You know you're a drunk when... - I Want a BUZZ

2 You know The you’re 12 Days a of drunk Christmas...Jaxbars.com
when...

COVER STORY
CONTENTS
7
Drinking on a Budget
Featured Article
MUSIC
Featured Band
The Lamp Shade Award
The Do’s & Dont’s of Holiday Office Parties
Advice Column
18
Bouncing Souls
Michael (Drums)
Pete (Guitar)
Bryan (Bass)
Greg (Vocals)
10
6
“Hot Guy Seeks Free Rent”
6
“Holiday History”
Monthly ReviewS
Resturant
Gourmet Guide:
RJ Gators
Seven Bridges
Mellow Mushroom
The Underground
Something Distant
Jeff (Lead Vocals/Guitar)
John (Bass)
Jon (Drums)
Wes (Lead Guitar)
Bartenders
10
Beer, Wine & Cigar
16
Beer - Frohe Weihnachten Merry Christmas
Wine - Belle Glos Clark & Telephone, Mount
Langhi Riesling, Oriel Femme Fatale
Cigar - Macanudo Gold Label
8
Buzz Style. Happy Holidays!! Source: Seamus Kennedy
Lisa & Clarence-
Lynch’s & Aromas
Bar
4
4
Whitey’s Fish Camp
& The Atlantic
jaxbars.com
BUZZ
Publisher / Ad Director:
Mike White – mike@cfmedia.net
Associate Publisher:
Kyle Brown – kyle@cfmedia.net
Design, Production, Layout:
Erica Lanier – erica@cfmedia.net
Amy Gress – amy@cfmedia.net
Intern: Natalia Gonzales
STAFF
Phone – 904-232-3001
Fax – 904-232-3003
Email - buzz@jaxbars.com
Staff Writers:
Patrick Sullivan – patrick@cfmedia.net
Courtney Nichols
Kelly Bovell
Sales:
Megan Fee – megan@jaxbars.com
Monica Grandy – monica@jaxbars.com
Tommy Oliser - Tommy@Jaxbars.com
3

Whitey’s Fish Camp
Bar Review
The Atlantic
Bar Review
Style:
Restaurant/Bar
Style:
Dance Club, lounge, pub
Location: 2032 County Road 220
Orange Park
Phone: 904-269-4198
Website: whiteysfishcamp.com
Open:
Mon 4:30pm – 12am
Tues - Thur11am – 12am
Sat & Sun 11am – 2am
Whitey’s Fishcamp has been a staple of Orange Park and Highway 17 since 1963. Everyone knows
Whitey’s Fishcamp because of their amazing seafood restaurant and famous catfish entrées.
But Whitey’s is more than just a great restaurant for the family. It is also a cool place to get a drink,
right on the river with an excellent view by the way, and listen to some great music.
Whitey’s has live music from great local and national bands every Wednesday thru Sunday. They also
have deck music on Wednesdays and every Friday night, which includes terrific drink specials. Also
on Friday you can also enjoy half price appetizers from 4 – 7pm. Whitey’s also has a popular Happy
Hour every day of the week from 3 – 7pm. Sure you can get a drink at many bars, but Whitey’s is one
of the few great bars that sits right on top of the river. Not next to, but practically on the water. If
you want to enjoy a cold drink and watch the sunset, this is a perfect location to relax after work.
Coming up in December, Whitey’s is having their annual Doctor’s Lake Boat Parade. If you want
to enter your boat into the parade, call Whitey’s today. The Boat Parade is Saturday, December 9th
and it starts at 6:30pm. The parade will also include give-aways and live music from ‘Str8 Up.’ The
main prize is an eight person hot tub with all proceeds from the parade will benefit the Community
Hospice and Safe Animal Shelter. Also on December 31st, Whitey’s is having a huge New Years’ Eve
party. Check out their ad in the Buzz for more details.
Whitey’s Fishcamp is not only a great restaurant on the river, but an excellent place for
entertainment. With drink specials and a live music scene that can’t be matched out on their deck,
Whitey’s is a place you will fall in love with. Check out Whitey’s today.
Location: 333 N. 1st Street Jax Beach
Phone: 249-3338
Website: www.the-atlantic.com
Open:
Wednesday - Saturday
Are you into lounging around drinking with
your friends or braking a sweat on the dance
floor? Either way, The Atlantic is the best place
at the beach to do exactly that. The Atlantic has
plenty of room for hanging out and just relaxing
in this lounge-type bar. However, when the weekend arrives and the music is blaring the
dance floor will be packed. Every Saturday from 9 pm until close dance all night long
with DJ KGB.
The Atlantic has a DJ almost every night and drinks specials that won’t hurt your wallet.
On Wednesdays, you can enjoy $2 cocktails while on Thursdays they have $3 cocktails.
Visit The Atlantic on Thursday night for ladies night when ladies drink free all night
long. Or, come by on Friday nights when 80’s music fills the room. The Atlantic is one of
the only diverse bars at the beach allowing you to just chill or dance all night long. The
choice is yours.
Get your friends together for a night out at The Atlantic. Free drinks for the ladies and
dancing all night long. I can’t think of a better night.
Bartender Reviews
Lisa Flemming - Lynch’s
Age: 27
Experience: 6 Years
Single: No
Favorite:
Mixed Drink: Dirty Ketel One Martini
Shooter: Minderaser
Beer: Stella Artois
Specialty drink:
Peach Madness: Stoli Peach,
OJ & 2 splashes of cranberry
Most Memorable Bar Story:
I met my husband and the best friends I
have ever known here, at Lynch’s Irish Pub.
Clarence Wilson - Aromas
Age: 26
Experience: 2 yrs
Single: Depends
Favorite:
Mixed Drink: Mojitos
Shooter: Jager and Tequilla
Beer: Sam Adams
Specialty drink:
Raspberry Mojito
Most Memorable Bar Story:
People will do anything for a drink & I
mean anything.
4 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 1st day of Christmas my true love gave to me

