1 Death and the Lighthouses (1 January 2001)

when we have witnessed it, because at least we can be certain that his or
her absence is real and permanent. There are stories of parents whose
children went missing in foreign lands, who after twenty years of suffering
have not given up their search. For these parents, a sentence in a news
report which claims the death of so-and-so, is not real, is not death, and an
inner denial will torment them until their own deaths.
*
But what do we mean by death Matthew, Mark and Luke, whose
opinions otherwise differed, found a middle-ground in their shared views
about death, and were discussing it in the bar only days before the accident.
—It’s often portrayed, said Luke, for example in Egyptian art, as a
journey. People will either look forward to it or fear it. It doesn’t matter
which, because at least both feelings allow for the belief in a continuation of
travel, of going somewhere.
—When people realise, added Mark, that the only journey is life itself,
they might find it easier accepting death. For death is the end of the
journey and there’s nowhere else to go.
—We rarely meet a rational person who is not afraid of death, unless he
or she believes in a spiritual after-existence, proposed Matthew. We try
desperately to find and keep religious faith, especially as we grow closer to
death through age, because religious faith promises a new life.
—But isn’t the thought of immortality even more frightening than the
alternative asked Luke. If we really consider what living forever actually
entails, how can we still desire it
*
*
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