<br />

became, in death, the very model of an English gentleman,<br />

courtier, and soldier. Spenser wrote a great elegy ‘Astrophel.<br />

A Pastorall Elegie upon the death of the most Noble and<br />

valorous Knight, Sir Philip Sidney,’ while Yeats referred<br />

to ‘our Sidney, and our perfect man’. 9<br />

Sidney was not just an English patriot and militant<br />

Protestant, he was a true Renaissance Man: An Englishman<br />

who travelled in Europe, and returned not a Europhile but<br />

nonetheless a connoisseur of Continental poetry and<br />

philosophy. 10 His deep understanding of foreign poetry<br />

emerged in Astrophil and Stella. In his journeys as a<br />

diplomat and courtier he travelled extensively in Europe.<br />

Sidney visited modern France, Germany, Austria,<br />

Hungary, Poland, and Italy. He was named after Philip II<br />

of Spain, who was his godfather. And in Venice had his<br />

portrait painted by Veronese. He met intellectuals and<br />

rulers, both Protestant, Hubert Languet and William of<br />

Orange, and Catholic, Edmund Campion and Don John<br />

of Austria. He spoke Latin, French, Italian, Spanish,<br />

Greek, and some German. 11 This poet-soldier was a<br />

remarkable pioneer for English scholarship in Renaissance<br />

Europe; his discussions of Machiavelli and Epicurean<br />

philosophy are some of the earliest in the English<br />

language. 12 Sidney was so much more than just the<br />

forerunner to modern day football hooligans, rampaging<br />

through Holland.<br />

Sidney was ideally suited to adapt the sonnet and show<br />

that English was capable of expressing the most tender of<br />

emotions. In fact he wrote in his treatise The Defence of<br />

Poesy: ‘Nature never set forth the earth in so rich tapestry<br />

as diverse poets have done; neither with so pleasant rivers,<br />

8 Greville, Fulke. The Life of the Renowned Sir Philip Sidney: 1652. Delmar, NY:<br />

Scholars’ Facs. & Repr., 1984<br />

9 Yeats, W.B. ‘In Memory of Major Robert Gregory,’ 1919<br />

10 Wilson, Mona. Astrophel and Stella. The Nonesuch Press, 1931, p. viii<br />

11 Stump, Donald. ‘History of Sidney Scholarship, Introduction: Sidney as a<br />

Rennaisance Man.’ Bibliographies at Saint Louis University. Web. 10 June <strong>2011</strong>.<br />

<br />

12 Ibid.<br />

67<br />

fruitful trees, sweet-smelling flowers, nor whatsoever else<br />

may make the too much loved earth more lovely. Her<br />

world is brazen, the poets only deliver a golden.’ 13 Any<br />

man who declares that the beauty of poetry exceeds that<br />

of the natural world is undoubtedly passionate, and he<br />

describes verse as ‘the first light-giver to ignorance, and<br />

first nurse, whose milk little by little enabled them to feed<br />

afterwards of tougher knowledges’. 14 In this important<br />

work of prose, Sidney does more than celebrate poetry,<br />

he maps out its role ‘to beautify our mother tongue …’ 15<br />

Sidney felt strongly connected to the English language,<br />

both because of its intrinsic qualities and his own sense<br />

of belonging to England. He writes in The Defence of<br />

Poesy; ‘never was the Albion nation without poetry,’ 16 and<br />

then goes on to declare English’s suitability for poetry:<br />

‘Now of versifying there are two sorts, the one ancient,<br />

the other modern: the ancient marked the quantity of<br />

each syllable … the modern, observing only number …<br />

Truly the English before any vulgar language I know,<br />

is fit for both sorts.’ 17 Here Sidney refers to the difference<br />

between quantitative and qualitative metre, while<br />

English-language poetry features stressed syllables at<br />

regular intervals, for example ‘With how sad steps, oh<br />

Moon, thou climb’st the skies,’ 18 in iambic pentameter.<br />

Lines of poetry in classical languages however are made<br />

up of feet that follow certain patterns according to syllable<br />

weight. Take as an example the first line of the Aeneid,<br />

written in dactylic hexameter:<br />

Arma virumque cano, Troiae qui primus ab oris 19<br />

Sidney describes English as suitable for poetry in both<br />

forms of metre, a flattering evaluation of the capabilities<br />

of English.<br />

13 Sidney, Philip. The Defence of Poesy. Sir Philip Sidney. Ed. Katherine<br />

Duncan-Jones. Oxford: Oxford UP, 1989, p. 216<br />

14 Ibid. at p. 213<br />

15 Ibid.<br />

16 Ibid. at p. 237<br />

17 Ibid. at p.248<br />

18 Sidney, Philip. Astrophil and Stella. Sonnet XXXI<br />

19 Vergil, the Aeneid. Book I : ‘I sing of arms and a man, who came first from<br />

Trojan shores’


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

Sidney, however, believed that English poetry had fallen<br />

on hard times, and describes the relationship between a<br />

nation and the poetry of her language: ‘that poesy, thus<br />

embraced in all other places, should find in our time<br />

a hard welcome in England, I think the very earth<br />

lamenteth it, and therefore decketh our soil with fewer<br />

laurels than it was accustomed’. 20<br />

For Sidney the lack of great modern English poetry, is a<br />

national failing the language of a great nation is worthy<br />

of great writing ‘our tongue is most fit to honour poesy,<br />

and to be honoured by poesy’. 21 However, Sidney was<br />

not advocating the writing of what we might now call<br />

patriotic or nationalistic verse. The Defence of Poesy<br />

suggests that a sense of belonging to the English nation<br />

served as a primary motivation to write poetry.<br />

As to the type of poetry he wanted to write, even the<br />

type of English he wanted to celebrate the logical model<br />

was Chaucer. Indeed Sidney writes that Chaucer ‘did<br />

excellently in his Troilus and Criseyde’. 22 Unlike Spenser he<br />

didn’t feel that modern English poetry needed to replicate<br />

13th century language. Sidney belonged to a broader<br />

European cultural tradition. Sidney would write what<br />

Stephen Fry has called the ‘Goldilocks form … the sonnet<br />

is always just right’. 23<br />

Sidney was not the first Englishman to write sonnets.<br />

Chaucer had admired the works of Petrarch 24, but in<br />

1581–2 when Sidney wrote Astrophil and Stella the form<br />

was not fashionable in England. This was despite the<br />

work of Surrey, and his contemporary Wyatt, who wrote<br />

sonnets during the reign of Henry VIII that were more or<br />

less translations from Petrarch. Before Sidney, the word<br />

‘sonnet’ often took on a wider meaning than just the strict<br />

fourteen line poem, 25 which we know today. Like<br />

20 Ibid. 13 at p. 241<br />

21 Ibid. at p. 249<br />

22 Ibid. at p. 242<br />

23 Fry, Stephen. The Ode Less Travelled: Unlocking the Poet within. New York:<br />

Gotham, 2006, p. 281<br />

24 Pearson, Lu Emily. Elizabethan Love Conventions. University of California Press,<br />

1933, p. 14<br />

25 Spiller, Michael R. G. ‘’I Am Not I’: The Sonnets of Sidney.’ The Development of<br />

the Sonnet: An Introduction. London: Routledge, 1992, p. 102<br />

Petrarch’s Il Canzoniere, Astrophil and Stella is an<br />

extended series of poems, 108 sonnets and 11 songs<br />

dedicated to one woman. Stella, the object of desire, ‘star’<br />

in Latin: Astrophil, the besotted poet is ‘star-lover’ in<br />

Greek. The sequence is semi-autobiographical, Astrophil<br />

is Sidney, while Stella is Penelope Devereux, the sister of<br />

Elizabeth’s favourite, Robert Devereux, 2nd Earl of Essex.<br />

Sidney wasn’t married at the time of writing, but Penelope<br />

Devereux was, to Robert, Lord Rich. Indeed in Sonnet<br />

XXIV Sidney plays upon Rich’s name; ‘Rich fools there<br />

be,’ in much the same way that Petrarch puns on his<br />

lover’s name Laura, who was also married. 26 The greatness<br />

of Sidney’s sonnets, Petrarchan yet original lies in their<br />

lyricism and subtle exploration of lust, virtue and beauty.<br />

They would establish the sonnet in English.<br />

The balance between Continental inspiration and<br />

celebration of Englishness is reflected in the sonnets<br />

themselves. Sidney adopts the literary features of<br />

continental sonnets and their thematic concerns, but he<br />

adapts and extends both of these elements. The very idea<br />

of a sequence of sonnets like Astrophil and Stella is pure<br />

Petrarchan, and from the very first sonnet the mimetic<br />

features are clear.<br />

Sidney adopts both the conventions and the themes<br />

of Petrarchanism but his subtle adaptation allows the<br />

development of an English poetry. Petrarch’s sonnets<br />

feature the voice of an infatuated lover, a devoted servant<br />

to the object of his desire, whose cold heart causes him<br />

pain. Petrarchanism is almost masochistic in this sense27 and so in Sonnet I of Astrophil and Stella we read ‘That<br />

she (dear she) might take some pleasure of my pain;’ but<br />

then Sidney goes further describing his predicament as<br />

‘the blackest face of woe’. This introduces the theme of<br />

love as suffering that continues in other sonnets with<br />

references like ‘my hell’ 28 and ‘Alas, have I not pain<br />

26 Sonnet V, Il Canzoniere: ‘Cosí LAUdare et REverire insegna’<br />

27 Waller, Gary F. ‘The Rewriting of Petrarch: Sidney and the Languages of<br />

Sixteenth-Century Poetry.’ Sir Philip Sidney and the Interpretation of<br />

Renaissance Culture: the Poet in His Time and in Ours: A Collection of<br />

Critical and Scholarly Essays. Ed. Michael D. Moore. London: Croom Helm,<br />

1984, p. 72<br />

28 Sidney, Philip. Astrophil and Stella. Sonnet II<br />

68


BENCHMARK<br />

Sir Philip Sidney … and other heroes of that kidney continued<br />

enough’. 29 The tone of this sonnet also captures the anguish,<br />

a hallmark of the Petrarchan poet. This is a poem about a<br />

man trying to decide upon the words to use to convince a<br />

woman that he loves her. As he describes the effect he hopes<br />

his writing will have, we can almost feel his angst.<br />

Throughout the sequence, anxiety and oscillating feelings<br />

constantly plague Astrophil. These doubts and pains seem<br />

to affect not only Astrophil, the lover, but also Sidney, the<br />

poet. In this sonnet there is frustration, not only because<br />

Stella has not yet been won, but because the poet is<br />

struggling to find the words to express his feelings. Perhaps<br />

this is why he is ‘Oft turning others’ leaves’ and attempting<br />

to find inspiration in the works of others. This elaborate<br />

Petrarchan mask of self-deprecation is for the purpose of<br />

seduction, but on another level it shows the anxiety of a<br />

poet who feels a responsibility to develop the English<br />

language.<br />

This sonnet, and twelve others in the sequence, deals<br />

self-consciously with the creation of the poem itself.<br />

This degree of meta-fiction is not found in Petrarch.<br />

Certainly some of the great Italian’s poems include<br />

writing:<br />

donna, per me vostra bellezza in rima …<br />

Più volte incominciai di scriver versi;<br />

ma la penna e la mano e l’intelletto<br />

rimaser vinti nel primier assalto. 30<br />

Sidney goes beyond just saying that Astrophil is so<br />

overcome by Stella’s beauty that he is unable to write.<br />

Rather the first sonnet is a sophisticated discussion of the<br />

difficulties of writing a sonnet, a genuinely meta-fictional<br />

piece. 31 That Sidney places this sonnet at the very<br />

beginning of the sequence suggests that he was well aware<br />

of what he was doing. His anxiety is conveyed by the<br />

29 Sidney, Philip. Astrophil and Stella. Sonnet XIV<br />

30 Sonnet XX: Lady, though your rare beauties prompt my rhyme…<br />

And oft have I the tender verse essay’d,<br />

But still in vain; pen, hand, and intellect<br />

In the first effort conquer’d are and check’d.<br />

MACGREGOR<br />

Petrarca, Francesco. ‘Sonnet XX.’ The Sonnets, Triumphs, and Other Poems of<br />