ON TA
P Guide
to Jacksonville Bar & Resturant Specials
Sponsored By
a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
5

“Holiday History”
Whether celebrating the season of giving or the festival of lights, the holidays are for
family, community and tradition. So get your stockings out of the attic, light your trees
and get your candles ready because the holidays are here.
Christmas, dating back over 4,000 years, was celebrated centuries before the Christ
child was even born. The gift giving, parades filled with floats, carolers and huge
feasts can all be traced back to the early Mesopotamians. Many of these early
traditions began with the celebration of the New Year. Europeans celebrated light and
birth in the darkest days of winter. Many people rejoiced during the winter solstice,
when the worst of the winter was behind them and they could look forward to longer
days and extended hours of sunlight.
Early Europeans celebrated a similar festival as the Winter Solstices approached,
marking a time for long, cold nights and short days. Special rituals and celebrations
were held to welcome back the sun.
The Hanukkah holiday meaning “dedication” in Hebrew originated when Judah the
Maccabees and his followers reclaimed the temple in the village of Modi’in from Syrian
King Antiochus IV. The sacred temple was relit with only enough oil to burn for one
day. Yet, according to tradition the oil miraculously lasted for eight days, hence, a
candle is lit for each day for the celebration of Hanukkah.
The traditional foods consumed during the Hanukkah holiday are symbolic of the
events being celebrated. Foods are fried in oil symbolizing the oil that lasted eight
days. Pancakes and deep-fried puff balls are two of the most common dishes served.
www.holidays.net/christmas www.thehoildayspot.com
www.history.com/minisites/christmas/viewPage?pageId=1252
Dear Wine Cellar,
I met this guy through friends about 3 weeks ago. He is soooo cute and he
needed a place to live, so I let him move in with me. I live by myself and have for
years. I was feeling a little lonely. I have a spare bedroom and he told me he had
a job with a surveying company so he could help with the rent. The problem is
apparently he lost his job because he is on my couch watching my television every
time I get home from work! Okay, and I did get a little tipsy one night, made a
move on him, so he only slept in the guest room one night. He’s eating me out
of house and home. He wants to go out with me all the time, on my tab! HELP
ME! I have to get his low-rider out of my driveway! I am not kidding, it’s low
and it’s purple!
Dear Hapless Helper,
I would say I admired your generosity, but I don’t. Letting this guy move in
with you is the most selfish thing you could do. You were lonely and bored.
You saw an opportunity for someone to entertain you for a little while and you
seized it. Now, your jester has gone bad like a rotting eggplant. Let’s start with
your first mistake.
Ladies and Gentlemen, do not let someone move in with you without getting
them to sign a lease describing the terms of the agreement! Make sure there
is an out clause for situations like the above. Check references, credit and
otherwise. Even if your friends know this person, people can be sneaky and
you may not know truly what you’re getting into. Please stop opening up your
doors to strangers.
Also, do not become intimately involved with said person. Romantics can make
a living situation very sticky, especially if the person is down, needy, and out.
Sex confuses people. Put your hand down a man’s pants and you might as well
have opened his heart.
Okay, now, you need to give him a date to be out of your house. Be sure to
have a large, protective male friend in the other room, just in case. You don’t
know this guy, remember that. Research this, but I think Florida law gives a
person 30 days to stay in a place before they are considered a resident so get
him out now! And please, silly girl, don’t do this again. I hope you see that
being alone isn’t horrible!
For advice from our Whine Cellar email us at: Advice@jaxbars.com
6 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 2nd day of Christmas my true love gave to me

