Technical World Magazine

Conscientious Man
A CKKTAiN English mayor, whose period of
oflice had come to an end, was surveying the
work of the year. "I have endeavored," he
said with an air of conscious rectitude, "to
administer justice without swerving to partiality,
on the one hand, or impartiality on
the 0\\\(iry —London Daily Telegraph.
BLOWING OFF STEAM 34;
Milk-Table Gossip
Mrs. Tadcy— "It is rumored that your luisband
Tom is living a douljle life!"
Mrs. ]\Ialti:sk— -"I'm afraid that he's living
eighteen of 'CaQ\\\\" —Harper's Weekly.
Lucks Man
"I WILL never marry now," said the rejected
suitor. "Why not, pray?" she asked. "If you
won't marry me, who ys'\W." —Buffalo Express.
Providential Escape
The old lady had had a severe illness, and
she was relating its vicissitudes to a friend
or two in the grocer's shop when the minister
came in. "It's only hy the Lord's mercy," slie
piously declared, "that I'm not in heaven
to-night." —Manchester Guardian.
Mother Kne-w
Daughtkr— "Mother, could I love two me.i
Mother— "Not if
at the same time?"
one of them gets wise."
Princeton Tiser.
All Invisible
Curate (to lady who has taken refuge in
ditch) — -"Didn't 1 assure you tliat a cow is
only dangerous wlien it has lost its calf?"
She— "That's why I was frightened. I
couldn't see a calf anyvvliere."— iP?,;,^:/;.
A Warning
Love'.s young dream appears to have met
with an interruption somewhere, judging by
the following pathetic warning ad, in the
Auckland Herald of a recent date :— "O. D.
No; father's home.—V. K.'' —Ne-.v Zealand Free
Lance.
Couldn't Fool Her
Little Girl— "Look, auntie, there's a poor
man witli a wooden leg. Can't I give him a
pemiy ?"
Ai'NT — "Certainly not, dear. 1 have no
doubt he's an impostor."— /'//;/