Petrarch. Ed. Thomas Campbell. Trans. Robert Guthrie MacGregor. London:<br />

G. Bell and Sons, 1879<br />

31 Ibid. 27, at p. 112<br />

69<br />

halting feeling of the poem, which is emphasised by the<br />

frequent use of punctuation, for example ‘Thus, great<br />

with child to speak, and helpless in my throes, /Biting my<br />

truant pen, beating myself for spite’. 32 In other sonnets in<br />

the sequence Sidney demonstrates a masterful command<br />

of enjambment some ten years before it was effectively<br />

utilised by English dramatists to get across a similar idea<br />

of hesitance of speech. 33<br />

The meta-fictional exploration in this sonnet runs deeper<br />

than just a description of writing a poem: the first line<br />

strikes at a central poetic question. How is it that a poet<br />

goes about ‘Loving in truth, and fain(ing) in verse my love<br />

to show’? It’s important to note that for the Elizabethans<br />

‘feigning’ did not mean pretending but rather inventing.<br />

And so, in the very first line of the sequence Sidney raises<br />

an important and difficult question for writers of love<br />

poetry. He shows that this work is not just one of the<br />

many derivative English poems that came before and after<br />

but an extension of one of Petrarch’s ideas. Sidney’s<br />

complex sense of belonging, his love of both English and<br />

Continental poetry results in the adaptation rather than<br />

imitation of a Petrarchan theme.<br />

Similarly, classical rhetorical techniques are featured in<br />

this poem, but their use is central to the establishment of<br />

an ironic tone. What follows the first line in the octet is a<br />

playful rhetorical display, Astrophil is ‘fein(ing)’ love<br />

using classical devices. The repetition of words,<br />

subjunctives and parallel phrases, for example ‘Knowledge<br />

might pity win, and pity grace obtain’: additionally<br />

alliteration, the metaphor of the book, in place of poetic<br />

knowledge, and the imagery of ‘fresh and fruitful showers’<br />

all feature as Astrophil leaps towards the volta. At this<br />

point, Astrophil seems to suggest that plain speech is the<br />

order of the day, but nonetheless the sestet features an<br />

abundance of rhetoric, including prosopopoeia, as<br />

Astrophil’s Muse speaks to him, as well as metaphors:<br />

‘nature’s child,’ and aposiopesis, the lack of a proper<br />

conclusion, in the final sentence. The final, famous line<br />

is only reached after an extensive display of classical<br />

32 Sidney, Philip. Astrophil and Stella. Sonnet I<br />

33 Ibid., p. 119


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

rhetorical technique, almost ironic in tone. This<br />

playfulness and feel for irony created the new, and<br />

distinctively English voice Sidney brought to sonnets.<br />

However, our attention is repeatedly drawn to the<br />

problem of expressing love in poetry when great poetry<br />

requires artificial constructs. Anxiety in writing is not just<br />

the result of love but Sidney’s belief that a poet owes it to<br />

his language to write well. Sidney expresses the burden of<br />

the ideas he espoused in The Defence of Poesy, and is<br />

deeply aware of his responsibility in writing.<br />

Everyone knows that a sonnet is a fourteen-line poem,<br />

with ten syllables in each line, and yet the first sonnet in<br />

one of the greatest sequences in the English language has<br />

twelve in each. A line with twelve syllables is an<br />

Alexandrine, in this case Sidney attempts iambic<br />

hexameter. Alexandrines, though quite common in<br />

English drama before Marlowe and Shakespeare, are<br />

notoriously difficult to write well in English, and seem<br />

clumsy to those of us so accustomed to the almost<br />

conversational effect of pentameter. This notoriety is clear<br />

in the works of other poets. The American James Russell<br />

Lowell called it ‘the droning old alexandrine’ 34 while<br />

Alexander Pope made his views clear more poetically<br />

in his Essay on Criticism: A needless Alexandrine ends<br />

the song ‘That, like a wounded snake, drags its slow<br />

length along’. 35<br />

Though it may be unpopular among poets in the English<br />

language, the alexandrine is French’s iambic pentameter. 36<br />

The poets of La Pléiade had established the dodecasyllable<br />

as the dominant poetic metre in French sonnets. For<br />

example Ronsard’s famous ‘Quand vous serez bien vieille,<br />

au soir, à la chandelle’. 37 Sidney’s adoption of the<br />

alexandrine in this very first sonnet, and in five<br />

subsequent poems makes clear his Continental influences,<br />

in this case not Petrarch but the French sonnet writers.<br />

Though there had been sonnets in alexandrines before,<br />

34 Lowell, James Russell. The English Poets. London. W. Scott, 1888, p. 41<br />

35 Pope, Alexander. ‘An Essay on Criticism,’ 1711, vol. ii, l. 152<br />

36 Hipwell, Peter B. ‘Alexandrine.’ Letter to Luca Moretti. 21 Mar. <strong>2011</strong><br />

37 Ronsard, Pierre du. Sonnets pour Hélène Book II: XLIII, 1578<br />

most notably those of Thomas Wyatt 38 (1503–1542), they<br />

were still unusual and certainly represented an interest in<br />

French poetic style. This sonnet and others in the<br />

sequence are rare examples of fluent English poems of this<br />

form. 39 Clearly this unusual metrical form represents the<br />

poet taking points from the finest European poems, and<br />

experimenting in English, to see if he could find success.<br />

That Sidney does is a credit to his talent, but his<br />

motivation, once again, is to write great poems in English,<br />

and to show that English was capable of the sort of poetry<br />

being produced in Europe.<br />

However throughout Astrophil and Stella, Petrarch<br />

remains Sidney’s guiding light. In particular the early<br />

sonnets are very much in harmony with Petrarch’s<br />

descriptions of Laura, for example Sonnet IX is almost an<br />

archetype of the Petrarchan blazon. In this sonnet all the<br />

traditional descriptions of a mistress’ beauty are brought<br />

out; the extended metaphor of rare goods, in place of<br />

facial features ‘alabaster pure,’ ‘Gold in the covering,’<br />

‘Red porphyr’ and ‘lock of pearl’. This sort of Petrarchan<br />

hyperbole was common in sonnets of the time and is<br />

taken straight from Il Canzoniere:<br />

‘La testa òr fino, e calda neve il vólto,<br />

ebbeno i cigli, e gli occhi eran due stelle,’ 40<br />

Sonnet CLVII<br />

In Il Canzoniere it seems that not a poem goes by without<br />

a reference to Laura’s golden hair, but then again maybe it<br />

was a rarity in thirteenth century Italy before the days of<br />

peroxide. Petrarch’s followers were no less enthusiastic in<br />

comparing their lovers to precious metals and exotic<br />

stones. You can’t help but feel that all of these stony<br />

38 Foxwell, Agnes Kate. A Study of Sir Thomas Wyatt’s Poems: Being Part I of a<br />

Thesis Approved for the Degree of Master of Arts in the University of London, June<br />

1910. London: Published for the University of London by Hodder & Stoughton,<br />

1911, p. 18<br />

39 Baum, Paul F. The Principles of English Versification. Cambridge: Harvard UP;<br />

etc., 1922, p. 85<br />

40 Fine gold her hair, her face as sunlit snow,<br />

Her brows and lashes jet, twin stars her eyes,<br />

MACGREGOR<br />

Petrarca, Francesco. ‘Sonnet XX.’ The Sonnets, Triumphs, and Other Poems of<br />

Petrarch. Ed. Thomas Campbell. Trans. Robert Guthrie MacGregor. London:<br />

G. Bell and Sons, 1879<br />

70


BENCHMARK<br />

Sir Philip Sidney … and other heroes of that kidney continued<br />

women must have been quite frightening. It seems that<br />

Cleo and Vogue did not invent unrealistic standards for<br />

women’s bodies.<br />

These aren’t the only Petrarchan ‘clichés’ that Sidney<br />

adopts and in English gives new purpose, as the<br />

Cambridge History of English Literature notes, ‘The appeals<br />

to sleep, to the nightingale, to the moon, to his bed, to his<br />

mistress’s dog, which form the staple of much of Sidney’s<br />

poetry, resemble the apostrophes of foreign sonneteers…’ 41<br />

Indeed, Sidney uses apostrophes in sixty-two sonnets,<br />

according to Spiller, far more than any other English<br />

sonneteer. However, it would be wrong to suggest that<br />

Sidney’s affection for this favourite device of Petrarch is<br />

purely derivative. Once again, Sidney extends rather than<br />

mimics a Petrarchan feature. Whereas the Italian used<br />

apostrophes to invoke great powers; Love, Death, and<br />

Laura, Sidney seems to address almost anything, as he<br />

turns from subject to subject. The effect is not the<br />

solemnity of Petrarch’s apostrophes but the frisson and<br />

emotional turbulence of a lover 42 and a poet.<br />

In these early sonnets Astrophil also abides by the<br />

Petrarchan notion that his idolised lover is not only the<br />

embodiment of beauty but also virtue. Stella’s face is<br />

‘Queen Virtue’s court’. This is an important element of the<br />

Petrarchan sonnet. Montgomery writes that ‘ethical and<br />

emotional conflict … defines Petrarchism as a system of<br />

balanced and unresolved moral tension … Dialectically<br />

the demands of desire implied the destruction of virtue.’ 43<br />

In Petrarch’s sonnets then, the male lover is a distant<br />

admirer of a beautiful and virtuous woman. His poems<br />

were written to celebrate rather than seduce. In the early<br />

sonnets of Astrophil and Stella Sidney maintains this role<br />

for Astrophil, but soon introduces an overtly sexual tone,<br />

which is not found in Petrarch.<br />

41 Ibid. 6, at p. 255<br />

42 Ibid. 25, at p.116<br />

43 Montgomery, Robert L. ‘Astrophil’s Stella and Stella’s Astrophil.’ Sir Philip<br />

Sidney and the Interpretation of Renaissance Culture: The Poet in His Time and<br />

in Ours : A Collection of Critical and Scholarly Essays. Ed. Gary F. Waller and<br />