Drinking on a budget
can be a difficult task,
but not impossible, with
a little planning you
can go out all weekend
with out burning a hole
in your pockets. When
we asked three people to
drink on a Thursday, Friday
and Saturday night and only
spend $50, they each came
up with their own game plan
to stretch their dollar as far
as possible. Having plenty of
experience drinking all around
town, they were under the
impression that this assignment
would be a breeze, however,
the rules threw them a little off.
They were not allowed to: tell
anyone what they were doing,
to try to get people to buy them
drinks, or go to the same bar and
the $50 had to include tax and tip.
Although you may be thinking that
a weekend out at various bars with
only $50 may end up being lame,
these three people had a blast every
night out and never went over their
budget. The key to their success was
a good guide to all the drink specials
around town (Jaxbars.com Buzz) so
they could map out their game plan.
Patrick
Typical Weekend Spending: $100-$200
How Often You Go Out: 2 weekends a month
Alcohol Tolerance: 12 pk of beers or 3 Jager Shots
Putting on my Thursday Night shoes, I decided to head out for some of the best reggae
in Jacksonville. My buddy DJ Raff was spinning up at Spare Time so I figured I would
stop up there for a few shots and to say what’s up to some friends. Spare Time is
legendary for there $1 PBR, Old Milwaukee’s and the BEAST. Also, they are very kind
to sell $3 Jagers shots. I am not a big fan of Jager, so I only let my friend convince me to
have a few shots. I ended up buying 2 Jager shots and 10 PBRs for me and one for my
buddies that I haven’t seen for awhile. Total bill at Spare Time was 2 shots of Jager and
the PBRs for me and my friend with tip was $22.
It is Friday night, finally. The work week is over and everyone is ready to relax and
have a good time. I started my night off at a house warming party with some free food
and drinks in Jax Beach. House warming parties are always great when working with
budgets because you get free food and drinks. But to stay true to the rules of this game,
I only drank one beer, well I funneled one beer. I left $1.50 for the Steel Reserve and
headed out to my favorite bar, LandShark Café. I always like going out to LandShark
for Punk Rock Fridays. LandShark always has $1 PBR and Miller High Life every Friday
night. I sat up there for the rest of the night drinking only Miller High Life. I spent ½
my remaining money and left with a nice buzz. After tipping and drinking total expenses
was $14.
After finally waking up on Saturday, I figured I would get an early start on this
experiment and enjoy the day. So I went over to Tijuana Flats for a $5 pitcher and
enjoyed a little bit of football and beer. I decided to stay for one more pitcher. My total
bill after tip was $15. I decided to call it a day and get ready for the Jaguar Game on
Sunday. My liver will never forgive me for drinking this much cheap beer. But I was
proud I only went over $1 on budget after paying and tipping for the day. Riding back to
my house I found $1 in front of Publix. Karma was looking out for me.
Drinking on a Budget
2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
Erica
Typical Weekend Spending: $100
How Often You Go Out:
Twice a week
Alcohol Tolerance (amount to get
drunk): 5 beers or 3 Shots
Thursday night started at Fionn
MacCools in Atlantic Beach with
our favorite server, Patrick. My
friend, Mandel, ordered us a round of his famous Help Me Jesus shots. It’s half
Patron and half Bacardi 151. It’s a $10 shot, but one is all you need and you’ll need help
from Jesus after taking it. Trust me on that one! After regaining composer and my
stomach, my friends and I headed off to On The Rocks on San Pablo and Beach Blvd.
I already had a buzz walking in. They have $1.50 PBR all the time. It’s not a bad beer
when drinking on a budget. I had 2 PBRs and my boyfriend, Matt had 2. I work up
there once a week, so saw some regulars and they bought Matt and me both a shot. We
stayed there the rest of the night playing trivia and having a good time. I had a great
buzz and spent a total of $20 for the evening after tipping.
A little trick to drinking on a budget: if you have any beer in the fridge, chug one before
you go out. My personal favorite is shot-gunning a beer can. Friday night brought me
downtown to the Dive Bar. It is in no way indicative of its name. Matt describes it best,
saying it’s like walking through a flashback. The entire bar pays homage to the music of
the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s with a character that embodies all three eras. The atmosphere is
fun and relaxed with an awesome VIP room. It is a circular room lined with plush seats
and pillows. Black lights illuminate the seemingly endless posters that line the wall for
a look that can only be enhanced by illegal substances (if you get my drift). The staff
was friendly and quick to serve. The live music, velvet couches and funky chairs added
to the overall feel of the theme. This bar is a much-needed refreshment to the stagnant
downtown night life. Matt and I each had 3 $2 16 oz Bud Lights, just enough to get on
the dance floor and boogie the night away. Total expense: $15.
At least once a week, we like to go to our favorite local pub, the Local’s Bar in San
Marco. The atmosphere is great for friends to go out and have a fun, chilled out night.
The bartenders are always on point with your drinks and are fun to be around. They
are also pretty hot for you guys. It not super crowded or smoky. I decided to drink shots
with water or Sprite in between to maximum by budget and my buzz. I had 3 shots at $4
a piece. My boyfriend, being the sweetie that he is, bought me a couple of beers too. I got
pretty drunk and had a great time watching Gator football and hanging out with friends.
The Local’s Bar also doesn’t kick us out when we get loud and crazy during the games….
always a good thing. Total expense for the week $47.
Natalia
Typical Weekend Spending: $100-$150
How Often You Go Out: 4 nights a week
Alcohol Tolerance (amount to get drunk): 8 Beers and 3 Shots
Thursday night is the start of my weekend as a college student at Jacksonville Beach.
Continued on pg. 22
7

Beer of the month review
Frohe Weihnachten Merry Christmas
Notes: There are so many good winter warmer ales
and holiday spice beers this time of year, such as Sam
Adams Winter Lager, Breckinridge Christmas Ale, and
Snow Cap by Pyramid just to name a few. They are all
great, but this beer, Frohe Weihnachten, which is very,
very hard to find, might be one of the greatest tasting
Country: Germany
beers that have ever landed on my lips. Truly a great find
Type: Euro Strong Lager
for any beer fan. It comes in collectible pottery bottles,
but don’t let that fool you about the serious taste inside.
Brewed By: Crailsheimer Engelbrau Dark in color with an aroma of caramel and malt with
Alcohol %: 7.0%
light spice flavor, it delivers a very smooth taste with a
Serving Type: Comes in 16oz good amount of hops. Very seasonal in taste, but not too
Pottery bottle only
strong with the holiday spice flavor.
Wines of the month review
Sponsored By:
Year: 2004
Country: Sonoma, California
Grape: 100% Pinot Noir
Price: $45.00
Type: Red
Year: 2005
Country: Grampians,
Western Australia
Grape: 100% Riesling
Price: $22.99
Type: White
Year: 2004
Country: Bordeaux, France
Grape: 100% Merlot
Price: $21.99
Type: Rose
Wines only available at The Grape:
Belle Glos Clark & Telephone
Notes: Deep garnet color. Aromas of ripe
plums, brown spices, ranging from cinnamon
to cumin, and rich, freshly turned earth, with
hints of sweet caramel and barbecue smoke.
The tannins are soft and supple.
Mount Langhi Riesling
Notes: Balanced citrus fruit, pears,
blossom again and a nice minerality to its
structure. There’s a touch of residual sugar
here too, but only a touch. The finish is
clean, pure and lingers nicely.
Oriel Femme Fatale
Notes: Named for the irresistibly seductive
beauties of French history in whose honor
this wine of great color, beauty and character
is made. Bursting with scents of summer
fruits. Rich and full with flavors of strawberry,
raspberry and blackberry with a lasting finish.
cigar of the month review
Wrapper: Golden Connecticut Shade
Filler: Dominican, Mexican
Binder: Mexico San Andrean
Country of Manufacture: Dominican Republic
Overall Score: 9
Flavor: 8
Draw: 8
Appearance: 9.5
Ash: 8
Aroma: 9
Burn: 9
Consistency: 9.5
Construction: 8
Finish: 8
Smoothness: 9
Sponsored By:
Macanudo Gold Label
The Experience: The Macando
line of cigars are known for their
smoothness and consistency, while
at the same time offering different
tastes to please every palate. The
Connecticut Shade wrapper leaves
create a distinctive new taste for
premium cigar smokers.
8 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 3th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 3 Scotch & Sodas,

