DANNY'S OWN STORY BY DON MARQUIS TO MY ... - Pink Monkey

Hutt by compulsive medical advice, me being fur
a while doing some work on the city pavements
through a mistake about me in the police court.
William Dear looks at me like it was the day of
judgment and his job was to keep the fatted calves
separate from the goats and prodigals, and he says:
"If I were you, Aunt Estelle, the first thing would
be to get his hair cut and his face washed and then
get him some clothes."
"William Dear is my friend," thinks I.
She calls James, which was a butler. James,
he buttles me into a bathroom the like o' which
I never seen afore, and then he buttles me into a
suit o' somebody's clothes and into a room at the
top o' the house next to his'n, and then he comes
back and buttles a comb and brush at me. James
was the most mournful-looking fat man I ever
seen, and he says that account of me not being
respectable I will have my meals alone in the kitchen
after the servants has eat.
The first thing I knowed I been in that house
more'n a week. I eat and I slept and I smoked
and I kind of enjoyed not worrying about things
fur a while. The only oncomfortable thing about
being the perfessor's guest was Miss Estelle. Soon's
she found out I was a agnostic she took charge o'
my intellectuals and what went into 'em, and she
makes me read things and asts me about 'em, and
she says she is going fur to reform me. And whatever
brand o' disgrace them there agnostics really
is I ain't found out to this day, having come acrost
the word accidental.
Biddy Malone, which was the kitchen mechanic,
she says the perfessor's wife's been over to her
mother's while this smallpox has been going on,
and they is a nurse in the house looking after Miss
Margery, the little kid that's sick. And Biddy,
she says if she was Mrs. Booth she'd stay there,
too. They's been some talk, anyhow, about Mrs.