Michael D. Moore. London: Croom Helm, 1984, p. 45<br />

71<br />

What starts as the sensual language of Sonnet XII: ‘Cupid,<br />

because thou shin’st in Stella’s eyes,/That from her locks,<br />

thy day-nets, none ‘scapes free,/That those lips swell, so<br />

full of thee they be,/That her sweet breath makes oft thy<br />

flames to rise,’ soon becomes what Katherine Duncan-<br />

Jones has called ‘lewd innuendo’. 44 The best example of<br />

this being the final line of Sonnet LXXVI when Astrophil<br />

‘Pray(s) that my sun go down with meeker beams to bed.’<br />

Here Sidney has abandoned the model of Petrarch.<br />

Instead he looks to the overt sensuality of the French<br />

writers, who were inspired by the Greek lyric poets<br />

and Ovid. 45<br />

And so when, in Sonnet LXXII the conflict between<br />

virtue and beauty, the Petrarchan conflict reaches its<br />

climax, as the poet asks ‘How virtue may best lodged<br />

in beauty be,’ Sidney’s final lines and rhyming couplet<br />

underscore his amalgamation of Petrarchan and French<br />

styles; ‘As fast thy virtue bends that love to good. /But<br />

ah, desire still cries: ‘Give me some food.’’ This tightly<br />

constructed sonnet, deals with what the Elizabethans<br />

believed to be a paradox: that virtue could reside in<br />

beauty. And so Sidney presents the Petrarchan ideal;<br />

‘those fair lines which true beauty show.’ And uses the<br />

metaphor of light to represent virtue in both the octet<br />

and the sestet, but then in the final line he introduces a<br />

new character: lust. The entire discussion is now framed<br />

cleverly in terms of desire, rather than beauty. Once again<br />

Sidney demonstrates a knowledge of both European<br />

method and matter but he combines ideas and techniques<br />

in new and clever ways, and he extends the conventions as<br />

he transfers them into English.<br />

It is interesting also to consider the rhyme schemes of the<br />

sonnets at this point because here as well Sidney adopts<br />

from the Europeans and adapts for the English language.<br />

Sonnet IX follows Sidney’s favourite scheme abba abba<br />

cdcd ee, which is found in fifty-nine or sixty sonnets (the<br />

numbers change depending upon different interpretations<br />

44 Duncan-Jones, Katherine. ‘Philip Sidney’s Toys.’ Proceedings of the British<br />

Academy, 1980. Included in Sir Philip Sidney: an Anthology of Modern Criticism.<br />

Ed. Dennis Kay. Oxford, Oxfordshire: Clarendon, 1987, p. 76<br />

45 Ibid. 25, at p. 114


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

of the sounds of words). 46 Generally, though, it can be said<br />

that Sidney’s rhyme schemes are more European than<br />

any other English sonneteer. While most of his sonnets<br />

feature the final rhyming couplet, the most celebrated<br />

development of the English sonnet, twenty-three go<br />

without. Additionally Sidney adopts the Italian octet<br />

scheme of abba abba in seventy-five sonnets (including<br />

Sonnet LXXI). This scheme was abandoned by many<br />

English sonnet writers because, as Stephen Fry writes<br />

‘While this is a breeze in Italian where every other word<br />

seems to end in -ino or -ella, it can be the very deuce in<br />

English’. 47 Sidney, is therefore the most European of the<br />

great English sonneteers at the end of the sixteenth<br />

century, combining an Italian octet, with an English<br />

sestet in the majority of cases. However, it is important<br />

to remember that Sidney did use many rhyming couplets<br />

and Astrophil and Stella does include some of the first<br />

examples of the structure we would call the<br />

Shakespearean sonnet with its rhyme scheme of abab cdcd<br />

efef gg. The most famous such sonnet in Astrophil and<br />

Stella is Sonnet XXXIX ‘Come sleep, O sleep, the certain<br />

knot of peace’. In his experimentation with rhyme<br />

schemes we can see Sidney’s place as a disciple of the<br />

Italian sonneteers, but also as an innovator, adapting this<br />

form of poetry to suit the cadences of spoken English.<br />

Perhaps the most important element that Sidney<br />

introduced to sonnet writing was a sense of playfulness.<br />

While at times Sidney achieves the sort of intensity of<br />

emotion that made Petrarch so admired among poets,<br />

in many of the sonnets we are struck by his colloquialism,<br />

irony, or even humour. Take as an example Sonnet XX,<br />

in which Sidney entreats his friends to ‘See there that boy,<br />

that murth’ring boy I say,’ and describes the wound that is<br />

his love for Stella. And yet throughout the poem a sense<br />

of energy and playfulness pervades and emerges in the<br />

repeated alliteration of ‘bloody bullet’ and polyptoton of<br />

‘Poor passenger, pass’. Or indeed the melodramatic and<br />

46 Whigam, R. G., and O. F. Emerson. Sonnet Structure in Sidney’s Astrophel and<br />

Stella Studies in Philology 18.3 (1921). University of North Carolina Press: 347-5,<br />

p. 348<br />

47 Ibid. 23, at p. 284<br />

slightly sarcastic opening line ‘Fly, fly, my friends, I have<br />

my death wound, fly.’<br />

Sidney makes references to classical figures constantly,<br />

in Astrophil and Stella. Cupid is frequently mentioned,<br />

and often the purpose of these allusions is to separate<br />

Astrophil from his love, depicting it as not something he<br />

can control, but rather an irrational entity. 48 In this sonnet<br />

Sidney takes the well-worn story of Cupid and his arrow<br />

and subverts it cleverly. Cupid is no longer the son of<br />

Venus, he is one of the urchins, who wandered the streets<br />

in Tudor London. It is this sort of clever, witty writing<br />

that gives voice to the poems and distinguishes them from<br />

the very serious Italian and French sonnets. Sidney’s<br />

fondness for irony and lightness make his poems enjoyable<br />

to read, and sometimes, if you’re in the right mood they<br />

can even be downright funny. This voice that Sidney<br />

developed was carried on by other sonnet writers,<br />

Shakespeare being the foremost example. Some have<br />

argued that the Bard’s entire sequence of sonnets is a<br />

parody of the Petrarchan tradition. Certainly Sonnet 130,<br />

‘My mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun;’ supports that<br />

interpretation. In this regard, and many others,<br />

Shakespeare owes a great debt to Sidney.<br />

Penelope Devereux’s was really the face that launched a<br />

thousand sonnets because it was after the publication of<br />

Astrophil and Stella in 1591, five years after Sidney’s death<br />

that the sonnet boom really took off. Countless poems<br />

were written, most of them derivative and unoriginal, but<br />

a very small minority were truly remarkable. Sidney was a<br />

pioneer for all writers of English sonnets. He established a<br />

standard, and showed that great sonnets could be written<br />

in English. That he would be surpassed by Shakespeare,<br />

writing in a rhyme scheme that he pioneered was, in part,<br />

a testament to the strength of the foundations that Sidney<br />

laid down. As a body of work the great English sonnets<br />

did what Sidney had hoped English poets would do, they<br />

proved that English was a valid vehicle for great<br />

48 Campbell, Marion, ‘Unending Desire: Sidney’s Reinvention of Petrarchan<br />

Form in Astrophil and Stella’ Sir Philip Sidney and the Interpretation of<br />

Renaissance Culture: The Poet in His Time and in Ours : A Collection of Critical<br />