ON TA
P Guide
to Jacksonville Bar & Resturant Specials
Sponsored By
2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
9

Featured albums
3NEW CDs EVERYONE
SHOULD HAVE IN THEIR
MUSIC COLLECTION AND WHY
My Chemical Romance,
The Black Parade
Death, despair, and darkness pretty much sums up all
that this CD is about. The Black Parade hit shelves
Oct 24 with much anticipation. “The Black Parade” is
following in the footsteps of classic rock operas and
story based albums of the past, The Black Parade is a
concept album that, “…tells the story of a dying man
and his final “mental” journey through his life.” Must
buy if you are into the new rock scene.
Featured Band
Michael (drums)
Pete (guitar)
Bryan (bass)
Greg (vocals)
Website:
bouncingsouls.com
Bouncing Souls
Diddy, Press Play
After another name change Diddy, aka Puff Daddy
just cut his new album. “Press Play” hit the shelves
on October 3rd. Diddy wrote most of the tracks
with a lot of guest appearances from people such
as: Christina Aguilera, Nicole Scherzinger, Big Boi,
Ciara, Timbaland, Twista, Avant, Nas, Cee-Lo, Mario
Winans, Brandy, Keyshia Cole, Mary J. Blige, and
Jamie Foxx among others. Personally I am not a huge
fan of this wanta’ be rap icon but I must say some of
the songs are pretty decent. Pick it up if you like the
new rap that has been coming out, but for all of you
roots people, don’t bother buying this glam
rap album.
The Killers, Sam’s Town
Well today it is almost hard to watch any music
TV stations or turn on the radio without hearing
something from these guys. The Killers have
broken into the main stream music industry and
have a lot of bands following their sound. The
Killers released “Sam’s Town” on Oct. 3rd. “Sam’s
Town” has a more polished and more atmospheric
sound than their debut album. Getting much air
time on MTV, this CD will give the teenie bobber
something to chew on for a few months. Personally
I think the last few months of new relases have
sucked. Maybe we will be luckier next year. Sorry.
Bouncing Souls are one of the longest-lived bands that have graced us with their
presence in the punk music scene, getting their start back in 1987 in New Jersey.
In the early stages of their career, they played a blend of punk, funk, metal, and
just about anything else they felt like including. Bouncing Souls were known for
their energetic live show. After putting out 5 full-length albums, Bouncing Souls
have carved out their own unique punk rock sound. Touring around the country,
promoting their latest cd, “The Gold Record”, you will be able to catch the packed
out show at Fuel on 12/10 with the home town band that jumped on the tour with
them, Whole Wheat Bread. Be sure to check out this legendary act this month.
The underground
Picture
Jeff (Lead Vocals, guitar)
John (bass)
Jon (drums)
Wes (lead guitar)
Website:
somethingdistantmusic.com
Something Distant
Something Distant is a well-known band right out of Jacksonville, FL who
can be described as a multitalented group known for their catchy hooks,
unassuming lyrics, and rock till you drop concerts. Blending sounds of pop,
rock, and acoustic, Something Distant will give you a show that will put
everyone in a great mood. From cover songs to originals this band has a
unique sound you will love. With all their talent and originality, we predict
that Something Distant will soon become the new college cult band (which is
a good thing).
10 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 4th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 4 Gin & Tonics,

CONCERTS
Purchase tickets at Pollstar or Ticket Master or at the door.
01-Dec Casper & The Cookies at
TSI
03-Dec Reel Big Fish at
Plush
03-Dec Streetlight Manifesto at
Plush
03-Dec Suburban Legends at
Plush
05-Dec The Summer Obsession at
Jack Rabbits
05-Dec Dropping Daylight at
Jack Rabbits
05-Dec Monty are I at
Jack Rabbits
06-Dec Music as a Weapon Tour at
Jacksonville Veterans Mem.
06-Dec Disturbed at
Jacksonville Veterans Mem.
06-Dec Flyleaf at
Jacksonville Veterans Mem.
06-Dec Nonpoint at
Jacksonville Veterans Mem.
06-Dec Stone Sour at
Jacksonville Veterans Mem.
07-Dec Circle Jerks at
Fuel
07-Dec Christian McBride at
Robinson Theatre
08-Dec The Dark Romantics at
Jack Rabbits
08-Dec Christian McBride at
Robinson Theatre
10-Dec Bouncing Souls at
Fuel
10-Dec Whole Wheat Bread at
Fuel
11-Dec George Carlin at
Times-Union Center
12-Dec Tony Bennett at
Florida Theatre
21-Dec Clay Aiken at
Moran Theatre
13-Jan Rod Stewart at
Jacksonville Veterans Mem.
3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
11

O
N
T
H
E
12 You know you’re a drunk when...
S
E
E
N
On 5th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 5 Cuervo Gold,

