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THE ONE AND ONLY KERMIT SONIA BARBOSA<br />
dictated to the Author<br />
Sonia Barbosa<br />
“Ma!...Go, Kermit.” You’re probably wondering what‘s the point <strong>of</strong> all this. Well, I’ve got<br />
this stupid mother at home who thinks she is the queen <strong>of</strong>, world. My ma thinks I have to<br />
talk to her friends, when they come to the house, they are so annoying. My mom’s friends<br />
don’t understand that I don’t like them poking me, asking me to talk or to repeat what they<br />
are saying. I’m Kermit. And I don’t like my mother’s friends, especially my mom’s<br />
boyfriends. They don’t understand that she’s my mom. My mom’s friends have to realize<br />
that I am the only parrot for my mom.<br />
I‘m a very handsome fellow. My mom friends aren’t the only one I do not like. I have a<br />
sister named ninja, and she’s the family dog. I don’t like her because every time my mom<br />
takes her out she wants to eat me, and chase me back into the cage. I’m afraid <strong>of</strong> her<br />
because she might eat me. Or I will pop her eyes out, so mom keeps us apart. My mom<br />
sometime use ninja to scare me, so when she brings the dog out I start saying heeelp, I will<br />
start repeating all the words I know ,because I really afraid <strong>of</strong> that ugly dog.<br />
By the way, you may not know this but I value my freedom. I remember the first time the<br />
gate was closed. I can tell you that it didn’t last very long. I made such a racket that mom<br />
had to open it up. From that point on, it has stayed open, if not I have my own skill to open<br />
the gate all on my own. That’s a secret that my mom thinks I don’t know. There are many<br />
things I do that my mom doesn’t know. She does not know that when she leaves home I<br />
climb down the cage and walk all around the house, and also peck the furniture. But when I<br />
see her coming I run up the cage like nothing has happened. When I am ready to go to bed<br />
my pretty mom gives me lots <strong>of</strong> kisses and she whispers s<strong>of</strong>tly in my ear, “I love you,<br />
Kermit.”<br />
Well, when I wake up in the morning and my mom is still sleeping I start yelling heeeelp,<br />
mom, what, go Kermit, go, go. Sometimes they get so upset at me in the morning that they<br />
start calling me names, like stupid, idiot, donkey head, and stupid bird. That is one <strong>of</strong> the<br />
reasons that I come down from the cage and I eat the furniture. My mom and my sisters<br />
could be very mean to me. But all in all they are the best. Now they have a new mean way<br />
to run me in the cage when I let myself out. Their new way <strong>of</strong> teaching me is to get the<br />
water bottle and squirt me with it , I really don’t like it when my mom and my ugly sisters<br />
threaten me with that stupid water bottle. That’s the reason I let myself out <strong>of</strong> my cage<br />
and hang <strong>of</strong>f the corner <strong>of</strong> my cage, so when my mom or my sisters walk by I try to get<br />
them with my beak. It’s funny because when I try to get them and they don’t see me, they<br />
get so scared. I start laughing the same way my mom does. She hears me laughing and gets<br />
upset. My mom is a sour puss so she decides to put the cover on my cage. They can’t take<br />
jokes, but I have to hang <strong>of</strong>f my cage and take their abuse.<br />
All in all we fight like parrot and humans. We can’t be with out each other.<br />
Operation Bootstrap<br />
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