PeterWatts_Blindsight

Peter Watts 27 Blindsight
learning the rules that allowed me to infiltrate human society. It
had always worked before. Somehow, though, the presence of real
aliens had changed the dynamics of the equation. Mere
observation didn't satisfy any more. It was as though the presence
of this new outgroup had forced me back into the clade whether I
liked it or not; the distance between myself and the world suddenly
seemed forced and faintly ridiculous.
Yet I couldn't, for my life, figure out how to let it go.
Chelsea had always said that telepresence emptied the Humanity
from Human interaction. "They say it's indistinguishable," she
told me once, "just like having your family right there, snuggled up
so you can see them and feel them and smell them next to you. But
it's not. It's just shadows on the cave wall. I mean, sure, the
shadows come in three-dee color with force-feedback tactile
interactivity. They're good enough to fool the civilized brain. But
your gut knows those aren't people, even if it can't put its finger on
how it knows. They just don't feel real. Know what I mean?"
I didn't. Back then I'd had no clue what she was talking about.
But now we were all cavemen again, huddling beneath some
overhang while lightning split the heavens and vast formless
monsters, barely glimpsed in bright strobe-frozen instants, roared
and clashed in the darkness on all sides. There was no comfort in
solitude. You couldn't get it from interactive shadows. You
needed someone real at your side, someone to hold on to, someone
to share your airspace along with your fear and hope and
uncertainty.
I imagined the presence of companions who wouldn't vanish the
moment I unplugged. But Chelsea was gone, and Pag in her wake.
The few others I could have called— peers and former clients with
whom my impersonations of rapport had been especially
convincing—didn't seem worth the effort. Flesh and blood had its
own relationship to reality: necessary, but not sufficient.
Watching the world from a distance, it occurred to me at last: I
knew exactly what Chelsea had meant, with her Luddite ramblings
about desaturated Humanity and the colorless interactions of
virtual space. I'd known all along.
I'd just never been able to see how it was any different from real