and Scholarly Essays. Ed. Gary F. Waller and Michael D. Moore. London:<br />

Croom Helm, 1984, p. 88<br />

72


BENCHMARK<br />

Sir Philip Sidney … and other heroes of that kidney continued<br />

poetry. In truth, the sonnets did more than that; these<br />

poems gave English some of the greatest literature ever<br />

written, in any language. Furthermore, these poems gave<br />

the language, itself new forms of expression and idioms.<br />

Sidney alone gave us ‘dumb stricken,’ ‘miniature’ for a<br />

small picture, ‘conversation’ in the sense we know it and<br />

‘my better half’. 49 He was particularly fond of compound<br />

adjectives, an idea taken from the French. 50<br />

Sidney was a true Englishman, a poet with a deep sense<br />

of belonging to his nation and he had been motivated<br />

to write great works in English to demonstrate the<br />

possibilities of the English language, which he believed<br />

to be one of the great achievements of the English people.<br />

At the same time, he was an educated and well-travelled<br />

diplomat and soldier, and his fellowship with a broader<br />

European cultural tradition was an important influence.<br />

It was the confluence of these two (often contradictory)<br />

tensions that shaped his writing. As a poet, Sidney felt he<br />

could not ignore the works of the Continent, and as an<br />

English poet he felt that the future of English literature<br />

was to learn from the French and Italians, and to<br />

incorporate their forms and concerns into writings in<br />

our language.<br />

The result is the borrowing of many elements; a<br />

Petrarchan sequence, the character of the male lover, the<br />

representation of the lady, the rhythm structure of some<br />

poems, the enthusiastic descriptions of idealised beauty,<br />

the penchant for apostrophes, the rhyme schemes, the<br />

sensuality of the French, and the preoccupation with the<br />

conflict between virtue and beauty. However, what<br />

separates Sidney from the legion of English Petrarchan<br />

imitators is his superior understanding of the issues at play,<br />

and the English language, itself. Sidney takes elements of<br />

French and Italian writing and extends them, producing<br />

complex meta-fictional poems, more sophisticated than<br />

his models. He embraces an innovative rhyme scheme,<br />

perfect for English writers and a new voice, distinctly<br />

vivid, rich in irony, at times even mischievous. In some<br />

49 Ibid. 2, at p. 134<br />

50 Rowse, A.L., The Elizabethan Renaissance: The Cultural Achievement, London,<br />

Macmillan, 1972, p. 56<br />

73<br />

ways that is his greatest contribution, because this new<br />

voice resonated with poets that followed Sidney. It<br />

encapsulated something of the English tone. It made<br />

the sonnet English.<br />

Luca Moretti<br />

Year 12 English Extension 2 Major Work


LITERARY AND CULTURAL CRITICISM<br />

A selection from the<br />

<strong>2011</strong> HSC Bodies of Work<br />

74


Above<br />

Samuel Leak<br />

‘Techno Fossils’ – Sculpture<br />

Year 12<br />

75


Above<br />

Aidan de Lorenzo<br />

‘The Departure’ – Digital photography<br />

Year 12<br />

76


Left and below<br />

Joseph Hunter<br />

‘Chemical, Spiritual, Physical’ – Drawing<br />

Year 12<br />

78


79<br />

Left<br />

Alexander Young<br />

‘Tale of Two Cities’ – Digital photography:<br />

detail from book<br />

Year 12<br />

Left<br />

Daniel Scott<br />

‘Inevitable’ – Film: film still<br />

Year 12


Right<br />

Geoffrey Yates<br />

‘Soda Pop’ – Digital photography<br />

Year 12<br />

Right<br />

Jye Emdur<br />

‘Music Connection’ – Collection of works<br />

Year 12<br />

80


Above<br />

Daniel Moran<br />

‘Alibis and Open Eyes’ – Analogue photography<br />

Year 12<br />

81


BENCHMARK<br />

To what extent was Roman society concerned about the<br />

political morality of its ruling class? Discuss with reference<br />

to Gaius Verres.<br />

‘The widening chasm between the upper and the lower<br />

classes was a major reason for the decay of the political<br />

institutions of the republic and for the role played by arms<br />

and violence in settling party strife’ wrote Taylor. 1 In this<br />

essay political morality is defined as referring to the<br />

normative ethics with respect to a Government ruling its<br />

citizens, and the inference that political immorality was<br />

frequent in Rome is supported. The question will be<br />

analysed, first with regards to the broader political and<br />

legal systems in Rome and then, to the trial of Gaius<br />

Verres. This essay will show that Roman society’s concern<br />

about their rulers’ morality was minimal, both as a<br />

consequence of the nature of the institutions and because<br />

it was a mutually agreeable status quo.<br />

It was widely accepted in Rome that ‘the political system<br />

... had become corrupt. Some of Rome’s richest families<br />

were able to control the government for long periods of<br />

time using their wealth to influence the elections of<br />

senators and magistrates’. 2 Indeed during Verres’ trial<br />

Cicero spoke in depth about ‘the dishonour and disgrace<br />

that have for several years past attached to this order (of<br />

senatorial jurymen)’. 3 Bribery, extortion and cronyism<br />

were ‘commonplace,’ 4 and so it was understood and allowed<br />

that such corruption was simply a part of political life.<br />

Both the psyche and the practices of the senate were<br />

observed in the law-courts, be it Verres’ various bribes and<br />

attempted bribes of Cicero, 5 or Cicero’s proclamation<br />

about the trial of Clodius that ‘the cause of the acquittal ...<br />

was the empty pockets and the itching palms of our<br />

jurymen’. 6 These were not isolated incidents. It was<br />

well-known, and this is reflected in Cicero’s statement in<br />

Verres’ trial that ‘novi locum; video ubi se iactaturus sit<br />

1 Taylor, L.R. 1968, Party Politics in the Age of Caesar, University of California<br />

Press, Berkeley and Los Angeles, p. 2<br />

2 Ackroyd, P. 2005, Ancient Rome, Dorling Kindersley, London, p. 34<br />

3 Taylor, op. cit., p. 105, cf. Cicero, In Verrem I.49 (Hereafter referred to by speech<br />

and section.)<br />

4 Tracy, C. 2007, The Life and Times of Cicero, Mitchell Lane Publishers, USA, p.<br />

21<br />

5 Clough, A.H [ed & trans]. 1969, ‘Cicero,’ in Plutarch’s Lives Volume III, Aldine<br />

Press, London, p. 191<br />

6 Lewis, J. [ed] 2003, The Mammoth Book of How it Happened: Ancient Rome,<br />

Constable and Robinson, London, p. 77<br />

83<br />

Hortensius’. 7 The predicted defence, a utilitarian<br />

justification that ‘C. Verres propter hanc eximiam<br />

virtutem in re militari omnia quae fecit impune fecerit,’ 8<br />

excuses corruption on account of the defendant’s military<br />

accomplishments. The recognition that such an argument<br />

is standard is combined with Cicero’s description that:<br />

‘eoque adduxit eos qui erant iudicaturi vehementer ut<br />

vererentur ne, quem virum fortuna ex hostium telis<br />

eripuisset, cum sibi ipse non pepercisset, hic non ad<br />

populi Romani laudem sed ad iudicum crudelitatem<br />

videretur esse servatus’. 9 These show a grudging<br />

acknowledgement in his speech that such corruption is<br />

widespread. It is little wonder that Cowie and Heitland<br />

affirmed that ‘equitable government ... and integrity were<br />

rarely displayed by Roman officials in the provinces’. 10<br />

This view is supported by Levens, who wrote that it was<br />

‘an age when a large part of the urban proletariat lived by<br />

selling its votes to the highest bidder ... there were<br />

unlimited opportunities for plunder open to those who<br />

saw in their provincial governorship a means of recovering<br />

the expenses of their election to office, and of building up<br />

a fortune for the future’. 11 Even more significant than this<br />

basic bribery and profiteering was the fact that among the<br />

multitude of Sulla’s laws from 82–79 BC was the Lex<br />

Cornelia de pecuniis repetundis, 12 which overturned the<br />

Lex Calpurnia. 13 This new law, according to Levens,<br />

meant that ‘the dice were now loaded in favour of corrupt<br />

governors,’ 14 and reinforced the sense that the political<br />

trend of Cicero’s time was an inexorable movement<br />

towards greater corruption. This much was clear in<br />

Cicero’s first case, Pro Roscio Amerino, where ‘even<br />

though Sextus (Roscius) had an airtight alibi, Cicero<br />

knew this was a case in which the truth would be<br />

7 II.5.2<br />

8 II.5.3<br />

9 II.5.3<br />

10 Cowie, H. and Heitland, W.E. [eds] 1876, Q. Caecilium Divinatio & In C.<br />

Verrem Actio Prima, Cambridge University Press, Cambridge, p. viii<br />

11 Levens, R.G.C. [ed] 2001, Cicero: Verrine V, Bristol Classical Press, London,<br />

p.xvi<br />

12 Ibid., p. xix<br />

13 Ackroyd, op. cit., p. 44<br />

14 Levens, op. cit., p. xix


LANGUAGES<br />

practically irrelevant ... (since) Chrysogonus, a close friend<br />

of Sulla, was behind the charges against the defendant’. 15<br />

It is evident in the cases in the law courts, many of which<br />

related to governance or the ruling class, that political<br />

immorality was prevalent and, more than that, promoted<br />

in Rome since it often suited those in power.<br />

This common corruption was reported in Verres’ trial by<br />

several sources, and while it was ultimately unsuccessful,<br />

it demonstrated how such vice permeated the courts and<br />

political institutions. According to Cicero, Gaius<br />

Scribonius Curio, a friend of Verres, announced to him<br />

after Hortensius’ election as consul: ‘I hereby inform you<br />

that today’s election means your acquittal’. 16 In the same<br />

period Quintus Metellus claimed: ‘I am consul; one of my<br />

brothers is governing Sicily; the other is going to preside<br />

over the extortion court; many steps have been taken to<br />

secure that no harm can happen to Verres’. 17 Fortunately<br />

neither of these men was correct, but it is notable that<br />

most of the interest surrounding the case was concerned<br />

with the various elections of consuls, judges and other<br />

influential positions, rather than the attorneys’ cases. This<br />

is representative of widespread acceptance of the prevalent<br />

corruption in the legal system.<br />

It is also significant that there were no public prosecutions<br />

in Rome under the Leges Duodecim Tabularum, 18 and this<br />

had a considerable impact on society’s view of political<br />

corruption. It was a time when ‘the standards of honesty<br />

prevailing among Roman governors were deplorably low’ 19<br />

and ‘the prizes of empire enriched and corrupted the<br />

senators and knights, who together exploited the<br />

provinces, and at the same time impoverished the<br />

common people of Rome and Italy’. 20 The fact that it was<br />

up to individuals or groups to prosecute was a sign of<br />

Rome’s laxity in dealing with crimes, particularly of a<br />

political nature. Public prosecutions and government<br />

15 Tracy, op. cit., pp. 24-5<br />

16 Taylor, op. cit., p. 108, cf. I.19<br />

17 Ibid., p. 108, cf. I. 27<br />

18 Lewis, op. cit., p. 15<br />

19 Levens, op. cit., p. xxiv<br />

20 Taylor, op. cit., p. 4<br />

anti-corruption organisations 21 in contemporary<br />

Australian society enable a co-ordinated and effective<br />

fight against political, legal and other forms of corruption.<br />

On the other hand, Rome’s total lack of any such laws or<br />

institutions made it often difficult to deal with these<br />

issues, especially since the result of the trial was<br />

determined by participants’ relationships with the judge<br />

and jury. Furthermore, if a prosecutor lost a case, he<br />

himself was open to being charged under Lex Remmia de<br />

calumnia, 22 a type of defamation or libel charge. It was a<br />

significant deterrent against prosecutions, and the threat<br />

was particularly pertinent since the jury was expected to<br />

favour the defendant. Therefore both the lack of public<br />

prosecution and the calumnia charge were part of a system<br />

which was inherently inclined to prevent justice being<br />

done through limiting the cases which went before the<br />

courts.<br />

Conversely, the effort to provide some sort of an incentive<br />

for men to bring criminals to justice, 23 through the fact<br />

that ‘ancient criminal law, both Greek and Roman, provided<br />

for the bestowal of rewards on the successful prosecutor, 24 still<br />

created problems. This was a system which was abused in<br />

Athens and Rome alike 25 as barristers sought to undertake<br />

as many cases as they could in an attempt to climb higher<br />

and higher up the cursus honorum through their successful<br />

prosecutions. This shows a blatant disregard for the value<br />

of justice itself. Instead, the process was commercialised,<br />

since monetary rewards were common, and politicised.<br />

These incentives for bringing a prosecution illustrate<br />

Rome’s indifference towards the political morality of its<br />

ruling class, and its tolerance of that class constantly<br />

seeking personal rewards, often against the good of<br />

the State.<br />

Cicero stood to gain such a great deal from the trial of<br />

Verres, that it does not seem at all unreasonable to suggest<br />

that he undertook the case, not for any particular<br />

21 Such as the NSW Independent Commission Against Corruption (ICAC) and<br />

the Federal Corruption and Crime Commission (CCC)<br />

22 Taylor, op. cit., p. 113<br />

23 Apart from the simple wish to right wrongs that have been suffered<br />

24 Taylor, op. cit., p. 112<br />

25 Ibid., p. 112<br />

84


BENCHMARK<br />

To what extent was Roman society concerned about the<br />

political morality of its ruling class? Discuss with reference<br />

to Gaius Verres. continued<br />

love of political morality or desire to see justice prevail,<br />

but simply for his own personal profit. Firstly, in 70BC,<br />

the year of the trial, Cicero was campaigning to be elected<br />

aedile, 26 and Taylor argues that ‘this was a crucial time<br />

in the career of Cicero, and it must be admitted that he<br />

would not have taken the case if he had not been<br />

convinced that it would further his career’. 27 This was his<br />

first speech as prosecutor, 28 and was a highly publicised<br />

and well-attended trial since it was held in August, the<br />

same time as both the elections and votive games put on<br />

by Pompey. 29 Having previously served as quaestor in the<br />

small Sicilian town of Lilybaeum, 30 Cicero was<br />

disappointed by his lack of recognition, 31 so the trial,<br />

building on his earlier success defending Roscius, put<br />

him firmly in the public eye, and this was reflected in<br />

his election as aedile. 32<br />

Yet Cicero had far more to gain than just an election as<br />

aedile: he would gain Verres’ praetorian rank in the senate<br />

if successful in his prosecution. 33 This was not merely to<br />

increase his prestige, although this was a significant part,<br />

since he was given the privilege of wearing the toga<br />

praetexta and joining the praetorii at public festivals. 34<br />

Furthermore, Cicero was also given considerable actual<br />

power by his promotion. When the consul presiding in<br />

the senate put forth a motion, he called firstly for men of<br />

consular rank, and next those of praetorian rank, and, due<br />

to lack of time, senators of lower rank rarely had a chance<br />

to speak. 35 This meant that after the trial Cicero gained<br />

great influence in the senate as his voice was far more<br />

prominent, and he was able to make the most of his<br />

oratory in that forum.<br />

26 Forsyth, F. 2003, Cicero: Defender of the Republic, Rosen Publishing Group,<br />

New York, p. 45<br />

27 Taylor, op. cit., p. 102<br />

28 Ibid., p. 102<br />

29 Taylor, op. cit., p. 109<br />

30 Clough, op. cit., p. 190<br />

31 Forsyth, op. cit., p. 44<br />

32 Taylor, op. cit., p. 108<br />

33 Taylor, op. cit., p. 113<br />

34 Ibid., p. 113<br />

35 Ibid., p. 113<br />

85<br />