4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
13

14 On 6th day of Christmas my You true know love gave you’re to me a 6 drunk Bloody Marys, when... 5 Cuervo Gold,

4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
15

RJ Gators
Gourmet Guide
Dining Reviews on Jacksonville Restaurants
Style: Seafood Bar and Grille
Location: 9762 Deer Lake Court
Contact: rjgators.com
Phone - 446-2088
With a 2-4-1 happy hour all day, everyday why not stop in R.J Gator’s for a quick drink.
While you are there, you have to try some of their market fresh fish. If you are a seafood
lover R.J. Gator’s is the perfect spot for you with menu items such as seared Ahi tuna,
crab cakes and buckets of shrimp. The island atmosphere is a great spot for a first date or
to just grab a bite with friends.
R.J. Gator’s even offers special discounts for their regulars, with Very Important
Gator cards. This offer lets you earn points for credit to be used for food, beverage or
merchandise. Join now and start earning points with every visit. R.J. Gator’s is now
offering curbside to go service, so stop in for a fun night or pick up some dinner to take
home.
Seven Bridges
Style: Resturant / Bar
Location: 9735 Gate Parkway N.
Contact: 7bridgesgrille.com
Phone - 997-1999
Elxir
Color
Are you ready for the taste of award winning lagers and made from scratch food? Then
head over to Seven Bridges. Sister company of A1A Works and Ragtime, Seven Bridges
has a relaxing atmosphere with seating both inside and out. Ales and lagers are SUN brewed
right there in the restaurant, many of which are found only at Seven Bridges, such as
Sweet Magnolia Brown Ale.
Seven Bridges is serving dishes from pizza and sandwiches to main entrees such as Cajun
Fettuccine and Blackened Mahi Mahi. All pizzas feature signature, homemade crust
tossed with a splash of Sweet Magnolia Brown Ale for added taste. Whether you want to
stop in for a quick lunch or a fine dining experience Seven Bridges offers a great ambiance
for either occasion.
Mellow Mushroom
Style: Pizzeria
Location: 9734 Deer Lake Court
Contact: mellowmushroom.com
Phone: 997-1955
Mellow Mushroom, in the heart of Tinselton Town, is more than just your average pizza
place. With psychedelic paintings covering the walls and mushrooms hanging from the
ceiling for a “trippy” décor, this place is great for a quick bite to eat. Mellow Mushroom
bakes everything to order so you know you’re getting the best quality food, and while
you’re waiting, grab a beer; specials everyday.
Try one of their specialty pizzas with over 30 toppings to chose from, I promise you will
not be disappointed. However, pizza is not thier only forte, stop in for hoagies, salads
and calzones. Mellow Mushroom also offers live entertainment on weekend nights; this
place is perfect for lunch, dinner and a night out with your friends.
16 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 7th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 7 Dry Martinis, 6 Bloody Marys, 5 Cuervo Gold,

ON TA
P Guide
to Jacksonville Bar & Resturant Specials
Sponsored By
4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
17

the lamp shade award
The Dos and Don’ts of Holiday Office Parties
Unless you are a non-contributor to society, which you may be if you are reading
this magazine, you have a job and therefore have been to office parties. You no
doubt have witnessed someone making a jerk out of themselves or you yourself
have been seen doing something regrettable. At my first out-of-college office
party, I ended up smoking pot with my boss’ husband outside the restaurant. Not
only did that piss her off, she now had probable cause to fire my stupid butt.
Luckily, her husband worked for us too, so my job was safe. Here are several hints
that can help you keep your job and your dignity. Much like your virginity, you will
never get these back.
DO wear office appropriate garb. Unless you work in a bar or a strip club, tone
down your outfit. Otherwise, I’d say dress as scandalously as you please. However,
for this event, your comptroller doesn’t need to know that you like to show off
your hairy chest wearing loud polyester shirts with the buttons four too many undone.
DON’T drink to excess. I cannot stress this one enough. If this party serves
alcohol, watch your intake. Eggnog may be a delicious and frothy holiday treat,
but eggnog regurgitated on your boss’ loafers after you hit on his wife, well, that’ll
cost ya’.
DO make sure your date is up to speed on the office personnel details.
If the owner of your company has a lazy eye or a huge mole on her
face, warn your date ahead of time. Sadly, we are not well-mannered
creatures and you don’t want to get extra work on Monday because
your boyfriend couldn’t quit staring like a deer in headlights at
your boss’ abnormality.
DON”T go in the copy room. 500 copies of your ass plastered
all over the office is not a good idea. Not only could a stunt
like this get you fired for sexual harassment, no woman will
want to go near you. All
you’ll end up with is
no job and a nickname like
Dingleberry.
DO mingle. There is
nothing worse
than a wallflower. You don’t have to have detailed conversations with every
attendee, however, you should at the very least, just get in a few breezy words
with the powers that be, especially in a large corporation. I realized in college,
that I got better grades if I introduced myself to the professor. The same rule
applies to the workforce. Who do you think will get a promotion, the guy who
plays with himself in the corner all night or the guy who’s name is known?
DON’T sing karaoke unless you really have a voice like Celine Dion or at
least Dion Warwick. No matter how beautiful you may think your version of
Silent Night sounds, be honest with yourself. Most professional singers have
a hard time with hitting the notes of that holiday favorite and honey you are
no professional. This will surely land you in the butt of jokes at the Monday
morning water cooler.
DO thank your host/hostess before you check out. Make sure it is apparent that
you appreciate all of the work that went into the planning process. Granted,
if you had been in charge of decorating, you may not have gone the route of a
papier-mâché snowman, but some poor fool put a lot of heart and tears into the
carrot nose.
DON’T drink and drive. Not only could the company be held liable
should anything happen to you while driving home sloshed from
the party, it looks extremely irresponsible should you
survive your stupidity.
DO enjoy yourself! Just make sure you don’t end up
with a lamp shade on your desk the following Monday.
Written By: Courtney Nichols
18 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 8th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 8 Margaritas, 7 Dry Martinis, 6 Bloody Marys,

ADVERTISMENT
5 Cuervo Gold, 4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
19

