INfusion 47 ebook - Summer 2012 - NMIT

Dusseldorf Lake
S.L. Higgins
141
S.L. Higgins
Misandry
I’ve never known heartbreak. I always prided myself on ending a relationship
before I got hurt; I never got emotionally involved. I made a wall around my
heart: three inches thick and ten metres high. But he got through. He swept
me off my feet and made it harder to breath. He made all the clichés true and
all those silly love songs make sense.
But one day I caught the early train one day and saw him — and her.
Michelle. I guess I had it coming: she was easy; I wasn’t. I envisioned scenarios
of walking over and making a scene, or saying hi because it didn’t bother me;
even though it did. But the truth is, when I saw them, it felt like someone had
… it felt, as clichéd as this sounds, as though someone had sucker-punched
me in the stomach.
I ran off the train and waited thirty minutes in the pouring rain for the
next one. I got three texts from him in that time. I ignored them. He’s with her
— either hiding the fact that we’re an ‘us’, or making fun of me.
When the next train arrived, I grabbed the most secluded seat I could.
I’m sure I’d frighten little kids with my smudged makeup. My hair — once
intricately braided into a bun — was now a destroyed plait, only half resting
on my shoulder like it should.
I took out my iPod and scrolled through my playlist.
‘Nothing Compares 2 U’ — Sinead O’Connor
‘I Will Always Love You’ — Dolly Parton
‘This Kiss’ — Unknown Artist
‘Unchained Melody’ — Righteous Brothers.
Really? As if my day couldn’t get any worse. I kept scrolling until ‘I Hate
Everything About You’ by Three Days Grace came on. Still a love song, but it
works. Why did I change my playlist when I was happy in my relationship with
Sebastian? Where’s my Linkin Park, Green Day, RZA, Chester Bennington —
my pump up music?
Ugh, this is not my day. The train was nowhere near full yet this arse
decided to sit next to me. I sneezed on him, thinking he might be afraid of
germs.
Nope. God damn him. Why wouldn’t he piss off?
‘Hi, I’m James.’ The annoying man reached out his hand.