Cicero’s third benefit from undertaking the case was that<br />

he supplanted Hortensius as the leader of the bar, ending<br />

the latter’s ‘dominatio regnumque iudiciorum’. 36 This<br />

further enhanced Cicero’s reputation, and made him the<br />

most sought-out barrister in Rome, continually<br />

approached by equites and senators alike to aid their<br />

defence or prosecution. 37 Furthermore, Hortensius himself<br />

recognised his decline, and when they later worked<br />

together on the same side, he conceded to Cicero the<br />

honour of delivering the peroratio, the crucial summary<br />

speech in a case. 38 All these benefits for Cicero helped him<br />

to become the only novus of his generation to be elected<br />

consul. 39 Therefore, it certainly seems as though Cicero<br />

used the trial of Verres simply as a means to an end, a way<br />

forward for him to gain greater fame and power. It<br />

appears evident that Cicero, like so many Romans, was<br />

not concerned so much with Verres’ actions and the<br />

ruinous ethos of political immorality. Rather, he was<br />

focused entirely on his own career: for him the case was<br />

not about justice being done, it was about ‘making a<br />

breach in the fortress of the nobility and preparing the<br />

way for the entrance of his unknown name in the august<br />

annals of Roman consuls’. 40<br />

The view is enhanced by the knowledge that Cicero<br />

himself took a bribe from Verres during the case. Verres’<br />

bribery did not merely go out to the jury, but also to<br />

Cicero, whose suspected acceptance was completely<br />

hypocritical of his apparently moral and honourable<br />

intentions. It was Verres himself who suggested that he<br />

should keep for himself the profits from his first year in<br />

office and use the next two, more lucrative years for<br />

bribing purposes in a trial, 41 and this is exactly what<br />

happened. Plutarch recounted that ‘Cicero, who set the<br />

fine at seventy-five myriads, lay under suspicion of being<br />

corrupted by bribery to lessen the sum. 42 Taylor wrote that<br />

36 I.38<br />

37 Taylor, op. cit., p. 116<br />

38 Ibid., p. 114<br />

39 Ibid., p. 118. ie. The only man of his generation whose father was not elected<br />

consul to be elected consul himself.<br />

40 Ibid., p. 118<br />

41 Levens, op. cit., p. xx<br />

42 Clough, op. cit., p. 191


LANGUAGES<br />

‘Cicero was awarded the role of accuser ... at this time<br />

Verres tried to bribe him, but Cicero resisted ... (but) in<br />

fixing the fine ... Cicero was bribed to make it low’. 43 It is<br />

a great irony that in an extortion court the prosecutor was<br />

successfully bribed, but such was the Romans’ lack of<br />

concern about corruption.<br />

Verres himself typified the rampant corruption of so many<br />

Romans in the ruling class. Cicero highlighted, among<br />

other wicked acts, how ‘in Sicilia sacra profanaque omnia<br />

et privatim et publice spoliarit’. 44 The repetition of the<br />

plosive sounds highlights his contempt, while the<br />

elaborate rhetoric emphasises the multitude of crimes in:<br />

‘tu quos servos arma capere et bellum facere in Sicilia<br />

voluisse cognoras et de consilii sententia iudicaras, hos ad<br />

supplicium iam more maiorum traditos ex media morte<br />

eripere ac liberare ausus es? ut, quam damnatis crucem<br />

servis fixeras, hanc indemnatis videlicet civibus Romanis<br />

reservares’. 45<br />

Cicero’s superfluity of superlatives throughout his<br />

speeches, and his seemingly endless lists of witnesses<br />

and evidence piles upon Verres an incredible wealth of<br />

accusations of wrongdoings over his three-year term.<br />

While an example was made of Verres, 46 the volume and<br />

the permanence of his corruption, in almost full view<br />

of the people 47 was typical in a society which had learnt<br />

to accept and put up with blatant corruption. Indeed<br />

Manius Aquilius, a praetor involved in very similar<br />

actions to Verres, extorted tens of thousands of sesterces<br />

(though not as much as the millions of sesterces Verres<br />

extorted), 48 but was acquitted by a jury. 49 Had almost any<br />

other orator prosecuted Verres, he probably would have<br />

had the same fate.<br />

43 Taylor, op. cit., pp. 110-11<br />

44 II.5.1<br />

45 II.5.12<br />

46 Although he did flee to Marseille and live in relative comfort there, once again<br />

showing the laxity of Roman laws in the face of corruption.<br />

47 According to Cicero in II.5.1<br />

48 Levens, op. cit., p. xxxv. Both figures include the monetary worth of extorted<br />

goods.<br />

49 II.5.3<br />

It is clear that Rome was a corrupt state, one in which<br />

the patricians ruled over the plebeians in a conspicuously<br />

unequal democracy. The rampant immorality of the<br />

politicians was accepted by their like-minded equals for it<br />

provided mutual advantages and benefited the upper-class<br />

as a whole; it was endured by the society as they had<br />

become accustomed to it and had not sufficient power<br />

to overcome such a deeply embedded ethos.<br />

Rupert Coy<br />

Year 12<br />

86


BENCHMARK<br />

Above<br />

Beau Mayer<br />

‘Ushi’<br />

Year 8<br />

87


LANGUAGES<br />

Above<br />

Max Maunsell<br />

‘The Cow’<br />

Year 8<br />

88


BENCHMARK<br />

Above<br />

Jordan Turnbull<br />

‘Primary <strong>School</strong>’<br />

Year 9<br />

89


LANGUAGES<br />

Above<br />

Derrick Fang<br />

‘Dragon’<br />

Year 8<br />

90


BENCHMARK<br />

Above<br />

Blake Bullwinkel<br />

‘Sakura and Mount Fuji’<br />

Year 8<br />

91


LANGUAGES<br />

Below<br />

Kim Gallagher<br />

‘The Dragonfly’<br />

Year 8<br />

92


BENCHMARK<br />

Above<br />

Monty McPherson<br />

‘Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter’<br />

Year 10<br />

93


LANGUAGES<br />

Above<br />

Hugo Martyr<br />

‘<strong>School</strong>s’<br />

Year 9<br />

94


BENCHMARK<br />

95


HISTORY<br />

What role does memory play in the construction<br />

of history?<br />

Synopsis<br />

This major work investigates the role of memory in<br />

constructing historical evidence with the Holocaust as a<br />

prime example. Through changing social values regarding<br />

historical interpretation, the role of memory has evolved<br />

and consequently been more readily integrated into the<br />

historical construction. As such, this selective practice<br />

regarding memory-based evidence has lead to the creation<br />

of a publically acknowledged history known as ‘collective<br />

memory’. Oral testimonies, the product of this memory,<br />

have been utilised by Holocaust historians such as<br />

Deborah Lipstadt in order to support a particular view<br />

of this event.<br />

Collective memory, based on Holocaust survivors’<br />

testimonies, has subsequently been propagated and<br />

embellished in various media presentations, such as<br />

documentaries and TV programs and thereby ingrained<br />

into the cultural subconscious. These modern<br />

representations have then ‘set’ history for posterity.<br />

This, in turn, will influence the personal oral testimonies<br />

of the ‘living historians’ because memory is heavily<br />

impacted by the personal identity of its ‘rememberers,’<br />

and identity is further influenced by cultural beliefs.<br />

Thus the relationship between collective memory and<br />

the ‘living historian’ is cyclic and a desire to examine<br />

this tension formed the basis of the project from the start.<br />

This project argues that the impact of trauma upon<br />

memory must be acknowledged and draws examples from<br />

the Holocaust. The concept of Nachtraglichkeit is shown<br />

to be an extension of this concern as it involves the<br />

distancing of the individual from the associated memory.<br />

This detachment from particular events leaves areas open<br />

for interpretation that can be utilised to support a<br />

particular version of the past.<br />

The project also indicates how the problematic nature<br />

of memory has been used to support the two conflicting<br />

Holocaust interpretations: the Holocaust historians or the<br />

Holocaust revisionists. These arguments, presented within<br />

Richard Evans’ book Lying About Hitler, based on the<br />

Irving/Lipstadt libel case, demonstrate how each party<br />

has utilised the inherant flaws of memory for various<br />

purposes in support of its argument.<br />

The project draws the conclusion that it is through the<br />

highly subjective nature of memory that we recognise its<br />

culpability on history. However, historians remain heavily<br />

dependent on memory for evidence in supporting any<br />

given historical discourse and as such it has been utilised<br />

to construct a popular interpretation considered to be a<br />

‘true history’.<br />

Essay<br />

The construction of history is, by its nature, multi-faceted<br />

and is influenced by a combination of internal and<br />

external prejudices. Any given event can therefore be<br />

viewed from multiple perspectives, with each viewpoint<br />

containing its own truth, reality, lies or distortions, which<br />

become incorporated into memory. Recent historians, not<br />

surprisingly, given societal changes and developments in<br />

literacy, education, communication and accessibility, have<br />

come increasingly to use personal narratives and oral<br />

testimonies, the products of memory, as the foundation<br />

for historical argument and discourse. This is also due to<br />

the mounting pressure for additional verification from<br />

the general public of events that may be deemed to have<br />

shaped the collective psyche, most notably war and<br />

genocide. Nicola King (2000, p11) states that ‘memory<br />

can create the illusion of a momentary return to a lost<br />

past’. In this way a personal account of an historical event<br />

can be used as a tangible link to an intangible past.<br />

However, memory at the same time plays a significant role<br />

in the formation of one’s identity and is itself shaped,<br />

moulded and distorted by one’s psyche and experience as<br />

well as the society or community in which one lives, or<br />

has lived. Memory can also shape, and be shaped by, the<br />

changing moral and ethical values within which<br />

historians develop their work and will thereby influence<br />

the way in which they perceive, interpret or reconstruct an<br />

event. The Holocaust of the 1940s provides an example of<br />

this process.<br />

Memory can be divided into two distinct categories: an<br />

individual and personal memory, or a shared perception of<br />

an event known as collective memory. Collective memory<br />

is typically defined as the conglomeration of personal<br />

recollections that creates a sustainable group subconscious.<br />

This concept explored by Maurice Halbwach (1950) views<br />

memory as both a creator and product of a cultural<br />

96


BENCHMARK<br />

What role does memory play in the construction of history? continued<br />

climate and as a result is embodied in a society’s morals<br />

and values. Wertsch states that collective memory ‘results<br />

from a productive tension between the media of memory:<br />

school textbooks, monuments, and films, and the human<br />

agents that create and use those media … [thus] collective<br />

memory is constantly shaped, negotiated and reshaped by<br />

the interactions of its ‘rememberers’ (Rester, n.d, p4).<br />

Memory’s influence in the construction of history is<br />

impacted strongly by social morals and values regarding<br />

historical interpretation. In recent decades there has been<br />

a shift away from traditional diplomatic, economic and<br />

political history toward innovative approaches,<br />

particularly social and cultural studies. This has arisen as<br />

a result of the escalating awareness of equality and human<br />

rights that became prevalent in the 1970s, 1980s and<br />

1990s. As a result it is in a society, which has become<br />

increasingly reflective, both socially and culturally, that<br />

memory has become essential in establishing the nature of<br />

significant events, such as the Holocaust or the Vietnam<br />

War. The recent role of memory in the construction of<br />

history has been challenged by postmodernist scholars in<br />

their belief that memory irrevocably destroys the<br />

authenticity of history. Tom Dixon describes the<br />

‘postmodern cultural historians’ view [as considering] bias<br />

unavoidable in whole or even in part’ (cited by McCallum,<br />

1996, p133). Dixon believes as a result ‘there is a growing<br />

willingness to arrange and edit facts in a way that<br />

supports the message of a particular historian’ (McCallum,<br />

1996, p139) primarily achieved through the selective use<br />

of memory as it provides a definitive view of an event.<br />

Postmodern scholars view historians as ‘not just [being]<br />

dispassionate chroniclers. By their selection, ordering,<br />

highlighting, attribution and analysis of facts they fashion<br />

a particular version of the past’ (The London Times,<br />

4/4/02, n.p). Therefore when Holocaust historians such<br />

as Deborah Lipstadt, select only oral testimonies from<br />

Jewish survivors, the evidence is highly subjective and<br />

supports the established historical view. However, the<br />

ideas presented by Postmodernist scholars support the<br />

Holocaust deniers’ argument. Jewish historian Peter<br />

Novick suggests that the American government<br />

experienced a post-war guilt as a consequence of their role<br />

as a spectator during the Holocaust and therefore their<br />

97<br />

‘support [in] the founding of Israel was an act of moral<br />

expiation’ (Russell, 2000). The survivors, aptly named<br />

‘living historians’ by a society that revered them, became<br />

crucial in providing evidence for Holocaust history. The<br />

oral testimonies provided as evidence formed a collective<br />

memory that influenced the greater society. History in<br />

this sense is, as Grobman and Sherman describe, the<br />

‘combined product of actual past events and the discovery<br />

and description of past events’ (2000, p8).<br />

It is in society that people acquire and sustain a collective<br />

conscious that will in turn influence a personal reflection.<br />

Individuals will ‘recall, recognise, and localise their<br />

memories’ (Halbwachs 1992, p38), and as a result the<br />

‘social memory causes an inertia in social structures …<br />

these interactions are at the base of identity creation and<br />

maintenance’ (Kalman, Page & Stevenson 2008, Slide 5).<br />

Through the creation of an identity, both personal and<br />

national, an event can find continuity and therefore<br />

commemoration. Collective memory is evident in the<br />

memorials that a government erects in commemoration<br />

of an event. These memorials present a specific perspective<br />

of an historical event that is supported by a government<br />

for various intentions. These monuments serve as a daily<br />

reminder of a country’s perspective and therefore the<br />

perspective is cemented into the national identity.<br />

Additionally, it is through these ‘publicly available<br />

com-memorative symbols, rituals, and representations …<br />

[that] the Shoah has been politicised, trivialised and<br />

commercialised’ (Junker, 2001, p2). The creation of a<br />

collective memory by a previous generation, indicated by<br />

the monuments erected, lead to a sustained perception of<br />

an historical event by the larger population. The<br />

Holocaust has become such an event through America’s<br />

construction of over one hundred monuments that Peter<br />

Novick describes as reflecting the rise of Zionism in<br />

America (Russell, 2000, n.p).<br />

Collective memory plays a fundamental role in<br />

influencing individual memory and thus enhances the<br />

subjectivity associated with oral testimonies. Collective<br />

memory ‘simplifies; sees events from a single, committed<br />

perspective … [reducing] events to mythic archetypes’<br />

(Novick 1999, p4) inevitably resulting in the loss of<br />

individual experience for one historical consciousness.