The Dueling Pianos Craze
Every weekend starts to feel like the previous one. Yeah, you have fun, but you are
starting to get a little tired of the status quo. You keep running into the same people and
sure they’re fun, but you want to meet someone different for once or try something new
for a change. Same old story. Different weekend. As Jacksonville and the Beaches grow,
so does the desire to have the same entertainment as other markets such as Orlando,
Miami, Chicago, and Atlanta. We want the top restaurants, the best concerts as well as the
great entertainment venues. Why not,
we are the fourteenth largest city in
the US.
One of the fasting growing genres on
the entertainment scene that is in all
those other markets nearly made it to
Jacksonville at the end of 2005. On
November 4, 2005, the Jacksonville
Business Journal wrote a story titled,
“Piano Bar Eyes Landing Location.”
National dueling piano bar, Howl at
the Moon was looking at opening
their 14th location right on our
riverfront. The deal fell through, but
Jacksonville didn’t lose hope.
Many larger markets have been
franchising piano bars due to their
guaranteed-good-time atmosphere.
For those who don’t know or have
never been to a dueling piano bar
the concept is quite simple. Two
piano players/entertainers play songs
the audience dictates. So it’s like
watching a band where all they play is
dedications? Not at all. Nor is it two
piano players trying to out-perform
each other. Rather, the two players
work together to provide a highenergy
show in which the audience is
as much a part of the entertainment as is the performers. You won’t find another form of
entertainment that can match what the dueling pianos players can do. These aren’t your
old piano teachers on keyboards. These are funny, artistic, showmen who play popular
songs, requested by the audience as well as comedic lyrics in place of some standard lyrics,
light-hearted roasts of audience members, and a high-energy mix of music and comedy.
The show is different from night to night.
Finally the dueling piano craze landed in Jacksonville this past summer. In June, 2006,
Crazy 88s Dueling Pianos opened up their first location in the Tinseltown Shopping
Center. Crazy 88s Dueling Pianos teamed up with Dick’s Wings Tinseltown, to bring a
new form of entertainment to the Southside area. The talent for each show is different
every weekend. Crazy 88s books top players who perform at Howl at the Moon, Sing
Sing, and other dueling piano bars around the country and bring them to Jacksonville.
Crazy 88s looked at several venues to host Crazy 88s Dueling Pianos, and finally selected
Dick’s Wings because of their central location, demographics and room size. The
Southside area continues to grow, but until now there really hasn’t been a bar in the
Tinseltown area that provides this
type of great entertainment on a
regular basis.
Most recently, Crazy 88s opened
their second location at the Beach
inside the front part of the Ocean
Club. With the success of the first
location it seemed obvious to provide
the same entertainment to the
thousands of people who love going
out in Jax Beach area every weekend.
Teaming up with the Ocean Club
and converting the front bar, what
used to be Bubba’s Lounge, into their
second location. Sharing the same
excitement of opening a dueling
piano bar at the beach, the Ocean
Club invested into the conversion
of the old Bubba’s Lounge. Now
completely redesigned, Crazy 88s
newest location resides in what is
now called The Lounge at Ocean
Club. The same format can be
found at the Beaches location with
different top players from other cities
performing every weekend.
Dueling pianos has the reputation of
being a fun and energetic show that
can be found in many major markets.
Crazy 88s management knows it’s important for them to continue to bring in different
talent every weekend so the show is always new. Having this new form of entertainment
is something Jacksonville needs in order to continue to grow its nightlife scene. If you are
ready to try something different or shake off your old drinking habits, visit either location
this weekend.
Crazy 88s Dueling Pianos is open every Friday and Saturday night. The Tinseltown
location starts each night at 9:00 pm and the players perform until 1:00am. The players at
the Beaches location start each Friday and Saturday at 10:00pm and play until 2:00am. For
more information or for reservations on Jacksonville’s only dueling piano bar, Crazy 88s,
visit their website: www.jaxduelingpianos.com or call (904) 394-7196.
20 On 9th day of Christmas my true love You gave know to me 9 you’re Manhattans, a drunk 8 Margaritas, when... 7 Dry Martinis,

ON TA
P Guide
to Jacksonville Bar & Resturant Specials
Sponsored By
SUN
6 Bloody Marys, 5 Cuervo Gold, 4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
21

Drinking on a Budget
Continued from pg. 7
Generally no students have class on Fridays unless they got screwed and had no choice
other than to take a Friday class. On Thursday nights there are many places with good
drink specials but Twisted Sister’s (Beach
Blvd) has an advantage over other venues at
Jax Beach. Twisted Sister’s has live reggae
every Thursday night along with $1 draft
beers. There is no entrance fee like other
places around the beach. Twisted Sister’s
also has a fun atmosphere with eclectic
pictures all over the walls, a ping-pong
table, couches in the back and vintage vinyl
album covers everywhere. You cannot go
to Twisted on Thursdays without being
surrounded by beet-necks and dreads. I
danced with an avid reggae lover, he taught
me the “crane”, a popular move among the
Rasta culture. In all, I only spent $12 which
included seven nice size drafts and a $5 tip,
I had a nice buzz and danced for the rest of
the night.
The next night (Friday) is always spent at
Spare Time (N. 3rd St.). Reggae is a great
genre for people who like to go out and feel
the music and let the music move them.
Again, there is no entrance fee and they
have great drink specials for someone on a
budget; Jager shots are $3, Jager bombs are only $4, Bush Light, Natural Light and PBRs
in a can are $1. Some of their other specials include Miller Lite cans for $1.50, $2 calls and
$4.25 Socos. With drinks like these how could you go wrong? Last Friday I was singledout
by one of the band members of De Lions of Jah to come dance with them on stage. It
was fun, but one song was enough for me. I had a blast and only spent $11 plus a $5 tip.
(Being a pretty unattached female I was able to score a few free shots from various guys
that I met during the night.)
I spent my final night of fun at my usual Saturday
night spot, Sneakers (Beach Blvd) where I get to
visit my favorite bartender, Christian. Christian
is always on top of his game. As soon as he sees
me, he has an ice-cold Bud Light bottle and a
shot of Jager lined on the bar. Although Sneakers
is a sports grill, if you go with good company you
can enjoy some great late night specials. Every
Friday and Saturday night from 12 a.m. to 2 a.m.
is happy hour with $2 calls like Jager, 1800 and
Soco, $1.50 domestic bottles and $2 domestic
beers. Sneakers is my style on Saturdays because
it is less crowded and you don’t have to scream to
have a conversation with someone. For the entire
night I spent only $19, which included five beers,
a three shots of Jager and a $5.50 tip. Christian
being a great bartender and friend who enjoys my
company bought me a couple shots. As a custom,
the people in my group tend to buy a round of
shots for everyone. We take turns on whose week
it is to do so.
I had a blast last weekend; I listened to some great music, drank cheap drinks, enjoyed
great company and only spent $47 for three full nights of fun. Anyone on a small budget
can enjoy a weekend of fun at bars. All you need is to check out local specials in the Buzz
and find a few people to buy you a couple drinks.
22 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 10th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 10 Sex-on-the beaches, 9 Manhattans, 8 Margaritas, 7 Dry Martinis,

