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continued from page 49<br />
50<br />
Anklebiter<br />
Annoyance Turns to Humor <strong>FOH</strong><br />
There’s a point during every annoying<br />
gig where it just becomes funny. I don’t<br />
know if this just happens to me, but I find<br />
some requests laughable, to the point that I<br />
can’t hide the glee in my face or my voice!<br />
“El Grande Nutbar” had called to see<br />
if Tuesday was good for us for a full dress<br />
rehearsal with production! Did I mention<br />
this was a one-off at a pool that gets used<br />
every day? I just couldn’t help myself — I<br />
started laughing right in his ear. I thought<br />
maybe he was joking, and it would have<br />
been a good joke, but 30 seconds into my<br />
guffawing I realized that I was the only one<br />
who got the joke.<br />
Um, ah, awkward… “No,” I had to tell<br />
him, “Unless you want to double the budget,<br />
we won’t be out there on Tuesday.” Then he<br />
wanted just me to show up. Again, I told him<br />
that wouldn’t be happening. He did seem a<br />
little confused at my lack of donateable time<br />
for his event. And I was done explaining. “See<br />
you Saturday,” I said with my purest form of<br />
Company Page Phone Web<br />
fake enthusiasm. I clicked over to my friend,<br />
explained the call and enjoyed his reaction<br />
for a full five minutes as well.<br />
On to the gig! We arrived about 20 minutes<br />
early and started to load into an area<br />
where there were so many safety orange cables<br />
strewn about I thought the Irish Protestants<br />
must be doing the gig. We were going<br />
to be safe, underpowered, but safe!<br />
As we all do, I had resolved to keep my<br />
head down and just do my job. But the<br />
sound engineer had the two wireless mics<br />
dropping out and getting hit on a pretty<br />
regular basis. And not getting hit a little, but<br />
whammed to the point that I jumped a few<br />
times as my ears began to hurt. The cathedral<br />
reverb overly awash on these mics really<br />
only became evident during the three<br />
hours where the MC made announcements.<br />
You have to admire a guy who has a mains<br />
rig set up with seven mismatched speakers<br />
and no EQ. The sound check of the monitors<br />
was proceeding with the Elvis tracks<br />
— and I didn’t know they made retro MP3s.<br />
Ashly Audio/CAMCO 17 585-872-0010 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-222<br />
A&S Case Company 19 818 509 5920 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-210<br />
Aphex 45 818.767.2929 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-146<br />
Audio-Technica 7 330.686.2600 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-131<br />
Bosch/Midas Digial Consoles C1, 11 248.876.1000 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-161<br />
Carvin Pro Audio 14 800.854.2235 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-198<br />
Checkers Industrial Products 18 800.438.9336 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-215<br />
Clair 25 717-626-4000 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-226<br />
Community Pro 46 (800) 523-4934 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-221<br />
dbx Professional Products 35 801.568.7660<br />
DiGiCo 37 516.249.1399 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-105<br />
Electro-Voice/Bosch 21 248.876.1000 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-171<br />
Innovason 47 888.DIG-DESK http://foh.hotims.com/18524-184<br />
JBL Professional 41 818.894.8850<br />
Kaltman Creations 3 678-714-2000 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-216<br />
Lightviper 49 914-489-1427 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-228<br />
Link USA 42 407-774-0088 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-229<br />
Martin Audio 33 519.747.5853 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-111<br />
Meyer Sound Laboratories C2 510.486.1166 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-112<br />
North American Pro Audio 43 (0)870 755 6263 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-223<br />
OVO/ Mega Systems 32 210.684.2600 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-154<br />
Peavey Electronics 23 877.732.8391 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-174<br />
Precise Corporate Staging 9 480.759.9700 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-164<br />
Proel America 8 390-861-81241 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-230<br />
QSC Audio Products C4 800.854.4079 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-115<br />
Renkus-Heinz 5 949.588.9997 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-117<br />
Rock-It Cargo 27 310-568-3781 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-231<br />
Sennheiser Electronic Corp. 22 860.434.9190 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-209<br />
Spectrum Sound 32 615-391-3700 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-224<br />
Tour Tech East 27 (902) 468-2800 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-220<br />
Westone Music Products 4 719.540.9333 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-121<br />
Whirlwind 15 888-733-4396 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-187<br />
Worx Audio 48 336.275.7474 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-122<br />
Yamaha Commercial<br />
Audio Systems<br />
Yamaha Corporation<br />
of America<br />
1, 13, C3 714.522.9011 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-123<br />
31 714.522.9011 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-159<br />
NOVEMBER 2008 www.fohonline.com<br />
The technique is apparently to be very loud<br />
and muffled, but what really put the icing<br />
on the cake was the vastly variable levels of<br />
the tracks with no learning curve from the<br />
sound guy.<br />
A Horror Show <strong>FOH</strong><br />
The results are horrifying, but maybe<br />
we are doing a horror show… Remember, I<br />
wasn’t here for the full dress rehearsal production<br />
check. The resort guests, average<br />
age of 60, looked like they might enjoy an<br />
obnoxiously loud, smeary performance.<br />
Oops, there goes the wireless again. Sorry, I<br />
jumped. I wouldn’t do anything about it, like<br />
change the channel or try and raise it — it<br />
should be fine by show time!<br />
I was witness to this nightmare, which<br />
honestly made me feel better about my<br />
past sound screw-ups. There were two highlights<br />
of my day: the first being the scrawny,<br />
elderly guest who decided I was in charge<br />
and yelled at me for five minutes until the<br />
“producer” raced over. This guest was one<br />
Company Page Phone Web<br />
of those strange people who doesn’t enjoy<br />
painful audio. My lighting guy on the followspot<br />
tower, with a perfect view and close<br />
enough to hear the verbal bashing, almost<br />
wet his pants as I was berated. The surrealness<br />
of the moment was awesome as my<br />
grin almost caused this gentleman to come<br />
to blows, drawing up the maximum of his<br />
brittle, jumbo-shrimp postured, 140-pound<br />
body to the point where I was concerned for<br />
his health.<br />
The other highlight was the boss hugging<br />
me after the show, thanking me for<br />
my efforts. He also said, “well, I guess you<br />
get what you pay for” and “It was the worst<br />
sound ever.” Think he made a mistake going<br />
cheap? Do you think they got a gig or a<br />
video out of this? Did I badmouth the other<br />
sound guy? No. Did I earn the client’s respect<br />
and trust? Yes. Did I earn the client’s future<br />
business? Who knows…<br />
Sergeant Schadenfreude says, “Keep<br />
it civil out there!” (Cue “Hill Street Blues”<br />
theme.)<br />
MARKET PLACE<br />
Audioeast.com 51 978-937-3944 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-124<br />
Gabriel Sound 51 973.831.7500 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-149<br />
Gear Box Pro 51 877-789-5774 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-211<br />
Hi-Tech Audio Systems 51 650.742.9166 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-127<br />
HME 51 858-535-6054 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-232<br />
New York Case/ Hybrid Cases 51 800.645.1707 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-168<br />
Sound Productions 51 800.203.5611 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-129<br />
TC Furlong 51 847.367.9588 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-233<br />
Transamerica Audio Group 51 702-365-5155 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-213<br />
Under Cover 51 508.997.7600 http://foh.hotims.com/18524-234<br />
EMPLOYMENT
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