HISTORY<br />

The issue arises as indicated by Jeffrey K Olick (2007, n.p)<br />

that these collections provide the materials for the<br />

production of a singular memory and prod the individual<br />

into recalling particular events and forgetting others. In<br />

the creation of one perspective, the actual ‘truth’ becomes<br />

lost and is replaced with an artificial perception. This<br />

alternate version of the ‘truth’ is embedded into the<br />

following generation and therefore influences the current<br />

and future construction of history. The Holocaust is a<br />

preeminent example of the influences of collective<br />

memory on the construction of history through the<br />

growing reliance on personal testimonies from living<br />

historians. Arguably this perception has generated an<br />

image of the victimisation for the Jewish people, with a<br />

sense of hagiography in the portrayal of the survivors’<br />

experiences. Simon Wiesenthal describes the manipulative<br />

use of the Holocaust as ‘the Holocaust works every time’<br />

(Junker, 2001, p6). Peter Novick additionally claims that<br />

this collective memory has been used by the Jewish people<br />

as ‘a moral weapon … in the political fight for recognition,<br />

privileges and rights’ (Junker, 2001, p5) in the attempt to<br />

win the gold medal in the ‘Victimisation Olympics’. This<br />

collective memory has been established by the Jewish<br />

people as ‘marking the Holocaust as the climax of an<br />

irrational, eternal Gentile hatred of Jews [and this itself]<br />

exerts a pernicious influence on scholarship’ (2000, p1).<br />

Holocaust survivor and writer Primo Levi’s works based<br />

on ‘the warmth and humanity of his writing had made<br />

Levi a symbol to his readers of the triumph of reason over<br />

the barbarism of genocide’ (New York Times, 1987, n.p).<br />

Primo Levi was a major contributor to the collective<br />

memory in his writings on the year which he spent at<br />

Auschwitz. Levi focused his work on the strength of<br />

character and the will to survive, thereby empowering the<br />

apparent survival stance of the Jewish survivors through<br />

the utilisation of his personal experience. It is through the<br />

projected view of collective memory that the individual<br />

experiences omit and supplement details generating a<br />

falsified construction of history.<br />

The procedures deemed appropriate in the construction<br />

of history fluctuate with any given society. History in the<br />

first half of the twentieth century was written, as Leopold<br />

Von Ranke describes, ‘the way it happened’<br />

(Historiography: The Writing of History, n.d, n.p). Ranke<br />

emphasised the necessity of primary sources with ‘proven<br />

authenticity’ in recording historical events. This idea,<br />

entitled ‘Empiricism’ remained paramount within<br />

society over the early decades of the twentieth century.<br />

Nevertheless, the issue arises in specific cases where<br />

there is little to no physical evidence to draw upon.<br />

The reliability of memory in constructing history<br />

therefore has to be questioned. As Ann Curthoys and<br />

John Docker state, ‘where were the distinctions to be<br />

drawn between legitimate alternative views, ideologically<br />

driven [unconscious] distortion and outright lies and<br />

fabrications?’ (2006, p213).These historiographical issues<br />

associated with the Holocaust, have sanctioned the<br />

Revisionist historians, particularly Ernst Zendel and<br />

David Irving, to argue against the established perceptions<br />

of an event that resulted in the annihilation of six million<br />

Jews in Europe. During the Nuremburg Trials, that<br />

immediately followed the cessation of the Second World<br />

War, survivors’ testimonies and experiences were neglected<br />

in preference to physical evidence. Memory was seen to be<br />

an unimportant facet of the Holocaust particularly in<br />

determining the relevant punishments for crimes against<br />

humanity. This forced the Jews ‘after the war [to]<br />

practically hide themselves … remaining invisible in a<br />

culture of victors, war heroes and faith in progress, no-one<br />

was interested in their stories’ (Junker, 2001, p5).However<br />

this general, neglectful approach to the surviving Jewry<br />

of the Holocaust was addressed by David Boder, a<br />

Jewish-American academic who focused on recording and<br />

preserving oral testimonies and survivors’ accounts in the<br />

immediate post-World War II society. His work would be<br />

continued by Steven Spielberg years later, who by utilising<br />

the newest recording technology, would collect and record<br />

these personal narratives for the modern world.<br />

The transition from the predominant use of written<br />

sources as evident in the late 1940s, was heavily<br />

influenced by the accelerating rate of technology and<br />

visual media that in turn supported the Americanisation<br />

of the Holocaust in the 1960s and 1970s. Memory began<br />

to fill the ever present gaps in the Holocaust debate with<br />

oral testimonies becoming increasing vital to the creation<br />

and preservation of the Jewish victim dogma. As the<br />

98


BENCHMARK<br />

What role does memory play in the construction of history? continued<br />

survivors began to reach retirement age, a heavier<br />

emphasis was placed on collecting and recording their<br />

memory before they had passed away and it was lost. This<br />

ideology supported the funding for Steven Spielburg’s<br />

‘The Shoah: The Last Days’ – a collation of oral<br />

testimonies from survivors. Spielberg, financed by a<br />

multitude of Jewish families, was instructed to create a<br />

documentary that in essence would establish a record for<br />

posterity on the atrocities of the Holocaust. Memory has<br />

slowly been developed as the global benchmark for<br />

evidence regarding the Holocaust, an event that lacked<br />

physical, primary evidence.<br />

The increase in technology in the 1980s allowed<br />

historians to begin to collect and record crucial pieces of<br />

evidence in new ways, thus generating a new sense of the<br />

collective memory. Oral testimonies and memory were<br />

traditionally used by ancient historians such as Herodotus,<br />

to record significant events of their time. Through<br />

inscribing practices, many survivors of these ancient<br />

events were questioned about their experiences and as a<br />

result the recordings we have of these events are similarly<br />

subjective. However, ‘technological advances [have<br />

permitted] increasingly electronically mediated<br />

viewpoints … [leading to] new generations, [feeding] on a<br />

diet of instantaneous information, [possessing] new<br />

expectations of how the past should be viewed’(Hoskins,<br />

2003, n.p). The new generation has adapted to the<br />

technological innovations at the time with a culture that<br />

feeds off the media for ‘factual’ information. Visual<br />

media in particular has become the benchmark in<br />

providing evidence and constructing history for the<br />

greater population. It is efficient in its ability to<br />

encapsulate seemingly non-subjective evidence and<br />

provide an argument to influence the mass population,<br />

contributing to the sense of collective memory. The 1978<br />

series on the Holocaust was an example of the newfound<br />

dependence on oral testimony and memory through<br />

television. Through the recording of Holocaust survivors<br />

and their experiences for future generations, personal<br />

narratives have undertaken the predominant role as<br />

evidence in all social institutions. Holocaust survivor Elie<br />

Wiesel condemned the documentary as a ‘trivialisation’ of<br />

the Holocaust and an insult to its survivors. Through the<br />

99<br />

power of increased technology, memory has been elevated<br />

to be considered accurate and truthful while neglecting<br />

the various historiographical issues and complications.<br />

Trauma has a profound impact on the reliability of oral<br />

testimonies and personal narratives. The emotional<br />

reaction to particular events and experiences can cause<br />

individuals to intentionally detach specific details, making<br />

the experience easier to process at an older age. Trauma<br />

centres itself on the ideology of ‘mourning’ which Freud<br />

describes as ‘the reaction to the loss of a loved person, or<br />

to the loss of some abstraction …’ (Freud, 1957, p244).<br />

The notion of revisiting a past experience is embodied in<br />

the concept of ‘Nachtraglichkeit,’ literally meaning<br />

‘afterwardness’. This idea is interpreted by psycho-analysts,<br />

Laplanche and Potalis, as ‘experiences, impressions and<br />

memory – traces may be revised at a later date to fit in<br />

with a new stage of development … endowed with not<br />

only a new meaning but also with physical effectiveness’<br />

(1973, p111–12).This is explored by Nicola King (2000) as<br />

she suggests that the living historians have presented their<br />

experiences for the specific purpose of defending the<br />

Jewish integrity of the Holocaust in today’s context.<br />

Memory has been fabricated and reproduced to appeal to<br />

the sense of humanity and by extension mould a pro-Israel<br />

view in the West. Trauma in the memory is additionally<br />

considered to result in complications in the view of the<br />

self. Memory is influenced by our perception of our own<br />

identity. However, traumatic experiences may result in as<br />

Dori Laub describes, ‘a split self’ … the inherit trauma<br />

has caused a ‘split’ between the self who experienced [the<br />

Holocaust] and the self who ‘survives’’ (King, 2000, p19).<br />

In this manner, the individual has separated themselves<br />

from the events in the attempt to make the event<br />

unattached to themselves. Experiences lead to the creation<br />

of identity and it is the self-perception of identity which<br />

influences memory. It is in this manner that we recognise<br />

the importance of memory in constructing historical<br />

evidence with the influence of trauma on it leading to<br />

flaws that are exploited by Holocaust revisionists.<br />

It should be recognised that the Holocaust revisionist<br />

argument is based on the subjectivity of memory and oral<br />

testimonies. Holocaust denier David Irving specifically<br />

targets the regurgitation of evidence by historians that


HISTORY<br />

form the collective memory. Memory has become the<br />

foundation of the Holocaust historians’ arguments,<br />

particularly seen in the work of Deborah Lipstadt. Irving<br />

states his belief that all historians have relied on an<br />

‘inter-historian incest’ (1977, p10) when researching the<br />

various Holocaust resources available. In the light of so<br />

few resources, Irving’s finds provide a new and equally<br />

justifiable argument on the Holocaust. Richard Evans in<br />

his appraisal of the 1996 Irving – Lipstadt/Penguin case<br />

over libel states that Irving claims, ‘each successive<br />

biographer of Hitler has repeated or engrossed the legends<br />

created by his predecessors … they had never bothered to<br />

visit the surviving relatives of leading Nazis’ (Evans, 2001,<br />

p16). Irving’s claim of the biased nature in the selection of<br />

oral testimonies indicates the primary focus on only<br />

interviewing surviving Jews, thus supporting the already<br />

widely recognised view of anti-Nazi stance in Western<br />

society. This therefore underlines that memory itself has<br />

been selected and tailored to meet the necessary<br />

arguments of the historians presenting it, with various<br />

other elements of these sources being omitted to sustain a<br />