Know Your Stuff!
1. What were used as the first Christmas stockings?
2. What type of tree is often used as a Christmas tree?
3. Where do reindeer live, besides the North Pole?
4. What is the traditional Christmas flower?
5. What was the 1st Christmas tree decorated with?
6. Hanukkah is celebrated during what month?
7. Hanukkah lasts for how many days?
8. Who is the Hebrew warrior that’s commemorated in Hanukkah?
9. Are Santa’s Reindeer Male or Female? Male reindeer generally shed their
antlers before Dec. 25th, whereas the females retain theirs until at least Jan. The reindeer pulling
Santa’s sleigh are always shown as having antlers, so Santa’s reindeer must all be females.
10. Are Reindeer Really Deer? Yes. Reindeer are a species of deer located in the
Arctic regions. The largest Reindeer can reach four feet high at the shoulder and weigh up to 250
pounds. It is believed that there are no longer any wild Reindeer, the entire species seems to have
been domesticated. Each Reindeer can pull up to twice its own weight, making it an ideal for pulling a
sleigh loaded with any amount of cargo. 9 Reindeer could pull a sleigh with 13,500 lbs of toys for an
unlimited amount of time.
1. Children’s long socks 2. Fir Tree 3. Northern Europe and Asia 4. Poinsettia
5. Red Apples 6. December 7. Eight 8. Judas Maccabeus
Joke of the Month
It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,
“What are you charged with?” “Doing my Christmas shopping early,” replied
the defendant. “That’s no offense,” said the judge. “How early were you doing
this shopping?” “Before the store opened,” countered the prisoner.
BEER BOGGLE
Catergory: Holiday Beers
brain food
BLITZEN
COMET
CUPID
DANCER
DASHER
DECEMBER
Word Search
R C T H R V H H C E Q B K S
H E X H I E P G O O L F T E
P J I X G L B T I I M U S A
R A E N O I E M T E F E H I
E N T D D L N Z E F L R T T
S M U N T E E T I C H S A T
E R W S A N E N N C E R E E
N N I T R S G R L E X D R S
T M T S I L H S I W L U W N
S P R A N C E R K V R I C I
S L L A H E H T K C E D S O
H T O G O N G G E U H I E P
S T O C K I N G S Z S P L T
D A N C E R R Q H Y A U F X
B R E D N O D V M E D C Z E
DECKTHEHALLS
DONDER
EGGNOG
ELF
MISTLETOE
POINSETTIA
PRANCER
PRESENTS
REINDEER
RUDOLPH
SANTA
SILENTNIGHT
SLEIGH
STOCKINGS
STUFFING
VIXEN
WISHLIST
WREATHS
KRINGEBRICED
SWAN COP
UMINTS WRITEM
SCHMALTIS ARE
December
HAPPY HOUR PARTIES
For more information and your chance to win a free
happy hour party for you and 25 friends, call:
394-7196
SIR MADEM SANTAW
Clue:
Where does everyone want to be during the Holidays?
Breckinridge, Snow Cap, Sam Adams Winter, Christmas Ale, Summit Winter; Answer: Under Mistletoe
Cryptogram Phrases
USE THE HINTS BELOW TO REVEAL THE HIDDEN PHRASE
12/1 Crazy 88s(Beaches) 9-10pm
12/1 Crazy 88s (Dick’s Wings) 7-9pm
12/7 Atlantic Theatre Comedy Club 7-9pm
12/8 Aromas 6-8pm
12/8 Crazy 88s(Beaches) 9-10pm
12/8 Crazy 88s (Dick’s Wings) 7-9pm
12/14 The Grape 6-8pm
12/14 Harmonious Monks 6:30-9:30pm
12/15 Crazy 88s(Beaches) 9-10pm
12/15 Crazy 88s(Dick’s Wings) 7-9pm
12/21 Atlantic Theatres Comedy Club 7-9pm
12/22 Crazy 88s(Beaches) 9-10pm
12/29 Crazy 88s(Beaches) 9-10pm
12/29 Crazy 88s(Dick’s Wings) 9-10pm
6 Bloody Marys, 5 Cuervo Gold, 4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
23

To have your business listed
email - mike@cfmedia.net or
Call - 232-3001
To have your business listed
email - mike@cfmedia.net or
Call - 232-3001
24 You know you’re a drunk when...
On 11th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 11 Screaming Orgasms, 10 Sex-on-the beaches, 9 Manhattans, 8 Margaritas,