particular view. The case was viewed by many to be in the<br />

‘protection’ of history as Irving challenged the established<br />

view of the Holocaust, which was regarded as the only<br />

‘true’ history.<br />

John Hope Franklin theorises that ‘the writing of history<br />

reflects the interest, predilections, and even prejudices of a<br />

given generation’ (Historiography: The Writing of History).<br />

Consequently, memory due to its fickle nature is<br />

continually adapting to the multiplicity of factors that<br />

influence it. As a consequence the significant role memory<br />

plays in the construction of any historical event can be<br />

regarded as highly subjective. Carl Becker amply describes<br />

the definition of history as ‘the memory of things said and<br />

done’ (Historiography: The Writing of History), rather than<br />

actual historical truth. This oral-based history has been<br />

propagated as historical truth and thereby assumed within<br />

popular culture. As society has developed socially and<br />

culturally, memory’s role has become increasingly<br />

ingrained into this historical process as a key piece of<br />

evidence on an event such as the Holocaust. Technology<br />

and the influence of visual media are often exploited when<br />

creating a collective memory through accounts of<br />

survivors. However due to memory’s personal nature, oral<br />

testimonies such as those associated with the Holocaust<br />

have been condemned as unreliable. Memory is generally<br />

exposed to the collective memory of society and personal<br />

preoccupations and therefore is altered. It is apparent<br />

however, that regardless of the subjectivity surrounding<br />

the reliability of memory, that oral testimony and<br />

personal narrative have played a pivotal role in defining<br />

the perception of historical truth and thereby have created<br />

the popular interpretation of a ‘true’ history.<br />

Matthew Blake<br />

Year 12 History Extension Major Work<br />

100


BENCHMARK<br />

What motivated Julius Caesar when he crossed<br />

the Rubicon, thus starting the Civil War?<br />

Synopsis<br />

This essay addresses the question: ‘What motivated<br />

Julius Caesar when he crossed the Rubicon, thus starting<br />

the Civil War?’ This question developed following an<br />

in-depth examination of Caesar’s life where patterns of<br />

behaviour indicated consistent motivation for reform and<br />

ambition. However in the case of the Rubicon, his<br />

motivation was somewhat ambivalent.<br />

The essay begins with an examination of Caesar’s life<br />

before the Rubicon and by using Caesar’s contemporaries<br />

and modern historians it is found that reform and<br />

ambition were key motivators. The essay presents an<br />

analysis of Julius Caesar’s The Civil Wars. In this text<br />

Caesar does not overtly reveal his personal ambition,<br />

focusing instead on his reforms and defending the rights<br />

of the Tribunes. The Civil Wars is then compared with<br />

texts written by Caesar’s contemporaries, who argue that<br />

he used reform as an excuse to start the war. Modern<br />

historians are examined in order to discover a more<br />

objective view of the issue. It is found that they focus<br />

upon the conspiracies of Caesar’s enemies and the<br />

influence this had upon the decision Caesar made at<br />

the Rubicon.<br />

The essay then analyses Caesar’s actions after the Rubicon.<br />

After reviewing Caesar’s contemporaries and modern<br />

historians, it is found that whilst he implemented a<br />

number of key reforms there were issues concerning his<br />

desire for a war in Parthia and his aspiration for kingship.<br />

The essay draws upon the contemporary authors such as<br />

Plutarch, Suetonius and Appian. Plutarch in particular<br />

strongly puts forward the view that Caesar used reform as<br />

a tool to begin the Civil War. The following modern<br />

historians were the most useful in informing this essay:<br />

Philip Freeman, Theodor Mommsen, and Michael Parenti<br />

present the case that Caesar was driven by reform; Adrian<br />

Goldsworthy, Ramon L Jiménez, Ronald Syme, Matthias<br />

Gelzer and Howard Hayes Scullard predominantly argue<br />

that he was driven by ambition.<br />

The conclusion of the essay is that while Caesar was<br />

motivated by both ambition and reform when he crossed<br />

the Rubicon, the desire for reform was his primary<br />

motivator.<br />

101<br />

Essay<br />

In 49 BC Julius Caesar knew that by crossing the Rubicon<br />

he was breaking Roman law which forbade a general<br />

leading an army into provincial Italy. His decision would<br />

eventually lead to the collapse of the Roman Republic and<br />

the rise of the Roman emperors. The facts, importance<br />

and repercussions have been studied by historians, past<br />

and contemporary. However, what is in contention<br />

amongst historians is what was driving Caesar: was it his<br />

ambition for power, reputation and glory or was it his<br />

belief in reform? The polarities between these two schools<br />

of thought are reflected in the accounts of Caesar and his<br />

contemporaries. The ambiguity in regards to Caesar’s<br />

motivation has continued for the past two thousand years<br />

and makes it impossible for there to be agreement among<br />

modern historians. However, an analysis of how historians<br />

examine Caesar’s life shows that the answer is reform.<br />

Caesar’s life before 49 BC must be examined to find<br />

evidence for discerning his motivations when he crossed<br />

the Rubicon. If Caesar was a reformer he follows other<br />

reformers of the period, such as the Gracchi brothers and<br />

Sulla. Caesar was born in 100 BC into the illustrious Julii<br />

clan who claimed relation to Aeneas of Troy and his<br />

mother, the goddess Venus. As with all Patrician families<br />

ambition was inbuilt into the men of the family and this<br />

was emphasised for Caesar when at sixteen, he became<br />

head of his household following the death of his father.<br />

Caesar was, for a time, in hiding from Sulla because of his<br />

refusal to marry his daughter and was later known for his<br />

womanising. He was involved in a number of military<br />

actions, won the Citizens Crown for bravery and rose<br />

through the ranks of the Senate. He proved his great<br />

oratory skills and was involved with the Populares’ cause<br />

which sought to bring reform to Rome. Caesar brought<br />

about the first Triumvirate with Pompey and Crassus to<br />

gain his first Consulship, advancing his political career<br />

and implementing a number of reforms. His time as<br />

Consul saw him become enemies with the Optimates who<br />

disliked the attacks he made on their power. He served as<br />

the Governor of Transalpine Gaul and started a ten-year<br />

campaign into Gaul which resulted in it being conquered<br />

and Caesar becoming a hero of Rome. This indicates that


HISTORY<br />

throughout Caesar’s life both reform and ambition played<br />

a role.<br />

Every aspect of Caesar’s life has been analysed by<br />

historians in an attempt to understand what motivated his<br />

actions. Freeman argues that given Caesar grew up in the<br />

Subura, a poorer area of Rome, he had a greater<br />

understanding of the plebeians (Freeman, 2008). Parenti<br />

points out that Caesar showed morality over ambition<br />

when he refused Sulla’s offer to marry his daughter and be<br />

elevated into the dictator’s circle (Parenti, 2003).<br />

Goldsworthy suggests that, ‘It is even possible to see<br />

Caesar’s womanising as an extension of political<br />

competition, sleeping with other Senators’ wives to prove<br />

that he was the better man in the bedroom as well as the<br />

forum’ (Goldsworthy, 2007, p105). Plutarch and<br />

Suetonius make references to an event when Caesar<br />

viewed a statue of Alexander the Great and became visibly<br />

distressed (1983, 1989). According to Plutarch, Caesar<br />

then said in regards to Alexander, ‘Do you think I have<br />

not just cause to weep, when I consider that Alexander at<br />

my age had conquered so many nations, and I have all this<br />

time done nothing that is memorable’? (Plutarch, 1983,<br />

p255). This event in Caesar’s life gives the impression that<br />

Caesar was desperate for glory. Mommsen argues that<br />

Caesar was the leader of the Popularis faction (Mommsen,<br />

1854). Scullard writes that the triumvirate was a product<br />

of ambition for Consulship and power, ‘Three men,<br />

backed by armed force, by the urban populace and by<br />

many of the Equites, imposed their will on the State and<br />

destroyed the power of the Senate … The State and<br />

constitution were now at the mercy of dynasts, principes,<br />

who strove for potentia and dignitas’ (Scullard, 1970,<br />

p118). However, Jiménez argues that Caesar needed the<br />

triumvirate as, ‘The hidebound Senate, headed by its<br />

Consuls elected by the nobility, had always been the<br />

graveyard of reform’ (Jiménez, 2000, p47). Parenti argues<br />

that Caesar’s reforms prove that he was focused on<br />

bringing down the Optimate oligarchy (Parenti, 2003). In<br />

regards to the Gallic Wars, Dio claims that some of the<br />

soldiers complained that the war against Ariovistus had<br />

not been authorised by the Senate, so that they were<br />

risking their lives purely because of Caesar’s personal<br />

ambition (Goldsworthy, 2007).<br />

The first source available on the crossing of the Rubicon is<br />

Caesar himself in The Civil Wars. In this account, the<br />

Civil War was unavoidable because of the actions of his<br />

enemies in Rome who were conspiring against him: ‘…<br />

enemies were assembled in the Senate. Their words and<br />

their numbers frightened the less resolute and emboldened<br />

the hesitant, but robbed the majority of the power of free<br />

decision’ (Caesar, 1966, p4). Caesar argues that his<br />

enemies were preparing for war, ‘The remaining business<br />

was immediately brought before the Senate: to institute<br />

recruitment in the whole of Italy, to send Faustus Sulla<br />

urgently to Mauretania, and to give money from the<br />

treasury to Pompey’ (Caesar, 1966, p6). He mentions how<br />

he wished to avoid war: ‘… (Caesar) was awaiting a reply<br />

to his lenient demands, in the hope that, with some sense<br />

of equity, a peaceable conclusion might be reached’<br />

(Caesar, 1966, p11). He was forced, ‘To assert the freedom<br />

of himself and the Roman people who had been oppressed<br />

by a small fraction’ (Optimates) (Caesar, 1966, p35)<br />

which was shown by ‘… the tribunician veto was being<br />

censured and suppressed by force’ (Caesar, 1966, p7).<br />

Caesar therefore viewed the crossing of the Rubicon as<br />

something that was unavoidable and the right action<br />

to take.<br />

This view was disputed by many of Caesar’s<br />

contemporaries who saw Caesar’s motives as<br />

predominantly about his own personal ambition. Plutarch<br />

around 90 AD argues against Caesar saying that he used<br />

reform as a tool for his ambitious aims. Plutarch writes in<br />

regard to the dismissal of the Tribunes, ‘… insulted<br />

Antony and Curio and drove them out of the Senate in<br />

disgrace. So of his own accord gave Caesar the best<br />

possible excuse for taking action’ (Plutarch, 1983, p 275).<br />

Plutarch focused on ambition by comparing Caesar to the<br />

highly ambitious Alexander the Great, as he wished to<br />

make the point that Greeks and Romans had more in<br />

common than they liked to admit (Plutarch, 1983). This<br />

idea of reform was continued by Suetonius, who wrote in<br />

the first century while in charge of the imperial archives<br />

under the Emperor Hadrian, ‘Force was, in effect used<br />