7 Dry Martinis, 6 Bloody Marys, 5 Cuervo Gold, 4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
25

JOBS
Anderson Outdoors
Now hiring Landscape
Technitians and Landscape and
Pest Control Sales People.
Contact Chris at 904-716-8118
On The Rocks
Now hiring bartenders.
Contact Hani at 685-5268
14286 Beach Blvd.
Aqua Grill
Now interviewing for positions
of Line Cooks and Pantry. Great
Pay and Benefits. Apply in
person or Fax resume to
285-3017
Contact Cary Paige- GM
950 Sawgrass Village, Ponte
Vedra Beach.
Red Lion Tavern
Now hiring short order cook
and bartendars. Aloha
touchscreen experience
preferred. Must have Florida
food server card and experience
in short order cooking.
Contact: Kandace Stokes or Pat
Ketch 904-353-6891. 2104
Talleyrand Ave.
Jacksonville, Fl 32206
Jaxbars.com
Now hiring positions for
promotional work.
Contact Mike White at
904-394-7196
Twisted Martini
Do you think you have what it
takes to work at Jacksonville’s
Premiere Martini Lounge &
Dance Venue? Are you a skilled
professional, reliable team player
with an Award-Winning Smile &
a Positive Attitude?
We are only looking for the
very best: Bartenders, Cocktail
Servers, Door Hosts, Barbacks,
Kitchen Staff & Porters
Apply In Person for All Positions,
Monday - Friday, 10 am - 4 pm,
BO’S
CORAL
REEF
Beaches Only
Alternative
club
HAPPY HOUR
MONDAY - SUNDAY
4 pm - 9 pm
$ 2.25 Wells,
Drafts & Longnecks
MONDAY’S 11pm - CLOSE
Late Night Happy Hour
Tuesday Night join Vince
With $ 5.00 Pitcher Beer
Wednesday 9pm - 1am
KARAOKE with CRAZY CHRIS
THURSDAY & SUNDAY
SHOWTIME 10:30
FRIDAY & SATURDAY
10:30 & 12:00am
(904) 246-9874
201 FIFTH AVE N.
jacksonville beach.
florida 32250
(904) 246-9874
www.bosclub.com
Christian- see you around town, sorry it
didn’t work out - CF
Atlantic Theatres Comedy Club- the
Kevin Pollack show was one of the Best
shows I have ever seen. - mat dog
Christmas time is here- so go get your
eggnog and your mistletoe and have a
great holiday! - Santa
All of you people that shopped on the
day after Thanksgiving- YOU ARE
CRAZY! - Patrick
Chris and Brandy- congrats on your kid,
he looks beautiful
Be sure to check out the new look of
the Jaxbars.com Buzz in January
- Buzz Staff
Britney Spears- now is our final time,
lets put all the childish games aside,
now that you are divorced we can be
together. – Your stalker
Karri and Charles- Congrats and thanks
for giving me a nephew! - Aunt Amy
HOROSCOPES
Aries (March 21- April 19)
Hope you are ready for some action. Not so much because you are looking dapper, but more likely the person you
are with is extremely horny this month. Don’t have a partner? Not my problem. Whine to someone else.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Romance this month for you Taurus is like a yellow traffic signal. What does that mean? One of two
things: either you either need to slow down or speed up. I can only tell you so much. You figure it out!
Gemini (May 21 – June 21)
Moon ain’t digging you this month, & that’s never good. Looks like you & your mate may be up for a few rounds.
Not in bed, but rather in the boxing ring. Try not to argue too much this month, & we’ll try to fix it in 2007.
Cancer (June 22 – July 22)
Careful Cancer. Careful because everyone wants either to be with you or on you! Romance is in the
air stronger than the smell of pine. Take advantage and celebrate the holidays with style & go all out.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
You are irresistible; wait… that word is irrepressible. (What ever that means?) I hate copying other
horoscopes when they use big words. Anyways,...just be good this month & get things under control.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
What’s that? The Stars are saying things are looking up this month in the love department. Put that
energy to work and get the sparks flying. This is usually where I put in dry remark, but hey, it’s the
Holidays. I will resist this one time
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Ah, that Calvin & Hobbes just cracks me up. Why can’t his parents talk to Hobbes like he can?
Because it’s imaginary, just like the odds of you cuddling up to someone nice this month unless you get
out there and speak your mind. Quit being afraid to express yourself. Get on with it.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
Your attempts to be savvy are finally paying off. The rest of us are done laughing at you and are finally taking
notice. Don’t worry, we will find something else to poke fun at you, but for the mean time, rock-on Don Juan.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
What’s up happy-go-lucky? You have been bitten by the love bug bad. The first person to make you
laugh is going to win your heart over. I would stay away from the Comedy Clubs. Those guys are downright-funny,
but they travel a lot and the medical benefits are lousy.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
You are so busy with dreaming of what presents you are getting, that not only are the going to be
let-down, but you are missing out enjoying time with the one you’re with. Heads out of the clouds this
month or you may have a lot of alone time in your future.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
Holiday spirits have gotten the better of you. And yes, I mean spirits as in liquor. Go get your drunk on and
see what romance ensues. This should be a fun one to watch.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
Pisces, don’t be too flashy, go throw your best game at the one you want, because this month it actually
might work. In the words of Clark W. Griswold, “I wouldn’t be more surprised if I woke up tomorrow with my
head sewn to the carpet!” Then again, there is the let down when you realize you’re not famous & you spent
all your money.
by the way
Sorry Byron looks like Gerrard is
going to beat you out of a job, now if
only the rest of the team could get it
together...Go Jags! - Big Guy
Katie- Sorry you missed Martini Fest
with Dueling Pianos...it was awesome!
- Jake
Brad- your shirt was awesome, did you
pick up a lot of chicks that night?
- Jealous
Bamy- Angies’ and the O.C. was fun
Thursday. We missed you Suzanne!
- Ramy
Broke Till Friday- You guys put on an
awesome show can’t wait to see you
again! - Broke Till Wednesday
Go Gators SEC Champs!!
- Your Biggest Fan
To include a ‘By The Way’ for
next month, email us:
bytheway@jaxbars.com
26 On 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me 12 Alka Seltzer, You 11 know Screaming you’re Orgasms, a 10 drunk Sex-on-the when...
beaches, 9 Manhattans,

The Grape
8 Margaritas, 7 Dry Martinis, 6 Bloody Marys, 5 Cuervo Gold, 4 Gin & Tonics, 3 Scotch & Sodas, 2 Pints of Guinness & a glass of Long Island Iced Tea!
27

28 You know you’re a drunk when...