and the Tribunes fled towards Cisalpine Gaul: which<br />

became Caesar’s pretext for launching the Civil War’<br />

(Suetonius,1989, p26). Lucan, who wrote in the first<br />

102


BENCHMARK<br />

What motivated Julius Caesar when he crossed the Rubicon,<br />

thus starting the Civil War? continued<br />

century, suggests that Caesar could not accept Pompey as<br />

an equal, as he had to be the first man of Rome and so felt<br />

compelled to go to war with him (Goldsworthy, 2007).<br />

The only near contemporary of Caesar who does not put<br />

all the blame on Caesar is Appian, who argues both were<br />

evenly at fault. He wrote during the reign of Antonius<br />

Piso in the second century AD that the war had now<br />

begun on both sides. Appian believed that Caesar was<br />

driven by ambition when he stated, ‘In pursuit of his<br />

ambition he was prodigal beyond his means’ (Appian,<br />

1996, p69), but this was not referring specifically to the<br />

Rubicon. The fact that these historians wrote hundreds<br />

of years after the event, questions the reliability of their<br />

accounts.<br />

Over the last two hundred years historians have been<br />

similarly divided in their views on what motivated Caesar<br />

when he crossed the Rubicon, but they recognised the<br />

need for reform in the Roman government. All of the<br />

historians referred to are reliable in that they proffer a very<br />

substantive basis to their views. They extensively reference<br />

ancient and modern sources and all of their views are<br />

substantiated by historical fact. All (including the Nobel<br />

Prize Winner, Theodore Mommsen) explore the various<br />

views on the motivations of Caesar at the Rubicon.<br />

Ramon L Jiménez, who has written extensively on Ancient<br />

Rome, makes reference to a number of events which<br />

support the view that Caesar was being conspired against<br />

by those in Rome by making reference to how ninety<br />

percent of Senators on 1 December agreed to Caesar’s<br />

disbarment proposal but it was blocked by twenty-two<br />

Optimate Senators who manipulated the majority of the<br />

Senate (Jiménez, 2000). Jiménez also states, ‘Although the<br />

Senate’s vote was not a decree, Marcellus was on dubious<br />

legal ground. Nevertheless, Pompey, so long accustomed<br />

to responding to such calls to arms, began recruiting more<br />

troops and preparing for war’ (Jiménez, 2000, p60),<br />

indicating their desire for war. Theodor Mommsen<br />

expresses the view that Caesar was the heroic reformer.<br />

Mommsen was one of the founders of the liberal Deutsche<br />

Fortschrittspartei (German Progressive Party) in 1861.<br />

He compared the Optimates of Caesar’s time with the<br />

Prussian Junkers of his own period (Mommsen, 1865).<br />

103<br />

Howard Hayes Scullard argues that there were tyrants on<br />

both sides, ‘The hands of none of the leaders were spotless:<br />

behind them all gleamed the corrupting influence of<br />

power. No real principles were at stake. That was the<br />

tragedy. It was a struggle for personal power, prestige and<br />

honour, without regard for the libertas of others’ (Scullard,<br />

1970, p143). Scullard and Ronald Syme write that Caesar<br />

did not want the war as it showed his failing as a politician<br />

and Pompey and the people of Rome did not desire the<br />

war either, but the Optimates did (1970, 1974). Adrian<br />

Goldsworthy suggests that ‘Caesar had not fought the<br />

civil war to reform the Republic’ (Goldsworthy, 2007,<br />

p459) but that Caesar recognised the problems that the<br />

Republic Government had, ‘The Republic had become<br />

dominated by a faction who ignored the normal rule of<br />

law and particularly refused to acknowledge the<br />

traditional powers and rights of the tribunate’<br />

(Goldsworthy, 200, p459). Michael Parenti, a Marxist<br />

historian who thinks the Optimates were to blame, writes<br />

in regards to the dismissal of the tribunes, ‘They<br />

(Optimates) had used armed force to abrogate the power<br />

of the people’s tribunes. They had passed a harsh<br />

ultimatum that normally was reserved for suppressing<br />

mutiny or violence – for which there had been neither’<br />

(Parenti, 2003, p126). Parenti reflects the Marxist<br />

dialectic of the continuous class war. Philip Freeman<br />

shares a similar view that the responsibility for the war<br />

lay with the Optimates who wanted to bring down the<br />

reformist Caesar, ‘On the other hand, they (moderates<br />

of the Senate) saw the Optimates as reactionaries whose<br />

unreasonable devotion to the status quo was pushing<br />

Caesar and the Populares movement into open<br />

rebellion’(Freeman, 2008, p234).<br />

It is all very well that Caesar claimed to be fighting for<br />

reform, with the breaking point being the removal of the<br />

tribunes, but the following actions need to be analysed to<br />

understand if he truly was fighting for the reasons he<br />

publically announced. After Caesar advanced past the<br />

Rubicon he quickly took over Italy, sparing many of his<br />

enemies as he proceeded. He was successful in his wars<br />

against Pompey in Greece, Cato in Africa and Pompey’s<br />

sons in Spain ending in 45 BC. Caesar then carried out a


HISTORY<br />

large number of reforms before he was assassinated on<br />

15 March 44 BC.<br />

Caesar wrote in regard to the clemency of his campaign,<br />

‘Let us see if in this way we can willingly win the support<br />

of all and gain a permanent victory … This is a new way<br />

of conquest; we grow strong through pity and generosity’<br />

(Caesar, 1966, p9). This implies that Caesar wanted to<br />

bring about reforms in his new government that would be<br />

long lasting. The effect that Caesar’s clemency had upon<br />

Romans is best shown by Velleius Paterculus. Writing in<br />

the early first century AD he describes how it went<br />

beyond comprehension when Caesar pardoned his<br />

enemies. Goldsworthy argues that his clemency was not<br />

about bringing about lasting reforms but, ‘formed a<br />

central part of Caesar’s propaganda campaign’<br />

(Goldsworthy, 2007, p473). However Scullard makes<br />

reference to how even during the civil war Caesar still<br />

managed to carry out a number of reforms (1970).<br />

This evidence indicates that Caesar did indeed wish to<br />

reform Rome.<br />

Gelzer (1969), Freeman (2008), Goldsworthy (2007),<br />

Scullard (1970) and Suetonius (1989) all make reference<br />

to the numerous reforms that Caesar brought to Rome<br />

during the period in which he was Dictator, such as the<br />

reforms to the grain dole, the banning of luxury items and<br />

the harsher penalties for patricians and equestrians who<br />

committed murder. Gelzer suggests that ‘Caesar was<br />

unlike other Roman statesmen in that his political activity<br />

was not bounded by the city state, but by the Empire’<br />

(Gelzer, 1969, 273), shown by his introduction of new<br />

colonies which Goldsworthy believes were much needed<br />

(Goldsworthy, 2007). Syme reported that Caesar had no<br />

desire to reform but found that with the death of so many<br />

Senators he had to rebuild the crumbling Roman<br />

government through reform (Syme, 1974). Jiménez makes<br />

the point that most of these reforms would not aggravate<br />

the Optimates as they did not increase the democracy of<br />

Rome (Jiménez, 2000). Parenti disagrees with this point<br />

saying, ‘Caesar’s concern was not to lord over the common<br />

people but to outdo a powerfully entrenched aristocratic<br />

oligarchy’ (Parenti, 2003, p164), but he admits that<br />

‘Caesar never intended to level the rich and the poor but<br />

he certainly wanted to roll back some of the worst class<br />

abuses perpetrated by the wealthy’ (Parenti, 2003, p164).<br />

This evidence indicates that Caesar brought in the<br />

reforms he promised, thus making him the reformer<br />

he claimed to be.<br />

Caesar’s last actions are also important in determining<br />

what motivated him. Gelzer suggests Caesar knew he<br />

could not manage the affairs of a great empire on his own,<br />

so he took steps to increase the number in the Senate to<br />

almost one thousand members (Gelzer, 1969). Stephen<br />

Dando-Collins argues, ‘In fact, Caesar was merely filling<br />

the senate with men beholden to him for their elevation<br />

and who would outnumber the aristocrats who sat in the<br />

senate’ (Stephen Dando-Collins, 2010, p32). Scullard<br />

proposes that Caesar merely did it because the Senate was<br />

not large enough for the empire and needed to be<br />

replenished before he began his campaign into Parthia<br />

(Scullard, 1970). Gelzer (1969) and Philip Freeman<br />

advocate that ‘… the greatest reason for an eastern<br />

campaign was Caesar’s unquenchable ambition … Caesar<br />

now in his mid-fifties, still dreamed of conquering new<br />

worlds’ ( Freeman,2008, p384). This evidence indicates<br />

Caesar clearly had ambition for further military glory at<br />

the expense of carrying out his reforms personally.<br />

Caesar’s absolute power was seen as a threat to the<br />

Republic. Scullard puts forward the view that ‘Caesar had<br />

acquired autocratic power, but whether he intended to use<br />

this authority to overthrow the Republic and become king<br />

remains uncertain’ (Scullard, 1970, p155). Plutarch<br />

disagrees with this view writing that Caesar’s desire to be<br />

king was the reason that he became hated not only by the<br />

aristocracy but also by the people. Plutarch writes, ‘This<br />

was indeed a tyranny avowed, since his power now was<br />

not only absolute, but perpetual too’ (Plutarch, 1983,<br />

p296). Plutarch gives the example of when, ‘contrary to all<br />

custom, Caesar remained seated like a king while the most<br />

respected body in ancient Rome stood and addressed him’<br />

(Plutarch, 1983, p300), to prove that Caesar thought too<br />

highly of himself. Suetonius said that Caesar ‘took other<br />

honours which, as a mere mortal, he certainly should have<br />

refused’ (Suetonius, 1989, p46). Jiménez writes, ‘By now<br />

it had become clear, if it had not been clear before …<br />

Caesar had no intention of restoring the Republican<br />

institutions that he had claimed to be defending five<br />

104


BENCHMARK<br />

What motivated Julius Caesar when he crossed the Rubicon,<br />

thus starting the Civil War? continued<br />

years before at the Rubicon’ (Jiménez, 2000, p230).<br />

However, as Appian makes clear that in Caesar’s will ‘to<br />

the people were bequeathed his gardens for public use and<br />

also seventy-five denarii to every adult male Roman’<br />

(Appian, 1996, p146), supporting the idea he did care for<br />

the people. This evidence suggests that Caesar may have<br />

been corrupted by power and turned away the reform he<br />

claimed to be defending.<br />

In conclusion, Caesar was clearly motivated by reform<br />

when he crossed the Rubicon, starting the Civil War. It is<br />

true that Caesar was an ambitious man and he exhibited<br />

this ambition throughout his life. Many of the important<br />

choices that Caesar made were borne out of his great<br />

desire for power, reputation and glory. However, in the<br />

case of the Rubicon, Caesar found himself in a war he did<br />

not want but fought it for the greater good of Rome.<br />

Caesar was forced to act as a result of the corrupt acts of<br />

the Optimate Senators, who made the war unavoidable.<br />

As Caesar said, ‘Still I am prepared to resort to anything,<br />

to submit to anything, for the sake of the Commonwealth’<br />

(Caesar, 1966, p 17).<br />

Jack McDonogh<br />

Year 12 History Extension Major Work<br />

105

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